Chapter Text
Dave picked you up from the airport, twirling you around furiously when you ran to hug him. He looked the same, if a little taller- blonde hair, a casual posture and pretty scarlet eyes- wait. For as long as you can remember, Dave has strictly kept his glasses plastered to his face. He refused to remove them even around John for years. What had changed that he was suddenly comfortable without them in such a public place? All at once you became aware of the expression on his face, watching you with furrowed eyebrows.
“You’re not wearing your glasses.”
Dave’s expression clears, an easy smile growing across his face. “Yeah. No more Stiller shades hiding this perfect bone structure. Most of the time, anyway. How was school, Hermosa?”
You chatter through the car ride to Dave’s flat, falling into the teasing banter that had always made you feel so comfortable. He tells you about Rose’s new girlfriend, Kanaya, and his photography, and all the new kids he’s met, and you’re happy for him even as your insides twist because you should have been there, you should be part of his life and you should know his friends. He seems to notice your regret, and loudly insists that you’re going to love them.
And you do, mostly. Terezi is spunky, fiery and alive in ways you know very few people to be. Kanaya, as Dave described her, is quiet, and fiercely intelligent. Vriska is cunning… and the only one you don’t like. You’re not going to make an effort with bitchy, backstabbing, business majors, and Dave doesn’t particularly enjoy her company either, so you feel perfectly justified in that decision.
But then there’s Karkat. He’s hotheaded, argumentative, and really kind. All of his traits clash in a way that makes your head spin, but he’s not bad, per se. Confusing, yes, you could even describe Karkat as strange. But at the same time he’s fun, likeable. So why can’t you bring yourself to like him?
You introduce yourself as “Jade, Dave’s girlfriend,” the same way you greeted everyone else, and it turns out that Karkat is Dave’s roommate. You swap embarrassing stories, and Karkat complains that Dave’s “Dead Things Collection” takes up his space, so you tell him how you started that collection. His response of “Thank god, someone to blame for Strider’s insufferable habits” puts a wide smile on your face, and Dave watches the two of you with a soft expression. And yet something ugly curls in your gut. You push yourself to hang out with all of them, and you meet computer science expert Sollux, his archeology enthusiast girlfriend Aradia, Gamzee (who you think is Terezi’s boyfriend? Dave doesn’t know and Karkat made an extremely noncommittal noise when you asked), and Feferi, a pretty marine biology major with an extremely rich family. She invites everybody to a Christmas “get-together” that you have a feeling involves a lot more alcohol than the name implies.
Gradually, you forget about your adverse reaction to Karkat. You see him more when you pick Dave up from his dorm, and when everyone hangs out at the park, or at Rose’s apartment. You learn that his degree is nursing, that he eats his food ridiculously spicy, and that Kanaya is apparently his cousin. Dave steals his cigarettes, and laughs as Karkat chases him to steal his lighter back. Dave almost always ends up wedged in between the two of you, leaning on your shoulder with his feet on Karkat’s lap. The more time you spend around both of them, the more confused you get because now you know him, you want to like him. You think Dave notices your discomfort, but you refuse to acknowledge that it exists at all.
It’s making you miserable.
The day of the party arrives, and the three of you drive to Feferi’s house (although you’re inclined to use the word mansion) with Rose and Kanaya. Kanaya and Karkat run you through everyone else that will be there: Eridan, an econ major described fondly by Karkat as a “stuck up prick”, Nepeta, Karkat’s younger step-sister (“3 months younger, Karkat” “Still younger, cousin dearest”), and Equius. Neither Karkat nor Kanaya seem to know him that well, and reassure you that he will likely spend the entire evening with Nepeta anyway, so you probably won't need to interact.
You arrive and Karkat is immediately tackled by a tiny blonde girl who you assume is Nepeta. The smile on his face is beautiful, a wider, softer version of the smile he gives Kanaya. It puts a smile on your own face, and for once you don’t notice the ache in your gut telling you to hate him with every fibre of your being.
The party gets into full swing, and you spend most of it chatting to John (John! God you’ve missed him), and talking to Feferi and Eridan (who you will admit is a stuck up prick, but is also pretty funny) and Feferi is the perfect buffer to counteract the awkward moment fuelled by the fact that you don’t have all that much in common.
At some point you leave to get another drink, and pass the balcony on your way to the kitchen. It’s a lovely house, with minimalist but homely furnishing and it’s very Feferi. You take a peek to see who’s sitting outside.
Dave and Karkat are sitting side by side, Karkat’s legs pulled up to his chest with a glass in one hand and the other tucked under his chin. Dave’s legs dangle through the railing, and his beer is standing precariously on his thigh. The smoke from the cigarette in his hand curls in the dim light, and the image has you relax, because your boy looks so content. His glasses rest on his forehead, and karkat says something quiet to the air over the pool. Dave turns to look at him- and your heart nearly stops. Oh. You know that look.
The ugly feeling from earlier comes back full force because Dave, your stupid, oblivious, lovely boyfriend is absolutely smitten with the prettiest boy you know. And you also know that he has absolutely no idea. Dave is well known for being emotionally clueless, and you’re positive that this is no exception.
You’re angry. With him, with yourself and with Karkat. But you can’t bring yourself to blame them. They looked happy, and lord knows Dave needs more of that in his life. You’re not going to say anything, you need Dave to stay with you.
You grab a sprite, and head back towards Feferi and Eridan. You go back to the conversation as if nothing has changed, and you laugh with the others when Sollux and Eridan drop the pretense of hating each other to perform a drunken rendition of All I Want For Christmas which ends up sounding like a sea shanty rather than a Christmas Hit. Dave comes back in and wraps an arm around your waist, holding mistletoe over your heads and pressing a kiss to your cheek. Nepeta and Aradia coo at the two of you from their seats around the room, and you can feel Dave’s grin against your skin. It’s so easy to pretend that you’re celebrating the festive period with your friends and your boyfriend, and it’s an easy moment between you all. It is so easy to pretend that nothing has changed at all.
But for you, everything has.