Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

I will not falter.

I will march straight ahead and fulfill a momentous task.

Today, I will ask Aoi on a date!

Hm… Well, no. Not today. I’m… erm, planning to ask on Valentine’s Day, after all.

Truth be told, I’m surprised that Aoi hasn’t figured me out by now. Hiiro certainly has, and she teases me about it every moment we are alone. I can, at least, appreciate that she doesn’t blab about this to anyone. If Nagisa were to find out, she definitely would yell about it — not to mention inform Aoi of how I… feel.

Speaking of which, I’m equally surprised that Nagisa hasn’t barraged me with questions. She often butts into our conversations when Aoi and I, quote-unquote, “get lost in our own world.” Certainly, that implies an atmosphere of romance, doesn’t it? And she’s not so dense that she wouldn’t notice, right? But if Aoi doesn’t notice, then I suppose I should I assume that Nagisa wouldn’t either.

Nonetheless… I promised myself I would steel my resolve for Valentine’s Day.

“Tsubaki-chan, what are you thinking about?”

“Hm? Nothing,” I respond a moment too fast, snapping my head up to meet her gentle lilac eyes.

Hiiro giggles a little as she works the chocolate chip cookie dough like a pro. She makes quick, easy movements as she scoops out perfectly sized chunks and rolls them into smooth rolled balls. One by one, the cookies plop onto the lined tray, and she flattens them out with the palm of her hand.

I stare at the cookie dough as her deft hands prepare each piece without faltering. The kitchen island she uses as her workspace is spotless, and I can’t say the same for my little section. Dozens of little dough bits and clumps of flour are scattered around the countertop, and I frown.

I still don’t fully comprehend how all this “baking” and “science” works.

I glance down at my own bowl of sticky cookie dough, then over at my glove-covered hands. I suppose I’ll have to figure it out soon.

The sound of the oven door shutting jolts me to attention (the noise wasn’t even that loud!), and I turn to look at Hiiro, who stares at me with a smug smirk spread across her face.

“Nothing, hm?” she hums as she slides over beside me. Hiiro nods at the cookie dough. “Are you worried about your cookies? That, perhaps, a certain someone won’t like them?”

I let out a quiet huff, then glance down as my face heats up. “Eh… No, of course not…” I mumble.

She pats my head a few times while letting out that familiar sisterly laugh. “Don’t worry so much about that, Tsubaki-chan. You’re going to make Aoi-kun so happy.”

“Th-that’s not what I’m worried about,” I say back, my voice going even quieter.

“No? Then what?”

“I’m worried about…” I dig my fingers into the squishy, soft cookie dough, frowning a little. “…if this doesn’t turn out the way I want it to.” I scoop out a small ball of dough, roll it around in my hands, and try to flatten it into a cookie-shaped disc, just like Hiiro has been doing.

“You mean the confession?”

My ears immediately warm up, and I keep my head down. Letting out a sharp breath, I quickly start working on the next cookies without answering.

Hiiro doesn’t miss a beat, though. “Aoi-kun will love anything you make for her. She already loves everything about you.”

“You’re just saying that,” I say, my voice somehow even quieter than before.

“I’m not.” She bumps her hip against mine. “When have I ever been wrong?”

I sigh again, nearly crushing the cookie I’m prepping. “I don’t want to ruin anything. I’m happy, Hiiro.”

“No, you’re not,” she insists. “You’re finding excuses to avoid her. Again.” Hiiro’s voice goes soft, and she rests her hand on my shoulder, squeezing gently. “Don’t regret anything.”

I uncurl my fingers and stare at the half-smushed cookie, then let out another exasperated sigh. She’s right. If I don’t act soon, when will I ever tell Aoi? And who knows? Someone else — someone who isn’t me — could sweep her off her feet… and that makes my stomach coil up in all sorts of terrifying, frustrating, jealous ways. She’s popular. She could wink the panties off any woman she looks at. She could have anybody, but I want her to want me.

Oh, dammit.

As I roll the dough back up and start flattening it out, I whisper, “Thank you, Hiiro.”

“Anything for you, Tsubaki-chan,” she replies in her usual peppy voice. She pats me on the back, then shuffles off to clean the dishes.

A little smile spreads across my face as I glance over my tray of unbaked sweets. The cookies I’ve made don’t look so bad after all.

“Good work, everyone.”

After our efficient practice session, Aoi flashes a smile at everyone, and Nagisa immediately lets out an excited yell as she puts her beloved guitar away. She runs toward Hiiro and grabs her wrist with both hands, jumping up and down, her guitar case bouncing along with her blonde ponytail. I clear my throat and start disinfecting my microphone and stand, while Aoi looks on, still grinning.

“Hi-i-i-ro!” Nagisa exclaims, a huge smile on her face. “Come on! You promised me—”

The lilac-haired girl laughs and puts a finger to her lips. “Shh, Nagisa,” she says in a little trill. “I don’t want to make Tsubaki-chan and Aoi-kun think we’re ditching them.”

“Ditch away,” Aoi replies.

“It’s fine,” I mumble at the same time.

Aoi lets out a light laugh. I stare after her, watching her jet black hair fall over her face as she kneels down to pack some equipment away. I wonder, just how fluffy is Aoi’s hair? I’m sure I would have a fun time ruffling her hair.

Hiiro’s hand lands on my shoulder, and she pushes me forward. “Go for it,” she whispers.

I glance back at her, hoping that my face has formed into a glare rather than a look of embarrassment, but Hiiro’s already dragging a bouncy Nagisa out of the practice room. My eyes dart to my purse… and the inconspicuous clear bag of sweets hidden inside it.

Then my eyes shift right back to Aoi’s profile, giving me a perfect view of her beautifully sculpted jaw. A small smile graces her face — one that she rarely shows. Now, she’s standing at the DJ’s booth, focused on her laptop screen as a myriad of windows reflects in her eyes.

I rummage around in my bag until I grasp the cool, crinkling package. Yet, my palms burn hot and sweaty, and I briefly wonder if the cookies would melt if I hold them too tight.

I pull the gift out and stare down at it. A half-dozen of chocolate chip cookies sit in a little gift bag with a simple pattern and neat blue bow on top. I made sure to keep my decorations ambiguous — if I felt things weren’t going well, then perhaps I could wave this off as friend chocolates or something. Surely, I’d be disappointed if things came to that, but it’s better to have a backup plan, isn’t it…?

The silence in the air is deafening.

What do I say? Should I even say something? I don’t want to ruin our friendship.

But… no. I don’t want to give up before I know the answer.

“Um, Aoi —”

“Tsubaki, are —”

Aoi glances over at me, and I quickly hide the cookies behind my back as the room drops back down to an awkward silence. This time, an overwhelming buzz lingers in my ears.

“You go first,” she says, closing her laptop and turning her complete attention to me.

But that cool expression on her face just makes my palms clammier and my heart race faster against my throat.

“Erm, uh, no!” I exclaim. “It’s, um, not important. You go first.”

Even I know my face is already turning red, and I glance down at my shoes, frowning. The sound of her steps hitting the linoleum floor echoes in the silence, and she stops as soon as her slick black boots are in my line of vision.

“Tsubaki?” Aoi whispers.

“Y-Yes?”

I gulp and look up. She’s not smiling anymore.

“Is something wrong? You’ve been acting weird,” she says, a small pout on her face. “And not just now — you seemed off during practice, too.”

“No, it’s fine!” I say, a little too loud, a little too fast. “Here are some cookies!” I step back, bow my head, and offer her the treats.

As I stare down at our shoes, the seconds tick by.

One, two… three…

…?

She laughs a little again, her fingers brushing mine as she takes the gift. “This is for me?” she muses, a gentleness to her tone that makes my ears go red. “I can’t wait to try them.”

I let out a deep exhale, then straighten up. She’s already untied the top and lifted a cookie to her mouth but pauses when I look at her. Aoi’s smile has spread across her lightly red face, and I immediately start twirling my hair around my finger.

“Oh, it’s nothing,” I murmur, shaking my head. “I’m sure you get tons of presents, Aoi…”

Especially today, but I don’t dare say that out loud.

“I suppose I do,” she says slowly, “but I’ve never gotten any from you .” She looks at the cookie in her hand fondly, then takes a huge bite.

“Huh? What do you mean? But, for your birthday and for Christmas, we…”

My voice trails off as Aoi happily munches on the treat. Her eyes sparkle, and I let out a little sigh. Thank goodness it at least tastes good. It takes her another bite to finish it off, and she chews slowly, as if savoring it. 

Her eyes focus on me again, and I squirm from her intense gaze. She flicks her tongue out, and I can’t help but stare as that tongue runs across every last corner of her mouth. I swallow the lump in my throat, then snap my gaze up to her eyes. She wipes her lips with her thumb, then laughs, and my heart starts speeding up when she smiles. 

“You’ve never given me a gift like this by yourself,” she says, scratching the back of her head sheepishly. "So… thank you, Tsubaki.

“Um, it was nothing!” I say hastily. “I… wanted to thank you! For… for being such a great leader.” Aoi’s smile widens as the words refuse to quit spilling out of my lips. “And writing and composing our songs. And… for inviting me to Rondo. I’ve learned so much about music because of you — ah, um…”

She chuckles a little. “You’re talking like I gave you all of this. You do know the four of us did this together, right? We always work hard to make Rondo the best that it can be.”

“Right! Right…”

For a moment, a gentle smile graces her handsome face, and my heart skips a beat. Her golden eyes draw me in like a bee enamored by honey, and I can’t help but take a step closer.

“Well… is there anything else you wanted to say to me, Tsubaki?”

If I reach out and open my heart to her, then maybe, just maybe, I can take her hand.

“Yes. There is one more thing.”

I let out a quiet breath, my fingers trembling as I grip my jeans. Here goes everything.

“I… I like you, Aoi. That’s all.” I swallow the lump in my throat, then shake my head. “No, that’s not right…”

I take another step forward. My eyes stay trained on Aoi’s, watching for something, anything from her. But, as always, her poker face is unbeatable. 

Still, I refuse to back down.

“I love you, Aoi. I think I’ve been in love with you for a long time.”

As soon as the words leave my lips, I tilt my head right back down.

The seconds tick by slowly again.

One, two, three, four, five… six… seven… eight…

I finally glance up, and she’s covering her mouth with her hand as her eyes tear up. My heart drops down to my stomach, and I turn away. My legs are heavy, but I take a step toward the door anyway.

Aoi catches my wrist and makes me face her. A huge, mischievous smirk is plastered across her face.

She starts laughing, releasing a loud, hysterical cackle as she struggles to calm down. My face heats up, and I pout as I glare at her. Really? She wants to mess with me at a time like this?

“Aoi!”

Her smile grows even wider as she wipes her eyes and stares straight at me. “It took you a long time to confess to me, Tsubaki. Thank you.”

My heart skips a beat, and any feelings of anger or frustration fade. Instead, I feel that familiar anxious embarrassment consume my very soul.

“Ah? Eh? You already knew?”

“Of course I did,” she says, her smile more like Nagisa’s shit-eating one than her usual princely trademark. “You’re too obvious.”

Am I supposed to be flattered?

“I… oh. Then, umm… how do you feel about me?”

Aoi chuckles, leans down, and tilts my chin up two of her cool, slender fingers. Her forehead presses against mine, and I feel her warm breath on my cheeks as her golden irises fill my vision.

“Aoi?”

She closes her eyes — and so do I — as her soft lips touch mine. She’s slow but certain — her hands rest on my hips, and she squeezes gently, forcing a little moan out of me. I grumble a bit, then throw my arms around her neck, pulling her closer.

Aoi chuckles, and her tongue runs against my lips, prodding for permission. I let her deepen the kiss and stifle a little moan as she tightens her grip around me, growing bolder by the second. Her kiss sets a fire off in me, and I can’t get enough of her touch. I run my hands through her soft, fluffy locks, trying to tug her even closer. She tastes like sugar, chocolate, and fire — pure blue flames that engulf me in an unending wave of heat.

We break apart with sharp gasps.

Aoi smiles and recovers first.

“Does that answer your question?”

I inhale as much air as I can, then exhale through my nose. I throw Aoi the best glare I can muster up — but I’m sure it’s losing its effectiveness considering the burning state of my face — and pout at her. “Yes. Yes, it does,” I grumble.

Her smile widens into that frustrating (and cute) smirk. “Good.”

“So…” I start, still trying to glare at her. It doesn’t faze her. “Let me make sure I’m understanding this right. You knew all this time and didn’t bother to say anything?”

“Guilty,” she replies, sticking her tongue out playfully. “I wondered how long you would keep this up. Plus…” Aoi scratches the back of her head, then glances down at me, her eyes softening. “You’re really cute when you’re embarrassed. I like that a lot.”

“Wh-What? You’re so mean!” I say, hiding my face in my hands. “All this time… you knew…”

Her cool hands cover mine, and she pulls them away from my face. She brings them to her face instead and plants a kiss on one of my fingers, then another, and another until she’s kissed all of them and my head is on the verge of blowing up. I lean up and cup her cheeks with my hands, and she tilts her head to the side, pressing her lips against the palm of my hand. Her face turns the sweetest shade of pink, and a ridiculous smile spreads across my face.

“I love you, Aoi,” I murmur, shifting to the tips of my toes so I can pull her down and plant a kiss on her nose.

Aoi’s smile shifts to a small one reserved only for me, and she wraps her arms around my waist. She lets out a soft breath, presses our foreheads together, and kisses me softly on the lips.

“I love you, too, Tsubaki.”

She pulls me closer, and I sink against her neck, squeezing her tight as her warmth envelops me. My heart races against my chest, and its beats are thunderous in my ears; I hope she doesn’t notice. Well, even if she does, I suppose she’ll just revel in the fact that she can make me feel like I’m free-falling through the sky.

For a moment, her embrace is all I feel… and all I need.

Damn this woman. Somehow, she’s turned me into a lovestruck fool.

But… I don’t mind one bit.

Chapter Text

Bonus #1: on February 13th, at a nearby café…

“Ah… Tsubaki is cute,” Aoi says with a dreamy sigh.

She props her chin on her palm and leans against the café table, staring out the window as passers-by stroll down the street. It’s a pleasant, if not chilly, day today, and nothing could ruin her good mood. Nagisa, on the other hand, stares at the DJ, eyes wide.

“Eh? Come on, Aoi. Why do you always have to bring her up?” Nagisa whines, exhaling dramatically. “You two aren’t even together. It’s not that exciting. Let’s talk about something else. Like pudding! Or music!”

The DJ rolls her eyes, then takes a sip of her coffee. “You wouldn’t understand. Hiiro probably waited patiently until you stopped being a dense dummy who didn’t notice her advances.”

“You’re one to talk!” Nagisa retorts, crossing her arms over her chest. “You’re exactly that!”

“Oh, please. I know what I’m doing,” Aoi says with a cheeky smile. She flips her bangs out of her eyes. “I’m playing it cool.”

Grumbling, the guitarist leans over the café table and swipes Aoi’s croissant. She takes a huge bite out of it — some of the chocolate shavings spilling onto the table — and tosses it back onto the plate. “Cool my butt. You just don’t want to be the one who says it first,” she says, her voice muffled from chewing the snack.

“What? No.” Aoi flashes another smile, the same one she prepares for her interviews, fan meetings, and all-around poker face needs. “If Tsubaki weren’t so damn cute when she’s embarrassed, I’d consider confessing first.”

Nagisa finishes chewing, grabs the DJ’s coffee, and downs the rest of it in one gulp. “One,” she starts, holding up her fingers as she counts off, “just confess already. Two, what if Tsubaki falls in love with someone else? Three, that coffee sucked, so get me another.”

“One,” Aoi says in the same way, her poker face untouched, “I won’t. Tomorrow’s Valentine’s Day. I bet Hiiro’s helping Tsubaki plan something. Two, there’s no way she will. Three, no, do it yourself.” She starts laughing, then shakes her head. "Actually, go get me another coffee. You just stole mine, remember?

Nagisa lets out an exasperated sigh. “Where the hell do you get all that unfounded confidence from?”

“Easy. When you’ve hated yourself as much as I have, you figure out ways to overcompensate even while you’re stuck feeling like an imposter.”

“Ugh, I don’t need your self-deprecation.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault I kept getting bullied as a kid,” Aoi says with a lax laugh.

“Just let me be a normal genki girl in peace,” Nagisa groans, throwing her hands in the air.

Aoi smiles again, but this time, she flashes a genuine one that reaches her eyes. “Well, I suppose I have a better answer: I love Tsubaki. I trust that everything will work out just fine.” She immediately lets out a quiet groan and covers her mouth, eyebrows furrowing as her cheeks heat up. “Oh, great. I can’t believe I just said that.”

“God, that was gross, Aoi!” Nagisa yells with a smirk, slamming her palms on the table. “The cool prince finally said something that dorky, huh?”

Nagisa throws her head back and laughs hysterically, clutching her stomach and flailing her legs around as she fails to contain her amusement. She looks nothing like the grumbly, pouty girl from before, and the glances from other café-goers don’t stop Nagisa’s snickering.

Aoi lets out a quiet sigh, ears growing redder by the second.

“I suppose that since it’s the truth, then I shouldn’t be embarrassed saying it out loud, right? I guess we’ll see what happens tomorrow…”

Bonus #2: on February 14th, after Tsubaki’s confession…

“What should we do now?” I muse as we leave the practice room.

Aoi’s cool hand laces with mine and squeezes. “Dunno,” she says. “It’s still early. Maybe we should celebrate?”

I squeeze back, running my thumb gently against hers. “That… sounds nice.”

“Where do you want to go?” she asks, mimicking my movements. At this rate, we’re just going to be playing with each other’s hands the whole day. “We could get something to eat. Maybe dessert if you’re not too hungry. Wander around the park, downtown, wherever.” Aoi clears her throat and pauses. “Or… perhaps a hotel for something else?”

I glance over at her, and she flashes a sultry smile and winks at me, making my face bloom with scorching heat. “Ah— um…”

She leans over and kisses the top of my head. “Maybe we should save that for another day,” Aoi says with a laugh as she pulls away. I grumble quietly under my breath as I struggle to bring my heart rate down. “Come on. Let’s go to that dessert shop you love. There are new pudding flavors.”

I rush through the doors and out toward the street. Aoi starts laughing again as she hurries to keep our hands together.

The chilly air brings relief to my burning face, and I let out a quiet sigh, watching my breath fade away. I shiver a little as Aoi shifts beside me, and the usually drab, grey winter world looks brighter. I glance up at the white sky and half-expect snowflakes to start fluttering through the wind. 

“Pudding sounds good,” I mumble, squeezing her hand.

She squeezes right back and tugs me closer so that our shoulders are nearly touching.

“Okay. Do you want anything else?”

We walk for a few minutes in silence as the question hangs in the air, my heart thumping against my chest. I take a deep breath, and Aoi stops in her tracks, glancing over.

I let go of her hand and instead latch onto her arm, trying to hide my face against her shoulder. Aoi grins and kisses the top of my head again, and we walk side by side, warming each other up on a cold winter’s day.

Bonus #3: on February 15th, at ALTER-EGO…

“Wait! You and Nagisa are dating?”

Hiiro tilts her head to the side, apparently caught off-guard by my sudden question.

“Yes. Did you not know this, Tsubaki-chan?”

“Well, um, no… I, uh, guess I didn’t notice,” I mutter under my breath, staring down at my feet as my face heats up.

She lets out a sweet, lilting laugh as she hides her mouth behind her hand. “I suppose now we know the dense one in Rondo actually is.”

“Ehh… Hiiro!”