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“Fuckin’ scavs.”
V spat in the sink, then lifted her head to take a look at her face in the mirror. A wide purple-blackish bruise was beginning to spread on her right eye socket. Just the kind of upgrade she needed. She shook her head: why the hell had she been so naïve?
“Shit, I’m hideous.”
“This wouldn’t have happened, if you suddenly didn’t decide to take a stroll with that sketchy virtu dealer.”
“Zip it, Johnny.”
Her digital mind denizen had just appeared a few inches away from her: his sneering face was the perfect complement beside V’s destroyed reflection. Luckily enough her teeth were still in place… no matter how Viktor was ever the gentlest ripperdoc with her, getting some new fake teeth implanted was no fun task. Furthermore, the products he used smelled like shit. V opened her mouth to check the situation, just in case, and Johnny mistook that silence for an invitation to keep on blabbering.
“Don’t tell me the thought it was a dodgy offer didn’t cross your mind! Not even for a second? Why would he need to sell his stuff right there – what was it? Oh yeah, ‘the most nova - specced, geek out, turnt up virtu you eeeever seen’, right?” he teased her, making his best impression of Stefan’s excited voice. “Anyone would have called bullshit, but you took the bait anyway. You deserve a trophy, V. Seriously, I’m impressed.”
“We got out of it, am I wrong?””
“Only ‘cause I stepped in just in time. Those scavs couldn’t wait to cut you in pieces and sell your shiny new chrome to some ripperdoc, trust me.”
V jerked a strand of hair behind her ear with a nervous move, as if it was enough to make Johnny disappear just like a troublesome thought. The dim lights of Judy’s bathroom somehow helped with masking the disastrous collection of bruises and wounds she got herself, but it would take a long time for them to completely heal. After opening the front door, her girlfriend had immediately ran to the freezer to retrieve a couple of ice packs only to place one on her eye, forcing her to sit still, very much in a Judy “you-came-to-me-looking-for-comfort-and-I-will-look-after-you” Alvarez way. On her part, V had tried to listen… but her intent could only last so long. Two minutes later she already was in front of the mirror, checking on her wounds and getting reprimanded by her second personality.
“You know Johnny, I might need to be reassured and not scolded, at a time like this.”
“You mess things up, I call you out on it. I believe this dynamic between us is going extremely well, right? And that bruise suits you. It almost matches your hair color.”
V raised her middle finger the exact moment Judy stepped in the bathroom.
“What are you doing?”
“Johnny. He deserves it” she explained, drying her hands. At least the ice had reduced the swelling. “He felt the irresistible urge to comment on the mission, as per usual.”
Judy’s laughter put her at ease. She was the only one to know about those arguments with Johnny, and the only person capable of accepting every aspect of her daily routine, ever the oddest ones.
“Weird he showed up now. Didn’t you say he usually lets you be every time we’re together?”
“Yeah, it’s usually so.” Of course there had been an exception: the first time she entered Judy’s house to discuss the Evelyn matter, only to find herself poking around in the living room, among posters and the robots she was assembling. That time he was sitting there, on Judy’s desk, observing V shift from an object to the other, a little smirk on her face. She has good taste, except for one thing: the way she looks at you. Don’t pretend you haven’t noticed. And she had blushed so hard she could only thank her lucky star the room was almost shrouded in darkness. “But apparently the temptation to retort about everything is just too strong for him. It’s like having a digital sarcastic and constantly pissed off mentor in my head.”
Judy chuckled again. “He had enough?”
“For now, I think so. We reached a compromise: he leaves when we’re together, and I let him interfere during my gigs. Quid pro quo” she added, suddenly recalling an expression Viktor – and Wakako – often repeated. It was Latin, or something like that. She ran a hand through her hair. The truth was she already got used to Johnny: the Relic shard was driving her crazy, but being able to share her thoughts with him and to hear his voice was somewhat… soothing. An attachment she was partially scared by, mainly due to the fact she had no idea what was going to happen once that situation was over, and getting really attached to a long dead rock star she had practically devoted her adolescence to wasn’t the best option, in her condition…
“Mh. I like this agreement. And I love hearing you speak Latin.”
Judy kissed her lips, taking V by surprise, and took advantage of the girl’s sudden confusion to hold her hand and drag her towards the couch. Of course she wanted to fulfill all of her tasks as a rescuer. The great thing about Judy was that, when she put her mind to something, it was impossible to make her desist. V had tried so many times, and they all winded up the same way: her landslide victory. Maybe it was because of her smile, or the fact she was head over heels in love with her, so unconditionally that even Johnny didn’t know how to tease her about it anymore.
“I thought there was no need for this, but maybe we better use it” she decided, pulling an ointment tube out of a blue transparent case she brought with her. She bent in front of V, evaluating her face to understand where she needed to be cured, biting her lips. She seemed so focused, so invested in her role as healer, V couldn’t help but burst out laughing unintentionally. She regretted it only a moment after, as she was punished with a creamy finger placed directly on her nose.
“I’m taking care of ya and that’s how you repay me?”
We’re even now, she thought, cleaning her face up. She couldn’t stop laughing.
“Sorry Jude, you’re adorable. I mean it.”
“You too, you know?” Judy’s gentle fingers were taking care of her bruises, rubbing the ointment on each one of them without skipping even a single wound. Closing her eyes and completely trusting her fingers was the most pleasant sensation. “Shiner or not.”
She stopped spreading the pomade, then stepped back a little to check on the result.
“Ok, I think we’re done. I’m glad I didn’t leave my first aid kit at Lizzie’s… each one of us has one there” she added, answering to V’s questioning look. “You know, in case someone decides to shake the nights up a little. It can be pretty useful, believe me.”
A vivid memory of Rita sticking band-aids on the hands of the girls made her smile again. She was about to stand up again, when Judy pushed her against the couch by pressing a finger on her chest.
“Be still, or I’ll have to do this the hard way, miss Sumire Valerie” she pretended to threaten her, putting the ointment back in her case. “At least for half an hour. And I’m being merciful here.”
“Or else?”
“I could start by tying you up.” She loved that naughty smile. “But I have the impression you might enjoy it a little too much.”
She winked and left her on the couch, head relaxed against the back of it and legs spread apart, in a messy angle. Back at the orphanage she used to get scolded for that posture: young ladies need to behave in a dignified manner, they used to repeat all the time. No weird faces, sit up straight, don’t eat with your hands. Outdated vestiges of a world that no longer existed, and anyway how was a girl who fought to survive everyday going to use those lessons?
Thinking about the St. Jude orphanage reminded her of the scavs. The confusion she felt as soon as she opened her eyes. Darkness, cold, a sharp pain to the head, her arms and legs completely sore. She had found herself naked, lying on the floor of a room she already knew far to well because she had already been there with Jackie, only this time her best friend wasn’t there to shield her, and not even Yoshimi, her sister: she was forced to make her way, alone, only with her gun and the strength of despair… but V wasn’t a kid anymore, and she had all the rage and the disbelief for ending up in that situation by her side. She rolled her eyes, grumbling. Fuckin’ scavs. It seemed like their lives were destined to entwine, one way or another.
“Fuckin’ scavs” she repeated, louder this time. Something in her voice must have attracted Judy’s attention, who immediately got out of the bathroom to check if V was disobeying her instructions. She stood before her, arms crossed on her chest: this time she was playing the police officer, or at least so it seemed. She didn’t strike her as the roleplay type of girl.
“It’s not been half an hour yet, Sumi.”
“I didn’t do anything!” she protested, lifting her hands up in surrender. “I was just remembering something 'bout the mission!”
Oddly enough, Judy had nothing more to add: she just sat down, adjusting herself so V could lay an arm on the back of the couch right above her shoulders. Judy then turned towards her to caress her cheek with an elegant finger, careful not to remove the pomade she had just spread on her face. Luckily her sweet smile was still there, V thought, feeling herself breath in relief. In her life of escapes, daily horrors and impossible missions, only Heaven – and maybe all the Gods she had tried to turn to all through her life – knew how much she needed a shelter like Judy was. Pure, brave. She was the hand, Judy was the mind and heart. A perfect combination.
“You’re back, and you’re safe” she whispered. “That’s the only thing that matters, believe me.”
“Yeah, but I fell right into the dumbest trap in the whole universe.”
She let that confession slip through a barely audible murmur, muffled by the pillow she was hiding her face in. V had hoped that moment would never come, but how could she lie to Judy? She was always there for her, even during her most pathetic moments… such as that one. And when she saw her standing on the doorstep, a worried light in Judy’s eyes, she couldn’t stop herself from spilling every detail about that catastrophic mission. Judy didn’t laugh, at least not visibly: she would just shake her head while looking for some disinfectant and smiled, more out of relief than to make fun of her. But yeah, she deserved to be made fun of for a long time, or at least until the next day.
Johnny’s pissed off voice was still tormenting her. Can’t believe I’m getting trapped in the brain of Night City’s dumbest merc! He was going to rub it in her face for days, no doubt. She was scared before, yes, but most of all she was annoyed by her own foolishness: that really was the dumbest trap of all times. And she fell for it hook, line and sinker.
“Ah Jude, I’m a complete gonk” she whimpered, punching the magenta pillow still covering her face. Flomp. “No one would ever believe a random guy who offers an incredible virtu and suddenly asks you to follow him so he can prove it! I honestly have no idea what got into me. One moment I was in his shack, the second after Johnny was yelling me to wake up and I found myself naked in a fuckin’ filthy bathroom!” The pillow was starting to annoy her: she threw it on the floor out of anger. “And full of fuckin’ scavs! I had to knock five of them out to reach the locker where they hid all my clothes and weapons. Barehanded. I couldn’t even use my mantis blades, ‘cause the moment they heard a single noise, they were gonna jump at my throat, I’m sure of that. That way, it would have taken me a lot of time to come back home. And…”
“V.” Judy placed a finger on her lips and – since that usually wasn’t enough to shut her up, to Judy’s experience – she cupped her cheeks, looking right into her eyes. “It could have happened to anyone, ok? The most important thing is that you’re back. And now you’re with me. Stop blaming yourself for everything, it’s not worth it.”
She kissed her lips, allowing V to enjoy that warmth for an infinitesimal yet splendidly long moment. The smell of her lipstick was sweet, it made her lips even softer. She tasted like strawberry. Reluctantly, she found herself smiling through that kiss. Oh Judy, you’re the only person who can make every trouble seem so distant.
For a moment they were shrouded in the silence of the evening. Then, down in the street someone started yelling to another person, an angry voice. A car horn, the uproar of a bike running at full speed who knew where. Spring was coming, along with its city sounds and colors so similar to the winter ones, but those who had lived all their lives in the streets could tell them apart with eyes closed. For a moment she wondered if dreaming about summer and all that it implicated still made sense, somehow.
V was the one to break the silence between them: whenever her mind became too crowded with thoughts, running away was always the best choice, trying to leave them behind. At least for a while.
“How can you put up with me, Jude?”
“Because it’s you, I guess. Without you my days wouldn’t be the same… and because I love you. I believe it has something to do with that, yeah.”
“Interesting. You’re in love with the dumbest merc in Night City and still haven’t made a public announcement? Like, I don’t know, on a rented ad space with giant neon lights?” She let a melodramatic whisper out, sinking her head once more into the back of the couch but never losing sight of Judy, to check on her expression. “Maybe I’d find a job with a fixer who only hired completely gonk mercs. Why working with real pros, when you can have a – ouch!”
Judy suddenly bit her shoulder.
“Shut up, calabacita.”
“Hey! First you bite me, call me calabacita and then you shush me?” she rubbed the point where Judy had bitten so mercilessly, pretending to be outraged in her best you-hurt-my-feelings impression. Judy reinforced her message by pushing a finger on her stomach.
“Yes, if you talk rubbish. You reached the maximum daily amount of self-deprecation.”
She completed the picture by laying a small kiss on her cheek, delicate as the one she gave her after getting out of the Clouds a century before, after the fight with Maiko and the Claws bosses. Close enough to her lips to make shivers run down her spine. Her usual magic. Every time it ran out, V found herself wanting some more.
“You’re good to go, the ointment has dried. Shall we order pizza?”
“Alright” V agreed, stretching her arms. Her legs were numb, but she was willing to pay any price for those moments together. “Usual place?”
“Of course. No other one has your fav on the menu… they know you as the ‘extra avocado’ girl by now.” She chuckled, getting up to search for her phone. “I’m adding a couple of beers. It’s one of those nights you desperately need a drink, am I wrong?”
V nodded. Judy always took the hint.
*
Two hours later, after both pizzas were gone and a bottle of beer reserved for special occasions was shared – the large one they usually ordered when it was time to party or soothe themselves - they had cleared the table and decided the best spot to enjoy the night was in their bed. Judy demanded she would undress – not in the way V was wishing, though. She then proceeded to put all of V’s clothes into the laundry machine, and lent her a pair of blue shorts and a t-shirt with a print of Delicate Weapon’s cover, Lizzy Wizzy’s single, a gift from Roxanne, who hadn’t stopped a minute to think she actually needed to buy a Bushido shirt, considering Judy’s taste. Ironically, the thought had crossed her mind only after the purchase was already done. It looks good on you, Judy had commented, gifting her with another heart-melting smile. Way more than a black eye. And to that, V would answer by sticking her tongue out.
“Feeling any better now?”
“Yeah, more or less.”
Being nestled up on that white blanket, surrounded by pillows, was more than pleasant. The night was fading away out of the window, yet feeling Judy’s warmth on her body, her breath gently moving a strand of purple hair, finally allowed V to relax a little. All the anxiety, fear and frenzy accumulated during that mission were simply flowing away, disappearing at the sole touch of Judy’s fingers. She closed her eyes a bit.
“It’s just that… I was scared, Jude, and it doesn’t make sense. I should be used to this kinda thing, survived far too many days like this one… still, I was terrified.”
“You’re human, V. It’s only natural you’re feeling this way.” She caressed her lips, warming her up inside. “But I was sure you’d make it. You got out of a lotta different situations, and came back to me every time. It’s an honor, you know?”
“Pleased to make you feel honored, Doctor Judy. No other person in Night City knows my problems better than you do.”
“Like that time you told me braindancing during your periods makes your head all fuzzy” she laughed, aiming a knowing look at her. V grunted: their first date urgently needed to disappear from the fabric of space and time, right into the giant black hole of all the flirts destined for disaster. That way, though, Judy wouldn’t be able to use that example as an improper secret weapon anymore. And she would never miss a chance to, there was no doubt about it.
“And you almost crashed on me getting off the BD chair. You were adorably clumsy.”
“Do you really wanna play this game, Miss Alvarez? ‘Cause I might retaliate with all the texts you sent me while drunk.” She lifted her fingers to count, a pensive expression on her face. “I have a looong list. Coud even list them by heart, starting from ‘know wat rhymes with Judy? BOOTY’ followed by ‘your cuuuuute’, and -
“Not. Fair.”
The kiss she meant to shut her up with was born chaste, but their bodies were too close: soon Judy’s hands slipped under her shirt, caressing her stomach, her belly, under her breasts. Her fingers were warm, inviting. V deepened that contact, brushing her lips with the tip of her tongue, a request for something more Judy was more than happy to satisfy. She breathed in her perfume, as if trying to memorize it, bit on her lower lip, lightly touched one of her nipples with a fingernail, and received a muffled moan in response. Two to one. Judy’s moans were gentle, delicate, and every time she felt incredibly lucky for being the cause of them. The way Judy’s eyes sparkled whenever she looked at her, the complete, endearing trust she placed in her, filled V with joy, a subtle bliss she could never even begin to explain. Perhaps some feelings just could not be put into words.
The blue and purple neon lights from the living room could reach them even up there, embracing them and mixing with all the city lights: looking at the wall with eyes half-closed, it almost felt like being underwater. An aquarium locking the rest of the world out, V thought, placing her lips on Judy’s neck.
Judy quivered at that contact.
“My head is a mess, Jude” she confessed in a whisper. “A shitload of sensations. I don’t even wanna have sex… well, yeah, I actually want to” – she added quickly – “but I can’t.”
Judy smiled. She brushed a finger on her lips, drawing their outline. “You never have to apologize with me, V. I said I would take care of you, didn’t I? Cuddle times are always included in the package.”
For a moment she lost herself inside Judy’s eyes, cradled by the safety they emanated. Talking about her problems had never been easy.
“One moment I think everything will be alright, the other I’m fuckin’ scared and I just wanna scream and disappear, run away with you and forget about all that happened. I feel so confused… I’m trying to blame it on the Relic, telling myself everything will be okay once all of this is over, but I just can’t convince myself. I always managed to get by somehow, ever since I was a kid, but now I feel like everything is crumbling apart. I just want it to end, all the fear and pain, this horrible feeling I’m losing myself along the way…”
V took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. She was about to cry, tears already clawing at her throat. She hated being seen falling to pieces, so foolishly small and fragile and different from the person she saw in the mirror every morning, ready to take on a new gig with a confident smile. Sumire was the little girl who always cried herself to sleep, Valerie had no need for that anymore. V was a new person, built piece after piece to replace the frightened child she once was. V knew how to take care of herself, the Relic shard was nothing more than a nuisance to her… yet some days Sumire kept coming back, and she didn’t know how to wipe her tears away.
Showing that side of her was something she loathed. Not to Judy, though.
As usual, Judy had figured everything out without even needing for her to say a word. She opened her arms, inviting V to turn around and lay her head on her chest, so she could stroke her hair.
“V… I know there’s something beautiful waiting for us, after all this shit. Oregon, the sun, the mountains. A journey for the two of us, without worries if not how much we’ll hate every bed from every motel we’ll stop by.” She kissed her head. “We can run away from everything and hide out at my grandparents’, imagine a new life. Whenever I feel hopeless, I remember how lovely the sunrise we saw together was, at the Laguna Bend pier… I always try to convince myself there’s still something just as wonderful waiting for us, beyond all this pain. We deserve a different ending, and we’ll get there together, Sumi. Believe me.”
From that spot she could perfectly see her tattoos, despite the darkness surrounding them. She brushed a fingertip against the ghost in the shell on her upper arm, smiling: Judy had explained the meaning of that drawing before. They had watched an old movie together, a movie about cyborgs and the birth of a soul inside a synthetic body, set in a city that almost looked like the lovechild of Kabuki and Japantown, but more old-fashioned. From that day she could recall the blanket wrapped around them to shield them from the cool air of the evening, Judy searching through some files trying to find the right one in a multitude of movies and videos from her vintage collection, their pizza still warm on the small table, spreading its delicious fragrance all through the apartment. She liked the main character: something in her voice and body language reminded her of Yoshimi, yet thinking about her sister, for once, didn’t make her sad. At some point, Judy had took her hand and never left it for the rest of the movie. They had stayed like that, fingers entwined, as scenes kept scrolling across the laptop screen.
A ghost in the shell. But who really was the ghost and who was the shell, between her and Johnny? What if they actually ended up turning into the same person, and there was no way of removing the Relic without erasing both of them?
Judy’s fingers started stroking her hair once more. She was waiting for an answer, or maybe not. Perhaps she was just looking to comfort her the way she knew, to lift a part of that burden off her shoulders. Share it with her, somehow.
The radio station had just began offering a selection of ambient tracks. The Relic was threatening to start droning again, weighing down on her mind, confusing her thoughts, but she had no intention of wasting that night.
“You’re the only reason that keeps me going on, Jude. I mean it.”
“And you’re the same to me. Without you, no one would have ever lifted a finger to help Ev… and me.” She felt her sigh, chest raising and lowering to the rhythm of her breath. “I started hoping again thanks to you, and I didn’t think it was possible anymore. You came in like a hurricane… in a good way, you gonk” she added with a chuckle, sensing V’s fake pout. “You’ve changed so many things, V. First of all, my life.”
“Judy…”
Answering the way she truly wanted was impossible, as it was expressing all she felt in a single sentence. Some confessions wait for the night to come out, that hour when part of the city was sleeping and other raced at full speed under the blinding lights, while a third one whispered stories: two in the morning was the moment thoughts were reborn. Sitting next to Judy, a beer in hand, became her personal therapy to go back to the past and dig out the only memories she needed, the ones no longer able to hurt her. Simply letting herself go, next to someone willing to listen.
“You’ve changed everything. Even through all this shit I’m living, Jackie’s death and all the rest, I’ve never felt alone. Not a single time. You’re one of the few people I can open up to… and with ‘open up’ I mean about my past, about what happened… about everything. Without hiding a single thing.” She cleared her throat, choking back the tears. “If something is actually waiting for us at the end of it all, if we can really dream of a better life, then I want to fight for it with all my strengths. We’ll leave Night City behind and be happy, just like that… ‘cause we deserve it. And I could never think of a future where we’re not together.”
Perhaps it really was because of the night, she pondered. Or maybe it was Judy making her feel like everything, eventually, could be fixed. The small loving gestures they exchanged every day, the way Judy stood by her side without asking a thing. She had learned to rely on her day after day, and Judy too had finally understood what it truly meant to live with someone she loved, without any compromise or fear, her only desire to be together and face everything with someone instead of being alone. V would hear her laugh, and suddenly something was blooming inside her. Something precious, something new.
She had no intention of letting that feeling go.
Judy did nothing more than keep stroking her hair. With her, there was no need for further explanations: one of the many things about her V was grateful for.
“You’re staying for the night, aren’t you?”
“You should know by now there’s no way I could escape your grasp” she challenged emphatically, kissing her fingers and brushing her head against Judy’s neck to tickle her, just to receive another poke on the nose in response.
“Good. I can’t imagine you home all alone… and it’s time for another medication. You need to sit still a little while longer, Miss Sumire Valerie.”
“Roger, Doctor Judy!”
Her eyelids grew heavier by the minute. She could feel her body surrender to the soft mattress, to Judy shifting position and hugging her from behind, letting V’s head rest against her neck. Judy’s breath caressing her nape, so warm and familiar. She could hear her murmur something as Judy’s fingers were holding her, sinking into the fabric and skin, almost afraid she would fade away at some point.
She was sleepy, but had no intention of giving in, not yet.
“Jude?”
“Mh?”
“Why, in a city so big and full of cool and interesting people, you actually chose me?”
“I don’t know how many times you’ve asked since we’re together” Judy whispered against her neck.
“And…?”
“And the answer is always the same: I like you, and I want to be with you. Is that enough?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
“I couldn’t picture myself next to any other girl, Miss Gonkest-Merc-in-Night-City.”
V let out a sleepy laugh. Judy had probably set a timer on her radio or something, because the music stopped after the last song, the final notes fading out in a muffled diminuendo. There was not much traffic in the streets anymore, only some cars and bikes still passing by at full speed every now and then, the roar of the engine echoing in the distance after their first turn. Maybe they were riding towards Japan Town. All the neon lights, advertising screens, shops still open and wide illuminations almost embracing the crowd made you feel like you were part of a whole urban ecosystem that in the end was nothing more than another illusion…
Judy was murmuring, accompanying her flow of thoughts. V clung to that sound, trying to identify the words, but they apparently belonged to a song she had never heard before. Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever seen, Judy whispered against her hair, holding V in her arms by the waist and it was hard to tell where her body began and where Judy’s ended: her warmth was overwhelming, it became the only important thing in that moment. That surely was an old love song. She never heard many on the radio, but perhaps she wasn’t paying enough attention… that I put down in words how wonderful life is while you’re in the world, Judy’s voice was filling her heart, relaxing her muscles. It was so sweet. She closed her eyes and her hand slipped on Judy’s, grasping onto her fingers. She held her back.
It was nice sleeping next to someone in a real bed, that was the last rational thought her mind could form before completely falling asleep.
*
The sound of a car honking sneaked between her dreams and wakefulness, abruptly forcing her out of her sleep. Sun. That wasn’t her bed, she gathered her thoughts while getting up, mind still hazy.
One minute she was sleeping soundly, legs crossed with Judy’s, the other, morning had already came and light arrogantly seeped in through the window, accompanied by the usual street sounds of the waking Watson district. She rubbed her eyes and looked around: bed was empty, but it wasn’t hard to tell where Judy was. She got up stretching her arms, then fixing Lizzy’s t-shirt and letting herself be guided by the delicious smell filling her nostrils. Coffee, warm toasts and something else she failed to recognize, maybe instant pancakes? Similar to the ones from the All Foods stall in front of her house she saw every morning, but didn’t manage to taste yet because she always forgot to…
It was really promising.
Judy was fumbling by the kitchen counter, humming just like the previous night. She was so deep in thoughts she didn’t even notice V next to her, and when the girl surprised her with a kiss, Judy’s smile was overflowing with joy. When was the last time she had seen her so happy? Probably the morning they shared at Laguna Bend, but that was a different kind of joy, less lighthearted, an happiness tangled with a deep reflection… now she was radiant. It almost looked like she could finally leave everything behind, happy of waking up next to someone, of being with V in that kitchen, to cook up some breakfast and laugh at her jokes. It was nice seeing her like that, she thought, and felt her heart leap right up to her throat.
Those were the small things she dreamed of. A peaceful life.
“Hey” Judy smiled, returning the kiss. She was wearing the apron V had gifted her as a souvenir from Kabuki market, the one with “Kiss the Chef” printed on it, that V had immediately crossed and corrected with “Tech”. “Good morning, sleepyhead. Had a good night?”
“Wonderful, yeah. Real preem. Didn’t kick you too much, right?”
“No, you slept just like a baby. Didn’t even speak as you normally do.”
V let out a sound that was half a laugh and half a groan. Apparently, one night she had put together an interesting speech about sticks and food scooped off the ground, to which Judy had started listening in response, only to agree with her just long enough to swiftly put her back to sleep. That episode made such an impression on Judy, she never missed a chance to mention it. At least I didn’t get up and head for your study only to get stuck there until you found me, V used to answer back, and to that Judy would start laughing again. V pretended to be outraged every time, but the truth was she loved seeing Judy laugh like that: she was different from the sad girl who had asked her to help Evelyn. So much no one would have probably recognized her.
“Breakfast?” she asked, sitting on a stool by the counter. Judy placed a plate in front of her, a knowing look on her face, after pouring a generous spoonful of syrup on her pancakes. They were a lot, well cooked and the pan Judy had used was still hot on the stove. The smell of sugar was everywhere now, tickling at her nostrils.
“A nice and proper breakfast, just me and you. Suze will have to wait” Judy added, sitting next to her. “I’m going to work later today. You’re leaving soon?”
“Nah, if Regina needed me she would have called by now. I can take the morning off.”
She stole a piece of Judy’s pancake, stuffing it in her mouth with a winning expression on her face, and while she looked at Judy sticking her tongue out in response, the thought of that normality hit her like a punch in the gut. Waking up every day next to her, organizing the hours they would spend separated and those they would see each other again. Doing laundry, watching a movie, hanging out in Watson during the humid summer nights, welcoming the breeze like an unexpected gift. Enjoy every single minute, without a single worry in the world, facing one problem at a time. A simple life, where Relic was just a strange meaningless word heard in the local news and forgotten five minutes after. A life where Johnny Silverhand was just her childhood hero and nothing more than a few songs to sing out loud to in her car...
She took a deep breath. Johnny was still silent: he was respecting their pact. And yet, she had to decide what to do soon enough, start to imagine how their paths would part, and the sole thought was making her sick. But Judy was there, in front of her, surrounded by the light of a late spring morning, still quietly humming a song. She was gorgeous. V could finally hope of better times with all her strengths, thanks to her.
Yes, fighting for that kind of life was absolutely worth it. And if clawing and scratching through life was the best thing she could do, then she was going to give her all. For Judy, for herself, for the people who entered her life and left her something precious. For the ones she had loved in past, and for those who decided to stay, despite everything.
Because something good was on the way. She could feel it in her bones.
“You know, I never tried this type of pancakes before” she started talking again, dunking a piece of it into the syrup. They were so good… V set out to include them in her usual breakfast from that moment on. Perhaps eating something was actually healthier than guzzling coffee on an empty stomach. “They’re delicious.”
“It’s thanks to the dough. And to the chef, it goes without saying.”
“You’re just not only a braindance expert, but also a technician, doctor and now a chef too. I really have the most talented girlfriend in aaaall of Night City!”
“Gonk.” She punched her shoulder, chuckling. How could she have lived all those years without hearing her laughter?
“By the way, I need to medicate you before you leave. And no eye-rolling allowed” Judy warned her, catching her frustrated gaze. “Sometimes I’m baffled by your lack of gratitude, Miss Sumire Valerie.”
“It’s a gift of nature. Just like my extraordinary sense of humor.”
V stood up and followed her to the couch, surrounding her waist to nibble on her neck. She was just waiting to hear her laugh one more time: Judy didn’t let her down.