Work Text:
The Archimedes was built for leisure but Khun had nothing but a headache from the moment he arrived. First, he had a fight with the crocodile. He could still feel his chin aching. Then, Wangnan came to talk and Khun blurted out something about him so easily that made him feel so vulnerable. That was too much for him. For a moment he went to his own room to go and have time for himself. But sitting there thinking about what he had just said to Wangnan was getting hard. So he decided to go for a walk.
He knew that going around was dangerous. He needed to be careful not to raise too much attention. After all, to the world Khun Aguero Agnis was dead. It was a reckless move on his part but he already left his room and for the moment being with the Sweet & Sour team with the addition of the croc was a no. He needed to clear his mind and mentally prepare himself for the start of the Workshop Battle, so while walking he opted to avoid the more packed zones. It was good that he took a cloak and tied his hair so that he could conceal his hair. It wasn't the perfect disguise but for the moment it will help. He hadn't actually thought about going out, so he had not dyed it.
It was a relief that almost all people went to the second floor to have fun so for the moment the first floor hadn't a lot of people. While walking around he found that between floors there were dark areas where he could have a little peace. Putting his back on the nearest wall he sighed and the inevitable thoughts emerged.
The stupid question of the crocodile of what he wanted to do could be easily answered, but Khun knew that reply would have a lot of weight in his decision and affect not only him but Bam's and the other's lives.
He was angry with himself because as much as he hated to accept that Rak was right, he was overthinking. Of course the moment he saw Bam he wanted to go after him and ask him a lot of things. But at the same time he had been scared that he had imagined the whole moment.
Still, what pissed him the most was hearing that he lost things because of overthinking. That hurt and made him remember the years when he had been mourning Bam's death and had dedicated himself to running endless scenarios of what he could have done differently. The decision to not go with the others weighed on him. He chose to go with Rachel and the team he made but it wasn’t easy. He hadn’t been vocal about it but being with the others on the floor of tests has been one of his happiest moments.
On top of that, talking about this made him remember his childhood where having things that you liked and cared about was dangerous. A wrong move and you would have given away your weakness.
As a child Khun liked gemstones. The first one he saw was a yellow topaz. He was drawn to the color and the way that something so small could be so beautiful and strong. So he made a hobby of collecting them and founding a book about them made his interest grow.
Every time he found one he would go and put it in his room so that later he could take them out and admire them while also adding them to his collection. That day he found one he didn't have in his collection—a citrine. He was looking happily at it while he was writing on his notes when he was summoned. Being urgent, he didn't have the time to put away his box and notes and left in a hurry.
When he returned he couldn't find his things. He started searching all over the manor. Without luck he gave up and returned to his room. While walking back he stepped on some kind of paper. Feeling a knot on his throat. He gathered the pieces of paper. He recognized his handwriting on them. Breathing heavily, he started to collect what used to be his notes.
Then, by the end of the hall he saw his box tossed. Running to it, he picked it up. It was empty. With his heart aching he took a step back and stepped on some kind of glass. When he lifted his foot, he found fragments of different colors. With trembling hands he tried to collect them. He could feel his vision blurring. He stopped when he heard footsteps. He raised his head and was met with his mother's eyes. She wasn't alone. His cousin was by her side and by the look she gave him, he deduced she was the culprit.
“Aguero,” his mother called. “You need to be more careful with your things”
At that moment Khun learned his lesson. If he wanted to keep something then no one should see it. He vowed that not even he would touch them, so that nothing bad would happen to them. It was a lesson that helped him survive the rest of his years in the Khun manor.
Meeting Bam felt the same as finding that yellow topaz. He was interested and wanted to look at it more closely. The closer they became the more he was drawn to him and the more he cared for the other.
Khun knew too well that having something important was dangerous. He couldn't go around hiding them and even he was reluctant to stay near. Because he knew that everything he cared about would be taken away and that's exactly what happened. He lost Bam.
Having been moping for a long time, Khun decided it was time to go back before he encountered more people and got himself more attention than necessary. It was kind of getting late.
He got up. Checking his surroundings and seeing no one. He started walking.
Khun decided to take the long way. It would help him clear his mind of the memory.
His footsteps echoed in the hallway. He had walked a few steps when he saw a dark figure in the distance, leaning on a wall. Hoping it was a random person he kept walking. Getting closer he started to pick out the person's features. Long dark brown hair held in a ponytail, black clothes...
Khun had to stop himself. He could feel his heart almost leaping off his chest, because there in front of him was the man he had been thinking of —Jue Viole Grace—his beloved friend Bam.
Since he had known Bam was alive his heart ached every time he saw him but mostly he felt regret. He didn't like to see Bam like that because as Wangnan said he preferred to carry the burdens of others, not the other way. Bam shouldn't do it. Seeing Bam trying to carry everything by himself was enough to make him feel useless. He couldn't protect Bam and now he could only watch him from a distance. It pained him to have Bam near yet know that as near as he was, he could not have been farther away.
He could go and take Bam's hand and run with him. They would run away from all this mess. He would hide Bam so that none ever could take him away from him. All he wanted was to see those golden eyes shy again and Bam's smile. But it was a foolish dream, no matter where he hid Bam inside the Tower they will always be found. All he could do was to watch him from a distance.
Sighing, Khun decided to walk away. However when he was going to turn around and return to where he came from, the other noticed him.
His whole body froze. Every part of him felt heavier. He could hear his inner voice, telling him to go away. Khun could only divert his gaze to the floor.
It would be suspicious to go backwards. He had to pass near the other. Trying to compose himself he took a breath.
Feeling his heartbeats almost going out of his chest. He tried to move his trembling feet. Counting inside his head, he made the first move. Concealing his face, he lifted it and focused his gaze on the end of the hall. He could hear his footsteps and breathing. He tried to tell himself he had to act normal. Every step was like walking on a slippery surface. The closer he approached the other, the trembling increased. He could feel his palms sweating.
The moment he neared the other he thought time had stopped. His whole body shivered. He could feel a knot on his throat. He made a mistake and looked up. He found those golden eyes looking at him. He could only stare.
Since he knew the other was alive. He had not been so near the other's face. All he had done was look at him at the distance.
Being near helped him catch the small differences in Viole's eyes from those of Bam's at the Floor of Tests. They weren't as bright as he remembered and a little bit dull. He could see the other had been through a lot. His heart ached. Bam shouldn't have that look.
Khun could feel his hand wanting to reach Bam, to make sure this wasn't a dream and to take him away so that he could erase that look in the other and so that the others stopped using his Bam. He clenched his hand hard. Until he felt his nails scratching his palms to stop himself.
Frustrated with himself and not waiting to make more mistakes, he clenched his jaw, before he blurted out something.
However, those feelings were replaced with curiosity when a strange light appeared in the other's eyes. He could feel his eyes widening. He held his breath while golden eyes were looking at him with recognition. He couldn't take his gaze away from the other. Bam's eyes had always been so expressive and being in front of Viole, he could see glimpses of relief, joy and longing. That later transformed into distress and nervousness before becoming dull again. He could also see the other’s posture becoming rigid and saw the other taking a step back. Seeing these actions made him heartbroken. The other had completely closed his soul from him.
The atmosphere became tense and before he could understand if what he saw was real, a voice was heard.
“Viole where had you been, we had been searching for you”.
Turning around he noticed the rabbit girl of the other day and he could hear more voices coming to the hall. It was time to go. Rearranging his cloak, he gave the other a last gaze and he walked away. The drumming of his heartbeat didn't stop until he was in the security of his room. Taking off the cloak he found himself breathing again.
Wind blowing his hair, he was at the balcony looking at the dark sky while thinking of what had happened that afternoon. He had seen him again. They had been so close but at the same time so far. Clenching his hands, he could only think of how careless he had been but life functions in a strange way. He hadn't thought that by going out he would run into him.
He was also thinking about the conversation he had with Rak minutes ago, that he had been happy that all of three could go together.
He knew he had hesitated and doubted himself, but remembering the look on Viole's eyes, made him realize that it wasn't all completely lost. There was still the Bam he had met that day in there and Viole had recognized him, so he was going to get Bam away from FUG. There's no denying that the idea made him anxious. He wanted to be together with Bam but inside of him was a little doubt of what would happen if he failed. He wouldn't be able to retrieve him. He didn’t want to feel like that day again, when he had lost that citrine...
Hearing the voices of Sweet & Sour and remembering the way Rak had been expressing his desire of getting Bam, he knew that everything would be alright. He wasn't alone in this and he was after all Khun. Looking at the sky he remembered that promise he had made to Bam. He would do anything to take Bam to the top even if it was dirty. But first he had to win the Workshop Battle...
On the other side, there was a figure looking at the night. He could still remember the encounter of that afternoon.
The moment he saw the person in the cloak he felt a certain familiarity and felt a little curious when the person stopped. When he met his eyes, he caught that colour he hadn't seen for a long time and had thought he had lost. Sapphire eyes had met his gaze. He would be lying to say that the encounter had not made him happy and anxious. He wanted to run with Mr. Khun but at the same time he wanted him to run away from him. He shouldn't be there and when Xia Xia had called him he was relieved. He saw the other walking away as he should.
Putting his face on the cold balcony he vowed to be stronger so that one day he could go with the others.
Having met Khun changed him. It was the first time someone apart from Rachel had displayed interest in him, offered to climb the tower together and had been concerned for his well being.
Meeting the others had shown him how it feels to be around people. He had cherished those moments. They were his precious friends so he had to keep himself grounded and remember the dangers of getting too close to them.
Today he had almost broken the promise but inside him he hoped that one day he would be able to return to the others. Khun and the others have shown him the warmth of having someone near and the joy of sharing moments together. Despite the circumstances of their meeting, he could remember the moments fondly.
He only hoped it wouldn’t be too late. Being like this made him remember when he had been living in that dark freezing cave where there was nothingness. Only him and his breathing. He has seen the world full of colors and warmth. It was something he craved to see again. Something he had thought was lost. But today he had a glimpse of that color. Viole wanted more. He desperately hated being alone. But if it was for his friends safety he would have to endure for longer...
Despite being apart, the sky remained witness to their promise.