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Wait What's Going On?

Summary:

Marinette hadn't had proper sleep in weeks.

Notes:

Time for C R A C K!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Marinette had barely slept at all in the past week. Actually, it was approaching about the eighth day without any sleep at all, and all she understood was last night she got rid of the stale croissants but she didn't remember how. That might be why Tikki seemed to be trying to tell her something but honestly nothing she was saying made sense. As Marinette drank her coffee and tried to register what was going on her phone started to bing with notifications.

All it did was annoy her because after eight consecutive days of Hawkmoth's bitchass akumatizing people to the point she wasn't getting sleep. She could deal with that after collapsing for twenty-four hours.

Two days later it was Monday. Fortunately for her, she had gotten two full nights of sleep and everything made sense other than Tikki just sort of sitting on her desk looking as if she was done with the world. It was also when she checked her phone only to realize that everyone was texting her! She had hundreds of texts and she didn't know why!

So she opened her phone to the class group chat.

Alya: Girl! How did you find him! Holy fuck I think I fear your prowess at using baked goods as weapons!

Nino: I...

Adrien: Bro u ok?

Nino: Have you seen it...

Adrien: Seen what?

Chloe: Dupain-Cheng finally snapped

Alya: s h u s h Chloe

Sabrina: croissants

Adrien: nevermind...

Kim: huh I forgot how good she is at aiming

Chloe: I'm not wrong she did!

Alya: She didn't snap anymore than I was about to!

Rose: !!!!

Alix: uh...

Juleka: that was awesome

Alix: Kim what?

Chloe: you two are way too similar!

Max: MY EYES!

Sabrina: Y#UBDBHWUIXBUN

Kim: OH! I once convinced Mari to be the pitcher for a baseball game!

Nino: Max? Sabrina? Are you okay?

Chloe: Why did you open the supply closet!

Alya: oh god oh god oh god

Max: Why were you two making out in the supply closet?

Sabrina: We might have exploded Madame Bustier's room...

Adrien: Why were you four at school? It's the weekend!

Lila: I'm more curious about the implication that it was Alya in the closet

Nino: Fridays are when it's me and Alya

Chloe: Saturdays are when Alya and I go on a date

Alya: Sundays are when Chloe and Nino go out

Adrien: and Wednesday is when the three of them go together!

Ivan: When did all three of them start dating?

Mylene: oh in October last year!

Lila: w h a t

Nathaniel: What's wrong Lila?

Lila: I just found a video

Rose: Oh?

Lila: What The Fuck is Marinette Okay????

Marinette: i h a v e a s c e n d e d

Chloe: Oh Shitsticks!

Sabrina: take cover...

Alya: What?

Adrien: What?

Lila: What?

Alix: A little terrifying that they sent that at the same time. But also get down you idiots!

Kim: Yeah! Marinette hasn't slept in a while!

Max: No wonder...

Rose: OH! She's going to forget what happened!

Nino: I got it!

Then there was a link. Marinette was afraid to open the link. After what happened last time she just couldn't sleep well...

Her classmates' reactions were understandable. So she opened the link.

{The video was shakey but otherwise good. In the frame was the obviously horrendous Hawkmoth and Mayura. Weirdly whoever it was hadn't been noticed by either and had somehow gotten into their base of operations.

"Here, hold this," her voice said sounding jarringly tired "I've got a job to do."

"Uh, how did you even get in here? How did I get in here?" the second voice was familiar but not at the same time. The other person took the camera and was apparently better at holding it than her since the shakiness goes away. That's when she stepped into frame.

Past her was wearing just some regular old pajamas and her hair was in a bun. Which uh was not the weirdest thing. No, it was past her holding a tray of croissants and looking angry about it. She picked up one of the croissants and threw it at Mayura then she threw another one at Hawkmoth. Mayura just collapsed once the croissant connected with the back of her head. Hawkmoth on the other hand stumbled forward and then turned around in a rage. Past-Marinette threw croissant at his face. Hawkmoth fell over and at that point, Past-Marinette had marched up to him with the tray(which no longer held croissants) and hit him with the tray.

"YOU BITCHASS OF A BUTTERFLY FUCKER! I DON'T GET ENOUGH SLEEP BECAUSE OF YOU HAVING NO FUCKING SLEEP SCHEDULE, YOU SHITHEAL OF A HUMAN BEING! I'M FUCKING DONE WITH DEALING WITH YOUR SELF PITYING ASS! THERE WILL BE NO MORE AKUMAS ASSHOLE!" Past-Marinette screamed while hitting Hawkmoth over and over again.

"Holy shit! Is she okay?" came quietly from the camera person.

"i t s t i m e f o r y o u t o g o n i g h t n i g h t!" Past-Marinette's voice sounded oddly haunting as she brought the tray down on Hawkmoth one last time. Then she ripped the miraculous off of him and held it up triumphantly.}

The video ended there. In the description, it said that she had also gotten Mayura's and they called the police. Marinette was mildly concerned.

"Tikki did I take down Hawkmoth as a civilian?" Marinette questioned turning to the Kwami.

"Yes, and you brought another civilian with you to record you beating Hawkmoth up with stale croissants" Tikki was done with the world.

Notes:

Hello everybody, I hope you enjoyed reading this! I made this because I had been reading something and got really amused by the idea of Marinette beating Gabriel as a civilian with croissants.