Actions

Work Header

Revenge bitch.

Summary:

Technoblade gets revenge on Birdza and Enderboo ;)

Notes:

This took a long time to make for many reasons, I am very sorry!! :[

From no motivation to getting distracted by DreamNap stories to figuring out how to fucking tease an enderman boy and a bird dad, shits kinda hard.

Also now that I look at it, my writing changes just a bit throughout the story, sorry. From reading many, many other stories written by amazing artists, I tend to pick up writing styles subconsciously.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

As the sun was just barely waking up, Techno was wide awake and has been for at least an hour. He had so much planned for his neighbors. For the past weeks they've been seeing what else the wonderous cat-boy Techno can do.

Now Techno may be a little evil. But he's not outright traumatizing evil, unlike someone else we know, Dream

But! Techno does want to get revenge on Philza and Ranboo, also known as for the day, Birdza and Enderboo...


The day started normally, the sun was all high and mighty, and there were very few clouds scattered throughout the sky. Ranboo was up around 7 AM, while Philza awoke a little later, but it's okay because he's old. Ranboo needed some fish to feed Enderchest, so he went to go look for Technoblade, knowing that besides himself, Techno would be awake in the Tundra.

Right before Ranboo could knock on Techno's door, he was pulled inside and dropped onto a seat. Confused as hell, he looked around until he locked eyes with Techno, who was smiling sadistically. "Hello Enderboo, so glad you could join us." He spoke methodically and sinisterly. Soon a whistle was to be heard, Ranboo turned his head to see Phil, sitting next to him. "Birdza! and Enderboo! We're going to have so much fun today my friends!"

Technoblade's plan was simple and surely wouldn't last the whole day. Of course not. But it would last a least a few hours.

"Now, my friends. We have a busy day today. I think you both know what this is about.." He trailed off, leaving his friends scared for their dignity. He knew a few things about both men, sitting in front of him. He knew Phil couldn't see glass very well, a reason why he always has trapdoors or fences as windows, and that he liked seeds, quite a bit, and he knew that Ranboo can meow like a cat when he's afraid or shocked. Then denies it. What Techno wanted to do was to see if Phil liked to eat seeds, just like parrots and if Ranboo can get afraid if you show him some..body sprays...

If you are wondering, he does know that Ranboo is afraid of water, and so he will not torture his friend with it.

"Philza! My friend, my comrade! You're first, bird." Technoblade took out a handful of random seeds. All assorted from wheat to grass seeds. Phil stared at the piglin-hybrid. "What is this, mate?"

Techno laughed and continued smiling, staring at the bird-hybrid, he slowly turned his hand sideways, in the process turning his hand into a fist full of seeds. Staring cautiously, Philza stayed quiet. Eyeing the seed-filled hand. His wings slowly started to flutter in anticipation. Eyes widening at the pinky finger that bounced off of his palm. Just one more finger and all the seeds would fall to the floor. Damnit. That was his plan. To see if he'll dive down and eat them. Smart bastard.

In the background, Ranboo was staring at them both. If this is what Philza is getting, what will he be getting? Nonetheless, pushing that thought into the back of his mind, he watched closely.

Technoblade's hand started to open up more, soon, small seeds fell to the floor. Philza watched with an ever-growing urge to eat the seeds. Glancing up at Techno, who was smiling evilly, he furrowed his eyebrows with embarrassment. "I am not-" He spoke before Techno's whole hand opened up, all the seeds falling. It felt like hours to see them fall when in reality, it was less than 2 seconds.

Philza looked back at Ranboo, "Look away kid," Ranboo nodded and turned his whole body around. As soon as he did so, Philza looked up to the piglin-hybrid. "Fuck you mate." He swooped down to grab the seeds and ate them. Cooing happily as he ate them.

He really is part bird, huh? Techno thought as he smiled. Once Philza was done, and very much embarrassed, Ranboo was told to turn back around. Thankfully for Philza, Ranboo had no clue what had happened 10 seconds ago. But, what he did know was that it was now his turn..and Techno had a sadistic look on his face.

"Now, enderboy, some little mice told me you had once meowed..? Due to a statement of you wearing Axe Body Spray?" Ranboo's face immediately turned into embarrassed regret. He quickly shook his head as Techno continued to speak. "So..do you? Or do you use Old Spice? Perhaps you use Bath and Body Works!" Ranboo felt himself wanting to whine in disgust. Not in god's name would he use those. Specifically men's Bath and Body Works. Not to hate on the brand, he just very much disliked the way they made men's anything.

Shaking his head, he stared at Techno who was pulling out something from behind him. "W-what is that Techno-" Ranboo stuttered out, watching Techno's hand slowly come into his point of view, holding...body sprays...

Ranboo's eyes widened as his voice started to give out. Small frightening meow-ish whines were being emitted. Technoblade's face lit up in excitement while Philza stood there, confused as hell. Ranboo continued to whine as flashbacks flew through his mind of that fateful day. He got called a catboy for weeks after that. Well, he always gets called a catboy, as well as dogboy and many others.

He huffed and looked down at Technoblade, who was, not surprisingly, enjoying this way more than Ranboo. Not even a few minutes later, Ranboo let out a very loud and aggressive meow that just made Philza and Technoblade fall to the ground cackling. Ranboo felt his cheeks heat up in embarrassment, then soon started to chuckle as he watched the two men die on the floor laughing.

Philza was the one to gain back his composure, smiling he looked at both laughing men. "I hate you both, I'm too old for this shit, goodnight Ranboo, Technoblade" Philza spat out Techno's name with lighthearted hatred. Soon coming down from their laughing fits, Techno and Ranboo both said goodnight to the old man, then soon said goodnight to each other.

Before leaving, Ranboo stared Technoblade down, smirking evilly. "You tell anyone about this, I'll spill about you purring in your sleep. Alright, goodnight Tech!" Technoblade was just a little bit intimidated by Ranboo but nodded nonetheless. "Goodnight to you too Enderboy"

Notes:

Finally finished!!!
Sooo sorry it took so long! Hope you guys like the last part of the Technoblade cat series!
Thank you all for all the kudos to the series, it means a lot to me!

Thank you for reading and feel free to leave comments! I reply to almost all of them!! (depends if they're weird or not)

04-07 edit: I was sleep-deprived when I posted the story so I definitely did not do any editing, so now it's fixed!
D:
Really sucks when the beginning doesn't match with the end!

Series this work belongs to: