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amber was never stupid.
sure, she may have been labelled ditzy or an airhead from here to there, but the young outrider was much more intelligent than she let on.
which is why she always knew that one day she would have to say goodbye.
to let go.
despite it all, she let herself hold on to the flame of hope in her heart that burned fiercely; all of her dreams and desires fuelling its warmth that thawed the icy doubt eating away at her.
perhaps the chilling realization that she was alone, terribly alone, was what left her in her current position atop the shores of cider lake. one of her precious baron bunnies was perched in her lap, pale arms wrapping around and squeezing the soft plush. her honey-colored eyes held a certain heaviness that those around her were displeased to see, unsure of what to say about the unfamiliar expression weighing down their beloved gliding champion.
the young woman knew that if she were to turn around, she would see nothing but the glow coming from the heart of mondstadt; lights strung around the statue designed of barbatos. the scent coming from the various food stands that always were set up around ludi harpastum was carried on the wind, drifting to where she was. as if mocking her, her hair fluttered and she could hear the distant laughter of young teenagers as they floated from stand to stand, lighthearted festivities flooding the environment.
---
“amber! look at this!”
“is that the pile ‘em up stand?! come on lumi, we gotta go!”
“wAH- don’t drag me like that!”
the two girls made their way through the crowd, weaving in between various civilians with amber leading a frazzled lumine who mumbled various apologies. it was a wonder how the former’s headband hadn’t fallen off yet with the speed of which she ran. her warm hand fit easily around her partner’s cooler one, as if they were simply made to be together. it was rare for them to be so truly carefree and burdenless, as their respective occupations often left them scrambling for chaste cheek kisses and rushed mumbles of ‘i love you’ in the morning. amber, although choosing to accompany lumine whenever possible, still had her outrider duties to attend to, and the latter had to save the world and find her brother.
so, it was reasonable that they never seemed to have enough time to themselves.
having the time for them to truly be able to bask in each other’s presences and take a few days off was a rare miracle that was always appreciated. especially with lumine having just returned from the dry warmth of sumeru, they couldn’t help but feel like the luckiest people in all of tevyat.
“hellooo! it’s me again!”
“ah, it’s miss amber! you’re always welcomed to challenge yourself with the most popular game in all of mond…. PILE ‘EM UP!”
she laughed heartily, hands clasping together with excitement as the ears of her headband almost seem to twitch as well. reaching into the pocket of her shorts, she pulled out a small pouch of mora and undid the string, opening the cloth and shaking a few of the golden coins into her palm. counting silently, she gently placed some of the currency into the stand owner’s outstretched hand.
lumine watched from a few feet away, a warm smile painted across her face as she runs dainty fingers through her golden hair. her eyes seemed to almost sparkle with delight as she watched her partner begin the game, the elder’s eyebrows furrowed with concentration as she seems to have internal turmoil as to what to place first. the breeze was light, whistling as it blew past her ear and ruffled the various trails of fabric of her dress. twirling gracefully, she caught a glimpse of a knowing smirk as a figure clad entirely in green seemed to be one with the wind. a heat crept up her cheeks as she realized what the little bard had done, and her hands flew to the flower tucked carefully behind her ear.
sure enough, residing beside it was a cecilia, fully bloomed.
sputtering quietly to herself, she fought the raging blush that was plastered from cheek to cheek, and eventually found her gaze once more gravitating to the subject of her affections.
sure enough, a pair of eyes the color of honey were staring right back at her, irises wide with adoration and care.
the traveler was rarely left breathless, but being in the company of a special someone certainly changed that statistic. currently, with her brown hair freely blowing in the gentle wind as the sun’s rays poured down, basking her figure with a golden glow, lumine was certain she had never seen a sight more breathtaking. it was as if time stopped, leaving them lost in each other’s worlds without a care. the rest of the cheery ludi harpastum washed away, the cheers and bright chatter fading into the background as an outlander and outrider locked eyes.
amber and lumine.
lumine and amber.
an unspoken promise to always stay by each other’s sides, until the bitter end. they had unknowingly swore themselves to the other; like two opposite poles of a magnet. no matter what, even through the struggle, they always found themselves together.
it took a child bumping into her to knock lumine out of her amber-induced hazy state of mind, and clearing her throat, she began bridging the gap. every step forward, every inch crossed; bringing them closer and closer, until she stood right in front of her beloved.
pale fingers reached up carefully, pulling the cecilia from its residence and reaching across to gently place it amongst brown locks of hair. lumine stared, searching her expression for any sort of reaction.
the warm grin that spread across amber’s face and the equally warm embrace she was tugged into made the wait all worthwhile.
---
“lumine? were you even listening to me?”
a familiar voice pulled her out of her thoughts, pulling her cruelly from the memories upon which she found herself lost in. she shook her head weakly, resting her chin atop her knees.
“ludi harpastum, aether…” she found herself whispering, trembling hand shakily reaching for the flower behind her ear, reaching for the ghost of a warm touch that once fussed over the flora left behind. she barely heard the soft intake of breath from her side, nor did it quite register that an arm was slung across her shoulders.
“i’m sorry, lumine… i’m really sorry.”
“i know. i am too.”
no more was exchanged between the twins, and the only noise interrupting the otherwise-would-be silence was the gentle lapping of the waves against the sandy banks. a gentle wind began to sweep through the area, and she swore the familiar scent of nighttime escapades and adventures in the pouring rain was carried along with it.
as she choked on a sob, unshed tears leaving her eyes swimming, she found her gaze trailing back to the horizon. the sun seemed to be beginning to dip below the skyline, its soft rays setting over paradise.
but what did ‘wonderland’ mean when it was supposed to be their paradise?
---
“hi, amber.”
those gentle words broke amber’s train of thought, head snapping over to the source of the voice.
it was a certain brunette librarian, emerald eyes softened with concern. a purple-gloved hand rose to wave at her, just as a second figure broke through the shadow of the trees. with a blonde ponytail fluttering gently behind her and a stance wearing the same confidence she seemed to carry at all times of the day, jean took a stand beside lisa. amber gave her own half-hearted wave, greeting her superior with what she hoped came out as respectful enough. as she looked back to the nightsky, she missed the pair exchanging a look before quietly approaching her. without so much a word, they sat beside her.
although her lips quivered, warm hands clenching in an effort to keep her tears at bay, she couldn’t help the stray droplet that slowly made its way down her cheek. it seemed as though her facade was broken then, as before she knew it, amber was sobbing into her hands. she gasped for air in between her cries, her sorrows spilling into the darkness. jean reached out, carefully wrapping her arms around the younger in a tight hug. her face remained stoic, yet her gray eyes closed as she rubbed large circles into amber’s back.
she could only cling onto jean in return, gripping the dandelion knight as if she were a lifeline; the only thing keeping her from sinking into the stormy waters of her despair.
the forests of the city of freedom echoed with the anguished screams of someone who had lost it all.
---
the next day fared no better for either of them. both woke up, eyes puffy and hair disheveled.
a tray of food slid under lumine’s door, yet she was wrapped entirely in the soft blankets of her bed and didn’t bother to go toward it.
amber stared at her own untouched meal, delivered to her courtesy of a particular one-eyed cavalry captain. her gaze flicked past it, instead focusing on the carefully preserved cecilia pressed in between the glass of a picture frame that resided atop her nightstand. without thinking, she was suddenly sitting atop her covers, reaching out for it. the outrider held it close to her chest, subconsciously tucking it close to her heart.
“i’m not moving on.” she whispered, and for a split second it almost felt as if she weren’t alone. as if lumine were there, a phantom-like touch enveloping her back as it felt like soft hands gripped her own gently. perhaps it was her own imagination, delusion after having her partner torn out of her arms so quickly, but she swore she could hear a voice in her ear.
“i’ll love you long after you’re gone.”
a faint smile makes its way across her face, and her grip on the frame tightens.
“and long after you’re gone, gone, gone.”
fin.