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it was odd, how enraptured he was to save the people he knew he once cared about. he couldn’t remember, his mind betraying him before he could write the remnants of the memories out on paper.
a photograph stayed tucked away in his journal he always carried. it was to sketch, write little notes about what he saw that would later be stories in their own book.
he couldn’t remember who the people were.
karl stood between them, and they were both kissing his cheeks. karl was happy, smile widened so much it looked like it hurt, but he couldn’t remember when it was taken, could only vaguely remember snippets of their times together.
he loved them.
he had to have, right? he didn’t believe he would let anyone that close to him, would look so mystified if he didn’t have some sort of attachment to them.
karl walked to his two story home like he was on autopilot, and if he wasn’t so tired he would have stopped and explored his surroundings. the door wasn’t locked, dust coated the surfaces.
it was abandoned.
he wondered why. this was the only home he thought he had. he didn’t think much about it, even though he should have. he pushed through the dust curling in the air, resisting the urge to sneeze, and climbed the ladder towards his bed.
the mildew smell of the sheets didn’t even bother him as he collapsed onto them. he was asleep within minutes.
-
alex was freaking out.
ever since the festival, ever since the wars, the explosions, he had to make sure both of his lovers were safe before even thinking of falling to sleep.
it was nearing early morning, and though sapnap assured that karl would return, as he always did, alex was sitting up and awaiting to hear the sound of the door opening.
he was nearing a full blown panic attack when he glanced towards the clock. 3 am.
karl sometimes got lost, sometimes would take long walks to clear his head but would always come back looking like he was missing something, like he just did something he wasn’t supposed to do.
they didn’t question him, not after the first time when he shut them away for days, because why couldn’t they just believe him?
he was lying to them, but they couldn’t know that.
he was trying to save them, and if that was revealed, they may be gone for good. he was granted a gift by the fates, whose rules were strict along with it, and he did not want to mess with them.
“sap?” alex asked in the dead of night.
outside fire from torches crackled, bugs chirped, a shout in the distance filtered through the thin wood of their home.
“hm?” sapnap blearily opened his eyes, ever a light sleeper, and glanced towards quackity’s rigid form. “q, what’s wrong?”
“he should be back by now,” he was trying to stay calm, keep his breathing even so sapnap didn’t have to worry.
sapnap looked towards the clock, the candle that was always lit casting shadows onto it, but he managed to adjust his eyes enough to be able to see the time.
he was always trying to be the balance in their relationship, staying calm when the others freaked, freaking when the others couldn’t see the harm in what they were doing.
he sat up fully now. he agreed, it was too late to no longer remain composed.
“okay,” he said gently, quietly, rubbed his hand against quackity’s skin, over scars endured during battles. “we’ll go look for him. tommy and tubbo are probably awake, so we’ll ask them if they’ve seen him.”
they dressed quickly, throwing coats over their pajamas and tucking warm, socked feet into their boots.
sapnap grabbed his sword on their way out, but quackity noticed he didn’t bother taking any piece of armour. sapnap always was good at figuring things out, of being intuitive. if he wasn’t taking his netherite, then surely there wasn’t much to worry about.
tommy and tubbo were walking back towards the younger’s home when they caught up to them. the two were carrying bundles of sticks, either to create a campfire or repair tools that needed it.
“hey,” sapnap said, running forward to stand in front of them on the path.
“what,” tommy asked blankly, though a twinge of anger flared through his voice. he was looking anywhere but at the man in front of him. he still had trouble trusting those who betrayed him more than once.
“have you seen karl?” quackity stepped beside his fiancée, and tommy’s resolve fell quickly. he couldn’t be mad at quackity, not even if he was soon to wed a man he deemed untrustworthy.
“big q,” he said in response to seeing him. a smile tugged lightly on his lips, but it was obvious he was trying to force it away.
“he was walking this way, up the path,” tubbo chimed in. “that had to be hours ago, though.”
“did he..” quackity didn’t want to think of the worst. he had to know, though. “did he look okay? hurt at all?”
“just tired,” the older of the teenagers said, “he was stumbling, but i don’t think he was hurt.”
“thank you,” sapnap nodded, and the four walked in the same direction.
sapnap and alex split, the latter turning right towards the destroyed land of l’manberg, and sapnap walked straight.
something was wrong, and alex knew it as soon as he saw the opened door of karl’s old home. a home he hadn’t stayed in for almost a year.
“sap!” he shouted, not bothering to care if anyone else woke up to it.
sapnap came running, and he saw the ajar door before he even stopped.
he held his sword in front of him as the two entered, alex pushed behind him to ensure his safety.
but the home looked more abandoned than ever.
a creak from upstairs and both guys were flinching back, but they moved onward, climbing the unsteady ladder.
sapnap made it up first, and he gasped at the sight he was given.
karl looked drained. he was wearing an unfamiliar cloak, a journal caressed to his chest like he was afraid someone would try to steal it. the bags under his eyes seemed to be accentuated by the dim light filtering through the window, and they noticed dirt was caked onto his clothes and skin.
“oh, karl,” alex mumbled, sadness drifting through his words, “where were you?”
he gently sat on the bed, fingers moving to comb through his hair.
a hand caught his wrist before he got the chance.
karl was never a light sleeper, and the action took both of the younger men off guard. alex flinched, pulled his arm away despite the pain that curled in his heart.
karl recognized them, but not from the beautiful moments they must have shared, but from the worn photograph. the only thing he had of a stable, constant life.
he couldn’t stay there, not now. they already knew too much.
“what’re you doing here, karl?” sapnap asked, voice quiet in the case the older would get startled.
neither of them knew what happened to him, what sort of trauma he had to work through.
“i-“ karl started, pushed past quackity and stood up. he hadn’t let go of that journal. “i gotta go.”
“karl-“ the two began at the same time, but he was halfway down the ladder before that bit of shock settled.
“karl, wait!”
karl stopped, turned, and with teary eyes and a timid smile, he spoke;
“it’s okay. you’ll be okay without me.”
his words could barely register before he ran off into the darkness of uninhabited land.
they followed him into the tree line.
it was like he disappeared.
they shouted, they screamed, they cried.
the only thing left was a photograph, messy letters scribbled on the back:
REMEMBER