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It’s been four months and two days. Not that Jihoon is counting, he had just been searching through his camera roll and happened to spot the picture Soonyoung had made him send of his date outfit. That had been the night that he’d realized that Seokmin was more than worth keeping around. He almost can’t believe how much has passed already and now he’s here, attending Seokmin’s best friend’s wedding.
He looks up from his phone as music starts to play, quickly pocketing it and turning along with the rest of the crowd towards the entrance to the hall. The two mothers of the grooms step into the room, both holding red candles. Together they light the candle sitting on the table at the front of the room together, signaling the start of the ceremony. Next comes Mingyu, head held high. He looks emotional already, and Jihoon wants to nudge him gently in the side and tell him weddings are supposed to be happy events, but instead he just gives him a soft smile when their gazes lock and watches as he strides past to take his place in front of the altar. Finally, Minghao appears, cutting a striking figure in a dark suit with a silk red tie, an obvious tribute to his Chinese heritage.
As Minghao walks down the aisle Jihoon’s gaze is drawn towards the line of groomsmen standing at Mingyu’s right, namely Seokmin. He frowns when he sees the first few tears slip down Seokmin’s cheek even though logically he knows Seokmin is crying out of happiness, not sadness or pain. As the ceremony continues Jihoon is able to mostly pay attention, but occasionally sneaks a glance over at Seokmin, the other boy’s once calm composure steadily heading towards a full on breakdown. Jihoon sighs in fond exasperation, he’ll have to remind Seokmin to drink plenty of water later.
Used to both the Korean weddings of his youth and the few American ones he had attended since moving to LA, the ceremony is different from anything he’s ever been to before. The mixing of cultures isn’t seamless, but no one seems to complain, the faces of family and friends alight with joy and tears alike as Mingyu pulls Minghao in for a kiss. Everyone cheers as they separate, but Mingyu and Mingaho don’t seem to notice as they stare deep into each other’s eyes. Jun coughs lightly and that seems to break them out of their trance, the two of them turning to face the crowd with matching bright smiles. The crowd turns to watch as the entire wedding entourage steps down from the raised altar and walks across the reception hall to the long table set aside for them.
As guests rise to their feet and come forward to congratulate the happy couple Jihoon turns his head left and right, scanning the crowd for his boyfriend. Someone taps him on the shoulder and he turns to find Seokmin standing behind him. He offers Jihoon his hand, grinning despite the sheen over his eyes. Jihoon stands to his feet and takes it, letting Seokmin maneuver them through the crowd and up to the two groom’s table. They wait a few minutes for some of the crowd to clear away before stepping forward. Mingyu and Minghao look like they’ve just sat down but Mingyu springs to his feet anyway, grinning from ear to ear.
“Jihoon!”
Jihoon finds himself enveloped in Mingyu’s arms, far more gently returning the gesture for a brief moment before pulling away. He takes in a deep breath now that he isn’t being suffocated and inclines his head politely to Minghao.
“Congrats to you both.” Reaching into his pocket he pulls out a small packet of tissues and presses them into Seokmin’s chest. “Drink some water before your speech if you’re planning on crying again.”
Seokmin flushes in surprise.
“I-, um, thank you.”
Jihoon nods, turning on his heel and striding forward towards the small round tables where the rest of the guests are seated. He eyes the rest of the hall, the room itself is sparsely decorated, except for two unfamiliar Chinese characters that glow neon red above the drinks bar.
“Jihoon! Over here!”
Jihoon stops, backtracking until he’s standing next to a half full table full of familiar faces, Joshua, Vernon, Jeonghan, and Seungkwan. Joshua holds up a bright red name card.
“Unfortunately you’re stuck with us tonight.”
Internally Jihoon sighs in relief, the fact Seokmin isn’t dining with him would make any interaction with unfamiliar faces a thousand times more stress-inducing. He sits down in the empty seat to Jeonghan’s right, his stomach grumbling as he looks down at his empty plate.
“I hope we get to eat soon,” Vernon says, echoing Jihoon’s thoughts. To Jihoon’s slight dismay an unfamiliar face does appear, in the form of a dark-haired boy who slides into the seat next to Seungkwan. Jeonghan immediately taps him on the shoulder and leans in to whisper in his ear.
“That’s Lee Chan, from Seungkwan’s history class. I think he has a crush on either Seungkwan or Vernon, but I can’t tell which.”
Jihoon nods along as Jeonghan speaks, to be honest he prefers not to involve himself much in the general drama and intrigue of the group, but they are all well on their way to becoming close friends of sorts and he’s grown rather fond of Vernon and Seungkwan especially. It’s worth paying a little attention to this Chan boy at least.
“I’m hungry,” Chan says with a sigh, Vernon nodding in agreement. Seungkwan reaches up and tugs on Chan’s ear, scolding him gently.
“Don’t complain Chan, we’ll get to eat in a minute.”
“Yeah yeah, I know.”
Seungkwan rolls his eyes at Chan’s flippant tone.
“Then why’d you say anything at all?”
“Well—”
Chan is cut off by a rattling of chairs and a few excited voices, a table not far from them emptied as its guests head towards the food laid out along the far wall. It isn’t long before it’s their turn, everyone piling their plates full of Korean and Chinese catering. Dinner is relaxed, fun even, what with Joshua cracking jokes and Jeonghan telling far-fetched tales. Seungkwan, Chan, and Vernon all switch between light teasing, fond compliments, and in-depth discussions in the blink of an eye. Jihoon silently takes it all in, smiling to himself as he lifts his glass to his lips. Of course there is still an empty space where Mingyu, Minghao, Seokmin, and Jun, Minghao’s best man, should be. Jihoon can’t help but look over at the newly wedded couple’s table every so often, glad to see Seokmin sporting a happy smile again. He just wishes it was a smile he could see up close.
Once most of the crowd has cleaned off their plates Jun stands to his feet. He taps his fork hesitantly against the side of his glass, which doesn’t quite work as well as he’d probably hoped and it takes a couple of minutes to grab everyone’s attention, but eventually the room quiets down.
“Uh, hi, I’m Moon Junhwi. First off I’d like to make a toast to the happy couple!”
Jihoon raises his glass along with the rest of the room, Jun nodding and clearing his throat softly before speaking again. “
So I met Minghao a long long time ago…”
The speech is good: funny, sweet, and just short enough to be bearable. Jun takes a deep breath once it’s over, accepting the applause with a slightly red face. Once Jun is done Seokmin’s stands to his feet, his hands trembling ever so slightly as he takes the mic from Jun. His speech ends up being a little bit shorter than Jun’s, by design and because he’s crying so hard by the end of it that his words have long passed the point of being understandable.
Finally he takes a deep breath in and wipes the tears from his cheeks.
“I’m just so happy for them!”
He nods and lets the hand holding the mic drop down to his side. The guests all applaud as Minghao stands to his feet and guides Seokmin back down to his seat, equal parts concerned and amused. Jihoon watches him pull out the packet of tissues and blow his nose, wiping his eyes dry. He doesn’t realize he’s zoned out until a loud cheer breaks him out of his thoughts. He drags his gaze over to see Minghao smearing cake on Mingyu’s cheek, giggling at Mingyu’s weak attempts to fend him off. After the cake is served the DJ shows up. He’s dressed in a suit jacket and snapback with YY emblazoned on the front. The crowd instantly quiets when Mingyu and Minghao stand up and approach the center of the room for their first dance. Jihoon isn’t familiar with the song but it’s nice, gentle yet firm in its declaration of love. Mingyu looks like he can’t help himself, immediately pulling Minghao in for a quick kiss after it’s over, which makes Minghao flustered in a way Jihoon has never seen before.
He manages to free himself from Mingyu’s arms and approaches his mother, bowing his head and holding out his hand. Both of them dance with their mothers, slowly spinning them in the center of the room. All of a sudden the music changes, the mothers returning to their seats and groomsmen, kids, anyone under thirty really, crowding the dance floor. Jihoon finds himself pulled into the fray by Jeonghan, throwing his hands up in the air to Taio Cruz’s “Dynamite” and other popular mid-2000’s hits. Jihoon and his friends then form a loose circle, Minghao and Mingyu spinning each other in the center.
Jihoon spots Seokmin dancing across from him and the younger boy happens to look up in his direction, offering him a quick wave. Then he turns back towards Soonyoung and starts to drag him into the center as Minghao and Mingyu fade back into the crowd. Jihoon dances for a few more songs, slipping away back to his table in order to escape the noise and excitement for a bit. To his surprise Seokmin soon joins him, cheeks are flushed as he collapses into the seat next to Jihoon. settling his arm on the back of Jihoon’s chair.
“What? Tired already?” Jihoon says teasingly. Seokmin nods sheepishly, resting his arm on the back of Jihoon’s chair.
“A little, probably from all that crying.”
Jihoon wordlessly pushes his glass of water closer to Seokmin. He relaxes into Seokmin’s side as the younger boy talks with whatever combination of friends is not on the dance floor at the moment and steals bites of cake from Jihoon’s plate. Despite his supposed tiredness Seokmin eventually gets pulled back into the crowd by Soonyoung, Jihoon politely refusing a request to join them. Jeonghan keeps him company, the both of them laughing as Joshua proceeds to do the worm for a delighted crowd of young kids. The only other person at the table is Vernon and he seems to be rather intently focused on a certain section of the dance floor.
“God, stop looking so sad and go join them already.”
Vernon starts, looking over at Jeonghan in confusion. Jeonghan gestures with one hand over to where Vernon had been staring and Jihoon spots Seungkwan and Chan dancing with the others, matching grins on their faces.
“They’re obviously having a horrible time without you,” Jeonghan drawls sarcastically. Vernon hesitates, one hand perched on the back of his chair.
“Yah! Don’t make me drag you over myself,” Jeonghan threatens. Vernon laughs, jumping up out of his seat.
“Alright alright, I’m going.”
Jeonghan looks rather proud of himself as he sips his glass of champagne.
“Nice one,” Jihoon says amusedly. Jeonghan shrugs.
“We all need a little push sometimes.”
Jihoon takes another bite of his cake, barely registering as the current song switches into something soft and slow. Immediately Joshua comes walking up to them, his gaze focused on Jeonghan. He reaches their side bows deeply, extending one hand out with a soft smile.
“May I have this dance?”
Jeonghan grins, taking his hand and letting Joshua pull him towards the dance floor. Jihoon looks around, surrounded by empty chairs and half-full glasses. He sighs, taking another sip of champagne.
“Jihoon?”
He looks up, surprised to find Seokmin standing next to him. The younger boy’s hands are clasped behind his back and he rocks on his heels for a moment before speaking again.
“Do you want to dance? Like, with me?”
In a split second Jihoon registers his tiredness after a long of evening of festivities, one that drives him inwards and away from anything too overwhelming and on the other hand the empty table that surrounds him, and the fact that it’s Seokmin asking him for something.
“Alright,” Jihoon replies, scooting back his chair and standing up. Seokmin’s eyes widen and then he breaks out into a delighted grin, inclining his head and making a sweeping gesture towards the dancefloor. Jihoon leads them both to the edge of the dancefloor, having no desire to subject himself to more stares from gossiping grandmothers and half-drunk guests than necessary. Seokmin doesn’t comment on it, coming around to stand in front of Jihoon as the music fades away and a new song starts. He places one hand on Seokmin’s shoulder as the younger boy’s settles on his waist, reaching out to meet Seokmin halfway and intertwining their free hands.
“Um, I’ve never really slow danced before,” Jihoon confesses.
“Well good thing I have then,” Seokmin says. “Just follow my lead okay?”
Jihoon nods, looking down at his feet as Seokmin tugs him forwards. It definitely takes Jihoon a few minutes to get the hang of whatever they are doing, a box-step if he remembers correctly? Seokmin doesn’t seem to mind him stepping on his toes or stumbling over his own feet, the hand on his waist keeping him grounded as they circle around in their tiny corner of the dancefloor. Finally Jihoon gets a hang of the rhythm enough that he can look up instead of staring down at his feet the entire time. He’s not quite prepared to come face to face with Seokmin’s gentle smile, not his usual blindingly bright grin, but something soft and warm, full of so much fondness that Jihoon suddenly feels like he can’t breathe.
He turns his head and swallows, staring at their clasped hands as he composes himself. He risks a second glance upwards, a little more prepared this time. Seokmin’s smile is a little more comforting than overwhelming now, his heart rate slowing down as he grows accustomed to the feeling. Unbidden, his hand grips Seokmin’s a little tighter and he leans in a fraction of an inch, as close as he can get when they are constantly moving. He doesn’t think about the other dancing couples around them or where his feet should go next, just focuses on memorizing the curve of Seokmin’s jaw and the way his eyes sparkle in the soft lighting.
God I love him.
Jihoon blinks, stumbling a little as he registers the thoughts that had just passed through his mind.
“You alright?” Seokmin asks.
“Yeah, sorry.”
“If you’re tired we can--”
“No, no I’m fine,” Jihoon insists, relaxing when Seokmin nods and looks to the side, slowly stepping backwards. Jihoon follows, the weight of those three words settling on his shoulders. Should he… say it? He bites down on his tongue before it can betray him, a familiar hesitance holding him back. Of course it is something that should be said eventually, but now? Seokmin looks back at him again and Jihoon once again feels emotion rising up in him, a bit more steadily this time. He steels himself, letting the words form on the tip of his tongue.
“Seokmin I--”
He’s a moment too late, the younger boy dropping his hand and looking behind himself as the music switches to something more upbeat.
“Guess that’s our cue to leave,” Seokmin mutters, turning back to face Jihoon. “Oh, were you about to say something?”
Startled by the interruption, Jihoon’s courage is replaced by a slight pang of nerves as Seokmin focuses his full attention on him.
“No, it was nothing.”
“Okay, then let’s go see if there is anymore cake left!”
Jihoon chuckles in amusement at his boyfriend’s boundless energy, sighing internally as the younger boy turns around. There is in fact some cake left and Seokmin happily brings back another plateful to their table. Jihoon sits quietly next to him, half-listening to Seokmin talk as he watches various guests walk past. Jihoon yawns into his hand, glancing around the room. He realizes a good portion of the tables are dotted with empty seats and the DJ’s voice suddenly fills the air.
“Last song of the night everyone.”
Mingyu pulls a tired looking Minghao to his feet and they move to the center of the dancefloor again, only a few other scattered guests left to keep them company. Jihoon is glad that Seokmin doesn’t ask him to dance again, he’s quite reluctant to part from his chair now that he’s been sitting down in it for a while. Jeonghan and Joshua stop by to say their goodbyes and Jihoon wonders if he should ask Seokmin if he’d like to leave as well. A soft noise catches his attention and he looks up to see Chan sitting across the table, staring off into the distance. Jihoon follows his gaze out of mere curiosity, finally puzzling out that it’s Vernon and Seungkwan he’s watching, the two of them slowly swaying together in the corner of the dancefloor. They wear matching shy grins and Jihoon glances back at Chan, noticing the wistful longing in his eyes. Unlike Jeonghan, Jihoon has no intention of meddling in whatever those three have going on, but he silently wishes Chan good luck anyway. The song ends, people disperse, and Jihoon leans over to gently pat Seokmin on the thigh.
“Do you want to get going now?”
Seokmin looks around the room and nods. They say goodbye to Mingyu and Minghao, Jihoon wrapping a loose arm around Seokmin’s waist as they step out into the cool night air. It was a good day Jihoon thinks to himself, leaning back in his seat and looking out the window at the twinkling stars overhead. He barely registers the time passing, shaking himself back to reality as Seokmin pulls into the parking garage under his apartment complex. Jihoon unbuckles himself slowly, maybe he’s just tired but Seokmin’s presence feels so comfortable and warm. He twists in his seat to face the younger boy.
“Do you want to come in and have some tea?”
A soft grin stretches itself across Seokmin’s face.
“I’d love to.”
They ride the elevator up to Jihoon’s floor and quietly tiptoe down the hallway, mindful of the late hour. Seokmin makes a beeline for the kitchen while Jihoon heads into his bedroom, tugging off his tie with a deep sigh and tossing it onto the foot of the bed. A few minutes later he emerges from the bedroom dressed in sleep shorts and a too-big t-shirt that was probably Seokmin’s at some point. Seokmin is reaching up to grab a pair of mugs out of the cabinets, an electric kettle boiling next to him on the counter. In the silence of their little apartment (mine, his, theirs, the line is getting blurrier and blurrier these days) Jihoon wraps his arms around Seokmin’s waist and buries his face into the back of his suit jacket. Seokmin hums and Jihoon can feel it reverberate deep in his chest. The mugs make a soft clinking sound as Seokmin sets them down on the counter and the electric kettle dings off to Jihoon’s right.
“What are you feeling like tonight?” Seokmin asks. Jihoon turns his head to the side as he thinks for a moment.
“Is there any chamomile left?”
“Yes.”
“Want that then,” Jihoon mutters.
“Hmm, I think I’ll try the vanilla.”
Good, Jihoon had bought that on a whim and it had turned out to be far too sweet for his taste. He quietly watches Seokmin’s arm lift as he pours hot water into the mugs and comes back down as he returns the electric kettle to its stand. Jihoon sleepily rubs his cheek against Seokmin’s back and then releases him so that he can grab his cup of tea. It’s still far too hot to drink so he leans back against the counter, holding the string between two fingers and absentmindedly dipping the teabag in and out of his drink. Seokmin, being Seokmin, pulls out his phone to fill the silence with a bit of music.
“Today was so nice,” he says over an unfamiliar HONNE track.
“It was.”
“So who do you think will be next?”
Jihoon turns to look up at Seokmin in confusion.
“To get married!”
“Um, no one,” Jihoon replies.
“Oh c’mon, you’ve seen the way Jeonghan looks at Joshua.”
Jihoon gently blows on his tea.
“I mean yeah, they’ve been together a while right?”
“Yep! I could totally see them getting married.”
“Alright, maybe they might,” Jihoon concedes, “but the rest of us are more worried about next week’s essay than wedding rings.”
Seokmin pouts over his mug and Jihoon almost feels guilty, but it’s honestly more adorable than anything else. Seokmin finally sighs in defeat in the face of Jihoon’s impassive gaze.
“You’re right, you’re right, I just had fun is all. It gave me lots of ideas for my own wedding.”
Jihoon coughs into his fist, nearly spilling his tea all over the floor.
“Already thinking about that?”
Seokmin snorts. “Only since I was like, nine. Wait, don’t tell me you’re one of those people who don't have a Pinterest board dedicated to their future wedding.”
Jihoon shrugs.
“Nope.”
Seokmin shakes his head in mock disappointment.
“You’re gonna regret it someday when they ask you to pick a table centerpiece out of five thousand different options but you haven’t even decided on a theme yet.”
“That’s future Jihoon’s problem,” Jihoon states firmly, taking a careful first sip of tea.
“I feel sorry for him.” Seokmin says amusedly, picking his own mug up off the counter. They drink together in silence, at least until the song changes, which prompts Seokmin to set his mug back down on the counter and turn around, adjusting his suit jacket. “I love this song!”
Standing in the center of Jihoon’s tiny kitchenette Seokmin croons into his phone like it’s a mic, his exaggerated motions and dramatic facial expressions causing Jihoon to burst into laughter. Seokmin slumps back against the fridge, placing his hand over his heart as he belts out the last chorus.
“Stop, stop,” Jihoon manages to get out through his giggles, “or I might get a noise complaint.”
Seokmin grins back at him sheepishly, setting his phone back down on the counter. His expression morphs into something a little more mischievous and Jihoon barely has time to set down his mug of tea before he’s being yanked forwards into Seokmin’s chest. His laughter threatens to return as they mirror their position from earlier that night, but instead of a gentle box-step they swing their arms up and down playfully, Jihoon reaching up as Seokmin does an uncoordinated spin. Their dance moves grow more and more ridiculous as the song crescendos and eventually Seokmin stumbles backwards into the living room where there is a little more space (really not that much more). Unexpectedly Seokmin guides him into a low dip as the last notes of the song fade away, Jihoon laughs again as Seokmin rights him, gripping his arms tightly. Jihoon shakes his head as his laughter fades, leaning forward until his forehead comes to rest against Seokmin’s chest. He yawns, hands coming up to rest on Seokmin’s waist.
“One more song?” Seokmin asks hopefully. Jihoon blinks tiredly, it’s late and he’d really like to go to bed soon. Unbidden, his hands grip Seokmin’s waist a little tighter (usually he’s always the first to let go).
“Alright, one more song.”
Thankfully this one is quieter and they don’t really dance as much as sway from side to side.
“I love you.”
It’s a quiet confession and he doesn’t regret it even if Seokmin immediately stills in his arms.
“Jihoon?”
He looks up, surprised to find the younger boy’s eyes filling with tears again.
“Hey now, don’t cry, you’ve done enough of that today.”
Seokmin sniffles and rubs at his eyes with the back of his hand.
“Sorry I just...”
“You’re fine.” Jihoon reassures, gently rubbing his hands up and down Seokmin’s arms.
“I love you too,” Seokmin finally says, wrapping his arms tight around Jihoon. They stay like that for a while, Jihoon breathing in the fading scent of Seokmin’s cologne that still clings to his clothes. Eventually the music from Seokmin’s phone fades away as his phone presumably runs out of battery. Seokmin’s grip loosens and Jihoon pulls back just enough that he can look up at the younger boy. He closes his eyes as Seokmin leans in, gently pressing their lips together. One of his hands reaches up to cup the back of Seokmin’s neck, mouths moving slowly in tandem. He presses one last kiss against the younger boy’s lips, sighing softly as they separate.
“It’s getting late,” he murmurs. “Do you want to just stay the night?”
“Well… as long as it’s not too much of a bother.”
“Of course not.”
“Okay then,” Seokmin replies, letting Jihoon go only to intertwine their hands as Jihoon leads him towards the bedroom. He offers Seokmin a spare toothbrush, climbing into bed as Seokmin cleans himself up in the bathroom. Jihoon flushes as he remembers this is only the second time Seokmin has spent the night and pointedly avoids looking at the younger boy as he returns from the bathroom and starts to take off his suit. Instead Jihoon fluffs up his pillow, curling up on his side as Seokmin slips under the covers next to him. He watches as Seokmin gets comfortable, tugging the covers up under his chin.
“Goodnight Jihoon.” Seokmin whispers.
“Goodnight Seokmin.”
Jihoon lets his eyes slip shut, the only sound in the room that of their slow breaths.
“Love you.”
Jihoon smiles softly to himself.
“Love you too Seokmin.”