Chapter Text
“Mama, can I come with you? I want to see Ryu-nii”
“Shuuji, honey, I’ll just ask Gin-chan and Ryuu to come over, please stay with Anee-san for now?”
“Okay! Please ask Kyo-chan as well”
The kid scampered away, a dinosaur plushie in tow. He looked at his side when he saw that the kid is already having fun with the girls in the courtesan house. A woman with pink hair looked him at the eye and smiled.
“He’s been growing up quite fast, is he not?” , the woman asked with a longing smile, looking at the kid who is now playing tag with the girls. “I can’t help but reminisce when you were still younger, oh, and also Kyouka”
“Anee-san, I’m really thankful for all your help. I’ll make sure that Kyouka’s safe. I’ll let her know that you miss her”, he smiled while he stood up and fixed his hat.
“Please do”, his Anee-san nodded, sipped her tea and continued, “It’s been 4 years, lad. You have to have a good decision by now” , eyes not straying away from blue orbs, she gave him a small smile, signifying her everlasting support.
“I’m going now, Shuuji should be hungry soon, he’s been fairly active since we landed”, he said ignoring the statement from the woman. He received a nod, and he walked out of Kouyou Ozaki’s courtesan house, a place that seem to be full of broken individuals, but together are nourished by a woman, capable enough to become a Port Mafia executive.
Nakahara Chuuya is also a Port Mafia executive, he is their strongest weapon, someone who can whisk anyone off their feet. He is more than confident with his skills and abilities, he does not feel fear and he does not shy away from encounters that calls out for blood. Then, why is it that his hands feels clammy, his collar feels a hole tighter and why is it that he feels a nauseating feeling swelling up from his stomach, forming a lump on his throat?
Ah, maybe it’s because he is now standing right outside a building, housing the mafia’s enemies, no, he’s never this way before when facing his enemies. Then maybe the disturbing feeling is due to the fact that brown mackerel-eye-like eyes are staring back at his own blue ocean eyes, from a cafe below the main office of the Agency.
“well shit, here goes nothing”, he muttered while he crossed the street, hoping that a certain person will just let him do his job without any troubles. AND ofcourse, that is not possible, when a bandaged walking tan coat is already heading towards him.
“Oh, what is this, a chibikko with a disgusting a hat!”, the bastard announced while squinting at him. “what a fucking day”, he muttered along with other profanities. He can throw a fit and just punch the stupid bastard’s face, but he’s here for business, not to entertain a not-so-obvious trap to fall back to old routines.
He hurriedly walked upstairs, but just before he can grab the door, the good for nothing Dazai is already blocking his way. “What?!”, he said the irritation evident on his face. Dazai eyed him, even bent down so that their eyes are on the same level, no confusion in the other’s eyes. Chuuya didn’t realize that he had been holding his breath when Dazai spoke again.
“Chibi, do me a favor, will ya?”, Dazai said, now standing side by side with him, looking straight at the closed door. “Atsushi-kun seems to be going through something, figure it out for me”, Chuuya scoffed, how dare this bastard. “Why the fuck is he my problem now?”
“Well, no-”
“And when did you start caring for other people’s feelings?”, he continued, cutting Dazai off. He side-eyed Dazai, and hell, he missed having the brunette close to him.
“Chuuya! I am a changed man!” , Dazai over-dramatically stated, “but seriously, do something about it”
Chuuya sighed and grumbled a, “whatever, bastard”. He watched as Dazai sauntered forward, pushing the door open alerting the people inside.
He watched how the younger detectives crowded Dazai, how his new partner-the one with glasses and notebook, harshly shoved Dazai on his desk and ordered him to do his job. Ah, these people are far too soft,and Dazai’s smile is by far the best smile he’s ever seen the other have. He’s still standing there, watching all of it unfold. The only people missing from the scene are their woman doctor, and their President-which he’s supposed to meet today to deliver some stuff from his Boss.
“Dazai-san! I already have too much”, he heard the were-tiger muttered, shoulder slumping, with eyes fixed on the mountain of paperworks stashed on his desk.
More conversations can still be heard, but he focused his attention on the kid in front of him, Kyouka.
“Chuuya-nii, you can come in”, the girl shyly said, which also drew the attention of the guy with notebook, Kunikida. “Ah, you’re here, just right on time”, Kunikida said, ushering him to follow.
“Thanks Kyouka”, he smiled and tipped his hat , which earned a blush from the girl.
He followed Kunikida to a room where the President is, he exchanged pleasantries and proceeded to do business.
The whole meeting was cut short when the President received a call from Mori, Chuuya is then allowed to leave. On his way out, he witnessed probably the most envious feeling he’s ever had in his life. His thoughts went back to his little Shuuji, how his baby deserve so much more.
“Dazai-san, please stop, I’m not a kid anymore”, Atsushi said while trying to shrug his mentor off, who is not continuously laughing and ruffling the younger’s hair at the same time.
He watched for a bit more, indulged himself to the a guilty feeling of how things could have been different, especially for Shuuji. He watched as how the Mackerel’s eyes shine brightly, and how he feels more cracks in his heart as he listen to the laughter that rings from the other.
/Atsushi, huh/
He examined how the interaction goes on without any sign of indifference from the other people inside.
/do something about it, huh/
His remember the favor Dazai asked from him. He thought that he won’t be able to do it and that he won’t do it, but as he watch how happy Dazai appear with this kid, he starts to consider.
“I’m going now Kyouka, Anee-san sends her regards”,He said while patting the kid on her head. “ Tell her the same for me Chuuya-nii”, he nodded and was about to head out when he felt a hand on his wrist, “Welcome back, nii-san”
That felt great, he hugged Kyouka and finally came down to a resolution. Earlier this day while discussing some stuff with his Ane-san, he’s heard of how Kyouka was pried away from the clutches of the Mafia, and honestly, he’s happy about it. A new and better chance at life for Kyouka. He also heard of the person who accompanies Kyouka nowadays, the person who keeps her safe, who pulled her away from a life a bloodbath and misery.
“Thank you Kyouka, you can come over anytime, might as well bring your new friend over there”, he said motioning his head towards Atsushi. He saw how Kyouka blushed and nodded.
He left, happy that Kyouka is happy, but bothered. Why is he bothered? Everyone’s at peace, even the Bastard Mackerel seem to have found peace in the light, what is there to feel bad about?
He checked his phone and he immediately realized the reason.
“Mama,can you please tell Ane-san that it’s okay for me to eat cake?”, a pleading voice, but still brought a smile to his face.
“Wait for me baby, let’s eat it together”, he calmly said, walking faster. Thank heavens the child happily agreed without the need for further persuasion. The call ended, and his thoughts came back, clearer than the last.
Ah yes, he feels bad because his a human still. He feels greed and envy. He loves Shuuji so much, he can let everything go just to hold him. He loves Shuuji so much that he can’t help but think of how much happier Shuuji might be if he only knows about his father. How happier they can be altogether.
He’s only human, he succumbs to anger and pain. The day that bastard left, he decided to stripped him off of any rights to a happy life with Shuuji. Dazai made it clear before, and it is clearer now.