Archive of Our Own

year 1:

"I just moved into my apartment three days ago," Willie groans.

"I just moved into mine last week," Alex calls from where he's adjusting the TV on the entertainment stand. "You're not special."

Willie groans again. Alex turns around and sees Willie flopped on the couch still in the middle of their foyer after having just maneuvered the couch through the entryway. "Alex," he whines. He looks over at him with wide eyes. "I don't wanna do this."

"Go sleep in one of the guest rooms then."

"I don't wanna do that either."

"Go fly back to your parents then."

"I don't wanna do that either."

Alex levels him with a look. "Then…"

"Then… you're Prince and you should have people doing this for you?"

Alex frowns. "They're bringing the stuff up, isn't that enough?"

"No."

Sighing, Alex walks over and kneels in front of Willie. Willie blinks up at him and Alex can see that Willie isn't exaggerating even through his playful tone—he can see the exhaustion in his features. "We'll ask Grandma and John and Alden to help, but that's it. I want this to be our space, okay? I know I'm asking a lot since you just flew in yesterday, but, I just… I don't want to invite anyone and everyone into our home."

Willie leans up and kisses Alex. "I like that compromise," he says. "And I—I get it. I'm sorry, I am, I'm just—"

"You don't need to be sorry—"

"Maybe I don't need to be, but I am. We moved you in and then no less than a week later Micah and I spent four days moving into our apartment and then I drove five hours, spent a day with my parents, and hopped on a plane. I'm just… I'm just tired, y'know?"

"Which is why you don't need to be sorry."

Alex had moved into an apartment on Stanford's campus the week after graduating high school. Willie, Julie, Luke, Reggie, and Flynn had driven up with him in two cars and a rented U-Haul and they set to work moving him into the place he'd call home for the next four years—save for the summers and winters which he'd be spending in Beasiga. Because, see, it didn't make sense for him to leave his stuff at his parents and then haul it up to Stanford every year, and then haul it back. It really didn't make sense for him to lug any more than he needed to to Beasiga. So his grandmother offered to pay for an apartment, which Alex reluctantly accepted after much convincing on her part. She then offered to pay for one for Willie as well, but Willie was already planning on renting one with his freshman roommate. Still, Willie didn't get out of that deal, and Micah got lucky—Alex's grandmother covered the cost.

Alex made it to Beasiga three days before Willie did—he had stayed to help haul Willie's stuff up to Berkeley and get it moved in, and stayed with him the first and second night. However, he left to catch a flight the second night because he had a meeting with Italy in two days and wanted to be in Beasiga for it rather than having to take it over video from his boyfriend's bedroom in Berkeley. So while his days had been hectic as well, he was still more rested than Willie, especially because he wasn't fighting the jetlag as severely as Willie was at this moment. So, he was better off.

They call his grandmother, John, and Alden and over the next several hours their chambers stop looking like chambers and start looking like home. The space was almost exactly like a single story house or an apartment, except it is much more spacious and much nicer than anywhere almost any other 18 and 19 year old couple could afford.

There was a foyer which branched off to an open family room on the right and to the left was an archway that led to an office. Continuing in brought you to the living room on your left, which was wide open and spacious. Alex had genuine concerns about what they were going to put in the space to fill it. Across from the living room were the dining room and the kitchen, both open to one another, though the kitchen was partially closed off to the living room, with a cut out in the wall for a breakfast bar. Past all of that, there's a hall—down the hall is the master bedroom to the right, a bathroom to the left, and the last door on the left is a spare bedroom. Both the master and the spare bedroom have balconies that you can step out onto to look out over the courtyard and gardens.

After a few hours of work, Alex looks around him and it hits him that—this is actually happening. This is actually going to be his home. God, this already is his home. He looks at Willie who is sticking the plates in the cupboard, laughing at something Alex's grandmother says. This is actually his home with Willie.

Oh god.

What if they can't do this? His grandmother didn't even let them sleep in the same room last year since Alex wasn't eighteen and now they're jumping straight into living together for—what is it? Classes start eight weeks from now?—almost two months. What if something goes horribly wrong? What if Willie gets sick of him? What if going to bed next to him and waking up next to him gets boring? What if they get in more fights because of the proximity? What if they find out new things about each other that break their relationship? Oh god. Oh god. What if this breaks their relationship? Alex can't do this without Willie. He knows how pathetic that sounds but he really doesn't think he can do this without Willie, he's grown too accustomed to Willie's presence, too dependent on his help, too reliant on his guidance.

"Alex."

Alex snaps his head up, startled to find Willie standing in front of him. He can feel his hands shaking at his sides and feels his eyes wet with tears.

Willie reaches a hand up towards his face but hesitates at the last minute before he actually touches him. "What's—what happened?"

"What if we can't do this?"

"Do this?" Willie asks, a hint of confusion in his voice. He furrows his eyebrows together and frowns, thinking. His face smooths out. "Live together?" Alex nods. Willie sighs. "Can I touch you?" Alex nods. Willie's hand curls around his jaw and Alex turns his face into it, thankful for the warmth. "Alex, I'm not going to tell you it's going to be the easiest thing, but I know we can do this, and I know you know we can too. C'mon, tell me what you're worried about, okay?"

"What if you get sick of me?"

"What if you get sick of me?" Willie shoots back. Alex shakes his head. That's not going to happen. Willie keeps Alex on his toes, Willie keeps life interesting. Alex feels like he's only got a few settings and after a while those will get boring to Willie who has such a broader view on the world. "See, you say no because you probably think that sounds ridiculous. Your question sounds ridiculous to me too. We've spent hours upon hours together, and I still always want to spend more time with you. I've never reached a point where I've ever been… relieved? that our time is done. I always want to stay with you. You're my favorite place."

Okay, but—"What if we fight more?"

Willie hums and takes a step closer. "Then we fight more. But they're just fights. We'll get over them, I promise. We've gotten through them before. And we learn how to communicate better so maybe in the future we fight less."

"What if we find out things about each other that we didn't know before?"

"So?"

"So what if they're bad things?"

"So?"

"So what if we stop loving each other?"

Willie shakes his head. "No. No. At least not for me, no. If… Nothing could make me stop loving you because I love you for a thousand reasons, and those reasons are made up of good and bad. And yeah, maybe I'll find something about you that drives me mad. But no way is that going to matter more than all the reasons I love you. And I hope it's the same for you with me."

"It… yeah."

"I'm glad." He strokes his thumb over Alex's cheek and presses a kiss to his forehead. "What else?"

"I—I don't know. I just. I can't do this without you, Will. I had—I had one fucking thought and I—"

Willie's shoulders deflate, and his eyes soften. "I know," he murmurs, because he does. Because he knows Alex (and he loves Alex, even knowing Alex). "I can't do this without you either, you know that, right?" Alex hums. He didn't know that but he doesn't want to admit that to Willie. "Hey, so, we've only got half the kitchen, the bathroom, and the office left to unpack. I sent Louisa, John, and Alden home. Why don't we call it a day on moving in and finish tomorrow? It's been—what, ten hours of this? I think we can have an early dinner, watch a movie, and then head to bed early."

Alex blinks. Okay, maybe this is like, a bit of a one-eighty but god, he can't believe he was worried about this. After all, it's only eight weeks. Alex knows in eight weeks, despite only being an hour from Willie, there's going to be plenty of times that he's going to long to be back here. He hasn't even spent a night with Willie yet—well, okay, he spent the night in Willie's apartment with him, but that's not what he's talking about—but he knows, he knows that this is going to work. Because no one else gets Alex the way that Willie does, no one else would be able to reassure Alex the way that Willie has. And Willie knows exactly what Alex needs, is completely ready to sit and have a relaxing evening with him because Alex worked himself into a small anxiety attack about them living together and—it's just. It's just, he thinks this is going to work. So he nods, and they move to their kitchen to start on dinner and. It feels right.

-

year 2:

It's a little weird, Willie thinks, to live in a palace.

Like, okay. First off, a palace? Those always belonged in fairytales—fuck him if he ever thought he'd be living in one. But like, also? He looks behind him, where palace staff are wandering about. A footman wanders down the hall, a butler makes his way back to the kitchens, and a maid carries what Willie assumes to be Louisa's lunch to her chambers. That—that's another thing. Chambers. But like—what the fuck else is he supposed to call them? Rooms? That's a gross under exaggeration.

It's just—Willie lives right on the other side of this wall. And they're all separated by only—how thick are walls? well—inches. Sure, their dorms and apartments are like that too, but it's… it's a different feel. The palace feels like a home while his past dorm and his current apartment just feel… temporary. At least they have—well, Willie called it a mudroom at his house in LA, but it's more like an entryway here, so—an entryway that keeps people walking by from peeking into their chambers, which, like, small victories.

Okay.

Wait.

He needs to stop.

Listen, he's not complaining about living in a palace. Not by any means. It's just. It's taking some adjustments to get used to. He will, he's sure of it, it's just hard when he's only here twelve weeks out of the entire year.

He slips his key into the lock and twists, pushes the door open, and goes inside, locking it behind him. He knows Alex is already home because it's a Saturday and he had told Willie he was just going to be catching up on some work while Willie was at the skatepark. When he gets inside the door he toes his shoes off and sets his skateboard against the wall and steps through to the foyer. From where he stands he can see Alex sitting in the far back corner of the office through the archway, and he grins. "Hey, hot dog," he calls.

Alex turns around, eyes widened in slight surprise. When his eyes land on Willie his spins the computer chair around and stands up, walking towards him. "Hey, puka," he says, giving him a kiss as he reaches him. Willie supposes 'puka' is a more fitting nickname than 'hot dog' since Willie still occasionally wears his puka necklace, meanwhile Alex hasn't had any hot dog related occurrences in nearly five years. Maybe Willie should orchestrate a scenario. "You have good timing. I just finished up with the long term planning forecast."

Willie hums. "So you're mine for the rest of the day."

"I am."

"Wanna drive down to Gabrea?" Gabrea was a small town near the border, about thirty minutes south of Ascela, that had a typical small town feel. Well, like, to be fair, much of Beasiga had a small town feel except for like, three bigger cities. And the bigger cities were similar to what suburbs were in America. Downtown Ascela was most like a true US city, and it was the only city in Beasiga with any buildings over ten stories, and even then there were still only a few. Austere Tower, their tallest building in Ascela, was forty-two floors. So, yeah, like… most of Beasiga has a small town feel, but like, Gabrea is one where it is like, cute and cozy. There's a lake, a few smaller duck ponds, gazebos, parks where people are playing with their kids and dogs, and streets lined with store fronts so you can go window shopping. It's an atmosphere that Willie never really got to experience growing up and he quickly fell in love with the first time Louisa took them.

Alex smiles. Willie holds himself back from kissing Alex because like, god, whenever Alex smiles he's just reminded how absolutely gone on this dude he is but like… okay, if he kissed Alex every time he smiled, their days would be a lot less productive. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing—maybe? Then again, maybe it is. That's something that can be debated and they'll never have a true answer to because, well, two sides, right? But—"That sounds nice, yeah," Alex says. "I've just gotta get dressed."

"Yeah, I've gotta change, too," Willie says, "I don't wanna go in my torn up skateboarding clothes."

So they head back to their bedroom together and step into their laughably large walk-in closet. It's also laughably bare because they have the bare minimum with them since they both leave as much as they can at their apartments at Stanford and Berkley so they don't have as much to drag back and forth. This at least makes it easy for them to pick out their clothes for the day. Willie watches as Alex heads for the pants and goes for a pair of light wash jean shorts and Willie asks him to hand him his black shorts. Alex tosses them over and when he sees Willie sorting through the dresser for his shirt, asks for his light pink Under Armour shirt. Willie pulls it out and hands it to Alex as he walks up behind him. Alex accepts it and presses a kiss to his shoulder in thanks. Willie grabs a teal shirt for himself and they change quickly and toss their old clothes in the hamper in the corner of the closet.

"Ready?" Alex asks.

"Yeah."

It only takes them a minute to get their shoes on once they reach the door, and then Alex is grabbing a set of keys—this particular set has a key to their chambers, a key to the back entrance of the palace, a key to the palace garage, and the keys to Alex's SUV. Alex opens the door for Willie and smiles. Willie thinks god I'm gone on him. This time, he does kiss him. Alex presses back for a moment and then pulls away.

"Let's go," Alex says and then they step out into the hallway, leaving their home behind.

-

year 3:

Water splashes around as it beats against the chickpeas and Alex swirls the strainer, tossing the chickpeas around, cleaning them off as best he can. After twenty seconds of rinsing, he shuts the water off and tosses them a few times, trying to get rid of the excess water. Then he takes the strainer and walks over to stands behind Willie. He wraps his free arm around Willie's waist from behind and rests his chin on his shoulder, watching as Willie stirs the onions, ginger, and garlic in the olive oil. "Ready for the chickpeas?"

"Yeah," Willie says, tilting his head back to peck a kiss to Alex's cheek. Alex returns the kiss by giving Willie one on the neck, and then pulls Willie back into him with the arm wrapped around his waist, and reaches his other arm forward to dump the chickpeas into the pan. He releases his hold on Willie and moves back to the sink to deposit the strainer and then turns to watch as Willie pours more olive oil in and stirs the chickpeas around before leaving them to settle and cook. He turns to Alex. "What's on the schedule for this week?"

Alex leans back against the counter and crosses his arms. "Audience with Jeffry on Wednesday, typical, and a few others throughout the week, but I'd have to check and see when," he says. It's Sunday, so he's mainly focused on tomorrow. There aren't any audiences tomorrow thankfully because audiences tend to be early in the morning and, while that isn't necessarily a hardship, it's always nice to sleep in a little bit. "Policy meetings, mostly. A meeting on Tuesday with the Directorate of Education. And we have that event at—"

"At Austere Tower on Thursday, I know. I'm picking up our suits tomorrow."

"Right," Alex says, then holds his arms open. Willie immediately walks into them and Alex folds them around Willie. "What will you be doing?"

Willie hums and Alex feels it vibrate in his chest. "I have a video meeting with my professor tomorrow—we're talking about our paper and the sources I sent her last week."

"She's the one you published your paper with your sophomore year, right?"

"Yeah, the one where I wrote a paper for her class and she asked if I'd want to write it on a larger scale with her to be published."

"Is she going to be your advisor for grad school?"

"She's in the clinical psych department so if I get in there's a possibility," Willie nods.

Alex wants to scoff at the if I get in, but he knows Willie is anxious about it. Alex may have all the faith in the world when it comes to Willie, but Willie, despite all his confidence, still has his insecurities. Even though he's excelled at school ever since he's received accommodations for his ADHD, the negative comments that he got from teachers in elementary school affected him deeper than he's willing to admit. So Alex lets it go. "What else do you have this week?"

"I have a meeting with the Beasiga Preservation Project on Tuesday and I'm volunteering at Descendants of Beasiga on Wednesday. Then the party on Thursday and I'll probably use Friday to do research for the paper."

Alex hugs Willie tighter to his chest and then releases him. Willie moves back to the stove and takes the can of coconut milk and dumps it into the pan, and then pours in the vegetable broth. Alex comes up behind him again and reaches up to the cabinet for the spices.

"You could say excuse me," Willie says with a small laugh as he crowds closer to the stove to give Alex room.

Alex slips the arm that's not reaching for the spices around Willie's waist and turns his head to look at him. "I like this better," he admits. He grabs the turmeric and curry and brings them down, laughing as Willie pushes back forcing Alex to take a step back. He keeps his arm around Willie's waist and draws him back with him and presses a kiss to the top of his shoulder. "You're gonna make me drop the turmeric."

"Maybe you should have thought about that," Willie teases. He reaches down and grabs the hand that's resting on his waist and grabs it to bring it up to his face so he can press a kiss against the back of it. "Any loss of turmeric is your own fault."

"Hm." Alex shuffles forward so he's pressed more tightly against Willie's back and leans his head forward so he can see Willie's face. Willie turns towards him and they're only millimeters apart. "I think the blame should at least be fifty-fifty."

"Nah, dude, I'm not taking the blame for this one," he says, squeezing Alex's hand. He tilts his chin forward and that's all it takes to connect their lips. It's a soft, gentle kiss that doesn't really go anywhere—doesn't have any purpose beyond the absolute feeling of love that comes along with kissing Willie. It's nice and Alex is really enjoying it until Willie jerks away. He blinks. Willie takes a step away from him and he sways forward and has to stumble to join Willie at the stove because Willie is still holding onto his hand. "I will however split blame fifty-fifty if we burn lunch. Gimme the spices."

Alex hands over the curry and turmeric and thinks.

Huh.

They need to stop kissing when they make food.

-

year 4:

"Hello," Alex murmurs.

What the fuck.

"Shit," Willie swears and jumps, but Alex has come up right behind him and wrapped his arms around Willie so Willie doesn't go too far. Alex leans down and presses a kiss to his neck, right over his pulse point where he must be able to feel Willie's heart racing because, like Willie said, what the fuck. Willie turns his head towards Alex. "Hi," he breathes, still recovering from being spooked. "What the fuck."

"Spain cancelled our meeting so I finished the day early," he murmurs, lips still pressed against Willie's skin. Okay, he can like, maybe forgive Alex for scaring him if he just keeps kissing him like that. Alex draws back an inch. Is he fucking kidding? Literally what did Willie just say? "Wanted to surprise you—didn't mean to scare you." He kisses his skin again. Oh, thank fuck.

Willie reaches up and cards his fingers through Alex's hair and massages his scalp. He looks down at the dough and the half finished cookie sheet in front of him and swears at his put his hands on Alex reflex because now he's going to have to wash his hands. "Okay. I was going to make you cookies."

There's a long pause. Then a small, "you were?"

"Yeah. You've had a long week."

"Thank you." Alex sounds so surprised that anyone would do this for him that it's—it's—ridiculous. Alex deserves the world, okay? He deserves someone to make him cookies even if he hasn't had a long week. All right, ignore the fact that he's Prince and he has an entire kitchen staff that will make him cookies. Willie means like, in a loving, supportive way. So maybe Willie should start making Alex cookies more often? Because he loves and supports Alex always. Not just during his long weeks. But then what will he do during his long weeks to show he extra loves and supports him? God, being with Alex is the easiest thing in the world until he starts to over think how relationships are supposed to work. Then he gets a glimpse at how Alex's anxiety must feel.

He drops his hand from Alex's hair and spins in his hold. Alex leans away from him so they don't bump heads, but when Willie is facing him, he immediately goes for a kiss. Willie kisses back but as he does, he reaches up and slips his hands under the shoulders of Alex's jacket, pushing at it until it begins to slide down his arms. Alex rolls his shoulders back and shifts his arms so the jacket can fall freely, and Willie catches it before it can hit the ground. He kinda feels like a badass with those reflexes. They pull away from each other reluctantly; neither of them really wants to part but both of them know that now isn't the best moment to keep going. Willie reaches up and loosens Alex's tie next and undoes the top button of his shirt, and Alex's shoulders relax, like coming out of his self-appointed uniform finally allows him to breathe again. He lets Alex undo his own wrist cuffs, and watches as he rolls them up his forearms. Willie moves over to the sink as he does that and washes his hands.

When he's done, he turns around and finds Alex has tossed his jacket onto the breakfast bar and hopped up to sit on the counter. What a fucking sight. God, Willie would be a fucking chef if this were what every kitchen looked like. He makes quick work of the rest of the dough, feeling particularly motivated, and they make small conversation as he does it. It feels so normal and it's moments like these that make it so easy to forget they're living in a palace, and Alex is a Prince, and Willie is going to be married to a King one day. So, fuck it. He lets himself forget because all that fucking matters is him and Alex, right? Well, and these cookies, because even though they were relatively straightforward he, like, put a lot of work into them.

Once they're in the oven, he sees Alex start to slide off the counter but Willie holds up a hand. Alex freezes. Good. "No," Willie says, and walks over to him. "You're going to stay there, and I'm going to stay here, because I want to kiss you, and if I kiss you anywhere else, then these cookies are going to burn."

Alex tosses his head back and laughs but like, how is that fucking funny? Willie really wants to kiss him, okay? He's sitting here in a button up with the sleeves rolled up, he's on the counter looking fucking adorable, and like, if Willie's being honest, he kind of always wants to kiss Alex. And, like, he doesn't need to justify it. He's pretty sure there are plenty of other people who also frequently think about kissing Alex, Willie is just the only one who a) knows what it's like (Luke doesn't count) and b) is allowed to, so he obviously thinks about it more.

He doesn't wait for Alex to stop laughing, just thinks: an eye for a fucking eye, and steps forward between Alex's legs, grabs his tie, and kisses his neck. Alex's laughter dies off quick and his hands fly to Willie's waist, pulling him in closer. Willie smirks against his skin and trails his lips up Alex's neck until he reaches his jaw and then Alex jerks his head away and moves his head back so he can reach Willie's lips with his. They meet each other halfway and Willie twists the hand holding Alex's tie to reel him in closer, and then brings his other hand up to Alex's face to trace his fingers over his skin. Alex hums at the touch and Willie pushes further into the kiss, deepening it, and it carries on and on and on and even though they're no less than five feet away from the cookies, they still almost burn because when the timer goes off, Willie can barely find the willpower to pull himself away.

There should probably be a rule about kissing while they're making food, but Willie sure as hell isn't going to be the one to put it in place.

-

year 5:

Alex walks into their room and sees Willie sitting in their bed, hair tied up in a bun, pencil behind one ear, pen behind the other, highlighter in his hand, laptop at his side, and papers in his lap. Yeah. It's dissertation time.

Willie has been home for six weeks at this point, but Alex feels like he's barely seen him. Well, that's not entirely true. He's definitely seen Willie and Willie has very pointedly made time for Alex, but there's a distinct difference between their time together this summer and in summers' past. He's not like—he's not mad about it. A little sad, yeah, because it's Willie and he wants to spend time with him, but he does understand. Willie may be starting his dissertation earlier than most, but his interviews are also going to take months or a year to conduct even though he's already started on them. He's also already deep into his research, which Alex assumes is what he's doing now.

He manages to get into the master bathroom without Willie taking notice of him, and as he gets ready for bed he thinks back to the last year—the progress of Willie's dissertation. Last summer he'd asked a few visiting diplomats about their willingness to participate in a survey and-slash-or interview. When he received overwhelmingly positive responses, he decided to move forward with his chosen topic. He'd proposed it to his advisor at the end of fall semester and by the start of spring semester had received his approval. Since then he'd been gathering academic texts and over the summer he's been reviewing them. He's been gathering as many participants for interviews as he can since January—calling in favors from Alex and his grandmother for their help to get them to ask as many diplomats as they could. Surprisingly, most agreed. It made sense: Beasiga was small and dramaless and that made them very well liked by everyone they had regular contact with, and well respected by everyone else, even when there were radically differing opinions involved. But even then, most diplomats wanted to stay on good terms and when hearing diplomats from other countries had agreed to be surveyed, they also agreed. From there it was a matter of Willie finding resources at Berkeley to translate his questionnaires into each of their native languages, and then sending them off. He'll still have to conduct phone and video interviews with those who are willing, but it is a start.

Alex slips his toothbrush back into the holder and wipes his face with a towel, and then heads back out to their bedroom. He's not sure if he makes a noise, but somehow Willie finally notices him. "Oh," he looks up from the text he's reading. "You're going to bed? Do you want me to—"

"No," Alex says as he walks over to his side of the bed. He pulls the covers back and climbs in. "You can leave the light on as long as you want."

Willie frowns. "Are you sure?"

"I'm positive," Alex says, leaning over for a kiss. Willie leans in for a short kiss, but before he can pull back, Alex reaches a hand up to catch his face and hold him there, kissing him deeper and longer. Willie melts into him and Alex traces his hand down until it's curled around Willie's neck, then traces his thumb over his jaw. He pulls away. "Remember Ava's nightmares?" Willie's face lights up with realization. Ava used to come to Alex's room after nightmares to sleep with him, but they'd have to sleep with the light on. "I've got some experience sleeping with the light on."

"Still, I can go in the office—"

"You look comfortable here," Alex says. He draws Willie in for another kiss. "Stay. I only get to fall asleep next to you so many nights out of the year, don't take one away from me."

Willie rolls his eyes dramatically and holds his hands up, highlighter still in one. "Alright, fine, fine, you've convinced me, the light stays on."

"Oh thank god, I thought this was the breaking point of our relationship."

"It very well could have been."

Alex sinks down into the bed. "Reading anything interesting?"

Willie absolutely lights up. "Not reading, evaluating—" Willie goes on to tell Alex all about descriptive statistics and p-values and t-scores and samples and Alex listens to him until Willie stops himself and shakes his head. "You—you probably don't—"

"No, I—"

"You don't need to—"

"Willie. Literally anything you're excited about is exciting to me. I may not understand it all, but I know it's worth listening to."

Willie smiles down at him. He leans down and presses a kiss against Alex's hair. Alex hums and juts his chin up, seeking a kiss on the lips. Willie complies. "Still, I'll let you sleep now. Love you."

"Love you," Alex says back, and turns on his side to face Willie. He doesn't even care that he's turning to face the light, he just reaches a hand out to rest on Willie's thigh and slowly, slowly drifts to sleep.

-

year 6:

"I don't—"

"Does it—"

"I'm not—"

"Does—"

"I—"

"Does it spark joy or not, Alex?"

"No!"

Fucking finally. Willie tosses the shirt to the side. "Good, now was that so hard?"

Alex looks like he wants to pull his hair out. "Yes!"

He rolls his eyes and steps forward and curls a hand around Alex's neck. "Well maybe if you hadn't accumulated so much shit in the year that you've lived here permanently then we wouldn't have to be doing this."

Alex frowns and glances over at where the clothes hang. "It's not that much…"

Willie raises his eyebrows. He did not just fucking say that. Willie walks over and pushes at one end of the clothes until the other end meets the wall and they stop moving. There's about an inch of space between Willie's hand and the wall. "Alex, I can't fit my two suitcases of clothes in our walk in closet."

Alex mumbles something.

"Sorry, what was that?"

"Companies like sending me stuff," he says, louder this time.

"Well tell the companies to fuck off," Willie laughs, tearing another shirt off a hanger. "Does this spark—"

"Oh my god." Alex drops to the floor and pulls his knees to his chest. He rests his elbows on top of his knees and puts his head in his hands and stares up at Willie with wide eyes.

Willie giggles and drops his hands. Alex looks entirely done with Willie but in like, an adorable way where he looks like he wants to shut him up with his lips. Willie's considering keeping it up to see if he can push Alex to that point, but also like, he doesn't want to live out of his suit cases while he's here and he knows that if Alex gets the idea to shut him up with kisses they'll never get anything done. It fucking sucks being the responsible one. Yeah, yeah, so he's in grad school, so he's going to be a therapist and contribute to people's mental health but that's like… outside of his relationship. Alex is supposed to be the responsible one in the relationship. You know, like when they go to the store and Willie sees a sleeping bag with pants and reaches for it—even though a) they don't camp so they don't need sleeping bags and b) even if they did need sleeping bags they wouldn't need them with pants—Alex is there to tell him no. It works for them. It's good for them.

It's fucking hard when it's the other way around.

He wants to ask how Alex does this all the time, but he thinks that would derail the conversation, or worse, it would make Alex feel guilty and then he'd start getting rid of clothes left and right—including clothes he genuinely liked. So Willie remains responsible. Remains strong. Remains… remains… okay, he didn't think of another word to follow that. But the point is, he toughs it out and lifts the shirt back up. He looks down at Alex and softens his face, but keeps his voice firm. "If I threw this shirt out today and didn't tell you would you notice?"

"… probably not."

Willie tosses the shirt to the side.

Alex raises a hand, holding one finger up, and scrunches up his face. Willie pauses. "Okay, but to be fair, I don't think I'd notice if you got rid of the majority of these things."

Willie groans and lets his head fall back. "That's the point of them sparking joy! Do you like them or not!"

"I don't know if I like them!"

"I'd say if you're not sure if you like it, you probably don't like it!"

"… you… you're… you're probably right."

Fucking finally. "Right. Alright." He turns, rips a shirt off the hanger. "Does this spark joy?"

"No."

Yes! A breakthrough! Incredible! "I'm so fucking proud of you," Willie grins, tossing the shirt to the side and crossing the room to where Alex is. He drops to his knees next to him and leans forward to kiss Alex. Alex grabs hold of Willie reflexively and kisses back and Willie can feel him shaking with laughter. He pulls back. "What?"

"Just—we're not going to get through this very quickly if you kiss me every time I make a decision."

"Fair point," Willie says because like, well. Fair point.

He moves back to the rack and tugs at another shirt.

After two more hours of this, they've downsized Alex's closet considerably, and Willie thinks that, if Alex can maintain this level, Willie will actually be able to fit his full wardrobe in when he moves to Beasiga full time in two years. Of course, if companies keep sending him clothes that might not happen. But… maybe they can make a deal where, for every piece of clothing he decides to keep from a package, he gets rid of another. That… could work. He hopes it does.

Alex looks at the two piles of clothes on the ground—one to be donated, and one to be kept. Then he looks back at Willie. "You… do realize we have to put these—" he points to the keep pile "—back now."

Willie looks at the pile, looks at Alex, and drops to the ground. "Fuck."

-

year 7:

"Do you have the towel under the door?" Alex calls.

"We're good!"

Alex flicks the opening to the cage and Mac and Cheese immediately climb into his hand. He grins down at them and brings the hand that opened the door down to give them more surface area to climb on and turns around. Willie approaches and holds a hand out. "Take your son," Alex tells him, nodding at the rat who is trying to crawl in his sleeve. "He's already being a pain."

"Oh, my son," Willie scoffs. Still he pries Mac from Alex's wrist and takes him over to the open area behind the couch.

"Like you don't refer to Cheese as my daughter nine times out of ten. I only call Mac yours when he tries to get in my shirt."

"Cheese clearly takes after you."

"Cheese can do no wrong," Alex says. He follows Willie, grabbing a few toys for the rats as he goes, and takes a seat on the ground so he can lower Cheese until she's level with the floor. She climbs off Alex's hand and sniffs the ground as she begins to explore.

"Cheese eats her own shit."

"Ignoring the implication that I eat my own shit, so does Thea and you let her lick your face."

"Thea's a puppy."

"Thea is two! Cheese is younger than her!"

Willie shakes his head. "You should teach her better."

Alex rolls his eyes and watches as Mac and Cheese roam around on the floor, stopping occasionally when one of the toys piques their interest. The two rats came home at the beginning of summer at seven months old already spayed and neutered. This was after a few months of research on Alex's part and an agreement on Willie's part—because Alex wanted a pet, but he didn't want a dog, not without Willie. He had expected to like them, but he hadn't expected to love them as much as he did. He didn't think Willie expected to love them as much as he did either. They just have so much personality—they're like dogs in really, really small packaging.

"So… You've been King for a full week now," Willie says. Alex looks away from Mac and Cheese and up at Willie. Willie is staring at him with a curious expression on his face. So. They're talking about this now. Alex looks back to the rats. "How's it been?"

"Oh, great," Alex huffs. Mac startles at his puff of air and looks up at him. Alex murmurs an apology. He shakes his head, thinking back to the past week, because, well. Willie knows how it's been, but Alex hasn't put it into words for him yet. "You know, I knew I was ready, right? And I… I was. I am. But… opening Parliament was fucking weird. Meeting with Ukraine was terrifying without Grandma by my side. And like, it wasn't even that I was worried I couldn't do it. I knew I could! I—I knew I could do it, it's just. She's been there all along and it's. It felt like something was missing. I felt like I was forgetting something. Like I forgot something important. Like I was doing something wrong. But really, it was just that my Grandma wasn't next to me." He grimaces and looks to Willie again. "That… that sounds pathetic doesn't it?"

"No," Willie shakes his head. "It's not pathetic, that's completely understandable. It's what you're used to. It's going to take time to adjust." Mac wanders over to Alex's hand that's resting on the floor and Willie watches as Alex lifts his hand to wrestle gently with the cream colored rat. He continues, "Getting through the first week without her was a great first step. I'm sure moving forward it'll get easier. And hey—next year I'll even be able to join you sometimes. I know I'm no Louisa, but maybe that will help."

Alex glances up from his wrestling match with Mac and grins. He thinks of sitting in a meeting and looking to his left and seeing Willie there. He thinks of opening Parliament and not being alone as he does so. He thinks of meeting with foreign dignitaries and having Willie beside him as a calming presence. He thinks of having Willie by his side, ready to catch him should he fall, just like his grandmother had been. It wouldn't be the same, but… "Yeah," he says. "I think it will."

-

year 8:

"Hey, did you feed Mac and Cheese?" Alex's voice calls from the living room.

"Yes!" Willie calls as he pulls a brush through his hair.

It's quiet for a few seconds and then: "Cheese says you didn't!"

"Cheese is a filthy fucking liar!"

"You take that back!"

"Not until she admits I fed them!"

More silence. "She says you didn't give them any treats!"

"… She may have some valid points."

"Her own father!"

"Mac would never rat me out like this!"

More silence. Then, right behind him, "he would if you keep using that fucking pun."

Willie jumps and spins around, dropping the brush in his hand. "Fuck," he hisses. "Make a fucking noise." He notices Mac on one of Alex's shoulders and Cheese on the other. Without a second's hesitation he reaches for Mac.

"You know, if you have this much preference for one of our human children we're going to have a problem." Alex reaches a hand up and plucks Cheese off his other shoulder and she immediately crawls up his arm again, meanwhile Mac is calmly nestled in Willie's hand.

"Cheese bit me! Like, right off the bat. Didn't even get to know me, just—fucking went for it."

"Yeah, and one of our kids might, too! Or piss or shit on you!"

"Yeah, but—"

"—but they're our children," Alex finishes in a lofty, mocking voice. He rolls his eyes at Willie teasingly. "Cheese is your child too."

"And I love her. Sometimes."

Alex scoffs. "Give me Mac, I'm going to give them some treats."

Alex reaches forward and the light catches off the ring on his left ring finger and Willie—oh how he fucking grins. He passes Mac off to his husband and bends down to pick up the brush, turns back to the mirror, and finishes brushing his hair before pulling it up into a bun. Their wedding had been two weeks ago and, while they haven't been able to go on a honeymoon yet—well, except a two day getaway to Gire, a Northern Beasigan town with amazing hiking trails—because of Alex's schedule, married life is… good? Honestly, it isn't really any different than dating or engaged life, except there is a difference now: it is September now. It is September now and Willie is still in Beasiga. And isn't that fucking amazing?

For seven years now, eight if you counted the first year when he only spent four weeks here, he got to spend the summer in Beasiga before school reared its head and called him back. And, okay, so he didn't regret going to college and grad school. He's in the process of opening up his own practice in downtown Ascela which… holy shit. Holy shit, right? Who would have thought? But, like, god was he ready to start his life with Alex. The taste of it every summer and winter tided him over but—but he was here to stay and that felt so fucking good.

He is here to stay in the home that embraced him in ways that nowhere else had since he established himself here with Alex, since he made this place home. He gets to stay in the place that he always used to long for when he was away, that he always used to feel homesick for, even when he was at the place he had called home for the first eighteen years of his life. He's going to stay here and make new memories with Alex, with the rest of his family in Beasiga, to build upon all the memories he's already created. He's fucking here to stay and it's fucking incredible.

So like, being married was awesome, but being here, being home with Alex, was the best.