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To describe Himawari's feelings as plain uneasiness was straight-up belittlement to the real turmoil that was keeping her awake for the past few days. She knows she shouldn't feel this way. It was only a rumor anyway. She should feel happy, relieved. Especially now that her father went out of his way to spend time with her and specifically teaching her the secrets and tricks of the Rasengan.
But the rumors she heard last week was messing up her head. As a child, Himawari always believed in her parent's love. But as she grew up and began to understand the notion of relationships, she was starting to doubt everything. And the last straw was that troublesome rumor she heard from her classmates.
"Himawari-chan! Did you know that Nanadaime-sama was in love with Sakura-san when they were still young? Don't you think they'd be a perfect match if they ended up together?!"
"I agree with you Haruki-kun! Sakura-san is so strong! She'd really complement Nanadaime-sama! Just imagining the both of them really excites me! They'd be the power couple of Konoha!"
"Ah..."
They were resting now under a tree but Naruto couldn't help but notice the silence of his little princess. He knew instantly that something was bothering her.
"Hima? Are you okay?"
The young Uzumaki froze but quickly smiled at her father. She doesn't want him to worry. He has a lot of things to worry about the village already and she doesn't want a simple rumor to add to his list.
"I'm okay, Papa!"
The Seventh Hokage knows his daughter was far from okay. He noticed how she wasn't her usual self these past few days. She wasn't smiling as much to him and worse, she couldn't even hold her gaze at him for five seconds! And if that wasn't an indication that something was wrong with her, Naruto don't know what is right anymore.
"Hmm... Papa still thinks you're not okay though. You know, you can tell me anything and I will do my best to help you!"
It hurt seeing her father's wide and innocent smile. It was wrong to doubt his love for his mother. But if the rumor was somehow true, then Himawari needed to know. She needs to know if her Papa was just pretending to love them. She needs to know if her Papa still yearns for her Aunt Sakura. She needs to know if it's possible to build a family even without love.
The distant memory of her on her father's shoulder seemed fake now. She recalled all the moments where her father called her Aunt 'Sakura-chan!' and how he called her mother with a plain 'Hinata.' What if he really was just pretending? What if he just did that because he felt sorry for her and her mother? What if everything she knew and understand about him was a lie?
"Hima?! Himawari?! Why are you crying? Are you hurt? Is your hand injured?!"
Naruto's mind and chest was warped in panic. His precious little girl was crying and he didn't know why! He began to think that maybe his training wasn't appropriate for her small body. Or maybe her hand hurt but she decided to hide it from him. Regardless of what it was, Naruto knows he needed to know what made her cry and get to the bottom of all of these.
He quickly enveloped her in an embrace, her face buried into his chest. Naruto hopes doing this would be enough to ease her crying. But it didn't. Himawari sobbed even more. And it pained his heart. A pain that was greater than the pain he felt when he lost his right arm.
"Hima...? Can you tell Tou-chan what's wrong?"
Himawari hitched her breath as she clinged in his chest. The faster she's going to tell him the quicker the pain will go away. But will it really go away?
"Papa..."
"Hmm?"
"Papa... Do you still l-love Sakura-san? More than Mama?"
Huh?! Naruto furrowed his eyebrows at Himawari's question and why she would even have the slightest idea that he loves Sakura even more than Hinata?! That ought to be a joke, right?
"Why do you think that Hima?"
Himawari inhaled deeply and mustered her courage to look at her father in the eye.
"Haruki and my other friends... They said that you were deeply in love with Sakura-san back when you were kids until you were teenagers... And they said you look good together... That would mean you really care for her, right? Feelings that last that long... It won't easily go away... And..."
The young girl bit her lip preparing her heart for what she's about to say.
"And these past few days... I'm starting to think that maybe you still do! What if you're just pretending to be happy with us? What if you really want to be with her all this time instead of us?"
Himawari closed her eyes as she knows she should already stop. She knows she's only blurting out hurtful words towards her father. She knows but she couldn't stop her mouth.
"I don't want Papa to be sad... If you want to leave us... I can accept that. What I can't accept is that you're acting like you're happy when you're really not! I just want Papa to keep on smiling even if it means you're going to leave us forever!"
Naruto smiled sadly at Himawari. It burned his insides knowing that the innocence and pureness of his daughter's heart was tainted by the inks of rumors that had no concrete basis. Even if they were just kids, Naruto hated whoever told these things to his little girl.
"Hima..."
The young Uzumaki felt his father's warm hands cup her small face. She was afraid to open her eyes. She was afraid to see her Papa's anger. She was afraid to see the truth in his eyes. But as soon as she fluttered them open, all she saw was love and understanding.
"Papa...?"
"Hima. I need you to listen to me, okay?"
There wasn't any hint of anger on his voice. And Himawari could only nod as the warm liquid kept on streaming down her whiskered cheeks.
"It's true that your Tou-chan was in love with your Aunt Sakura when I was young."
Himawari felt like her heart was ripped in half. She already wants to leave him but she had promised that she'll listen to him.
"Well.. I wouldn't consider what I felt as love. You see, Sakura-chan was the most intelligent and prettiest girl in our class. But she was crazy over your Uncle Sasuke. She was all over him! And you know that your Tou-chan and your Uncle Sasuke are rivals, right? And so... I thought that if maybe I could make her fall in love with me... I would win over Sasuke."
Himawari almost laughed thinking about how petty her father could be back when he was as young as her.
Noticing the brightening on her face, the blonde quickly continued.
"But I was wrong. My conception of love was definitely wrong. Love... Love wasn't supposed to be asked. I realized that I shouldn't beg for love. No. Scratch that. Hinata, your Kaa-chan made me realize that."
Mama? At the mention of her mother, Himawari smiled.
"Hinata patiently loved someone like me even when I was nothing. She believed in me when no one else tried to. She gladly threw her own life for me even when I told everyone to keep themselves out of my way. She always reminded me of my Nindo. She continued to pour all her love to me... Selflessly.. As if I'm the only person that mattered."
Naruto couldn't hide the blush blossoming on his face. Just thinking of everything that Hinata did for him... He knows he didn't deserve it. He didn't deserve all her kindness. All her love. And yet she made him feel like he deserved it. Her gentle warmth always reassuring him everytime his insecurities got the best of him. Her soft smiles that always held him together everytime the world felt too much for him to breathe. Just her. She was enough to make him feel that he exist. Her and their bundles of joy.
"And your dense Tou-chan didn't understood the depth of her love not until I almost lost her to another man. That moment... When she left me all alone out of her desire to save Hanabi... I was really scared. I really thought I lost her forever. But it was also that moment that I finally realized that what I feel for her is truly different from what I felt for your Aunt. Way different, ya know! What I feel for Sakura-chan is similar to the love Boruto has for you. She's like a sister I never had!"
Himawari could only sob lowly as she listened to her father's words. She felt so stupid for letting a rumor control her mind and feelings. She should've done this instead of lamenting it alone.
"If I was born in another life and I was given a chance to love again, I would definitely choose your Kaa-chan over and over again in a heartbeat. Hinata... She's the only one for me. No one else. She showed me love. She granted me happiness. And.. She gave me Boruto and you, Himawari."
Yeah, Himawari should've talked to her father first.
"Papa... I'm sorry! I'm sorry for doubting you! I'm so stupid!"
Naruto only ruffled her dark-blue hair and laughed.
"Now that's a proof that you're the daughter of Naruto Uzumaki, ya know!"
Himawari cried once again but this time, it was out of pure happiness.
"Come on, Hima! It's time to go home! Kaa-chan is waiting for us! I'm going to teach you the Rasengan next time!"
"Yeah!"
"I'm getting hungry too! It's time for..."
"Ramen!"
"Ramen!"
Definitely our daughter! The two Uzumaki then shared an identical toothy grin and made their way home, hand in hand.