Work Text:
Josuke stared down at the unsolicited box that sat on his desk.
Okuyasu stood behind him, scratching his head. "I wonder who put it there? It's not even valentine's day."
"Yeah…that's why I'm wary," Josuke said slowly.
Okuyasu grinned. "Come on, Josuke, it's probably just a girl, a secret admirer. You know you have lots of them."
Josuke looked around the room and saw a lot of girls casting disparaging looks at the box of chocolates, but none ignoring it completely or blushing when he looked their way.
"Yeah, but most of the time they don't bother with the secret part," Josuke mused. "I don't know, man, it's just weird."
"Well, if you don't want them, I'll eat them!" Okuyasu said eagerly, reaching for the box. "I doubt anyone will ever leave me a box of chocolates."
Josuke snagged the box away from him. "No way, man! Someone could have spit in these for all we know! No one should eat them."
Okuyasu pouted, folding his arms over his chest. "So you're just going to let good chocolate go to waste because you're afraid someone might have spit in them?"
Josuke opened his mouth to reply when an idea popped into his head that he just couldn't find it in himself to ignore. He started to grin.
"What?" Okuyasu demanded.
Josuke chuckled and lowered his voice. "What if we passed them on to Rohan? Then if they're prank chocolates, he'll be the one to deal with it?"
Okuyasu grinned. "Yeah! That would be hilarious! Especially if they were filled with toothpaste or something!"
"And it would make up for when he bought the last of my favorite mini cakes right in front of me at Owson's last week."
Okuyasu chuckled and Josuke tucked the chocolates into his bag for later.
After school they swung by Rohan's house, hoping he wouldn't see them.
Josuke took the chocolates from his bag with a grin. "All right, I'll just run up to the porch and put this in the mail slot or something."
Okuyasu frowned suddenly. "Josuke, are you sure we should do this? I mean, what if there really is something wrong with the chocolates?"
Josuke snorted. "Come on, Okuyasu, there's probably nothing wrong with them at all. Besides, it's Rohan. He deserves it."
Okuyasu shrugged and Josuke snuck up to the porch and slipped the chocolates into the small mail slot by the door before running back to the sidewalk with a grin. The idea that Rohan would unwillingly eat chocolates someone spit on—spit meant for Josuke—really made his day.
"Come on, I've got to stop by the store and pick up a few things for mom before heading home," Josuke told his friend. "Want to come with?"
"Sure," Okuyasu replied as they walked off, the deed done.
~~~~~~~
Rohan held his grocery bag in the crook of one arm as he dug for his keys. He really hadn't wanted to go out today but he was out of both tea and coffee and there was no way he would be able to finish the new script without something to drink.
He finally found the keys in his pocket and went to unlock the door when he saw something sticking out of his mailbox.
Curious, Rohan reached over to pull it out, but instead of a package, it was a box of chocolates.
He snorted. Probably left by a fan. He really wished that snot-nosed brat Hazamada hadn't found his address because he had blabbed it to anyone who would listen and now it was an unlikely day when Rohan could actually work without someone coming to knock on his door for an autograph. Most of the time he just pretended he wasn't home. He'd tried erasing it from the brat's head but somehow he just seemed to find out about it again.
However, he was actually craving something sweet, so this couldn't have come on a better day. He'd certainly enjoy a few of these while he worked.
First order of business was making coffee, though.
Once Rohan had made a cup of coffee and retired to his studio, he started to work on the script for his next chapter of Pink Dark Boy. It was due tomorrow and he'd been stuck on a couple parts, but the walk to the store that day had helped him to figure out where he wanted to take it, so now it should only take him a couple hours to write it all out.
He scribbled a few notes then turned to open the box of chocolates. They smelled delicious, all of them with different fillings. Rohan popped one into his mouth and instantly had to eat another one. Maybe it was just because he was craving chocolate, but these seemed particularly good.
Before he knew it, he was just working on the last scene for this script and he looked over for another chocolate, realizing that more than half of them were gone.
Rohan pursed his lips. He probably shouldn't eat any more, and yet, who was here to tell him no? He took one more—okay, two—and finished up the script, sitting back and feeling satisfied with his progress.
Now he just had to call his editor and let him know that the script would be on the way.
He got up to refill his coffee and grabbed the phone in the kitchen after pouring a fresh cup. As he dialed, a pang in his stomach made him wince and he rubbed his middle ruefully. Okay, maybe he had eaten too many chocolates. He could sometimes get carried away when he was writing. It had been a long time since he'd given himself a stomach ache from sweets though. Really rather childish of him.
When his editor picked up, he leaned back against the counter to talk, watching the steam rise from his cup of coffee as he tried to ignore the increasingly irritable pangs in his stomach. He was really starting to regret his greediness right now.
"I'll have it faxed to you within a few hours," Rohan promised and ended the call. He took his coffee and sipped it, but just a swallow made his stomach feel a little nauseous. Maybe he needed some water instead.
He grabbed a bottle from the fridge and went back up to the studio to start reading over the pages for a quick edit, making a few notes and then, once he was satisfied, he went over to the fax machine.
As he stood however, he felt suddenly dizzy and his stomach protested so much that he had to nearly bend double as a cramp lanced through him. Rohan grunted a curse. Was it too much to ask to be able to enjoy a few chocolates? Okay, he had eaten more than just a few, but still, this was a little ridiculous.
He started faxing the pages when the dizziness and nausea got so strong, Rohan was sure he was going to throw up. He hurriedly clapped a hand over his mouth and rushed to the bathroom, panting. Nothing happened, but a sudden, tearing pain, ripped him in half and he collapsed to his knees with a cry, vomiting into the toilet.
Stomach cramps assaulted him, forcing him to bend double even after he finished vomiting. He curled up on the bathroom floor, breaking out into a cold sweat as he trembled, arms wrapped around his protesting stomach. He whimpered, squeezing his eyes shut. This wasn't normal. Was something wrong with him? Were…were the chocolates poisoned or something? No, that was ridiculous. Why would anyone give him poisoned chocolates?
Rohan got his breath under control and sat up slowly, crawling to the door, deciding he would lie down in bed until this passed. Maybe if he could sleep off his stupid mistake of eating way too many chocolates, he would feel better.
Another agonizing cramp tore through his belly and Rohan cried out, tears of pain springing to his eyes as he doubled over, head pressed against the floor. Medicine…should he take something? What should he take? Actually, should he be calling an ambulance right now? That might actually be a more logical idea.
As he tried to shakily pull himself to his feet to go back downstairs to use the phone, he felt a wave of nausea and dizziness overtake him again along with even more agonizing stomach cramps before his body seemed to simply quit on him.
Rohan's eyes rolled up in his head and he collapsed at the top of the stairs.
~~~~~~~
Josuke and Okuyasu finished with the shopping and were heading back to Josuke's house.
"You want to stay for a while to do homework?" Josuke asked him.
"Yeah, I didn't really understand the lesson," Okuyasu told him sheepishly.
"It's okay, I'll help you out."
"Josuke Higashikata."
Josuke frowned and turned around to see another student standing there, glowering darkly at him.
"Yeah?" he inquired, wondering what this guy wanted.
The other student clenched his fists. "I bet you don't even know who I am, do you? Well, you'll remember now. I know your secret. I know you have a Stand!"
Josuke's stance turned wary, and Okuyasu also tensed beside him. "Oh yeah? How do you know that?"
"Because I have one too!" the guy said smugly. "Which means I'm just as cool as you now."
"Good grief," Josuke muttered under his breath.
"So I guess you didn't fall for the chocolates?" the student asked darkly.
Josuke frowned. "Chocolates?"
Okuyasu made a sound of surprise. "Wait. Josuke, this is your secret admirer?"
The other student clenched his fists and stomped angrily. "No, you idiot! The chocolates were poisoned to give me an advantage! However, now it looks like I'll just have to face you myself. It doesn't matter anyway. When I beat you into a pulp, the girls at school will think I'm the cool one. My Stand—"
"Wait, poisoned chocolates?" Josuke demanded, cutting the guy off and turning to stare, wide-eyed in horror at Okuyasu. "Rohan!"
Okuyasu's eyes widened in understanding and they raced away, pushing past the other student.
"Hey! Wait a minute! Come back and fight me, Higashikata! You're just a coward!"
Josuke ignored him, really, really hoping Rohan hadn't eaten the chocolates.
"Crap, crap, crap," he breathed as they sprinted back toward the mangaka's house. "He's gonna kill me for this. He's actually gonna kill me this time."
They got to the house and Josuke gulped as he saw the chocolates were no longer in the mail slot. He threw the bags of groceries onto the porch and pounded on the door.
"Rohan, hey! It's Josuke and Okuyasu!"
They waited a few seconds but there was no answer. Josuke pounded harder. "Rohan, come on, this is seriously important! I mean it!"
Still no answer.
Josuke bit his lip and brought out Crazy Diamond to break through the door and reassemble it.
"Rohan?" he called. If the mangaka was here, surely he would have come out by now to yell at them.
Okuyasu started looking around, and Josuke went for the stairs.
He found Rohan as soon as he got to the top.
The artist was lying on the top of the stairs, twitching and moaning softly, sweat glistening on his skin.
"Okuyasu!" Josuke shouted to his friend as he leapt up the last few steps and crouched beside Rohan, gripping his shoulder and shaking him. "Rohan! Rohan, come on, wake up!" He slapped the mangaka none-too-gently across the face and Rohan's eyes fluttered, spearing Josuke.
"You…" he croaked. "Damn you, Josuke Higashikata." He then gasped and curled up, arms wrapped around his stomach. "It—It hurts, gah…"
"Hey, Josuke!" Okuyasu shouted as he pounded up the stairs. "Can you heal him?"
"I—I don't think I can do anything about this," Josuke said helplessly as he watched Rohan writhe on the floor, in obvious agony. This was really bad. "Rohan, where are the chocolates?"
The mangaka made a weak gesture to his studio and Okuyasu ran to get them.
"You…did this…" Rohan growled at Josuke.
The teen paled, feeling genuinely awful. "No, it's not like that, Rohan, I promise! I didn't know! I would never have—"
"Josuke, he ate almost all of them!" Okuyasu said as he came back with the box.
Josuke's eyes blew wide. They didn't even know what the kid had used. "Okay, we need to call an ambulance. I don't think Crazy Diamond can do anything about this. Stay with him."
Josuke rushed to the kitchen and grabbed the phone, calling for the ambulance. It was a rush of action after that. He and Okuyasu carried Rohan down to the couch to make him as comfortable as possible before the paramedics arrived, then they all piled into the back of the ambulance, not knowing what else to do.
At the hospital, Josuke paced the waiting room, chewing his fingernails. Why the hell did he think it was a good idea to give the chocolates to Rohan? This was all on him. What if Rohan wouldn't be okay? It would be Josuke's fault. It was so stupid, what had he been thinking? Well, for starters, he never would have expected the chocolates to actually be poisoned. Who did that?!
He and Okuyasu waited in tense silence for what seemed like hours. Then finally a familiar figure turned the corner.
Josuke glanced up, surprised. "J-Jotaro! How did you…?"
"Speedwagon Foundation," Jotaro said tersely, glowering at Josuke as he folded his arms across his chest. "Caught the kid who was going after you. Found him ranting in the street."
"Is Rohan…?" Josuke asked quietly, dreading the answer.
Jotaro glowered at him for a long moment, making Josuke feel even smaller than he usually did around the tall man. "He'll be fine. They were able to pump his stomach to flush out the majority of the poison. Luckily it was plant based instead of an acid."
Josuke felt sick. He wrapped his arms around himself.
"So he'll be okay?" Okuyasu asked quietly.
"He'll make a full recovery but he'll be weak for a few days," Jotaro said, his eyes darkening. "So, you wanna tell me what the hell happened?"
Josuke slumped into a chair and explained the story to Jotaro. The older man was silent the entire time, just glowering at them and when finally Josuke trailed off, looking down at his feet, Jotaro sighed and tugged his hat over his eyes.
"Good grief," he muttered. "Well, it's up to Rohan whether he wants to forgive you. I don't know that I would."
Josuke and Okuyasu hung their heads. "Can…can we see him?" Josuke asked.
Jotaro was silent for a long moment but finally nodded. "If he's awake."
They followed Jotaro through the hospital hallways and to a room. Jotaro knocked on the door before opening it and stepping inside.
"You have visitors."
Josuke and Okuyasu slinked inside and Josuke was shocked to see how bad Rohan looked lying in the bed. He looked almost worse than when Highway Star had stolen his nutrients.
The mangaka's eyes were half open and practically spearing Josuke.
"Hey," the teenager grinned. "Um…glad you're gonna be okay."
Rohan grunted, lip curling.
Josuke sighed, shoulders slumping. "Rohan…look, I'm…I'm really sorry. It was stupid. But I swear I didn't think there was anything wrong with the chocolates."
Rohan continued to glower. "You're an idiot."
Okay, Josuke would take that. "I know you probably hate me even more, but…I really am sorry."
Rohan sighed and rolled his eyes. "Yes. Though I do suppose you also found me, so…I guess we're even."
Josuke blinked and nodded quickly. "Okay, I'll take that."
Rohan speared him again. "But if you ever think of coming near my house again, I will have Heaven's Door give you a very embarrassing tick. And I can be creative."
Josuke laughed nervously. "Copy that. Okay, we'll let you rest now."
He and Okuyasu beat a hasty retreat from the room. Josuke felt a bit of relief flow through him though. Even though Rohan would probably never trust him again, at least he would be okay.
They ran into Koichi on their way back to the waiting room.
"Guys, there you are! I just heard about Rohan-Sensei! What happened?"
Josuke and Okuyasu shared an awkward look.
Yeah…now…they were gonna have to tell Koichi…