Work Text:
He could feel the familiar burn in his lungs, ragged roots crowding his insides. A part of him wanted it to stop but he knew that no matter how many times he tried to carve these budding flowers out they just seemed to grow back. For someone like him who could not die he would just have to keep suffering. Wade was in love, he long since tried to deny it, tell himself it was because of horniness and loneliness that drew him to the closest person to him. That he was just longing for the chemical high that sex provided but that wasn’t it. It was stronger that wanting to fuck it was a feeling that stretched beyond those carinal desires. He was in love with his laugh, he was in love with the way they could go back and forth and be in each other’s presence in silence without feeling awkward. He loved the way he smiled when he lifted his mask up to his nose to eat and how happy he felt around him. He was so happy that he had trusted Wade enough to tell him his real name.
He was in love with his best friend, his friendship with Peter meant a lot to him, it meant more to him than making things awkward between them if he confessed. He sat alone in his crappy rundown apartment, usually at this time he would be patrolling the city with Spidey but he was having a particularly bad episode and couldn’t bother to move from his slumped position on the bathroom floor except to scoot over to the toilet to puke.
Hanahaki Disease, an illness born from one-sided love, only one in a hundred people experience it. It appears in people who believe that their feelings being returned is impossible, the only way to remove it is to fall out of love with that person which is easier said than done or to get it surgically removed but along with the flowers being uprooted so will your feelings for that person.
Just the other night he was having fun, him and Petey were hanging out at his house after a long night of kicking butt and taking names, he had challenged Peter to Mario Cart on his switch he had bought just for Peter’s visits. They laughter echoed off the walls, they liked playing dirty, flicking each other, elbowing, poking, and in his case tickling Peter when he got too far behind after being hammered with turtle shells. They often broke out into shouting matches, flinging senseless curses at each other whenever they bumped into each other on the track.
They sat shoulder to shoulder smushed together on his cramped couch, Wade could feel the intoxicating warmth of Peter’s body against his side. In the heat of the match, he could get lost, focus on winning the race and less of the brush of Peter’s costume covered shoulder against his or the bubbly feeling he got when he tickled Peter’s side, a part of him in those moments just wanted to wrap his fingers around Peter’s slim waist and pull him close.
In the moments when they would pause briefly between matches to grab a slice of pizza, he could not stop his wandering thought, his thoughts were not of the sexual kind, they were soft snuggles wrapped in large fluffy blankets and watching terribly bad rom-coms, they were the exhilarating moments in combat when they just knew each other so well that they were in complete sync. He craved Peter like an addict craving their fix, but unlike an addict his fix would never come. And as it reached the morning hours Peter would say his goodbye, pulled his mask back down before swinging off. It was wonderful nights like those that lead to terrible days like this hunched over his toilet bowl vomiting flowers.
It was ok though, wonderful days like that was worth the pain that followed. The more he thought about it, the more he drew into himself the more painful it got but unlike a gunshot wound or electrocution, the things he had learned to grow numb to this was the one type of pain he couldn’t numb. Once he tried drowning out the pain with ungodly amounts of booze, when drinking didn’t work, he would rely on his trusty pistol to find at least an hour of piece. But he got tired of cleaning the blood splatters and got tired of cleaning up the empty bottles so he stopped. Let himself suffer without attempting to numb it, grin and bear it, the only thing he couldn’t stop was when he asphyxiated, when the flowers became too much and he would be choked out by his own body.
Those moments seemed to happen more and more lately, if he were normal, he would have died a long time ago. Because he couldn’t die, he was instead left to wait out that painfully long process, it left him incapacitated for at least a good 3-5 hours. He was just outside the restroom when he started choking having pushed himself up to get water for his parched throat but he only made it to just outside the room before the episode started. He couldn’t do more than take one more step in vain before he felt himself falling forward and blacking out.
He woke up to his body being shook and a panicked voice, he felt groggy, he was completely out of it and it took him several minutes to get ahold of himself. It was dark and as his eyes slowly adjusted and he came to his senses he realized it was Peter, or more accurately it was Spiderman crouched beside him, his hands tightly gripping Wade’s bare shoulders, it was that moment he realized he had been out for a lot longer than he had ever been and that he was in only a pair of loose sweat pants and he felt disgusted with himself that Peter was touching his molting shoulders and how could he subject Peter to his grotesque appearance. He couldn’t bring himself to push Peter away, his strong touch was just too comforting; too warm against his deathly cold skin.
“Hey there Spidey Baby whatcha doing here? I feel so touched you would grace me with your presence, did you miss me that much?” He stated dramatically with a goofy smile plastered on his face as he tried to act like he wasn’t having a mental break down. “Wade do you have any idea what day it is, how long you have been dead for?” Peter asked meekly. He could hear how tired Peter sounded. “Come on it couldn’t have been that long” Wade stated clinging desperately to his joking persona. He could feel Peter’s gaze through his mask, could feel his grip tighten almost painfully before taking an audible breath and loosening his grip just a bit. Peter mumbled so softly that despite their close proximity he couldn’t hear him. “How may?” Wade asked unsure if he really wanted to hear the answer. “You weren’t answering or responsive for Three fucking days you idiot” Peter replied harshly, even if he couldn’t see his eyes behind the mask, he could feel Peter’s glare pierce his very soul.
“Three days! Well, I guess that I beat my record from the time I was blown up into tiny pieces, I woke up regenerated a day at most” He stated lightly and Peter went deathly silent before swiftly wrapping his arms around Wade into a tight hug his masked face buried in the spot between Wade’s shoulder blade and head. This sudden extensive skin to skin tight spandex contact caused Wade to completely blank out, it was too much and yet not enough and as he sat awkwardly holding himself up with his hands, he was afraid of wrapping his arms around Peter like he wanted to. “Do you know how terrified I felt when I came to check on you and the house reeked of blood, you weren’t answering my messages, you were missing for days, I’ve been trying to wake you up for hours, you weren’t breathing, you were just laying here on the ground face down in a puddle of blood and petals and you just wouldn’t wake up.” Peter stated gasping between hiccupping sobs that wracked his body. Wade could feel tear-soaked fabric against his shoulder, he could hear the rasp and desperation in Peter’s voice. Suddenly he felt terrible for trying to make light of his temporary death.
“I-I’m sorry Petey, I’m sorry I scared you like that.” He spoke softly as he lifted an arm to wrap gently around Peter’s shaking shoulders, Peter wasn’t weak, he was smaller than Wade in height but after years of watching him he had filled out, he was still fairly skinny but he had the muscular physique of an athlete, he had seen more than his fair share of Peter taking out men much larger than him with the grace of a dancer but in his arms like this Peter looks so small, so fragile. “Please,” Peter began, “Please tell me when you’re hurting, could you please tell me who’s hurting you like this?” he asked in a hushed tone. Wade was at a loss for words, funny how often the notorious murk with a mouth because so utterly speechless in the presence of this boy. “I can’t Petey, I don’t wanna mess this up more than I already am” Wade replied. Peter lifted his head from Wade’s shoulder and pulled himself away enough to look Wade in the eyes. “Wait what do you mean?” Peter questioned between sniffles. “It means that I- that I care too much about our friendship for me to ruin it over my silly feelings” He replied, he already said too much, the tension was thick and heavy in the air.
Peter was silent, probably processing what he just heard, “so you like-” he paused, “But why couldn’t you-” he fumbled over his words. Wade to a shuddering breath before speaking up, “I didn’t want to scary you away” Wade went from shouting to a soft broken whisper in moments like this Peter could see how fragile Wade was, how emotionally defeated he sounded. “Wade take off my mask” Peter blurted out suddenly. Now it was Wade’s turn to reel back. “Take off your mask? but Pete-”, Peter cut him off; “You are showing me your all; the least I can do is show you my face.” Peter replied stubbornly. Wade was hesitant, he didn’t know if he was ready for this, it was the one topic they stayed away from, he had always assumed that Peter would eventually show his face when he was ready but now that he was ready Wade felt completely out of his depth.
He pushed himself to sit up more then began lifting his shaky hands for the bottom of his mask. It felt like time was going agonizingly slow, he seen and felt himself moving in slow motion. Wade began lifting it up inch by inch, Peter sat deathly still; by the time he lifted it to the tip of his nose he squeezed his eyes shut, he let himself lift it more until he felt the brush of curly locks graze his hand and the mask was completely removed. He opened his eyes slowly and staring back at him were the most gorgeous eyes he had ever seen, they were a multitude of hues, more than brown. They were hickory, an earthy hue, they held the warmth of a blanket on a cold winter day; they were home. His curly brown locks framed his face, his cheeks were peppered with freckles and a blush that was a lovely shade of pink, his chapped pink lips slightly open staring back at Wade like he was starstruck; like he somehow held the world in the palm of his hands. He felt the urge to lean forward and kiss Peter deep within his very core, His expression morphed from awe to a smile so wide and beautiful it was Wade’s turn to be in awe. Peter made the first move, leaning forward and placing a tender kiss to his forehead. That left Wade in even more shock. “But why?” Wade asked in utter confusion.
“It’s because I love you too.” Looking in his eyes Wade could see so much love and he felt himself feel overcome with emotion and covered his face as he began to cry. “Shit, look at me” he cursed to himself and began chuckling softly, “I can’t believe I confessed to you covered in my own blood and vomit, not even in the kinky way”. Wade felt his mucus run down his chin to mix in with his tears, he knew he was an ugly crier he couldn’t quite believe that Peter could love someone like him, he who despite his over-the-top persona didn’t think very highly of himself, he who killed so many; he was a broken man. He sensed before he felt the light touch of Peter’s hand cupping his cheek. “I for one still find you beautiful mucus and all”, Peter whispered to him with a look of fondness. “How about you go washup and I’ll clean up the mess.”
“Aww can’t we just stay like this and cuddle?” Wade whined not wanting to leave Peter’s side afraid he might be imagining the whole interact due to the pain sure wouldn’t be the first time. “No can do, I will not be cuddling with someone covered in blood.” Peter explained but Wade still didn’t want to go.
“Go on the faster you take a shower and I clean up this blood is the faster we get to be able to cuddle” Peter reasoned looking at him and Wade just couldn’t bring himself to complain when he was being looked at with Puppy dog eyes and the promise of hugs so he slowly pushed himself up grumbling still but determined none the less.
“ok I’ll start the shower up you go grab some cloths” He told him and Wade had to admit he liked when Peter took command. Looking back, he seen Peter’s face heat up and thought to himself had he said that out loud? “Yes, you did now go on” Peter replied to him and seeing Peter’s face flushed from embarrassment and realizing how easy it was to make him feel flustered caused a fluttering laughter to burst out followed by a string of coughs and the remembrance that his voice was still very much sore despite his healing factor.
“Are you ok?” Peter asked standing closer to him and placing his hand on Wade’s arm gentle as if to offer a sense of support. “Yeah, the good old healing is taking a bit to kick in can’t really blame it with the shit I’ve put myself through, honestly not a fan I can’t be going around being called the merc with a mouth and be silent I’m not from the Wolverine movie with no mouth” Wade stated jokingly with a more whispered tone, while confused Peter said nothing of the last part just focusing on the rest.
“Ok how about I add ice chips and water to the list while you take the shower, do you need any help?” he asked. “only if that help includes washing my back” Wade replied with a wink and a teasing smile. Peter rolled his eyes not being able to stop the smile on his face. “Well, it seems you’re ok enough to flirt so begone” Peter stated with shooing gesture. “Ok ok I see when I’m not wanted, already trying to get rid of me” Wade stated dramatically but began heading to his room with no further complaint that followed. He grabbed a soft Black t-shirt; a random pair of boxes and his prized Hello Kitty pajama bottoms he had gotten from the X-man’s Christmas party he was most certainly invited to and totally didn’t crash during their pink elephant game. Heading out he could hear the squeak of the shower turning on moments before Peter exited and smiled at him before making his way towards the kitchen area to probably find something to clean up the mess with.
Wade made his way to the shower ignoring his reflection in the bathroom sink because he had enough self-deprecation for today and thankfully only had to wait a few minutes before the shower got warmer and he stepped in, letting the heated water wash over him he stretch out his muscles hearing them pop back into place as he stretched. Along with the easing tension of his joints he began to feel however a small pain returning to his side not giving him much time to prepare before he began violently hacking. The pain even more excruciation than before this was different, his legs were weak with each painful gasp and cough, he couldn’t stop them from giving out he sat in the shower curled in on himself.
He didn’t know how long it went on but he couldn’t breathe his head was pulsing ears pounding loudly he didn’t even hear or register when Peter barged in and turned off the shower, didn’t register when he went from being hunched over to being soothingly pat on his back in reassuring caresses nor did he register the whispers of encouragement that he would pull through. He didn’t hear any of it, but he felt it, he felt the love and reassurance even when the words themselves became foreign and his skin felt numb in his pained state. When it finally had ended something felt different inside of him, he felt lighter, though his throat was in the most pain it’s been in a long while; he had felt nice inside like what had crowded his lungs had detached itself.
The flowers had finally detached and he felt less shitty than he had felt in a long time. Surrounding his seated form in the tub was bloody roots and full bloomed flowers, the bloody viscera of the flowers that had taken residence in his lungs now laid before him disgusting and yet beautiful in a disturbing sort of way clumped at the drain of the tub. His vocal cords were shot, and for the minutes it took for his insides to heal he just took in breaths, Peter was crouched infront of him tears running down his face. They stared at one another Peter moved his hands to cup Wade’s face, his touch was gentle as he then rested his head against Wade’s and they sat in silence.
They sat in that peaceful silence even as Wade was once again covered in his own blood, now stark naked he could feel Peter’s warm breath against his lips and the heat that seemed to radiate off him like a furnace. When Peter spoke, it was a whispering tone “Are you ok?”, he asked and Wade realized he was actually ok, he felt a sense of piece wash over him it was nice. “Yeah” he croaked his cords now mostly healed. “Good” Peter replied and pulled away from Wade enough to look him in the eyes, Wade could see the love in his eyes and he felt a bubbly sort of feeling in his chest one that wasn’t accompanied with painful acidic burns.
“Are ok to stand now and rinse off the blood?” Peter asked softly, hands still resting on Wades face tenderly stroking his cheeks with his thumbs. Wade nodded he was at this point healed but allowed Peter to help him up anyway not wanting to lose that warmth for a little longer. Standing now in the tub and Peter turned to leave Wade wanted him to stay a little longer, “Hey Baby boy why don’t you join me, promise I won’t bite” Wade stated flirtatiously lowering his voice an octave before he continued “not hard anyway”. He found Peter’s initial response adorable his cheeks turning a pretty red that reached the tips of his ears his hand flew up to cover his face before muffling a response Wade couldn’t hear. “What was that baby boy?” Wade asked.
Peter reluctantly uncovered his face, “Maybe I want you to bite hard” he squeaked out once more before quickly rushing out the room and shutting the door behind him leaving Wade to be embarrassed. Wade felt his body heat up it felt electrifying buzzing tantalizingly through his body. A tingling heat settled in his lower gut and he quickly finished washing up letting the now cold water run down his body. After he finished, he quickly cleaned up the mess in the tub the water washing the blood off the plant that had until recently been firmly rooted inside his lungs. He picked up the flower unsure of what to do with it he wanted to throw it away but all the same he found it difficult because it symbolized his love. After much debating however he decided it would be best to throw it away better to leave that sadness behind him finally.
He quickly brushed his teeth before stepping out into the hallway, he seen that Peter had managed to make quick work of the blood that was previously splatter across the ground, he could hear the sound distant sound of clanking sound of two glass cups bumping into each other. The old wooden floor boards groaned and creaked under his feet as he walked to the living room and connected kitchen, from there he could see Peter in the kitchen back turned to him as he was seemingly readying two cups of tea. “Take a seat I’m just adding the honey to your cup of tea.” Peter stated without turning around from this distance Wade debated for a second before slowly making his way to the kitchen as quietly as possible trying not to let his bare feet slap against the kitchen tile. Peter’s Spidey senses often didn’t work for Wade and he loved using that fact to scare Peter to his delight and Peter’s dismay. This time however he used this to his advantage to sneak his arms around Peter’s waist and wrapping in a hug from behind as he heard Peter suck in a gasp of air. “Wade! Don’t sneak up on me like that!” He shrieked.
Wade simply leaned forward and gently planted a kiss on the back of Peter’s neck feeling him shudder against him in response he didn’t respond to Peter’s shock just snuggle into him further his chin resting on Peter’s head. Breathing in he could smell the lingering scent of sweat and the faint smell of blood that clung to his suit possibly from earlier events but underneath he could smell something soft like Lavender, Wade wasn’t sure if that was from his fabric softener or shampoo or if it was just entirely Peter but he liked. “Come on Wade I’m sweaty and gross and I was cleaning up blood, I need to take a shower first before hugs.” Peter stated gently tugging at Wade’s grip around his waist. “No can do I need to charge up first besides I think you smell so good already,” Wade replied obnoxiously proving his point by tightening his grip and purposely making a very loud sound like he was sniffing him which caused Peter to break out into a boisterous giggling fit.
They both know if Peter wanted to, he could easily get out of Wade’s grip using his super strength but he didn’t and simply settled to beg Wade instead between gasping breath. “Come on Pretty please?” He pleaded and Wade decided to take pity on him. “OK have it your way since you asked so nicely, you can borrow some of my clothes if you don’t have any, there is a spare pack of tooth brushes under the sink, you can grab one if you want to use it” Wade stated letting go and leading Peter to the room so he could find some clothes that would fit him.
Peter was a bit smaller than him, Where Wade’s muscles were on the bulker side of the spectrum from years of combat and training Peter had the body of a gymnast, he was strong and yet light. Wade debated what of his cloths would fit him as they would undoubtable be looser on his frame especially around the shoulders he wasn’t to worried about the pants because they had drawstrings. He ended up handing Peter a pair of Black sweats and one of his softer long sleeve crew necks that was a rust color and tried not to think about how cute he knew Peter would look with paw sleeves because of their length.
Peter planted a small kiss on his cheek before turning to hurriedly walk to the rest room leaving a once again flustered Wade. “I’ll won’t take long; don’t forget to drink your tea, it might be a bit too hot still I like mine colder anyway but I’ll try to hurry” Peter called out to him over his shoulder as he retreated but all Wade could do was think to him self as he smiled giddily that Peter was going to be the death of him again.
Ten minutes later and six minutes after the tea was cool enough to drink, he sat on the couch scrolling through movies on Netflix, he could hear the shower turn off followed by the sound of the bathroom door creaking open and closing after a few more minutes. He could hear the soft creak of footsteps padding down the hall and coming towards him. He turned to see a pretty sight much like how he predicted the shirt was loose his collarbone was visible and the sleeve covered his hands, the bottom of the sweat pants where bunched up at his feet in a messy fold, his hair was fluffed up like he ruffled up with the towel while he dried it.
“Like what you see” Peter teased with a little smile on his lips as he moved to lean against a wall his words taking Wade out of his thoughts. “God yes” Wade stated breathing out, he was mesmerized Peter looked back at him the air felt weighed, this was actually real, he knew that it was and yet still felt had to remind himself that it was.
They went about getting more snacks from the fridge the tea was chilled at this point but they didn’t mind as the sat down together side by side arms and thighs touching and shifting against one other. They settled on Stardust and let it play as they sat and watched enjoying each other’s company, after some time they started bickering not with any malice just the playful type of banter about anything and everything that they had grown accustom to; breaking the silence that both where afraid to end.
“I can’t love you anymore, I am absolutely appalled” Wade stated overdramatically posing like those old damsels in distress holding the pose for a few minutes before both of them broke out into a fit of giggles and laughter. “R- Really you would break up with me just because I haven’t seen Princess Bride?” Peter stated between wheezes. “Why of course you have offended my honor” Wade replied unable to stop himself from smiling widely when he was trying to sound serious. “Well then, I guess we will have to watch it next, so I can restore your honor now won’t I” Peter teased with a mischievous smile. It was only now that they realized they had shifted, instead of sitting side by side they were now facing each other.
Slowly before Wade could even realize his actions, he moved a hand to caress Peter’s cheek, they looked into each other eyes before Wade leaned forward finding Peter’s lips. I wasn’t his first kiss and it wasn’t Peter’s but to them it felt magical. It was soft and leisurely like time was infinite and this moment would never end. Wade loved the slight pressure the burn of peppermint toothpaste, he felt Peter’s hand gripping at his shirt holding them together. He swiped his tongue along Peter’s before pulling away to kiss his freckles, kissing each and every one thinking about how long he wanted this how painful the it was but he was ok with it now. This tender warmth felt like something Wade hadn’t felt in a long time he felt unguarded and yet he felt safe like home.