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Beefcake Sensei: The Model Anbu

Summary:

Tsunade decides to capitalize on Iruka's popularity to help bring some much needed good press to the ANBU. She doesn't realize until it's much too late that by putting our beefy, thicck sweetie in the lime-light, she also put him in a lot of danger. Will his obsessive fan Club be OK that he and Kakashi are starting to get more serious? probably not. Whatever will they do about it?!

Notes:

I must make a note to thank and credit llsilvertail for the original plot idea and TurntechToddhead for some subsequent great ideas. Also acknowledge discussions in the Umino Hours Discord for the inspiration! They really brought it with the original idea.... but I went to... other places with it haha. Sorry not sorry?
It became very long so I broke it up into some semblance of "chapters". I just wanted to help break it up a little bit for the readers, but I didn't write it with the intension of chapters... so take it for what it is haha.
I hope y'all like it. I am not sure the style fits as well into the Beefcake series, but it is supposed to be directly following The Challenge and the Reward which is part 2 of the Beefcake series. That makes this the new part 3. I'm trying to keep things chronological, but to be honest, I have no clue where this would all fall in canon hahaha... whoops? We have fun don't we?
If you haven't read that and don't want to (pout) then the only thing you need to know is that Iruka is ripped, he was coerced into a body building competition, and he won. Also he got Kakashi to ask him on a date after... Oh Iruka...

NOTES: It's important for some details that you have seen all the anime. If not I will fill those details in here:
-Ayame and Teuchi (the ramen ppl) has seen under Kakashi's mask while he was eating
-Iruka has a Sonar-like ability to "see" sounds. Well, it isn't described how he does the thing, but it seemed from the show like he was seeing sound vibrations so I'm going with that
-I always thought that the light barrier was impenetrable from both sides, but in a filler Naruto breaks Iruka's trap on Mizuki and attacks him. I'm going to pretend that didn't happen and the barriers are impenetrable from both sides... more sorry not sorrys
-In fillers, ANBU aren't really all that secret... like good friends seem to tell one another about it, so I'm going with the assumption that ANBU secrecy is like... wildly inconsistent and some people are more closeted than others?
-In the anime it is revealed that Gai asked Hiruzen personally to kick Kakashi out of ANBU. He asked to be added to ANBU first, and when Hiruzen said Gai wasn't suited for the post, he argued that neither was Kakashi. So along with noticing Kakashi being more and more distant and recalling the late Fourth's desire to release Kakashi, Hiruzen finally lets him out of the ANBU... Soo... in here, Kakashi knows that Gai got him out!

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters and I make no money from this. Parody is free and fun!
warnings: There is mention of extreme dieting. Iruka isn't happy about it, and it is not recommended!! But it is Anko, and she is evil to poor Iruka!

Chapter 1: The Mission

Chapter Text

“Iruka-sensei, I have called you in here for a very important mission, the details of which are to remain in this room.”

Iruka’s heart beat just a little faster at the commanding voice Tsunade directed at him. Only ANBU and S-rank missions were handed out personally by the Hokage. Iruka was neither ANBU nor qualified for S-ranks as a chuunin.

“Yes, Hokage-sama.” He bowed his head slightly to her. She smiled, charmed as everyone else in the village was by Iruka.

“After your stunt with the body-building competition, you have become a bit famous in the community.” Iruka blushed at being reminded of his victory at the event. It was over two weeks ago, and he still got stopped on the street occasionally. Rumor had it that many who missed the event were miffed and asking for a repeat.

“As you know,” Tsunade continued, “ANBU has a little bit of an image problem right now.”

Iruka nodded. He had heard the rumors spreading throughout the village and in the mission room. An ANBU had gone rogue recently and injured their partner in a domestic dispute. It was handled swiftly, and the civilian partner was quickly healed and put in therapy, but the damage was done for the public image.

Being ANBU was tough, and breaks happened. Tsunade used the public outrage to convince the council to allow her to implement mandatory therapy sessions and mental check-ups for all the active members. They had to place quite a few on mental health leave, but it was for the best. It did leave Konoha a little vulnerable at the moment, but better worrying about external threats than having to worry about threats from within.

Now, she had a problem. How to increase the public opinion of ANBU again? This is where Iruka came in.

“So, we need to do a public image re-branding campaign.” Iruka looked confused at Tsunade. She ignored his look and handed him the mission scroll.

He took the scroll and opened it, reading the details while standing in front of the Hokage’s desk.

“You… you want me to… model?” Iruka asked, head cocked to the side, confused and adorable. Tsunade knew she picked the right ninja.

“We need to increase the public trust in the ANBU again. We firmly believe that with you representing the ANBU on the recruitment posters we will be posting will help immensely.”

“But… forgive me Tsunade-sama, but… you don’t really need to recruit ANBU. You select them and they agree?”

“I’m not so cruel as to make someone join the group if they don’t think they can handle it, Iruka-sensei.” Tsunade’s tone left no room for argument. Iruka nodded, that made sense, but he wasn’t sure the ninja she asked knew that. “Anyway, we also want ninja to aspire to be ANBU, right? How will we know anyone is good enough if they don’t work hard enough to get to ANBU level to begin with? The members are not all just natural geniuses, Iruka-sensei.”

Tsunade gave Iruka a sharp look. He knew why. The Sandaime had constantly told Iruka he could train and become Jounin or ANBU rank if he wanted. He chose his path though and didn’t regret it one bit. Those pipsqueaks he teaches are his life.

“I understand, Tsunade-sama.” Iruka did, really, but it was just unusual to try and advertise the secret group, so he was just a little off put by the idea. “I guess I just don’t understand why me?”

Tsunade scoffed, “Iruka, you are possibly the most popular ninja in the village right now.” Iruka looked shocked at the news. Tsunade didn’t really have time to stroke the man’s ego or convince the chronic self-deprecator he was popular.

“Your presence on the posters will convince the civilians and other ninja that you endorse the ANBU still and they will put a friendly face behind the masks they see. We need the increase in public image right now, and you are obviously not in ANBU so there is no risk of exposing the identities of the current members. This is a mission, Iruka.” She knew throwing in that he would be protecting other ninja would get Iruka to stop questioning the decision.

Iruka straightened-up at the commanding tone. Tsunade was a very powerful presence when she wanted to be. Iruka felt he would follow her into any battle. It was a good trait for a leader. Strong and confident, yet not cocky and foolhardy.

“Yes, Hokage-sama.” He bowed and made to exit. The scroll contained all the details he would need to fulfill the mission.

As he reached the door, Tsunade called out one last remark, “oh, and sensei? Make sure you keep up your physique for the duration of the mission.”

Iruka sighed. He didn’t plan on letting loose exactly, but he was enjoying getting to eat sweets again since the competition had ended. He guessed it wouldn’t be so bad to get back on some diet. He just hoped it wouldn’t be as intense as last time.

--

Iruka had some bad luck. It turned out, Tsunade had assigned Anko as the director of the photoshoot, and his superior for the mission. It meant he had a week of her strict diet and stricter training regime again.

He was so happy when the week was up, and it was the day of the photoshoot. His nightmare was almost over. The scroll did not mention he would have to do anymore shoots, so he was anxious and excited to get it over with and done well enough to never have to do it again.

A ninja he didn’t know, named Sukea, was the photographer. There was something about his smile that reminded Iruka of someone, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on it. All he knew is it made him feel warm inside, like he already trusted the stranger. Sukea had light brown short, messy hair, cute green-grey eyes, and a beauty mark below his lips to the left. Iruka was sure he would have noticed and remembered such a handsome face with purple tattoos running down his eyes. He was very noticeable. Iruka wondered where the cutie had been hiding. He then felt a little bad for thinking so while he was dating Kakashi. Iruka still a hot-blooded man though, and Sukea was attractive.

Anko pushed Iruka into the dressing room, commanding him to put on the armor quickly before they lost the “light”. Iruka rolled his eyes. Anko was just being difficult and commanding. What was new.

“I think the director of photography, Sukea-san, would know more about the lighting than you, Anko!” Iruka was very irritable. Anko hadn’t let him eat breakfast that morning and instead he had to do 100 of each, push-ups, sit-ups, pull-ups, squats, and toe-lifts.

He was cranky all week. Anko had decided that, unlike the muscle building vibes of the previous training, Iruka should be a little lither in this photoshoot. “We don’t want to be too intimidating if the point is to make the ANBU seem more friendly and relatable” was her argument. Practically that meant she had pretty much starved the poor sensei.

The body always took from muscle reserves first if in starvation mode, not that he had a lot of fat reserves after the previous training, and it made Iruka testy that whole week. His class figured it out day one when he yelled at one of them for munching on an apple during a lesson. They kept all food far away from the classroom after that.

Iruka felt really guilty for how he had treated Kakashi though. He couldn’t give all the details of the mission, but he had to cancel their third date since he couldn’t go out to eat. He also didn’t want to be around his crush while hangry. He promised the man another date after the shoot on Saturday though. He planned on eating an entire village worth of noodles immediately following this.

He also was hoping to eat something else after their date. Maybe he would get to see behind the mask finally. So far, they hadn’t had their first kiss, but Iruka knew Kakashi was itching for more. Iruka kept throwing the man flirty looks and flexing just right when he was looking. He knew he had to make Kakashi start the first moves because he didn’t want to misread the man and take his mask off if he wasn’t ready.

He wasn’t sure he would have the control this week while his mind was dizzy from lack of calories. It was for the best that Kakashi had been gone most of the week on some missions.

Irruka also was avoiding Kakashi when he was in town. He was sure it was the right choice. He planned to make up for it all soon either way. Maybe not with a stomach full of ramen, as he planned to have tonight, but soon.

Iruka finished strapping the buckles connecting the breast and back plates of the armor and walked out of the dressing area. There was a make-up artist and a hair stylist who made Iruka sit in a chair as they primped and polished his natural good looks. Iruka had to don a robe for this part, as the artists didn’t want to get anything on the uninform.

The hair stylist had taken strategic little hairs out of his ponytail and expertly curled them to fall alluringly to frame his face. They didn’t try to put his hair down, which Iruka appreciated, but he wasn’t sure Anko wouldn’t try and get a few shots without the pony anyway. The make-up artist was putting some low and high lights on his face so emphasize his already sharp cheekbones and nose. She painted just a little eyeliner on his top lid and added some mascara, just a little, but Iruka felt his eyes get dry all the same. It was just enough to make sure the lighting wouldn’t wash out his features.

This was a mission and he resisted tearing up or rubbing his eyes, like the good ninja he was.

While all this was happening, Sukea was taking a bunch of photographs. He explained it was to practice getting Iruka’s angles before the official posing. Iruka couldn’t help but he charmed by the smile and allowed him to get in closer than he normally would allow a camera.

When the make-up artist painted a little gloss on his lips, Sukea had snapped about a hundred photos. Iruka pouted slightly at the attention, but secretly was very much enjoying it. He turned to the cameraman when the make-up artist was done with his lips and moved to paint on the ANBU tattoo and made a kissy face. Sukea froze. Iruka had expected him to snap a hundred more pictures, but he only got one before his finger halted on the button. Iruka’s pursed lips turned into a smile as he jumped out of the chair; he maneuvered around brunet and patted him on the shoulder as he walked away. It jolted the man back to the land of the living and he turned to follow.

Iruka avoided looking at the mirrors, but he was sure he must have looked good. Why else would Sukea be so stricken. Maybe he was just being too bold. He would try to keep it professional from now on. No matter how comfortable he felt with the man, he was a stranger and Iruka should treat him as a colleague.

--

They wanted the photoshoot to seem more realistic, so they planned to use some locations throughout the village along with a studio for some black background ones.

They started in the village, hoping to get all the outdoor ones done while the sun was out and bright. Sukea handed Iruka the ANBU mask of the Hound. He could see the little scratches and nicks on the polished surface and knew that this was the original. How did Sukea have this mask? He knew Hound was retired and it was most likely Kakashi, but that was never confirmed. Maybe the rumors were false. He looked at the man with renewed respect and admiration. He lost that reverie when they arrived at the first location.

The first location was Ramen Ichiraku, much to Iruka’s chagrin. He was starving and the smell was making him salivate and lose all focus. His stomach growled so loudly that Teuchi laughed loudly. Ayame was in the background blushing as she looked at both Iruka in his ANBU uniform and at Sukea. Iruka didn’t notice when Sukea gestured the universal hush hand signal with his lip and finger at Ayame and winked. He just saw her nod and blush.

Iruka posed a few times on the stools, Anko directed him into strange positions, from crouching on a stool, to standing at the bar and looking at the camera from behind. She liked that one most since he had his arms up, lifting his mask off his face and onto the top of his head as he smiled to the camera. It showed all of Iruka’s best features, starting with his smile, going down to his sculpted arms, flexing perfectly, all the way down to his shapely ass in those tight black pants.

Sukea was trying to focus on things like lighting and framing, but instead he couldn’t stop focusing on Iruka’s frame instead.

They had taken equally as tempting and scintillating photos in the training grounds and in the center square. In the training grounds, Sukea’s favorite shot was Iruka sitting on a tree branch, the light was filtering through the leaves leaving bright and shadowed patches all over his body, his eyes were closed and his smile rivaled the sun.

In the center of town, they had to sequester the civilians and off-duty ninja away while shooting, but Iruka tried to be courteous. There were some very overzealous people in the crowd, watching Iruka with a look Sukea could only describe as hungry. It made him very uncomfortable and angry, but Sukea didn’t show any of that, Sukea didn’t know Iruka.

They finally moved to the studio that had been set up in a spare room of the academy for the blank background photos. Sukea suggested they get a few of Iruka at his desk first, which Anko highly approved of. Iruka was secretly grateful he had cleaned off the desk before he left yesterday.

Anko took some chalk dust on her hand and slapped Iruka’s ass, hard, leaving a white print on the tight dark pants.

“Anko! What is wrong with you?!” Iruka yelled, but before he could attempt to slap the dust away, Anko grabbed his wrist.

“Pose like you are teaching your students and you don’t know about the handprint,” Anko commanded.

Iruka glared for all he was worth, but reluctantly followed orders. She was so getting a mission to the swamplands the next time he was working the mission desk.

Sukea laughed behind his camera at the exchange, smiling encouragingly at the poor abused sensei. Inside, Kakashi was raging mad at Anko for that slap. She would rue the day. But he was also happily ogling the chalk outline, imagining how it would sting his hand to make the same mark on that firm, glorious glut.

--

Iruka was exhausted after the shoot so his dinner with Kakashi had been short as Iruka went home to sleep almost immediately after his second bowl of delicious ramen. He didn’t realize posing would take so much effort. But it had all been worth it because the posters were up and Tsunade had congratulated him for his hard work personally. She said the posters were “a huge hit. People are even asking for more!”

If it meant that the ANBU were not villainized in the village, it was worth it in Iruka’s eyes. He suspected many colleagues and peers of being in the secret group over the years and they were all admirable.

It only took Tsunade and Anko a week to get all the posters made and dispatched. Iruka didn’t really think it would change his perception in the village, but he was wrong. The day after the posters went up, he had even more people stopping him and asking for autographs or pictures. It was a bit overwhelming, so he started to take the rooftops more often to avoid the civilians and ninja. He figured it would all die down soon enough.

There was really no time to dwell on it anyway, not with the exams coming up. Iruka was swamped with exam prep, mission room duty, and his own personal life. Dating took time after all.

Kakashi was often assigned long missions, so when he was in town, they agreed to spend quality time together. Tonight, they had a date, a stroll down by the river at sunset. It was very romantic in Iruka’s opinion and was grateful Kakashi thought of it.

While he was walking with Kakashi, less people were brave enough to interrupt them to ask for Iruka’s time. Kakashi was grateful for his reputation and grateful that the riverside was typically less populated in general. Normally there were only couples there around sunset.

They did not have much time between work for many dates. Kakashi knew he was very smitten, and that Iruka was a good person, but he had not pulled his mask down yet. They had not done more than a cloth-covered kiss to the cheek.

He wasn’t sure if Iruka was frustrated by this or not. Iruka always seemed pleasant and happy on their few dates. Kakashi never felt pressure to remove the mask to take things further, though he was tempted thoroughly. Was he ready to bear it all to Iruka though?

Kakashi was drawn from his thoughts by Iruka tugging him along the path. He hadn’t realized he had stopped walking while he was thinking. Kakashi looked up into Iruka’s questioning face, the look was soft and concerned, but not intrusive. Kakashi never knew someone could emote so much without words. He himself tended to emote very little by expression or words.

It wasn’t very kind to Iruka. He took Iruka’s hand to his mouth and kissed the back of his hand through his mask. He rubbed Iruka’s knuckles and got back into pace beside the now blushing sensei. Kakashi got a strange mix of feelings at this. He was enraptured by Iruka’s pretty blush, but also got a tingling feeling, like he was being watched. There were other couples though, and Iruka was very popular right now.

“So, what do you have planned for the week?” Kakashi asked, hoping to distract himself from Iruka’s handsome face.

“Oh, well, the exam prep is getting really intense. It is only a few days away now. So, some late nights will be spent there. Then my normal schedule which you know.” Iruka glanced at Kakashi, the man did know most of his schedule since he would try and meet Iruka after classes or at his breaks. It was so sweet. Iruka wished he could give Kakashi something in return for keeping him company when he was lonely.

“What about you? Any missions?”

“Not this week. I’m not sure why, but I’ve been given a little vacation,” Kakashi’s eye crinkled in his form of a smile at Iruka.

“Oh, that’s horrible.” Iruka sighed.

Kakashi laughed, “I don’t deserve a break, sensei?” Iruka blushed hotly (at least Kakashi thought it was hot).

“No, no, no, I mean yes, you deserve a break. I just mean… well selfishly, I wish your break weren’t during the exam prep week! We could have had more… I mean, if you wanted, we could have… spent more time together.” Iruka ended his rant lamely, looking away from Kakashi to his right. Iruka always walked on Kakashi’s right side so he was by the good eye.

“That is tragic,” Kakashi added, and he believed it. Suddenly Kakashi got a very intense tingling feeling, like he was in enemy territory and being watched by a predator. It caused Kakashi’s instincts to kick in and he pulled Iruka in closer. “Do you sense anything?”

Iruka looked confused but pleased by being held closer. The feeling Kakashi got was even stronger now. “I don’t, but if you are uncomfortable, we could go somewhere more… private?” Iruka whispered it in his ear, so close since Kakashi had pulled him flush against him.

Kakashi blushed this time, his face felt like it was on fire as the breath ghosted over the shell of cartilage. “I would like that very much.”

Iruka smiled and pulled Kakashi toward the wooded area on the other side of the river. They melded into the shadows and the sensation ebbed. Kakashi was comfortable as they settled on the branch of a large oak, watching the sunset through the leaves.

“Do you feel more comfortable?” Iruka asked, looking over at Kakashi, who had not taken his eyes off Iruka since they settled on the branch. How could he when the light was making his bronze skin glisten and eyes sparkle?

“You have that ability, Iruka. I don’t know if I’ve ever felt this comfortable.” Kakashi didn’t mean to say so much, he had some mystery to uphold, right? The happy, small smile the stole across Iruka’s face made Kakashi think that he should be more open.

Iruka dropped his face in concentration suddenly, he held up his hand in a seal of confirmation, index and middle finger extended. Kakashi felt his instincts prickle, but he didn’t sense anything nearby. After a minute Iruka dropped the signal and opened his eyes.

“There isn’t anyone for 50 feet. I won’t relay what that couple is up to, but let’s just say, they will be occupied for a while.” Iruka had a very light blush dusting his cheeks, clearly embarrassed at having “spied” unintentionally on the couple. Iruka was fairly private and respected other’s privacy a lot.

Kakashi suddenly saw underneath the underneath. Iruka was waiting for him to make a move. Iruka wasn’t very imposing on his peers, and certainly didn’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. He wanted Kakashi himself to make his moves. Of course, the sensei wouldn’t just pull his mask down and plough forward.

Kakashi reached his hand up to his mask, his fingers hesitating and slow. He didn’t know why, but he was nervous.

“I can close my eyes, if it makes you more comfortable,” Iruka said, eyes already closed tightly as he faced Kakashi on the branch. Kakashi was so grateful for this sweet man.

Kakashi pulled his mask down, knowing Iruka would protect his secret, even from himself. “Thank you, Iruka.”

Iruka shuttered at the low rumble in Kakashi’s voice. The notes seemed to dance around his mind and vibrate in his chest. Did Kakashi always have such a surly tone?

Iruka felt his hand pulled up to Kakashi’s face. He shivered when he felt Kakashi’s bare lips under his fingertips. Kakashi released his hand and was right next to him, Iruka could feel him just centimeters from his face. He could feel his breath on his lips. Iruka moved his hand to behind Kakashi’s neck and drew the man in, lips finally meeting.

It was sweet, sitting on the branch as the sun sank lower. Iruka brought both of his muscular arms around Kakashi’s neck and Kakashi wrapped Iruka’s waist in his own strong arms. They made out like that for who knows how long before Iruka started to break away. He lightly bit Kakashi’s lower lip as he pulled away, and Kakashi’s mind went completely blank for that moment, lost in lust.

“I’m going to open my eyes soon,” Iruka warned. Kakashi drew his mask up on instinct, even before the warning, he was moving his hand to his face.

“Iruka, that was… thank you.” Kakashi wanted more. He wanted everything, but he also wanted Iruka to feel special. He wanted to wait until he was comfortable with Iruka seeing his face.

“Thank you, Kakashi,” Iruka giggled, clearly not expecting to be thanked for a simple kiss. It was sweet. Kakashi was sweet. So much sweeter than other people he had kissed. Iruka felt bad for the bite after Kakashi was so tender with his own passionate kissing, but selfishly, Iruka wanted to mark some part of Kakashi, even if he wouldn’t get to see it. He would know. No one else would know. It made Iruka’s stomach churn under his abs. Maybe he was just hungry. The sun had fully set, and he hadn’t eaten dinner. Or maybe he was hungry for something else.

“Want to get something to eat?” Kakashi interrupted his thought and he stared at the one eye. He looked… happy.

“Yes. Let’s.” Iruka hoped off the branch, he felt like he was sparking with energy after kissing Kakashi. He wanted more and his head was dizzy with it, or was that just the lack of calories? He could wait for more of Kakashi, though. He was patient and Kakashi was worth it.