Work Text:
The smallest things are keeping me alive
“What is this really about?”
It was a hot day in Henrietta, the heat and humidity feeling even more oppressive inside Monmouth Manufacturing. That had been Blue’s first complaint. Then she had picked on his timing (“You had months to pack, why are you only doing it now”), on his clothes (“Really, Gansey? How many aquamarine polo-shirt could you possibly need?!”) and eventually even on his model of Henrietta (“I’m not going to box THAT”).
Gansey liked to think that, in the months of their friendship first and then something more, he had gotten to know her pretty well. He was confident he had made enormous progress since their first encounter, when he had inadvertently implied that she was a prostitute, thus offending her terribly. But he had grown, they had grown together, and he was now more aware of what came out of his mouth. It was clear that Blue was upset about something and she was just making up excuse to get into a fight - a very Ronan thing to do, except that Ronan didn’t usually need any excuse to fight. So he had asked. He had to.
“What’s this really about?”
For a moment, he thought he had made a critical mistake. Anger collected around Blue like gathering clouds and she actually seem to grow taller with the fury of her indignation but then, as quick as a summer storm, the anger vanished, replaced by an expression that he had troubles figuring out; an odd mix of insecurity and embarrassment.
“I saw your Sport Illustrated Swimsuit edition.” She replied in a soft voice
Whatever he had been expecting, it wasn't that.
“And you are hangry because it is a misogynistic magazine?", he ventured, uncertain and a bit embarrassed himself,"Because...”
“Do you like me?” Blue interrupted him, and for the first time in his life Gansey found himself speechless. Like her? She was the most magnificent creature he had ever seen, a miracle in a small, perfect form. Everything about her had him enthralled, spellbound but before he could think of a way to make her understand the maelstrom of emotions that she stirred in him Blue had rushed on to fill the silence
“I don’t look like them, I know. And since you..."she paused, grief flashing in her eyes "since Cabeswater vanished, you have not even tried to touch me, and you are male, and you are eighteen and maybe is because you don’t like me that way, I know that true love doesn’t have to mean that. Not that I am assuming to be your true love but...”
“Blue, stop.”
He walked up to her, taking her arms and pulling her gently to his chest. She went willingly, burying her face in his salmon t-shirt, embarrassed by her outburst.
“I love you.” He said. “I don’t need a prophecy to know that you are my true love, my soulmate, the only one in this world for me. And I love everything about you. Of course I like you, of course
I want to...” he faltered, embarrassed, but then continued, the need to make her understand burning in his voice. “I want to kiss you, and touch you, and held you always, in every way possible , in every way you would want me to. But if we can’t... I don’t need it. What I need is you. I will gladly live the rest of my life without kisses, without touches, if that meant that I get to live that life with you.”
Blue’s arms went around his back, and he rested his chin on the crown of her head. They stayed like that for a while, simply holding each other, their heart beating as one.
“I love you too” she said quietly.
“Thank you”, Gansey replied with a small and tender smile, wanting to lighten the mood, make her laugh. It worked and Gansey thought for the hundredth time that she was the thing that kept him alive. Her laugh, the twinkle in her eyes, her spiky hair and eccentric clothes and incredibly big heart.
She was looking him in the eyes, still smiling, when she said “Mum said it is safe now. Safe as life.” And pressed her lips to his.
Time stood still.
And then something happened. And they were not mirrors, they were not a sky made of stars and a boy made of forest, a girl that was a tree and a king. They were just them. Blue and Gansey. They were their heart beating together, their lips knowing one another.
Time began again.
“Safe as life.” Repeated Gansey, smiling a smile that lit up the universe, before kissing her again, and again, and again, for minutes, hours, days, eternity.