Work Text:
Kenma: so you weren't going to ever tell me that my
boyfriend was a fucking wizard????
Akaashi: warlock*
Kenma: SERIOUSLY KEIJI?!????!!
Akaashi: first of all, I save your ass all the time
Akaashi: so don't give me that attitude
Kenma: hOW ARE YOU ACTING LIKE
NOTHING IS GOING ON???
Akaashi: one time a baseball was flying right towards you
Akaashi: I stopped it from hitting you
Kenma: wait I remember that
Kenma: I thought you caught that??
Akaashi: I did
Akaashi: with magic
Kenma: oh,,
Akaashi: another time you stayed up late
gaming and didn't study for our calc test
Akaashi: you were definitely going to fail
Akaashi: but suddenly all the answers came to you, right?
Kenma: i...
Kenma: yes
Akaashi: and our 8am lecture
Kenma: what about our 8am lecture??
Kenma: wait
Akaashi: exactly
Akaashi: the coffee I get you every morning
is definitely NOT coffee
Kenma: what the hell is it??
Akaashi: if I tell you, you'll stop drinking it
Kenma: KEIJI?????
Akaashi: and also the time you had glitter
in your hair for two fucking days and getting it all over my dorm
Akaashi: also not shampoo
Kenma: what about the conditioner??
Akaashi: oh yeah, that's my favorite conditioner.
it's actually conditioner
Kenma: so all this time you've been,, helping me
Kenma: with magic
Akaashi: with magic
Kenma: because you're a..
Akaashi: warlock
Kenma: a warlock
Akaashi: AND THERE WAS YOUR SWITCH
that was so draining
Kenma: wait I thought you got me a new switch
when it broke
Akaashi: when you dropped it off of a fucking rooftop*
Kenma: small details
Akaashi: no I did not spend $300 to get you a new one, kenma
Akaashi: I just... restored it to its original state
Akaashi: it was a lot of work
Kenma: okay, okay
Kenma: you've proven your point
Kenma: but Keiji, we've been dating for a while
Kenma: and friends for even longer
Kenma: why couldn't you tell me??
Akaashi: how the hell was I supposed to
tell you that I'm a warlock???
Kenma: WELL YOU SEEM SO CASUAL ABOUT IT NOW
Akaashi: WELL I HAVE NO CHOICE BECAUSE
YOU KNOW NOW
Kenma: yeah because I caught you floating
in your sleep????
Akaashi: sorry if I scared you, kenma, really
Akaashi: I've never heard you scream like that
Kenma: you've never heard me scream at all??
Akaashi: lie again
Kenma: anyways
Akaashi: it's a bad habit I have, I've done it since I was a child
Akaashi: for whatever reason, I never have
nightmares when I sleep that way
Akaashi: I had a lot anxiety last night
Akaashi: and you were busy
Akaashi: so it seemed like a good idea
Kenma: Keiji..
Kenma: baby, I'm sorry
Kenma: I knew something wasn't right so that's why I came over so early
Kenma: to make sure you were alright
Kenma: I shouldn't have waited until the last minutes to write my paper
Akaashi: no it's okay
Akaashi: I didn't have any nightmares
Akaashi: you came to check on me?
Kenma: yes
Kenma: I was worried
Kenma: you never go to bed early
Akaashi: the shade was unnecessary
Kenma: but deserved
Kenma: you really do a lot to help me, keiji
Kenma: I know this whole situation is kinda,, weird
Kenma: but I appreciate you so much
Kenma: I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel about all of this
Kenma: but
Kenma: you're my boyfriend
Kenma: and I've always loved you
Kenma: and this isn't gonna change that
Kenma: actually it's kinda hot
Akaashi: hot?
Akaashi: me doing magic is hot?
Kenma: yes
Kenma: do a card trick for me baby
Akaashi: I hate you
Akaashi: I could put a curse on you
right now if I wanted to
Kenma: you're adorable when you're mad
Kenma: come on baby, pull a rabbit out of a hat
Akaashi: go to hell
Kenma: Keiji
Akaashi: what
Kenma: I love you
Akaashi: I love you too
Akaashi: asshole
Kenma: I'm sorry I wasn't there for you last night
Kenma: but I'm sort of happy that I know now
Kenma: that you're.. a warlock
Kenma: seriously it's kinda cool
Kenma: can I come back over?
Akaashi: you're not freaked out more than this?
Akaashi: I would assume most people would need a few days
Akaashi: or months
Akaashi: maybe even years
Akaashi: but it's only been like an hour kenma
Akaashi: and you're okay?
Kenma: I mean
Kenma: I'm not saying I knew
Kenma: because I didn't
Kenma: but Keiji you're so,, ethereal
Akaashi: simp
Kenma: fuck you
Kenma: anyways I'm done being nice to you
Kenma: show me something cool when I get there
or I'm breaking up with you
Akaashi: I actually have something I've always wanted to show you
Akaashi: but couldn't for obvious reasons
Kenma: what is it?
Akaashi: you'll just have to get here and see kozume
Akaashi: run, don't walk
Kenma: I'm running keiji
Kenma: my sexy warlock
Akaashi: I'm not opening the door when you get here
Kenma: fair