Work Text:
“would you just fuck off? jesus christ, hyung, i’m trying to work.”
“jeongguk, you need a break.” yoongi says, placing a gentle, grounding hand on jeongguk’s shoulder.
the day had been grim for the both of them. yoongi woke up at four in the morning to a phone call telling him he had been let go from his job. it wasn’t a big deal at first, the job isn’t that important to him. it’s just– he really liked the job. sitting in a cubicle, doing a little paperwork, minding his own business. it paid decently and provided a safe space for yoongi. he could easily ground himself because of the minimum effort he needed to do it, and it helped his mental health a lot.
when jeongguk and yoongi woke up five hours later, the words, “you’re being let go,” rattled around his head enough to wake up and forget to say good morning to jeongguk and give him a kiss. jeongguk had pouted, trying to pull yoongi back into bed, but yoongi pulled his wrist out of jeongguk’s grip so hard it had startled both of them.
after they both showered, yoongi accidentally dropped jeongguk’s favorite mug. taehyung had given the pink, sparkly mug to jeongguk after a trip to a flea market, and jeongguk was so high when taehyung had given it to him, it retained its watery sentiment when he sobered up.
yoongi didn’t mean to drop it, of course. it was a slip of a shaky hand that had it crashing to the floor. at the noise, jeongguk had come running into the kitchen, ready to do cpr if necessary, only to find his favorite mug shattered on the floor.
“fuck, i’m sorry, fuck. my hands are shaking so much, jeongguk-ah, fuck. hyung’s sorry.” yoongi had said, eyes wide and desperate.
jeongguk had stared back, eyes equally as wide and full of light anger. he had sighed imperceptibly and gritted his teeth, letting out a sad, “it’s fine, hyung. don’t forget your meds.”
when the afternoon came, yoongi found the door to the apartment left slightly open. he had laughed fondly to himself, knowing that jeongguk sometimes forgets to close the door when he leaves. he walked over to the door to close it just as a disheveled jeongguk came running out of their guest bedroom.
“baby, what’s wrong?” yoongi asked, looking at jeongguk’s frantic state.
“i, um–” jeongguk bounces back and forth on his feet, nervous energy radiating off of him. “i– hyung i just–”
yoongi nodded, a silent cue to continue, that he was listening.
“i– yoongi i went to go take holly for his walk and i– he–”
“you lost holly?” yoongi nearly yells, his tone making jeongguk wince.
“it was an accident! i didn’t do it on purpose! he literally slipped out of his harness!” jeongguk pleaded, held up holly’s leash and collar to prove it.
“well obviously you didn’t put it on fucking tight enough.” yoongi sneered, grabbing his keys off of the counter.
jeongguk was left shaking in the hallway, tears falling down his face. yoongi had come home with holly an hour later and placed holly in jeongguk’s lap. he reassured jeongguk that it was fine, it’s alright. he didn’t mean to get angry and snap like that and he’s sorry.
jeongguk had nodded and said sorry again, but yoongi had shaken his head and said there’s nothing to apologize for. still, the scar is still there. the imprint of yoongi snarling at jeongguk with a raised voice is stuck in his head.
when dinner time rolled around, jeongguk had been working on coursework for at least two and a half hours, yoongi had been mixing music for three, and they were both too worn out to pick dinner.
“i don’t know, what do you want?” jeongguk asked quietly, copying his notes down neatly.
“just pick something, i’ll eat whatever.” yoongi sighed from his place in front of the fridge.
“let’s just eat in, then.”
“we have nothing here, jeongguk-ah.” yoongi tutted impatiently.
“you told me to pick, i picked.” jeongguk snapped.
“and i’m telling you we have no food. pick something else.” yoongi says.
“i’ll find something here, yoongi. get whatever, i don’t care. i really need to work, hyung, please leave me alone.” jeongguk dragged his hands through his hair, tired and frustrated. yoongi relented easily, feeling frustrated as well, going back into his makeshift studio with a slam of the door.
now, six hours after dinner, it’s past midnight and jeongguk is still working.
“don’t fucking touch me.” jeongguk winces, pushing yoongi’s hand off of his shoulder. “not like you fucking care, anyway.” he scoffs.
“of course i fucking care!” yoongi shouts. he pulls his anger back in, takes a deep breath. “look, i know it’s been a tough day but–”
“but nothing, yoongi. just– please just fuck off for a few hours so i can get something done.”
“jeongguk-ah,” yoongi says softly. “it’s been over six hours since we last saw each other.”
jeongguk’s head jumps up from the table, eyes wide in surprise. he furrows his eyebrows accusingly at yoongi.
“you’re lying,” he says.
“we last talked at dinner time, right?” jeongguk nods silently.
“it’s past midnight now, baby.” yoongi says, bringing a hand up to jeongguk’s shoulder. he smooths his thumb along the bone there, attempting to ground jeongguk back to reality. “we should go to bed, bun.”
jeongguk softens around the edges at the nickname. he nods, closing his books and standing up, allowing yoongi to pull him by the hand into their bedroom. when they walk in, holly has already made himself comfortable on the bed, right at the end. he lays in a little circle, making jeongguk soften even more.
yoongi helps jeongguk out of his clothes and into some of his softer clothes, ones they call “sensory clothes.” they’re soft enough that both of them can wear them without feeling too suffocated or itchy. they mostly wear them on bad days, keep them washed constantly so they smell like laundry detergent, but they sometimes wear the clothing to bed, needing the extra comfort it provides.
yoongi changes into one of the shirts as well before joining jeongguk in bed. yoongi pulls back the covers and slips himself into bed as softly as possible, not wanting to set jeongguk off.
jeongguk turns over and faces yoongi’s side of the bed. his hands are squished between his face and the pillow as he stares at nothing, eyes unfocusing.
“i hate this,” he says suddenly. “i hate walking on eggshells around you.”
“yeah,” yoongi says. “i do too.”
it takes less than a minute of silence for jeongguk to break down, big, salty tears running down his face between sobs. yoongi scoops jeongguk carefully into his arms, jeongguk wrapping his arms around yoongi tightly.
yoongi plants kisses in his hair as he cries. at one point, he starts crying, too, tears falling into jeongguk’s hair. yoongi and jeongguk cry together until they’re both reduced down to small hiccups and whimpers. yoongi squeezes jeongguk once; a reminder that he’s still here.
“hyung, i’m sorry, i’m so sorry.” jeongguk whimpers into yoongi’s chest. yoongi shakes his head back and forth, pulling jeongguk’s face away from his chest so he can look him in the eye.
“if anyone should be apologizing, it’s me, baby, okay? i’ve been such an asshole today and i’m so sorry. i’m so sorry, hyung is so sorry, bun.” yoongi wipes the tears around jeongguk’s eyes, sending a smile his way.
“i’m sorry i dropped your favorite mug, and thank you for reminding me to take my meds. i’m sorry i yelled at you when holly slipped from his harness, and i’m sorry if i made you feel like i don’t care about or love you. because i do, i care about you and love you so so much, bun.” yoongi tells jeongguk, knocking their foreheads together.
“i’m sorry i got mad about the mug; it’s just a thing, it can be replaced. i’m sorry i let holly slip out of his harness, and i’m sorry i didn’t pick dinner.” jeongguk breathes.
“bun, you have nothing to apologize for. you did nothing wrong; you reaction was understandable, you couldn’t have stopped holly from slipping out of the harness, and you couldn’t pick dinner. i understand. you were doing work and clearly didn’t want to be bothered but i did it anyway. i’m the one who should be sorry.” yoongi smiles sadly at jeongguk, earning an equally sad smile from jeongguk.
“what’s wrong, hyung?” jeongguk asks, running a hand up and down yoongi’s arm in a soothing manner. “something must have set you off this morning. talk to me, hyung, what is it?”
“i got laid off early this morning,” yoongi says plainly. “it’s honestly not a big deal but it set me off, i think.”
“oh, yoongi, baby,” jeongguk says, pulling yoongi in for a hug. “hyung, i’m sorry.”
“it’s fine, bun.” yoongi says, voice shaky.
“that place was a nice place for you. it helped your anxiety and depression and wasn’t too hard on you because you’re fantastic at your job. this was a good routine for you but breaking that routine is gonna mess with you.” jeongguk says into yoongi’s hair.
“how about we watch your mood for a few days and maybe make you a new routine, hm? how does that sound?” jeongguk asks, kissing yoongi’s forehead.
“sounds good, bun. ‘m sorry, hyung ‘s sorry.” yoongi slurs out, feeling tired deep in his bones.
“you don’t need to apologize. but if it makes you feel any better, i forgive you, ‘kay? bun forgives you, yoon.” jeongguk threads his fingers through yoongi’s hair to hear him sigh contentedly. yoongi takes a breath and lifts his head up, fitting their lips together in a deep kiss.
“i love you, bun. love you so much, bunny.” yoongi sighs and lets jeongguk pull him down into bed with him.
“i love you too, hyung. love you so much, always.” yoongi sneaks another kiss and comfies himself under the duvet with a small smile.
“sleep now, deal with all of this tomorrow. ‘kay?” jeongguk checks with yoongi, pulling him into his chest. yoongi fits himself over jeongguk, practically on top of him, and sighs heavily. jeongguk can tell he’s tired.
“yeah, bun. tomorrow.”