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“Wow.” Bob said as he locked the restaurant door. “You know, I think your decorations actually brought in more customers.”
He looked around at the Valentine’s Day decor Linda had lovingly hung up around the restaurant: a garland of pink hearts hanging above the kitchen window, a heart-shaped wreath on the door, and a (slightly tacky) statue of Cupid on the counter. To further contribute to the atmosphere, she was wearing a headband with hearts on the antennas.
“I told ya, Bob!” Linda said. “People love holidays as much as I do. Not everyone’s as big of grumpy goose as you are.”
Bob rolled his eyes, joining her behind the counter.
“I’m not grumpy, Lin.” He said. “I just...don’t get as into this stuff as you do. Besides, it’s nothing special. Just another day.”
A hurt look appeared on Linda’s face, and she took a step away from him. Bob’s regret was instantaneous, and he pulled her back to him by the hand. He felt like an idiot for saying anything so negative, knowing how seriously Linda took holidays. Seeing that he’d hurt her feelings made his stomach hurt.
“Lin, I didn’t mean that.” He said. “I know these things mean a lot to you, and that means they’re important to me, too. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
Linda kept looking at him silently, her lower lip stuck out slightly in a pout. Bob knew he wasn’t the best at comforting people, but he thought his efforts would earn him a smile at the very least. He looked at her apologetically before continuing.
“And thank you for decorating the restaurant.” He added. “Really. You’re definitely better at knowing what customers want than I am.”
That much was true. Linda was naturally adept at dealing with people, and she had a way of making customers smile. It still irked Bob a little when he saw patrons openly making passes at her, but he had to admit that her charm brought in good tips. And hearing her excitedly announce: You know the guy who made your food? He’s my fiancé! I’m engaged to the Bob in Bob’s Burgers! always assuaged any inkling of jealousy he might have felt.
A small smile crept onto Linda’s face when she heard Bob’s compliment, and she came closer to him. Bob took that as a good sign and took one of her hands in his.
“I guess that’s why we make such a good team, Bobby.” She said. “I draw people in, and you wow ‘em with your amazing burgers.”
Bob smiled back at her, relieved that she had been so quick to forgive him.
“You’re right, Lin.” He said. “So...do you think we should start on the dishes now? Scrubbing grease off of plates is...pretty romantic. Right?”
Linda stood on her toes to give him a peck on the bridge of his nose.
“Sounds good to me.” She said.
As they headed toward the kitchen, Bob felt a warm rush of gratitude fill his chest. They really were a good team. He knew with certainty that he wouldn’t be standing in his own restaurant if it wasn’t for his fiancée.
Linda could make any one she met fall in love with her, and it wasn’t just because she was pretty. She was bubbly and sweet, and people could tell that it wasn’t an act. She was that friendly all the time, not just when she was angling for tips.
Bob would never understand how she could be so personable. Everytime he tried, it came out all wrong. Any attempts at being winsome left him feeling embarrassed and uncomfortable. He was glad Linda could make up for what he lacked. It was just like she said: she would mingle with customers, and he would try his best not to screw up their food. Bob felt like they had a good thing going, like they could really make the whole restaurant thing work if they just put every ounce of effort they had into it.
So far, that’s exactly what they’d been doing. They hadn’t seen any of their friends in weeks. They hadn’t had a date night in even longer. They woke up early and went to bed late, and they didn’t take much time for themselves any more. It wasn’t lost on Bob how lucky he was to be with someone who would sacrifice so much to help him build this.
When he’d first told Linda, back when they were first dating, that he wanted to open his restaurant, she hadn’t looked at him like he was crazy. She hadn’t warned him about how hard it was going to be, like his dad did constantly. She understood that he knew that. She’d just smiled and said: Wow! A restaurant, huh? I love a man with a plan.
She had believed in him without asking for an explanation, or a blueprint, or any kind of proof that he had every single step of the way planned out. Knowing that she thought he could do it made Bob feel empowered. It was the kind of supportive attitude that he liked to imagine his mom would’ve had about the whole thing, and the sense of relief he’d experienced in that moment was breathtaking. There was someone else on the planet who saw him for who he was and believed in him anyway. It felt amazing.
Now they were approaching six months of running the restaurant, and Bob still went in most days feeling nervous. Nervous, but a little giddy, too. He couldn’t believe that it was actually happening. It was like he’d spent his whole life feeling restless, dreaming of a time when he would stop feeling miserable, and now the rest of his life was finally beginning.
He actually had his own restaurant. His dream restaurant, with the rotating selection of specials, and the booths that looked like they could’ve come from a 50’s diner. He was marrying his best friend in...October, maybe? Or August? He could never remember.
His life was exactly where he wanted it to be...almost. Sometimes he thought that maybe he had been a little impulsive , buying their place when he did. Money was tight. Tighter than he had expected going into it, if he was being honest.
If it was just him on his own, then he wouldn’t feel so bad about it, but sometimes he felt like he was depriving Linda of some greater life. He knew that if she wasn’t with him, she would probably be working somewhere where she had a herd of coworkers to gossip with. Or she could be married to someone who made a lot of money, someone who could afford to give her a nice Valentine’s Day gift.
“I’m...sorry about today, Lin.” Bob said suddenly, the guilty feeling expanding in his stomach.
He set down the coffee mug he was rinsing, dried off his hands, and turned towards Linda. When he wrapped his arms around her waist, she gave him a questioning look.
“You mean when you finished off my crackers? I’m over that. Mostly. We can get another box, when—“
“Linda, no.” Bob interrupted. “I’m talking about Valentine’s Day. I didn’t get you anything.”
Linda stared at him for a moment before throwing her head back and cackling. She pushed his shoulder playfully, as though he had just delivered the funniest punchline in the world.
“Uh...what?” Bob asked. “What’s so funny? I’m saying sorry!”
Linda’s face relaxed into a gentle smile as her laughter died down, and Bob still couldn’t tell what she was thinking. He hoped she understood that he actually felt bad, and that he wasn’t just posturing to stay on her good side.
“Oh, Bobby.” She said softly. “You know I don’t care about any of that material stuff.”
Bob nodded. He did know that. Linda appreciated fancy things, and she liked watching rich people on TV, but she wasn’t someone who particularly lusted for money. She was a hard worker, and she was grateful for anything she had. She was always content to stay in and get drunk on cheap wine together, even when some of her friend’s boyfriends could afford to buy them expensive meals.
“I know.” Bob said. “And that’s great. But uh...why were you laughing? I really do wish I could’ve...I don’t know. Done something for you today. Like, anything. I’m not kidding.”
Linda kept smiling at him.
“I believe you, Bobby.” She said. “I’m not laughing at you! I’m laughing, because...I’ve seen our bank account, you know. It’s not like I was expecting 24 karat gold.”
Bob sighed.
“Yeah. That’s—I know. But you shouldn’t have to expect...I don’t know. Crap. You deserve—“
“What?” Linda cut him off.
“I deserve someone who puts up with me singing in the car? Who holds my hair back when I barf? Who makes me feel safe, and warm, and loved? I already have all that, Bobby!”
Bob allowed himself to smile at the annoyed look on her face, and he liked knowing that he was doing some things right, but the discomfort in his stomach didn’t subside completely.
“All I’m saying, Lin,” He said, “is that if you were marrying someone else—“
Linda’s expression went from irritated to incredulous. She interrupted Bob again.
“Then what?” She asked. “I wouldn’t be the happiest girl in the world? Don’t be crazy. You know I’d live in a cardboard box with you. We spent today together, and that’s all that matters.”
Bob finally felt some of the tension enveloping him release. If Linda was getting this fired up, then it was obvious she meant what she was saying. Bob respected her opinion, and he didn’t want to discredit it. If she truly didn’t mind the lack of extravagance, then he wouldn’t keep arguing with her about it.
“Okay.” He conceded. “Thanks. I had a nice time today, too. I think you’re the only person I could be around all day without going crazy.”
Linda laughed.
“Like I don’t drive you nuts some days, Bobby. What about when I kept sneaking tomato slices?”
Bob frowned slightly at the memory which made her laugh again. Admittedly, they both knew exactly how to get on the other’s nerves.
“Well, maybe sometimes you make me a little...not completely sane. But—wait, did you actually say you’d live in a cardboard box with me?”
The humor disappeared from Linda’s face, and she nodded at him with a deadly serious look on her face.
“Yeah!” Linda said. “We’d have to get rid of some things, but...”
Bob chuckled, ready to hear Linda’s crazy rationalization for two grown adults living together in a cardboard box. When she trailed off, he took the opportunity to lean down and kiss her.
“Sorry.” He said. “I just really wanted to do that.”
••••
Bob opened his front door quickly, hoping Linda hadn’t fallen asleep yet. When she’d brought their daughter downstairs to say goodnight a couple of hours before, she’d mentioned how tired she was.
When he arrived in the living room, Linda was lying prone on the couch, her head propped up on a pillow. She wore a pale blue maternity dress and her favorite pair of comfy, pink socks.
“Bobby, thank god.” She said, making grabby hands at him. “My back is killing me, and I’ve been going crazy all alone up here.”
He went to her side and took her hand, wincing sympathetically.
“Hey, Lin.” He said. “Sorry for taking so long. This customer was taking forever on his burger. Did Tina go down okay?”
Linda smiled fondly.
“Of course she did! She went right to sleep, sweet as can be. Just like a little angel.” She put a hand on her stomach. “I hope this one is as well behaved as his big sister.”
“Yeah. How is he, by the way?”
He bent down to kiss her stomach.
“Mad at his mommy, apparently. He’s been kicking non-stop!”
Bob put a hand on her belly to feel for himself, and he felt a kick almost immediately. His heart still skipped a beat every time that happened.
Linda was seven months along, but she still spent most of her days in the restaurant. She insisted on pulling her weight, and she knew how hard it was for Bob to both cook the food and serve customers. Bob felt very conflicted about the arrangement. On one hand, having her at work certainly made things run much smoother. On the other, watching Linda work while so heavily pregnant made him feel like a terrible husband. Standing up for long periods of time was hard on her back, and Bob felt guilty letting her work even when she wanted to.
Linda usually spent the morning at work before taking Tina upstairs for her afternoon nap. After that, they both came back down to spend time in the restaurant until it was time for Tina to go to bed for the night. Bob missed listening to Linda’s bad jokes while he was working all day, and he even missed most of her semi annoying habits. It was as lonely downstairs lately as it had been during the last couple months of her first pregnancy.
“Bobby, can I ask you something?” Linda asked.
“Oh.” Bob said, worried by her serious tone. “Yeah, Lin. What is it?”
“Did you really like that CD I got you, or were you just being nice?”
Relieved, nodded. Linda had given him his Valentine’s Day present that morning, before the restaurant opened.
“You know I did, Lin.” He said. “I love Donna Summer. And don’t think I forgot about your Valentine’s Day! I have a little something planned.”
Linda raised an eyebrow.
“You do?” She asked warily. “Bobby, please don’t tell me I have to get dressed and go out somewhere. I feel like I’m carrying around an anchor, and I have to pee every five seconds.”
Bob shook his head. He knew how exhausted Linda had been lately.
“Don’t worry. You don’t have to leave the apartment. Just give me a few minutes to get it ready, okay?”
She looked curious, but she decided not to ask any questions.
“Well...okay, Bobby.” She said. “Hurry, though, okay? I missed ya.”
Bob squeezed her hand again in an attempt to be comforting. Pregnancy had a way of making Linda swing wildly from extremes. She either wanted Bob at her side at every moment, spooning her as she fell asleep and playing with her hair while they watched TV, or she snapped at him when he did so much as brush against her in the restaurant. It was obvious which mood she was in tonight.
“I’ll go as fast as I can.” Bob said.
He quickly began gathering the supplies he needed, grabbing a book and glass jar that he’d hidden under the crib in the nursery. The jar was something from the restaurant that he’d repurposed, and he’d gotten the book at a thrift store.
With these items in hand, he headed toward the bathroom. He began running the bath water, vigilantly watching the knob as he turned it to the perfect temperature. He loosened the jar’s lid and began sprinkling in the rose petals he’d kept inside. Some of them were brown around the edges, but he hoped Linda wouldn’t be too bothered by the aesthetics. He picked up a bar of soap.
“You’re the best husband ever, Bob!” He said, raising his voice to a falsetto pitch.
“I know, soap.”
He smiled to himself, then he went into the kitchen and began pouring grape juice into his wife’s favorite wine glass.
“Bobby, are you almost done?” He heard her call from the couch. “I hear the bath running!”
“Almost.” He assured her.
After setting the glass on the bathroom counter next to the book, he returned to the living room. Linda’s face brightened when she saw him.
“Are you ready to be romanced, Linda?”
She giggled.
“Bobby, just tell me what it is!”
He shook his head silently, helping her up. She held onto his arm as he led her to the bathroom, and gasped when she walked in and saw his set-up.
“The water is warm but not hot.” Bob explained immediately, pleased by her reaction. “For the baby.”
“Oh, Bobby.” Linda said softly, peering into the tub. “Rose petals, I love it!”
In his head, Bob cheered. Even though his gesture was simple and cheap, it had made Linda happy. She gasped again when he handed her her drink.
“It’s not wine, obviously.” He clarified, when she gave him a questioning look. “It’s grape juice, but I thought maybe you could pretend.”
Linda laughed.
“I’ll take what I can get! This is perfect, Bobby.”
“Wait,” He said, “I have one more thing.”
He placed the book in her hand.
“It’s one of those murder books you like. I was pretty sure you haven’t read that one. The description said it was “ sexy, shocking and deadly ”.”
Linda examined the book’s cover, already looking invested.
“Ooh!” She said as she flipped through the pages. “I love two out of three of those words! This looks juicy!”
She looked back up at Bob, and her face softened.
“This was so nice, Bob.” She said. “Thank you.”
She reached in to hug him gently, careful not to put pressure on her stomach, and he felt another surge of pride. He knew he had a tendency to drop the ball when Linda wanted him to be romantic, but this felt like a win.
“Stay in here as long as you want.” He said when she pulled away. “I’ll listen for Tina, and then I’ll make dinner when you come out. Okay?”
Linda closed the space between them with a short kiss.
“Thank you, Bobby.” She said. “Happy Valentine’s Day.”
They kissed again, and this time they both leaned in at the same time.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, Lin.”
••••
Bob watched his five year old daughter squint her eyes as she focused on what she was drawing, tracing her peach-colored crayon in a careful circle. When she started drawing something next to it, her small elbow jerked to the left and sent her new toy horse soaring off the table’s edge. Bob jumped into action instantaneously, grabbing the toy before it hit the floor. He smiled to himself, absurdly proud at having rescued the toy animal. Tina let out a gasp.
“Thank you, Dad!” She said. “Chariot could’ve gotten hurt.”
She took her doll from his hand and began stroking its mane.
“It’s okay, girl.” She said, imitating a phrase she’d heard in the horse movies she loved.
“Uh...no problem, Tina.” Bob said.
On his other side, his son was squirming ceaselessly in his seat. His method of drawing was far less precise than Tina’s, which was made obvious by the way he was haphazardly scribbling with the red crayon in his hand. It seemed his artistic vision was also more creative than his sister’s, because the person he had drawn had bright blue skin.
“Gene, who is that?” Bob asked cautiously, not wanting to put a dent in his son’s confidence.
“Mommy!” Gene said, as though the answer were obvious.
The scribble on his paper was a little frightening, if Bob was being honest. Gene had drawn a huge, bulbous head without limbs. The hair scribbled on top in black crayon only made his rendition of Linda look slightly more human. Bob could only identify her by her trademark red glasses, which Gene had messily added on top of her face.
“She’s gonna love that, Gene.” Bob said. Gene beamed at him.
Linda would. If it were up to her, every single craft the kids made would be framed in a museum. She refused to admit that she might be a little biased.
“Do you think she’ll like mine?” Tina asked, sounding insecure.
Bob turned to look at her drawing, and he saw that her circle had become another rendering of Linda. Next to her was smaller figure, also with dark hair, and they were pressed close together. The picture was much neater than Gene’s, and Tina had written Happy Valentine’s Day across the top in pink with Bob prompting her on the spelling.
“There’s mommy again.” Bob said, pointing to Linda. “Who is that with her?”
“That’s me.” Tina said. “I drew us cuddling on the couch.
Bob smiled, examining the picture again. On second glance, the drawing next to Linda did kind of look like Tina. Bob pictured them cuddling on the couch like they loved to do, Tina giggling as Linda read her stories or sang her made up songs.
“Wow.” Bob said. “You guys did a great job. I bet these will be your mom’s favorite Valentines ever.”
Tina looked proud of herself as she stared down at her drawing, and Gene continued adding various colors to his picture. Bob thought he could make out a blue sky, but it could’ve just been another one of Gene’s artistic liberties.
Bob looked at his own paper, sitting on the table in front of him. Valentine’s Day had fallen on a Saturday that year, and Bob and Linda had decided to close the restaurant. It was unusual for them to close on more minor holidays, but Linda was adamant about the family spending the day together.
On a typical day, the two of them alternated going upstairs to care for the baby while the other ran the restaurant. Because they’d taken the day off, both he and Linda had spent all day entertaining the kids. Linda had spent the morning making heart shaped sandwiches with the older kids, while Bob played blocks with their one-year-old. He had to admit: it was even better than cooking all day.
It was Louise’s nap time now, and Bob had convinced Linda to crawl into bed to rest once they set Louise in her crib. She was reluctant to miss out on any Valentine’s related activities, but she was also totally exhausted. She’d collapsed in a heap beneath their covers, and Bob hadn’t heard a peep from her for the last hour and a half.
Once she’d fallen asleep, Bob had recruited Gene and Tina to help him pick up all of the toys strewn across the living room before making them an afternoon snack. While they were eating, he cleaned the dishes and swept up the kitchen floor. After that was all finished, he stumbled on the brilliant idea of making homemade Valentine’s cards for Linda.
It was exactly the kind of cheesy, sentimental thing she would love, and they still weren’t in a place financially where they could afford to get each other real gifts. Linda had given him a used copy of a movie he loved, which Bob was thrilled with. Hopefully, cards from the kids would satisfy her Valentine’s Day spirit.
Bob picked up a crayon and continued the messy picture he’d been working on. After a few more minutes of idle scribbling, a familiar shriek of noise interrupted the quiet afternoon. Bob startled slightly.
“Louise.” Tina said knowingly, looking excited. Gene’s smile mirrored hers.
Gene and Tina had grown attached to Louise very shortly after she first arrived home. Bob could tell they didn’t view her as any kind of competition. Louise was the third and final piece of their puzzle, and her older siblings were fascinated with every move she made.
When Louise’s cries were silenced, Bob knew Linda had risen from bed and given her a pacifier. Moments later, he heard the bedroom door creek open. Linda shuffled into the kitchen, carrying Louise on her hip. Sure enough, there was a pink pacifier sticking out of her mouth.
“Hi mommy. Hi Louise.” Tina said happily.
“Hi!” Gene chimed in, catapulting out of his chair to wrap his arms around Linda’s leg.
“Hello my babies.” Linda said as she handed the baby in her arms over to Bob.
She lifted Gene into her arms to give him a tight hug before pressing a kiss to the top of Tina’s head.
“Hey, Lin.” Bob said. “Did you have a good nap?”
“The best.” Linda replied. “That is, until this one woke me up.”
She pointed a finger at Louise, but she did so with a loving smile. Bob held his daughter close to him, as he always did, and realized how much he had missed Louise while she was sleeping. He remembered how nervous he had been holding Tina for the first time, afraid of dropping her. Five years later, he dreaded the day his youngest would be too old to be carried around. Louise babbled something that sounded vaguely like mama , which made both of her parents smile as her siblings giggled in awe.
“What are you guys drawing?” Linda asked, peering at the sheets of paper on the table as she sat down next to Tina.
“Valentime’s!” Gene explained with a goofy, excited smile on his face. Bob didn’t bother correcting his pronunciation.
“They’re for you, mommy.” Tina said. “See? I drew me and you.”
Bob watched Linda’s face light up as she gaped at Tina’s drawing and then light up again when she saw Gene’s. He wasn’t surprised to see tears fill her eyes as she fawned over the kids’ drawings, pulling them close to her face to inspect them. Bob blew a raspberry on Louise’s belly, making her giggle.
He felt satisfied as he watched his wife shower Gene and Tina in profuse praise before hanging their pictures up on the front of the refrigerator. They fit in well with the sea of messy drawings that already adorned their fridge, and the kids looked ecstatic that their mom loved their creations so much.
“So...Lin.” Bob said when Linda had gotten past her hysterics. “Valentine’s from the kids. Pretty good surprise, right?”
Linda laughed, coming up behind him to wrap her arms around his neck.
“Yes, Bobby!” She said. “Thank you. This is the best Valentine’s Day ever.”
Bob sighed contentedly, glad that he had made it through the day without disappointing Linda or forgetting the holiday completely. She gave him a kiss on the cheek and pulled away with a loud smack.
“Oh...wait a minute!” She said when she looked back down at the table. “What’s this?”
She picked up the sheet of white paper that Bob had in front of him, and he cringed. He’d forgotten about the drawing he’d done in an effort to stay involved in his kids’ fun.
It was of five stick figures, all varying in size, standing on top of a burger. Bob had been dismayed to see that they were out of green crayons, meaning that this burger didn’t have any lettuce on it.
“Oh.” Bob laughed. “That’s my Valentine to you, Lin. See? It’s all five of us, and we’re standing on top of a burger. Like the restaurant? It....seemed like a better idea in my head.”
He heard Linda’s laugh in his ear as Gene and Tina leaned in to get a better look at his drawing. Maybe he would’ve spent a little more time on it if he had known his entire family would be scrutinizing it together.
“Pretty picture, Daddy.” Tina said, and it was painfully obvious that she was just being nice.
“Very pretty!” Linda laughed. “This is going on the fridge.”
Bob shook his head, picturing his embarrassingly bad artwork hanging amongst the other messy scribbles on their fridge. At least when the kids’ art was disastrous, it was cute.
“What? Linda, stop. Just throw it away. It’s dumb.”
He put a hand up to take the paper from her, but she stuck her arm above her head and dangled it out of his reach.
“No way, mister!” She said. “Are you kidding me? I wanna remember this Valentine’s Day forever! We’re keeping this. Right, kids?”
“Yeah!” Gene said, because he thought everything his mom said was brilliant.
“Yeah, put it up!” Tina said.
Louise responded to the commotion with a gurgling sound, causing her pacifier to tumble from her mouth. Linda laughed.
“See, Bobby!” She said. “Louise agrees with us. Isn’t that right, baby?”
Bob groaned as he picked up Louise’s pacifier, but he didn’t do anything to stop Linda when she walked over to the fridge and began hanging up his little doodle. She looked so happy, and he wouldn’t do anything to ruin her fun.
“Fine, but this counts as your Mother’s Day gift.” He said grouchily, going to rinse the pacifier off in the sink.
Linda stopped him as she walked away from the fridge, putting a hand on his chest and kissing him softly and firmly on the mouth. It was a brief kiss, and when Linda pulled away, she gave him a little smile.
“Thanks for having my babies make those cards for me, Bob.” She said. “You’re the best Valentine a girl could ask for.”
The irritation on Bob’s face was replaced with a begrudging smile.
“Anytime, Lin.” He said.
••••
Bob was in the middle of a good dream when his alarm woke him up. It was something about cooking lemon garlic chicken, and he knew Mort had made an appearance, but the details disappeared seconds after he opened his eyes.
He rolled over to face Linda, a small smile on his face. For once, he didn’t dread getting out of bed. In fact, his customary sluggishness was replaced by a giddy feeling. It was Valentine’s Day, and it was the first year that he actually felt thoroughly prepared. He’d gotten Linda a gift that he could confidently say she would love, and he was looking forward to seeing her face light up when she saw it. He was hoping he could show it to her first thing in the morning.
“Lin!” He said when she faced him. “Good morning! Happy—!”
“Bob, can you get started on breakfast?” She cut him off. “I still need to give Louise a bath, since she refused to take one last night. I swear that child is gonna be the death of me.”
“Oh. Uh...are you sure you don’t want me to take care of it? Louise might—“
“I’ve got it.” Linda said with a sigh. “I wouldn’t want to put you through all that.”
She got out of bed in a hurry, putting on her glasses and straightening her nightgown. She was out of the room before he could respond, leaving Bob deflated. He felt a sting of disappointment, then immediately felt guilty about it. He couldn’t expect Linda to postpone getting the kids ready for school just to open his gift.
Still, it was the first year in a long time that he hadn’t woken up to a Happy Valentine’s Day, Bobby! accompanied by a flurry of kisses. He had a distinct feeling that something was missing. If you’d asked Bob on any other day, he would’ve insisted that he wasn’t attached to any of his wife’s corny, lovey-dovey traditions. Apparently, he was a little more sentimental than he thought.
“Bobby!” He heard Linda call from another room. “Are you gonna sleep all day, or are you gonna come make your kids some breakfast? Some help out here would be nice!”
Her voice was taught, and it immediately propelled Bob up and out of bed. He felt another touch of guilt at having wasted time sulking instead of doing what his wife had asked.
“Sorry, Lin!” He said, raising his voice so it would carry across the apartment. “On it!”
As he headed to the kitchen, he heard the sound of rushing water. He was glad that Louise had decided against being difficult. That, or she was still too groggy to put up much of a fight. She was only in kindergarten, but she still treated going to school every day as though it were the most laborious chore in the world.
Bob couldn’t really blame Linda for waking up in a bad mood. Louise had thrown a gargantuan tantrum at bath time the night before, and she’d been thrashing around forcefully enough that she could’ve hurt herself. That was the only reason she’d gotten out of taking one.
Bob began cracking enough eggs for everyone, and he busied himself with preparing the other details of his family’s breakfast as they cooked. He stuck two slices of bread in the toaster, knowing Gene’s appetite wouldn’t be satisfied by scrambled eggs alone, and poured each of the kids a glass of orange juice.
He washed a handful of strawberries in the sink and distributed them onto everyone’s plate. When the eggs were cooked, he squirted ketchup on Linda’s because he knew she liked them that way.
“Good morning, Dad.” Tina said politely as she entered the kitchen, sitting in her usual spot at the breakfast table.
“Good morning, Tina.” He said. “Did your sister get her bath?”
The little girl nodded.
“Mom put Kuchi Kopi on the toilet seat for her to look at the whole time, and I guess that calmed her down.”
Bob took a seat, secretly relieved that Linda had taken it upon herself to handle Louise’s bath time. He probably wouldn’t have thought to introduce his daughter’s favorite toy into the situation.
“Mom still seems a little grumpy, though.” Tina added, a concerned look in her eyes. “Did you forget to ask her to be your Valentine?”
Bob smiled at her. His oldest child’s thoughtfulness about the people around her was sweet. It was a quality she’d had since Bob could remember, and he thought she definitely took after Linda in that way. Neither Tina or Linda could bear seeing any member of their family upset.
“I didn’t forget, Tina.” He said. “But I haven’t gotten around to it yet.”
Tina seemed to mull his assurance over, but the worry on her face remained.
“Don’t forget, okay?” She said.
Bob swallowed a bite of his eggs, giving her a smile that he hoped would dispel her anxiety.
“I won’t, Tina.” He said gently.
She smiled back at him, and their peaceful conversation was interrupted by the sound of Louise’s loud, high pitched voice.
“1...2...3...go!” She yelled.
Her declaration was followed by the sound of feet slamming down on the apartment’s wooden floors, with Linda’s slippers shuffling idly after them. Gene and Louise skidded to a halt when they reached the kitchen, and their mother sighed behind them.
“Kids, cool your engines.” She scolded.
“No running in the house, kids.” Bob said at the same time.
Louise completely ignored her parents’ protests, pumping a fist in the air and whooping.
“I won!” She cried. “I knew I would. I beat you!”
Gene smiled and shrugged as he slid into his seat, seemingly unbothered by his sister’s victory. He and Louise had been the best of friends from the time she learned to walk, but that didn’t mean he was safe from her fierce competitiveness. Lately, Louise was turning every little thing into a competition between she and her siblings. And Louise loved to win.
“But I’m the one with more food on my plate, so who’s the real winner here?” Gene asked, taking a bite of his toast.
Bob tuned out the playful bickering that ensued, fixing his gaze on his wife. She had her cheek resting in one hand, and she was glumly picking at her food. Bob was at a loss.
Linda loved holidays— all holidays. She loved decorating and coming up with excuses to shower the kids in even more affection than they usually received. She even relished Valentine’s Day in particular. Of course she did! It was a day dedicated to love, and Linda had more love to give than anyone Bob knew. In fact, it was only a few days ago that she’d been singing some silly song about how excited she was for the fourteenth.
Bob didn’t understand why or how she had woken up on the wrong side of the bed on today of all days, and seeing her without her usual holiday spirit worried him a little. Not to mention, he still felt somewhat disheartened that he hadn’t gotten the opportunity to give her her gift.
Linda’s exuberance on holidays could be slightly grating at times, but Bob still admired her enthusiasm. Growing up, holidays with his dad had been quiet and, oftentimes, filled with tension. With Linda, every holiday was joyful and loving in a way Bob hadn’t known since his mom was alive. The idea that she wasn’t fully rejoicing in one of her favorite things gave Bob a pang of sadness. He only hoped that his present could help her out of her gloom.
As breakfast continued, Linda’s bad mood hadn’t lifted. She remained uncharacteristically silent for most of their mean, only speaking up to remind Louise to finish her juice. When everyone was finished eating, she and Bob both stood to clean off the table and rinse off the breakfast dishes.
“You okay?” He whispered when they met at the kitchen sink.
Linda shrugged.
“Yeah.” She said. “Guess I’m just in kind of a crappy mood.”
“Oh, well—“
“And you put way too much ketchup on my eggs, Bob. They were all soggy. Blech.”
Bob’s face fell. Linda wasn’t the type to be needlessly negative, and the rudeness behind her remark struck a chord with him. He and Linda were certainly no strangers to bickering, or even to larger fights, but she rarely said anything so purposefully mean. She knew how important cooking was to him. He was starting to really worry about her.
“Okay, kids.” Linda said, turning away from Bob. “Time for school!”
When Tina entered the fourth grade, her parents had decided she was responsible enough to lead her siblings on the short walk to school. Linda had been a nervous wreck about them walking by themselves for the first few weeks, but she had mostly come to terms with the arrangement. Tina was trustworthy, and she would never let her younger siblings come into harm’s way. Besides, they lived in a safe community.
Today, Bob was grateful that neither he or Linda had to leave to drive the kids’ to school. He was anxious for them to be alone, so he could figure out what was bothering her. He knelt down to help Louise button up her coat, but she pushed his hand away.
“Daddy, I’ve got it!” She shrieked.
Bob sighed. Louise liked doing things for herself, and she hated admitting that she needed help. It was as frustrating at times as it was impressive at others. Bob stood up just as Linda finished wrapping a scarf around Gene’s neck. She surveyed the kids, making sure they were all properly bundled up for the February chill, and seemed satisfied with their attire.
“Alright.” She said. “Looks like everyone is—“
“Wait!” Tina said suddenly.
Bob could tell she was anxious about something. Tina had developed a host of anxieties lately, from the mundane to the wildly unrealistic. She was turning into a pretty neurotic kid. Bob crouched down to look her in the eye, setting a comforting hand on her shoulder.
“What’s wrong, Tina?” He asked.
“We almost forgot our Valentine’s!” She said with big, fearful eyes.
Bob spared a glance at Linda, and he watched as horrified realization dawned on her face at the mention of Valentine’s. She brought a hand up to cover her mouth as Tina continued talking.
“If we don’t bring them, how will my classmates know that I want them to stop horsing around and be my Valentines?” She asked. “What if they expel us for not believing in the magic of love? What if—?”
Bob shook his head and put a hand up, wanting to stop her before she started to hyperventilate. Linda was still too frozen in shock to say anything.
“None of that is going to happen, Tina.” He said. “You kids will just go get your Valentines from your rooms, and no one will ever know that we almost forgot. Okay?”
Tina nodded vigorously, trying to collect herself, before racing off to her room. Gene and Louise, who had both perked up noticeably at the reminder that they would be getting candy at school, followed closely behind her.
Bob watched them for a moment before turning to Linda.
“Lin, it’s—“ He started.
She looked on the verge of tears, but he heard the kids’ sneakers skidding back into the room before he could say anything to make her feel better. He briefly scanned the boxes in the kids’ hands, making sure they all had enough for everyone in their classes.
“Look, Dad!” Gene said excitedly, holding up one of his cards. “Mine have robots on them! And they’re eating tacos!”
“Mine have horses.” Tina said, gazing adoringly at the 50 cent cards she’d picked out.
“Very cool, my babies.” Linda said indulgently, snapping out of her haze.
“Those are great, guys.” Bob said.
Louise stood on her tip toes to glare into her brother’s box, very offended by the idea that anyone else’s belongings could be complimented.
“Robots? Big deal.” She said insolently. “Mine have dinosaurs! They’re way better than your dumb robots.”
“It’s not a competition, Louise.” Bob said. “And you kids need to leave before you’re late.”
Linda looked agitated, clearly still upset by her realization. She met Bob’s eyes and jerked her head towards the door, signaling for him to usher the kids out. Bob obliged, hurrying them out the door and grabbing onto Gene and Louise’s backpacks to steer them forward. He ignored their protests as he lightly pushed them onto the sidewalk.
“Have fun at school, kids!” He called after them as he tightly shut the door.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, my babies.” Linda added sullenly, even though they could no longer hear her.
When Bob turned around, he was met by a guilt-ridden Linda.
“Bobby—“ She started, her eyebrows furrowed in utter stress. She looked seconds away from bursting into tears.
“It’s okay.” Bob said quickly, not wanting Linda to spend the day wallowing in guilt. “Seriously. This is, like, payback for all of the things I’ve forgotten.”
He really wasn’t mad. In fact, the fact that Linda had simply forgotten what day it was was comforting. It was much less scary than the idea that something had made her so sad she could no longer enjoy one of her favorite holidays. Now that she remembered, they could share the rest of the day together. Everything would be fine.
“I feel awful!” Linda cried, her shrill tone approaching a whine as she threw herself into Bob.
He returned her hug, embracing her tightly. He imagined that for Linda, lover of all celebrations, this felt like a disaster. He stroked her back soothingly with one hand and felt her shoulders shake as she started to cry.
“Linda, please don’t be upset.” He said. “It’s really not a big deal.”
“I was being so mean to you, Bobby!” She wailed. “I’m the worst Valentine ever!”
Bob chuckled quietly against her before pulling away so he could look her in the eye. Linda was being ridiculous. She was probably the best mom and wife ever, and Valentine’s Day slipping her mind for thirty minutes didn’t change that.
“No, you aren’t.” He said. “You’re the best Valentine. You gave Louise a bath, so I didn’t have to! That was a very...romantic gesture.”
Linda sniffled.
“That’s true.” She said, wiping her face with the back of one hand. “And it wasn’t easy. She kept digging her little claws into my arm.”
“See?” Bob said. “Would a bad Valentine have gone through all that?”
Linda’s heartache appeared to be healing a little, because she had stopped crying and was now returning his smile.
“I guess not.” She admitted, then her eyes went wide as a flash of excitement crossed her face.
“Oh! Bobby, I have a present for you!” She said. “I was gonna wait until after the kids were in bed, but—can I give it to you now? It’ll make me feel better.”
Bob was a little surprised. He had been so excited to give Linda her gift that he hadn’t even considered that she had one for him.
“Sure, Lin.” He said. “I uh...actually have something for you, too.”
“Yay!” She cheered. “Look at us, being all Valentine-y. I’ll be right back!”
She had stopped actively crying, which relieved Bob, and she looked significantly more cheerful as they both went off to retrieve each other’s presents. Bob had hidden his gift on the top shelf of their closet, beneath an old sweater, and he heard Linda fumbling in their dresser drawers to look for hers.
When they reconvened in the living room, Linda’s typical cheeriness seemed to have been completely restored. She sat on the couch, looking expectant as she stared down the present Bob had clumsily wrapped.
“Here!” She said, shoving his gift at him as he joined her on the couch. “You open yours first, Bobby.”
Bob took the package from her hands. It was long, and when he held it, he noticed that it wasn’t heavy.
“I think you’re gonna liiiiike it!” Linda sang.
She didn’t take her eyes off of him as he opened his gift, which Bob found slightly unnerving. Peeling back the pink wrapping paper, he revealed a spatula that looked almost identical to the one he currently used at the restaurant. Bob beamed down at it.
“You said something about how old yours is, so...I thought it was time for an upgrade! Do ya like it?” Linda asked.
Bob nodded, picking up his new instrument to examine it. It was something that he needed and would actually use, and he appreciated that she’d gotten him something so thoughtful. It was nice to know that his offhand complaints about his old spatula hadn’t gone unheard.
“Lin, this is perfect!” Bob said sincerely. “It’s great. Thank you! I can’t wait to use this today.”
Looking pleased with herself, Linda kissed his cheek.
“I knew you’d like it!” She said. “Can I open mine now, or what?”
Finally, Bob thought.
“Absolutely, Lin.”
He handed her her gift, half wishing he had just put it in a gift bag instead of trying to wrap it. He knew how much Linda liked tearing open gift wrap, though, so he was glad she would get to do that. As soon as she had the present in her hands, she began hastily ripping the paper away. Despite himself, Bob felt a twinge of nervousness.
Realistically, he knew that Linda would like what he had picked out for her, but there was still a nagging voice in his head suggesting that she’d be disappointed. He felt like a lackluster husband for 364 days out of the year, and he wanted one day to feel like he’d managed to get something right.
“Bobby!” Linda shouted when her present was unwrapped, holding it up to show him as though he hadn’t been the one to give it to her.
Bob smiled. He hadn’t seen the present since wrapping it the week before, and he was happy to see that it was just as cute as he remembered. It was a wooden frame with one baby picture of each of the kids inside, but Linda was reacting as though it were a winning lottery ticket. She kissed the picture of baby Tina, leaving a smudge on the glass.
For days, Bob had scoured over the kids’ baby pictures, trying to determine which was Linda’s favorite of each child. In the end, it was obvious that she liked his choices.
“My babies!” She cried. “Oh, my perfect little babies! Look at them, Bob!”
Bob joined in looking at the pictures. The kids were so small, so cute, so theirs . He was just as glad as Linda that they had photos to remember those moments by.
“Do you really like it?” He asked.
She looked at him like he was crazy.
“Like it? This is the best give ever! Ever !”
She gently set the frame on the coffee table before practically tackling him with a kiss, throwing her arms around his neck. Bob reciprocated when her tongue brushed against his, but she pulled away before the kiss could deepen.
“Bobby, I’m really sorry for being such a negative noodle this morning.” She said, the sadness from before returning to her face. “I was just in a bad mood because of the bath, and I—“
“Lin.” He said firmly. “You don’t have to keep apologizing. Really. We’re fine. I’m glad you like your gift.”
Linda smiled, bringing her hands to the sides of his face.
“It’s perfect. I’m so glad you’re my Valentine. I promise I’ll never forget again.”
She gave him another, much more chaste, kiss before relaxing back into the couch. She leaned into him, pulling her feet up and resting her head on his chest. Bob put an arm around her.
“Do you think we should head down to the restaurant?” He asked. “I can start using my new spatula.”
Linda shook her head, burying her face into his tee shirt.
“Let’s just sit here for a while, okay? We’ll go down in a bit.”
Bob smiled down at her, even though she couldn’t see it, and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
“Sure, Lin.” He said, tightening his grip around her. “We can stay here for as long as you want.”
••••
“Remember to drive safely, Tina.” Bob said, pulling a wad of cash from the register and handing it off to her.
Tina didn’t glare, or sigh dramatically, but Bob saw her face stiffen for a moment before falling slightly. It was the Tina equivalent of an eye-roll at his reminder.
“Do you seriously think I’d risk getting into a horrible accident on this day, the most romantic day of the year? Today could be the day Jimmy Jr. asks me to prom!”
Bob didn’t mention that prom was still months away, and he also didn’t tell her there was no way Jimmy Jr. would commit to a date with her so many months in advance.
“Right, of course.” He said. “I guess I was crazy to think that.”
“I think you shortchanged me here, dad.” Louise said, extending her open palm. “I mean...three dollars for a school lunch? Let’s try fifty.”
“Nice try, Louise.”
“It was worth a shot, right? I also wouldn’t say no to a nice Andrew Jackson, just for the record.”
Bob glowered at her from behind the counter, but there was no real malice behind it. He found it hard to believe how much she had grown. She was still one of the shortest kids in her grade, but to Bob, she might as well have been six foot four. He felt the same way about all of his kids. Watching them age gave him the strangest mix of pride and sadness, and he couldn’t stand to think about the day that they were all out living on their own.
Bob found solace in the constants. His kids’ vibrant personalities hadn’t diminished with age, and he was grateful for that. Gene was still as excitable as ever, despite the stubble that was now dotting his chin. Tina may have been a senior in high school, but she hadn’t updated her horse-themed room since she was a kid. Louise, to her credit, still had never met a rule she was inclined to follow.
“Three dollars will get you an extra chocolate milk at Wagstaff!” Gene said, addressing his younger sister. “Do you have any idea how lucky you are? The milk at Huxley is very overpriced!”
“I’ll make you chocolate milk when you get home, baby!” Linda said. “With chocolate syrup, and milk, and—ooh! How ‘bout a silly straw?”
“This is why I love you, mom!”
Bob glanced warily at the clock. Tina had to drop Louise off at her school before she and Gene went to theirs, and Bob was worried they were growing short on time.
“Kids, you should probably get going.” He said.
Linda followed his line of vision and let her eyes land on the clock.
“Oh!” She said. “Your father’s right. You better get a move on, my little love bugs.”
She pulled each of her kids in one by one, planting noisy smooches on the tops of their heads. Because it was Valentine’s Day, Louise didn’t even wrinkle her nose at the affectionate gesture.
“Don’t worry, I’ll keep a running count of Tina’s casualties and get back to you.”
“Louise!” Tina glared.
“Sorry, sorry. Your driving’s great, T. Teddy’s mailbox might not agree, but—“
Bob didn’t listen to Louise finish her teasing. He was beginning to feel a little woozy with all of the talk of car crashes. He trusted Tina, but knowing that all three of his kids in would be barreling down the street in a car operated by a teenage driver was not easy on his nerves. He must’ve turned pale at the thought, because Linda stepped in.
“Louise, stop it before you give your father an aneurism. You gotta go, my funny Valentines.”
“Have fun at school, kids.” Bob said, relieved that the subject of vehicular accidents was out of the way.
Scattered goodbyes from the kids were heard as they headed out of the restaurant door, and Bob could still hear Louise groaning about the prospect of school once they were outside. Linda turned to him, concerned.
“Don’t let Louise get into your head with all of that crashing stuff, Bobby.” She said. “It was just one parking meter! And a mailbox, but—“
“I know.” Bob conceded. “She’s getting better. I mean, they wouldn’t have given her the license if she was that bad, right?”
Linda chuckled as they moved into the kitchen to begin prepping for their day at the restaurant.
“Pesto’s kid is definitely gonna let Tina down today, isn’t he?” Bob asked, pulling out a cutting board.
Linda rolled her eyes in disgust.
“Definitely. That kid’s a real piece of work, you know that?”
Bob sighed, remembering the feeling of being single in high school on Valentine’s Day. He imagined Tina at school, spending the day surrounded by boxes of chocolates and floral bouquets and then coming home empty handed.
“I hope Gene’s boyfriend doesn’t get him too many presents.” He said. “I mean, I wouldn’t want Tina feeling left out.”
Linda shrugged, giving him a knowing look.
“I wouldn’t worry too much about Tina, Bobby.” She said. “She’s pretty popular with those boys on the debate team! I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them asked her out today.”
She drew the last sentence out into a song.
“Ugh.” Bob said before he could stop himself. He reconsidered what he wanted to say when he saw Linda’s raised eyebrows.
“I mean, not ugh.That’s good. I hope one of them gives her flowers or something. I just don’t know how I feel about my daughter being popular with boys. ”
Linda didn’t seem nearly as bothered, but he guessed it was a dad thing. He would never stop Tina from dating, but it didn’t mean he always had to relish in the idea of it. He began slicing a tomato.
“Can you believe we have three teenagers?” Linda asked quietly, incredulous. “When did we get so old?”
Bob laughed. He asked himself the same question sometimes. He used to think that getting old would be scary or depressing, but he didn’t think it was so bad. It was sort of comforting, knowing that he’d made it so far. He had a happy life.
“I know.” He said. “I can’t believe Tina is graduating this year.”
“Bobby, don’t talk about that!” Linda said. “Unless you want us both to turn into a puddle of tears.”
She probably had a point. He would have to face that next step soon, but it wasn’t time yet. He wanted to appreciate his time with Tina while they still had her under their roof.
“Sorry.” He said.
They worked in silence for a few seconds, Linda washing a head of lettuce before handing it to Bob for him to chop. Bob wondered if Teddy would have any stories from them when he arrived.
“Hey, Bobby?” Linda said, disrupting the quiet.
He paused what he was doing to look at her.
“What? You okay, Lin?”
Linda shook her head as though brushing away his concern.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. I was just thinking...did you know it’s our twentieth Valentine’s Day together?”
Bob’s eyes widened. That number seemed huge. He thought back, thinking about all of the Valentine’s Days they’d shared. Tina was seventeen now, and he and Linda were together for about three years before they had her, which meant...
“Wow.” Bob said. “Twenty? That’s crazy.”
The number swirled in his head.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything.” He said. Linda didn’t flinch.
“That’s okay. I didn’t get ya anything either.”
Bob didn’t mind. Like Linda said, they were old. Way too old for ostentatious gifts or spectacles. That stuff had never been his thing, anyway. He would rather they just spend quality time together, away from work and without the kids.
“Do you want to go to dinner tonight?” He asked. We could go somewhere nice. Nice for us, at least.”
It wasn’t like they had to pay for a sitter any more, and that took a lot of the weight of date night off of his shoulders. Spending money on a nice dinner was frivolous, sure, but it was Valentine’s Day. Their twentieth Valentine’s Day. Linda seemed to consider his offer.
“Nah.” She said when she had finished pondering. “I kinda wanna stay in tonight. How about you?”
Bob shrugged. Squeezing into a dress shirt and wearing an uncomfortable tie just to eat overpriced pasta would never be his first choice. He loved staying in.
“Sure.” He said. “We could order takeout, maybe? And watch a movie after the kids go to bed?”
Linda grinned.
“I’ll trade you a back rub for a foot massage.” She said hopefully, batting her eyelashes exaggeratedly
Bob laughed at her cajoling.
“Fine.” He said. “That sounds like the perfect Valentine’s Day to me.”