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Hold the Light

Summary:

You’re a wildlands firefighter who happens to be dating Bucky Barnes. Sometimes, things don’t go to plan.

Notes:

Find me on tumblr: jbbarnesnnoble.tumblr.com

Work Text:

You had become a Wildland Firefighter with the National Park Service out of college, just before you met Bucky Barnes. You spent half the year on the west coast in a permanent seasonal position. In the offseason, you had work around the Avengers compound. It worked out for you. The compound had its own fire department because the grounds were so vast with different buildings. 

 

It was nearing the end of a relatively quiet season when the fire broke out. Containment had been difficult with the weather. The winds weren’t in your favor. You were talking to Bucky before heading out for your next shift. Facetime, he had decided, was his favorite invention of the 21st century.

 

“Be safe,” he said.

 

“Buck, I think you’re in more danger going on this mission that’s “classified” than I am going out to do my job today. The winds have died down overnight. We’ll get this thing contained today, chief thinks,” you said. He sighed.

 

“I worry about you, doll,” he said.

 

“I know. Listen, I’ve got to get going. We’re due for shift change in thirty minutes and with how much we’ve been working, we can’t be late. I love you,” you said.

 

“Love you too. Call me when you get off. Even if I can’t answer,” he said.

 

“I will,” you told him. Brody gave you a look as you hung up with Bucky. He knew you’d lied to Bucky about the conditions. The winds had worsened in the night and there was no chance of containment barring a miracle. Your crew was heading into the thick of it, trying to mitigate damage and hopefully find survivors of a camping trip that hadn’t been heard from since the fires broke out. 

 

“You know he can just check the news and find out you lied, right?” Brody asked.

 

“Not where he’s going. He was on the quinjet. Only enough signal for calls. Non-essential usage of the internet isn’t allowed. Steve would throw a fit,” you said.

 

“So you lied why?” Sasha asked. You sighed.

 

“He needs to focus on his job and I need to focus on mine. Let’s roll, chief will be waiting and we need fresh legs out there,” you said. 

 

Your arrival on scene included another debrief on the weather conditions. The winds weren’t working in your favor and were going to make it more dangerous. You’d been around long enough to know that it was the kind of day where lives could be lost in the blink of an eye. 

 

Your team headed out into the wilderness, You scanned the horizon, smoke in the distance. If the wind shifted, your team would be in imminent danger. The campers had been cut off from getting out at the main road. The only way out was a steep climb down that even the most experienced hikers didn’t attempt. You could only hope you weren’t too late, that the smoke hadn’t overcome them. 

 

“Last known location of the campers was about a mile southwest. If the winds shift, we’re screwed. This is the only chance chief thinks we have at evacuating the campers. The overnight crew managed to contain this area but with the weather that might not hold,” you said. 

 

“They don’t call us the Magicians for nothing,” Brody joked. It had been a running joke since your second wildfire season. Your crew somehow always managed to pull off rescues under the worst of conditions, conditions that admittedly, you shouldn’t have gone into a couple of those times. You loved and hated the nickname for your crew at the same time. The underlying message was clear. If the Magicians couldn’t do it, no one could. 

 

“I hate that nickname,” Sasha lamented. You laughed as your crew headed out. A haze settled over the part of the campgrounds you were in, the smoke lighter than it had been since the fire started. If the campers were still alive, there was no way they were at the campsite. It would have been overcome with smoke throughout the previous day. The fire had quickly spiraled out of control from the time it was reported two days earlier. 

 

“Hey Blue, think we’ve got eyes on the campsite,” Brody called from up ahead. You rolled your eyes at the nickname. It stemmed from a cookout, three summers prior, where you ended up with a face full of blueberry pie. The nickname stuck, shortened from Blueberry to Blue over time. 

 

You scanned the site, looking for any hints at where they could have gone. You found a stuffed bunny on the ground beside a set of footprints. You picked it up, looking at it for a moment, hoping that you could reunite it with its owner, that you could find them, alive and well. 

 

“Looks like the ground was soft enough for footprints headed further southwest away from the fire...well, away from where it was the other day. We follow the tracks. Daniels, let command know we have a lead and where we’re headed. If the winds shift, we’re in trouble,” you said, looking toward Ryan. You had a good crew. Brody, Sasha, Ryan, and Bryce were the ones you were closest too. The five of you were the ones the rest of the team depended on when things were dicey. 

 

“Should we really pursue the lead?” Sasha asked, worry laced in her tone. You sighed. 

 

“I don’t know about you, but I’m not about to let people die if we can get them out. We all knew what we signed up for when we took this job. As long as it remains safe to do so, we’re pressing forward. They put us on this for a reason. If we can’t do it, no one will,” you said. 

 

“My dude, you’ve been spending too much time with Captain America...you heard the woman. Let’s roll,” Brody said. 

 

Anxiety settled in the pit of your stomach, as if it were a siren screaming about impending danger. But you pressed on, the stuffed bunny firmly in your grasp. You walked for what felt like hours, finding more tracks. You found the campers, looking exhausted, a mile and a half to the southwest of the camp. Winds had shifted in the course of the morning and you could see the smoke rolling in.

 

“We’re going to get you out of here,” you said. A family of five, the youngest around three. Brody took the youngest from her exhausted father, making sure the toddler was safe and secure. 

 

“Blue,” Sasha said. You could feel the direction of the wind shift. If you didn’t get out fast enough, you would be in trouble. 

 

“I know,” you said. You had a limited window to get them out. Fire spread fast and the winds didn’t help. You could hear the crackle of fire in the distance as the smoke thickened. It wasn’t long before you hit an area where the fire was burning. 

 

“Alright, we’re about a half mile out from command. We’ll be fine,” you said. You were doing your best to stay calm and composed. You heard the creaking of the trees. Some of the trees in the area had been marked for removal that had yet to occur. You heard the snap, moving instinctively  to push the others out of the way as the heavy branch came down, hitting you in the head. You crumbled to the ground, the yells of your team distant as you drifted into unconsciousness. 

 


 

“Sergeant Barnes, I have an urgent message for you,” FRIDAY said as the team disembarked from the quinjet at the compound. The mission hadn’t taken long at all. He’d be able to call you that night once your shift ended. He felt his heart drop at FRIDAY’s words.

 

“Go ahead,” he said.

 

“This is Chief Andrews calling for James Barnes,” your chief’s voice came. Bucky froze as he listened to the message. 

 

He dropped everything, racing to his room, throwing on civilian clothes and grabbing a go bag. Steve had followed closely behind.

 

“You’re not going alone,” Steve said. Bucky nodded as they reached the jet. Steve took over piloting as Bucky sat staring out the window, worried about what awaited him out west. 

 


 

You were in and out as your crew moved to get the branch off you. The smell of smoke grew heavier.

 

“We can’t move her, not without a board,” Sasha said. 

 

“We don’t have time to get a team out here. The winds are shifting. If we don’t get a move on, we’re not getting out of here,” Brody said.

 

“What do we do then?” Ryan asked.  

 

“There’s another sturdy branch over there. Deploy your fire shelter and get the cord. See if you can find a third branch to help keep her flat. We can make a stretcher. We need something to stabilize her neck. We don’t know the damage done and we need to minimize making it worse,” Brody said, shifting into crisis mode. Bryce and Ryan went to get the branches while Sasha deployed a fire shelter. She knelt beside you.

 

“We’re getting you out, Blue, promise,” she said. 

 

“We need to call into command if we can,” Brody said. Sasha nodded as she unclipped her radio. 

 

“Magicians to Command, do you read, over,” Sasha said.

 

“Go ahead,” Chief Andrews said. As the others worked, Sasha relayed the information to command. You were still drifting in and out, your head throbbing. 

 

“Keep your eyes open, Blue, come on,” you heard Brody say. You felt tired. You were in pain and you were tired. You just wanted a nap. 

 

The next thing you knew you heard a commotion as you were transferred to a real stretcher with a neck brace. 

 



Bucky was pacing the length of the waiting room. With the quinjet, he and Steve had arrived sooner than they would have otherwise. You were in surgery to deal with a break in your arm and an injury to your shoulder. According to the doctor, you had been lucky to avoid a spinal injury. As it was, you had been in and out of consciousness en route to the hospital and likely had a concussion. Preliminary tests had shown you avoided a major brain injury as well. 

 

“Buck, sit down,” Steve said, yanking his friend into the seat beside him. 

 

“I don’t want to sit,” Bucky replied, moving to stand up before Steve pulled him back down, bracing his arm across Bucky’s torso as if restraining a toddler. 

 

“Pacing won’t make things move faster. She’s stable, Buck. They’ll call us when she’s out of surgery. Right now, all we can do is wait,” Steve told him. Bucky sunk low in the chair. Was this how you felt any time he got injured on a mission? He began thinking of all the ways to make it up to you, the times you must have felt like he did in that moment. And all the times he brushed it off. 

 

The doctor emerged some time later. Bucky was staring at the wall in front of him, counting the specks that dotted the color. 

 

“She’s resting in her room now. Her surgery went well. She’ll be out of commission for at least three months, with physical therapy to regain the majority of her range of motion back in that arm. We won’t be able complete our testing until she’s awake, but we believe she has at minimum a low grade concussion,” the doctor explained.

 

“What does that mean for her?” Bucky asked.

 

“There is a potential for some memory loss, but we don’t expect that in her case. However, we won’t be able to rule that out until she wakes up. She’s a very lucky person today,” the doctor said. Bucky knew what the doctor wasn’t saying. You could have been killed by that branch. You always seemed to have a sense about things and luck when it came to your job and escaping those situations. Bucky wouldn’t be surprised if you had some kind of power or powers you were unaware of, but that was a discussion for later. Now, now he had to go see you, be with you.

 

Steve stood with Bucky, but didn’t move to follow him to your room after the doctor told them where to go.

 

“I’ll go make the phone calls. Go see your girl,” Steve said. Bucky nodded before heading in the direction your doctor had indicated. 

 

He took a moment to collect himself before opening the door to the room. You looked peaceful laying in the bed. But fragile. Fragile was never a term he would use to describe you. You were far from a delicate little doll. No, you were strong, a fighter through and through. You may not go to battle with aliens or battle Hydra, but you were still a hero. You ran toward danger. You saved lives. Seeing you there, it reminded him you were still mortal. You weren’t impervious to injury. 

 

“Gave me a scare, doll. You and I are going to have to have a long talk about withholding information,” Bucky whispered gently as he took your hand in his. He watched the rhythmic rise and fall of your chest as you slept, waiting for you to wake. 

 

He had fallen asleep by the time you woke up. You looked over at him, a soft smile on your face, before squeezing his hand and drifting back to sleep. There would be plenty of time to talk in the morning.