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Ten made clear he was not going to the ball. He repeated it several times and Jaehyun kind of believed it. Maybe that was his first mistake.
He was putting his best white shirt on -the one from his father, with golden details- when his mother knocked on his wooden door, announcing the arrival of his best friend. He sighed, he was supposed to pick his date up before nine.
“I heard that you’re going with Sooyoung”, was the first thing Ten said after shutting the door. His hair was disheveled, his clothes dirty with mud and probably the owner of the house made him leave his boots in the gateway. Jaehyun didn’t want to ask why, but for the sake of his friendship, he should have.
“I am.”
“She’s a pretty woman, you two are going to be a cute couple when the clock strikes twelve.”
“Not if the prince sees her first.”
That was the entire reason for the ball. The prince was turning twenty three soon and he needed to get married to someone to keep the throne. It was pretty controversial when it was announced, because a lot of the people kind of expected the young royal to not follow the crown’s rules. He remembered hearing about his stories in town when he was a little kid, the prince being a kid as well. Wild, kind and revolutionary. Everything changed when he turned seventeen, or so he thinks he heard. He hasn’t been seen since that birthday and now years later he would show himself again as a man.
The celebration was in the big hall of the palace. The condition to enter was to have a young woman as company, and every young man was going mostly for courtesy, a good time and, obviously, to look for a partner. He liked Sooyoung, she knew that already, and it was going to be their first dance so he was nervous about it.
But forget the situation and the prince. Ten was in his room covered in mud and Jaehyun was going to be late.
“I’m going to be late.”
“I know. That’s the thing.”
“What? Why?”
His friend laughed a little and passed his fingers through his hair, sighing. “I need a change of clothes and your horse. I’m sure Sooyoung would understand, the ball is going to be ruined anyway.”
“What do you mean?”
“I can’t get married when I fell in love with someone already.”
It took him only nine seconds to figure what Ten wanted to say with that.
“Lord, so you are the prince?”, he whispered, as if somebody else was watching them. He felt himself shiver, it couldn’t be. But it could, and suddenly everything seemed to make sense: the way he found a nineteen-year-old Ten hiding in the market, the pricey gifts he used to give, how he was so educated while talking about politics and war tactics, how he used to dream about an utopical land where everyone would be happy, people just being who they wanted to be. Because Ten always wanted freedom and to be himself. But it was too ideal and too unreacheable to be done, and he also knew that. He watched his friend nod his head.
“I’m leaving.”
“Where?”
“Far from here. Jaehyun, there’s no room for me here. My younger brother, Dejun, is getting married soon and he will get the throne. We were educated together so our people will be having a good leader, I’m sure of that. But I don’t belong in a palace where I can’t be with whom I want to be. I can’t make an entire kingdom happy when I can’t make myself. Nobody expected me to take the crown anyway.”
He felt pain in his chest. His friend was suffering, he never noticed, and now was saying goodbye.
“For how long?”
“Until Dejun or death finds me.”
“Then why the ball?”
Ten laughed, loud now, “We saw each other for the last time two weeks ago, you said my head was in the clouds, remember? My mother knows about my sins, she doesn’t want his son to be a disgrace, so I convinced her I would marry a kind woman, and I wish I could just simply make that happen.I told everyone that I had a tailor friend with an special suit to wear tonight, that’s why they let me go outside, I distracted the guards and ran here.”
“What’s with the mud?”
“I had to hide somewhere.”
Jaehyun sighed and put his shoes on. He wished Sooyoung would forgive him for leaving her waiting before he stood up and motioned Ten to follow him outside.
Twenty minutes later, Ten was already riding the horse with a bag of fresh clothes.
“Thank you, you have been a gracious friend. Hopefully, we will see each other again.”
He bowed and listened to his friend's laughter for the last time, “We will.”
“Also, I need one last favour”, he said while extending his left arm to Jaehyun. It was a letter. “It’s for my father and the only explanation I have. It’s fine if you read it, but please let it reach its destination for the peace of my family.”
“I will.”
And then he left.
✧◦✦◦✧
Sicheng covered his hand with his fingers. It was a warm touch, as always, the pretty moments that could only happen with him. And he was so afraid for what was going to happen the next day. He revived every single part of the plan as he stared into the eyes of his beloved. He couldn’t believe he was doing this, the price for freedom was abandoning his father, his brother, and his mother was so angry at him she almost discovered that Sicheng was the one, that night when she intruded in his room and demanded to know the name of the woman who stole his son’s heart. She wasn’t happy with the answer and Ten was so tired of pretending he let her know.
“We will be okay”, he reassured him.
“We will.”
✧◦✦◦✧
my eyes made me fall in love with a human. a beautiful, kind, so lovely soul that makes me feel like i have seen it before, every time. like a clock, my heart goes wild when i think about it, smile gracing my lips when i think about him. kind of impatient, sunny skies and pretty clouds are nothing compared to the rain of happiness that takes place in my fingers when i imagine his around mine. the rainbows are so curious of who he is, the sunset seems content about he and i; but the dark reminds me that i can’t. it’s difficult to focus on what i have to do, sometimes i tend to forget what’s my mission here, because i think about his voice saying goodbye and i can’t take the salt that leaves my eyes. if i could, i will. and it is so sad. so i say sorry, my father, i am sorry to tell you that my eyes made me guilty of sin again. because i could not resist it, so i admit it: i fell in love with someone that’s not made for me. a man.