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Din Djarin wasn’t used to small touches and gentle caresses. In fact, before you came along, it had been years upon years since he had been touched so softly by another person.
It all started the first week you were on board the Razor Crest. You had been utterly startled by him barging through the ramp, his clunky armor loud on the hard floors. He had been hurt severely while pursuing a bounty and was nearly about to pass out from all of the blood he had lost.
But then he was wide awake because you had taken off his chest plate to observe the wound. Your hands ripped his undershirt in haste to get to the wounded area, and his breath instantly hitched. Your smooth fingertips skated across his rough skin, and his heart pounded faster than ever. He couldn’t stop staring at you as you cleaned and sewed up his wound.
You were graceful. You were oh so soft. If he had died right then and there, he wouldn’t have been that sad. To get to touch you—to feel your hands on his skin. It was divine, truly. It was the most wonderful thing he had ever felt.
Ever since then, it was like the two of you were bound as one. You were always touching, constantly in the presence of one another. It was addicting—almost infuriating at the fact that you two had to have your hands on each other at all times. Even Grogu started to get a little jealous at the amount of times your presences were practically on top of each other.
But then all of a sudden you had stopped. Din didn’t know why, but he didn’t like it one bit. You had been so closed off all of a sudden, and he didn’t know what to do. You would barely speak to him as the two of you sat in the cockpit; the stars and far galaxies spoke louder than you did.
It was bothering him to no end, but a part of him was too afraid to ask. He was scared to know the truth of why you were desperately hiding away from him. Had you realized this life wasn’t for you? Had you realized how much of a complicated person he is?
So many questioned buzzed through his helmet as the void that ruptured the two of you spread further. It was horrid. The pure silence, the lack of tender hand-holding, and the absence of fluttering touches had made him feel lonelier than ever. It was all so bleak, so empty.
He just hoped that you were okay, that you didn’t regret a single thing. He hoped that the space he was giving you was enough. And that’s all he could do at the moment, was hope.
Din was currently sitting in the cockpit, pressing buttons here and there to make sure that the Razor Crest is running smoothly. You were all in the Outer Rim following a bounty, and he knew that it could get rough some times. Everything was so quiet other than the snores that left Grogu’s little mouth and the occasional creek of the ship.
He sighed as he heard you crawl up the ladder and open the door, the latch opening with a loud hiss. He didn’t turn around like he normally would, just in case you were cold and un-wanting. He didn’t want to scare you off, considering that it had been almost two days since you left your small room.
“We’re still in the Outer Rim. We’re not too far from Actlyon, so be prepared to land in two hours.” It came as no surprise that you were still silent, completely restrained by whatever was bothering you. He let out another sigh and sat back into his chair, hoping to get a little bit of shut-eye before you all landed.
But then he heard it. At first, he thought his mind was playing tricks on him, and his helmet was just messing with him. But then he heard it for a second time, and he could’ve sworn his heart broke into two on the spot.
Small sniffles permeated through the silence as though it was tidal waves crashing up against the shore. His head whipped around to see your eyes puffy and your cheeks wet from tears.
Coarse pain burst through his chest at the full sob that broke out of your mouth. Your hands reached out to grab anything that could support you, and Din wasted no time in getting up and walking over to you. At first, all he could think about was the high possibility of your rejection, but your body immediately latched onto his. He pulled you into his arms, your head dangerously close to his chest.
Each tear that ran down your face was heavy on his heart; his gloved hands would reach up and wipe them away as fast as he could. He lightly ushered you to let go for a moment, and his heart clenched as panic flashed across your face.
“I’m right here.” That seemed to calm you down for a second as he left you to stand there. He sat down into the pilot chair, and he patted his lap softly. You inched closer to him, his hand reaching out and grabbing yours. He then carefully placed you onto his lap. You wrapped your arms around his neck and stuffed your face into the crook of his neck. His arms quickly wrapped around your torso and kept you close as you sobbed into his cloak.
You kept muttering small words, some he couldn’t recognize and some he figured out was his name. Each and every time, he would pull you even closer and whisper into your ear, “I’m right here, cyare. I’ve got you.” And he waited. He waited for your weeping sobs to die down to low sniffles. It took quite some time, maybe an hour or so, before you were able to calm down.
Your voice was raspy as you spoke, “I’ve been having nightmares lately.” He tilted his helmet to signal an understanding because he did. He got them too, and sometimes he couldn’t sleep for days and days. He started to rub your back, the tips of his gloved fingers rubbing back and forth.
“They’re just...” You suck in a breath, tears already bubbling up on the surface just thinking about it. Din grabbed a hold of your hand to give you a squeeze of encouragement. “They absolutely horrifying. Even when I wake up, I don’t feel safe. I feel so frightened and helpless. It’s like I can’t escape from them even when I’m awake.”
You paused as a few tears slid down your cheek, your hands tightening around him as you try and stop yourself from crying again. “I thought that... I thought that if I stopped caring, I wouldn’t have those nightmares anymore.” You pushed your head back to look at him, staring right into his visor. “But you died, Din. Y-You were in my arms covered in so much blood and-”
You were interrupted by the screeching sound of his chest plate ripped off of his chest. He grabbed your hand and placed it on his heart. Your eyes widened slightly at the fast, thumping pace. “I’m here, okay? I’m here—I’m alive.” Pure adoration burst through your chest as his heart continued to pump against your hand.
Relief washed over you, and your shoulders relaxed slightly. Everything felt okay like a weight had been lifted off of your shoulders finally after weeks of denial. “I’m never leaving you, absolutely never, got it?”
You nodded, his other hand moving up to caress your cheek. Your head absentmindedly moves closer into his cheek, relishing in the warmth that’s radiating off of his hands. He leaned in a bit closer, “I don’t want you to ever cry again, cyare. I never want to see it again.”
You could hear the hurt in his voice at each syllable that releases out of his mouth. Your hand moves from his chest up to his helmet, palm resting on the cheek of his helmet. It was a cold contrast to his hand that was currently resting on his cheek, but you didn’t care. You wanted him to know that you were okay—that he made everything okay.
“I’m okay... I just- hold me. Please”, he nods almost instantly to your words, and his strong arms wrap around your torso. He was pulling you in, and you rested your face in the crook of his neck again.
“I’m right here. I’ll always be right here, with you. I’m yours.” He chuckled as he heard your faint snores echo through the cockpit, almost matching Grogu’s. You must’ve been exhausted from all of the crying, and he knew you needed the sleep. He lifts up his helmet only for a second to place a quick kiss on your forehead.
“Sweet dreams, cyar’ika.”