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Carlos is still adjusting to this new normal.
For months now, his apartment has become the gathering place for the members of the 126, the five of them - Paul, Marjan, Mateo, TK, and himself - sheltering inside to unwind from the truly bizarre outer world. They watch TV, play video and board games, eat, drink, joke, and let it all go. They’ve become a unit, a driving force through these uncertain times, something that they can all count on.
For Carlos, it means a lot that he gets to be a part of the team. Certainly, before he met TK and the new 126, he had struggled to find friends. The Blakes have always been welcoming, and he was happy to be there for Michelle during the past three years, but ever since leaving the academy, his focus has been on his job. It’s been lonely at times, but the struggle to seriously date in Austin oftentimes left him feeling even more alone, so he made his peace with it.
He’s so glad that he doesn’t have to do that anymore.
Carlos has always loved the feeling of being surrounded by people. Growing up in a large family means that every weekend included house-bursting-at-the-eaves gatherings, laughter and hugs around every corner. When he moved out of his parents house after college into a place of his own, he longed to create that same kind of home: a sanctuary for both himself and the people that he loves most.
Now, he finally gets to have it.
It’s just four of them today, gathered in secret while TK spends the day with his mom. Carlos, seated on his couch, looks around at the faces of his friends - his new found family - and can’t contain the smile that pulls at his lips, so happy to watch them banter back and forth, their bond from working together for more than a year clear in their jokes and casual conversations.
“No, you know what we should do?” Mateo yells, his arms gesturing widely. “We should get, like, a bunch of dogs together, and when he shows up, we can just let them loose so they can jump on him and lick him.” There’s silence as he looks around at them all, his eyes as wide as his excited grin. “What? TK loves when Buttercup jumps on him and gives him kisses!”
Carlos is the first to speak, his eyes sliding over to take in Marjan and Paul’s shocked faces. “Let me make sure I’m understanding you, Mateo,” he begins, sliding forward on the couch to give him a confused look. “You want to surprise my boyfriend, on his birthday, with an army of dogs, and then let them attack him the minute that he walks through the door?”
“With love!” Mateo cries, rising to his feet to make his point. “They would attack him, but with love!”
Carlos finds himself without words, but luckily Marjan finds it possible to speak.
“Probie, how about we avoid ‘attacking TK’ altogether at his birthday party, okay?” she says, her signature mix of judgment and laughter clear in her voice and the arch of her pencilled eyebrow.
Mateo lets out a huff, throwing his hands in the air. “You all never like my ideas!” he whines, turning away from them.
“You’re looking at this all wrong, probie,” Paul chimes in. Carlos can see the glint in his eye, and prepares himself for his next words. “It’s not that we don’t like your ideas, it’s just that your ideas are never good enough for us to like.”
There’s a pause before Marjan and Paul burst out in laughter, practically rolling around in their seats. Carlos’s heart grows watching them, along with the way Mateo shakes his head, backing away towards the short hallway to the bathroom. He miscalculates, backing into the wall and nearly tripping over the vase Carlos has placed there. Carlos rises from the couch, ready to help him, but Mateo manages to catch himself and the vase before he falls, his face bright red as he finally exits the room.
“Well, that just happened,” Carlos says, and Paul and Marjan’s laughter intensifies at his somewhat surprised and confused tone.
The party planning continues when Mateo rejoins them, Marjan and Paul making sure to pile on top of him with a hug when he takes his seat again. Carlos rises from the couch, grabbing the now empty plate of snacks to refill. He pats Mateo on the shoulder as he walks by, the man giving him a grateful smile at the gesture.
The conversation behind him fades away as he refills the snacks. Carlos loves to host and cook for his friends, and he’s happy that they give him so many opportunities to do so; it makes him think of his childhood, how his mother would spend all day in the kitchen, baking for members of his family. She always did it with a smile on her face, glad to be able to care for those she loved, and Carlos feels the same.
His phone buzzes in his pocket, and he pulls it out to find a text from TK.
Hey babe - mom wants to know if ur up for dinner later?
Carlos smiles, his heart racing at hearing from TK. They certainly don’t spend every free moment that they have together, but they love to be around each other. Even when they’re apart, it’s nice to know that TK’s thinking about him the way that Carlos is thinking about his boyfriend.
He’s just typing out a response, letting TK know that he would love to get dinner, when he hears a shout behind him.
“What do you mean you’re TK’s favorite?” Marjan yells, her voice sharp. “What could have possibly convinced you that that’s true?”
Carlos bites his bottom lip, his eyebrows raised as he waits for a response. It’s Mateo that speaks next.
“I… well, you know, I…” the probie stutters, and Carlos refuses to look behind him. He can clearly picture Mateo’s face as he tries to explain his reasoning.
However, the next words out of his mouth cause him to pause.
“Well, I’m definitely Carlos’s favorite!” the younger man suddenly yells, causing Carlos to freeze where he’s adding more vegetables to the plate.
“Sure, okay, probie,” Marjan scoffs, her sarcasm cutting sharply through the air around them.
“I mean, I was the one who knew about TK and Carlos first,” Paul says, jumping into the conversation. “And I was the one who hung out with him after work. If anything, I’m his favorite.”
“Well, now, wait a minute,” Marjan says, and Carlos can practically see the manicured fingers she’s holding up. “I have been supporting their relationship since I saw them together at the bar, and Carlos loves me. I’m definitely his favorite.”
“Guys, come on,” Mateo says, his tone dismissive. “Carlos and I have bonded in ways that you never could. I’m obviously his favorite.”
Silence falls then, and Carlos can feel six eyes fixed on the back of his head. A heat rises up the back of his neck, and he grabs the plate in front of him before he turns back to the group, a grimace on his face.
“I have more food,” he says, avoiding the current topic as he walks back towards the living room. The three pairs of eyes follow him as he places the food on the coffee table and takes a seat on the couch.
“Reyes, spill,” Marjan finally speaks, her eyebrow arched. “Who’s your favorite from the 126?”
Carlos blushes, his palms starting to sweat as they all continue to stare at them, each of their expressions equally hopeful.
“I’m obviously going to pick TK,” he says, shrugging as he grabs a carrot stick.
There’s a chorus of annoyed yelling, all three of them throwing their hands up in unison.
“No, no way,” Paul says, shaking his head. “He doesn’t count.”
“Yeah, he does things for you that we’d never be able to compete with,” Marjan smirks.
“Marjan!” Mateo cries, his face on fire again as his mouth drops open. Carlos has lost the ability to speak, but none of them seem to mind.
“What?” Marjan shrugs, looking down at her nails. “I’m TK’s favorite, and the boy’s got a big mouth when he gets on his Carlos train of thought.”
“Okay, okay,” Mateo says, jumping up and clapping his hands. “Well, if you get to be TK’s favorite, then you’re out of the running to be Carlos’s favorite. So, I win.”
“Excuse me?” Paul says, his jaw clenched.
“I can be both TK and Carlos’s favorite person, probie,” Marjan says, a smile pulling at her lips. “It just means I’m better than both of you.”
“You two are so ridiculous,” Paul says over Mateo’s noise of disagreement. “We all know that Carlos loves me the most, I don’t know why you’re even trying to argue.”
“Hey!” Carlos finally yells, finding his voice again. Silence falls between them, the three of them turning to face him again. “You are all my friends, and I love each of you equally,” he starts, his hands out to placate them.
“And obviously, TK is my favorite out of all of you, even if you want to count him out,” Carlos continues, reaching for the beer on the coffee table.
“But,” he says, unable to stop the smirk rising on his lips, “if I had to pick someone other than him, it’s no contest... Buttercup, all the way.”
He takes a swig of his drink as they all groan, the conversation now turning to who the station’s resident canine loves the most. It’s a conversation that constantly changes, and one that Carlos has heard a dozen times.
He sinks back into the couch, his heart pounding a little faster in his chest from the conversation. It makes him feel special, being the center of an argument about favorites among his friends. It makes him feel valued, like he’s important to each and every one of them.
It makes him feel loved.