Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was dark. All around her all she could really see was the pleasant nothingness that seemed to encase her. It was nice, a sort of freedom that she had never experienced since she was a child. She felt numb to the world, a sort of detachment to what she once was. Her being was encased in a protective obliviousness, without regard on where she was or what she was doing.

She felt nothing, thought nothing, was nothing. It was ecstatic.

The darkness embraced her, it was warm and pure and full of comfort and safety and rest. Away from the pain and the suffering. The fighting and the blood and the feelings.

She could finally rest. 

So, when she felt the barest hints of presence, of knowing, of being, the feeling of identity, she felt cold dread fill her. She didn't know what it meant other than the feeling of wrong wrong please no not again don't make her go out again.

Suddenly, the warmth and darkness is ripped away from her. Instead, the dreaded coldness and blinding light take hold as she finds herself in denial. No, no this can't be happening. She didn't want this, didn't want the light, didn't want its deceitful being as it gave false promises of hope and love and future before it was destroyed by the very presence of reality. She would rather go back to the darkness, the rest, the true place were no lies were said, where no expectations were needed to be met. Where only forgetfulness was present. 

The now baby let out wails of sorrow and anger. She denied the fates of their entertainment, their belief that they could rip her away from the reprieve, from the obliviousness. She wailed and screamed and wished nothing more than rip apart the very being that thought it smart to take her away from the embrace of eternity back to the cycle of fleeting life. She wished for the sweet reprieve from being as the images of blood and death and loneliness took hold as it almost choked her into compliance, rooting itself into her very consciousness as pain filled her heart and sorrow burrowed deep into her chest.

Suddenly, taking her away from the tormenting thoughts that filled her, a twinkle-like voice brought her out of her madness. She heard what sounded like words but could not make sense of them. Opening her eyes more readily, she was surprised to see that she was being held in the arms of a woman. She was saying something...no she was singing. The words were ones she never heard of before as the soft melody made its home inside of her head, pushing away the thoughts of anger and pain and blood as it settled something within her. 

Finding that she had lost her voice, she gazed into kind blue eyes as she gazed at the woman with blonde hair. Looking down, she saw that the woman was wearing a white dress of sorts, her arms skinny yet holding her in a strong but gentle hold as she smiled while continuing her melody. She found that the fight inside of her was gone before it could further manifest as she stared dazedly at the woman in front of her. 

Her brain was still foggy, it was hard for her to truly make out what was happening around her other than the fact that something was wrong. She just didn’t know what. She knew that it wasn’t supposed to be like this, that she wasn’t supposed to be here. That this was not her.

As the voice continued their melody, she felt herself relax further as the manic thoughts that had taken hold over her head were slowly eased, letting her think a little more clearly. She was…Sakura.

That was her name. Sakura.

Sakura was…

Pained filled her head as she whimpered, feeling something deep within her pull at her memories and try and take hold but nothing could be grabbed as it slipped and slipped, almost like sand slipping from too small hands as it trailed down the small gaps until there was nothing left but emptiness.

She felt the pain leave her as the arms around her pressed her small head against the beating chest of the woman holding her. The beating of the heart something that was for some reason nostalgic to her. As if she had heard it from somewhere, but she couldn’t remember from where.

Still, the beating of the heart along with the continued melody caused her to slowly shut her eyes as she found herself not willing to fight against the sudden drowsiness that had taken hold.

A different sort of obliviousness took hold as the darkness once more brought her back to its embrace, only this time she knew that it would not be the forever that was once promised.

At least not for now.

o~O~o

When she woke up again, her thoughts were less erratic as she gazed patiently at the new world around her. She knew more clearly now that she was Sakura, and that Sakura was not supposed to be this small.

Observing where she was stationed at, she made note that it was what looked like a makeshift cradle made of cardboard and slightly scratchy blankets with what looked like a slightly fluffy rag rolled up to act as a sort of pillow for her head.

She could sense that she was placed in a dark room of sorts, and while her senses were not the ones that she was used to, she could still hear the light moans and groans from what she believed to be the room next to her. She had a feeling that was where the woman who had placed her to sleep was currently.

While she categorized all this in her head, she looked more inward, tried to find why exactly she found this whole situation wrong.

She found that she could only just recall the barest of details, though the majority of her head was blank and filled with what looked like a foggy mist. The more she tried to break through, the more the mist seemed to dissolve as it moved away from her probing thoughts, as if having a consciousness itself.

She was…a shinobi…

A shinobi was a protector, was a killer, was a warrior, was an assassin.

A shinobi was a weapon.

She needed to go back, she needed to protect…what? What was she needed for, why was she in such a hurry to go?

Pain echoed inside of her head as flashes of red took hold of her mind, causing all thoughts to cease as she clenched her eyes shut, arms too small and uncoordinated to grip at her head the way she wished she could.

Flashes of grey and blue and black and yellow and pain and love and suffering and betrayal filled her head as she felt tears start to well up her eyes. She tried to breathe but all that came out was a choked sound as her heart started to race.

Flashes of light shone behind her eyes as blue and green took over her thoughts, nudging her forward only to be overtaken by brown and steadiness and stubbornness. Before she would even wish for a respite red once more took hold as the feeling of wet warmth and regret and fear and duty tried to suffocate her.

She didn’t know she was crying out loud until the door opened, the woman walking in a hurry. While being trapped in her head Sakura didn’t notice that the noises had stopped some time ago and there was a period of silence before her own screams filled the world around her.

The same melody entered Sakura’s head as she found herself once more cradled in the skinny yet strong arms of the woman that was a slowly forming constant in this new place. She found that the thoughts that had been slowly choking her were slowly silenced until nothing was left instead of deep-rooted tiredness.

As her fist gripped the woman’s white dress, the same one she had seen when she woke up in this place, Sakura once more heard the slowly beating heart as her head was nestled against the woman’s chest. The melody continued, the woman slowly running a hand through short barely forming hair.

Closing her eyes, Sakura could only think that there was an image just out of her reach. One of a woman with equally blue eyes, but stronger arms, and hair a tinge darker blonde than the one of the woman she was being held by.

She didn’t know where to place the guilt that slowly started building up inside of her. Didn’t want to think about it. Instead, she let it flow away with the melody, being left with stillness in her head as she found herself once more closing her eyes.

The darkness greeted her like an old friend.

o~O~o

She slowly starts to find out that she was strange. Sakura was not Sakura, but Athanasia. She was not a shinobi, she was a normal child living in a dingy little apartment that she must never leave. She was 3 years old, not the 18-year-old that her mind tried to lie her into believing.

Athanasia. That was her name.

Blinking at the darkness around her, sitting with nothing more than the slight light filtering through the cracks of the door from the room outside as she sat alone in the dark closet, Athanasia wondered over the truth of her life.

She was not bothered by the darkness, it felt soothing in a way. She was bemused by her mother’s fretting when she apologized to her over having to place her inside the darkness, one time asking if she had wanted a candle at the very least.

She said no, not only because even as a young barely weened child she knew that candles were an extremely precious commodity that should not be wasted for such fanciful things. But also, for the very fact that she didn’t fear the darkness. Rather she thrived in it, loved how it wrapped around her and made her seem a part of it, as if her very existence was erased.

She at times locked herself in the closet even when she didn’t need to, usually times when her mother had left to her rare errands outside of the small two room apartment they resided in. She would come out only when she sensed the blue light she knew was her mother coming home.

The one time her mother had found that she was hiding in the closet, she had been concerned, asking constantly if Athanasia was okay.

After that day, Athanasia made sure not to outwardly show how much she enjoyed the darkness towards her mother. Instead, she found her reprieve when her mother brought customers to her house, forcing herself to tune out the noises from the outside for something inside of her told her that she should not be privy to what was going on in the other room.

Words such as seduction and…something else that she couldn’t quite place were highlighted in her mind, but she let the knowledge flow, accepting it but not becoming too perturbed by it.

She found that was the best way to react to the weird things that her mind would bring forth, merely to accept them but not look any deeper. If she tried, she found that her head would hurt and flashes of light filled her mind until feelings and thoughts crashed against her mental walls, wishing to be heard but not knowing the best way to make themselves understood.

Those days that only thing that saved her from going mad was her mother’s constant reassurances as she hummed a melody she has grown to rely on, the constant soothing beating of her mother’s heart against her ears. A constant reminder that she was safe.

Hearing the loud slam of the door showing that the guest was finally gone, Athanasia waited as she heard the rustling from the room outside of the closet. A few moments later, the door opened as light flooded in, chasing away the ever-present darkness.

Athanasia had no time to mourn the retreat of the darkness before she was enveloped by a hug, skinny arms tightly holding her against a rapidly beating chest with trembling arms.

Athanasia was used to this, for as much as her mother was a support for her when she was broken by the voices in her head, she knew that she was equally as important for her mother’s own continued will. She hugged her mother just as tightly as she could even with her small arms and snuggled her head against her chest, hearing as the rapidly beating heart started to slow and the trembling arms holding her slowly stilled.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. You will survive, you will be more. You will not fall too.” She didn’t understand her mother’s words, so she just smiled and nodded at her words as she let her mother continue to hold her.

She knew they were the only things keeping the other sane in this cruel world.

o~O~o

The thoughts were coming more constantly than before, they continued to build and build as Athanasia grew and grew. She understood more, knew more. She did not welcome this knowledge though, for with it the thoughts of red and pain and sorrow and regret were creeping ever closer to consciousness.

She didn’t know what would happen if those thoughts joined the others, but something told her it would not be good.

So while she accepted the knowledge, she did so warily. Well, it wasn’t like she could block it really, they merely formed, as if they had been there from the beginning but she had been too blind to see.

She still acted like a child to her mother though, the knowledge telling her that letting her mother know that she was other was not the safest of choices. She didn’t want to cause the woman pain either, both had suffered enough for this knowledge to in some way impact their relationship.

She didn’t think she could survive her mother’s abandonment. Not when the nightmares continued their chase and her thoughts tinted red at times. Not when the light still scared her, and the darkness could only offer a moment’s respite.

So, she continued to act, voices telling her that she was used to acting. Used to being pliant. Used to the masks as she hid the knowing and the age behind eyes of naivety she wished she actually had.

She laughed and sang her mother’s melody as she continued to nuzzle her head against her mother’s chest, placing her ears against her chest as the ever present beating of a heart put her at ease.

She continued to smile even as the memories continued building and building.

o~O~o

“Athanasia means immortality, eternal life, everlasting. You shall survive Athanasia. You will go on.” She merely smiled, nodding along with her mother as she claimed that her name was really pretty.

Once inside her closet, the darkness once more keeping her in its embrace, she laughed inside her own head as the voices continued to whisper, this time louder as she laughed and laughed within the walls of her mind.

She had been branded with the name of eternity, with the name of everlasting. Flashes once more filled her head as she saw blue and yellow as pain and longing etched itself within her soul. She heard the whispers of love and bonding and hope as she grasped at the lights, only to find them disappearing once more within the mist.

Athanasia smiled bitterly as pain filled her senses, as blood and sorrow once more filled her thoughts and images of death and wandering and hopelessness and brokenness filled her mind.

She smiled still, eyes unseeing as she lightly hummed the melody her mother had always sung her, quiet enough that it was only privy to herself and the darkness.

She was everlasting.

Her mind continued to laugh.

o~O~o

She remembered a circle. A white circle. She knew that it was important to her. The white circle marked her somehow, with no ending and no beginning. She saw the white circle against a red background, and she smiled.

Her mother brushed her hair with her fingers, she was five and her hair had reached her lower back by now. Her mother denied the thought of cutting it, instead cooing at the hair and continuing to brush her fingers through the hair, untangling it slowly and carefully as to not cause her treasure pain.

Athanasia let her mother continue her ministrations, enjoying the thin fingers carding through her hair and almost purring as she scratched at her scalp here and there. She had her eyes closed as she hummed the melody ingrained inside of her by her mother.

She pushed back the vision of another woman brushing her hair, though instead of fingers she used a brush. She pushed and pushed because the thoughts will not taint this. They will not take away from her mother.

She pushed and pushed, instead letting herself enjoy the attention of her mother as the woman whispered words of love and devotion towards her.

She felt warmth fill her as her mother's proclamation of “beautiful” seemed to mark her very being.

She almost believed it.

o~O~o

Athanasia glared at her hair, gripping it as she wished to do nothing more than yank it out of her scalp. She would rather have her mother’s own blonde hair. The pink looked jarring, looked other. Her mother had said her hair was unique, but when Athanasia asked her if anyone else had the same color, she had been silent.

That was answer enough.

Something inside of her told her this was a constant for her. She didn’t like that thought. Though to be fair, she didn’t like most thoughts of otherness that filled her from time to time.

Still, she glared at her pink pink pink hair and pouted. She had asked her mother if she could go with her to her errands, now a full 7 years old, she knew she was old enough to go along.

Her mother had shut the idea down, and before Athanasia could ask why, she noticed her mother’s concerned gaze towards her hair. The same hair she had called beautiful.

The hair that once again marked her as wrong.

Athanasia pouted but agreed to her mother’s silent pleads as she allowed the woman to leave, to leave her behind once more with only the silence in the outside and the voices hidden within.

She grumbled but opened the door to the closet and walked inside.

o~O~o

She was used to the thoughts by now, the voices that called to her here and there as they showed her things that she knew she shouldn’t know but was too weak to look away from. She continued to play with the blue light that she could now form within her hands, playful in its whisp-like nature as it formed like flames in her hands.

She continued to be silent about the lights and the voices and the knowing, keeping it tightly hidden away from her mother. She continued to just be in this world as an other while she played the part of a daughter to a woman who had given her everything.

She played and played and forgot the otherness, at least for the most part as she continued to live in the world as Athanasia. As her mother’s daughter. As everlasting.

She didn’t get to play the part for much longer.

She saw as her mother’s light, blue but small, smaller than she knew it should be, flared up in fear. Saw as the other blue light, the one that was a customer, also flared, just as small but still showing anger and what she could just barely tell was greed.

Then the scream came, and Athanasia felt dread fill her as the voices for once became silent while she stood up in a hurry, grabbing hold of the door and not noticing the creaking of the wood as she slammed the door of the closet open.

The beating of her heart picked up faster and faster as the silence inside her head continued on, the longest it had ever been silent. Athanasia hoped and hoped and almost prayed as she ran into the room.

She stopped dead in her tracks, her mother gasping and looking towards her in pain but most of all in worry as her blue eyes begged her to run, to leave. Her chest was red red red as a knife was sheathed into her body.

Athanasia saw the world through glass eyes as the voices came back, this time louder and the lights were brighter as she saw and heard and understood. Something inside of her cracked as she felt the voices become one.

Kill him.

Sakura needed no other thought as the man now looked at her, eyes wide before glazing over with further greed and lust. He said something, a sickening smile on his face, but Sakura didn’t care to listen to the words of a dead man as a green light burst from her hand, the chakra answering her call as easily as before.

The man gave a startled scream, eyes showing fear now as he stared at the child with what looked like green glowing hands in terror. The words “monster” barely managed to escape his lips before Sakura appeared before him, eyes uncaring as she touched the man without hesitation.

Screams broke as the man withered and screamed and begged and cried. Pain unlike any other filling him as his bones and organs seemed to almost liquify. Sakura said nothing, looking on with a detached sort of vengeance as she removed her hand from the man’s arm, causing him to collapse to his knees as he choked from the blood now spilling from his lips.

She said nothing still as her arm was now covered by bright blue chakra. She said nothing as she pulled her arm back before plunging it deep within the man’s chest, blue chakra keeping her arm strong and protecting it from damage as she heard the man choke further, more blood spilling to the floor as she used her other hand to bring his head up.

She looked dispassionately as the light faded from his eyes, the frightened look on his face forever cemented on his corpse.

Sakura pulled her arm away as she walked towards the woman who was miraculously still alive, if only just barely. Green hands now placed on her new mother’s form; Sakura knew what she would find. The knife had pierced the woman’s lungs, with how malnourished she was and with what little natural charka her reserves had, the chance of healing was minimal.

She would still try, even if it took every drop of chakra she had left.

As if sensing in some way what Sakura was about to try and do, the woman managed to find the strength to grab hold of Sakura’s hand. She smiled, blue eyes still showing pain, but it was slightly overshadowed by pure and utter love within.

Sakura found herself pushed back as Athanasia took hold once more and cried, cradling her mother’s arms. “…live…”

Her mother just barely managed to choke out, smile ever present, before the light soon also left her own eyes as her hand went slack in Athanasia’s hold, slowly cooling.

Athanasia couldn’t help but laugh and laugh as she placed her head against her mother’s chest, uncaring of the blood that would surely mark her.

She placed her head against her mother’s chest as she had done so many times before, but no longer was she met with the constant heartbeat. She was met only with silence.

She laughed again as tears continued to steam down her eyes before the laughter was taken over by cries of pain as she screamed against the body of her one true constant in this new life.

She screamed and felt herself fully shatter.

Sakura was left behind. Everlasting.

Chapter Text

Darkness surrounded her as Sakura made her way down the alleyway, making sure to stay hidden from anyone and everyone in her vicinity, especially as most people around at this time and in this place would be ones she would rather not make contact with. At least not if she wanted to get home quickly.

She pulled the hood of her dark cloak down further, obscuring her eyes. It would do her no favors if her hair was seen by anyone, one too many times having to escape a trafficking event taught her that hard earned lesson.

Thoughts of her hair brought back memories of a grief-stricken child who only wanted to follow her mother out to the market, a glum expression in her face as she sulked about how strange her hair was. Trying to brush those thoughts away before they managed to take over, she stubbornly continued walking. As if feeling from said memories.

She was just about to make her way home, back to the apartment where everything started and where it all ended. She had thought of leaving, of finding a hole in the wall somewhere else and using it for storage and sleep.

Then bright images of laughter, of happiness and fingers caressing pink locks as humming filled the room took over. Sometimes, no matter how much something seems to shatter, its still hard to throw it away, all you can really do in the end is try and preserve the pieces left. No matter how fruitless it all seems in the end.

Still Sakura picked the shattered pieces one by one, even as their sharp edges pierced into her skin and made her bleed onto the cold ground. She continued to pick them up until she took hold of all the ones she could grab and held them close, even as they stabbed into her very being causing pain and torment. Even then Sakura continued to stubbornly hold on to them.

Just as Sakura was turning a corner, lost in her thoughts as was usual for her, she heard a commotion up ahead. Usually, she would not care to investigate as fighting was a constant in these parts, but she was rather tired and this was the fastest and least troubling route to her place of residence. Hence, she sighed through her nose as she sneakily looked down the corner, previewing what was going on.

It looked to be three men ganging up on a smaller person, fist at the ready as the younger man was holding what looked like a small knife. Well to call him a man would be a bit off, as the person in question looked more like a kid than anything else. Sakura stubbornly didn’t think over how old she herself currently was in this body, such thoughts were best left unattended.

A loud yell took her out of her inner musing, Sakura was surprised to see the young boy holding his own against two adult men, though from the slight faltering in his footwork and the blood seeming to drip from his face, she knew he wouldn’t hold out for much longer. She was tempted to continue down the corner while the men where preoccupied with the boy and continue her way home, but something seemed to stop her from doing so.

She looked at the still fighting boy, gaze filled with determination and anger as the grip of his knife seemed to only tightened. Even as a man slammed his large fist against him bringing his smaller body down, he stilled got back up again, just as stubborn.

Black seemed to turn blonde as whisker like lines seemed to almost manifest on the boy’s face. Sakura felt a longing grip at her heart as her eyes burned and her chest tightened with yearning. Biting her lips against the onslaught of emotion that momentarily overtook her, she just barely managed to reign back her bearings as another man managed to land a kick on the boy, this time taking him longer to get back up.  

Seeing the bright black eyes, for some reason causing further longing and pain to fill her mind as blonde and black and stubbornness and fortitude screamed into her head, the need to protect no not again they will not be hurt again not while she is here.

Sakura didn’t notice she was moving until she slammed a fist against the man that had taken out a knife, seeming to be ready to finish the boy off. She managed to keep the chakra in her fist low, keeping it from shining too brightly from the energy as the man slammed against the wall in a way that was almost inhuman. She didn’t care to check if he was still alive or not from the superhuman hit as Sakura swiped up the knife he had dropped, throwing it between the eyes of another man who had been standing there, seeming to be in shock from the event.

The man barely had time to let out a shocked release of breath before he was down, death claiming him without notice.

The last man stayed paralyzed, his brain trying to make sense of what was happening around him. Just as Sakura was about to finish him off as well, she was beat by the boy who she had thought was out for the count. He had silently stood back up and, knife raised with purpose, stabbed the last man straight through the throat.

The man chocked, eyes wide and filled with fear as he struggled against the knife in his throat, trying to pull it out in a useless effort to sustain his life before he finally fell down, dead upon impact.

Looking around, Sakura saw two more bodies a little way away, from the looks of it they were also part of the group. Gazing at the young boy who was slumped against himself, cradling his stomach in pain, she wouldn’t be surprised if he was the reason behind the two other dead. For someone who looked so young, looking just barely a few years older than her current age, he was surprisingly strong.

The young boy looked up at her, unbelievably dark bright black eyes penetrating into her own green ones as he gazed at her in scrutiny for a time before bowing his head down slightly. “Thank you for helping me.” His voice was neither arrogant nor servile, he seemed to understand when to thank others but didn’t go out of his way to fawn over those who were stronger.

Just as Sakura was trying to articulate how to respond, she was startled by his stumbling, unthinkingly grabbing his still swaying form.

“You look in bad shape, do you have anywhere to stay?” Sakura asked in worry, thankful over the fact that the boy didn’t try and escape her grasp, though something told her that it had more to do with his lack of strength rather than him consciously accepting her help.

Pain seemed to flash from his dark eyes, pain and loss that caused something to break within her. It was the same gaze that looked back at her whenever she stared at a reflective surface. It was the gaze of someone left alone in the world, without anyone left to take away the burden of loneliness and give back a piece of sanity in this corrupt world.

Sakura gazed at the boy in front of her and saw the same young girl who had just lost her mother, who was left in a bright world she never wanted to be a part of with only the whisperings of the dead to keep her company. She gazed at him and saw flashes of colors, blue and yellow and pink and suddenly she didn’t want to let go.

“You can come with me.” She suddenly said, words stumbling out in a hurried sort of way as if she was scared that the boy would disappear before she could utter the words out loud. Black orbs starerd back at her in confusion and caution as the boy seemed to tense in her hold, as if getting ready to pull away.

Sakura felt fear fill her at the thought of him leaving, and she couldn’t help but slightly tighten her grip, causing the boy to flinch and her to quickly loosen her hold. “Sorry.” She muttered, thinking quickly as she came up with an excuse as to why the boy should follow her.

Looking at his hurt form, Sakura knew this was a gamble, but something told her she would regret it if she let him leave now. Faltering slightly, Sakura shook her head and steeled her resolve as she looked down at his slightly crooked fingers. It looked like he either punched the wrong way or punched something too hard.

Breathing out, just as the boy seemed to ready himself to say something to dispel the silence, Sakura let warmth take over her hands as energy filled her left hand, which she placed over the hurt hand of the boy. The boy tensed under her, struggling to flee from her grip at the sight of the light, but Sakura’s strong hold stopped him as she let the energy leave her and fill the boy’s fingers.

The boy’s struggle faltered as the healing slowly took place, his crooked fingers glowing a bright green before they slowly straightened out. She was thankful that it seemed more like fractures rather than actual broken bones, something telling her she wouldn’t be able to heal broken bones as easily just yet.

“I can heal you, though right now it might take me a while as it uses quite a bit of energy”. She wasn’t lying about that, as the energy she had access to was limited, even now she knew she wouldn’t be able to do more without collapsing from exhaustion. Thought she couldn’t deny the other reason for her reasoning was that she wanted to boy to stay with her a little longer. The colors continued to flash around him bringing her comfort, as if a piece of a puzzle was just about to be placed down which fit just right.

The boy seemed to think for a second, his eyes staring into her own even while hidden with the shadow of her hood. They stood there for a few moments, still and silent as they seemed to judge the other with just their gazes.

Finally, the boy seemed to make a decision as he reached out his newly healed hand. “My name is Levi, Levi Ackerman.”

She couldn’t help but brighten slightly, something inside of her feeling like it was swelling up for the first time in years. She hesitated, unsure of what to say, before resolve took over her form and she too reached out and grabbed hold of Levi’s hand.

“Sakura, my name is Sakura.”

Her old name flowed naturally from her lips, as if said a million times before as she shed the mask she was forced to don ever since waking up in this world, finally showing her true self. She would not allow the world to take away from her more than it already had. With the sacrifice of her mother Sakura had once more been fully reborn, rising from the ashes of death and destruction as she took her place in this new world.

“I’ll be in your care, Sakura”. Hearing her true name being uttered by someone of this world for the first time, even with the accent slightly mangling her name, it felt like something within her started to burn as she smiled at the boy. At Levi. At the first person who acknowledged her existence.

The first person who saw her as here and not other.

“Same here, Levi.”

It felt like coming home.

~O.o.O~

Taking Levi to her home was both the easiest and the hardest thing that she had ever done. Once inside, she had taken off her cloak, revealing her visage to her guest. She was met with a startled gaze, his mouth slightly open in shock. His eyes went from her hair to her eyes to her thin stature before he snapped his mouth close.

Seeming to try and push any unnecessary thoughts or questions aside, Levi merely took a seat in the new cot Sakura had managed to steal from an oblivious merchant. That had been the first thing she had gotten rid of after her mother’s passing, not wanting a reminder of the reason as to why her mother had ended up dead.

This cot, though, was not the one she used. It was just a sort of reminder of the woman she came to cherish and who had cherished her in return. It stung a bit to see Levi taking the place that once belonged to her mother, but it also felt freeing. As if him naturally seating there had cauterized some of the wound her mother’s passing had left behind.

“You can sleep there while your wounds heal.” Sakura said offhandedly, placing the cloak on a large nail sticking out of the wall next to the door before making her way over to Levi, hand glowing a duller green color as she examined his wounds.

The young boy seemed to flinch slightly from the otherworldly light, but determination soon steeled his gaze as he forced himself to be still. Sakura was inwardly impressed by his adaptability as she proceeded to scan him using her medical chakra in a way her distant memories told her to.

A fractured rib, though thankfully distal from his lung and hence didn’t manage to piece it. A lot of bruising throughout his body with some internal bleeding towards his stomach. A slightly twisted ankle and a bit of head trauma though thankfully it didn’t seem critical.

After categorizing his wounds from least to most urgent, Sakura let her chakra die out as she stared at Levi’s nervous face. He was a bit too tense, most likely still not comfortable with the strange light coming from her hand. It made sense though, during the two years that Sakura had ventured outside her little home now that her mother was dead and couldn’t stop her, she had found that no one seemed to even know about the powers she had, much less finding someone who also possessed them.

The whispers had told her to stay hidden, to steal only when nobody was looking, to be one with the shadows. A part of her knew that if her talents were known, she would not be safe. Even with her seemingly unique skills, Sakura was limited in terms of power and stamina, her energy far too small to be effective against a big enough group.

Still, for some reason she had decided to disregard the need for obscurity for this boy in front of her. Even the whispers in her head had not tried to dissuade her from trying to help him.

She couldn’t help but stare at him, trying to make sense of why he was different.

Suddenly images of a stubborn back, of a whiskered face full of determination even while blood dripped from his forehead. Of emotionless yet still unbelievably bright black eyes, of obsidian hair flowing in the wind as dark eyes filled with understanding gaze back at her. Of loneliness and grief that seemed to reflect against her own eyes.

Pain throbbed at her mind as the memories stopped abruptly, as if snipping the trail of through before it could fully form as Sakura flinched back from the sudden assault of emotion and images.

“Are you okay?” She heard the slightly deep voice of the boy in front of her, Levi. Shaking her head, Sakura tried to smile slightly as she turned her gaze away.

“Yes, it seems I just used more energy than I should have. I’m heading off to bed now.”

Just as Levi seemed to be getting ready to stand up, most likely believing this cot was her sleeping space, Sakura pushed him back in a lying position. “Like I said earlier, you will be resting here.”

Just as he looked ready to deny her, Sakura gave him a tight smile. “I sleep in the room over there; this is just an extra cot I have laying around.” This was a lie and the truth all in one. Sakura had started sleeping in the closet after one too many nights where the voices would get too loud and the bright red kept trying to drown her whenever she slept in the cot that her and her mother once slept in.

The closet had kept most nights quiet in the long run, even though sometimes the memories still managed to sneak into her consciousness and took control of her dreams certain nights. At least in this case it was the whispers of the unknown dead rather than the dead who she could barely live without.

Still looking a bit put off by him laying there, Levi saw her stern gaze and finally seemed to agree, letting himself relax against the cot.

Sakura smiled, something she was starting to do more and more while around this boy and got up, making her way to her room. “Have a good night, Levi.” She shut the door before he could respond, but Sakura could still make out a mumbled reply in response.

Covered in the darkness she so loved; Sakura let herself fall into oblivion as she had done many other times before as rest finally took over.

For the first time since the day she had emerged from shattered pieces, Sakura didn’t hope the darkness would once more take her away.

~O.o.O~

Living with another person after years of being alone was strange yet therapeutic for Sakura. Levi was nothing like her mother, who loved to hum early in the morning while she cooked them a small breakfast to stave off hunger until the evening.

He wasn’t the type to engage in idle chatter or to tell nonsensical stories randomly as if they just came to mind out of nowhere. Something her mother had done in an effort to distract her after a night filled with tremors and screams.

He was much like Sakura in a way, seeming to try and fit into the darkness and make himself invisible to the rest of the world.

It seemed to be harder for him to do so though, as Sakura could see that he had a strong aura around him. The type of energy that gave off leadership and attention. The type of aura that made one want to follow his lead and listen to every word he said no matter how irrelevant.

In that aura Sakura saw traces of yellow.

Still Sakura made do with the new guest, taking to stealing a little more meat and fruit from the merchants to make a nutritious meal, though she didn’t think of the fact that this would be the first time cooking in this world. Even her memories didn’t bring forth many thoughts over cooking as they tended to do with other tasks she had partaken (usually when it came to sneaking and fighting).

The first time she cooked for her and Levi (other times she had mainly just eaten bread with some ham or fruits) Sakura found that she didn’t really have a knack for it. The gaze Levi had given her was one filled with such disbelief and horror that Sakura couldn’t help but laugh. This had startled Levi, as even when she smiled easily, she had never shown such jovial emotions before.

In his deadpanned gaze (though having softened in the edges) as he stood up and proceeded to make them breakfast instead, Sakura couldn’t help the tinted blue that seemed to overlay his being.

It was decided there and then Levi would be in charge of cooking while Sakura was in charge of procuring the material.

Three months later, as Sakura came back after having gone to steal some bandages and pain killers from the merchants who usually traded more with the military police that patrolled the area, Sakura was met with the unseeing gaze of Levi as he stared at nothing. He looked almost despondent, seeming to have no life in his eyes as he continued to gaze at nothing.

His form sitting up in the cot looked incredibly lonely. As if nothing in the world was holding him down, creating an illusion that he would drift away at any moment.

In his sorrowful form, she could see the pink that seemed to swirl around him.

Sakura sat down next to him, startling him slightly as he gazes down at her. Saying nothing, Sakura just opened one of the bottles holding the pain killers. She lifted the pills to him, Levi grabbing them readily and taking them without the past cautiousness that had surrounded him when they first met.

Feeling something within her seeming to grow slightly from the display, Sakura felt a burning sensation behind her eyes as she slowly placed her head against his shoulder.

Levi seemed to tense from the action, but soon he relaxed into the contact as he leaned further into her.

That night, as Sakura trembled and screamed from terror and pain without knowing, she was awakened by something suddenly moving next to her. This startled her awake, causing her to quickly turn towards the new presence next to her.

Just as she was wondering why exactly her senses had not warned her about this new presence as they had done many times before at other times, she was met with the sight of Levi slowly laying down next to her, mindful of his wounds. While some time had passed and the worst of his wounds were already taken care of, some of his bruising was still there causing some pain.

Sakura couldn’t help but stare at him wide eyed as he fully laid down next to her in the small closet. He said nothing, in the darkness she could just barely make out him raising his arm, as if inviting her.

Without allowing herself to overthink it, Sakura allowed herself to push into Levi’s embrace as she burrowed her face against his chest, making sure to be careful of where he was still bruised. She heard the slightly fast beating of a heartbeat under her ears and couldn’t help the tears that started flowing from her eyes.

Levi didn’t comment on her now shaking form as silent sobs racked her, he merely allowed her to cry into him until, finally exhausted of her tears, Sakura fully relaxed into his form as sleep soon overtook her. For the first time since coming into this world, her head was not filled with whispers and screams at night.

For the first time everything was peaceful.

With this Sakura knew, she found someone to keep her anchored against this ruthless reality.