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2014-12-28
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Save What Has Been Lost

Summary:

“Had them on the ropes?”

 

 

 

Steve pulled back his head in surprise at the old inside joke that wasn’t being used in the right context but his smile couldn’t have gotten any wider that Bucky even remembered the inside joke. “Yeah, I had them on the ropes.”

 

Suddenly there was a cacophony of throwing up noises and, “EW THE GRANDPAPAS ARE FLIRTING AGAIN! MAKE IT STOP!”

 


**
 


Steve has Bucky back and things are good. Bucky's not trying to kill him anymore, he's starting to remember things, he's fitting in well with the Avengers, and animated movies are kind of amazing. But why does contact with Steve make Bucky as red as a tomato? Why have Sam and Tony decided to give Steve the "Protective older brother" talk? And who the hell decided Bucky could be in charge of the remote?

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“Flower gleam and glow, let your power shine, make the clock reverse, bring back what once was mine.  Heal what has been hurt, change the fates design, save what has been lost bring back what once was mine.  What once was mine.”

Steve choked up as Rapunzel sang these words so sweetly healing Flynn magically and so beautifully.  He was not going to look at Bucky because if he did he was going to cry.

The gang had told him that animation had evolved so far since he went under and ever since Bucky came back to him he decided that maybe some fun cartoons would be something him and Bucky could do.  Plus, he was hoping that watching cartoons would help Bucky remember the cartoons they used to watch before the war.

Bucky had come to him one dark rainy night completely soaked with a bloody face, hair matted to his head, and his face full of a dirty beard.   He had let Steve bring him in and let him wash him like they did back in the day with a hot tub of water and a towel.   He had even let him shave his beard like when they were younger and Bucky learned he could grow a beard.  Everything thing was fine until Steve tried to go to bed and Bucky would not let him leave.  He had grabbed his hand and would not let him go to his room.

Steve had decided that sleeping on the couch wouldn’t be so bad.

He remembered his list of things he needed to get caught up on and decided he’d go through it with Bucky. 

Bucky never said anything and generally was a blank slate unless something triggered him (the freezer, the tub, cold water, the sound of electricity) then he turned murderous and Steve had some new scars where Bucky had successfully stabbed him.  Nothing serious just some on his arm and a slight wound on his side.

He was okay with this, he told Sam when he was over but Sam always gave him a look like he knew better.

He had decided that cartoons were best after realizing that he didn’t like where most of the themes most of the movies on the list had and decided that cartoons would be the best.

So far it had been good.  Bucky had even laughed and even teared up at some of the movies.  Steve didn’t say anything because he did the same thing.  Bucky had even asked to re-watch a movie, The Iron Giant, and Steve obliged most graciously.

Tangled had started off well and it was really good.  Steve was already enamored with the technology that had made such beautiful hair and skin and everything and he was so going to learn the songs on here (he didn’t care that Tony snickered at him when he worked out to Disney songs) but then Rapunzel did her reprised song and it was a like a sucker punch because suddenly he wished that he was Rapunzel and he could wrap himself and Bucky and sing the song and everything would be so much better.  They would be back in the 1940’s, Peggy and the Commandos would be alive and Bucky would be Bucky again.  

All that was just asking too much and looking at Bucky would just break his heart.

He said nothing as the movie went on.

*

Bucky had started to use the shower by himself and he had started to let Steve be by himself for longer than a minute.  Steve still hadn’t slept in his bed for a month but anything to get Bucky back was worth all the creaked necks and sore backs. 

They had started to watch Bob Ross on the suggestion of Sam and it was helping soothe both Steve and Bucky.  Not only did Steve get to watch a great painter paint but both him and Bucky were able to hear Bob Ross’ nice and soothing words.  It made it easier for both of them to face the day.

Steve was baking some cinnamon rolls that Sam’s mother had made the other day and he had frozen for a later date.  Sam said that he was sorry for all the food his mother made him give them but Steve was just glad that someone who clearly loved to bake had made them food just because they were Sam’s friends. 

Bucky came out covered head to toe in a black clothing and his black combat boots.  Steve wanted him to wear more civilian clothes but Bucky would have none of it.  He’d let Steve dress him than an hour later he would be back in all his black clothes. 

At least he was wearing clothes that fit him and didn’t make him look like a homeless person.

Bucky sat down across from him and watched him wash the dishes he neglected to do last night.  Steve had gotten used to his stares and silence.  His Bucky would have been filling the air with mindless chatter but this Bucky was silent and watchful.  Steve was okay with that.  Just knowing Bucky, his or not, was there made it easier to breathe most days.

Steve hummed to himself as he grabbed a bowl to scrub.  He almost dropped said bowl when a voice not angrily speaking Russian asked, “Why don’t you draw anymore?”

Steve put down the bowl and stared at Bucky in confusion.  He tried to stop his fast beating heart and swallowed nothing before shrugging.  “I don’t have anything to draw.”

Bucky stared at him with his piercing blue eyes assessing him as if trying to detect a lie.  After a moment he asked, “I remember, you used to draw all the time even when you had nothing to do.  There has to be something you want to draw.”

Steve looked down to the water and grabbed the bowl he had almost dropped and started to wipe it.  He didn’t want to talk about why he can’t draw anything.   After drawing Stark Tower he hadn’t been able to draw anything.  He had started to draw lines thinking if he started something he’d be able to draw something.  All he got were frustrated lines on a piece of paper.  He hadn’t tried to draw ever since finding Bucky was alive.  He just couldn’t.

“There’s nothing I want to draw, Buck.”

Bucky went quiet again and Steve finally put the bowl in the drying rack (dishwashers were amazing but the motions of washing dishes calmed Steve that the convenience of dishwasher could never give him) before looking over at Bucky.  Bucky had a far off look like he was trying to remember something. 

Steve wondered if he said something wrong when Bucky shook his head then looked at Steve and said seriously, “You should draw me Rapunzel.  I like her.”

Steve was not expecting that at all.  “Uh, I thought you like Iron Giant more?”

Bucky shrugged before sniffing the air.  “I do but I’d like you to draw her.  Your food is almost burning by the way.”

Steve jumped and went to the oven just remembering about the cinnamon buns and took them out, and okay they were just a touch more brown then they should be but they were still salvageable.   Steve went over and wiped his hands on his pants before getting the powdered sugar icing.  He topped the cinnamon buns then put the bowl down.  He looked over at Bucky then shrugged. 

“Okay, I’ll try but I’m not guaranteeing anything.”

Bucky shrugged.   “Okay.” 

Bucky grabbed a cinnamon bun from the still hot pan with his metal hand completely destroying it in the process.  Steve glared at him watching to see if he was going to put the still hot cinnamon bun in his mouth or not but Bucky just raised an eyebrow at him as he let the cinnamon bun cool on his hand before he took a bite of it.

Steve didn’t say anything but he had a small smile on his face and a warmth in his heart.  Maybe Bucky was getting better and maybe everything he was doing wouldn’t be for naught.

*

He was having the worst time ever trying to draw Rapunzel.  He was blaming the fact that she was a 3D animated character instead of his lack of wanting to draw.

He stared hard at the blank piece of paper before pushing it away and blowing out a frustrated sigh. 

Bucky had left with Sam to go for a little walk.  It had been the first time Bucky had left his side in about a month and a half.  Steve at first was happy because he finally had breathing room and he was finally alone but then all of a sudden ten minutes into being alone he realized he was indeed alone.  He hadn’t been completely alone since the night Bucky showed up on his doorstep and now he was missing his presence.

He was getting thoughts and usually with Bucky around he could pretend he didn’t have any but now that he was alone he was having them and he couldn’t ignore them.

He rubbed his eye and sighed heavily.  It was stupid.  He was stupid.  Bucky was okay and Sam was okay.  Nothing bad was going to happen on their quick trip to the mart down the street.

He was just being dumb.

He opened his eyes and looked down at the paper.  He promised Bucky he would try and he was.  He was letting him down but what was knew?

Steve started pinching his skin around his hands.  He knew they were going to scab but he needed a distraction.  Bucky was remembering things.  All sorts of nice things that they used to do like going down to the bars and dancing with some dames (well, Bucky would dance while Steve would talk up the other dames ear off to try and offset the fact they weren’t dancing) and even going to the science convention the night of his deployment.

He had been talking a lot more recently and Steve was glad.

Sort of.

He felt the sting as he pinched hard enough to draw blood.  Bucky was going to remember the fall.  He was going to remember how Steve literally let him down.  He was going to be so angry at him.  He didn’t even fucking try to find him and he should have.  He should have gone back even for a body but he didn’t and look what happened?

He made a mistake and it cost Bucky so much.

He didn’t want Bucky to hate him even though he understood if he did when he remembered.  He understood if Bucky wanted to hit him over and over again because it was Steve’s fault.  It was all of Steve’s fault and he deserved so much pain for what he had caused.

He didn’t want him to remember because they were getting so much closer and it was almost like old times.  Almost.

It was going to go away soon and it would be all of Steve’s fault.

Steve’s chest was constricting and he knew he wasn’t having an asthma attack but oh god it wasn’t any better.  He closed his eyes and picked at his hands more as hot tears fell down his cheeks.  He was having an anxiety attack he knew he was but he couldn’t stop the overwhelming sense of despair.  He was going to lose everything again and it was all his fault. 

He straightened up and wiped his eyes as he heard the door open. 

He was going to be okay. 

He knew he was lying to himself.  He knew he wasn’t going to be okay because he was still feeling his anxiety attack happening but he had to hide it.  No one could know how he felt. 

Sam always talked about talking about ones feelings to make oneself feel better.

He didn’t deserve to feel better.

He felt his stomach rolling and he felt like he was going to throw up but he put on a smiling face and pretended to be working on the drawing.

When Bucky entered the room he turned to him with a smile.

Bucky stared at him in silence like always and walked over to him and took his hand.  Steve knew what was coming and grabbed the paper and pencil with his free hand.  Bucky dragged him to the living room and made him sit down on the couch.  He didn’t let go of his hand though this time around and just stared at Steve as if he was trying to figure something out.

Steve turned around to see Sam smiling behind his hand. 

“Shut up.”

Sam raised both hands.  “I didn’t say anything.”

Steve smiled even though it was the opposite of what he was feeling.  “You didn’t have to your face said everything.”

Sam rolled his eyes before walking over and standing by him. “He did well.  He didn’t have any episodes and he actually interacted with the cashier.”

Bucky glared at Sam before looking back at Steve.

“I know, I know you can talk for yourself.  It’s just faster and easier this way that way Steve won’t be a motherhen and start freaking out.”

Steve rolled his eyes and felt his stomach tighten at the truth of Sam’s words.  “I’m not a motherhen and I don’t freak out.”

Sam just stared at him.  “Right,” he said as he dragged out the word longer than it should have, “and I’m not black.”

Bucky made a noise like a scoff and Steve turned his attention back to him.

Bucky looked unsure but he shrugged and mumbled.  “What? It was funny.”

Sam nodded before moving towards the door.  “I left the milk and the ice cream on the counter.”  He pointed his fingers into guns then ‘shot’ at them.  “See you guys later.”

Bucky awkwardly waved his hand at Sam as Steve waved with his free hand with a soft goodbye. 

Steve jumped as Bucky took his waving hand and started to roughly examine it.

“Bucky what the hell are you-“ He was interrupted as his fingers were being shoved into his face.   “Bucky what are you-“  He stopped when he realized it was his hand that he was picking at.

Bucky glared at him then asked.  “What’s wrong?”

Steve couldn’t look Bucky in the eyes as he tried to take his hand away.  Bucky held fast though and repeated, “What’s wrong?”

Steve chest felt so tight and he couldn’t breathe but he couldn’t tell that to Bucky.  He couldn’t.  He put his back against Bucky even though it twisted his arm in the most awkward way possible.

“Nothing.”

“Liar.”  Bucky pulled Steve so hard that Steve went toppingly backwards on Bucky’s chest.  Bucky looked down at him and waved his hand in his face. “What’s wrong?”

Steve shook his head and tried to get out of his hold but Bucky put his metal arm around his chest and he couldn’t move.

“Let go Buck I can’t breathe. I-“

Suddenly his hand is released and Bucky has his human hand on his heart.   Bucky turned him around then with his other head started pushing his head towards Bucky’s chest.

“Bucky what are-“

He heard the rabid thumping of Bucky’s heart then Bucky’s frantic, “Breathe Steve. Breathe.”

Steve tried to fight Bucky for a second but that’s when he realized that Bucky was remembering his asthma attacks.  When they couldn’t get to his medicine Bucky always held him like this while his asthma attacked.  It always hurt and eventually his mom would come and help him but it always was so terrible for him and Bucky.

He didn’t fight after that and let himself listen to the thumping of Bucky’s heart.

“Shhhh Steve. Shhhhhh.”

Steve wasn’t making a sounds and he didn’t understand until he felt his tears start to soak Bucky’s t-shirt.

He tried to pull away but Bucky held him closer.

“It’s okay Steve.  I’m here.  I’m here.”

That was the problem.  He was here and soon he would leave.

Bucky wouldn’t let him go so he had no other option but to cry in his shirt.

Steve hated himself even more as Bucky soothed him just like he used to when they were younger.  He feel asleep to the sound of Bucky humming an Irish lullaby his mother always sung to him when he was sick.

He loved and cherished every second Bucky held and comforted him because soon it would all be crashing down.

*

“You guys are absolute crap at poker.”

Bucky laughed as he lost all his chips to Natasha.  “I’ve been under the weather for 70 odd years, you try keeping your poker skills up to par during all that time.”

The others laughed but Steve felt himself frown harder.  He tried to smile when Bucky looked at him but he knew his smile was tight.

“What I’m surprised is that old Red, White, and Blue here is still in the game.”

Steve glared at Tony’s smirk.  He had somehow gotten a toothpick and was chewing it like in the Westerns Bucky and him had tried to watch but had to stop at the amount of racism it had in them.

“I don’t know why you always think I can’t do anything just because I’m 97 years old.  They did have poker when the dinosaurs roam the Earth, you know?”

Everyone laughed at that and Tony even gave him an approving smile.  “I see you’re taking your age in stride.”

Steve shrugged before taking the deck from Natasha (who he believed was cheating but he had no proof) and shuffled the deck. 

“It’s that are I start yelling at kids to get off my lawn and since I don’t own one I’m sticking with being okay with my age.”

Everyone laughed again and Steve felt at peace for just a second as he shuffled the deck three times more before holding it out to Sam.

Sam raised an eyebrow at that but he cut the deck before giving it back to him.

Steve handed the deck to Bucky and Bucky did the rest.  Bucky had never been good at poker.  He was always too busy talking and making jokes to keep track of what he had.  He was always better off as the dealer. 

Bucky looked at Steve before he dealt the cards.

Steve had always been the one to win at poker.  Before the serum guys wouldn’t take Steve seriously and would get so cocky and reckless with their money.  Steve was always able to read people better than Bucky only because he was always watching people and he could pick up on people’s tells better than Bucky.  Steve didn’t know why Bucky was so bad now since all he did was watch them for the last four months. 

Steve looked at his cards and figured he could either have a good hand or a really sucky one depending on the cards that would be dealt next.   He looked around and nobody gave anything away as to be expected.  He watched as Bucky laid down a card not minding one bit what the card actually was but how the others reacted. 

Sam was the easiest to read and so far he didn’t show anything yet.   His hand must have potential. 

Nat had a cold stone face on but Steve looked at her hands.  When she had something good her left pinkie slightly twitched to the left.  Her picky didn’t move an inch.

Clint was playing for the fun of it and didn’t care what he had.  He barely ever looked at his cards as he was cracking so many jokes and ‘burning’ people to care.  He was the wild card out of the bunch.

Thor had been playing but after a while had become withdrawn and had decided to go out for a walk instead.

Steve never asked but he knew it probably had something to do with his brother.

Now Tony was the hardest to read by far.  He had used fake tells to trick Steve and the others to throw them off of his trail.  Steve had lost too many times to Tony in this one game and he was on mission from God to beat the living tar out of Tony.

After realizing how many fake tells the guy had finding out Tony’s one real tell was frustrating because it was so obvious that he had over looked it when he was trying to tell one fake tell from the next. 

He hit not even looking at the other card he got.  The others were staring at him and his reaction.  Steve didn’t much care.  It wasn’t a tactic more than a bit of recklessness.  He won more out of his good luck at reading people then he ever was at getting the perfect hand.

The second card was thrown down and Sam shook his head as he folded.  Steve didn’t even look at his discarded cards as he watched the others.

Still nothing from Nat and Clint had taken a leaf from his book and hadn’t looked at his cards. 

Tony, well, Tony was Tony.  “Are you kidding me?  Cap is so confident in his breeches that he isn’t looking at his cards?”  Tony gave him a suspicious look.  “Tell me your secrets Cap.”

“You wish, Stark.  Hit or stay?”

Tony had actually jumped.  “Cyborg is sassy me now?  What has the world come to?”  When Bucky didn’t say anything but just gave him a leveled look in return Tony sighed and said, “Hit.”

Bucky nodded and gave him a new card before looking at Steve. 

Steve glanced down for just a fraction of a second and shrugged as he said, “Stay.”

Bucky just nodded.

Steve wanted to smile because Nat was making small almost indiscernible counter clockwise circles on her knuckles.  She was getting worried.

Bucky let down the last card. 

Clint finally looked at his cards and cursed as he folded.  Steve understood why when he saw he had literally nothing in his hands.  Steve new Clint could poker face with the best of them but sometimes he got too reactive when he was realized what he had and thus gave too much away. 

Bucky turned to Nat and stared at her waiting to see if she would stay or fold.  She looked at her cards before waving her hand.

It was Tony’s turn and he stared hard at his cards then at Steve then back to his cards.  He drummed his fingers on the table for a second before proclaiming he was going to stay.

He stayed.

They flipped over their cards and the groans of despair could be heard for miles.

Steve had won yet again and this time he had taken out Tony in one go.   They didn’t play by regular poker rules where you placed a bet and doubled down or whatever.  If you lost to Steve you got to give him half of your chips on the basis he was Captain America.  If he got a royal flush he got your entire set of chips.

Tony was so pissed yet so impressed with Steve that he stormed off then not two minutes later came back with a Captain America foam finger and was cheering him on as Nat gave all her chips to Steve.

Nat just glared hard at Steve and threw up her hands.  “I’m done.  I just got bamboozled by Captain America.  That’s just wrong.”

Sam nodded then told them he was out. 

Clint whined as he said that he wasn’t going to play and get his ass whooped by Captain America either. 

Steve didn’t say anything as he got his earnings and just smugly smiled at the group of losers that were his friends.  He turned to Bucky and he was pleasantly surprised to find him smiling as well.

“Had them on the ropes?”

Steve pulled back his head in surprise at the old inside joke that wasn’t being used in the right context but his smile couldn’t have gotten any wider that Bucky even remembered the inside joke.  “Yeah, I had them on the ropes.”

Suddenly there was a cacophony of throwing up noises and, “EW THE GRANDPAPAS ARE FLIRTING AGAIN! MAKE IT STOP!” 

Steve mockingly glared at all of them before laughing at all the group’s disgusted faces.

“Alright, everyone you have all over stayed your welcome now please get the hell off my floor.”

Clint threw a peanut at Steve’s head that Bucky caught with his metal hand.  He crushed the peanut enough that the outer layer came off easily and he was able to eat the meat of the nut easily.  Clint just stared in horror at the aftermath of his devastated peanut.

“I’m out.  You geriatric grandpas scare the living shit out of me. Nat?”

Nat just nodded before taking the corpse of the nut shell and successfully hitting Steve in the head.  Steve guffawed at her cold and even, “Poopyhead,” as she walked off with Clint.

He was so glad he had bothered her into watching Lilo and Stitch.

Tony looked put out and sighed sadly.  “Well, Bruce has had too much peace in the last few hours.  Time to wake up the beast.”

He was out of the room before Steve could ask if he was speaking metaphorically or not.

Sam just shook his head and yawned wide before looking at his watch.  “Goddamn.  I hadn’t stayed up this late since college.”

Steve leaned to his far right to look at his microwave clock and saw that it was only midnight.  He raised an eyebrow at Sam which Sam promptly flipped him off.

“Shut up, Steve.  Not all of us can hang with the elderly okay?”

Bucky laughed at that and shook his head as he started to clean up around them. 

Steve didn’t even realize he was just staring at Bucky until he heard more than saw Sam’s snapping fingers in front of his face.

“Woo-hoo Cap.  Come on I need to speak to you.”

Steve shook his head and felt the back of his neck heat up at the shit eating grin Sam was giving him.  “Uh, yeah.  I’ll just-yeah.”

He got up and followed Sam out but he laughed so hard as he heard Bucky say, “A verbal protégé, you are Rogers.”

As they neared the elevator Sam suddenly stopped a few feet from them and gave Steve a look before looking back where Bucky was no doubt cleaning up a total mess.

“You need to tell the guy you’re in love with him.”

Steve was suddenly tongued-tied and couldn’t even get the words to defend himself before Sam went on.

“You need to tell him and you need to do it soon.  I mean, he’s not dumb Steve.  He probably knows your feelings but because of his sense of self-worth he hasn’t pushed the issue.”  He looked Steve square in the eye and said, “Push the issue.”

Steve didn’t know what to say as Sam just walked away and turned to use the stairs instead of the elevator.

“Stevie, I’m not cleaning this whole place by myself.  Get your ass in here.”

Steve shook his head and wet back to help Bucky.

He didn’t say anything to Bucky about what Sam had just said but he watched Bucky after that.  He watched Bucky’s reactions to his reactions to things and, well-

He was a smart guy and he knew Sam was fucking brilliant in his own right but damn was he way off the mark this time around.

**
“Where’s my Rapunzel drawing?”

Steve dropped his pencil that he had been using to fill in the damage report from the last time they had saved New York.  He knew why it fell to him to do the report but seriously he was so done with being the leader of the team of bizarre people that even though they tried to save as much property and lives he still ended up in a pile of paperwork to deal with after. 

He looked up and blinked as he totally forgot what Buck had just asked him.

“What?”

Bucky rolled his eyes as he set down a sandwich that from what Steve could tell was a turkey sandwich on rye.  He didn’t even like rye.

“I said where’s my Rapunzel that you promised you would try to make.”

Steve blinked at the sandwich then tried to grab it to eat when Bucky slapped his hand away. 

“Don’t touch my sandwich.  Now where is my pic?”

Bucky was soaking up the future like a sponge and had started to use more slang.  Steve felt uncomfortable using slang because everyone assumed he was this backwards dinosaur that had never used slang ever in his life.  Sure it was fun seeing people’s reactions when he used it but when it was just him and Bucky he just tried not to use it altogether.

He looked up and asked, “Where’s my sandwich?”

Bucky just gave him his most done expression before throwing up his hands.  “Are you kidding me?  You’re too distracted by my sandwich that you can’t answer my question?”

Steve just blinked again before shrugging in a very exaggerated manner.

Bucky stared at him in disbelief then mumbled, “Typical,” before rolling his eyes and made Steve a ham sandwich on whole wheat.  Steve smirked as he watched Bucky throw on tomatoes and lettuce and pickles on his sandwich even though Bucky thought all those ingredients didn’t belong on the sandwich but put them on anyways just because he knew Steve liked them.

He didn’t say it but he heard Clint’s voice in his head say loudly the word, “Whipped,” with a spectacular whipping noise to follow.

The smirk disappeared when Bucky turned around and thrusted the plate towards Steve.  “Here’s your damn sandwich now tell me where’s my pic at.”

Steve looked at his sandwich and fiddled with it checking to see if Bucky remembered he didn’t like any condiments on his sandwich before shrugging and taking a bite.

He said around his bite spewing a few bread crumbs and a bit of meat on the table, “’Aven’ shtarded.”

Bucky pulled away from him in disgust before grabbing a towel from the sink and throwing it at his face.  “Wash your face you caveman.”

Steve tried to smirk around his big bite but he probably looked ridiculous instead.  He had a feeling Bucky still new he was smirking and glared at him as he sat down and grabbed his own sandwich.

“You promised you’d try at least.  It’s been been a while.”

Steve took a moment then swallowed his big bite before putting his sandwich down.  Okay, he had started and he could totally tell Bucky this and get him off his back but he wanted to actually get this done.  He wanted to draw Rapunzel but he just simply couldn’t. 

He wasn’t going to tell Bucky that though.

“I’ll get it done when I get it done.  Don’t worry you’re lovely little head over it, sugarpuss.”

He laughed so hard as Bucky spit out the bite he just took and almost choked on it.  When he saw the absolute menacing glare Bucky was sporting he decided that even though he loved living laughing at Bucky was so worth it.  Even after all these years Bucky still hated the word sugarpuss which when Steve thought about it was more or less the equivalent of sweetface or pussycat from what he could tell from context clues when Tony used them to show that he’s simultaneously older and younger then Steve and Bucky.

Again, he never really used slang but pissing off Bucky was so worth it.

“Call me, sugarpuss again and see what happens.  You forget I know where you sleep, Rogers.”

He was right.  After a while Bucky had stopped making Steve stay with him twenty four seven and had let Steve sleep in his own room.  Steve never knew where Bucky slept since when he went into the spare room there was no sign anyone had ever set foot into it.  When he came into the living room, though, at all hours of the night sometimes Bucky was there and other times he wasn’t. 

Even with this information Steve just smiled wide and leaned in real close and said with as much of a taunting tone as he could muster, “What are you gonna do about it, sugarpuss?”

Steve was expecting Bucky to say something sarcastic and maybe punch him in the arm or push his face at least.  What he was not expecting was for Bucky’s eyes to go to his lips and have him watch them.  Suddenly Bucky’s red in the face and he’s taking his sandwich away into the living room and cursing at Steve for being an idiot.

Steve just blinked in surprise.  He slowly turned and saw Bucky turn on the TV.  He didn’t even look at him when Steve's least favorite show came on, it was a cooking show with a man with whack-a-doodle hair that just got on his nerves, and said, “Hey, look Steve you’re favorite show is on.”  Bucky then proceeded to watch the program.

Steve just stared at Bucky and watched.  He was fascinated at how red Bucky’s face got by the minute the more he stared at him. 

Finally, Bucky put down his sandwich and glared hard at him and asked, “What are you looking at?”

Steve shrugged and said quietly, “Nothing,” before turning around and eating his sandwich.

He probably looked cool, calm, and collected as he ate his sandwich but his mind was going a mile a minute trying to dissect Bucky’s reaction. 

When he was done he put his plate away and sat right next to Bucky.  He felt Bucky tense up as he moved to grab the channel changer (the amount of times he’s gotten into a fight with Clint about calling it a channel changer and not a remote was an embarrassing high amount) but Bucky pulled it away before he could get it.

He groaned and threw himself back on the couch and whined loudly. 

“Bucky I don’t wanna watch this.”

He looked over at Bucky gave him his best pout.  All it got him was a laugh and shake of the head.

“Not even Rogers.  I got the remote so you’re just SOL.”

Steve hadn’t heard that acronym before and was gonna ask but Bucky shook his head as the troll man came back on.  “It means Shit Out of Luck.  Now stop your whining and get some ideas on what we could make or where to go out to eat.”

Steve just sighed very loudly before getting comfortable in his seat.  As the show went on he tried to subtly move closer and closer to Bucky without him noticing.  It was nearing the last half of the show when he finally touched their thighs together. 

Bucky immediately froze up.  Before that Bucky was totally fine eating his sandwich watching the blonde troll man eat his way into another plate of food, but now he was simply stopped moving.  He even stopped chewing. 

Steve let their thighs touch just for a moment longer before moving himself so he could put his feet on their coffee table.  He acted like he wasn’t paying all his attention on Bucky and he hoped Bucky didn’t realize what he was doing.  He was testing something out and if he was wrong he was unnecessarily testing Bucky’s personal space boundaries. 

Steve looked at his sandwich and through his peripheral watched Bucky and simply asked, “Are you gonna finish that?”

Bucky finally swallowed what he had in his mouth before turning to Steve with a half-hearted glare.  “On your life, Rogers.”

Steve shrugged then outstretched his arms up then across the back of the couch.  Bucky stiffened up again but when it looked like Steve was once again watching the monstrosity of a TV show he relaxed just a tiny bit that his back touched Steve’s arm. 

Steve didn’t say anything but when he tried to snatch Bucky’s sandwich again and Bucky full on glared at him before punching him in the arm and calling him a vulture he saw how red Bucky’s face was.  He didn’t say anything but he noticed how after another horrific half hour with the troll man describing diner food that Bucky had actually relaxed enough that he was actually leaning in towards Steve.  He didn’t say anything that when they’re legs touched again Bucky didn’t stiffen up but just kept watching another cooking show.

He wouldn’t say anything but maybe Sam was a right.

**
“Hey, Cap can I talk with you for a second?”

Bucky and Steve shared a surprised look. 

Bucky had found a place amongst Tony’s lab.  Even though Steve thought the sounds of Tony making stuff would trigger Bucky he had actually told him the sounds reminded him of the garages his father had worked at in his youth. 

Steve wanted to remind Bucky that his dad didn’t work for the garages for that long but he thought it best for Bucky to remember things on his own time whether than him overwhelming him with memories he might never remember. 

Bucky had been weary of Tony and Tony hadn’t been the most enthused at having another super soldier with an even more shady past living in his tower.  Steve and Tony had had a massive fight over Bucky but with the help of Pepper and even Colonel Rhodes Tony had been swayed into letting Bucky stay under heavy surveillance.

Steve didn’t know how and he didn’t know when but Tony and Bucky had struck up an unlikely friendship.  When Bucky wasn’t with Steve he was most likely in the lab with Tony.  Steve didn’t know what he did in there and he asked Bucky but all he did was shrug at his question.

Steve never pushed the subject but he was always curious on how Bucky could get along so well with Tony while the two of them had a tumultuous relationship at best.

They had just been leaving to go out to one of the restaurants on the troll man’s show.  Bucky had been bugging him in the most subtlest of ways to get him to go.  A pamphlet left on his side of the couch, the episode being played constantly when they watched TV together, Bucky getting Nat, Sam, and Clint to all talk about the place when they hung out together. 

If Steve wasn’t as smart as he was he would have totally missed the signs but as it was he had just rolled his eyes at the tenth time of Bucky playing the stupid episode before declaring they were going to go to the place saving the world and paperwork be damned.

Steve looked at Tony and shrugged.  “Okay,” he turned back to Bucky and said, “Wait for me at the front.  I’ll be there in a while.”

Bucky nodded back before waving a goodbye to Tony.

Tony waved back but Bucky had already turned around.  He let his wave die slowly before turning a sharp eye on Steve. 

“I’m going to be blunt here, Cap.  Do you have romantic feelings at all towards Bucky?”

His head reeled back in surprise and his face heated up making him feel like he had one of the fevers he always seemed to have back in the day.  He was going to tell Tony to mind his own business when Tony just waved his hands in front of his face.

“Let’s skip over the indignation comments and move to the heart of the problem.  Bucky seems to have either recently developed feelings for you or he has remembered his feelings.  I don’t know.  Being how we’re used to teasing you guys about liking each other I didn’t care until I realized how deep his feelings were for you.”

Steve could only sputter out nonsense.  He wanted to say something but his brain was just dead at this moment.

Tony watched him for a second before rolling his eyes, “Just know that when he’s not distracting my bots he talks about you.  He talks about his memories when he can remember them.”  He got into Steve’s face and said with so much conviction that Steve had to take a step back.  “Even though he killed my parents I know what it’s like to be taken hostage and be torn apart and put together again.  To be manipulated by people into doing horrible things when you’re left in the dark.  If you do not have feelings for him let him know sooner rather than later.  And if you do,” he took a step back, “Don’t fuck it up.  Don’t wait.  Live your life when you can, Rogers.”  He took three steps but stopped and said, “And if you break his heart I will burn you, Rogers.”

Steve was left in silence as Tony walked away and started talking in his tech jargon that no matter how Bucky explained things to him he just didn’t get it.

He slowly walked backwards before smartly about facing.  Getting into the elevator was easy and usually he wouldn’t mine the silence but now all is thoughts were thinking on Tony’s words.   By the time he exited the elevator he was already forming a plan.

“What did Tony want to talk to you about?”

Steve shrugged with a smile before opening the door for Bucky making Bucky glare at him.  “You know Tony.  He’s just threatening my life veiled behind deprecated humor.”

Bucky went through the other door and waited impatiently for him outside.  Steve laughed at his disgruntled look before following him out.

“I don’t know why you guys always butt heads.  I think you’d get along if you guys weren’t both running your mouths.”

Steve just rolled his eyes.  Bucky kept trying to get him to hang out and get along with Tony.  He would try to be better but he wasn’t going to hug the guy anytime soon.

They had their now familiar argument over his and Tony’s relationship as they walked all the way to the restaurant. 

Steve was laughing so hard at something Bucky said when he was stopped abruptly by a strong hard arm.  He opened his eyes and looked at Bucky in question as Bucky rolled his eyes then grabbed onto Steve’s forearm. 

“You were about to run right into that street light you moron.”

Steve looked to his side and realized that Bucky was right.  He felt himself warm up at that fact.

The only other time he had walked into a pole was because Bucky had been waving his hand to a dame head that he had dance with the night before ready to cross the street to talk to her.  Steve was seething because Bucky had promised it would just be a day out with just the two of them since he had been sick that whole week.  Bucky had laughed at him while he had glared his hardest at his face and had walked away in a huff.  Bucky had forgotten the girl and had taken him out to eat afterwards laughing at his shiner that for once hadn’t come from a fight.

Bucky shook his head at his sheepish expression.  Bucky let go of his arm but before he really thought about his actions Steve grabbed onto Bucky’s hand.  Bucky stared at their hands and raised an eyebrow at Steve.  Steve saw he was blushing but he hadn’t pulled his hand away so he took that as a good sign.

“What?  My hand’s cold.”

Bucky just nodded his head giving him the most skeptical look.  “Right.”  Bucky didn’t let go but just lead Steve through the streets of New York to a restaurant Steve didn’t want to go to but went to humor Bucky.

Once again he heard Clint’s whipping noise in his head.

**

Steve starred down at his piece of paper at a loss to do.  He knew he had to draw Rapunzel.  He had been procrastinating on it for some time now and he knew Bucky was getting antsy for his picture.  Not fifteen minutes ago Steve had been staring away at nothing when Bucky had brought in his pencils and papers and ordered him to draw if he was that bored. 

Steve didn’t even react to the pencil and papers and Bucky had walked away with a huff and an eye roll.  Five minutes later Steve had finally moved them over towards him.  After that he finally opened up his pencils and took them out and decided he needed to sharpen every last one of them.  It took him about five minutes to meticulously sharpen each and every pencil he had to a deadly point.  After that he sorted them by height.

Now he was staring at a blank piece of paper going to admit defeat when Bucky threw a big wad of newspaper at his head.

He looked over and Bucky said with a stern frown, “I want my picture.  Now draw.”

Steve didn’t know what to say to counter that other than to stick out his tongue. 

Bucky rolled his eyes but Steve saw the way his lips turn upwards just a little bit.  “Real mature Steve.”

“Real mature in throwing newspaper at my head.”

Bucky raised up his arms and said, “Whatever gets that big brain of yours moving.”

Steve just shook his head and looked back at the paper.  He sighed and took a pencil. 

He didn’t know what he was doing.  He didn’t have a picture reference of Rapunzel and he didn’t want to move to get his phone. 

“There are pics of Rapunzel behind the first page.”

Steve started in surprise but looked behind the page and like Bucky had said there were pictures of Rapunzel behind them.  He looked through them trying to see if any of them would give him some sort of inspiration. 

He looked up as he heard music playing from the kitchen.  Bucky pulled his now longer hair into a sloppy bun (Steve asked him why he didn’t cut it and Bucky had shrugged and simply said scissors before imitated his head exploding.  Steve just nodded and didn’t mention it again.) and looked at his phone as he said, “I figured you needed some music to get the creative juices flowing and I need something to listen to while I do the dishes.”  He played with his phone of a second before the sounds of Prince Ali started playing.  Bucky looked up and asked, “Disney alright?”

Steve nodded his head.  “Yeah, it’s fine.”

Steve looked back at the paper and listened to Robin Williams’ voice tell him about the great Prince Ali.  By the end of the song, he still had nothing.  He sighed and was going to ask Bucky if it was okay if he could draw something else when You Got a Friend In Me started to play.  It wasn’t the song itself that caught his attention but the way Bucky first started to loudly hum it before he softly started to sing to the song. 

Steve watched as Bucky wiped down the counters cleaning them before getting the drying rack and putting it over the clean counters.  For whatever reason, watching Bucky softly sing as he filled the right sink with hot water and soap was just fascinating to Steve.  He laid down his head into his hand and just watched as Bucky put the dirty dishes they had accumulated into the hot soapy water.

Steve’s eyes slowly trailed down from Bucky’s shoulders to his tight pert ass.  He watched as Bucky started to sway his hips back and forth just slightly.  He couldn’t stop the little smile on his face.

Ever since the day Tony talked to him Steve had been pushing his and Bucky’s personal spaces.  After they had held hands (no intertwining of fingers) they had a normal time eating out and had walked back like they usually did.  Later when they watched another episode of troll man (why Steve didn’t automatically get the channel changer when they first got home is one of the questions Steve asked himself every time he has to hear the troll man talk about how X, Y, and Z food tasted absolutely amazing) Steve had gotten up the courage to lay his head down on Bucky’s lap.

Bucky had stiffened up and Steve wasn’t exactly Mister Relaxed and he thought he had made a big mistake with just following his gut instinct instead of thinking of a plan.  He was going to get up and try to forget he had ever done anything when Bucky had put his shaky metal hand on Steve’s head. 

Steve had frozen in spot and he wasn’t even sure if he could breathe ever again when Bucky slapped his arm hard with his fleshed out arm and told him, “Relax idiot or get off.”

Steve had laughed while letting out the breath he had been holding in.  He had said something back but he couldn’t remember afterwards but Bucky had laughed at him before shoving him slightly.  Steve had shifted a bit before laying back down in a more relaxed position than before.

He didn’t mind watching the troll man stuff his face as Bucky played with his hair. 

He had even fallen asleep and hadn’t woken up until hours later when the infomercials were playing.  He had looked up while rubbing the sleep from his eyes to see Bucky had his head thrown back and was snoring up a storm.  Steve had laughed before getting up.  Bucky had shot up right away successfully hitting his head against Steve’s. 

They had both groaned before starring at each other and laughing for no apparent reason.  They had smiled at each other not saying anything as they stared into each other eyes. 

Steve was reluctant but he was still feeling tired and had gotten up to go to his bed.  He had stopped though right at the doorway and looked back.  As he stared at Bucky he had the sudden urge to ask him to sleep with him like when they were kids.  Bucky on his right staying up longer than him as Steve laid on his chest and fell asleep listening to his heartbeat.  He had even opened his mouth to say something when at the last moment he had chickened out and shook his head before saying good night.

Bucky had looked disappointed and had said good night back before changing the channel to something else.

Steve still didn’t know where he went or slept but he still wasn’t going to ask.

Now he was thinking about how nice Bucky’s butt was and had really always been. 

Bucky suddenly turned around and Steve felt his whole face, ears, and neck heat up as he quickly looked down and started making random lines to look like he had been drawing.

At Bucky’s snort he knew he had failed at that endeavor. 

When Bucky didn’t say anything for a while Steve looked up and saw he went back to washing dishes.  He quickly looked down at his ass before sudden inspiration struck him.  He flung the paper he had just drawn on away to be used later for whatever scrap purposes and gotten a fresh new paper out and quickly started drawing.

**

He jumped when he suddenly felt a presence behind him.  He stopped drawing to look up to see Bucky staring at his paper.  He smirked when he saw the raise of the eyebrow and Bucky’s mouth open wide in shock.

“You did not just draw what I think you just drew.”

Steve looked down and made a line more pronounced before saying, “Yeah, I did.”  He picked up the paper and shook it to get the eraser shavings off it and held it out to Bucky.  “Here’s the pic I owe you.”

Bucky took the picture with a prune looking hand (Steve looked behind him and saw the dishes were done meaning he had been drawing longer than he realized) and stared at it. 

It was a drawing of Rapunzel drawing Eugene aka Flynn Rider as he played with three little boys with a ball.  What Bucky was staring at was that Rapunzel had drawn a naked posing Eugene with buns of steel with an absolute smirk that shouldn’t look natural on her face but did with Steve’s skills.

Bucky covered his mouth and it looked like he was trying not to laugh.  Steve smiled wide as Bucky’s shoulders shook with his laughter.  He felt so much pride when he saw the tears Bucky was trying not to cry as his face turned an almost worrying red.

Steve simply asked, “Like it?”

Bucky completely lost it and Steve had to grab onto the picture before he dropped it on the floor.  Steve just watched in absolute awe at how Bucky had doubled over and was silently laughing with actual tears coming down his face.

Steve chuckled at Bucky’s reaction before shaking his head.  He was going to say something to hopefully make Bucky lose his shit again but JARVIS right then said from out of nowhere that he was needed at once in the conference room they had for business purposes.

Steve didn’t want to miss Bucky losing his shit but Bucky made him leave with tears and some words between his laughter.  Steve decided to leave Bucky to his laughter and left to face whatever was waiting for him in the conference room.

**
He was so pissed.  He missed out on Bucky’s laughing fit for Tony to ask him if it would be okay if he could have just a tiny bit of blood for ‘science’ reasons. 

He had just glared and said no before leaving the conference room in cold silence. 

He had ridden back in the elevator in silence before getting angry and got off two floors before his floor and simply walked up the stairs.  It didn’t wind him down like stairs used to before the serum but it gave him something to do as he stomped back to his floor. 

He didn’t slam open the door but oh god did he want to.  He stomped into his floor and bypassed Bucky who was drying the dishes with a towel then putting them away. As he watched him stomp away and looked up at Steve’s expression Bucky put down the towel and cup he was drying.

“What’s wrong?”

Steve waved his hand before going over to the couch and turned on the TV.  He quickly flipped through the channels just wanting something to do.

“Nothing.  Just Tony being an idiot.”  He wasn’t even seeing anything as the channels became a blur.  He didn’t stop changing them until he felt Bucky’s cool metal hand on his.  He stopped channeling and closed his eyes as he took a deep breath as he tried to calm himself down. 

“I don’t know why Tony bother’s you so much but you need to calm down.”

Steve was about to snap at Bucky but when he opened his eyes Bucky was giving him the look and he shut up.  It wasn’t a disapproving look or a mad look it was just. . .well, a solely Bucky look.   He didn’t know how else to explain it but he always just shut up when Bucky gave him that look.

Bucky took the channel changer from his hand and put it on the table.   He turned back and grabbed onto Steve’s hand and pulled him up.  Steve didn’t know what was happening as Bucky led him to his bedroom and then too his bed. 

Steve’s face flamed up and his mouth went dry as Bucky let go of his hand and went into the middle of his bed.  He laid down on his back and opened up his arms wide.

Steve didn’t know what to do or say but Bucky just said, “Come on.  You need to calm down and nothing really ever calmed you down more than listening to a heartbeat.”

Steve just sort of stood there not really processing that Bucky was in his bed and he was allowing him to lay on his chest to listen to his heart.

He was distracted from his thoughts when Bucky threw a pillow at his face.  He held his throbbing face and looked at Bucky in betrayal.

“Ow!”

Bucky rolled his eyes and held out his arms again.  “I’m not going to offer this up again if you don’t get over here soon.”

Steve glared at him petulantly before slowing entering his bed.  He didn’t know why it wasn’t more awkward but when he crawled up towards Bucky and when he laid his head down it was just so easy and just so simple.  He had done this most of his life and this was the one place he felt safe and at home.

Thumpthump. Thumpthump.

Steve closed his eyes and let himself listen to Bucky’s heart as Bucky slowly wrapped his arms around him.

They laid there in silence until he felt Bucky’s heartbeat picked up and his human hand start to sweat.  Steve furrowed his brow but didn’t open his eyes as he asked, “What’s wrong Buck?”

Suddenly Bucky’s speaking so fast that if Steve wasn’t paying attention before he sure was now to trying to understand what was going on. 

“I like you.  I mean, I like you more than just a friend if that’s what you’re going to ask. I don’t know when I realized it but suddenly I just knew.  I have a feeling that’s how it was back when I could remember everything.  I don’t know why but I always have memories of going out and getting girls for us but I never did anything with them.  I just never felt anything with them.  For a while I just thought I hadn’t met the right person, but then the war happened and I left.  I got captured and miraculously you became the superhero I always knew you were and suddenly I didn’t have you to myself anymore.  Everyone saw what I had all along and you weren’t just Steve from Brooklyn anymore you were Captain America and Cap was in love.” 

That’s when he paused.  Bucky had been running his hand through Steve’s hair the entire time but now his hands were still. 

“I understand if you don’t have feelings for me.  I just needed to say something.  Sam and the others have been saying I need to talk about feelings and I need to go after I want.  Well, I’m talking them out and I’m saying them to the person I want.”

Steve opened his eyes as he sat up.  He pulled away Bucky’s shaking hands with his.  Bucky wasn’t looking at him.  His heart had been beating a mile a minute throughout his whole speech.

Steve put a finger underneath Bucky’s chin so Bucky could look him in the eyes. 

“I like you too, Buck.”  He put the finger on Bucky’s chin on Bucky’s lips to stop him from saying anything.  “Yeah, and I mean like that.”

Bucky stared at Steve before shaking his head.  He pushed away Steve’s hand and said, “I don’t even know if I can have sex.”

Steve blushed because even though he did like looking at Bucky he had never really thought about having sex with Bucky.   Sex had never even entered his mind at all when he thought about his feelings for Bucky.

“Um-“

Bucky rolled his eyes and moved away from Steve as much as possible while folding his arms in front of him.

“Sorry.  I knew that would be a problem but-“

Steve shook his head and grabbed onto Bucky’s flesh hand.  “No, stop.  I-uh- just never thought about having sex with you before.”

The moment the words left his mouth Steve turned a violent shade of red and now he was the one pulling away and hiding his face.

“No that’s just want I meant! I meant-!”  All he wanted to do was disappear into a massive black hole.  “Ugh, I don’t know what I meant I just mean I don’t find you unattractive or anything I just never thought about us doing stuff and oh my god I sound like every horrible caricature ever made of me and-“

Bucky pulled apart his hands and looked at him with a smile and said, “Shut up Steve.  I get it.”

Steve stared at Bucky before he nodded his head.  “Okay.”  They stared at each other for a second before he asked, “Can I lay back down?”

Bucky rolled his eyes and opened his arms wide.  “Of course, meatball.”

Steve just softly snorted before laying down his head on Bucky’s chest again.

Thumpthump. Thumpthump.

Bucky’s heartbeat was back to normal and Steve felt his own heartbeat and breath slowdown in response.

“Did you love Peggy?”

Steve sighed.  He knew it was going to come up at some point.  It had to, he thought, because Peggy had been Bucky’s friend to, but most of his memories with Peggy were with Steve.  Peggy and Bucky just never hung out by themselves, but still Bucky had asked about the Howling Commandos and he even asked about Howard. 

Peggy’s turn was coming up and now it seemed was the time.

“Yeah, but with the war and everything I guess I just I never really thought about sex with her either.”

Bucky started to tap rhythm on his back with his metal hand.  It tickled a bit but Steve tried to ignore and to keep still.

“But I thought I remembered a time when DumDum asked you what you would do with Peggy and-“

Steve sighed and rolled his eyes.  “I was bluffing.  Everyone else had done a lot of things already especially DumDum that I just said something to get them off my back.”

Bucky said nothing for a while as he kept tapping his back.  Steve bit the inside of his cheek to stop from laughing.

“Did you ever fear that Peggy would hear what you said to the guys?”

Steve snorted.  “Of course, and I was terrified.  I hadn’t thought at the time of my actions and just spouted somethings out but afterwards I was realized what an idiot move I had made and was waiting for her to shoot me again.”

Bucky laughed.  “She so would have shot you.  I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have tried to stop her.”

Steve gasped and picked up his head to look at Bucky’s mirth filled eyes.  “That’s awful.  Then who would have bothered you?”

Bucky shrugged before pushing Steve’s head back onto his chest.  “I don’t know.  Maybe Peggy.  She was a fearless warrior if I ever saw one.”

Steve nodded his head before biting his cheek again but harder as the Bucky moved his hand down and was tapping onto a very ticklish spot.  “True.”

Steve had a lot of practice in keeping real still but when Bucky started tapping faster and lighter he couldn’t help but wiggle around and giggle.

Bucky stopped but he heard the smirk in his voice when he said, “Still ticklish I see.”

Steve pinched him on his side making Bucky jump in response before saying, “Shut up, jerk.”

Bucky laughed but stopped his tapping.  “Whatever, punk.”

They went into a silence and soon fell asleep with Steve soon drooling onto Bucky’s shirt and Bucky holding tight to Steve’s wide shoulders.

**

Steve had walked away from the game of Cards Against Humanity almost in tears as he got himself a can of soda. 

How anyone had ever thought he was just pure little ball of sunshine didn’t realize the sort of horrible people he surrounded himself with. 

He looked through Natasha’s cabinets for a cup (she always rearranged her cabinets because when she got bored she got really bored and she liked messing with people’s heads) when he felt a presence behind him. 

He turned to see Bruce behind him getting himself a ginger ale.  Bruce looked up and smiled as he asked, “Found the cups yet?”

Steve smiled and shook his head.  “Nope.”

Bruce nodded then opened a bottom cabinet by his foot and ah-ha’d. “Found them.”

Steve rolled his eyes as he held out a hand as Bruce bent down and got two glasses from the cabinet.  He gave one to Steve then hauled himself up. 

They both opened up their cans and poured their drinks in silence. 

Steve was going to leave when Bruce asked, “So, you and Bucky okay?”

Steve didn’t expect Bruce out of all the group to be asking about them.  Bruce had usually stayed to himself and didn’t get into things if he could help it.  The only times he volunteered his opinions on things were when it concerned science and if Tony was on the verge of blowing himself up.

He looked at Bruce and shrugged.  “We’re doing okay.  Why you ask?”

Bruce nodded his head and looked over towards the kitchen door that led to the living room where the rest of the team was laughing uproariously. 

“No reason.  I just noticed how close you guys are and was wondering if everything was ok.”  Bruce gave him a heavy significant look and Steve realized what he wasn’t asking.

He knew about him and Bucky.  They hadn’t labelled their relationship since they didn’t know what to label it.  They were still friends but they hadn’t done anything other than a heavy make out session and that was after they talked a lot about boundaries and where they felt comfortable with things.  It didn’t feel like they were anywhere near boyfriend status and significant other just seemed too. . .significant. 

They decided to let things be.

Steve took a sip of his soda before nodding.  “We’re doing okay.”

Bruce nodded back and started for the door. “That’s good to hear.”  He got to the front of the door before he said over his shoulder, “But if I were you I’d broadcast how well you guys are to the group sooner rather than later.”  He looked over his shoulder with a rare twinkle in his eye and said, “You know how stupid they are when they want to be.”

Steve just nodded his head and Bruce nodded back before leaving back into the room. 

Steve took another long sip of his soda before taking a deep breath.  He gathered up his thoughts then left to the room. 

He entered it and the first thing he saw was Thor slapping down his cards and proclaimed that this set of cards should finally win him a white card. 

Steve shook his head with the rest of the group.  So far Thor had been choosing nothing but the most logical choices and had been left in the dark in some of the more funny cards.  That didn’t deter him and he tried harder to win and to understand the jokes he didn’t get.  He had won one black card and he had admitted to Steve that he had just thrown something down to get rid of the card. 

Steve had shrugged and told him a win was a win. 

Steve walked over to Bucky who was still staring at his cards.  He sat down beside him and put his head on Bucky’s shoulder.  He looked over his cards and at the black card before pointing towards one.  Bucky huffed out a sigh before using that card. 

Steve smiled because he only did that when he had no idea what to put down. 

He looked up and saw the others staring at them before most of them looked away as Sam gathered the white cards.  He read out loud the black card then read the white cards.  At the end all he did was sigh as all of them were bad cards.

“I hate you guys.  I never get the fun ones.”

He picked Thor’s card and Thor threw up a fist in excitement.

“I suck at this game.”

Steve laughed and said into Bucky’s ear, “No, you just don’t want the others to know how horrible you are.”

Bucky tried to glare at him but ended up smirking and laughing.

“What are the love birds talking about over there?”

Steve turned to Tony who was looking at them like he was analyzing a particularly hard problem.

Before he could say anything Bucky got another black card and said nonchalantly, “Just whispering sweet nothings about you Tony.”

Tony smirked and asked, “Are these naughty sweet little nothings?”

Bucky looked at his cards and said easily, “Of course.”

Tony fist pumped the air and whooped out a laugh scaring Clint who was sitting right next to him and was most likely startled by the movement then the noise.  Steve looked and was correct in his assumption Clint didn’t have his hearing aid in.

“What?” He said loudly.  “What happened?”

Nat signed off quickly, “The lovebirds are thinking of having a threesome nest with Stark.”

Clint’s eyes widened and signed back, “Told you.”

Steve rolled his eyes before signing and saying, “We are not having a threesome with Tony or otherwise.  I’m a one person kind of guy.”  He looked at Tony and said with no remorse at all, “Sorry Tony,” then he put his arm around Bucky.

Everyone went quiet as they looked as Bucky turned to Steve with a surprised expression before turning pink when Steve kissed him on the cheek.

Chaos ensued right after that.

Thor stood up and almost over topped the table and was yelling how no one told him anything.

Clint hit Natasha hard on the shoulder and signed, “I fucking told you!”

Tony was smiling wide and happy.

Bruce just saved his ginger ale from falling when Sam got up and slammed his hands down and yelled, “I thought I was your wingman Steve?  Why didn’t I know any of this?”

Steve just stared at Bucky with the biggest shit eating grin while Bucky had the widest happiest smile Steve had seen on him in ages as he rolled his eyes and said, “You’re a moron.”

He agreed but at least he was his moron.