Chapter Text
When Zhongli offered him a job for the millionth time and he finally accepted, Venti never thought that he would have to film his disastrous gourmet experiments so people on the internet can laugh at him. It’s nice, though. His previous job had been as a sous chef in a hole on the wall, and not only were the working hours terrible and he only made slightly above minimum wage, but he had also spent most of his time peeling potatoes and chopping vegetables tucked away in the corner of a busy kitchen between ovens that made him sweat way too much. If he had known that being an International Culinary Center graduate would land him nowhere, he would have saved the tuition money, thank you very much.
Venti pushes the door of the building where the Wanmin headquarters are located with his hip and takes the elevator to the fifth floor. He’s been off for two (very well deserved) weeks, and he won’t admit he’s missed the grumpy squeaky-clean tile floors and the elevator that makes a weird noise when you push any of the buttons.
“Hello, daddy long dick just landed in Liyue!” Venti barges into the kitchen, sunglasses perched on the tip of his nose, ice americano in hand. Xiangling immediately approaches him and throws herself into his arms with a little squeak, blue hair bouncing around and the bell she’s tied to her apron chiming with her movements.
“Welcome back, Venti! Did you do anything interesting?” she asks, arms slung over Venti’s shoulders and cheek pressed to his. Xiangling had joined six months ago when the project had started, just like Venti, and even though she was into a… different type of cuisine than he was, they had clicked immediately.
Thinking back, hiring them both probably wasn’t the best idea if the company wanted to keep a professional and serious image, but their audience seemed to eat up any video they made together, so it’s not like workplace environment mattered much when the views (and the money) started to roll in. Venti cannot help but feel endeared that she’s so excited to see him and hugs her back with the arm that’s not holding his morning coffee.
“Yeah, went back to Mondstadt to visit friends, it was nice. How about you?” She doesn’t need to tell him what shenanigans she’s been up to, really, because Childe will most likely complain about the weird smells and fumes and sounds that have been coming from her worktable as soon as he gets there.
“Made some caramelized lizard tails and asked Childe to try them as a joke…” she leans forward and whispers in his ear, “and he did.”
Venti untangles himself from the other cook and holds both of her hands in his, looking at her in the eyes with a pleading face. “Please, tell me you got it on camera.”
“Of course,” she replies with solemness, and swings their linked hands a bit. “I think it’ll be up this week”.
“You’re a cruel woman, Xiangling,” comes a voice from the door. They both turn and Childe is greeted by two matching shit-eating grins. “Not only I have to deal with two gremlins and an emo kid in my kitchen, but people also make fun of me on the internet for it. Not fair.”
“It’s not your kitchen,” Xiangling retorts and starts walking backwards without showing her back to Childe. Smart move, never take your eyes off your enemies.
“You are aware that I’m technically your boss, right?” Childe answers, hands crossed in front of his chest and an eyebrow raised in question.
“Technically,” Xiangling air quotes with her fingers, doing a little shimmy with her shoulders that any sane person in the world would find exasperating.
“What are you going to do, technically fire us?” it’s Venti’s turn to chime in and Childe doesn’t honor him with a response. Instead, he chooses to ignore them, close his eyes, and take a deep breath before his instincts give in and he dropkicks them both. He unceremoniously tosses his jacket and backpack on his worktable and disappears behind the door that leads to the walk-in fridge and the storage room, probably to have a good scream.
Venti walks to the end of the room and dumps all his stuff on his workstation. His spot is the one closest to the table they use to film, and he would argue that it’s the best one. Not only because he’s aware of everything that everybody is filming and can chime in whenever he feels like it, but also because the view from his station is the best one.
The right side of the room is completely covered in windows, and Venti’s spot is the only one who directly faces the ocean without any tall buildings covering the view. Sometimes he sits and watches the sunset when everybody else has left for the day and it’s just him in the kitchen. It’s peaceful, even if the city is bustling under him and he can hear the noise of cars and people roaming about their day.
Opposite to the windows, the left side of the room has what seem to be way too many ovens and stoves for only four chefs. The workstations are sitting in the middle, four to actually work and one to film, and someone who has watched any of their videos could easily tell which one belongs to whom just by how clean or messy they are.
Just when Venti is fishing a notebook from his backpack to start recipe planning for the week, he hears someone come into the kitchen. He turns to say hi, but the greeting dies on his lips when his eyes land on Xiao. He’s wearing a half-opened black shirt and his hair, normally covering half his face, is tied up in a messy ponytail.
Xiao is the latest addition to the team, and in the beginning, Venti had wondered why he was the one the higher-ups had picked. He’s a wonderful pastry chef, no doubt, but a big part of the job in the Test Kitchen entails being in front of a camera and producing content that people want to watch, and for the first weeks that Xiao was on the job he clearly had a miserable time talking to the lens. However, at due time, Venti understood – Xiao was picked because he’s the calm and collected personality that their team was lacking.
Xiangling and Venti proud themselves on many things but being levelheaded and good at problem-solving isn’t one of them. And even if Childe wants to call himself the only braincell of the team, he easily crumbles down under pressure. When it comes to having innovative ideas to use gadgets, finding a solution after the fiftieth failed recipe test, or keeping his cool when Xiangling accidentally set a kitchen towel on fire and the sprinklers went off, Xiao is the one to rely on.
And god, he’s pretty. Venti is not too sure if it’s the sharp features, the perennial judging amber eyes or the jade tattoo covering his right arm, but there’s something about Xiao’s presence that draws him in.
Venti coughs a little to cover up the fact that he’s not immune to Xiao’s presence even if they’ve been seeing each other five days a week for months. And because he doesn’t trust his voice, he waves at Xiao with a big smile and receives a head nod in return.
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“Hello everyone, I’m Xiao from the Wanmin Test Kitchen and today we’re making gourmet tater tots.” Venti has been scribbling recipes ideas for the past half an hour, but takes his earbuds off and raises his eyes to look at the other cook when he starts filming. He cannot help but chuckle, Xiao is still incredibly awkward in front of a camera even after months of working there and it’s honestly endearing.
Xiao is going over pommes paillasson and the problem with oxidizing potatoes looking like old porridge and how he has figured out that he could use an apple corer to get the tater tots to the perfect shape when Venti briefly makes eye contact with Xinyan, the camera operator, who gives him a wink and gestures for him to go over to Xiao’s table. He rises an eyebrow at her, but only receives a small shoulder shrug before she focuses again.
Because he really has nothing better to do with his time (and because he enjoys being a nuisance), Venti skips to Xiao’s worktable and looks over his shoulder to check what he’s doing. “Hey Xiao, you need help?”
Xiao almost jumps and turns around quickly, hitting Venti with a wooden spoon he wasn’t holding a moment ago. “You scared the shit out of me.” Venti almost feels bad for startling the other cook, but Xiao is scowling at him, so he decides to give him a shit-eating grin and shrug his shoulders. “You could help me peel potatoes; it’s going to take forever.”
And alas, there’s a mountain of potatoes waiting for them on the table. Venti mutters a quiet “Sure” and places himself next to Xiao, resting his hands on the worktable and looking around. Xiao has both the ingredients and the handwritten recipe on his table, and Venti has to admire the dedication. Usually, he just wings it.
There’s a brief pause while Xiao searches for some utensils they can use, and not being someone acquainted with comfortable silence, Venti starts talking about whatever comes to his mind first. “You know? I’ve been reading the comments on your videos lately. You need to start giving people what they want.”
“Hm.” Xiao is rummaging to the drawers searching for a second potato peeler and clearly not paying attention, but he tries to humor Venti even if it’s just for the camera. “And what do they want?”
“You.” Venti raises his eyes and makes finger guns at Xiao, but the other just shakes his head, sighs, and keeps on rummaging. It takes Venti a second too long to take his eyes off Xiao’s side profile because fuck he shouldn't be allowed to be that gorgeous, and he prays to all gods that the camera hasn’t picked it up or people will point it out (again).
“I don’t know what kind of answer I expected from you,” Xiao says after a few seconds, taking a knife and closing the drawer with his hip. He hands Venti the potato peeler and takes the knife for himself, starting to work with meticulous care.
“It’s not my fault that you have a simp following.” Venti complains, and Xiao looks like he regrets every single life decision that has led him to that moment. “I have an idea!” Venti ignores the internal turmoil the other man is going through and lifts his eyes from his potato, pointing his peeler to the camera with way too much enthusiasm. “If you guys get this video to five million views, I will get Xiao to get his shirt off on camera.”
There’s a brief silence and Venti can hear Xiangling snickering from the other side of the room. Xiao just looks more and more mortified by the second. “I’m not doing that,” he mutters.
“Oh, you will. I can be very persuasive.” Venti winks to the camera and goes back to his potatoes. “I don’t know if you guys are aware, but Xiao goes to the gym every day... Sometimes when he knows he doesn’t have to be on camera he comes directly from it all sweaty and stuff. It’s kinda hot.” Venti is aware that he’s testing his luck there because Xiao does go to the gym and if Venti were to get punched in the face for overstepping boundaries it would certainly hurt. “I’m sure there are some rock-hard abs under his tsundere disguise.”
Xiao sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose like he can feel a headache forming just by being stood next to Venti. “I’m holding a knife, I would be more careful with my words if I were you.”
“Please, Xiao, you’re not going to hurt me while we’re filming, you’re smarter than that.”
“Bet.” Xiao picks up the wooden spoon and bonks Venti in the head again with force enough that he has to bring up a hand and soothe the place where he’s been hit.
“Bonk,” Venti pouts and furrows his eyebrows, and he can’t help to finish the phrase. “Go to horny jail”.
Xiao looks at him for a second, amber eyes widening and mouth opening and closing a few times with no sound coming out of it. Even though he tries to hide it, the cook huffs a small laugh and turns to the camera, pointing the knife at it like Venti had pointed his peeler just a few minutes before “I have a better idea,” he says directly to the lens. “Get this video to one view and I will deck Venti in the fucking face.”
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“When are you going to do something about him?” Childe points to Xiao with his chin and Venti rises his eyebrows. Their lunch break is almost over, and it’s just the two of them in the small kitchenette adjacent to the main kitchen. There’s not many people working on the Test Kitchen project, so they only have two tables with a few chairs each, two microwaves that reek of overheated spaghetti tupperwares and a small sofa that chefs (Venti) use to take naps when they come to work hungover. Through the glass that separates the main kitchen from the breakroom, they can see Xiao and Xiangling bustling around, and Venti has been having a really hard time trying not to stare.
Venti blows on the cup of tea he’s holding, eyes still fixed on Xiao, before replying. “What do you want me to do?”
“I don’t know, man…” Childe lays back on his chair, arms behind his head, eyes trailing back and forth from Venti to Xiao. “Ask him out. You look like you’re about to get on your knees every time he’s around.”
Venti sighs dreamily and takes his eyes off Xiao to direct them to Childe, who’s now looking at him with both of his eyebrows raised in question. “He’s so hot,” he whines, and Childe just snorts as a response. He takes a sip before he speaks again, “Don’t you think it would make the dynamic in the kitchen weird?”
“I don’t care,” Childe replies way too quickly and it’s Venti’s turn to rise his eyebrows. The other man just shrugs. “Anything as long as I don’t have to see you pine for another four months.”
“I’m not pining?”
“Yeah, of course you’re not,” Childe concedes, voice dripping with sarcasm, and Venti has to gather up all his patience not to smack him with the Hello Kitty mug he’s holding. “You give him heart eyes just because.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Venti knows what Childe is talking about, and he knows he’s being deliberately dense. But he’s a firm believer that feelings are not there if you decide not to think about them, so that’s exactly what he’s going to do. He doesn’t want to overcomplicate things.
Childe sighs in defeat and leans forward to rest his arms on the table. “Just give it a thought.”
“I will.”
“No, you won’t.”
Venti loudly slurps his tea just to spite Childe and takes a moment too long to reply. “No, I won’t.”