Work Text:
“Nee-Nee…”
Harmony shifted, snuggling closer into Granarchy’s side. There was a sniffling noise, almost a whimper, and a shaking by her knee. She grumbled and tried to pull her blanket over her head, but the shaking just got more insistent.
“Nee-Nee…” the little voice came again, a little louder – but not much. Enough that Harmony could recognize it, and she groaned as she cracked her eyes open.
“What, Mellie? M’sleepy…” she whined, rubbing at her eyes. She stopped, blinking with her arm hovering above her head, when she saw her sister. She slowly sat up as Mellie blinked large, watery eyes at her. Her face was red and pinched, the tell-tale signs of an absolute Meltdown only added to by the sniffles and gasping, whining breaths she was trying to hold in with tightly pursed lips. Her favorite stuffy – a snake pillow that was almost as long as she was, its teal tail trailing by her feet – was clutched in her shaking fist. Her hair… “Mellie, what did you do?”
“Ma…Ma…Maman’s gon’…be…soooooo…maaaaad…” Mellie gasped.
She…she wasn’t wrong.
Because Mellie’s shiny, black, shoulder-length hair was…knotted. Sticking up at all angles. And littered with at least two…three…five…ten pieces of gum.
Harmony carefully scooted away from Granarchy, stopping as she gave a grunt and snore (and farted in her sleep, ewwwww) and scratched at her side, but once she had settled Harmony hopped off the couch. She reached out to touch Mellie’s hair but stopped, her hand hovering above the first piece of gum. She didn’t know what to do. Maman and Papa were gonna be so mad. And not just at them! Because Mellie did it, but Harmony should have been watching her, not taking a nap – and Granarchy was napping, too! And Granarchy was the one who gave them the gum in the first place! But Granarchy didn’t tell Mellie to chew it all and stick it in her hair…but Maman and Papa were going to be mad, and there was going to be yelling, and Harmony didn’t want them yelling at Mellie or her or Granarchy, and…and Mellie was starting to cry in earnest, so Harmony grabbed the hand rubbing at her eyes and bolted towards their bedroom before Mellie could do something even stupider like wake up Granarchy.
The first of the tears fell when the door slammed behind them.
“What did you do, Mellie?!” Harmony cried, circling her to find there was even more gum in the back. Mellie was crying so hard she couldn’t speak, which wasn’t really helpful. It was just making Harmony want to cry, too. Her hands hovered awkwardly, half-raised in a hug. She wanted to give her a great big hug and tell her it was ok, that it wasn’t really that bad, they could totally fix it, but she was all too aware of how sticky that gum was and how long her own hair was and how likely the gum was to get stuck in her hair if she did. She reached up and patted the top of Mellie’s head, pushing out a frustrated breath. “S’ok, Mellie. S’ok.”
“S’noooooot,” Mellie whined, pushing her face into her stuffy and screaming. Harmony’s head snapped up to the door, but she didn’t hear Granarchy coming.
“Shh, shh, shh!” she hushed, slapping her arms. “Shut up, Mellie! You’ll wake Granarchy!”
“I…want…Mamaaaaaan,” Mellie cried, but immediately seemed to change her mind. Her face scrunched even worse, more tears falling. “She’s gon’ yell at meeeeee…”
“No, she won’t,” Harmony said, even if they both knew she totally was. Her eyes darted around the room, but she wasn’t seeing anything that could help her fix Mellie’s hair. If only she had…that was it! “Mellie, stop crying, ok? We’re gonna fix it!”
“Buh…buh…but…” Mellie sniffled, and Harmony grinned at her. She glanced at the gum sticking threateningly in Mellie’s hair and decided it was stupid. She could fix her own hair, too. Her sister needed her, so she pulled her close for a quick, tight hug and smacked her lips against her forehead in a kiss. Mellie was smiling when she let her go, at least – and the gum didn’t get in her own hair!
“Trust me,” she said. “I’ll be right back. Don’t move.”
Mellie hugged her stuffy tighter, small whimpers still escaping her, and Harmony went back out in the hall. A quick peek into the living room saw Granarchy still snoring on the couch, her head tipped back and mouth open and glasses crooked on her face. As quietly as she could, Harmony snuck down the hallway to Maman and Papa’s Work Room. They weren’t allowed inside unless Maman or Papa was there, and even then only with their permission, but desperate times called for desperate measures. Besides, she was going to be quick – like Ladybug! Maman would never know!
She was in and out in less than a minute, her prize pilfered from Maman’s desk and clutched in her hands as she snuck back down the hall to her room. When she got back inside, Mellie was still clutching her stuffy, but she was also sucking her thumb. She had stopped crying, at least.
…except when she saw what Harmony was holding, Harmony was pretty sure she was going to start all over again.
“Nee-Nee…!” Mellie gasped, her mouth dropping open and her thumb hovering in front of it. Harmony raised the shiny red scissors, a look of determination on her face.
“We have to, Mellie,” she said grimly, her mouth set in a firm line. Mellie’s lips wibbled with the threat of another cry, but she stayed put. Harmony pursed her lips and picked up the lowest piece of gum, considering. How would Maman cut it?
“…Papa’s gon’ hate it,” Mellie whimpered. “Papa likes my hair.”
“Well, why’d you put gum in it, then, you dummy?” Harmony huffed. She raised the scissors, and Mellie whimpered again.
“I didn’t mean to!” she whined. “There were so many colors, and I wanted to try ‘em all, but then the paper fell and it landed on my head and I just made it worse ‘n worse ‘n worse…”
“…the different colors don’t taste any different, dummy,” Harmony sighed. “They all taste like strawberry.”
“Well, I know that now!” Mellie sniffled. Harmony raised the scissors, finally sure which angle was best to attack this problem from, but Mellie jerked away before she could snip. “My hair!”
“I have to, Mellie!” Harmony insisted. “I can’t get it out without cutting!”
“Yes, you can!” Mellie cried. “You can do it, Nee-Nee!”
“No, I can’t, Mellie,” Harmony sighed. She grabbed the piece of gum closest to the edge, secured the rest of her hair, and gave a sharp tug that had Mellie screaming. She rolled her eyes and dropped her hair. “See?”
“That huuuuurt,” Mellie sobbed. Harmony lifted the scissors again, and Mellie shoved her face back into her stuffy so she wouldn’t have to see it. Harmony lifted the piece of gum again, making a face when it stuck to her fingers, and took a steadying breath as she raised the scissors. She lined them into place, closed her eyes, and snipped.
Just in time for Mellie to jerk away again.
“You wasn’t looking!!!!!!” Mellie screamed. Harmony winced when she saw what she had done: the gum was still in Mellie’s hair, and it was hanging in a jagged cut by a few stubborn strands. “Nee-Nee, you s’pposed to look!!!”
“I was looking!” Harmony huffed, but Mellie made another little strangled, whining scream and stomped her foot.
“You was not!” she said. “You closed your eyes! You wasn’t looking!”
“Ok, ok, ok!” Harmony sighed, holding up her hand. Mellie whimpered some more when she held up the straggling piece of gum and hair. “I’ll look this time, ok? See?”
She snipped again, her eyes firmly locked on Mellie’s hair, and frowned when the gum fell to the floor. The cut…was not very even. And the scissors had snagged on one of the other pieces of gum near the end of the cut, so they came away…sticky. Maman was gonna be so mad. She took another deep breath, cut the scissors at the air a few times to practice, and snipped at the next piece. It fell to the ground, too. The cut was also a bit more even, except now there was an obvious chunk of hair missing from Mellie’s head. She bit her lip (an unconscious gesture her Papa would tease her for, because she got it from her Maman and he thought it was cute) and studied the hair still framing Mellie’s face before she made her next cut. That was…kinda better?
Except that was when Mellie glanced at the mirror hanging on the back of their closet, saw her reflection (saw what Harmony had done to “fix” her hair), dropped her stuffy, and screamed.
There was a crash in the living room and the sound of heavy boots thundering down the hallway, and Harmony stepped back with both hands raised high above her head just as Granarchy burst through the door.
“What th’blazes is going on here?!” Granarchy roared liked the pirate captain she was, and Harmony quickly hid the scissors behind her back – but not quick enough for Granarchy, though, whose eyes narrowed on her. “Harmony. Where the devil did ye get those?”
Because Granarchy knew there were no scissors in their bedroom. Even if Maman and Papa trusted Harmony with the little yellow ones she used at her craft table (always under supervision) and sometimes the bigger ones Maman used at her craft table (…always under supervision), Mellie couldn’t be trusted with scissors yet, and as long as they shared a room the scissors were always kept up high and away and safe. So things like this didn’t happen.
Harmony’s eyes dropped to her feet. She scuffed her socked toes against the carpet and didn’t answer, which only made Granarchy madder.
“Harmonika Sabine Couffaine,” she said, her voice commanding. Angry.
“M-Maman’s desk…” Harmony mumbled, but Granarchy had known Aunt Jules before she Got Loud, so she’d heard her clear as a bell. Granarchy stomped over to her and held her hand out expectantly. With the scissors safely in Granarchy’s hand, piercing eyes turned to Mellie.
“And what be yer excuse, lass?” she demanded. Mellie’s wails had tapered off to sniffles the minute Granarchy had burst into the room, but the second she realized Granarchy was looking at her now her eyes ducked beneath her hands again and she started crying harder.
“Mellie, stop being so dramatic,” Harmony sighed in a perfect imitation of their Mamie. That was apparently the wrong thing to say, though, as Granarchy shot her a Look before crouching down beside Mellie.
“Shhh,” she cooed, putting the scissors on the floor so she could rub her arms. She picked up the stuffed snake and held it out to her, and Mellie immediately grabbed it and stuffed her thumb back in her mouth. “That’s a lass. Now, what happened here?”
“I-i-it was an ack…acc…axe-dent,” Mellie sniffled. Granarchy snorted and flicked at one of the pieces of white-pink gum still tangled in her hair.
“I see that,” she said. “Melodika, ye know ye weren’t ta have th’gum unsupervised.”
“But I wanted to try all the colors!” Mellie whined. “I didn’t mean to get it in my hair! And Nee-Nee was just trying to help, but –”
“Shhhh, shhh,” Granarchy sighed. “Peace, lass. I know. Nee-Nee’s a good sister, aye?”
“The bestest!” Mellie cheered, and Harmony tried not to smile too big at that. Granarchy pushed out another breath as she considered Mellie’s head.
“Oh, yer Papa’s gonna be livid, t’be sure,” she said. She picked up the scissors and heaved another sigh, shaking her head. “I’m so sorry, lass, but ye’ve left me no choice. The whole lot has t’go.”
“Nooooooo,” Mellie whined. “But Papa likes my hair!”
“Aye, and he liked yer Maman’s hair, too, before she cut it,” she snorted. “He’ll get over it. Now, c’mere. Let’s get ye sorted, aye?”
She pushed herself up before scooping Mellie up and dropping her on her hip. She gave Harmony a pointed look and jerked her head, indicating that she should follow. She quickly picked up the two pieces of hairy gum from the floor and jogged after them towards the bathroom. She dropped the gum in the trash while Granarchy arranged Mellie on the counter by the sink.
“Now, I’m gonna fix ye up real good, aye? And yer gonna tell ol’ Granarchy how this happened,” Granarchy said, sorting out Mellie’s hair and raising the scissors. Mellie was still whimpering, but she seemed a lot better now that Granarchy wasn’t actually yelling at her. She snuggled her stuffy and watched as clump after clump of tangled, sticky hair fell away. Harmony sat on the toilet and swung her legs, listening as Mellie tried to explain how the gum had ended up in her hair. It was the same story she had told Harmony earlier: she had wanted to try all the different colors of the gum Granarchy had given them earlier, thinking the six or so colors were different flavors, except they hadn’t been. And she’d stuck every chewed piece on a paper, so it wouldn’t make a mess, except then she’d noticed how pretty they all looked on the paper, and she’d thought Maman would like a pretty picture, so she kept chewing – but then she’d knocked the paper over, and it somehow had fallen on her head, and some of the gum had come off, and…and now here they were, with Granarchy snipping away at her hair like she was gonna cut it all off.
And it honestly was an accident, except Harmony couldn’t help thinking it was an accident that was all her fault. Mellie had been on the couch with them when they’d fallen asleep, and Harmony had honestly thought she was going to take a nap with them. She should have known better. She should have stayed awake and stopped this. At least Mellie wasn’t crying anymore. She even seemed a little excited, oddly enough, the more hair Granarchy cut away. Maybe ten minutes later, Granarchy slipped a bright red headband into Mellie’s hair and declared her job done.
“There ye go,” she said, ruffling the short curls. Harmony tugged on her own hair, which reached a little past the middle of her back and was as straight as her Maman’s. Mellie looked so different. “What d’ye think, lass?”
Mellie scrutinized her new hair for a good minute, turning her head this way and that to see it from all angles. It was maybe only an inch or two long now, shorter in some places than others, but Granarchy had done a good job at…at…what had she called it? Something about feathers? She’d given Mellie feathers, so it looked like the haircut had been on purpose. And Mellie looked awesome, because her hair was curly like Papa’s when he didn’t put that gunk in it, and the headband kept it out of her eyes, and she finally looked up at their Granarchy with a great, big, toothy smile.
“I look like Maman!” she cheered, pleased. Granarchy chuckled and ruffled her hair again.
“No, you look like Papa,” Harmony said, but Mellie stuck her tongue out at her.
“Papa has a tail,” Mellie said, sounding very certain, and Granarchy made a funny little noise that sounded like choking. She slapped a hand over her mouth and gripped the counter with her other. “I don’t look like Papa.”
“He has a ponytail, dummy,” Harmony sighed, because a ponytail wasn’t the same thing as a tail, and Mellie should know that. She was three, not stupid. Except when she was. Mellie’s face scrunched.
“That’s what I said,” she huffed. Granarchy kissed her forehead, chuckling.
“Ye both look like Couffaines,” she said, winking at them. Before she could say anything else, they heard the front door open.
“We’re back!” they heard Papa call, and Mellie looked scared again as she looked at Granarchy. Granarchy just tossed her another wink.
“Go on,” she said, patting her knee. “I’ll clean up here an’ handle yer Papa.”
“Ma-Ma-Maman…” Mellie whimpered as Granarchy lifted her off the counter.
“Her, too,” Granarchy tutted. “Go on. Go see yer brothers.”
Harmony took Mellie’s hand and led her out into the hallway, just in time to crash into their Maman. Maman’s eyes snapped open as she caught herself on the bathroom door, her gaze locking on Mellie’s new, unexpected haircut.
“…did…were…were we planning a haircut?” she asked, looking up at Granarchy – except Granarchy was still cleaning up the gummy bits of hair on the counter, and Maman’s face turned a funny shade of reddish-green when she saw the mess. “Melodika Anarchy Couffaine –!”
“Oh, hush,” Granarchy tutted, waving her off. “Tell her she’s a bonnie lass and be done with it.”
“Oh, of course she is!” Maman snapped. She dropped to her knees and brushed a hand into Mellie’s hair, the other squeezing her shoulder. “You’re beautiful, sweetheart. I’m just…surprised. I wasn’t expecting Granarchy to cut your hair.”
“Ye’ll be glad I did when I tell ye why,” Harmony heard Granarchy grumble, and she glanced over her shoulder to see Granarchy waving the pilfered scissors at her. She looked back in time to see Maman shoot her a look, but then Maman opened her arm to Harmony and waved her closer. Harmony crashed into the hug, snuggling close and making Mellie squeal that they were squishing her.
“I’m just trying to figure out why Granarchy used scissors when she could have used peanut butter,” Maman grumbled, and Harmony squirmed uncomfortably as she waited for Granarchy to rat her out. She deserved it. She…
“Tch. Ye know peanut butter only works half th’ time,” Granarchy scoffed, and Harmony felt herself relaxing. “This be quicker.”
Maman sighed and pulled them closer.
“Hey, where are my…oh,” she heard Papa say, and she peeked up from Maman’s shoulder to find he was blinking at Mellie’s ducked head. Huey and Louie were in his arms, both sleeping. Mellie peeked up at him, too, and wiggled.
“I look like Maman now,” she said, and Papa chuckled as he nodded.
“You certainly do, songbird. Both gorgeous,” he said, smiling at them. He nodded at Maman. “I’m gonna put these guys down, and then I fully expect welcome home hugs. Ma…we’re talking later.”
“Tch, watch it, b’y,” Granarchy said, dropping the gummy hair in the trash. She leveled the scissors at Papa. “Or Harmony’s next.”
Harmony gasped and grabbed at her own hair, and Granarchy winked at her. She hurried out of the bathroom after Papa, clinging onto the end of his shirt. He looked down at her when he pushed the twins’ door open, a smile on his face.
“So…you wanna tell me what happened with Mellie?” he asked, but she shook her head. With the twins in their cribs, he knelt down and ruffled her hair. She giggled, and he chuckled as he shushed her when one of the boys made a noise. “You’re not gonna scare Papa with a surprise haircut, are you?”
“No, Papa,” she said, shaking her head. “I like my hair.”
“I do, too, but you are my little ball of Chaos, right?” he teased, kissing her forehead. “I wouldn’t be surprised by this point.”
“Papaaaaa!” she whined, and he shushed her again when Louie fussed some more. He scooped her up, hugging her close as they went back out into the hall.
“Easy, easy,” he laughed. “We don’t want to wake your brothers. I love you, Harm.”
“Love you, too, Papa,” she said, snuggling into him. She wondered if she could get back to her nap, now that the crisis with Mellie’s hair had been averted and Maman and Papa were home…
– V –
Granarchy took the full blame for what had happened, saying that there had been an accident with the gum and it had needed a little snip – but one snip had led to another, and Mellie liked the haircut anyway, so what did it really matter? They were halfway through dinner when Mellie ratted her out, the little snitch, and said that Harmony was the one who had cut it crooked in the first place. Neither of them got dessert that night, but Harmony heard her parents laughing in the hall after they tucked them in for the night.
“She is so your daughter,” Maman laughed. “Chaos incarnate. Worse than Harm ever was.”
“She’s our daughter,” Papa said. “You were the one who wanted to have another one.”
“You were the one who didn’t say no,” Maman said. “Twice.”
Their voices drifted off until Harmony couldn’t hear them anymore, and she smiled as she snuggled into her pillow. At least they weren’t too mad with them…
“Nee-Nee?” came the quiet voice from the other bed once Maman and Papa were gone, and Harmony sighed.
“Go sleep, Mellie,” she grumbled, but Mellie didn’t go back to sleep.
“I’m sorry I told,” she said. “I love you, Nee-Nee.”
Even if she was still a little mad at Mellie, she smiled. She was more mad at herself, anyway. Even if Granarchy had promised it wasn’t her fault.
“Love you, too, dummy.”