Chapter Text
Ellie climbed into her father's bed, worn out teddy in tow. Little lips trembled as her big eyes betrayed the monsters beneath her own linens. Her pajamas had words on them she could not yet read and held meanings she did not yet understand.
The warmth trapped beneath perfectly folded covers dissipated as it was forced to battle cold air. Ellie didn't care. Ellie didn’t know better than to wake a grown up who had things to do in the morning. She didn't understand the concept of a career or paying bills. Ellie just needed her daddy.
Groggy and unable to see much more than a blond headed blur without his new glasses, Light pushed himself up just enough to get a glimpse at the night time imposter. “El's?” He asked, still wincing like it would do him any good. Damn getting older.
Soft curls of hair brushed beneath his arm and Light turned on his side, arms open as he received his little girl. He smiled and tried not to laugh as she buried her face into her teddy. “Nightmares?” Light asked gently as he wrapped his arms around her.
She nodded, sniffled, then looked up at him. “When is daddy coming home? I miss him.”
Light didn't have an answer for her. “I miss him too.” The truth was that L might not be coming home this time. At least, not immediately. And while both Light and Ellie ached to see their family whole again, Light had to do right by their daughter. If L didn't get better… if treatment didn't work…
Divorce was an ugly word but maybe it was fitting because it was ugly. Everything was ugly right then, Light thought as he held onto the only thing that made sense to him anymore. Get better and come back to us, Light silently prayed as he kissed the top of fat curls and made his little girl feel safe again.
When her breathing changed from shallow to the deep, relaxed breathing known only to those in a comfortable slumber, Light finally relaxed his body and gave in to sleep too. Everything would be okay. It had to be.
***
Ringing phones twisted the pit of his stomach in a new way each time. He thanked God for caller ID and anti anxiety medication. And he thanked God twice for the toddler throwing oatmeal at his face, snapping him out of his mental panic. “Ellie! You silly girl!” Light laughed as he smeared the warm goo across his face. It was the closest thing to a facial he'd had in years. Light gave Ellie “the look" and she giggled sheepishly, holding her spoon to her nose as her plump cheeks turned bright pink. “Daddy is calling. If he is having a good day, I'll let you talk to him, okay?”
Ellie smiled and nodded and placed the spoon back in her bowl. She listened intently as her father accepted the call. She would know by the way her father spoke whether or not she'd get to talk to daddy today. Did he hang his head low? Worry his brow? Did he speak quietly and glance over at her, concerned she could understand what he was saying and knowing she was too young to hear it?
“Is Ellie there? Can I talk to her?” Were the first words out of L’s mouth.
“You have to talk to me first, okay?” It pained Light to say it, but he couldn't have L saying bizarre shit to Ellie.
“Oh, okay. I see,” L said quickly, quietly. Paranoia still laced his voice.
“L, do you know who this is?” Light asked, closing his eyes and hoping and praying L recognized his voice.
“Light?” He seemed unsure, over thinking the question and second guessing himself.
Light breathed out a sigh of relief, “Yes, it’s me. I miss you.”
“I miss you too. I don't know when I'll be let out,” L explained, slowing down in the way he spoke. “I'm sorry.”
“It’s okay, L. Just get better, okay? Did you get the clothes I sent you?” Light asked.
“Yes, I did. Thank you,” L paused, afraid of saying the wrong thing. “Will I be able to speak with Ellie today?”
“Sure, she's right here. Let me give her the phone,” Light said as he turned to their daughter with a big smile.
“Daddy!” She cheered into the phone. “Daddy I've missed you!”
“I miss you too sweet pea. Have you been nice to your father since I've been gone? You know he needs your help around the house since I'm not there.”
“Yep!” Ellie said cheerfully into the phone. “I put my toys away all by myself yesterday.”
“Wow, that's impressive, Ellie Belly! I'm so proud of you. What else have you been doing?”
“We painted pictures for you with our fingers. They’re on the fridge for when you get home.”
“I can't wait to see them,” L became quiet as a voice in the background mumbled something to him. “Hey baby I have to go now. I love you.”
“I love you too daddy,” Ellie said. L was cut off from saying anything more and the line went dead.
Light reached for the phone, counting down in his head from five. Just as predicted, Ellie burst into tears. Light lifted her from her high chair and comforted her. It was the worst feeling in the world knowing he couldn't do anything to help his little girl. “Sh, baby girl. Daddy will come home soon, okay?”
Ellie hugged her father and sniffled into his shoulder. “Ice cream would make me feel better.”
Light laughed. She was indeed her father's daughter.