Archive of Our Own ^beta

The yellow rose lay on the table, untouched. Its petals were beginning to bloom, and tied to it was a note written in an elegant script.

Terrence stared at the rose. It was undoubtedly pretty, and its fragrance was intoxicating. He picked it up tentatively, and read the note that came with it.

“From your secret admirer,”

Huh. How cliché.

The sound of the door opening behind him caused him to turn around, and he saw Randy walking in the room, their usual smile in place and bright attire a stark contrast to the dull walls.

Before Terrence could hide the rose, Randy saw the anonymous gift and their eyebrows went up in shock.

“Oh, that’s really pretty! Where’d you get it? You planning on wooing someone? Who’s the lucky person?” they asked in quick succession before Terrence could even answer. The man sighed and put down the rose.

“Someone gave it to me, no name signed on it though,” he explained. If anything, his answer made his friend look even more shocked.

“A secret admirer! Terry you lucky duck! But of course,” Randy looped his arm around Terrence’s neck, knocking his black hat askew before continuing “who could resist a handsome face like yours huh?”. They flashed another bright grin at their blushing friend, who was trying to adjust his hat back.

Really, if he could be honest, Terrence wasn’t interested in romance at the moment. What with the heists and trying to secure a stable position in the clan, his time was fully occupied, and he wanted to focus on impressing Wilford. He might be a rookie, but Terrence wanted to show his commitment to the clan, and pursuing a romantic relationship with someone will just be a distraction.

He did not voice his thoughts to Randy, who looked so happy that their friend had a secret admirer. Instead, Terrence smiled and nodded at Randy’s rambling about the rose, and later on laughed along with them about their day’s antics.

Really, romantic relationship might be out of the table for the moment, but Terrence was glad that he was able to be friends with such a fun person like Randy. That, is a relationship that he wished will grow in the future.

________________________________________________________________

Sweat trickled down Terrence’s forehead, his heart was thumping wildly, every nerve in his body was alive. His arm and shoulder were bleeding from gunshots, but in his alarmed state and his body filled with adrenaline, he barely noticed it.

Most of the other Toppats in the raid had made it out safely, and the few still behind were shooting at the guards that had poured out when the alarm started ringing. Terrence looked around wildly, trying to find Randy in the chaos around him. Last he saw, they were on their way out, but had circled back when they saw some members who were down.

‘They should be out now,’ he thought. But Terrence couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. Just when he thought about leaving, sure that his friend was safe, he heard a scream from an all-too familiar voice.

“TERRENCE!” That one shout was enough to send him running to the direction of the source. Terrence saw Randy on the ground, their leg bleeding, their gun out of their reach. And behind them, a couple of guards closing in on them.

Terrence wasted no time. He dashed to Randy’s side, lifted them up and ran to the exit, all the while shooting blindly behind him in the hopes of slowing down their pursuers.

The next moments passed by in a blur. They made their way out of the vault, into the Toppat’s escape pod. Terrence was shouting for medic to stop Randy’s bleeding. His friend’s face was ashen, and he barely heard any word uttered by them.

It was only when they finally reached the airship, that Terrence was aware of his surroundings. His wounds were aflame, and he groaned in pain, but he refused any help until he made sure that Randy reached the medical room to get patched up.

“I’m fine Terry,” Randy smiled weakly at him, usually bright eyes dimmed from the wound and the anaesthetic. Their eyes drooped, and they fell into unconsciousness. Terrence sighed in relief once he realized that the other Toppat was going to be alright, and the doctor in charge lead him to another room to get patched up.

________________________________________________________________

“Another rose?” Randy asked, peering from behind him. Terrence jumped slightly, and his face turned red.

“Yeah, same person I think,”

The rose this time was pink, the exact same shade as Randy’s hat. Just like last time, there was no telling who send it, save for a note tied to it signed, once again, from his ‘secret admirer’.

As he put the rose aside on his dresser, Terrence winced slightly at the stiffness from his shoulder and arm. His wounds had healed, but they still irritated him. He was luckier than Randy though, as the other person still had their injured leg in a cast.

After he was patched up, Terrence visited Randy at the medical room as often as he could. Once the adrenaline was gone, the reality that both he and Randy could have been goners had he not reacted fast enough haunted him day and night. It was not the first time that they had been put in a dangerous position, nor would it be the last with the life that they had chosen, but this was the first time that Terrence was truly confronted with the reality that he could lose someone he cared about a lot.

Wilford had pulled him aside, and praised him for his bold move to save a member of the Toppat clan. “That's what I like to see in a Toppat, lad,” he’d said to a stunned Terrence. “Willing to save their members like they would their own lives.”

Terrence shared this moment with Randy during one of his visits. They beamed widely at him when they heard Terrence recounted his conversation with Wilford.

“Wilford’s right, man. What you did back there for me was rad as hell! I would’ve been a goner if it weren’t for you,” they said. Terrence smiled widely at them; his spirit soared at hearing the praise.

“You would’ve done the same for me, Randy,” he reminded them. After knowing his friend for more than a year, Terrence had no doubt the other Toppat would’ve selflessly jumped into the line of fire to save him. It was one of the many things that Terrence admired about Randy.

“Yeah, but I wouldn’t have been able to do it as awesome as you! I mean seriously, you were all like,” Randy lifted their hand and did a gun impression. “pow! Blam! And you did it all while carrying me and didn’t even turn around! Seriously dude, you should’ve seen yourself, you were like a hero in an action movie, and I was the damsel in distress,” with that, Randy did a swooning impression, causing Terrence to laugh aloud at his friend’s antic.

Terrence leaned forward and pushed Randy down to the bed, not wanting them to overexert themself. As he was still chuckling, Terrence did not miss the look of genuine adoration on Randy’s face, and felt his heart leap.

________________________________________________________________

Terrence stood among his fellow Toppat members, those who went through training with him, the ones who he went to orientation with, the faces he saw the first time he stepped foot into the clan.

And now here they were, standing side by side, their faces illuminated with their excitement, their pride at having survived all the tests the best criminal clan in the world had to offer. Next to him, Terrence could feel Randy bouncing slightly on their feet, their brilliant grin etched across their face. Randy turned to look at Terrence, and he smiled back at them, albeit slightly more nervous. Out of all the faces surrounding him this moment, none of them made him as happy as Randy did. Knowing that his friend was beside him, joining in this new milestone in life, made all of the efforts and the challenges before them worth it.

Today, the new recruits shed their old position as newbies, and don their new ranking as official Toppat members.

Heart beating fast, Terrence stepped forward along with the others. Wilford stood in front of them, his usual stern expression replaced with pride and even a slight warmth to his features. As the proud Toppat leader recite the words to congratulate the new members and officially declaring them a part of the clan, Terrence felt Randy moving his hand towards his.

Without thinking, he immediately grabbed Randy’s hand and held on tight. Randy let out a small noise of shock, but by then Wilford had finished his speech. It was time for them to recite their vows aloud, promising their loyalty to the clan, and swore to give their life to defend and uphold the Toppat Clan until their last breath.

Terrence recited his vows, his voice joining in the other in a unison. The entire time, he did not let go of Randy’s hand. This was a new start to their lives, and he was glad he got to share it with someone as special as them.

________________________________________________________________

For some reason, Terrence knew he was going to see another gift from his secret admirer that night.

A pure white rose, akin to ones usually seen at weddings, lay on the usual spot, its pale petals a contrast to the dark wood and hauntingly beautiful accompanied with the dark night sky outside of his window.

Terrence sat down on his bed, holding the rose gingerly in his hand and turning it slowly, all the while his mind was working.

Three roses. Two of them delivered at such an important and life turning events.

At first, he had dismissed his ‘secret admirer’ as someone who had a simple crush on him, but now he was beginning to doubt that. It could not have been a coincidence that these roses were given to him at a time when something huge had happened to his life. There was a meaning here, but what was it?

Terrence heard Randy coming to his room. Still deep in thought, he did not look up when Randy sat beside him on his bed.

“Same person?”

Terrence nodded.

Randy looked at him, an unreadable expression on their face. “Don’t you wanna know who’s giving you all these? They must really like you a lot, if they’re still sending you roses,”

“Of course, I do,” Terrence replied. “But I don’t have time to play detective just to find some random person who’s too shy to actually meet me in person,”. He put the rose aside and smiled at Randy. “And besides, we’ve got bigger things to worry about right now, don’t we? We’re official Toppats now,”

Randy smiled back at him. Just like they did during the coronation, they put their hand on Terrence, and Terrence held it tight. No words were spoken, but it felt like some kind of quiet promise- deep down, Terrence knew he and Randy will get through this new chapter in life together.

________________________________________________________________

It had been months since the faithful day when Terrence and Randy had become official Toppats, and he was no closer in finding his ‘secret admirer’.

Randy kept asking him if he wanted to know who the anonymous rose sender was, and if they could help him investigate, but truth was Terrence had no intention of finding their identity.

When asked why, Terrence would always say that he wanted to focus on working for the Clan, and as their mission become more frequent and dangerous, and as their position in the clan rised higher with each heist, his excuse seemed reasonable, but what Randy didn’t know was that Terrence was lying to them and to himself.

Truth was, with each passing day he spends with them, with each joke and mission and talks and silent nights with nothing but each other’s peaceful company, Terrence fell more and more in love with Randy. He tried his hardest to deny this at first, burying his feelings deep down and making up excuses as to why he felt his face going warm whenever Randy laughed, why he always craved his best friend’s company, why he always rejected other people who pursued him, but he could not hide the truth.

Terrence Suave was in love with his best friend.

Never in his life had he ever felt so conflicted before this revelation. He never had felt such strong emotions to anyone before, and the knowledge that he harboured such intimate affection to Randy Radman- his closest friend, his biggest supporter, the one he shared all his pain, insecurity and joy with- terrified him more than anything.

Terrence did not want to do anything that might damage their friendship. He could not imagine life if Randy did not return his feelings, and worse- if they left him for this. So, Terrence kept this hidden from them.

What he wanted more than anything, was a sign, a sure way of knowing that Randy just might felt the same way about him. But so far, Terrence had no luck in gauging any kind of tell-tale sign from them, any hint that they see Terrence as more than just a friend. He wasn’t sure if he could hide his feelings any longer, but confessing his real feelings for Randy was something he wasn’t sure he could do.

Was this what his secret admirer felt about him? At the least, Terrence could sympathize with them, even if he could not return their affection. They were in the same boat after all.

________________________________________________________________

The music of in the grand hall filled the hall, the voices of merriments from the people in it accompanying the sweet tune. Toppats dressed in fancy clothes walked around the hall, laughing, talking and dancing with each other. The atmosphere was enchanting, the clothes and decorating dazzling, the food was superb and the drinks flowed freely all throughout the night.

Terrence sipped his drink, his eyes roaming the hall, taking in the scene of the fancy event. This was the first time he had ever been to a dance, surrounded by glamour. He had been nervous at first, but as the night continued and he had a few drinks, Terrence felt much more comfortable, and had even danced with a few people.

After the third dance, he decided to take a break and went to the long table lined with food and drinks. Terrence had went to the dance with Randy, but after his first dance, he did not see them anywhere.

‘Probably dancing with someone,’ he thought, and tried to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach. There was nothing wrong with that of course. He and Randy were just friends. They were free to dance with anyone they want, just like he was. There was nothing going on between them, and Terrence told himself that he needed to get over his disappointment.

Suddenly, he lost the excitement he felt for the dance. Just when he thought about going outside to get some fresh air, Terrence saw Randy walking out of the crowd, their bright pink suit standing out among the other Toppats, their dazzling smile on their face. Terrence felt relief washed over himself, and smiled back at them.

“Hey Terry! Having fun? I saw you dancing out there, you looked great,” Randy said, grinning at him. Terrence blushed at the compliment, and his heart started beating wildly. Keeping his voice steady was difficult.

“Y-yeah, this party is great. I’m just a bit tired,” he said.

Randy laughed at his answer. “Yeah, no kidding! A lot of people asked you to dance, you’re a real eye-catcher, my guy,” they winked at him, and Terrence’s face went even more red if that was possible. Too flustered to answer, he turned away and sipped his drink, pretending to watch a couple of people near them.

They stood there for a while, the air between them somewhat awkward. It was unusual for them not to talk when together, much less uncomfortable around the other’s presence. Randy shuffled their feet, their usual cheerful face nervous. Terrence still looked embarrassed; his eyes fixed on the other dancers.

“Do you want to dance with me?” Randy asked.

The question caught Terrence off guard. He finally turned to look at his friend. Randy was smiling nervously, something Terrence did not see often. Did he hear that right?

“You want to dance with me?”

“Yeah, I do,” Randy answered, then immediately said “If that’s ok with you I mean. It’s cool if you don’t want to I just-”

“I’d love to,” Terrence cut them off. Randy looked shocked. “No, really, I would love to dance with you,”.

They stared at him for a bit, then their face changed into their usual bright expression. Before Terrence realized it, Randy had taken his hand and steered them towards the dance floor.

Terrence could feel the people around them looking, and his palms felt sweaty. He had danced with someone before, but this was different. He was dancing with his best friend, the one he’d been steadily falling in love with for a long time. Suddenly he was all too aware of his surroundings and his senses. Randy’s touch on his shoulder and his waist sent a surge of spark, and the lights in the hall illuminated them, making them look more dazzling than usual. Terrence did not know he could feel something as intense as he did for them at this moment.

They moved and turned across the dancefloor, following the tune of the music, slow and romantic, but mesmerizing at the same time. Terrence and Randy locked eyes- everyone around them had disappeared, melted into the background. There was no one in the grand hall besides them at that moment, and they were both aware of the other’s touch, their heartbeats, their movements and neither were unable to tear away from each other.

The music reached a crescendo, and Randy spun Terrence around, and they dipped him. Terrence held on tight to their shoulder, his heart beating fast. When the tune changed again, Randy lifted him up and they were locked in an intimate hold, hands on each other’s shoulders. Randy was looking at him with tenderly. Without realizing it, Terrence slowly leaned forward, one of his hand rested on back of their neck, bringing them closer and closer.....

All too quick, the music was over, and a voice announced that it was the last song for the night. Terrence and Randy broke out of their trance, and they let go. All around them, they heard grumbling and complains, wishing that the dance would last longer, after all it was not often that the Clan had a special event.

The magic moment had ended. For some reason, Terrence found it hard to look at Randy. They didn’t say anything as well, and they both walked in silence towards their rooms.

Terrence felt a lump in his throat, and each moment that passed in silence killed him. They shared something special, and he could feel something between him and Randy, something real and tangible. Was it just him? Or did Randy felt it too? He wanted to ask, but something stopped him, and his heart weighed heavy in his chest.

They finally reached Randy’s room. For a second, Terrence thought they were going to say something, some acknowledgement of what transpired between them, but instead Randy simply turned and opened the door.

Before they went inside, Randy looked at Terrence, and he saw something flashed in their eyes. “Good night, Terry,” was all they said and they closed the door.

Terrence went to his own room in a daze. His mind spinning and disappointment welled in him. Once he reached his own quarter, he sat on his bed and put his head in his hands.

Confusion, frustration, and anger at himself swirled inside him. Before he knew it, exhaustion took over his body and he fell into an uneasy sleep, memories of the dance still clear in his head.

________________________________________________________________

The next morning, Terrence woke up with a headache, and another rose next to him.

As he held the rose in his hand, the purple petals soft and the sweet smell filling his room, something clicked in his mind.

________________________________________________________________

‘Meet me in the garden at 12,’

That was the only thing written on the note that Randy had found in their room. It wasn’t signed, the white, perfumed note giving no sign of its sender.

On any other time, they might have ignored the note. They love mystery, and any kind of excitement in their life they welcomed, but they were simply not interested in romance at the moment. It was hard to care about that kind of thing, when they had eyes for the one person who didn’t think of them as anything more than a friend.

But for some reason, something in their head nagged them to follow the note.
Ignoring their basic instinct, they decided to obey the voice and changed into something nicer. Randy waited in their room, and once they were sure that most people in the airship are asleep, they went out of their room and made the long walk towards the greenhouse in the airship.

The first thing Randy noticed was the rose on the ground. It was too deliberately placed to be an accident, and Randy knew it was for them.

Heart hammered, they picked it up off the ground and stared at it. A rose, with bright orange petals. Following it was a couple of petals strewn on the ground, clearly making a path for them to follow.

It was too much of a coincidence. The roses, the anonymous note, it was far too similar with what they had... could it be...?

Randy immediately followed the rose petals, going deeper inside the garden. The smell from the plants around them filled the air, and they felt dizzy from anticipation.

They found another rose on the ground, this time in a light peachy colour. They picked it up as well, and gazed at it in appreciation. Randy held it along with the orange rose, and continued the path.

Randy almost reached the centre of the greenhouse when they found the third rose, a pretty thing with unique colouring. They picked it up, and saw that it was mostly yellow, but its tips were red.

Randy was sure now who it was they will find in the garden.

Sure enough, as they finally reached the middle of the greenhouse, marked with a huge glass case filled with various plants and flowers, Terrence Suave was there, standing in the center, moonlight coming from the windows pooling around him, his hands behind his back.

A silence fell between them. Terrence looked at Randy with an unreadable expression, and Randy simply stood there, too stunned to speak.

Finally, Terrence broke the silence by showing Randy what he was holding- a bright red rose, by far the most beautiful one they had seen all night.

“How did you know it was me?” was the first thing Randy asked.

“After the party, I just knew it was you,” Terrence said. “Honestly, looking back it was kinda obvious, I just never really connected the dot,”

Randy reached out and gently took the red rose from Terrence’s hand. It was fully bloomed, and they couldn’t take their eyes of it, couldn’t process the meaning behind it. It was too good to be true.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

Randy looked at Terrence, who was staring at them curiously. Swallowing down their nerves, they finally spilled out the truth.

“Because I was scared,” was their answer. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before I met you, and-” unable to look at Terrence, Randy turned away. “- I just, didn’t want to ruin our friendship. You’re special to me Terry, and I just didn’t know how to say it, or even know if you feel the same way about me,”.

“But I do,” Terrence stepped forward, and held their hands in his own. He looked into their eyes, and Randy saw something earnest and gentle in them. Never had anyone looked at them with such adoration before.

“I do feel the same way, Randy, I just didn’t realize it at first and well,” he looked down embarrassedly “it’s just like you said, I didn’t know how to tell you, and I didn’t want to scare you away,”

Randy laughed slightly at the confession. So, Terry, smooth, level-headed Terry was in the same crisis they went through? It was too funny, knowing that they both felt the same way about each other but were too scared to confess, it was like something out of a romance movie.

They put the roses on the bench next to them, and embraced Terrence tightly. Terrence stood shocked for a moment before returning the embrace.

At the same time, they heard each other confess;

“I love you,”