Archive of Our Own ^beta

Taeyong gets the call when he is standing in aisle four, looking at the various types of pastas. Johnny is somewhere in the store on a search for the vegetables they will need for the next three days and Taeyong has nobody to pass his own phone onto. Johnny is usually the victim when Taeyong feels his phone vibrate against his leg, or one of their friends when they are close, but Taeyong figures he can’t exactly give his phone to the lady who stands a few feet away from him and so he unpockets it, answering without looking at who it is. 

“Taeyong Lee speaking?” He can hear the slight shake in his voice as he speaks, and for a second Taeyong is tempted to end the call and hide in between the toilet rolls of aisle eleven. He doesn’t, though, and instead steels himself for whoever just called him and whatever is about to happen like the grown adult he is. He feels a bit odd giving himself a pep-talk while holding a staring competition with a pack of gluten-free pennes, but Taeyong has done weirder things in his life. 

Sleep shirtless in a tent being one of them. Sometimes, when Taeyong closes his eyes and remembers that particular camping trip, he swears he can still feel the mosquito bites on his back. 

“Good afternoon, Taeyong! This is Irene! Am I calling you at an inconvenient time?” Taeyong almost drops his phone. He can feel his hand growing slack around it, but he manages to find his grip right before his phone slips out of his hand. Irene. Taeyong looks around, desperately hoping for Johnny to magically appear somewhere beside him, but he doesn’t. Instead, the realization sinks in that Johnny is someone who is easily distracted, and the toy aisle in this particular supermarket is big. 

Taeyong wants to hang up again, but he stops himself before he can do so. Instead, he hopes that Irene has heard the noises of the store around him, the rattle of the carts and the horrendous music they always play. Johnny is adamant the supermarket picks a playlist a seventy-year old woman makes, the music old and not the good kind of old, but Taeyong doubts that very much. He’s worked in retail for a few years during college — the music isn’t picked. It just plays. 

“Irene! Hello! How are you? And no — no don’t worry! It’s not inconvenient.” Except for the fact that it is very inconvenient, but this is Irene. The lady who has been trying really hard to help Johnny and Taeyong through the loops and holes of adopting a child, and for that reason alone Taeyong feels obligated to keep talking.

Even though he’s still holding a staring contest with the pennes and the fact that his phone anxiety has only grown over the past few years. Back when he worked in retail, he had to answer the phone all the time. That ease, however, faded over the years and all Taeyong has left is the frightening feeling of ‘fuck’ when someone calls him. 

“Are you sure? I think I can he—”

“No it’s fine! Why are you calling?” Irene doesn’t call them very often anymore. In the beginning things had been different — constant phone calls, check-ups, appointments to see whether their house in the suburbs was a safe place for children and all that and more — but now, two years down the line, Irene barely calls anymore. 

So, when she does, it’s important. Last time she called it was to tell them that they had officially been accepted into the system, which was over eight months ago. They have spoken to her since, but only whenever they called instead of her. And Johnny is always the one to make those calls, so it’s been a while since Taeyong has heard her voice. 

“I have news!” 

Taeyong feels his stomach drop like a rock has attached itself to it and pulled it down through his body and onto the disgusting floor of the supermarket. The rock isn’t made out of bad thoughts or negativity, but of hope and the wish that Johnny and him have carried for the past few years. The rock is small, but heavy enough to pull his stomach down. Perhaps not onto the floor, but it’s nearly there. 

“Ne— news?” Taeyong asks, realizing that he sounds like an absolute idiot while standing there. He hasn’t turned around in over two minutes or reached out for any of the produce in front of him, and he is pretty sure Johnny will be returning soon only to find his boyfriend of over six years standing there, like an idiot. 

He whips his head around, though, when the realization hits him that this must be pretty big. “Should Johnny be here? Because I can go get him — he’s just with the vegetables.” 

“Vegetables?” For a brief second, Taeyong entertains the thought of Johnny just standing there, looking at the vegetables in their fridge or the fruit bowl they have on the counter, but he shakes that thought off. 

“Yeah, we’re getting groceries.” 

“Oh! That’s okay! I just wanted to say that it’s good news and ask if it was possible for you guys to come to the office tomorrow.” Taeyong can’t imagine why they can’t, for both Johnny and him have the weekend off, and so he hums. 

He tries to keep the excitement he feels at bay. They have had false hope before — he doesn’t want to live another month with that hollow feeling in his chest. “Yeah — oh god yeah of course! What time?” 

He hears some shuffling on the other line before Irene’s voice returns. “Can you do eleven? I’ll come to the office and we can talk.” 

Taeyong nods, before realizing that she can’t see him. “Yeah — yeah eleven is fine.” 

Irene hangs up with the usual pleasantries, telling him to say hello to Johnny for her, and it isn’t until Taeyong puts away his phone back in his pocket does he realize what actually just happened. A sudden feeling of giddiness rises up in his throat, making tears appear in his eyes, and he tries to swallow them down. 

He reaches forward to grab regular pennes, throwing them into the cart just as he feels a hand on his arm. Taeyong doesn’t have to turn around to know that it is Johnny, a reusable bag filled with different sorts of vegetables being placed in the cart just as Johnny kisses him on the cheek. “I got everything — even looked at the condition of them and chose the ugliest.” 

Taeyong huffs. They have been trying to live a little more eco-friendly, hence the reusable bag, and Johnny read somewhere that the vegetables that look ugly get thrown out at the end of the day. He’s right, of course, but Taeyong doesn’t put the fruits with the slight lumps in their fruit bowl. “Good—”

Before Taeyong can say anything more, Johnny turns him around with ease. “Are you alright?” 

After six years, you get used to one another, Taeyong knows this. But every time Johnny asks him if everything is fine without him having to even look at his face, Taeyong feels like ground has been removed from under his feet. “Yeah — Irene just called.”

Johnny’s eyebrows shoot up, nearly touching his hairline, and his mouth drops open. His hair isn’t styled like he usually does when he goes to work, strands lose without any gel or spray, and he looks comfortable. Taeyong likes Johnny in a suit, of course, but something about Johnny like this makes Taeyong’s heart flutter in his chest. Especially when he looks as confused as he does right now. 

“Irene? Irene Kim? Adoption lady Irene?”

Taeyong nods, the excitement in him only growing as Johnny starts to smile. “Yes! Her! We have an appointment tomorrow!”

Johnny’s eyes go even wider, “Tomorrow? What did she say?”

Taeyong closes his eyes. Good news can mean that a family is interested in them, but that doesn’t mean they will finally be able to start preparing one of their spare rooms. “That it was good news.”

Johnny gasps and before Taeyong can say anything, he feels arms wrap around his waist and pull him toward him and up in the air. Taeyong wants to protest, wants to scold Johnny that they are in the middle of a supermarket and that there are several other people in their aisle, but he doesn’t. Instead, he allows the happiness that he feels low in his tummy to spread through the rest of his body, making his feet tingle. 

“We could be getting a kid, baby,” Johnny whispers. For a second Taeyong fears that Johnny will start crying right then and there, but when Johnny puts him down and he feels the floor back under his two feet, he sees that Johnny’s eyes are perfectly dry. They’ve turned into crescent moons, but they’re dry. Taeyong is grateful for that, for he is the cryer between the two of them and when Johnny cries, Taeyong does, too. 

“We could, but —”

“No false hope.” Johnny whispers again, leaning in and placing a soft kiss against Taeyong’s lips. Taeyong closes his eyes, leaning his forehead against Johnny’s chest when he pulls back, and sighs. 

“No false hope.” 

It’s a mantra the two of them have picked up over the past few months. They’re part of a group of parents looking to adopt or who are in the foster system, and they’ve seen several of the group members be blessed with a child or children. While Taeyong tries not to feel envious of those people, he does feel the sinking feeling every now and then. Especially when he sees parents on the streets, holding their children’s hands or pushing a stroller with a giggling baby safely tucked inside. 

“But we can have a little hope, right?” Johnny asks. His voice sounds vulnerable, like the wrong word could shatter him entirely, and Taeyong hates seeing Johnny like this. Johnny has wanted a child ever since he was one himself. He’s always been a family man, looking out for everyone who allows him to and even when they don’t. And he deserves a child, too, for he will be the best dad anyone could ever wish for, and sometimes Taeyong wishes he could give Johnny what he wanted. 

Now, though, they can have a little hope, and so Taeyong nods. “Yes, a little hope.”

Johnny moves to take Taeyong’s hand with his left hand, pulling the cart along with his right one, and Taeyong imagines the two of them walking like this in the grocery store, a small bundle of joy in the small seat made for children in the cart. With that thought in the back of his head, Taeyong tries to focus back on their list.

Taeyong tries his best to distract himself for the next fifteen hours. He cleans the living room, he irons the blouses that have been waiting to be pressed for over three weeks and he cooks dinner. By the time that’s done, Johnny is the one who gets jittery with nerves. 

They go for a walk in the park close to their home, relishing in the February air that will soon turn warmer and warmer, and after that Johnny offers to put on a movie before they go to bed. Taeyong doesn’t focus on the movie and instead looks at cribs on his laptop, ending with the two of them looking at baby clothes and furniture for the rest of the night. 

It’s a failed attempt at not having false hope, Taeyong knows, but when they walk through the doors of the agency and are directed to Irene’s office, he can’t say he regrets it. It brought both Johnny and him a sense of comfort, a light in the darkness that waiting for that phone call brings, and they needed that light. 

After they first signed up, did the paperwork and were vetted and accepted, both Johnny and Taeyong had accepted that it would take a while. That they wouldn’t be chosen right away. And for a while, that worked. They believed it and didn’t get up in the morning wishing for that phone call to come that day. Unfortunately, after a while, the hope they carried started to dwindle and every now and then, they would get up with sadness in their hearts because they still hadn’t gotten that phone call.

Taeyong is sure that if Irene had called him when they were at home, he would have screamed in the living room. He is somewhat grateful that they were out of the house, surrounded by strangers and the likes, for Taeyong’s reaction had been much more tame than it would have been like, had they been at home. 

Taeyong feels Johnny squeeze his hand. “It’s going to be fine, love. No matter what happens, what she says — things will be fine.” 

Taeyong nods. He knows Johnny is right, but he isn’t sure how he will react if Irene tells them they have to wait longer. “Yeah. We’ll be fine.” 

Johnny reaches up and knocks on the heavy wooden door. They’ve seen Irene’s office before, have spent several hours there while signing papers, doing interviews and check-ups, but Taeyong feels nervous every time they come. It’s been a while and when she calls back for them to open the door, Taeyong isn’t surprised to see that a few things have moved around. 

The pictures of her own daughter still hang on the wall in the same frames, a painting she did right underneath. The blue couch she used to have has been replaced with a darker green one, fitting the new colour of her right side wall. Small things have changed over the last few months since they were last here, and it hits Taeyong just how long they have been waiting just a few seconds later. 

He knows that, technically, two years isn’t that long. Some couples wait five years before that phone call happens, some even longer, but these two years have felt like an eternity for Taeyong. 

“Good morning! Did Yeri offer you a cup of tea yet?” She asks, standing up. Taeyong nods, bowing his head at her just as she does the same before sitting back down. Johnny and him take this as their cue to sit down, too, and Taeyong’s leg starts shaking as soon as his feet touch the ground. 

“Yes, she did.” 

Irene is smiling. Taeyong has to try really hard not to look at the papers on her desk or the way her eyes never leave them, for if he does, he thinks he might give himself that last sliver of false hope that is enough to send him over the edge. Instead, he keeps his eyes focused on the edge of her desk, the dark wood reminding him a little of the scandinavian style the entire office has, and he squeezes Johnny’s hand. “Good! I’m glad. Now, Johnny, I’m sure Taeyong has told you we have some good news for you two.” 

Taeyong raises his eyes to look at her this time, and he feels his heart start to beat faster in his chest. Johnny hums from next to him. Taeyong can almost feel the hope radiating off of him, the need, the unconditional and endless love Johnny holds that is ready to spill over, and he hopes, too. “He did, yes. I’ve been nervous ever since.”

Irene chuckles, that kind smile back on her face, and she nods. “I can imagine. It’s not something we like to say over the phone, hence the appointment I made with Taeyong. But! We do have some good news.” 

Before she can say more or Taeyong or Johnny can say something, Yeri hurries into the room holding two mugs of tea. Taeyong takes his mug into his hands gratefully, letting go of Johnny’s hand, and he misses it instantly. Yeri rushes out of the room again, a spring in her step, and Taeyong feels the joy coming off of her rubbing off on himself. 

“Anyway— we have some brilliant news for you two. A month ago a little boy was brought to one of our anonymous facilities.” 

Taeyong’s eyes widen. “Is he okay?”

He can feel Johnny tense beside him, his leg against Taeyong’s. Irene nods, “He is. He was admitted to the hospital for a day for check-ups, but he was discharged with a clean bill of health. He’s been staying with one of our foster families for the past few weeks, but we think that he could be a perfect fit for you two.” 

Taeyong feels the sudden need to cry creep up on him like a ghost in the night. A boy. A boy who needs kindness and care and a house filled to the brim with unconditional love, something they have and more. Johnny whips his head around to look at him and Taeyong spots a single tear in his eyes, making the tears that are threatening to spill brim at his own eyes, too.

“How old is he?” Taeyong asks, his voice laced with the tears that are now rolling down his cheeks. Irene hands him a box of tissues and he hands one to Johnny before taking one for himself, dabbing at his eyes. 

Irene smiles at them, folding her hands across one another before opening her mouth. “The person who gave him to us told us he was only five months old. He’s six months now, and his birthday is on the second of August.” 

“A summer baby,” Johnny whispers. Taeyong knows it’s mostly to himself, but he also knows that Johnny is already imagining so many things in his head. A game of soccer in their backyard while the sun sets in the sky late at night, the scent of a barbecue still cooling down after a family dinner for his birthday. He can almost see the gears turning in his head, his fantasies running wild, and Taeyong reaches over to grab his hand. 

“A summer baby,” He repeats before turning to Irene, “Is this real?”

Irene giggles, nodding. “Very real. I can give you two some time to decide, but it won’t be long. This boy needs to be placed into a loving household quickly.”

“We don’t need time.” Johnny says, straightening in his chair. Taeyong feels like he should disagree with him, that they should think this through, but he doesn’t want to. Instead, he nods in agreement, and squeezes Johnny’s hand once more. 

“That’s good to hear. Of course this might still take some time and you won’t be parents completely out of the blue, but this will speed up the process a lot more.” 

Taeyong nods. He knows that weeks will probably pass by before they will be taking the beautiful boy home, but he doesn’t mind. They have waited years, they can wait a few more weeks with the certainty of finally having their own child. “Thank you — thank you so much.” 

They exchange pleasantries and Irene promises to call later today to confirm everything and start the adoption process, and before Taeyong knows it they’re standing on the sidewalk next to the agency office. Warmth spreads through his body despite the cold February wind, and he whirls around to hold Johnny close. 

The tears keep coming and coming while Johnny just kisses him, again and again, and they probably look stupid and like two idiots standing there on the sidewalk, kissing one another while laughing and crying, but Taeyong doesn’t care. They’re going to have a baby, after all this waiting. They’re going to have their own little bundle of joy. 

“Do you think he’ll like this?” 

Taeyong turns around to face Johnny. The other is standing in the middle of one of the spare rooms they have, boxes that contain the new furniture for the nursery surrounding him. He holds out a blue pillow, one that Yuta had gotten them a week or so ago when they finally told their friends about the adoption, and Taeyong huffs. “He’s a baby, Johnny. He won’t care.”

Johnny pouts the same pout he always pulls when he wants take-out or skip out on a walk in the park, and Taeyong feels himself succumb to the looks of it. “Why are we doing all of this then?”

Taeyong hums, shrugging. “Because I think it’s cute.” 

The file of their adoption lays on the dining table downstairs, the first picture they ever saw of their soon to be son hidden within. The file got delivered this morning while they were out shopping for furniture and the likes, and they still haven’t looked at it. Taeyong wants to, he really does, but Johnny had been adamant on finishing the room, first. 

The pieces of paper that lay on the table make it so much more real, the realization slowly downing on the two of them. Taeyong doesn’t mind the rush of adrenaline, the surge of anxiety he feels whenever he thinks about that beautiful boy who will be their son in a few weeks time, but it makes his hand shake all the same. 

He puts the small stack of little onesies into the drawer next to him, closing said drawer before making his way to Johnny’s side of the room. “Of course you think it’s cute. Should we take a coffee break?”

Taeyong eyes the boxes filled with the bassinet, the changing table and the swinging chair. He knows they have all the time in the world to finish setting them up, still, but he wants to get it done. The faster, the better. He wants the baby to come into a home that’s prepared to raise him, and that means a full functioning room. 

He relents, though, and nods. “Yeah — that sounds good.” 

He allows for Johnny to lead him out of the room and down the stairs, into the living room. The house has four bedrooms, one of which is used as a makeshift office for when Johnny feels like working from home, and one that is their own. One remains empty, and now the other one is slowly being filled with stuff for their baby. 

The first time they went to view this house, Johnny had been hesitant. Too much space, too little things to fill them with, and for a while they couldn’t choose between this house and the one a few blocks down with only three bedrooms. But when an offer was placed on the other house and left them with this one, it felt like fate. 

The house is beautiful and exactly what Taeyong has always dreamed of. They have a backyard large enough for a small flower garden and a barbecue nook with cozy seating, ideal for summer dinners with friends. The living room is spacious with a fireplace, opening up into the kitchen that Johnny fell in love with the very first time he saw it. Taeyong loves it just the same and, more often than not, they spend their morning time at the breakfast bar instead of at the table. 

Taeyong supposes, though, that that will change when the little boy gets here and they have to feed him, too. He can already imagine when the boy is old enough to sit in a baby-chair, they will be spending more time at the dining table instead. It’s a lovely thought, one Taeyong smiles at when he follows Johnny into the living room. 

Johnny halts next to the dining table, his eyes on the file, and Taeyong’s smile only grows. “Go on. Open it.” 

Johnny doesn’t hesitate. He reaches forward to grab it, tearing the tape and taking the file out of the envelope. Taeyong crowds next to him, leaning his head against Johnny’s arm as he tries to focus on the words in front of him. 

He doesn’t see the words, though. All he sees is the small picture the agency included. The baby smiles back at him, his eyes large and full of curiosity, and Taeyong feels himself falling in love with the small hands that are curled into fists. 

“His name is Mark.” Johnny whispers, his thumb hovering over the information. Mark. Taeyong hums. 

“I like that.” 

“He’s so cute.” Johnny then says, taking the picture out of the file. The file holds information they already know, like the status of Mark’s health and how exactly he arrived at the agency's doorstep, but the information of his name and the very first picture they have of him is new. 

“He really is.” Taeyong reaches out, caressing the lines of Mark’s chubby face with his fingers. He can’t wait to hold him for real, to feel his heartbeat and hear his breathing. He can’t wait to hear Mark’s laugh, to feel him wrap his small hand around Taeyong’s finger or see him with Johnny, and Taeyong feels tears brim at his eyes once more. 

“Oh Yongie, time will fly by.” Johnny says. He puts the photo down on the table, Mark smiling up at them now, and wraps an arm around Taeyong’s shoulder. Taeyong feels him place a kiss on top of his head, and he nods. 

“I know it will — I just can’t wait.” But Taeyong knows they have to. A lot of legal things need to be looked at and they have to babyproof the house, build all the furniture from the bassinet to the baby chair and paint one of the walls a light green. They need to shop for necessities Mark will need, from bottles to diapers and more, and they need to arrange their paid leave from work. 

So many things left to do and yet Taeyong wishes for Mark to already be here, with him and in their arms. He can’t imagine what the poor baby has already gone through, and he wants to make him feel as loved as one can be. “Me neither baby, me neither.” 

Taeyong looks up to meet Johnny’s eyes and all he sees is happiness, eagerness and an infinite amount of adoration. After six years together, Taeyong thought he had gotten used to the way Johnny looks at him. But, every time Johnny looks at him with so much love in his eyes, it manages to sweep Taeyong off of his feet. 

Yuta likes to take credit for them being together, still. It was his house party they met at, after all, and the other reminds them of this every single milestone they reach. On their fifth anniversary Yuta sent them a congratulations card signed as cupid and, to no one's surprise, when Johnny and Taeyong announced they were finally getting a child, Yuta was the one to jump up and congratulate them with a wink. 

Taeyong doesn’t mind, though. Now that Yuta has Jungwoo he is far less insufferable and an idiot in love. 

All of their friends had been ecstatic for them, of course. Doyoung and Jaehyun, already the proud parents of their little boy Jeno, and Kun and Ten as the lovely parents of Chenle, had joked about the fact that they were losing their lives before congratulating them. The childless part of their group had congratulated them and Sicheng and Yukhei had claimed babysitting dibs, but Taeyong is fairly certain that Mark will not need a sitter for the first few months at all. 

Yuta, after his whole ‘this is my doing!’ act, had hugged the both of them like they were going to disappear if they didn’t. 

If everything goes right, Taeyong will be able to take three weeks off to get acclimated before returning to the office only three days a week. Johnny has much more freedom as a freelancer for different companies and is able to work from home any day he wants, and so they won’t need a sitter. Of course, when Taeyong had told Yukhei and Sicheng just that, Doyoung and Jaehyun had scoffed and told them that they would definitely need a sitter. 

Taeyong looks down at the picture on the table once more and sighs. He doubts he will be able to leave Mark for the first few months, at least, and the thought of the boy finally coming home in a few weeks time makes one tear roll down his cheek. 

“Happy tears?” He hears Johnny ask, and he nods.

“Yeah. Happy tears.” 

“Good.” Johnny places another kiss on the top of Taeyong’s head before he lets go. Taeyong watches him go into the kitchen, the imagery of Johnny holding Mark as he does so making warmth spread through his body. He pushes the thought away for now, and follows Johnny into the kitchen. 

Their own little bundle of joy comes two months later, when  the agency finally sets up a date for Johnny and Taeyong to pick up Mark. It sounds like a transaction of sorts when the lady on the phone tells them where and when to meet them, but Taeyong shakes that feeling off. The excitement that had sizzled in the pit of his stomach for the past few weeks grows with every day right until the second of April.

The house in front of them looks well-kept, the front-yard decorated with beautiful flowers that are starting to grow as spring carries on, and Taeyong likes it. It looks like one of those houses in the movies, a house where children grow up to be happy and loved, and when Taeyong spots toys littering the grass, he knows he must be right. 

Except that, some of the children in this house leave eventually. Taeyong knows this family — they’re on the register that Johnny and him were given right after they had officially joined the list of parents wishing to adopt — and knows that they foster children. They have three of their own, if he remembers correctly, and he can’t imagine the stress of having to raise so many children.

One child is already scary, especially for the first time. The anxiety that that thought brings is unpleasant, leaving a bitter taste in Taeyong’s mouth as Johnny and him trail down the drive-way and toward the front door. A wooden sign sticks out of the earth a few feet away from it, next to the mailbox, decorated with names carved into the wood. The list is longer than the amount of children that are currently in the house, Taeyong guesses as he reads them, but it’s an endearing touch. 

He almost feels bad taking Mark out of this house, where he would be loved as well, but he doesn’t allow for those feelings to last long. Johnny and him are going to love Mark even more, without a doubt. Taeyong swallows just as Johnny reaches up to ring the doorbell, and Taeyong squeezes the hand he is holding. 

This is the very last time they will just be ‘Johnny and Taeyong’. In less than two hours they will walk out of this exact front door and be ‘Johnny, Taeyong and Mark’. The thought makes warmth spread through Taeyong’s chest, the knowledge that their own name sign will have to be changed soon making tears appear in the corner of his eyes. 

He wipes them away when the doorbell rings. Johnny and him are quiet as they wait, but Taeyong knows that Johnny is everything but calm. When they had woken up that morning, things had been a lot more hectic and chaotic. They rushed around, trying to waste time on the most mundane things before they sat down and had a serious conversation before going back to try and distract each other as time went by incredibly slowly. 

And now here they are. 

Taeyong can hear footsteps on the other side of the door, a high-pitched scream from somewhere in the house. Taeyong turns his head to look at Johnny, only to be met with him already looking at him, too. Johnny raises an eyebrow before letting out a dry chuckle and Taeyong shakes his head, letting out a giggle too. 

Before he can say anything, though, the door opens and reveals a woman. She looks around her mid-forties, a kind smile in her eyes, and Taeyong feels instantly welcome. Behind her he can see a little girl, hiding behind the woman’s leg, and he waves at her. She smiles, a giggle leaving her lips, before she sprints off down the hall. 

“Good afternoon you two! You must be Johnny and Taeyong! I’m Sooyoung, it’s lovely to meet you.” 

Johnny hums, reaching out to shake her hand. “Yes, it’s incredibly nice to meet you. We’re very excited.”

Taeyong wants to roll his eyes, but before he can do so, Sooyoung lets out a soft laugh. “That makes me very, very happy. I bet Mark is excited, too.” 

She leads them through the short hallway into the living room, where Taeyong spots several other small children. A boy lays on the couch, cuddling with what seems to be a small bunny plushie, and Taeyong smiles as it reminds him of Doyoung. Jeno has one of those, too, and Jaehyun has taught him to call it ‘doie’. 

An older girl sits at what Taeyong assumes to be the dining table, her head ducked down as she writes. Books litter the table and a steaming mug of something stands next to her. The atmosphere in the room screams comfortable, home, and Taeyong is so glad that people like this exist. 

Johnny and him had talked about becoming foster parents, too. And, looking around this room, Taeyong knows that he could do it. He could provide children with a safe home, a nice family that won’t leave them behind as soon as they turn eighteen and are an adult in the eyes of the law, and he knows that Johnny wants it, too. But, a mutual decision between the two has been made; once they are a little older, have experience with what it takes to raise a child and, of course, are accepted as foster parents. 

Taeyong shakes those thoughts away for now. Instead, he focuses on the way Sooyoung pulls two chairs out for them. Taeyong follows Johnny’s movement and sits down, still holding onto his hand like it’s his lifeline. And, right now, it feels like it might just be that. Taeyong feels oddly nervous all of a sudden, his knee bouncing up and down slightly, and he bites his lip.

“Can I get you two anything? Tea? Water?” 

“Tea will be fine, thank you.” Johnny answers for the both of them. Taeyong expects for Sooyoung to walk off into the kitchen to prepare their drinks, but she turns to the older girl instead. 

“Would you mind getting these two gentlemen something to drink?” 

To Taeyong’s surprise, the girl doesn’t look annoyed at the interruption at all. Instead, she hums and nods before scooting away. Taeyong follows her as she walks away, only turning her head when she is out of view. Sooyoung sits down at the table with them, folding her hands on the wooden surface. “How are you two doing?” 

Taeyong sighs, “Honestly? Incredibly nervous.” 

He feels guilty admitting it and for a split second he worries Sooyoung won’t let Mark go with them. Instead, she reaches over to pat Taeyong’s hand like she is his grandmother, and Taeyong feels comforted instantly. “That’s completely normal — and, like I said, it makes me very happy. It means that you two care.” 

Johnny squeezes Taeyong’s hand before clearing his throat. “We do — we do care. We’re incredibly excited to meet him.”

Sooyoung smiles, nodding. “Irene has told me all about you two. You seem like lovely people and capable of giving Mark all the love and attention he needs. I have no doubt he will grow up happy with you.”

Taeyong doesn’t want it to, but a tear slips past his defences anyway. He can feel it roll down his cheek, but he doesn’t move to wipe it away. I have no doubt he will grow up happy with you. It manages to wash away any doubt he has had over the past few months, whether the two of them were the right fit to be parents after all, and Taeyong doubts Sooyoung even knows it. 

“Thank you — thank you. That means a lot,” He says. His voice trembles as he does so, but he doesn’t mind. Johnny’s hand moves to squeeze his thigh again, just like he had done at breakfast that morning, and it grounds Taeyong for the briefest of seconds. “I’ve always wanted children — and this — it’s so fast? We’re so lucky.”

Taeyong knows he’s rambling, but Sooyoung doesn’t seem to mind. Her smile only grows when Johnny hums, nodding. “We’re incredibly lucky — and ready. I don’t think I’ve wanted anything more than to have a child.” 

“You two don’t have to convince me, you know? I fully support the agency’s decision to choose the two of you. I’ve read your file, seen pictures of your house and what you do for a living. You’re perfect.” Sooyoung says, and Taeyong really thinks she is out to make the two of them bawl like babies before meeting Mark. 

“Thank you,” Johnny answers. Taeyong can tell that the tears are close to spilling for Johnny, too. With the simple dip of his voice, the tremble in the movement of his hands and the slight shift of his shoulders are tell-tale signs that Johnny is close to crying, and Taeyong swallows as a tear finally slips and rolls down his cheek.

“Oh! You’re both going to make me cry! Hyunjin, sweetie, will you please grab the tissue box from the other room?”

Taeyong chuckles, dabbing at his eyes with his hands. The boy that had been on the couch huffs, but he stands up and walks off. He returns quickly, holding a tissue box and putting it down on the table. 

“Thank you,” Taeyong says. Hyunjin nods his head before returning back to his spot on the couch, and Taeyong wonders just how long Hyunjin has been here. He doesn’t ask, though. He doesn’t want to talk about Hyunjin like he isn’t in the same room, and instead moves back to look at Sooyoung. 

“They’re all incredibly sweet.” He says, and Sooyoung smiles at him.

“Thank you,” She says. Taeyong can almost feel the pride radiating off of her, and he wonders whether Johnny and him will be like that too. Whether they won’t stop gushing about Mark, proud of everything he does and says in the future, and the thought makes him smile. “Mark is currently still napping, but he’ll probably wake up in twenty minutes or so.”

“That’s fine,” Johnny answers, and Taeyong nods. They have all the time in the world and can wait. He doesn’t want to wake Mark from his precious sleep, after all.

The older girl returns with their tea not a minute later, putting the mugs down on the table alongside what Taeyong assumes to be a cookie tin. Sooyoung opens the lid, holding it out for them to pick from. “Can I offer you a cookie while we wait? They’re homemade.” 

Taeyong has never declined the offer of homemade cookies and despite the fact that his nerves make it harder to eat, he takes a cookie out of the tin anyway. 

Holding Mark for the very first time feels like a complete dream. Taeyong can’t let go of him, and the tiny smile the baby in his arms gives him is enough to make the tears that had been brimming at his eyes spill out. 

Sooyoung is lovely. While Johnny and Taeyong fawn over Mark, introducing themselves to a very sleepy and giggly baby, she rushes around the room to pack the remaining things that belong to Mark. To Taeyong’s ache it isn’t much, barely a backpack full of stuff, but he knows that Mark will have much more in the future. 

She doesn’t ask whether Taeyong wants to let Mark go. Instead, Johnny offers to help Sooyoung by carrying Mark’s things to their car and Taeyong is left standing in the bedroom. The crib Mark had been sleeping in looks worn, like all the children in the house had used the same one when they were younger, and a single bed stands against the wall on the other side of the room. 

Taeyong allows for Mark to suck on one of his fingers as he waits. He can’t stop looking at him, Mark’s wide eyes staring back at him every single time he looks down. The weight in his arms feels right, like it’s meant to be, and Taeyong can’t stop smiling. 

He thinks he finally understands the things his mother used to tell him when he was younger. How she had fallen in love with him from the very first moment she had seen him and wished to never let go. Taeyong feels the same as he stands there with Mark in his arms, the warmth of his tiny mouth around his pinky finger. 

Mark seems content, too, his eyes open as he looks around as much as he can. Taeyong smiles down at him and Mark smiles back, in all his toothless and baby glory, and Taeyong feels his heart do a flip. 

When he hears the sound of the front door opening again, Johnny’s voice carrying through the hallway, he moves out of the room. Johnny’s eyes are on him in an instant, a bright smile on his face, and Taeyong wants nothing more than to rush to him and hug him close with Mark safely placed in the middle.

Instead, he allows for Johnny to take Mark out of his arms when the other man comes closer. Taeyong misses the weight in his arms instantly, but the sight of Johnny holding their son is enough to make that feeling disappear. Johnny looks on cloud nine, caressing Mark’s small cheeks with his index finger, and Taeyong coos quietly. 

This is the sight he has wanted to see ever since Johnny and him had gotten serious. After a handful of dates Johnny asked him to be his boyfriend and at first Taeyong thought it would be one of those things he would look back on after college and smile about. Johnny was lovely at the time, but Taeyong hadn’t been sure about what he wanted.

But, a year down the line with a bachelor's degree in both of their pockets, Taeyong had woken up with the startling realization that no matter what he wanted in life, he wanted Johnny to be there with him. They didn’t talk about children until their third year anniversary, when Johnny shyly brought it up during a romantic dinner date.

It was like a dream come true, for Taeyong had always wanted kids. And now they are here, standing together as they marvel at their own bundle of joy that stares up at them like they have already hung the stars. Taeyong is sure that Mark will change his opinion down the line, but for now he relishes in the feeling. 

Sooyoung takes them through the last few things they may need or get contacted for by the agency before she allows them to leave, her phone number on a neat little business card already tucked in Taeyong’s wallet. He’s not sure they will need it but once they have more time for hobbies, he would like to know the recipe for those homemade cookies. 

The drive home is quiet. Mark lays in his car-seat, his eyes closed and mouth open, and Taeyong can’t stop watching him through the mirror of his car door. He feels Johnny’s hand on his thigh, resting there as they drive, and Taeyong understands. 

Johnny has also always wanted kids. Taeyong remembers listening to Johnny’s stories of his own childhood filled with friends, running around and playing. Taeyong remembers seeing Johnny cry when they saw a movie in which two men adopted a child for the very first time. He can’t begin to imagine the joy that Johnny feels right now as they drive home with their son, but he can try. He guesses it’s close to his own level of joy, and reaches out to take Johnny’s hand in his instead.

Johnny intertwines their fingers, raising Taeyong’s hand to place a kiss against his skin there. Taeyong feels the same butterflies rise in his stomach that he has felt ever since their very first date, and he grins. “I love you.”

Johnny turns his head briefly to look at him, and smiles. “I love you too.”

Taeyong feels like absolutely nothing can ruin this day. Even when Mark starts to cry when they are almost home, he doesn’t feel an ounce of annoyance. Instead, he turns around in his seat and tries to distract Mark as Johnny drives into their street, parking the car as quickly as he can before getting out. 

Once Johnny opens Mark’s car door, Taeyong gets out of the car, too. Johnny unlatches the car seat with relative ease, only managing to fiddle a few times, and Taeyong is the first to reach the front door. 

He unlocks it before stepping aside, making way for both Johnny and Mark. According to Sooyoung, Mark would get hungry soon, but before Taeyong can open his mouth and tell Johnny that he should go and heat up some formula, he hears footsteps in the living room.

“Hello?” Johnny calls out. He hands Taeyong the carrier and Taeyong takes it as his throat closes up. “Is anyone there?”

“Oh fuck — wait I can’t say that anymore — they’re home!” 

Taeyong instantly relaxes. Yuta’s voice echoes through the house as he continues to ramble words Taeyong can’t understand through the door, and he laughs. Johnny looks back at him with confusion on his face but before he can say anything, Doyoung opens the living room door and beats him to it. 

“Congratulations!”

Taeyong sighs as his head hits his pillow for the first time in over twelve hours. Johnny drops down next to him, the mattress dipping and their bedframe protesting, but Taeyong can’t say he cares much. He really wants to sleep, to have some quiet, and it seems that Mark agrees.

For the first time since they picked him up three weeks ago, Mark is sleeping in his very own bedroom. They have a bassinet in their own room still and the second Mark starts crying they will move him in there, but for now they are practicing sleeping apart.

Mark is sound asleep down the hall, the soft music of his baby mobile dying down, and yet Taeyong feels the worry deep in his stomach. “Should we really do this so early?” 

“Baby—”

Taeyong turns to his side, propping his head up with his hand as he looks at Johnny. “We’ve read the articles and the stories! What if he turns around and can’t breath? What if he misses us? What if he—”

Johnny shuffles forward and interrupts him by placing a soft kiss on his lips, effectively silencing him. “Baby — he’s going to be fine. He doesn’t have a pillow in there, we have the baby monitor and he is fast asleep.” 

Taeyong closes his eyes, and he nods. He knows Johnny is right, that his boyfriend has a point, but he can’t help and worry. He casts a glance at their bedroom door, slightly ajar to let in a little bit of light and for the sounds around the house, and he sighs. “You’re right.” 

It’s not like Mark has had any problems sleeping so far. Mark cries during the night but only sometimes, and they have been the one to wake him up on several occasions just to feed him. He behaves almost too perfectly, with small smiles and cute giggles that have Taeyong’s heart skipping a beat every time, and it makes something terrible curl in his chest. 

What if this is the calm before the storm? 

Taeyong remembers comforting Doyoung and Jaehyun when Jeno turned out to be a cry baby. They spent hours awake during the night, trying to coax the poor boy back to sleep. Chenle is the exact opposite, apparently. Taeyong has yet to receive a phone call from either of them in the middle of the night because of the crying — or, perhaps, Kun and Ten are very good at hiding their exhaustion.

Taeyong knows that every baby is different, too. He was more of a crybaby while his older sister was a very quiet baby, only complaining when she wanted food. Johnny told him that it was a toss-up for his own mother; Johnny either cried or was quiet, and it depended on the day. 

He casts one more glance at the door before he turns back to look at Johnny, who is looking at him. “Are you okay?”

He sounds worried, and Taeyong hates it. He nods. “I’m fine, I promise. What about you?” 

Johnny hums. Taeyong reaches over to thumb at his cheeks and he watches as his boyfriend closes his eyes before turning his head, placing a kiss against Taeyong’s thumb. “I’m fine too, baby. Happy. Insanely happy.” 

The warnings from their friends had all been jokes, of course, but Taeyong knows that both of them had been worried about it. That they would lose themselves, the ability to take time for just the two of them, but until now they haven’t experienced trouble like that at all. Perhaps that will change when Mark grows older, when he needs more and more attention, but Taeyong doubts it will be something they can’t handle. 

They have experienced worse, after all. When Johnny was away for two months in Chicago, helping his mother with the loss of her own mother, Taeyong was left here, unable to get away from work no matter how much he wanted to. Or, when they suffered through the weeks leading up to their thesis being due. They didn’t see one another for days on end, working as hard as they could, and Taeyong doubts anything will beat those feelings. 

Irene calls from time to time to check up on them. They have an appointment at the agency with Mark in two weeks and a check up with a pediatrician, and after that they won’t be checked on for a while. It’s a relief that everyone deems them good enough for Mark, for Taeyong has already become greatly attached to the little boy and he can’t imagine someone taking him away from them anymore. 

He’s woken up to several dreamy moments in the past few weeks. From walking into the kitchen in the morning to see Johnny feeding Mark from a bottle, the sunlight casting a warm glow over them, or taking a walk in the park with Mark in his stroller and holding onto Johnny’s hand. Johnny has always been his family, along with their friends, but now he has his very own family. And it’s absolutely wonderful. 

“Me too.” Taeyong answers, leaning into Johnny’s touch and curling in closer. Johnny is warm, always warm, and it’s convenient. Taeyong gets cold easily and so he wraps his arms around Johnny, digging his face into his boyfriend’s chest. “So insanely happy.”

He feels Johnny’s arms slot around him, his big hands on his back, and Taeyong smiles into the fabric of Johnny’s shirt. “Do you want to feed him first or should I?” 

They don’t have to feed Mark until one in the morning, but Taeyong hums anyway. “I don’t mind either options, but you should probably go first to catch some better sleep.” 

The thought of Johnny going back to the office for the first time in all these weeks makes Taeyong wish for the night to last forever, but he knows that it’s necessary. He has a meeting to attend, one that is important for one of the clients he works for, and Taeyong knows that Johnny will come back right after the meeting itself, but he still worries. 

It’ll be his first time alone with Mark apart from the few grocery runs they have done separately. “Stop worrying.” 

Taeyong pulls back from Johnny’s chest, a frown on his face. “What?” 

“Everything will be fine tomorrow, my love.” 

Somedays, Taeyong wishes for Johnny not to read him so easily. He’s an open book to Johnny, an easily deciphered riddle, and on days like these Taeyong wishes he wasn’t. “I know. I’m not worrying.”

“Sure, and Mark will grow wings. I know you’re worried.” Johnny’s voice isn’t stern like Taeyong remembers his mother’s voice to be when he did something naughty as a child, but in the way that makes Taeyong’s shoulders slump. 

“I can’t help it.” 

“I know you can’t, baby, and that’s why I’m here. You’ll do great and I’ll get to come home to both of my babies.” Johnny whispers, leaning in to place a kiss on Taeyong’s cheek. Taeyong scrunches his nose, his heart flipping at the thought of coming home to Johnny and Mark playing together once Mark is old enough to do just that, and he nods. 

“Fine.” 

“Good. Now — we should sleep for we have a tiny little monster who needs food at the weirdest times. Who came up with that, anyway?” Before Taeyong can say anything or stop Johnny, the other is reaching out to grab his phone from his nightstand. 

“Jo—” Taeyong shuts himself up when Johnny continues to type on his phone, and he groans. 

“Oh — apparently nobody really invented it.”

“That’s because babies aren’t something to invent, Johnny.” 

Johnny sighs, putting his phone back. “I know that, but I figured someone must have come up with the whole feeding chart Sooyoung gave us.” 

Taeyong huffs. According to the feeding chart they will have to stop most night feedings in a couple weeks time, one day at a time, and Taeyong finds himself feeling slightly excited for a complete nights sleep without the alarm waking them both up in the middle of the night. “Doctors did. Way back in the day. Can we sleep now?” 

Johnny snorts, but Taeyong feels a pair of arms snake around him once more and the pressure of Johnny’s lips on his shoulder. “Yes, yes we can. Get used to this, by the way, because I will teach our son to be curious about everything.”

While Johnny’s habit of googling facts and being curious about everything is usually adorable to Taeyong, it can get annoying at times. But, the image of Johnny and Mark sitting around a computer and googling various facts about subjects Mark is curious about makes his heart jump in his chest. “Fine by me, as long as he doesn’t use his phone during dinner.” 

That makes Johnny chuckle a little too loud and Taeyong winces, the both of them freezing in bed. Taeyong waits and holds his breath, his hand clamped around Johnny’s thigh, but nothing comes. He can feel Johnny relax against him, and he smiles before snuggling against Johnny’s body once more. “I love you.”

“Love you too.” 

According to one of Taeyong’s old teachers, all good things come to an end. The woman used to say that whenever spring turned into summer, when they finished reading a good book in class or when the holidays ended. She said it every time after a break, and Taeyong supposes it isn’t odd that he still remembers her saying it, syllable for syllable. 

And, sadly, she is right when it comes to most things. Like she used to say, summer holidays come to an end, friendships end, books end and don’t get a sequel and movies end on cliffhangers. 

But, Taeyong had held out hope that perhaps she wouldn’t be right this one time. Unfortunately, his hopes and whispers have gone unheard, and Mark starts the crying phase a month and a half after Johnny and Taeyong had picked him up.

It starts softly, at first. Babies have to get used to the lack of feeding during the night as they grow older, and Johnny blames Mark’s sudden nightly outbursts on that after having a thorough chat with his mother. When the crying doesn’t stop after a couple days, Taeyong calls his own mother with the same question, and gets the exact same answer. 

And while the both of them know it’s completely normal for babies to cry, Taeyong misses his sleep. He misses curling up to Johnny without interruptions for at least a couple hours, until feeding time, and he misses closing his eyes without the fear of Mark starting to cry in the back of his head. 

Taeyong now scoffs at the thought he had weeks ago, when he was worried that Mark not crying was a bad sign. Well, past Taeyong is right, and that had indeed been the calm before the storm. 

Mark seems to be fine during the day, though, which leaves both of them incredibly confused. He naps during the right times without hassle and he’s fine when they put him in the crib in the living room as Johnny and Taeyong move around the house and do their work. Sometimes, Johnny will take him into his office for a couple of hours, leaving Taeyong some quiet time to read, and Taeyong returns the favor by going out for walks or taking Mark with him to the grocery store when Johnny wants to do his home work-out. 

It works. During the day. When night rolls around a switch turns in Mark’s head and it’s the prime time to cry, apparently, and Taeyong really doesn’t know what to do.

He sits there, awkwardly crouched on the ground while holding onto Mark’s small hand. Mark’s skin is soft like always, smelling of the baby body soap they have started to use on him a couple days ago. It smells just like how babies are supposed to smell and Taeyong inhales it, his tired eyes trying to focus on Mark’s silhouette in the dark. 

He caresses Mark’s hand as he listens to his breathing. It hitches from time to time, Mark still calming down from his crying fit barely five minutes ago, and Taeyong wishes he could help him. Johnny is in their bed, probably awake at this point, and Taeyong has the brief thought of going to get him. He shakes that off, though, turning back to look at Mark instead. 

He seems to be asleep but Taeyong knows that the moment he gets back in his own bed and starts to feel comfortable back in Johnny’s embrace, Mark will start to cry once more. 

Taeyong sighs, closing his eyes. They’ve tried so many things, so many tips from online moms with experience. They’ve taken him on nightly walks, driven around with him in the dark and even feeding him just a little bit more than usual to make him fall asleep faster. None of the tactics have worked, and all of the articles state to keep Mark in his own crib and not succumb to the temptation of laying him in their room. 

Though Taeyong finds he can’t really care less about the opinions of mom’s he has never met before. He stands up, his mind made up completely, before reaching down into Mark’s crib and picking him up. Mark’s eyes open slowly and Taeyong shushes him, leaning in to place a kiss on his small forehead before walking out of the room. He walks down the hall, the wind of the spring storm that had passed through their town finally dying down, and he walks into Johnny and his bedroom with soft steps. 

Johnny sits up in bed, his eyes trying hard to focus on Taeyong standing in the doorway, and Taeyong smiles at him. “He’s gonna sleep here.” 

Johnny doesn’t protest this and instead just hums. “Sound plan.” 

Taeyong walks over to the crib that had gone unused for so long, laying Mark down on the soft mattress and pressing yet another kiss on his tiny forehead. “Sleep well.” he whispers into the dark. Mark looks up at him with eyes that seem close to fluttering close and Taeyong feels relief wash over him when he manages to get into bed without Mark starting to cry. 

Johnny opens his arms and Taeyong snuggles close. When Mark stays quiet, Taeyong allows himself to relax. “It’s working.”

Taeyong hums softly at Johnny’s words. “It shouldn’t.”

Johnny scoffs. He had offered to let Mark sleep in their room the first time Mark started crying and it didn’t stop for hours on end. Taeyong had refused simply because Mark needed to learn to sleep on his own, but now he realises that perhaps something makes Mark want the company of his two dads in the room while he sleeps. 

He sleeps fine during the day when Johnny and Taeyong are in the living room. He sleeps through everything, every loud noise they make on accident, and perhaps Mark really does just need the company while he sleeps. “He’ll be fine, love.” 

Taeyong knows that Johnny is right and that Mark will learn to sleep on his own. He also knows that once Mark refuses to sleep in their room, he will miss him greatly, and so he simply hums and nods before closing his eyes, admitting defeat for now. He feels Johnny’s lips on his forehead before they touch his lips, and Taeyong smiles. “We should sleep, too.” 

Taeyong can’t say he wants to protest that statement. He listens as Johnny gets comfortable, the only noise in the room their breathing after they both settle down. Taeyong feels delighted at the lack of crying, the loss of Mark’s quiet wails echoing through the house, and he decides that, if this is the solution for now, they will simply have to do it. 

Spring turns into early summer quickly, the time passing by like a river flowing toward the sea, It flows easily and Taeyong loses his grasp on it, the days and weeks flowing through his fingers, untouchable. But, Taeyong finds he doesn’t mind. 

Before he knows it, Johnny and him are sitting on their porch with a glass of wine in their hands with Mark on a playmat on the ground. Several foam blocks border the mat just in case Mark rolls over and it gives Taeyong the time and energy to focus on Mark’s cute little giggles as his tiny hands reach out to touch the small toys hanging from the mobile above him. 

Their conversation is soft, carrying through their backyard as they sit in the early June sun, and Taeyong can’t imagine a time he felt more whole. He remembers being seventeen, scared of everything unknown and afraid of the future and what it would hold. Thinking back on that now makes him want to giggle at his own stupidity. He still isn’t quite sure what he is doing, not one hundred percent at least, but he’s happy and that’s what matters in the end. 

The preparations for Mark’s birthday are already in full-swing despite it being two months away. Johnny wants it to be as special as can be despite the fact that Mark will probably not remember it when he is older, and Taeyong can’t find it in himself to stop any of it. 

Johnny has home videos on a camera he plans to show to their parents on his birthday, like a little viewing party, and they have already found a cake they want to order for the day. Taeyong has a grocery list written on his favorite notepad with all the meats and vegetables he will have to buy for the barbeque they’re hosting with their friends on the day itself, and he finds he can’t wait. 

Mark himself seems to be more aware of what happens around him every single day. He’s growing fast, growing out of several sets of clothes Johnny and him had bought him, and he can sit up by himself and crawl by now. One time Taeyong came home from the office to see Mark crawling all over the floor with the biggest smile on his face while Johnny sat on the floor a few feet away, arms wide open and tears brimming at his eyes. 

Taeyong had seen him crawl before, but seeing him crawl so enthusiastically while Johnny sat near him had been too much for his heart. Seeing Mark do all the things a baby is supposed to do and be healthy is all Taeyong has wanted ever since he learned they would have their own child, and he can’t believe it’s actually happening. 

Mark squeals from where he lays on the mat, and Taeyong looks down at him to see him holding on to one of the toys. Johnny lets out a soft laugh before reaching out and prying the toy from Mark’s hands. “You’re not supposed to grab them, Markie.” 

Taeyong rolls his eyes. “It’s the whole point of the game.”

Johnny scoffs, shaking his head. “No. The point of the game is for the toys to be impossible to reach to keep it fun. Mark is just too good.” 

Taeyong takes a sip of his wine, warmth spreading across his chest. Johnny thinks everything Mark does is good. He acts like Mark has come up with the cure for cancer every single time he stands up on his own or manages to hold onto something for longer than a few minutes, and it’s the most adorable thing Taeyong has ever seen. 

On Mark’s first playdate with little Chenle and Jeno, Mark had babbled something to Jeno that had definitely been incomprehensible and not a proper word, but Johnny was ecstatic nonetheless. Kun had simply rolled his eyes fondly, and Doyoung told him that Jaehyun had been the exact same way with Jeno. 

Having friends with their own children brought many, many pros along with adopting a baby. It left them less clueless. They had a net to fall back on whenever they didn’t know what to do that was less embarrassing than calling the agency, googling stories or finding contact with Sooyoung. Although, calling Ten or Jaehyun when Mark refused to eat had been embarrassing enough. 

Taeyong feels Johnny’s hand grab his as they sit next to one another. He smiles into his glass of wine, the dark red liquid sloshing around in the glass. Taeyong remembers that, during the first few months of their relationship, Johnny and him would go out on dates every other Friday night to make up for the time they lost while they were in their own classes. During the winter times, they frequented the cinema and several arcades. Once winter turned into spring and spring made way for warmer weather and nicer nights those dates became romantic dinners on rooftops, drive-in movies and nights spent on the rooftop of their dorm building, sipping on cheap beer or wine as they tried to look for the stars in a light-polluted sky. 

Now they sit in their own backyard, their son playing to his heart's content and yawning every second or so. Taeyong knows that Mark should be taken to bed soon, and he turns to Johnny. He squeezes Johnny’s hand as he does so and Johnny smiles at him. “What story are you going to read to him tonight?”

Johnny reading stories to Mark became a habit once the crying phase ended and Mark was able to sleep in his own room once more. They have quite the collection of children's books, three shelves filled with different stories and fairytales and every night Johnny picks a different one. Taeyong knows that Mark doesn’t understand most of it, but he read somewhere that talking to your baby from a very early age can help them learning once they grow older. Besides, seeing Johnny sitting next to Mark’s crib every night is a sight Taeyong will never get sick of and so, he doesn’t stop it.

Johnny muses, pursing his lips together. “I was thinking part of Cinderella.” 

Taeyong smiles, shaking his head. They had watched Cinderella a couple days ago when Chenle came to visit them for the day, Kun and Ten asking Johnny and him to babysit their son, and Mark had seemed to enjoy the movie just as much as Chenle did. 

According to Ten, Chenle wants a blue dress just like ‘that pretty princess with the blonde hair’ for his birthday and Kun is very adamant on buying one that looks exactly like the dress Cinderella actually wears in the movie. It’s cute and Taeyong can’t wait to see Chenle’s smile when he unpacks that present on his birthday in the future, but for now he looks down at Mark and smiles. “I always thought Tiana would become his favorite.” 

Johnny snorts, “We have time. I bet he’ll like the music of that movie too.” 

Taeyong can only imagine Mark dancing once he gets a bit older, bouncing to the jazzy music of the Princess and the Frog. “Maybe he’ll want her dress, too.”

Johnny smiles, his eyes finding Mark on his mat. “Then we’ll find him the best damn dress.”

Taeyong smiles, closing his eyes. The sun casts an orange glow on the inside of his eyelids, but it doesn’t bother him too much. He listens to the sounds of Johnny moving around a bit next to him, of the neighbors around them still in their own backyards with the early summer heat, and he wants to freeze this moment in a frame. 

He knows he can’t though. He hears a soft whine from Mark on the ground and when he opens his eyes he can see Mark’s face scrunch into one of annoyance, his mouth already open to let out his first wail. 

Taeyong puts his glass down and leans over to pick Mark up from the ground. He balances him on his lap, putting his small feet down on his thighs, and holding his tiny hands as Mark stands there. He looks confused, his need to cry long forgotten, and Johnny chuckles before leaning in to place a kiss on Mark’s chubby cheek. 

“We should get you in bed, shouldn’t we?” Taeyong whispers, his nose almost touching Mark’s. Mark’s answer is a sweet smile, his eyes crinkling as he does so, and Taeyong wonders what he did in his past life to deserve such a sweetheart of a son. “What does daddy say?” 

Taeyong makes eye contact with Johnny, and the other pretends to think for a little bit. “Yes, daddy agrees.” 

They go through the movements of getting Mark ready for bed. Taeyong helps him into his romper for the night as Johnny makes sure his stuffed animals are all in his bed, and before Taeyong knows it, Mark is nestled in his bed without too much fuss. Some nights Mark refuses to sleep this easily, throws a bit of a tantrum, but he seems content just laying there as of now. 

Johnny settles into the chair next to the crib, book in hand, and Taeyong decides to sit down on the ground, too. Johnny raises his eyebrow at him but doesn’t ask and instead focuses on the book, opening it on the first page. 

Taeyong’s hand finds one of Mark’s feet through the wooden bars, holding it as Johnny begins to talk. “Once upon a time there lived a girl named Ella—”

Taeyong has experienced many birthdays in his life. The ones from ages one to five he can barely remember, but he knows his parents always tried to make it one of the best days of the year. When Taeyong turned seven he got the teddy bear he had wanted for the longest time, and when he turned sixteen his parents gave him the promise of paying for his driving classes once he turned old enough.

His birthdays were always days where he was surrounded by his friends and family. He was allowed to ask his friends to come and on his birthday, his world of friends and family mixed together. Taeyong remembers his birthdays as days he enjoyed a lot, despite the fact that they meant he got older. 

When he went off to college, though, things changed. He had friends with him for his birthday and he would skype his parents. He would receive a gift in the mail from both his parents and his sister and when he went home for the summer holidays they would host a small party with grandparents and aunts and uncles. The affair became smaller as Taeyong got older, and he never really minded it. 

Like now, when Mark’s birthday is only a month or so away, it’s easy to forget that today is his very own birthday. They have been so caught up with making Mark’s first birthday a good day, Taeyong hadn’t actually taken the time to sit down and think about his own birthday. 

He sighs to himself as he looks at the ceiling. He can hear Johnny stir next to him, still asleep and far away somewhere in his dreams, and Taeyong finds himself smiling to himself. Last year his birthday hadn’t been such a big deal — their friends had come over during the day for cake and presents and Johnny had taken him out to dinner at their favorite restaurant. It had been small, but Taeyong had liked it. 

His parents nor his sister are coming over for this one, either, and Taeyong understands. They’re already driving down for Mark’s birthday in a month, and Taeyong doesn’t want to burden them more by having them drive down twice in such a short amount of time. 

Taeyong has no idea whether Johnny has something planned that he doesn’t know about. Taeyong likes surprises, he really does, but not knowing a surprise is coming makes it more nerve-wrecking sometimes. Johnny can be extravagant with his surprises, from sudden amusement park dates to spontaneous trips to places Taeyong has always wanted to visit, and Taeyong finds himself hoping that won’t be the case this time.

He knows, deep down, that a spontaneous trip is out of the question with Mark as young as he is. Taeyong doubts that Johnny wants Mark to stay with their friends for a couple of days while they travel, especially now, and so that leaves Taeyong sighing in relief as the realisation hits that Johnny can’t go all out this time. 

Johnny’s love is big, has always been big. Johnny is open and loud when it comes to his love and he finds it easy to talk about. He doesn’t hide anything, chooses to be an open book to Taeyong, and at first such a thing was overwhelming. Taeyong wasn’t sure how to deal with that as a college student, but he found his way. And he is so happy that he has found his way, found the proper way to live with Johnny’s lively adoration that he radiates by simply looking at Taeyong and now Mark, too. Because if Taeyong hadn’t, he wouldn’t have the life that he has now, and that thought is terrifying at best. 

He turns around in bed, facing Johnny’s sleeping face, and he reaches out to touch. He caresses Johnny’s cheek with his thumb, cupping his face, and Taeyong smiles when even in his sleep, Johnny leans into the touch. 

In all his years of birthdays, of smiles and congratulations and all the memories he has made on this day each and every year, his favorite remains simply waking up to Johnny like this. They do so almost every morning, curled up next to one another underneath the sheets, but Taeyong thinks it’s even more special on their birthdays.

He remembers Johnny’s birthday this year, how they had celebrated with friends and drank in their living room. How Kun, Ten, Jaehyun and Doyoung had found a sitter and how they went to dinner as a group. That was Johnny’s favorite way of spending his birthday; surrounded by those he loved the entire day, bathing in their love and basking in their presence. 

Johnny’s birthday had been a couple days before they got the call about Mark, and Taeyong smiles at the thought. Never in their wildest dreams had they thought that they would be getting that call so soon, and Taeyong stills thinks it’s a late birthday present for Johnny from the universe. A gift that Johnny has wanted ever since they graduated college and perhaps far before that. 

The baby monitor crackles, and Taeyong turns his face to look at it on his bedside table. He can’t see Mark — they are not that fancy — but he holds his breath and listens. When the first babble leaves Mark’s lips, Taeyong carefully gets out of the bed and walks out of their room and down the hall as quietly as he can. 

Mark greets him with a smile that lights up Taeyong’s heart. He grabs him out of his bed and gets a soft giggle in return. Taeyong settles Mark on his hip and Mark leans his head against Taeyong’s shoulder, relaxing in his hold. Taeyong still can’t quite believe how big Mark has gotten in the months that they have had them, but he’s healthy and growing and Taeyong adores him with every fibre of his being. 

He walks back out into the hallway with Mark and carefully takes the stairs, step by step. Mark settles into his chair without much of a fuss to Taeyong’s surprise, but he isn’t one to question such a blessing as he leaves Mark in his chair, facing the kitchen so that he can keep tabs on him as he cooks.

Johnny isn’t going to be happy that Taeyong made his own breakfast on his birthday, but Taeyong shakes that thought off as soon as it pops up in his head. Johnny has been busy the past few days, working on a project for one of his clients that he can’t seem to get quite right, and Taeyong wants him to rest. 

And so he starts preparing breakfast. He pops the rice into the cooker and sets the timer before preparing some of the side dishes, cooking the meat just right and cutting up some vegetables. When Mark reaches out to him, Taeyong hands Mark a piece of cucumber. Mark seems satisfied with that, munching on the vegetable with his eyes wide, and Taeyong smiles. He caresses Mark’s chubby cheek with his finger before turning back to the stove, focusing on breakfast. 

About twenty minutes pass and the kitchen fills with the scent of the spices Taeyong uses. Mark gets a little more restless as Taeyong works and he moves him to the playpen they had ordered for him a few weeks ago. Mark settles down without a fuss in that too, and Taeyong sighs in relief. Perhaps it’s a birthday miracle. 

When Taeyong turns back to the kitchen, he hears movement upstairs. He rushes to the stove to turn it off and take the meat off, scooping the rice into the bowls he had prepared. He puts the side dishes on the dining table and when he hears Johnny’s footsteps come down the stairs, he turns around so that Johnny can see him. 

“Good morning handsome.” Taeyong whispers and Johnny pouts. 

“It’s your birthday, I was supposed to make breakfast.” 

Taeyong shrugs, making his way over to his very disgruntled looking boyfriend. “I wanted you to sleep more. That’s my birthday present.” 

Johnny huffs but accepts the kiss Taeyong presses to his lips, wrapping his arms around Taeyong’s waist and pulling him close. Taeyong giggles, shaking his head when he feels Johnny’s hands draw circles on his waist. “Fine. But no more cooking or chores for you today. Leave those to me.” 

Taeyong wants to protest but he knows that Johnny won’t let it go, and so he nods. He allows for Johnny to pull him to the dining table and watches as Johnny grabs Mark from the playpen, kissing him good morning before putting him down in his chair once more. 

Before Mark can start complaining and flailing his arms around, Taeyong puts the smallest of the bowls of rice in front of him. Mark shuts his mouth almost comically, his hands reaching out for the bowl, and Taeyong chuckles. “Just like your dad.”

Johnny chuckles as he sits down in his own chair. “Food is always the answer. He’s a quick learner.” 

Taeyong rolls his eyes. “He’s going to be just as bad as you are.”

Johnny shrugs, “We’ll just have to feed him all the time.” 

“What do we have planned for today?” Taeyong asks when breakfast is almost done, interrupting Johnny’s conversation with Mark. It isn’t much of a conversation, just Mark babbling to Johnny and Johnny humming along, and it’s as precious as it sounds. 

Johnny smiles, “Well. You’re going to get dressed and then we’re taking Mark to Kun and Ten’s place for the day—-”

“What?” Taeyong asks, his eyes going wide. They’ve only had a handful of days without Mark, when both of them needed to go to the office or Johnny thought of something for date night that didn’t involve a baby, and Taeyong still doesn’t like leaving Mark. 

Johnny raises an eyebrow, “You look like I just told you we’d sacrifice Mark to the gods or something. I didn’t say Yuta and Jungwoo, babe. He’s been with Ten and Kun before.”

Taeyong hums, moving his gaze from Johnny down to his plate. He can’t exactly explain the feeling in his chest, the sudden sadness of not having Mark with him on his birthday. “I know, I know.” 

“Besides, it’s only for a couple hours. We’re having dinner at Kun and Ten’s place tonight with everyone, so Mark will be there too.” The feeling in Taeyong’s chest dissipates at that, and he nods. 

“What are we going to do?” 

Johnny shakes his head, “That’s a surprise.” 

Taeyong huffs, turning to Mark. “Your daddy is mean.”

Mark just looks at him, shoveling another handful of sticky rice into his mouth. Johnny chuckles, “Same, little man, same.”

Johnny urges Taeyong to go and get dressed while he cleans up, and Taeyong listens only after Johnny gives him a kiss. He listens to Johnny talking to Mark as he walks upstairs and he smiles, his heart settling in his chest. 

Mark’s birthday rolls around with the same ease as how summer comes each and every year. The sun is high in the sky every morning they wake and it doesn’t go down until deep in the night, the heat enveloping the house like a blanket Taeyong can’t shed. 

The house is filled with laughter and voices. Mark’s visitors are sitting scattered around the living room and dining area, talking among themselves. Chenle and Jeno are in their own makeshift playpen, giggling at one another, and Taeyong watches them with a smile on his face as he sips his soda. 

Mark is in his crib again, exhausted from an entire day of socializing, and Taeyong knows that Kun, Ten, Doyoung and Jaehyun will have to leave soon, too. His parents are already at their hotel for the night and Taeyong has to go see them off tomorrow afternoon, but he doesn’t need to worry about that for now. 

Instead, he shifts a bit closer on the small sofa they had put out on the deck, looking through the opened sliding door into the house. Some of Johnny and Taeyong’s coworkers are here, drinking and talking among themselves, and Taeyong smiles as he feels Johnny place a kiss on his cheek. 

The party had been a success. Once Taeyong’s mother, father and sister had arrived and Johnny’s parents had called through skype and everyone was together, they showed the videos Johnny had gathered over the past few months. Naturally, Taeyong hadn’t been able to keep his eyes dry. Mark has grown so quickly and everyone had seemed to agree, tissues being handed left and right.

After that it had only been a short while until the rest of the guests arrived and Johnny had turned on the grill. Taeyong had loved it, walking around and making sure everyone ate and drank enough, and he even lathered Jeno and Chenle with sunblock before they were allowed to play again. 

He now watches as Jeno is snuggled up on Jaehyun’s chest, his eyes drooping closed every so often before he snaps them open again. Chenle lays on the couch, Ten’s hand on his small foot as he talks to one of Taeyong’s co-workers, and Taeyong smiles. Soon, when Mark is a bit older, he imagines he will be just like that. Ten is protective over Chenle, has been since the day they officially adopted him, and Taeyong can’t blame him. 

Chenle had been very young when Kun and Ten adopted him, just like Mark, but Chenle has his own reason to be abandoned like that. Just like Mark, Chenle was dropped off at an anonymous facility, but soon enough the people there realized that Chenle wasn’t one hundred percent healthy. He has a lung condition, one that isn’t fatal but requires care, and Taeyong supposes his biological parents couldn’t deal with that. 

Kun and Ten can, though. They don’t complain when Chenle has to go to the hospital for his monthly check-up and when Chenle throws a fuss because of his medicine, they are calm and collected. Taeyong knows, though, that his friends are worried sometimes, but the doctor has told them time and time again that Chenle can live a long and healthy life with his condition. 

Taeyong can’t imagine what it’s like, though. He can’t imagine the pain of having to see your baby be in pain or crying over medication he doesn’t want. Mark is healthy, fortunately, and Taeyong never wants to experience the things that Ten and Kun have. 

He looks to the side to where Johnny sits next to him, the other’s eyes focused on Jeno as he lays on Jaehyun’s chest. Taeyong can almost hear Johnny’s thoughts, and he giggles. “Soon enough he’ll be old enough, Johnny.” 

Johnny huffs next to him, shaking his head as if Taeyong’s words had taken him out of some sort of trance. “I know. He’s already growing so fast.” 

Taeyong hums, looking down at his glass of wine. Soon enough he will be old enough for school — Taeyong knows they have three years left to go for that — and daycare, and before they know it Mark will no longer want to hug them or have Johnny read him to sleep. Taeyong closes his eyes as his wine swirls in his glass, trying his hardest to get rid of the melancholy thoughts. 

“One year already.” 

“Before we know it he’ll be nineteen and off to college.” 

Taeyong scoffs, as if he hadn’t been thinking the same thing merely seconds before that. “Slow down, babe.”

Johnny smiles, his eyes in the living room once more. “As long as time does that, too.” 

Taeyong finds Johnny’s hand and he squeezes it gently, their fingers intertwining like a natural response. Before Taeyong can say anything else, Yuta and Jungwoo make their way outside. Soon enough Kun, Ten and Chenle follow, the young boy awake once more. Doyoung and Jaehyun take a bit of time to get outside, Jeno now in Doyoung’s arms, and Taeyong watches as Chenle tries to get Jeno’s attention.

Instead, he’s taken in hand by one of his father’s and pulled on top of Kun’s lap. Chenle seems dissatisfied with it for a few seconds before he slumps down, allowing for Kun to press the small boy against his chest. “God, you guys look love sick.” 

Taeyong turns his head to look at Yuta, who is looking at Doyoung and Jaehyun as they fuss over Jeno for a bit. “If you had one for yourself you would know why.” 

Yuta blinks at Ten’s words before shaking his head. “I’m not made to have kids.” 

Jungwoo’s hand finds its way onto Yuta’s thigh, but Yuta doesn’t seem to pay it any mind for now. Taeyong frowns, “What makes you say that?”

Yuta may not be the most responsible out of all of them, but Taeyong knows that Yuta would be an excellent dad if he really wants to be one. Yuta shrugs, “You’re all so good at this. I doubt I could.” 

“Baby, that’s not true. You’re amazing with Hyejin.” Taeyong hasn’t seen Yuta with Jungwoo’s little cousin first hand, but he can’t imagine Jungwoo would lie about something like that. He loves Hyejin to death and if Yuta didn’t behave around her, Taeyong knows that Jungwoo wouldn’t allow the two of them in the same room ever again. 

“Yes, but we see her maybe once or twice every two weeks. That’s different.” 

“Not really,” Kun starts. Chenle stirs in his lap, his eyes drooping again, and Ten is quick to wipe away a bit of gunk around Chenle’s nose with a wipe. Taeyong sees Yuta follow the movement with his eyes. “It’s different in the sense that yes, having your own kid requires a bit more responsibility and the knowledge that you’re in it for life, but the way you treat children that aren’t your own is also incredibly important.” 

Yuta merely shrugs, and Taeyong rolls his eyes. “Jungwoo, do you want kids?”

Jungwoo doesn’t even seem caught off-guard by that question. Yuta does, however, and he eyes Taeyong as if he had just told him that the Japanese soccer club wouldn’t be participating in the world championship. “I do, yes.”

Johnny is the one to pipe up this time. “Yuta, do you want children?” 

Yuta shrugs, his eyes finding Jeno snuggled into Doyoung’s chest. Doyoung raises an eyebrow at him, shaking his head. “Am I the only one who remembers Yuta saying he wanted to have kids ever since we got into college?”

Yuta groans, shaking his head. “I was a kid myself still.”

“So were we, and look at us now.” Jaehyun says, pointing at where Jeno is now vastly asleep on Doyoung’s lap. Yuta doesn’t seem all that convinced but before either of them can say anything else, Chenle lets out a whimper. 

Ten sighs, “I think we’ll have to continue this conversation later, when Chenle has had his beauty sleep.” 

They all say their goodbyes and Jaehyun and Doyoung opt to leave too, leaving Johnny and Taeyong to walk with the six of them to the front door. Taeyong hugs his friends goodbye and kisses both Chenle and Jeno on the head before he allows them to leave, waving as their cars drive off. 

Soon enough, more guests decide it’s time to leave. Taeyong tells his co-workers to get home safe and that he’ll see them soon and Johnny wishes some of his a goodnight and before they know it, Jungwoo and Yuta are the only ones still left. 

They sit on the porch, drinks in hand, while Johnny and Taeyong clean. Taeyong can’t exactly hear their conversation, their voices too muffled, but every time he comes closer Johnny gives him a look that makes Taeyong wander off to clean something else. 

“Yuta would be a good dad.” Taeyong says when Johnny and him are standing in the kitchen, dropping the last of the garbage into the trash can. Johnny hums, a new glass of wine in his hand.

“He would be. He just has to realize that himself.”

Taeyong scoffs before taking a step forward and snatching Johnny’s glass out of his hand. Johnny gasps when he takes a sip, but Taeyong pays it no mind. “By the time he’s realized that he’ll be too old.” 

Johnny shrugs, “So they adopt a teenager.”

Taeyong raises an eyebrow, “Yuta with a teenager?”

Johnny chuckles, “Babe if they have a kid that kid will become a teenager one day.” 

Taeyong shakes his head. “I know that!” 

The thought of Mark being a teenager makes something in his chest sink, but he tries to push it away. According to Sooyoung and several others, dreading the fact that your child is getting older is normal. Taeyong had guessed it wouldn’t come this quick, though. “Good. Now, we have another two bottles of wine to finish and I heard Jungwoo say they will call a taxi to drive home. What do you say?”

Taeyong checks the baby monitor, hearing only silence, and he nods. “Fine. Let’s get Yuta drunk and convince him he’ll be a great dad.” 

Summer turns into autumn and autumn turns into winter. The leaves go from a beautiful green to orange and on the ground until they fully disappear, hidden under a pile of snow. The scenery outside becomes almost too beautiful to handle and when the snow is thick enough, Johnny demands they take Mark out to go sledding in the park close by.

Taeyong agrees and decides to make an entire day out of it. He texts Kun and Doyoung, asking whether Chenle and Jeno want to come too, and he notifies Yuta that the kids are coming too when the other man texts him Jungwoo and him will be coming too.

Johnny’s energy makes it easier to forget that Mark is still a small baby, that with his year and three months he might be bigger than when they got him but that he is still a baby. The thought of Mark sledding down a hill, even while Johnny holds onto him, is a terrifying thought. 

The night before their eventful day, when Johnny walks back into the living room after reading Mark a story to sleep, Taeyong manages to get the words out. “What if something goes wrong?” 

Johnny stops dead in his tracks in the middle of the living room, one hand finding the bookcase. He raises an eyebrow. “What?”

Taeyong huffs but he doesn’t roll his eyes. Instead, he turns his head to the window that shows their backyard. The snow is thick, nearly too much for the beginning of December, but before Taeyong can think about the fact that this is one of the consequences from global warming and the fact that Mark will have to grow up in a world full of those consequences, he shakes himself out of it. “What if Mark gets hurt while sledding?” 

Johnny sighs. “He can get hurt in the house, too.” 

Taeyong bites his lip. He knows Johnny is right, that Mark won’t be in much more danger when the two of them are close by, but he can’t shake the feeling. “I know. I ju—”

“Baby, we’ll be there every second. We have Kun, Ten, Doyoung, Jaehyun and even Yuta and Jungwoo on stand-by. Nothing bad will happen to him.” Johnny’s words reach Taeyong’s ears and he hears them, but the feeling in his chest doesn’t go away. He sighs. 

“I know, I’m sorry.”

Johnny rushes forward, crouching down in front of Taeyong where he sits on the couch. “No, baby, don’t be sorry. I don’t want anything to happen to him either, but we need to learn that sometimes things happen.” 

Taeyong hates that thought. Johnny doesn’t necessarily mean now, for Mark is still far too young, but he means in the future. When Mark is in school, perhaps wants to try his hand at a sport or something of the like, and they won’t be there to always protect him. Mark will get hurt in his life, many times, and Taeyong hates that he can’t do anything to stop it. “I know love. It just —”

“I’m sure my mother has told you this story before, but when I was two I—”

Taeyong rolls his eyes, taking hold of Johnny’s hands where they had lay on his thighs. “You used the slide in your backyard and landed on your head. I know.” 

Johnny snorts, shaking his head. “Nothing is safe when it comes to my mom. The word ‘secret’ doesn’t belong in her dictionary.” 

Taeyong giggles, remembering just how many stories Johnny’s mother had shared of her son when they first started dating. Johnny’s mother has always been loose lipped, not quite caring about what other people think of her or her family, and Taeyong has a few of those stories memorized for when he needs a good laugh. He can only imagine how stupid Johnny must have looked when he was nine years old and his shoelace got stuck in his bike. It must have hurt, according to Johnny’s version of the story, but Taeyong likes the thought of Johnny looking like a right idiot far more. “You’re right. About both things.”

Johnny chuckles, shaking his head. “My mom aside, everything will be fine tomorrow. And when he gets older, things will be fine too. We have to let him figure things out by himself, you know?”

Taeyong hums, nodding. He doesn’t really want to think about the days where Mark is gone for several hours on end, hanging out at school and meeting new people that could potentially hurt him, and so he pushes those thoughts away for now. Instead, he tries to conjure the image of Mark in his stroller, his hands grasping at the snowflakes that had fluttered down to the ground a couple days before. “I love you.”

Johnny smiles before leaning in, placing a kiss against Taeyong’s lips. Taeyong leans into the touch, the warmth that Johnny always carries with him, and he smiles into the kiss. “I love you too, my love.”

When Johnny pulls away and sits back beside Taeyong, Taeyong turns to look at him. “We should bring the camera.” 

Johnny’s eyes go wide. “Oh definitely. I’ll put it on the charger before we go to bed.” 

Taeyong smiles. They have a bunch of pictures that Taeyong needs to put into an album, still, and once he has an entire sunday to do such a thing he definitely will, but for now they are safely placed in an old shoebox along with Mark’s adoption papers and a letter Johnny and Taeyong had written for him the day before they went to pick him up.

Taeyong forgets it exists sometimes. He doesn’t exactly remember what it says, but Johnny and he plan to give it to Mark when they explain to him that they are not Mark’s biological parents, that they have no idea who his mother is but that they love him all the same. Taeyong only remembers that he couldn’t stop rambling about how excited he was and he hopes that when Mark reads it, he’ll feel Taeyong’s excitement through the paper. 

He shakes the thought of the letter, turning back to the television. A cooking competition Taeyong has seen a handful of times plays on the screen, and he yawns. He feels Johnny snake his arm around his shoulders and Taeyong leans his head against Johnny’s chest. “He’s going to have so much fun.”

Taeyong hums. They'd gone sledding with Chenle and Jeno before last December, and they had loved it. Taeyong can only hope the two boys will enjoy it just as much this time, too. “With Chenle and Jeno, too.”

Johnny shifts, making Taeyong lean forward so that Johnny can remove his arm. Before he can ask what’s wrong, Johnny opens his mouth. “Would you—”

Taeyong closes his eyes, taking Johnny’s hand in his. He knows Johnny has always wanted a big family, preferably four kids, but he also knows that realistically, that’s simply not possible. But, he nods anyway, because Taeyong also wants more children. “I would, yeah. Not now — but we’re still in the database. Maybe when Mark is a bit older.”

Johnny positively lights up, his smile almost blinding, and Taeyong smiles back at him. “Oh that makes me so happy.”

Taeyong hums, “The thought of finding Mark a brother or sister, whether they’re older than him or not — I love it.”

Johnny takes Taeyong’s hand in his, and he squeezes. “Me too, baby, me too. Now, though, I think we should get ready for bed because we have a little boy to entertain all day tomorrow.”

Taeyong groans, but they both know he’s only joking. Taeyong can’t wait to spend his day with his friends and his favorite children in the whole world. He places a kiss on Johnny’s cheek before turning the television off, leading the way upstairs.