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That evening, we had set aside our dinner and excused ourselves from the Prince of Ithaca, going back to the solace of our shared bed. The night was cold but it bothered me none. Atsushi lay on the bed, locks of silver hair that looked like it’s woven from moonlight itself falling on his handsome face, eyes that resembled the dusk and dawn- skin as pale as the soft light of the moon against the ocean’s surface. For a moment, he looked like a God- immortal and mighty. Except, I was reminded of the prophecy and his aforementioned demise. I look away.
“Ryuunosuke,” he spoke. “What are your thoughts of these men that we will meet?”
“I do not know.”
Atsushi was silent, then; “We will know soon enough.”
Soon enough . It rang in my ears unpleasantly. “Mhm, soon enough…” I reply.
The air around us had gone still, quiet. It is inevitable that we are thinking of the forthcoming war- it is just natural...for a soldier and warrior. Later, the soft patters of the rain against our tent roof can be heard, a faint cold breeze brushing against our hair and skin.
“A storm...as Dazai had anticipated.”
The storm will only just be temporary. Tomorrow it will leave, and the sun will be gracing us with his light again- hot and searing. Atsushi shifts, facing me, touching the long locks of my hair, and admiring the tips that had turned as white as snow.
“Your hair,” he brushed, fingertips sending sparks against my skin, setting my nerves on fire. “They are as dark as the night, and your eyes...they are the color of a storm, yet, as calm as my mother’s sea when she is at peace.”
His eyes are blazing but soft. “I do not think...I ever told you how much I like them.”
The feel of his fingers lingered ghostly. “No, you have not,”
A chuckle. “I should have.” His hand traveled down to my neck, to the pulse that came from the fiery beat of my heart. “How about this one? Have I told you?”
“No,” I said softly.
His hands traveled further- to my shoulder, to the curve of my collarbone then to my chest. Warmth spread across my skin and the beat of my heart doubled. Mayhaps, he can feel it. “Surely I have told you of this?” his voice was gentle, faint, and only for me.
My breath hitched. I can feel the heat rising on both of my cheeks. “That...you have told me.”
“This?” he spoke so softly it was almost a whisper, not that I mind. His hand rests on my hips, tracing down the side of my thighs. I shivered lightly, my skin blazing and chest pounding from his mere hands alone. “I have spoken of this, did I not?”
“You have.”
A curve of his lips, a warm fond smile. “And this? Certainly, I did not forget this, right?”
“You did not.”
“And this,” his hand was flagrant, but I did not care. My legs trembled slightly and my heart was a raging storm. “I know...I have told you of this, Ryuunosuke.”
My eyes flutter shut, my hands finding the warmth of his skin- fingertips brushing against his silver hair delicately... fondly . I opened my eyes again, only to stare at his dusk colored orbs that overflowed with desire like a strong torrent in a thunderstorm.
“Tell me again. Remind me of it, Atsushi.” I said.
After, Atsushi sleeps beside me. The rain grew heavy and the wind intense against the fabric of our tent. I hear the fall of the rain against the ocean, the waves sloshing against the shore like the goddess of the sea is mad with fury. Or maybe she is weeping...for she cannot stop his beloved son’s unfortunate end.
Atsushi stirs, his breathing steady and soft. He smells of something sweet, as he always is. I tucked the long strand of his silky silver hair behind his ear and I felt like lamenting with the gushing rain.
When he is gone, moments like these in my memory will drive me to insanity. I will yearn, and yearn, and yearn.
How much time do we have?
I stared at his serene beautiful face again. I drift to slumber with my heart ablaze with pain, desire, and sorrow.