Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“I am so tired,” Brock stated from the driver’s seat as they made another left turn. He looked in the rearview mirror, “Seriously Rip, could you give us one, easy mission? Me and Vonnie are dying over here man.”

Rippen didn’t even bother opening his eyes, rather he laid further into the back seat of the car, “Look, I didn’t pick the dimension okay? I didn't want to be crazy war driven robot species either Brock.” Rippen opened his eyes, and noticed they were getting closer to the house, “Do you think perhaps Mama Z would be willing to watch Penn for the rest of the night? I’d go 50/50 on a hotel room with two beds.”

Brock rolled his eyes, but he chuckled and smiled at the same time, “Not getting out of this that easy Rippen, c’mon Penn aint that bad.”

Rippen grunted as they pulled up into the driveway, “Still, I have classes tomorrow. I’d rather be awake for those,” Rippen undid his buckle and shook Yvonne’s shoulder from the backseat, “Vonnie, we’re home, come on.”

“Never,” she laid over in the passenger seat and both Brock and Rippen looked at eachother, “Let me sleep forever.”

Rippen raised his hands up and opened the seat to the back door, “Nope, you get to deal with sleepy Vonnie. I’ll get Penn from Mama Z have fun bro bro.”

Rippen looked back at Brock who had a look of betrayal on his face. Rippen just smiled and shrugged his shoulder, then stuck out his tongue because he felt a little childish. Then he turned around and started heading towards the house, where he, Brock and Yvonne would face their greatest challenge.

Six month old Penn Zero.

Before Rippen could even open the door, Mama Z threw it open for him. She was smiling, a little Penn on her hip who was holding Freddie.

“Hey Mama Z,” He reached for Penn for Mama Z willingly gave up to him, “He wasn’t too much trouble tonight was he?”

Mama Z leaned on the door frame and shook her head, “Naw, he was fine baby,” She looked over Rippen’s shoulder at the car, “Where's Brock and Von? They leave you to butter me up or something?”

Rippen just shook his head, and grabbed Penn’s hand, “No, nothing like that we had a really long mission.” He looked back and noticed Yvonne and Brock walking out of the car, practically looking like the walking dead, “I’m going to head inside and start dinner with Penn, I think the two of them need some more time away from Penn here. I’ll see you later though Mama Z.”

But before he could walk in, Mama Z grabbed him by the arm and looked up at him, “I think you’re forgetting something Rippen.”

Rippen gave her a confused look before he chucked. He leaned down and gave Mama Z a kiss on the cheek, "I love you Mama Z, I'll see you later."

"Love you too baby," she patted Rippen on the shoulder and gave Penn a kiss on the cheek, "Now go inside and eat I ordered y'all pepperoni pizza."

Rippen gave her a thankful look, “Thanks Mama Z.” 

With that Rippen walked inside the house bouncing the excited baby on his hip. He walked to the kitchen seeing said pizza Mama Z had talked about, and Rippen couldn’t help the little skip in his step. He opened the box and grabbed a slice. Though as soon as he put the slice in his mouth, he heard the door open and close.

“Oh my god I love mom!” Brock came up behind him and took a slice of pizza too, petting Penn on the head. Once he took a bite, Vonnie took her own slice, “So what's the plan? We can't go straight to sleep Penn is still awake.”

Vonnie shrugged her shoulders, “We can put on those visual stimulation videos, he seemed to have liked them last night.” Yvonne finished her slice of pizza and grabbed Penn from Rippen, “What do you boys think?”

“I think I’ll set up the tv, Rippen could you put the pizza in the fridge?” Though before Brock could even get a response, he was already out the kitchen.

Rippen and Vonnie just looked at each other and rolled their eyes. Soon Rippen put the pizza in the fridge and Vonnie was just trying to keep Penn occupied. Once that was over the two of them walked over in the front room where it seemed Brock was almost done messing with the TV. He looked up at them smiling.

“Hey! Just finished messing with it, we can sit down now.”

With that the three of them sat down on the couch, Brock in the middle, Rippen on the left and Vonnie laying on the right. Penn was sitting in between Brock’s legs, incredibly occupied both by Vonnie’s foot and Freddie the stuffed poodle.

“It never ceases to amaze me how easily children his age are amused,” Rippen said out loud petting the boy’s hair before leaning into the couch, “Not sure if that's a good or bad thing.”

“Eh, I think he’ll be fine. Most babies are like this.” Brock said, putting both his arms on the couch, putting one arm behind Rippen and Yvonne.

Yvonne grunted in agreement, and Rippen nodded. Then without even thinking about it, Rippen felt his eyes grow heavy and he fell asleep.

The last thing he heard before falling asleep was snoring and the sound of a baby giggling…. Rippen decided he didn’t mind that much.

Chapter Text

Rippen felt his hands tremble as he looked at the body in front of him. It was a hero, he laid there, blood pooling from his side. Rippen couldn't help but flinch as muscle memory made the body twitch. The adrenaline from earlier now faded from his body, and Rippen couldn’t help but feel guilty.

“Well, would you look at that..”

Rippen jumped, clutching the knife and quickly turned around. Though he relaxed somewhat when he realized it was only his Papa. “Papa, I wasn’t expecting you, did you come with Vlurgen and Mama as well?”

His Papa just shook his head, and swirled his cup, “No Champ, I was just walking down the ally and I saw you!” Papa just whistled and Rippen flinched again, Papa walked by him and kicked the body. For a moment, Rippen felt absolute horror as his Papa kicked the body, “You did a number on this hero huh?”

Rippen blinked and stuttered and looked down at body and back to his Papa, “Yes, I overheard you and Mama talking about this hero here,” Rippen sighed and looked back down, “So... I took care of it.”

His Papa nodded, and looked back at him, “You feeling okay about that though?”

Rippen froze, “What do you mean Papa?” He gave him a hesitant smile, “Of course I’m okay with it, this man was a Hero! We’re villains, we destroy heros!”

His Papa nodded and took a sip from the wine cup, “Yes, you are correct about that…” He turned to look back to Rippen, a slight frown on his face, “But, why are you crying then?”

Rippen blinked, “What do you mean Papa?”

Instead of answering his Papa just pointed his finger to his eyes. Rippen feeling confused mirrored his Papa’s movements. To Rippen’s surprise, or not, he found his cheeks and eyes were wet. When Rippen looked back to his Papa he felt his stomach drop, his Papa only looked disappointed.

His Papa swirled the wine glass and looked back down to the body, “You know Champ, if I were you, I’d clean that up if I were you.” He looked back at Rippen, “Because your mother would be even more disappointed than I am.”

“What?”

Rippen felt his whole world shatter around, and not for the first time. He did this for them, he killed a hero for them. He took a man’s life so they wouldn’t feel bothered by the hero ruining their plans and they felt disappointed because he was crying?

His Papa patted his back, Rippen would have said it was comforting if his Papa wasn’t hitting his back so hard, “C’mon Rippen, I’ll head home, and you can..” His Papa looked him and almost looked disgusted, “And you can pull yourself together?”

Rippen couldn’t help but nod numbly, and watched his Papa walk away. Once he was out of sight Rippen leaned against the wall of the ally and started to sit down against the wall. He felt as if his world shattered and he didn’t know how to feel about it. He wished to get his parents would just feel proud of him, and for once get some equal footing to his sister.

Rippen rubbed his eyes and heaved a sigh and hid himself in his knees. At least tomorrow might be better, there was a man coming tomorrow to try and hire him for a part time villain position. At least then he can try and spread villainy across the whole multiverse, and maybe..

Rippen lifted his head to look at the dead body…. Maybe then he wouldn’t have to kill someone again.

Chapter Text

Rippen wasn’t aware of his surroundings at the moment. He was more focused on the picture he was sketching, it was another tattoo he was thinking of getting. It had been a while since he added to his sleeve and he had been itching for something new on it. It was something of a dove flying through a ring of fire, he was thinking of making the dove turn into flowers… But would that be a touch too on the nose?

Rippen sighed and rubbed his eyes, he had been working on this particular piece for a little bit now. He looked at the clock and couldn’t help but let out a little wince. He had been working on that piece for two hours now. Rippen shook his head and stood up stretching, it did him no good working on a piece for that long, he needed fresh eyes to look over that piece later if he really wanted that on his arm. 

As Rippen shook his head, he started heading to his kitchen. Whether or not he wanted to admit it, he was hungry and he needed something to eat. Though his travel to the kitchen was interrupted by knocking at his front door.

Rippen groaned and decided for a moment whether or not he really needed to open the door. But then again, his more kind side won over and Rippen begrudgingly started making his way over to the front door.

Once he opened the door he couldn't help but smile, “Brock? Penn? What brings you both to my side of the tracks?” he looked side to side, “I take it you didn't bring Vonnie?”

Brock strained a smile and shook his head, “Not today!” Rippen moved aside letting Brock and Penn in who started babbling gibberish in Brock’s arms, only some of it now understandable. Once Rippen shut the door behind them, did Brock turn to look at him, “Rippen my favorite brother!-”

“No.” Rippen stepped back, dread now filling his body. Although Penn seemed delighted by it, if his giggling was anything to go by, “I don't know what you want but no.”

In that moment Rippen knew down to his bones, he had said the wrong thing. Because as soon as he had said that, Brock still smiled and put Penn down. Penn, delighted by his new found freedom, ran straight into Rippen’s kitchen, no doubt in search of some juice. Then Rippen’s attention was snapped back to Brock, who now put a hand on Rippen’s shoulder.

“Rippen..” Brock started, and Rippen felt a cold sweat start, “Me and Vonnie haven't had a full nights sleep in weeks.”

Rippen didn’t trust his voice, so instead he just nodded prompting Brock to continue, “I love my son, I do. But Rippen, you’re taking my 3 year old for the day so me and Vonnie can have a nap, okay? Nod yes if you understand.”

Rippen nodded yes and almost immediately he saw the tension leave Brock’s shoulder and the man sagged. Rippen patted Brock on the back, “Alright, you're able to drive home, right?”

Brock nodded and smiled, “Yeah, when do you want me to pick up Penn?”  Brock looked towards the hanging clock, “Is six okay?”

Rippen nodded and started to head to the front of the apartment, “Yeah that sounds good for me,” He gave Brock a concerned look, “Are you sure you don't want him to spend the night? I can take him for the night-”

Brock waved him off though, “Naw, thank you for the offer though,” He flashed Rippen a smile, “I’ll see you at six okay?”

Rippen nodded, “See you at six, just drive safe alright?”

Brock just nodded, and Rippen shut the front door behind him. Once the door was shut, Rippen suddenly realized the apartment was quiet, too quiet. That’s when Rippen finally realized that Penn had been unsupervised in his kitchen for some time. Suddenly with renewed vigor, Rippen found himself rushing into his kitchen.

When Rippen finally reached the kitchen he couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief. Instead of Penn standing on the counter like Rippen thought the little devil would be doing, he was just sitting on the counter with caprisun in hand.

Penn smiled, “Uncle Rippy!” Penn held out his arms to be picked up, and Rippen couldn’t help but smile as he picked up the boy.

Rippen rubbed their noses together, “How's my little menace doing?” Rippen turned to leave the kitchen, 3-year-old in arms, “Because daddy said you've been a little terror.”

Penn giggled, “Nu uh! Been good! I think I mi’ get my skin spots!”

That made Rippen stop in confusion, “What do you mean? What are skin spots Penn?” Instead of answering him, Penn just slapped his arm and motioned at his tattoos. That's when it clicked in his head, and Rippen felt himself smile, “Do you mean my tattoos?”

Penn smiled even wider, “Yeah! The skin spots! I want them, an’ you get em for being good right?” Penn tilted his head to the side, and gave him a confused look.

Ripple giggled a d little bit and resumed his walk towards the front room. “No baby, but Uncle Rippen can give you ‘skin spots’. That sound good to you, Penn?”

Penn shook his head yes, and Rippen couldn’t help but laugh. He also couldn’t help but wonder how Brock and Vonnie would react to Penn having a whole tattoo sleeve, especially when they’re drawn in those sharpie tattoo pens he just bought…...

Chapter Text

He just wanted to sleep, Rippen was so tired. College, Part-Time Villainy, along with his own apprenticeship at the Middleburg school as a TA, it was a lot. He could feel himself burning out at both ends, but he knew he had to keep pushing forward, if he didn’t he wouldn't be successful in anything. He needed the money, Rippen needed to move out of Brock and Vonnie’s house, they deserved their own space. Especially with how fast Penn was growing, it seemed like only yesterday Brock and Vonnie brought the little red head home.

Rippen would never admit how much he got attached to that boy. Everyday when he came home, the baby was there, giggling and reaching out for him. Well, when he was done with his parent’s anyway, after that, Penn ran for him so unafraid and happy.

It was weird having someone so who loved him so unconditionally, if Rippen was honest, he loved it, loved Penn. Rippen didn’t know how his own mother could only see him for his own faults and compare him to Vlurgen, if Penn ever had a little sibling, Rippen didn’t think he’d ever do that. If anything he would only love them the exact same.

Rippen sat up in his bed rubbed his hand down his face and sighed, this was not what he wanted to think about right before bed.

“Bah!”

Rippen didn’t jump, he most certainly let out a little shout either, before looking down, “Penn?! What are you doing in here?!”

The baby, obviously, didn’t say anything in response, only grabbing on to Rippen’s tail. Rippen, gently picked up the baby, Penn just doing his own thing as he did. Rippen looked at his bedside clock checking the time and almost balked, it was 1 in the morning! Penn should have already been in his crib fast asleep with Vonnie and Brock.

Rippen narrowed his eyes, “You want to tell me how you got from your room, all the way to mine, you cretin?”

The cretin in question only giggled at he tried and failed to pull on Rippen’s goatee, “You’re going to be the death of me, Red. I hope you know that.”

Penn didn’t even care, he only smiled and went back to now playing with the buttons on Rippen’s sleep shirt. Rippen tried to be annoyed, but his soft smile completetly gave away how he really felt about the whole thing.

Rippen out his legs over the bed and gently stood up making sure not to loose his balance with the baby, “Well, you’re awake, I’m awake, so tell me, are you hungry by chance?”

“Dapa!”

“Yeah, me too.” Rippen started making his way down the stairs and towards the kitchen, “How do you feel about macaroni for a 1 AM snack? Your parents are saying you are loving that stuff.”

“Mac? Mamamama?”

“Close enough,” Rippen entered the kitchen, shutting the baby gate and letting Penn have run of the whole kitchen. For whatever reason, the kid had an abundance of energy. It didn’t concern Rippen though, as long as Penn was occupied long enough to pull out the pot and mac. Which luckily he did seem to be. Rippen was able to bring the Mac to a boil, so they just had to wait now.

It was when Rippen was sitting on the kitchen floor with Penn building some blocks that he heard it. Hurried foot steps, two sets of them in fact, running down the stairs. Rippen, without thinking, quickly picked up Penn and ran out of the kitchen in enough time to meet both Brock and Vonnie at the end of the stairs.

“What’s going on?!”

“Penn!” Vonnie ran up to him, grabbing the baby, all the while Brock slumped against the stairs, “Oh thank God, Rippen!”

“Is everything okay?!” Rippen looked over Vonnie and Brock and besides them, both of the young adults looked completely fine, albeit very tired.

“We fell asleep with him in bed, when we woke up he was gone.” Brock mumbled against the stairs, “We were freaking out.”

“What were you doing with Penn, downstairs?” Vonnie spoke up, looking behind him towards the kitchen.

“He came into my room…I couldn’t sleep, I figured he couldn’t either, so I decided to make Mac N Cheese, because I was hungry and you said Penn was really into Mac N Cheese at the moment?”

“Oh,” Vonnie stared at Rippen before walking by him, “I want some too.”

“I’m going back to bed!” Brock yelled from the stairs, “Night!”

Rippen blinked as he looked between Brock going up the stairs and Vonnie going to steal his Mac N Cheese. He stood there all 30 seconds before shaking his head with a small smile, while he could agree this was different from his other family, it was so much better. As he walked back in the kitchen, Vonnie with Penn on her hip and handing Rippen a strainer, he couldn’t help but think about he never wanted to leave this family.

Chapter Text

“No.”

“You don’t even know what it is yet!”

“I don’t need to!” Rippen countered, poking Brock in the chest, “When you ask me for something, it has to do with one of your mothers, I won’t be part of that!”

“It’s not that bad!” Brock whined, hanging off of Rippen’s shoulder, before the said other dimensional humanoide threw him off, “Rude!”

“Not even!” Rippen looked down at Brock, “What do you even need me to do?”

“So, you agree then?” Brock asked, smiling as he brushed his pants off.

“I agree to nothing.” 

Brock only rolled his eyes, “Look, as Mama’s favorite child-”

“Not her child.”

Brock narrowed his eyes, “Okay, well, as my Mama’s favorite friend of mine. Do you think you could keep her distracted with Ma? Just for a few hours?”

“Why?” Rippen sighed, leaning against the porch railing, “Brock, this whole time, you haven't explained once, about why you need my help. Tad suspicious.”

“Just a tad!”

“No one was talking to you Chuck!” Both Rippen and Brock yelled up to the second story window, where both teenagers could hear Chuck grumble as he shut his bedroom window.

“Your brother can be so annoying.” Rippen sighed, rubbing his temple, “Well, why would I be distracting your mothers?”

“It's about me and Vonnie.” Brock said, his cheek’s flushing, “You know?”

“No, I don’t know,” Rippen smirked, showing how he in fact, did know, “Or I wouldn’t be pushing it.”

Brock breathed in, “Look, me and Vonnie wanna have our own…Personal time, I booked the hotel and everything, but you know how Mama and Ma are!” He threw his head back, “If we do that, Ma or Mama are going to be calling us every twenty minutes asking what we're doing! Especially…Because I booked it for my birthday night.”

“Oh Brock,” Rippen gave a sly smile, “You dog, you two aren’t.”

“Look! I’m going to be twenty! I am a man, I'm allowed to do adult man things!” Brock threw his hands up in the hair, “Look, will you distract Ma and Mama after dinner or not?!”

“Sure.”

Brock sighed, “Thank you, Rippen-”

“If, you admit it was really Vonnie’s idea.” Rippen smirking, his fang showing as Brock looked at him as if he was going to throttle him at any moment, “We both know you would never come up with this stunt.”

“Rippen, I swear to god-”

“Say,” Rippen stood up straighter, “It.”

“Fine! Yvonne came up with it, then she planned it!” Brock had his hands our in front of him,like he wanted to choke Rippen, “So, will you please distract Ma and Mama while me and Yvonne do our thing?!”

“Yeah,” Rippen leaned against the porch railing, “I’ll do it, but you owe me.”

“I do not care in the slightest!” Brock screamed as he walked past Rippen into the Zero House.

Rippen only shook his head, looking up at the night sky. Maybe he could use this in his favor, finally win against the heros.

“Rippen! Ma said come inside, it’s time for dinner!” Chuck yelled from the upstairs window, successfully interrupting his train of thought “Before you say anything, she said she doesn’t care if you want to eat at home! She says you don’t eat enough!”

Rippen threw his head back in a groan. 

Chapter Text

“He’s so tiny.”

Those were the first words Rippen Zero Ghhbrhhhrnnen had ever said to Penn Benjamin Zero. The baby was laying in the bassinet next to his mother’s hospital bed, his red and curly hair already showing under his cap. He was swaddled so tight, that Rippen felt a little scared that the baby may be swaddled too tight. From where he was standing, it seemed like it was a little too tight, just like Rippen’s own grip on the bouquet of flowers.

“All babies are,” Yvonne spoke up from where she lay on the bed, “Are those for me? Rippen, you know I’m a married woman.”

Rippen only smiled softly as he walked the short distance from the doorway to Vonnie’s bed. He handed the flowers to her as he gave her a chaste kiss on the forehead, “How are you doing, mama?”

Vonnie shook her head, “Don’t you start too,” Vonnie smiled as she gently hit Rippen with the bouquet, “What do you think?”

“Of him?” Rippen looked over at the sleeping newborn, “I think he looks gorgeous, Von. You did so good.”

Vonnie just snorted, “It’s okay to say he looks like a squished baked potato, Rip. Brock is downstairs in the cafeteria, you won't get in trouble.”

“Well, I wasn’t going to say anything,” Rippen sat on the edge of the bed, “But he looks a lot like a squished baked potato.”

That made Yvonne full on laugh, once she stopped Vonnie laid the bouquet of flowers on the nightstand next to her, “There’s no going back now.”

“Definitely not,” Rippen agreed looking over the baby, “Unless you leave him at a safe haven or something, although, I have a feeling you and Brock will not be doing that.”

“Definitely not,” Vonnie scooched over, her upper body leaning on Rippen as she looked over his shoulder looking at Penn. She squeezed Rippen’s shoulder and rested her head, “Rippen, be honest…Do you think me and Brock will be good parents?”

Rippen furrowed his eyebrow in concern, his hand resting on top of Yvonne’s, “Of course you two would, why wouldn’t you be?”

Vonnie sniffed, tears at the corners of her eyes, before she wiped them away. Her eyes never leaving Penn, “Just hormones Big Green,” then she looked at him, only with gaze so serious, Rippen had only seen a handful of times, “But promise, if me and Brock ever-”

“Yvonne Zero,” Rippen moved around so they were face to face, “You and Brock will never do anything to have me tell you’re doing something wrong. You two are the kindest and some other word for kind, people I have ever met, you two will never do anything to harm that baby.”

Yvonne didn't say anything, only gave a watery smile, before throwing herself at Rippen giving a bone crushing hug, “You are truly a word smith, Rippen.”

Rippen didn’t even hesitate, wrapping his arms around Vonnie, “I wouldn’t say that.” 

Rippen was allowed to squeeze her once more before the new Penn Zero decided he was done sleeping. He very much wanted something by the sound of his ear piercing crying was anything to go by, if he had any less tact, Rippen would have told Yvonne that.

“Oh, somebody is awake. Rippen, could you bring him to me please? I’m positive he’s hungry.”

Rippen blinked, trying to process exactly what Yvonne had said. He looked at her, wanting to get some kind of confirmation, only to get her nod her head in a silent command of ‘Grab him!’, while she started to undo her hospital gown. Rippen swallowed his silent scream and started to make his way to the bassinet to the fussy infant. Penn’s cries had wound down and he was just wiggling in his bassinet like a worm. 

Ever so gently, Rippen put his hands under the babe and ever so carefully picked him up. The baby weighed absolutely nothing to him, he could easily maim the child, yet, he didn’t. Instead, against his more rational rational brain, Rippen brough the baby closer to him. Rippen couldn’t help it, it was like the baby cast some sort of spell. Then, following an instinct he didn’t even know he had, Rippen rubbed his face against Penn. It was like his brain checked out for a moment, Rippen rubbing himself all over Penn’s little body, a deep, guttural purr, ripping itself from his throat.

Penn didn’t even seem to mind, in fact, the baby responded in kind by stopping his whining. His body went practically limp while this strange man continued to purr and rub his face all over him. It seemed both man and baby didn’t register Yvonne watching, or even Brock walking back into the room. It may have been a few more seconds or a few more minutes, but soon Rippen pulled away. Penn was sound asleep in his arms, the baby acting like he wasn’t hungry just a few moments ago.

“Wow.”

Rippen jumped just a little, looked over his shoulder, Brock and Yvonne just staring at him with their stupid smiles, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Rippen quickly strode over to Yvonne, handing her the baby. Rippen never once took his eyes off the baby, even when Yvonne brought him to her chest, the greedy thing starting to suckle as if he’d never eaten before.

“I’ve only seen your purr, like, one before!” Brock replied, a smile never leaving his face, “Makes sense though, he’s gorgeous isn’t he?”

Rippen resisted, rolling his eyes, “Yeah, he is.”

“You’re going to be his uncle.” Vonnie piped up, “We think that was appropriate.”

Rippen felt his eyes bulging out of his head “Excuse me-?!”

“You’re excused,” Vonnie replied, “You’re his Uncle Rippen, better get used to it.”

As Brock began to laugh in the background, Rippen knew, there was no getting out of this. Vonnie’s tone left no room for argument, so he did the only thing any man could do in that situation and replied with, “I suppose so.”