Chapter Text
Who do you miss the most, Dream?
Tommy's words echoed in Dream's head as he stared at the lava flow in front of him. By now he knew how it sounded, each pop, each spark. The cell itself was hot but Dream shivered, he felt cold to his core.
Who do you miss the most?
Who did he miss most? Dream had given everything up to be here, all the power he had carefully built up around him for months, came crumbling down.
There had been a certain beauty setting the world on fire and watching the inferno from the center of the chaos.
A flare of anger rippled through him as his eyes fell on one of the books Tommy had given him to write, 'How to get girls' or something along those lines, Dream hadn't been in the mood to point out he was probably one of the worst people to ask. Dream knew he stood at a crossroads in this cell, he had seen it in the darkness where the lava was his only light source, the clock his only company. Continue his charade of being the villain or admit his plan all along, would they even believe him? Or would they just think him manipulating again? Dream knew which one Tommy would believe and promote.
Perhaps he had gone too far, he had internally chuckled, albeit angrily, as Tommy mimicked him from weeks ago. Telling him to drop his stuff in a hole and that he was Dream's only friend. Perhaps he had gone a little too far in his manipulation, but had Tommy not partly deserved it? Had Tommy not been the root of all the conflict on his server, ripping his family apart? Every story needs a villain.
The warms of the lava couldn't warm the cold flush that covered his body in a cold sweat. Dream would always be the villain in this story, he had been since the start. The one with the most power is always seen as a tyrant by those who feel overwhelmed. Was that not how empires and civilizations' fell. The world holds multiple examples of kingdoms that thought they were eternal all to fall crumbling down.
Who do you miss most, Dream? I swear to god if you say gogy?
George. A soft smile stretched Dreams cracked lips. George who was drawn to the colour blue as a moth was drawn to a flame. Who made Dream's lungs hurt with laughter when he complained about not seeing colours. Dream remembered the first time he and Sapnap saw the world through George's eyes, a potion that the three had spent days creating. Dream remembered how dull the world looked as if all colour had been sucked out of it. Then he had looked at George's eyes and seen a glimmering kaleidoscope of colour reflected in them, he heard yellow laughter and jade green anxiousness in George's voice. It was that day Dream realized that George may not see in colour but heard in it. Every action George took was driven by sound and the colours he heard and felt rather than saw.
Dream closed his eyes, George's laughter tumbling through his memory. Stupid games and chases that the two used to do so often and the leather cap George would always dye a different colour.
Dream missed George. George was his rock, his calm, quiet place. Someone who would never judge Dream too harshly for his actions, someone who would listen before acting. That was what was so special about George, his ability to ground Dream when the whole world around them crumbled under the enteral pressure of change. George would always be there, his stupidly large goggles covering his pale face and a witty smile that Dream loved.
"Just say you hate me.'"
He missed George. He missed bluebell silence that wrapped him in a warm comforting embrace. He missed purple mischief that bound their souls together with a shimmering strand of trust. A bond that he had cut, a bond that now severed sent tumbling rivers of ice into his blood.
Who do you miss most, Dream?
Flickering flames, cackling laughter and uncontrollably chaos. Sapnap. Sapnap's fierce burning loyalty that burned through his eyes into the raven's every move. Dream missed his longest friend's smile, his constant warmth.
Where George was like water, calm, deep, quietly powerful and a playful trickster. Sapnap was fire. Sapnap burnt brightly, a light in the darkness that Dream had used as his light for years, Sapnap gave Dream light and in return Dream gave Sapnap fuel to burn, to burn so brightly that he was never encased in the shadows that clung to Dream.
A memory surfaced in Dream's mind. Dark brown eyes lit by the fire clenched in his hand, giddy joy and excitement rolled off of him in palpable waves. Sapnap had trembled in anticipation as the two of them had stood in front of Tubbo's burnt house declaring war for the first time in L'manberg. Dream remembered feeling on top of the world. Sapnap's fierce loyalty warmed him, urging him on. Had he known then, where the path would lead?
"Step away from them, Dream.'"
He missed Sapnap. He missed the honey-scented flames that pushed him to his limit, pushed him to be better. Sapnap was the brighter, forever warmth that collided with Dream's shadows lighting up the world around them. He missed the lilac smugness that rolled of his friend when he beat Dream in tournaments or finally won in a manhunt. He missed the silent understanding between the two of them that came with years of friendship, before George it had just been them. An unstoppable duo that raced after the sun and laughed deep into the night. A duo that had crumbled before his eyes, he had seen the shock and confusion that coloured those brown eyes as he had dethroned George. Had watched that fiery flame of loyalty receded from around him, only to encase George more fiercely. Leaving Dream to be swallowed by his shadows.
Who do you miss most, Dream?
Blonde hair, blue eyes, quiet eyes. Punz. Through all of this, Punz had been by Dream's side, even when George and Sapnap had left him. Dream remembered thumping music filling his ears. Dancing to the battleship grey beat that Punz played, watching as his blue-eyed friend chuckled when he realized what Dream was doing, he allowed Dream's forest green humor to seep into the room, allowing Punz to hear and feel his smile beneath his mask. The buzzing of bees now hummed in his mind, Punz's face lit by torchlight, eyes eagerly reflecting the flames as he stared around him at the bees that fluttered around him. Bumkin nudging the mercenaries hand gently, snorting in a way that made Dream think that Punz could understand the horse.
'"I'm sorry, Dream. But you should have paid me more."
Had it all been for money? Dream had thought, or at least hoped that Punz had felt the connection between them.
Dream missed Punz. The gentle presence that joined Dream's shadows, who understood the whispers of darkness and wasn't afraid to join Dream in the ghostly abyss. Punz wasn't the light that sent the shadows scattering like Sapnap, nor was he the warm embrace of George. No, Punz was the settling presence in the darkness, the feeling of not being alone when he had lost all else.
But that changed the second Punz stepped out of that portal, the way sky blue eyes widened fractionally at the blade that Dream held towards Tubbo. And for the first time, Dream thought he saw fear in Punz's expression. The hands that had guided Dream into the prison had not been the gentle, comforting ones that Dream had felt before when Punz had faked his betrayal. These were the hands of someone who now had truly left Dream alone in the suffocating blackness.
Who do you miss most, Dream?
Soft pink hair, a maroon clock and a crown that glinted in the sunset. Techno who everyone thought Dream didn't truly see as a friend. Techno, the person who understood Dream as no one else could. Techno who had a quiet understanding of who Dream really was, who had seen through his facade the second he had stepped into Pogtopia. Techno sat with Dream on moonless nights. Techno was not the weapon that Tommy saw him as, no, Techno and Dream were two sides of the same coin.
Deep laughter that warmed Dream's very bones. Blood red eyes that held purple mischief to match even George's. Hidden behind the pig mask and armor; Techno and Dream were all too similar. Techno knew what it was like to be the villain in the story. Knew what it was like to be hunted. To be a forgotten god.
"We are not friends. We have a mutual goal."
Dream had not made eye contact with Phil in the sewers when Techno said those words. Had ignored the ocean blue surprise that filled Phil's face as he caught Dream's tight expression, he had shied away from Phil's consoling hand.
Dream missed Techno. He missed the quiet understanding between them, the maroon comradery that he felt in Techno's presence. He and Techno were light and dark. Techno whose hands would be covered with dirt, who would come home smelling of damp soil and potatoes, a plan tumbling off of his lips. His strong words disguising the scars that littered his body and mind. Who tamed Dream's reckless, impulsiveness, who would always be a few steps behind Dream to cover his back when Dream jumped headlong into death-defying stunts and fights. Techno's deep chuckle and strong presence at Dream's back as they took on the world together.
A presence that was now gone, leaving Dream to face the world alone. No one to tame or challenge his recklessness. No one to sit beside Dream in the quiet nights, no one to remind him that being the villain is not the only trait of a person.
'If someone knows they are the villain they are more dangerous than any madman.'
Dream remembered asking why.
'Because they are willing to walk into hell just to see those he cares about safe. Even when those he is protecting hate him. Those who know they are the villain are really the real villain'
'That is not who a villain should be'
'Oh Dream, we both know that being the Villain is a choice. A choice to bear the burden of chaos. So they do not feel the weight of the world on their shoulders.'
Techno. The one person who saw through Dream's facade. The only person who understood why Dream was becoming the Villain. The person who understood why he was doing it and never tried to talk him out of it like George and Sapnap would. The person who was now thousands of blocks away with Phil, laughing next to a fire, petting a dog or a hundred. The anarchist pig who behind it all had a soft heart, who allowed Tommy to stay with him, armed him and had almost broken when Tommy, his youngest brother, had chosen Tubbo over him. Dream heard the pain in Techno's voice as the blood god ran from the ruins of the community house. Recognized the ice blue betrayal that coat his words and actions as Dream came after him, as the same ice blue that had filled his veins since Sapnap and George had left. Techno who even now probably was playing off not caring about Ranboo and wouldn't admit, even though that the half-enderman boy had wormed his way into his protective heart.
Who do you miss most, Dream?
Dream let a single tear fall down his left cheek.
He missed them all and more. He missed the people who made him who he was. The people that were in his family. One big happy family, everyone but him.
A cool hand-tipped Dream's head upwards to meet a pair of eyes, he hadn't realized his mask was missing. The eyes surveyed him neutrally.
Who Dream?