Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Time: 4:27pm, September 20th 2015.
Mickey is still fucking missing.

“Goddammit Mickey.” Donald cursed.

Minnie sighed, closing her journal. "He should be back soon Donald." Despite her words however, she wasn't sure. Mickey had said he'd be back in thirty minutes, but it's been about 4 hours now. Surely gummy bears shouldn't take that long to find? Little did she know, it was not bears he was getting, but some other unidentified type of animal.

"Alright everybody! Let's take this scene again…" the director called. They had been trying to do the takes Mickey wasn't a part of, but those scenes were so few and far between that they were almost finished already.

Getting into position, an "action!" rang throughout the set.

Minnie clapped her hands, smiling as she looked up at the ghost decorations. "This will give Mickey a spook for sure!" She had these lines memorized by now, having said them so many times.

"Yeah! I'm sure it'll give him a shock!" Toodles smiled back- do they ever not smile though?- and continued meandering about.

"Now we just gotta wait for Mickey, hyuk!" Goofy laughed good heartedly.

Then, in a stroke of luck, the sound of a puttering car engine filled their ears. Turning to face the window, the cast made their way towards the sound.

The sound was, to everyone's relief and surprise, the tooncar! As the car parked, a honk rang out from the vehicle.
"Hey guys! I brought some special guests!"

Mickey pleasantly waved to the group, as if he hadn't been MIA for the past 4 hours. In the backseat, three children sat, confused but excited.

"I've never been to the big man's place before…" the tallest one looked at the house in surprise before turning to face the right. "At least not one like this, anyways."

"Man, this place sure is huge." The youngest one looked up at it, using her hand to shield her eyes from the sun.

"Well, this is just the clubhouse set- I don't actually live here." Mickey told the three, taking the keys out of his car. Hopping out, he opened the back door for the three children.

Once the group walked through the door, Minnie coughed to get their attention. "Mickey, who are these three?"

"Oh! I guess I never texted you about it," the famous mouse rubbed the back of his head. "I'm babysitting these three for the day!"

"And you… never thought to tell anyone once in the four hours you were gone?" Daisy asked, quirking an eyebrow.

Mickey chuckled awkwardly as a non-verbal apology. "I guess it must've slipped my mind…?"

The director sighed. "Mickey, that's great and all, but we need to continue the scene, and having children on the set isn't the greatest idea. And these kids in particular look pretty familiar… I just can't put my finger on it."

"Why I never!" The oldest one feigned offense. "We're-"

"They're some cameos from another studio!" Mickey cut in, lying through his teeth. Luckily, the director didn't question it.
Whether that was because of Mickey's acting skills or because of his status didn't matter at the moment.

The director shrugged. "Alright then… let's do a take for scene 13!" He called out to the cast.

Mickey pointed to a bench behind the camera men. "You three can sit there for now while we shoot these scenes, okay?"

The three nodded and jumped over- almost comedically- and landed on the bench, sitting perfectly poised on the wooden slab.

The director hummed in thought. He swore he had seen those kids before, but he couldn't for the life of him think of why.

He shook his head- no time to think of that now- and turned back to the cast. "Alright, positions everyone!"

The group skimmed over their lines before getting into place.

"Aaaaaand.. action!"

"Well, I'll be!" Mickey looked over to the kitchen, which was currently full of spiderwebs (of the fake variety), "I can't believe you made me a pie!"

He walked past the props, picking the pie up. "We should really dust this place soon." He told them, touching one of the webs as he walked out of the kitchen. "There are cobwebs everywhere."

"That's not the only thing that needs cleaning…" said the youngest of the trio, a small girl with a pink skirt and a flower in her hair.

The cameraman held up a 'shhhh' motion to them before turning back to the camera. Donald rolled his eyes, luckily out of view of the camera. Mickey really decided that bringing these kids specifically onto set was a good idea, huh.

The director sighed a bit in annoyance but didn't mind too much. They could edit that comment out in post, after all.

Daisy sighed a bit as Mickey left the view of the camera. "Well, that didn't work as planned…"

"What else could we do? We've used up all of our other options!" Minnie then turned to the camera.
"Maybe you can help us?"

"We'd love to!" The tallest of the three cartoon children jumped on screen, performing an exaggerated bow.

"Hey, what the-"

"Oh, why thank you!" Minnie smiled, returning the bow with a small curtsey. Normally she wouldn't be too keen on going off script like this, but today was a long day, and she and the rest of the cast deserved to have some fun. "What do you have in mind?"

The other two siblings jumped on screen as the slacks wearing kid smiled wider. "I'm glad you asked!"

A simple, jaunty piano tune began to play. After a short intro, the eldest sibling started to sing.

“If you wanna cause a fright~
Have him scared through the fortnight~”

The other two joined in, happy to help scare a big guy in the business.
“Get him spooked, get him fearing!
Scare him to the point of tearing!”

"Let's all cause him a big scare! Let's all cause him a big scare! Let's spook him down, till he's in the ground! Let's all cause him a big scare!"

The tallest kid pulled out a suit jacket from nowhere, quickly slipping it on and putting on a salesman voice. "So our plan is a genuine haunted house! And when I say genuine, I mean GENUINE- we know some people. I'm talkin’ spooky lighting, fake ghosts, real ghosts, real skeleton arms, fake skeleton heads- we're not like that Disney ride-, and most importantly..."

the middle child pulled out shovels from his gag pouch.

All three grinned happily. "...A real grave!"

"Let's get him fearing, get him spooked!
Let's make sure that he gets duped!"

"Let's all dig him a big grave! Let's all dig him a big grave! Let's get him down, put him in the ground! Let's all dig him a big grave!"

The three quickly looked at each other, their music sheet having been smudged at this line.
"We don't know what to put here! We don't know what to put here! We know this tune needs to go again! But we don't know what to put here!"

The oldest sibling walked the cast through their creation. "So as you can see, at the end of our helpful handy homemade haunted house lays an authentic grave, with a real tombstone and everything!"
"even an en*grave*ing!" The hat wearing child added, seeming excited.
The smallest of the three shrugged. "we don't know when he'll get here though, so we'll put the time in after."

Toodles looked at the tombstone worriedly. "when did you even get that-"
"don't worry about it, Toody!" The young girl pat Toodles back.

The smoky-topaz wearing sibling turned back to the rest or the cast. "Anyways, back to our presentation; here's the red X!"

The middle child cut in, stage-whispering. "it's where we're gonna push 'im in."

Minnie gasped. "Oh dear! Are you sure that's a good idea?"
The oldest child nodded, not having any doubts. "Ab-SOL-utely! We're toons after all!"

"So let's all get him in the big grave!"
Daisy blinked, "what?"
"Let's all get him in the big grave!"
Minnie shook her head in disbelief. "oh my!"
"And don't let-up, cover him right back up!
Let's all get him in the big grave!
Let's all keep him in the big grave!
Let's all leave him in the big grave!"
The three kids jumped on the table, ready to give the big finale with a 3 part harmony.
"And that'll give him a big scare!"

Toodles floated back a bit. "That's… a little much, don't you think?"

"Not at all! If anything, we're toning it down!" The youngest grinned. "We made sure to keep it simple!"

"Yep!" Pulling out a piece of sheet music, the oldest of the three showed the group the paper.

The middle child nodded, "you never use more than two fingers at a time!"

"Goodnight everybody!"

Minnie hummed, reading the sheet music. "I suppose so…"

The director coughed, trying to get the cast and the younger toons attention. "Your song sure was…" he paused. "...interesting. But you can't sing something like that on this show!"

"Have you heard nursery rhymes?" The tallest asked.

"Eh, that take was ruined from the start!" Donald waved his hand dismissively, "Might as well've had some fun with it."

"But now there's the issue of the mess that was made…" Daisy looked around at the haunted house that the three children had made during their dance. Despite the surprising amount of detail in the design, the dirt and debris was hard to ignore, and didn't do much to help the atmosphere.

However, the three puppy children didn't seem to agree. "What do ya mean? I think everything looks great!" The smallest one asked, looking around at everything but the mess.

The two boys agreed and nodded their heads as if their eyes weren't purposefully closed.

"Yep!"
"Uh-huh!"

Daisy sighed, this is why she was never getting kids of her own. Goofy on the other hand shrugged. "Alright then," he shook his head, turning to go into the kitchen. "I guess you won't get to have the clean-up cake."

The three blinked, Watching as Goofy grabbed a cake out of the fridge. Catching on, Minnie nodded. "That's right! Only kids who clean up their mess get a slice of the clean-up cake!" She smiled, walking over to the kitchen and gesturing at the rest of the cast to do the same.

The three looked at eachother, then back to the cake.

"But what if Mickey shows up while we're cleaning?" The tallest asked, trying to get out of cleaning still.

"Well, then I'm sure you three can think of something while he's walking through." Daisy shrugged.

The tallest sighed. "Alright, come on you guys-" he told the other two, pulling out brooms and dust pans from off-screen. "-let's get cleaning."

The younger siblings groaned, begrudgingly taking the cleaning items. They immediately got to work and in less than a minute they had finished, the dirt and debris somehow disappearing.
The hatted sibling burped, before chuckling a bit. "Excuse me." He chuckled.

Minnie smiled, clapping her hands happily. "Great! Now come on, we already have your pieces cut!"

The three bounced over, happily accepting the sweet treat.

The director sighed in defeat. "I'm taking a bathroom break…"

The three children waved happily as he left the set. Then a door opened.

"Alright y'all, I'm back!" Mickey called out to the rest of the cast. "Sorry for the delay, I was…" he blinked, not seeing anyone on the set. Putting down the lattes he had brought, he walked onto the set. Was this a part of the episode that he just skimmed over? He tended to do that a lot. Shrugging, he walked in. "Really, we should dust up." He touched the first web he found. They felt more real than last time, but that was probably just a different brand.
He continued on, making good-hearted remarks to all of the props, but he slowly began to feel a sense of unease. Some of the ghosts were more authentic then what the show's ratings would allow, but he still continued on. He was sure it was nothing.
Still however, his unease grew into nervousness. The Skeletons that had been littered throughout the set seemed more real than anyone could've gotten, unless it was from that Caribbean ride of course. But even then, those ones were…
He shook his head and continued on. His nervousness grew and grew until he found himself in front of a grave. The markings were unreadable until a lightning bolt illuminated the set, along with deafening thunder. Stumbling back a bit, he looked around for the culprits as he tried not to seem frantic.
The grave read "Mickey T. Mouse, 1928-2015"
"Who did this?!" Mickey called out.
Suddenly, he felt a large push, and he landed in the middle of the grave.
"If you must know…" three voices mused in unison.
"Yakko!"
"Wakko!"
"And Dot!"

Mickey blinked. "Wait-"

The unease immediately dropped, the three Warners smiling innocently down at the older toon.

Pluto looked down at his owner, a bone in his mouth.

Dot turned to the dog. "No, don't chew on that! We have to return that to the pirates of the Caribbean ride!" She called, running after Pluto as he bounded away. "Get back here, we can't get in any more trouble with another company!"

Yakko held out a hand, helping Mickey up.

"Y'know, we wouldn't have pushed you in if you didn't stand on the X." Wakko told him, standing near the grave and pointing to the ground.

"The what?" Mickey followed Wakko’s point until he was met with a glaringly obvious red marking on the floor. "Oh."

The two brothers chuckled a bit as Dot returned, holding a wet bone. "Gross…" she groaned, throwing it into a bag.

The sound of chewing popcorn grabbed Mickey's attention as he turned to face the sound. "What the- Donald!"

The duck shrugged. "What? This was entertaining!"

The mouse sighed. "Well, you got me. What made you even do all this?" He asked the three Warner siblings, to which they all smiled.

"They asked if we had an idea of what to do!"

The main mouse blinked. "They did-" he had a moment of realization and laughed. "They were asking the viewers at home, Kids." He chuckled, confusing the three Warners.

"But the viewers can't answer!" Dot told him, perplexed. "They wouldn't have any good ideas anyways." She turned away, pouting.

Mickey sighed. "That may be true, but it's a part of our show. We need to have the children feel like they’re interacting with us."

Yakko raised a brow. "So they'll buy more stuff?"

Mickey shrugged. "Unfortunately, that's what the higher-ups want. It’s why they spell out my name at the beginning of every episode."

"What?"

"So that when parents spell out the word, the kids know what they're talking about." Mickey elaborated.

Yakko sighed, shaking his head. "Capitalism."

"Yep. Now we have to continue shooting, so if we could clean this up?" Mickey asked, to which the three Warners sighed.

Clapping, Yakko looked around. "Alright everybody! Let's wrap it up!"

Ghosts rose from the lights and paintings scattered on the walls, and began cleaning up. Once finished, they flew into a brown sack, which then closed itself.

"Welp, now that that's done!" Yakko picked up the sack with ease and threw it over his shoulder.

"Well, it's almost time to leave anyways," Minnie pointed out, looking over at the clock. "I guess we just wait for the director to call it a day?"

Mickey nodded, grabbing the lattes he put aside earlier and giving them to the rest of the group.

"So, you three are from the Warner studios?" Daisy asked as the three drank their drinks.

"Yep! Been there since 1930!" Yakko confirmed as the director came back from the bathroom.

"Weird, I never heard of you ‘til the 90s…" Minnie thought out loud, playing with the straw of her drink.

"Well, that happens when you're locked in a tower for 60 years." Yakko took another sip of his latte. "You're not really set in starlight when you're 133 feet in the air, I guess."

The rest of the cast eyed the Warners worriedly.

"Isn't that a bit…" Daisy tried to put it delicately. "...a bit personal?"

Dot shrugged. "Scratchy says we're chronic oversharers."

"I… see." Daisy sipped her drink.

"Well, I guess it's about time to get you guys back." Mickey looked at the clock. "Bugs should be done with his own filming session for now."

"But we were having so much fun here!" Dot complained, still getting up and following Mickey. The other two siblings begrudgingly followed suit, waving goodbye to the cast as they got in the car.

"Mickey, wait-" Minnie called out, before hesitating.

"Yeah Minnie?"

"It's… nothing. Have a safe trip!" She waved as they left, but she couldn't ignore the gut feeling that something wasn't right.

Something bad was going to happen. She could feel it.

Chapter Text

"Can't we just stay with you guys?" Dot pouted, sitting in between her two older brothers, both of which were equally upset. However, they seemed to be trying to hide their dissatisfaction at being brought back to the Warner Brothers lot.

"Sorry kids, but Bugs said he wanted you three back by 7…" Mickey sighed as he explained why they couldn't stay with him again.

"That's such an early curfew though!"

"Yakko, your sister’s 9."

Yakko opened his mouth for a witty comeback, but closed it. Despite his namesake and his reputation, he had no words that would let him come out a winner in that situation. Or at least, none that would let him and his siblings stay out of the Warner Bros. lot any longer.

Mickey parked his car, which was perfectly in between the lines. So perfectly, in fact, that the authors had to take a moment to talk about it, unlike the driver that parked in two spaces at Walgreens earlier. (That's right, owner of the black Ford Focus. We know your sins.)

"Alright kids, let's get going before the big guy shows up." Mickey ushered the three children out of the lot and into the studio, quickly rushing past the sleeping guard.

Yakko led the group as they made their way to the water tower. They sneaked about the lot, hiding from any security cameras that could record them running around. Mickey followed the children, not fully understanding their weird pathing but going along with it anyways. Mickey turned, noticing a particularly shiny something in the dark and walking back to inspect it.

The three children continued on. "Alright sibs, we're almost there-"

"Are you now?" The three jumped, turning to find a rather large man standing in front of the water tower. Quickly though, the three recovered and began their usual antics.

"Hello there, boss!" Yakko waved before he rushed and jumped onto the CEO. "You look great by the way! Very healthy."

"Yeah, you look nice!" Wakko jumped onto the (awful) man as well, booping his nose. "Boop!"

Dot joined in last, pinching his cheek. "Pudgy faces are all the rage nowadays!"

The CEO blinked a moment before pushing the three children off of him.
"Get off of me!"

The three Cartoonus characterus landed with a thud.

"You three have been missing since 3pm! Care to explain?" Tapping his foot impatiently, Pl*tz glared down at the Warners.

"Hey, don't worry Plotzy! I got a permit from Bugs himself!" The large man ripped the paper away from the eldest sibling, reading it outloud.

"I can do what I wan- wait a minute, you stole this from that mockumentary show!" He growled, glowering even harder at the trio.

Dot merely shrugged. "Hey, we're running out of new material! Maybe if we got a new show though..?" The three turned to the left and winked before turning back to Pl*tz.

"We don't even have cameras rolling right now! What are you three winking at?" The CEOs eyes followed the three’s quick gaze, his eyes darting around a moment after to try and find some invisible culprit.

Growling when he couldn't find anything, the CEO (derogatory) turned his attention back towards the children. Fuming, he snatched the three Warners by the scruff of their necks, holding them up in the air.

"You- You-" He threw them back onto the ground. "You're trying to distract me from your mess earlier!" The three looked at each other and shrugged before turning back to Pl*tz confused.

"What mess?" Dot asked. "We didn't make any messes, did we?" Her brothers seemed just as confused. You see, unlike in last chapter, the Warners are actually completely unaware of the havoc they have wreaked.

"The reels! The movie reels!" He growled. Obviously, it had something to do with movie reels.

The Warners collectively rubbed their heads in thought. The movie reels? Movie reels… movie reels… Eventually, The oldest one shrugged. "UuuUuuuuhh… sorry, I don't recall any monkey business involving movie reels."

“The intern confessed to it but I know it was you.”

"What."

“She’s soft on you. She tried to cover for you. But I know your game..”

Dot blinked. "On this episode of Crazy Conspiracies: the Confessed Reel Fiasco." She deadpanned, looking up at Pl*tz. "Seriously, this is getting kind of creepy."

The CEO reached towards the Warner nearest to him, that being Dot. He looked even angrier than he did just a minute ago. He was just about to say what would have surely been a menacing statement filled with dramatic irony, but alas, he was interrupted before he could even finish a word.

Said interruptor being a metallic clink sounding at his feet. Pl*tz, intrigued, looked down to see a quarter, quite noticeably shiny, on the ground, still spinning. He picked it up and looked at it quizzically.

"What in the world…?"

Looking up, he saw a figure heavily shadowed by the sun behind him. He walked towards the 4, though his attention seemed to be turned towards the CEO.

Said coward backed up slowly, his eyes never leaving the figure. "What- What are you doing here?"

He stopped.

"Well?"

As the shadowed figure stepped forward, the harsh backlighting slid off to reveal more features- not that it was necessary. This silhouette was designed for recognizability, after all.

"What'cha doing there, buddy?"

“I- Y- But- You’re supposed to be at Disney!” the CEO said, as if he had not established that already.

“What are you doing here?”

He’s said that as well. Word for word.

“Are you just gonna say the same thing over and over again?” Yakko joked, ruining the mood and voicing the author’s exact thoughts because he is an extension of them as a character in their story because it’s fun to mock people like Pl*tz for minor faults.

The piece of shit (<--change later) glared at Yakko before he heard footsteps. Turning back to Mickey, he whimpered and began to scoot backwards. Like a coward.

An elongated arm grabbed the jingling fools' throat, pulling him towards the owner of said appendage, which belonged to an incredibly angry mousey boy.

He glowered down at the CEO, still smiling.
"What's your fucking damage, you rotund motherfucker?"

The rotund motherfucker gulped, trying to get out of the toon’s grasp. He didn’t have an answer to the (likely rhetorical) question. Come to think of it, he couldn’t even talk at all. Or... breathe, really. Pl*tz started gasping, desperately gulping for air. Then Mickey remembered that there were kids present. Three of them. One’s nine. Shit.

(The kids don’t care.)

Mickey, in his belief that strangling a man is not suitable content for children, decided to stop strangling said man. The mouse turned around, looking quite sheepish, and apologized for attempting murder in front of them.

The youngest smiled sweetly. “Oh, we don’t give a $#%*” (Dot swears in canon, fuck off)

Mickey nodded, looking relieved, if not a bit unnerved by the lack of fear or concern in the young (according to the wiki anyways) children’s eyes. After looking down at Pl*tz, who was gasping for air or something- Mickey couldn’t be bothered to stare for long enough to know for certain- he spoke in a serious tone.

“Get in the car.”

The Warners looked at the mouse, then they looked at each other, then back at the mouse. This went on for some time before the oldest of the trio finally decided to actually question the mouse, who was making desperate gestures towards the Tooncar.

“UuuuuUuuuuh, why do we need to get in the Mouse-mobile?” He asked, which caused the owner of said Mouse-mobile to pause in his wild flailing. After opening his mouth, only to close it again for a few moments, he hesitantly answered the toon.

“... You ever been to Disney World?”

Chapter Text

The children and Mickey were singing songs as they made their way down the road. This had been going on for the past 3 hours.

However it was quite rudely interrupted by a certain AI with a familiar silhouette.

Mickey turned his attention off the road- almost hitting someone while doing so- to look at the usually helpful robot.

“Toodles?!”

The three Warners looked to the disk, before recognition flashed in their eyes.

“Toody!” They smiled, waving excitedly at the poor bot as if they hadn’t been missing for over 3 hours.

The helper waved at the kids before turning to Mickey.

“Minnie to-told me to gi-gi-give you a message!”

“Oh no.”

Toodles face faded out as a recording of Minnie began to take its place.

“Micheal Theodore Mouse.” the voice rang out. Mickey’s face shrunk before he heard another, just as similar voice.

“What’s up doc,” the rabbit started, coming into view.

“Where’s my kids?”

Chapter Text

The horn had been blaring for 2 minutes.
The children were getting concerned.
… Mickey wasn't dead was he?
"You're not dead, are you?" Wakko poked the mouse on the back of the head, which was lying on the wheel and causing the noise.
Mickey made a noise of affirmation.
Dot looked at her brothers. "Does that mean he’s alive or he’s dead?"
Yakko shrugged, leaning forward towards the front seat.
"If he is dead, does that mean I can drive?"

After a moment, Mickey sat back up in his seat. Sadly that meant Yakko could not, in fact, take the wheel.
The mouse took a deep breath.
"Alright, you managed to survive an entire land trying to steal your heart, you can survive an angry rabbit trying to do the same."

"Don't forget your girlfriend!"

"Yes, thank you Dot."

Mickey's head fell back onto the horn.

"I'm gonna die."

"So I can drive!"

"No-"

"I don't know," Yakko leaned on the front passenger seat. "I think I'd do a pretty good job!"

"Before or after the police start chasing you?" Dot smirked, smile widening as her oldest brother looked back at her.

"I think I could probably drive if one of you get on the ground to push the pedals!" Wakko chimed in.

"No one is driving!" Toodles flew in between the children. "It's unsafe!"

"Not even Mickey?" Dot questioned.

Yakko shrugged. "Guess we're not getting anywhere then."

So much for Walt Disney World®
… And for returning the Skeletons back to the Caribbean ride.
"Wait, is that Disney World or Disney Land?" Wakko pulled out a huge map.

"How would that map help us exactly?" Dot glanced over at her hat-wearing brother.

"It's a map of the park!"

"How'd you get that?"

"I ate it while we were at Mickey's clubhouse!"

"Well, whether or not we can return these grave-robbed chew toys won’t matter if we can't hear our own thoughts!" Yakko turned to Mickey.
Oh right. We forgot about that.
The eldest sibling pushed the poor mouse off of the wheel, face hitting the side of the door.
"Wake up old man!"

Mickey jumped. We're not quite sure whether he was asleep or if he was just super zoned out. Maybe he was having an out of body experience? Flashback we couldn't see? No matter what it was, he had come back to his senses.

"Oh, hehe, sorry kids!" He smiled apologetically at the Warners, "Just, uh, trying to formulate a way to avoid Minnie and Bugs's wrath!"

"Then maybe we should go to Disney World!" Dot elbowed Mickey. "It is the happiest place on earth, right?"

"Yeah, but that's just the tagline."

"Never hurts to pretend it's true, does it? Besides, we need to get the plot going again!"

That's not a very healthy outlook, but Dot was right! They've spent the entire chapter on the side of an empty highway!

Wait, why is the highway so empty?

A sea of cars come rushing through, the noise startling the four.

Oh, there we go.

Mickey sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "I guess you're right."
Besides, he did promise them he'd bring them.

"Alright, we should probably get going then. We've been in this spot long enough!" Mickey put his car in drive, turning on the blinker and merging into traffic- probably annoying those behind him on the freeway but it's Mickey Mouse so what are they gonna do?

"The road trip is back on!"
The children cheered, honestly just happy to be moving again.

Wakko hummed. "Can we get McDonald's?"
"I'm not sure if that would be the best idea-" Toodles began before Mickey spoke.
"Sure thing Wakko," the mouse nodded, smiling at the middle-est child via the rear-view mirror, "We can get McDonald's."

Chapter Text

If you look at a certain McDonald's on the road between California and Florida, you may see the Tooncar (Mouse mobile) parked in the lot. If you decide to venture in, you best be mentally prepared because hoo boy you're about to walk in on some bullshit.

It genuinely started out perfectly fine. Mickey parked and brought the kids into the establishment, ordered food for them all (Mickey himself getting a coffee because he's going to need the energy), and sat down while waiting for their number to be called out.
Simple, right?

Well, apparently Mickey had forgotten how the Warners are and agreed to let them go play at the patented McDonald's PlayPlace (Don't worry it's 2015 Mickey's responsible).

The first mistake of the night.

Within 10 minutes, Yakko had gotten tangled on the rope bridge and was dangling upside-down, with Dot and Wakko desperately trying to get him down by hanging on the sides of the bridge.
Mickey was currently below said bridge, just in case he fell.
How Mickey could catch him when Yakko was like twice his height wasn't really important.

Luckily, with Toodles help, they were able to finally untangle the tallest Warner, with Mickey being able to catch him before he hit the ground. Thank the stars for toon logic!

After that, The children decided to sit and wait with Mickey. That lasted about 3 minutes before they got bored and started bugging the other patrons.

"How'd you get your hair to stand up like that?"
"When'd ya find the time to get a jacket 2 sizes too small to fit?"
"So have you ever heard of how the ancient Romans made their waterway?"

It wasn't long until Mickey had quite a few parents coming over to tell him to control his kids.

Mickey wondered why the food was taking so long as he wrangled the three puppy-children back to their seats.

The puppy-children, of course, were not a fan of this arrangement. And as anyone reading this will know, when the Warners don't like something, they make sure that everyone knows that they do not like that thing.
Like cats.

So the night was going great.

No one was sympathetic for the children or the old man who was simply doing his best.

Was this how Oswald felt when he brought his kids out with him anywhere?

So now, if you were to walk into this very specific McDonald's, you would find three animated children known as the Warners wreaking havoc all over the store with the very stressed looking actor Mickey Mouse trying to wrangle them back in while the workers simply do nothing because they don't get paid enough for this.

Finally, one of the aforementioned workers call out their order number, and Mickey tiredly walks over, although he was trying to make it look like he wasn't stressed out of his mind.

"Thank you so much," Mickey smiles to the worker, who nods back before handing him a folded up napkin. Inside is the exact amount of money he had paid for their meals.

"Oh, I think there's been some mistake-"

"Listen, I'm a parent too, your shows make my kids happy, and honestly you look like you're about to snap and curl up on this place's bathroom floor," The worker smiled. "And speaking from experience; you would not wanna do that."
(Note: We are not actually speaking from experience. However it does seem unpleasant.)

Mickey nodded, "Thanks," before turning around to where the Warners currently were and calling out their names.
"Yakko! Wakko! Dot! To the table! Get your food!"
The three Warners paused. Do they dare give up their rampage for nuggies? Were the Happy Meals™ more important than their voices!? Their thoughts??????

The answer was yes apparently.
They sat down at their table as Mickey doled out their food to them.

As the three played with their toys (despite being gendered toys, they had all gotten Hello Kitty toys), it had almost seemed like they forgot about the perceived injustice against the three of them.
Thank God.

This peace was sadly broken as Wakko finished his fries. Due to his hunger, which is understandable because Happy Meals never have enough fries for some reason, he swiped one of Dot's while she wasn't looking.
Dot then blamed Yakko, stealing one of his fries as payback. Yakko would not take this injustice and stole one of Dot's in retaliation.
This went on for several minutes.

They were getting stares again.
Mickey finally stood up, looking at the three.
"Grab your stuff."
The Warners blinked, confused.
Mickey crossed his arms, waiting in front of the table. "Come on, you heard me."
He had done it. The upset parent pose.
"Wait, but why?" Wakko whined.
"You've caused trouble the entire time we've been here." He even sounded like a disappointed parent.
Oh no.
"Grab your stuff. In the car."
The three kids sighed, but did as told. Mickey was surprised to be honest, but he wasn't unwelcoming to the change. He just hoped he hadn't hurt their feelings too badly.

Chapter Text

It was currently 11pm. They were currently driving to Walt Disney World®. They could've
gotten there earlier but they had forgotten Toodles at the McDonald's and the Warners didn't believe that calling out "Oh, Toodles!" would actually work. Would it actually work? Hell if I know; I’m just writing this.
Dot and Wakko were sleeping in the backseat, somehow managing to doze off between the panicked driving. Yakko had decided to take watch- for some reason, it wasn't like they were a DnD party- and had been staring out towards the streetlights for the past hour or so.
Mickey glanced back up at his rear view mirror to look at the oldest Warner once more. He'd been driving for over 24 hours straight and honestly it was a miracle he was even able to focus right now, but he was more worried about the child who also hadn't slept in that time period.
How did kidnappers handle this guilt? This worry??
He could never.
Well… he has. But…
Yeah. You know.
Glancing to the side of the road, the mouse noticed a motel that looked like it would probably not question why a bunch of toons would show up at 3 in the morning.
Hopefully.
And with hope being the only thing he had to work with (besides the money he brought with him because he's micky fucking mouse), he pulled into the parking lot.
Yakko looked over to the criminal (Mickey). "If you need to sleep, I'd gladly take over driv-"
"We're staying in the motel." Mickey decided. He would rather die than be the one to teach any of these kids to drive.
Leave that one to Bugs.
Picking up the younger Warners (after much difficulty because Yakko would NOT help), Mickey walked into the front office.
"Heya, could we get a room?"
The lady looked up from her newspaper- "Warner toons gone missing!" Was the headline. Whoops- and blinked.
"Aren't you that Mickey guy?"
"Yeah"
She shrugged. "Fair enough." And handed him the keys to a room.
Well that was easy.
The mouse kicked open the door and laid the Warners on one of the beds before realizing he forgot to check for bedbugs and promptly picked them back up.
Uhhhhh…. He placed them on some chairs for a second and checked and THEN placed them on the- bedbug free- bed.
"Huh. Cool."
"Nothing's 'cool' about getting bed bugs, Yakko."
"I beg to differ!" Yakko jumped on the bed as well, almost knocking the other two off. "It's the hot new trend!"
Mickey sighed. "For who, Daffy?"
Yakko looked towards the left and blew a kiss.
"Good night, everybody!"
Mickey shook his head. "Good night, Yakko."
Yakko gasped in shock at the grown adult not feeding into his bullshit before laying down into the bed.
"So, Mick-Man, how bout a bedtime story?"
"You can read, can't you?"
Yakko sighed dramatically.
"But then I don't get tired!"
Mickey shrugged, satisfied with his bed not having bed bugs either.
"Maybe if you were all awake I would, but I'm not wasting my talents on someone who makes jokes like that."
Yakko gawfed.
"You made the joke first!"
Mickey paused.
"You don't know that's what I meant."
"What else could you mean???"
"Daffy never showers."
Yakko's eyes narrowed.
"Showers with Bugs."
Well that wasn't something he needed to know.
"What kind? Roaches?"
Yakko groaned
"Whatever, I'm going to sleep!"
Mickey smiled calmly at the annoyed child.
"Aw, but we were having such a fun time together!"
"GOODNIGHT."
and with that, Yakko rolled over to face away from the incredibly smug mouse, slamming his head dramatically onto the pillow and huffing in annoyance.
Mickey counted that as a win. At least he would go to sleep.