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"I… I should probably go home," Loki said after a while. A while spent staring, and staring, and staring as Loki's hands hesitantly cradled the soft swell of his belly, only noticeable because Loki's hands were there, framing it, a moment frozen in time.
It was painful to watch, really. Sitting there, looking up into Loki's face, half obscured by those soft curls Thor had been dreaming about only hours earlier. God, he had been counting down the very minutes for his plane to land, thinking of Loki waiting for him outside. He would hug him, Thor had thought, and he would bury his hands in those curls, capture his lips in a searing kiss, parting only when his lungs couldn't take the strain anymore. And he had done it, exactly like that.
Loki had blushed, laughing awkwardly, still not used to Thor's particular brand of public affection, even after three years into their relationship, but his smile… oh, his smile had been glorious, absolutely radiant. Thor lived for that smile.
It had taken his breath away, back in his apartment, when Loki had taken his hands in his and guided him to the couch, smiling that very same smile.
This is it , Thor had thought, hands shaky with excitement. This is it.
They were finally moving in together.
"I have something to tell you," Loki had said, chewing on his bottom lip, but his smile wouldn't be suppressed. No, sir. It had broken through anyways, alighting Loki's face with its sheer strength, and Thor had asked, "Yeah?"
Loki had brushed his hair behind his ear, had played with a stray curl for what couldn't have been more than two seconds, but by the time he'd opened his mouth again, Thor had been ready to spring up from his seat.
"I know it's a little early in our plans, but…"
Yes? Thor had prompted mentally, but experience had taught him never to rush Loki. Just wait. He'd come around once he was ready, never earlier than that, so Thor had patiently shouldered a year of practically living together, of sleeping in the same bed more often than not but always with the knowledge that they would part ways come Monday. But maybe… maybe Loki was finally ready to make it permanent?
Oh, fuck it. He couldn't wait a second longer.
"Baby, you're killing me."
That little, breathy laugh again, and then—
"I'm pregnant," Loki had blurted. "Three months last week. I wanted to tell you, so badly, but I wanted to do it in person. It didn't seem right to… Thor?"
Staring.
And staring.
And more staring.
Pregnant .
Thor had known this was a possibility obviously. They had discussed the chance of having children later in their relationship, back when Loki had confessed he was intersex with a chance of being fertile.
"Would this… would this be a problem?" Loki had asked, legs shut tightly closed, hands sandwiched between them.
So Thor had squeezed his knee instead. Had said, "Not at all," and had meant it.
He had meant it because, more than anything, more than curious, even, he had simply been relieved Loki wasn't getting bored of him, as he had increasingly feared each time Loki rebuffed his advances, but this … well, this had explained why Loki refused sexual intimacy, and it had also marked a turning point in their relationship. For the first time, Thor had been able to say that his thing with the dark-haired beauty he'd spotted all the way across the room at an art auction was serious. For the first time, they had shared their plans for the future—the possibility of having children . It had been a good night.
Tonight could be a good night, but Thor had been forced to watch that dazzling smile he so craved slowly perish with each second he remained silent—staring.
It was painful, really. How Loki's nervous happiness had turned into this. This silent resignation.
"It's fine. I get it," he said, hugging himself around the waist, and Thor knew he should speak, but God, he was in shock. There was a baby in Loki's belly. Loki was pregnant. With their baby. God. "Really, I do. You're not ready, and this is weird, and that's… that's okay. I mean, it was fun while it lasted. Right?"
Wait, what? Fun while it lasted ?
What?
"Baby—" he began, but Loki was already snatching up his jacket from the coffee table, so Thor did the only thing that came to mind.
He wrapped his arms around Loki and pulled him into his lap, where Loki landed with an undignified squawk.
"Move in with me," Thor blurted.
"I'm pregnant, Thor," Loki repeated, face clouded with wariness, like he couldn't believe that Thor had heard correctly, that he had heard correctly, but of course he had. They both had. Not only were they moving in together, but they were also having a baby. What had Thor missed?
Oh, God. Oh, fuck. They were having a baby, an actual blood-and-flesh baby. And it was growing in Loki's belly. At this very moment.
"Pregnant," Thor repeated in disbelief, laughing breathlessly, hugging Loki tightly. "We're going to have a baby."
He couldn't get enough of that idea.
"Yes," Loki confirmed, relaxing just a little, but he gaped in shock when Thor gave him a big kiss right on the mouth, sound effects and all. He could be a kid like that. And now he was having one of his own. He was going to be a dad.
"Three months, you said?"
Loki nodded, biting his lip again as he tried to hide his smile, the one that bloomed so naturally when Thor splayed his hand over his belly, Loki's bump still small enough to be comfortably covered by his palm.
"Oh, Loki, baby. This is wonderful. You're wonderful. You're moving in, right?"
Loki chewed his lip some more, no doubt enjoying letting Thor stew like Thor had let him stew, but eventually, finally he said, "Okay."
"Okay?"
"Yep. Okay."
Thor laughed softly and pressed his forehead to Loki's, Loki's arms returning his embrace. He tilted his head and leaned in for a kiss, feeling childishly giddy when Loki returned it.
Eventually, Loki pulled away, annoyance ringing in his voice, like Thor had done something particularly stupid or embarrassing.
"Thor, oh my God. Thor. Are you seriously crying?"
So he was! Yes, he was crying. So what?
"You just make me so happy."
Loki sighed, tiredly and quite audibly. "Sap," he muttered, but he snuggled close to Thor, his head falling on Thor's shoulder, where Thor could bury his nose in his hair, breathe him in, that sniff of lavender, what Loki would rub behind his ears before every outing. He would uncap his little container, place it under his nose, breathe it in. His eyelashes would flutter, the tension bleeding from his body, and then he would roll his finger over the ball and rub it behind his ears. For a little peace, he would tell Thor.
That was the smell of home.