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Russia was home to beautiful traditions, captivating music, warm foods, and working people. By far one of the most dazzling and famous Russian customs had to be ballet. The art and skill of dancers, men and women, moving flowingly to the sounds of the orchestra, being able to tell a story, and give the audience millions of emotions by just moving their bodies, doing beautiful jumps and glides in Russia’s most famous theaters. Natasha didn’t have the fortune every other Russian girl did, who had families to visit famous Ballets and enjoy the music and rich foods of Russia. Natasha instead grew up as an orphan child, dreaming of finding a place to belong, wanting to know if she too belonged to a family who’d cook and enjoy traditions from across her home, much alike a historical story of the Russian Czars lost daughter, Anastasia. The day Natasha found a home it wasn’t anything like what she’d dreamt of or wondered about many nights, it was less magical and more dull, sometimes scary and puzzling. The Red Room was nothing like something out of a little girls fairy tale, nothing at all. She grew up instead into an academy of skilled young women, who were once young, inquisitive orphan children like herself. The Red Room taught the young women to kill, hunt, lie, target, and be un attached all while being flawless, quiet, and graceful, just like a черная вдова. Natasha like very few others, learned everything quickly, making her one of the best in her class. From picking up languages and their accents, to the best way to handle a weapon, and how to hide in plain sight, she learned it all, and well. But the one thing The Red Room taught the young girls, the one thing that came true, from young Natalia’s childhood was being able to learn the act and skill of those graceful ballerinas she’d heard about once upon a time. The Red Room taught the girls to dance just as skillfully and gorgeously as the ballerinas in the cities and it was the one thing that made Natasha feel normal, and free. On the days she’d return from filthy missions, killing targets, flirting and lying into bed with men to get intel, dancing was the one thing that kept her mind at ease. She’d take out the stress, and anger and blood she’d spilled into every step of the dance and it made her forget for just a moment, It made her think that she was human too.
Even years after The Red Room and being recruited by S.H.I.E.L.D, that part of Natasha’s past never left her. She’d become busy with ops and missions, trying to redeem herself for all the bad and anger she’d caused, and when she’d returned home, (wherever it was) filthy, and tired, and feeling empty, she would take out her stress and anger onto punching bags or focused it on other files of missions, being that she was never really able to get good rest. Dancing however wasn’t very common for her as it used to be, but on occasion, she’d find a spot in the room spacious enough to twirl and glide, put on her ballet slippers and feel alive and free again.
After the fight with Loki and the other Avengers she went home and danced, because after that day it was something she’d needed badly. Dancing for Natasha wasn’t an act of celebration but an act of freedom, remorse, and yearning, yearning to feel anything other than what she felt that day. Her dancing wasn’t something anyone really knew about, apart from Clint who happened to have found her slippers once when she stayed at his farm house with at the time pregnant Laura, who was expecting baby Lila, and their young boy Cooper. She’d threatened that if he told anyone about it she’d cut of his fingers, Clint laughed it off knowing that’d she’d grown to fond of him and his family to do that. After the chaos of the falling of S.H.I.E.L.D and the rise of Hydra from the shadows, After hiding out from them with Steve and spending that time with him getting to understand him better and him her, she had danced when it all ended. She had been shaken up from it all and needing to find a new identity to hide behind after revealing herself to the world, it was relieving and familiar to know that she still had ballet.
Once at the Avengers tower on her floor, which Tony had kindly enough given each of them, She came back from a long mission she’d gone on with Steve, It being now that he was her partner on missions, not that she minded, on the contrary Steve was great company and she felt safe with him, she trusted him, just like he did her, which she’d never believe she would learn to do again. Steve and her got along the best anyone could, making each other laugh when they had time or letting each other feel a sort of comfort when needed, And teasing him, which was by far her favorite thing to do. That day on her floor after she’d settled herself back in she had been dancing and twirling in a room she’d made use of by turning it into a secret dance studio, only for her to see and know about. She’d lost herself in the soft orchestra playing on the radio, being so focused that she hadn’t even heard when Steve entered her floor in search of her, following the music that led him into the room with her dancing figure. He’d stood there in the doorframe as still as a rock, not knowing what to say or if he should interrupt. He had been lost for a second in her captivating dance, never could he have imagined that she could move so effortlessly and calmly, unlike her focused and cautious form on the field. There he saw a side of her not everyone saw. Natasha had eventually noticed shortly after, feeling a pair of eyes on her which caused her to stop abruptly and stumble over her feet.
“I-I am so sorry Nat.. I should’ve knocked I’m sorry, I came to ask for a file, I didn’t- I had no idea, here let me” Steve said panic in his voice, reaching out to help her stand
Natasha looked at him and shrugged him off
“Steve it’s fine, I’m fine I can stand alone.” She said getting back up on her feet and dusting off her leggings.
They looked at each other for a minute in silence, not knowing what to say.
“I didn’t know you danced” Steve said softly breaking the tension
She snorted
“Not a lot of people do, and they know better than to come un announced into a deadly assassins room” She said giving him a smirk with her best intimidating stare.
Steve gulped and looked at her worried
“I uh-, I didn’t..”
She laughed, a genuine laugh
“I won’t kill you just yet” She said smirking and giving him a wink
She walked over to the stereo, turning it off and sitting on a nearby chair to remove her shoes. Steve stood there awkwardly, scratching his neck not knowing what to do or say.
“Steve you act like you just saw me naked, calm down, breathe, I told you you’re fine, as long as you don’t tell anyone about this I won’t be upset.” She said looking from him to her shoe, untying them.
“I wouldn’t dare tell a soul, ma’am” he said sheepishly
“Good, now stop standing there and wait for me outside while I change soldier” rolling her eyes in disbelief ‘god he’s so unbelievably virtuous’
He said nothing and stepped outside quickly, giving her, her space back. After she changed back into sweats and a tank top, she stepped outside and she saw him there on her couch giving Liho pets on her heads, the cat purring in enjoyment.
She spoke up behind him
“The files on the counter over there, you can take it” she said startling him a bit
“Yeah, I uh saw, I’ll just take it and be on my way” He said standing up, Liho not being very appreciative of the sudden halt of affection.
“Steve.”
“I- have a goodnight Nat, sorry again for my invasion”
“Steve.”
“And thank you for the file, I promise to give it back tomorrow.”
“Steve!” She yelled this time
He looked up at her, full attention
“I never said you had to leave, and for the millionth time, you are forgiven, we’re friends remember, I’m not gonna eat you” She said to him shaking her head and letting out a chuckle.
“I know but I just-“
“No buts, now leave the file there for now and just sit on the couch with me and watch a movie, your already here and I promised myself I’d make your old man self watch all the movies you missed up on” She smirked when he rolled her eyes at yet another jab at his old age
“First of I’m not old, and second.. Nat I really don’t wanna bother you” He replied
“Rogers just sit your ass on the damn couch would you” She said
Steve looked at her and gave up, dropping the file, and slumping back on the couch next to Liho. Natasha sat right beside him, getting comfortable, and turning on Star Wars. Steve got comfortable beside her, Liho moving onto his lap. The movie started and they fell into a comfortable silence.
“And Rogers... 100 years old is considered more than old” She smirked as he laughed and shoved her.
After that night, he’d visit more regularly, and she’d danced more openly around him, once even trying to teach him a thing or two about ballet. That didn’t end up going too well since Steve didn’t really have the built of a ballerina, but he appreciated the lesson. Little by little they grew closer and closer, into a comfort, and chemistry they both couldn’t help themselves from. And a couple years, and some months later, after complicated pinning after the other and being difficult when it came to showing their emotions, a shove from Clint and Sam, and now they were finally here.
“Mommy, mommy wake up, wake up!” A child’s enthusiastic voice rung into the early air of the room.
“Your son is calling you” Natasha mumbled into her pillow
“I’m pretty sure he said mommy” Steve said yawning and holding the body next to him closer
“Daddy, Daddy! The toof fairy came!” The little boy jumped even more enthusiastically
The boys parents rolled deeper into bed, only answering with a mumbled “that’s great”, which made the little boy jump onto the bed in between his parents
“Come on come on, wake up!” James said hoping for attention
Steve sat up carefully, stretching his arms into the air, with a big yawn.
“Alright buddy, alright I’m up” he yawned
Natasha yawned stilling laying bed but opening her eyes to be greeted by her son’s twinkling, blue eyes filled with joy. She smiled big at him and he smiled back with his crooked smile, missing a front tooth.
“You keep losing more and more teeth and you’ll make the tooth fairy run out of money” Natasha said to him
“Mommyyy, the tooth fairy can’t run out of money” they boy whined, correcting his mother
“Oh really, well In case she does, how about I just replaced them with kisses instead” and Natasha scooped the boy into her arms and filled his cheek with kisses and tickled his side
“Mommy!! Mommy!!! Tha- tickles!” He laughed, a innocent and joy filled laughed
Steve sat in awe at the sight and out of the corner of his eye saw a sleepy 3 year old girl coming into the room holding a teddy bear wearing a patriotic outfit. The girl rubbed her eyes and yawned.
“Daddy?” She yawned
Steve smiled and picked her up from the floor into his arms
“Hi Princess, did we wake you” He said tenderly
The little girl nodded but gave a small smile as her daddy gave her a giant kiss on the cheek. She laid her next to her brother, who was no longer being assaulted by kisses, but instead laying peacefully asleep with his mom’s arms wrapped around him. Sarah smiled when she saw her mom.
“Hi Mama” she said smiling
Natasha reached over and brushed her red curly locks
“Hi baby” She replied
Steve laid embracing their children in between the two and shortly the kids drifted back to sleep.
“Gosh I still can’t believe we got this lucky” he whispered looking at the sleeping kids with a smile
“Me either” Natasha smiled at Steve and back to her sleeping angels, before they both followed shortly after.
They both had ended getting a life, neither of them thinking it would’ve been possible. After all the chaos and fights, they’d finally been able to feel and be regular people. Natasha no longer wondered what it was like to belong to a family, She no longer dreamed or secretly yearned for one, She now had one of her own. Two beautiful children with her fiery locks and the blue orbs of their father, and she loved them very much. The ballet that she’d once used to keep her mind somewhere that wasn’t death, and pain, she’d now danced for joy and fun. In the house they lived in, similar to the one of Clint, Steve had built her a dance studio for her to enjoy. The room was spacious and it had mirrors and a beautiful floor. On the side of the room, leaned on a wall laid some paintings Steve had made while Natasha was focused on dancing. It showed her beauty and elegance and he’d told her it was the most beautiful painting he’d ever made. After James and Sarah were born she hadn’t danced as much, having to take care of her kids. But now that they were a little bit older Natasha was able to get back to doing what she loved, and she even taught them some ballet. Sarah being smaller would sit with her toys by the side and watch her mom and older brother twirl around the room and dance joyfully, and Steve would sometimes come in and sit with Sarah and he’d paint with her and watched. Ballet to Natasha was now something she could pass down to her kids, and she’d be happy know that they would dance out of Joy and not how she once danced at their age. She was finally in peace living the childhood dream she never in a million dreams would have imagined to come true, and she wouldn’t have it any other way.