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Clarke leaned her head against Bellamy’s shoulder, adjusting the blanket that was covering both of them as they watched their monthly movie. Her father owned an impressive collection of old Earth films, and ever since Clarke was a young girl she had looked to them longingly, wishing to understand their original planet more, even if through silly stories and unbelievable circumstances. When she was old enough, he had promised, she would be allowed to watch them all. After seeing a few of them, Clarke realized that she had been old enough for a while, but her dad had still put it off until she was fifteen. Part of her was grateful, because the first time she had seen one, Bellamy had been around. Now it was their tradition; at the beginning of each month they would watch a new one together and either enjoy or thoroughly criticize it.
“I think this is the first romantic comedy we’ve seen without a dog,” said Clarke through a mouthful of popcorn. “It’s a miracle--a Christmas miracle.”
“It’s not over yet,” said Bellamy with a smirk. “And what the hell is a Christmas miracle?”
“I don’t know, a miracle on Christmas I guess.”
“I still don’t understand this Christmas thing.” He grabbed his own handful of popcorn.
Clarke pointed at the screen and talked through her mouthful of popcorn. “See, they celebrate with a big tree and parties and gifts… and sing songs?”
“What the hell is this play thing then?”
“Now that I don’t know.”
“What was this one called again?”
Clarke tilted her head to look at the label scrawled across the film. “Love Actually,” she said. “Makes sense. It’s all about love. Love and no dogs.” Bellamy couldn’t help but chuckle at her adorable smile, no matter how misplaced it was.
“I don’t get why you hate dogs so much,” he said. “I would take a dog any day over half the assholes in this movie.” That wasn’t exactly fair to the movie; Clarke was really enjoying it but apparently Bellamy didn’t feel quite the same way. People also pissed him off more than her.
“I don’t hate them,” she said. “I’ve never met one. Maybe I would love them, I don’t know. I just don’t get why people used to have them. They used to be wild animals, then they were used to work on farms and guard cattle--that I understand. But after that? They are just creatures that cost you resources and take up your time. They have no real use except companionship, and that can be given by humans. It’s not worth what effort they take.”
“You’re heartless,” said Bellamy.
“Am not!” she cried. “I just think like a reasonable person.”
“You also think like a typical privileged person. If I didn’t know better and you were older, I would think you were on the council.”
“I don’t see that as an insult.”
“Sometimes it is worth making a choice for yourself, instead of the good of our people. There no point in extending our legacy if we can’t live with the decisions we made to get there.” They were silent for a moment, and Clarke finally thought to pause the movie.
“We aren’t talking about dogs anymore.”
“No, we aren’t.”
Clarke crossed her legs on the couch, turned toward Bellamy, and placed a hand on his. “It will be okay, Bell. It wasn’t your fault.”
He looked up slowly, and Clarke’s heart sank. She hadn’t meant to use that nickname; that was what Octavia had called him. The pain in his eyes reflected the salt she had thrown in his wound. “Yes it was,” he whispered. “I miss them both so much.”
Clarke wished there was something she could do. Part of the reason they sat here watching these movies was to forget about life here, and try to imagine what it was like on the ground, hundreds of years ago. Back then people didn’t get sentenced to death for the smallest of crimes; back then there was freedom and a way to escape. Now somehow the conversation had turned to the one thing Bellamy didn’t want to think about. Maybe the best solution was to just stop talking.
“Do you want to finish the movie?” asked Bellamy quietly.
Clarke nodded and clicked play. It resumed with the prime minister and Natalie making out behind the curtain. The image of the two finally kissing like that sent a feeling of warmth through her. She glanced at Bellamy, who was intently watching, and was overcome with desire. The age difference seemed so insignificant now, watching two adults decades apart being intimate. What was five years when it came down to it?
Bellamy laughed and turned to her slightly. “This movie is ridiculous. I mean--”
Before he could finish his thought, Clarke’s lips were on his. His reaction was surprise, and her heart sank when he placed his hands on her shoulders and pulled away.
“What are you doing?” he asked gently.
“Don’t you want this?” she shot back, heat still coursing through her veins. His eyes were deep beautiful pools that she wanted to dive into; his lips were plump soft cushions that she needed to kiss again.
His expression looked pained. “Of course I do.”
“Then kiss me.”
Without hesitation this time, he leaned in and placed his soft lips gently against hers. They kissed slowly, carefully, until Clarke felt a surge within her. Pushing him onto his back, she lowered her entire weight onto him, never parting from his lips.
It felt like home. She would remember this moment for the rest of her life; her first kiss with her first love and now her best friend.
The door opened, and they heard rummaging near the entrance. Clarke jumped off of Bellamy and they both sat up as fast as they could, trying to look inconspicuous. The movie was nearly over; they both sat in silence staring at the picture, even though they had missed a good fifteen minutes of it.
“Clarke, I’m home!” called her dad from across the room.
Clarke looked back at him, acting more surprised than she was. “Hi, Dad,” she said, and Bellamy nodded his way as well. “We’re just finishing up the movie.”
“Find your mom when you’re done, she wanted to talk with you.”
“Okay,” she said with a smile.
“Nice to see you, Bellamy.”
“You too, Mr. Griffin.”
They finished the movie without their usual commentary, even though Clarke’s dad was in the other room. Across the couch cushion that separated them, their hands were gently grasped. A knowing smile was permanently plastered across her face.
When the credits were over they stood up, and Clarke walked Bellamy the couple of steps to the door. They glanced around nervously, but nobody was watching so Clarke wrapped her arms around him and planted a quick kiss on his cheek. “Same time next month?”
Bellamy leaned in so they were cheek to cheek. His breath in her ear sent a pleasant chill down her spine. “I was hoping to see you again sooner,” he whispered. Grinning ear to ear, she whispered back.
“I think that could be arranged.”