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Cullen Rutherford had three simple rules. One, don’t get closer than polite friendliness with mages. Two, avoid lyrium at all costs. And three: try not to get close to anyone.

They sounded simple enough, at least one and three did. Lyrium was a whole other issue but at least Cullen knew what he was getting into with that. However, when Cassandra brought the Dalish girl back from sealing the Rift, it quickly became clear that Helia Lavellan would change that. The tiny mage seemed so curious about everything and everyone in Haven. He had observed her asking Solas about his adventures in the Fade, Varric about Hawke, Cassandra about the Inquisition. He hadn’t yet been approached by her, and he was relieved. 

“Commander?”

Nevermind. 

Turning around he faced Helia, surprised to see her looking at him in curiosity and innocence. Varric had explained he was a former Templar, hadn’t he? “If it’s alright, do you mind if I ask you a few questions? I heard you were a Templar but my Keeper only ever said to avoid them but never why. What exactly is a Templar? Also, how are you faring? Do you enjoy your job?” She asked, not seeming to notice her barrage of questions. Cullen had to take a second to collect himself. She 

knew he was a Templar but didn’t seem afraid or angry. “Uh, I’m doing well, thank you. Yes, I enjoy my position as commander.” He stopped to consider how to explain his former order. It was clear she knew they weren’t the best to mages at the very least. “A Templar is a knight loyal to the Chantry. Our main duty was to monitor and guard the mages that lived in the Circle we were assigned to. Using our skills and abilities we prevented the use of blood magic and the possibility of mages becoming abominations.” 

As he spoke, Cullen felt himself tense at the mention of blood magic. After all this time the mere mention of them caused part of him to panic. Pushing down the thoughts, he continued. “We take vows once our training is complete and are given our first draught of lyrium.” The mage tilted her head at the mention of vows. “Vows? Like ‘I vow to be loyal to the Chantry, to give up material objects, to be chaste’, that sorta thing?” 

Cullen nodded. “In a sense. We don’t take vows of chastity, if that’s what you mean. While some do, we mainly promise to give up some desires that would distract us from our duty.” “So did you take a vow of chastity?” She asked. Maker, how did she keep a straight face asking that?! 

The man’s cheeks turned a bright shade of red. “N-No, I didn’t. Can we change the subject please?” He pleaded, rubbing the back of his neck. Helia nodded, smiling a bit. Did she get him flustered on purpose? Varric probably put her up to this. When Cullen got his hands of that dwarf-

“You alright there?”

“Uh, um, yes. I’m fine! Perfectly fine!” 

She looked doubtful but nodded, listening as he spoke about the state of the Inquisition’s forces. Cutting himself off from a rant, he looked at her sheepishly. “Sorry about that. I doubt you came here for a lecture.”

“Not really, but I’d love to hear it if you have one prepared!” 

Chuckling at her enthusiasm, he gave her a small smile. “Another time, perhaps.” He replied. She only answered with a wide smile, flustering him once again. Why did this keep happening to him?! 

“I should be going. I need to find Cassandra so we can head off to the Hinterlands with Varric and Solas. They’re probably wondering what happened to me.” With that, she wandered off in Cassandra’s direction. Maker help him, she was skipping !

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The next time they spoke was at the War Table. After what occurred at Val Royeaux and the discovery of Tevintar forces in Redcliffe, Helia had decided that siding with the mages was the best option. If they ended up not agreeing to help, then at the very least the Inquisition could look into what was happening there. Cullen was against this seeing as in order for their agents to get in, she would have to go in as bait. “You don’t have to be bait. We can still go with the Templars.” He argued, crossing his arms in front of his chest. The Herald was silent for a moment, and Cullen began to hope she had seen his side. 

“We have to do this. The fact that a foreign nation has essentially enslaved the mages isn’t something we should ignore. Plus, it seems Fiona was tricked into allying with Alexius.” Helia finally said after several moments of tense silence. Cullen wanted to object, to beg her to go with the Templars, that if they allied with the mages who knew what could go wrong- but the look on the elf’s face silenced anything he could say. 

“Cullen.” 

He was startled at the sound of his name. Leliana was holding a report out to him. “King Alistair is reported to be heading to Redcliffe. There are reports that Tevintar assassins are waiting to potentially take out Fereldan royalty on top of what is happening. We need someone familiar with him to warn him.” She said, explaining what her agents had discovered. 

Alistair.

The Commander’s mind flashed with memories of the Grey Warden now king. Their friendship and rivalry, and their last encounter. The last time they spoke was outside the Circle in Kinloch, where the two nearly came to blows over the fate of the mages inside. Had Suranna not stopped them-

“Cullen? You don’t have to. We should be able to deal with this before he arrives.” Helia mentioned, a hand on his arm. She was looking at him worriedly, her blue eyes soft and clear. “No. I’ll go.”

He didn’t get a chance to say good luck when the Herald left with the Tevintar mage Dorian. Varric gave him a thumbs up that this would be alright. All Cullen could do was ride off in hopes he intercepted Alistair before he reached Redcliffe. 

Alistair, surprisingly, had long since forgiven Cullen. In fact, upon seeing his old friend the king had jumped off his horse to greet him, a smile on his face. The two made their way to Redcliffe together, aware of the danger but also at ease knowing the other would make sure they made it out of a fight. The king seemed to sense that Kirkwall was an extremely sensitive topic and avoided it, instead going on about how much he wished he could be traveling around on adventures again. Cullen was grateful for this. Most people asked him about what happened in the Free Marches.

For some reason, Helia refused to look him in the eye when they arrived in Redcliffe. The magister was arrested and the mages allied with. While he was against a full alliance, Cassandra brought up the fact that they went there to gain the mages’ aid and had achieved that, so who cared how Helia went about it.

But that wasn’t why she was avoiding him. Dorian gave him a quick rundown of what they had seen in the future, and a hint as to why she was avoiding him- they had seen Cullen in the future, and it wasn’t good. He refused to explain any further.

“It’s not for me to tell, Commander. Helia asked me not to, and I always keep my promises. You should know, however, that she was quite traumatized by the sight. She cares deeply for you. You are one of her first and closest friends here, and probably the only one who seems to enjoy her millions of questions. Other than myself and probably Solas, of course.” 

That is what led Cullen to Helia’s hut the night before they attempted to seal the Breach. Taking a deep breath, he knocked on her door. A soft “come in” responded and he opened the door and entered. The mage sat on her bed, hugging her knees to her chest. Upon seeing Cullen she stiffened, tears welling in her eyes. “Oh, hello Commander..... I guess I owe you an explanation for avoiding you, huh…” He shook his head before sitting on the edge of her bed. “No. You don’t. Whatever I did or said in the future does not reflect who I am now. That’s all that matters.” She sniffed, wiping some tears from her face. “Cullen I… I killed you in that future! They infected you with red lyrium! You were in agonizing pain yet still cared that we were alive and wanted to help us…. But you and Leliana were cut down when the portal opened and it was my fault!!”  The mage let out a sob and buried her face in her hands. Cullen didn’t know what to do. She was clearly traumatized by what had happened at Redcliffe, that much was true. He awkwardly rubbed her back, waiting for her to calm down before saying anything. This seemed to comfort the woman, as her sobs soon faded into hiccups and a runny nose.

“Thanks… I n-needed that.” She managed out. He simply nodded in response. 

“You know, you shouldn’t blame yourself for what happened in that future. And you did not kill me. I chose to fight in order to give you time to return here. We will make sure that future never comes to pass.” He said softly. She looked at him with red tired eyes and Cullen wanted nothing more than to prevent the horrible future she had been to. She was so small , so fragile. Like the slightest touch would break her. 

“I promise you that. You should rest and sleep. We march to the Breach first thing tomorrow, Herald.” He moved to stand when she grabbed his hand. “...Helia. Please, call me Helia. All this ‘Herald’ stuff unnerves me. I’m no Herald.” She said softly. The man nodded and smiled faintly. “Alright. Goodnight…. Helia.”

Redcliffe Castle was dark and empty, the only light coming from the occasional torch and the red lyrium growing from the walls. Helia shivered, trying to not think about the possibility of people once standing where it grew. She wished they could’ve saved Fiona from such a fate, but she was too far gone. Varric and Cassandra had a haze of red around them that signified they were infected as well. They were dying a slow and agonizing death, all because of her . Because she wasn’t here to seal the Breach, to stop this so-called ‘Elder One’. She had failed everyone. 

A familiar voice came from a nearby room. “I already…. Told you…. I’d rather die than help you…”

Cullen! He was still alive! Helia had to try and save him, to try and make up for this dark future that came to be because she was thrown into the future. Leliana tried to stop her but the mage pushed past, opening the door. Venatori mages stood in front of a hunched figure chained to the floor. The men turned at the sound of the door only to be struck down with flames and lightning. Cullen looked up from where he kneeled on the cold stone floor. Helia felt her heart drop at the sight of dark circles under his eyes, of the red haze surrounding him, of how gaunt he looked. A weak, sad smile crossed his face at the sight of the group. 

A smile she again saw just before demons burst through the door of Alexius’ chambers, just before he and Leliana were cut down as the portal opened. Dorian had to drag her through as she tried to rush forward, to try and save her friends. She had to-

She awoke with a cry, hand reaching out towards the ceiling. She took a deep breath, then another. She was in Haven. Her friends were alive, the dark future could still be averted, the Breach would be closed. She had to make sure of it.

Chapter Text

The operation to seal the Breach had gone smoothly- too smoothly. They should’ve known nothing goes this easily for them. With an invading army of Templars and an Archdemon heading directly for Haven, Helia had chosen to go out and cause an avalanche to- hopefully- stop them and give the Inquisition a chance to escape. Cullen regretted agreeing to this plan the moment the doors closed behind her. Their last conversation kept echoing through his mind.

“But what of your escape?”

She didn’t answer, instead giving him a small, sad smile. 

“Perhaps you’ll surprise it… find a way…”

“... Keep them safe, Commander.”

He should’ve volunteered to go in her place. His luck had to run out eventually, why not in Haven? And yet the look she gave him before she left stopped him. Their discussion the night before made it clear that she’d be devastated if she lost any of them. That she would blame herself. So he sent her out to what certainly was her doom. To where an Archdemon, a darkspawn monster, and Samson waited to destroy them. 

Now, as a blizzard roared around them, he stood at the edge of camp keeping watch. Helia hopefully had survived the avalanche and they all decided to wait in shifts in case she returned. It felt foolish seeing as there was no way anyone could have survived, but seeing as she survived the Conclave it made sense that she might be alive still. Cassandra shivered next to him, rubbing her arms. 

“You should rest, Cassandra. It’s not your turn after all.” 

“Oh hush. Helia risked her life for us three times now. The least I can do is wait for her. Plus you should not talk.” The Seeker gave him a look that dared him to argue with her. She had a point. Cullen had gotten little rest in the past few hours between aiding the wounded and arguing with Leliana and Josephine. Cassandra, on the other hand, had been sent back by the Herald just before triggering the avalanche. She regretted even considering listening to her, and also had gotten little rest since. “I should not have listened to her when she told us to meet up with you. Had I not started heading back, maybe when the dragon attacked I could have bought her some time-”

“Cassandra, she wouldn’t forgive herself if you died for her sake.”

“.... I hate that you’re right.”

Cullen turned back to the storm and was about to reply when he saw something. A faint, glowing green light was slowly approaching them. Soon a tiny figure came into view, slowly trudging through the snow. The Anchor glowed like a beacon from the hand held in front of them, lighting their way forward. “Lavellan!” He cried out, rushing towards the woman. Cassandra followed him after calling for a few scouts. “Thank the Maker!” 

He reached the mage just as her legs gave out. Catching her in his arms, he held her shivering body close to him. She was ice cold and covered in scrapes and bruises. Ice coated her golden hair while her lips, the tip of her nose, and the tips of her ears were a shade of blue.  He fumbled to undo his cape with one hand and wrapped it around Helia before picking her up bridal style. As he made his way back to camp, she made the occasional whimper or mumble. Clinging to him, she buried her face into his chest in what he could only assume was an attempt to shield her face from the storm.  Holding her closer to him he tried to speed up despite the strong winds attempting to push him back. Upon arriving at the camp Solas took her from his arms, frowning at the sight of the Dalish woman wrapped in his cape. Nevertheless he left it and hurried her to a tent, Dorian and Vivinne close behind. Cullen simply stood where he was left, silently praying to the Maker she was alright.

It wasn’t until several hours had passed that Mother Giselle told him that Helia was stable. “She’s asleep, but you can see her. We do need someone to watch her until she wakes up at least.” She hinted as she walked past to inform his fellow advisors of the Herald’s condition. Cullen ducked into the tent and relaxed. She had regained some color and was snuggled under his cape in what appeared to be a deep sleep. After the past day, she deserved it. They all did. But he couldn’t rest until they found somewhere safe to regroup and discuss their next move. 

He took a seat on the stool next to her cot and sighed. They had a long road ahead of them...

Chapter Text

Skyhold was a vast improvement to Haven. It was much larger, easily defendable- much more fitting to their needs. It needed repairs, but it wasn’t too bad. Cullen had already claimed a tower as his office and quarters, but until it was repaired he was working from a makeshift desk out in the courtyard. 

Helia was close by helping the wounded. Despite being named Inquisitor, she insisted on being hands-on with the refugees and inhabitants of Skyhold. Cullen was happy to see she was returning to her happy, curious nature after the events at Redcliffe and Haven.  She was currently talking with Cole about how he helped people as they died. Personally the commander was unnerved by the boy, but if Helia trusted him, he’d do his best to trust him. 

Speaking of the Inquisitor, she had made her way over to him. “Ah, Inquisitor! It’s good to see you.” He said as she stopped by his desk. She smiled at him in response. “It’s good to see you as well, Cullen, but I thought we talked about the title thing. I came over to thank you about Haven.” 

He already felt his face heat up. “It was nothing, Inquisit- Helia. Getting everyone out alive was my top priority.” Including you . She simply nodded, a faint blush crossing her face. “Thank you, Cullen. Our escape from Haven… it was close. I’m relieved that you — that so many made it out.” Helia corrected herself mid-sentence, her blush growing deeper. The former templar couldn’t help but think she was adorable in that moment. “As am I.” He replied with a smile. 

“B-But I was referring to when you a-and Cassandra found me afterwards. Vivienne told me that you nearly froze because you refused to take your cape back until after I finally woke up. I…. Thank you for saving my life, Commander.” Her blush deeping as her sky blue eyes looked away from his. Cullen immediately felt his cheeks flush. 

Following her discovery, Cullen had refused to take his cape back as it was being used to warm the near-frozen elf. He already was rather resistant to the cold, but he managed to catch a small cold. Luckily, they had discovered Skyhold prior to it becoming serious. The entire time since her discovery, Solas had been giving him a dirty look. He wrote it off as the apostate being overprotective of the Inquisitor, and likely blamed him for not doing more to stop her from confronting Corepheus. Varric was of the opinion that the elf was jealous of how close Helia was to him, but Cullen wrote that off to Varric’s author's brain. Not everything was as dramatic as a story for Maker’s sake!

Speaking of her inner circle, Blackwall had not so subtly threatened him that if she ever wanted to do something like that ever again and Cullen let her, and it resulted in her being injured or worse, the Warden would personally throw him off Skyhold’s battlements (“It’s a rather long fall, Commander”). He didn’t mind the threat despite knowing the Warden was serious. Blackwall had taken on an almost fatherly role to Helia, the Inquisitor having broken through the normally gruff and reserved man’s walls.

When Cullen ran into Vivienne, she gave him a once over and made it clear that she was thankful he saved Helia from freezing to death. However, should he break her heart, the First Enchanter would break him (“She’s such a sweet girl, and you’re a fantastic knight. So you better not upset her.”). He had blushed at her words and insisted they weren’t an item, only earning a raised eyebrow in response.

Dorian was glad she had returned to her cheerful self around Cullen. He had explained what had occurred in the dark future after learning Helia had opened up about it with the Commander, noting that the Cullen of that dark future called the elf “his ray of light in the darkness”. He asked if he knew ancient Tevintar, explaining when Cullen shook his head that the feminine name for the sun was ‘Helia’. It was still a mystery as to how or why the Dalish would know of the name or even want to use it, but he had to admit it was fitting. She always seemed to brighten up anywhere she went, even when in Inquisitor mode. 

The Iron Bull pulled Cullen aside at one point and told him that while he liked him and saw Cullen as an honorable man, that he was loyal to Helia first and that if he ever sent her to her death like that again, he and the Chargers would personally deal with him. Krem simply laughed when Cullen tried to explain he didn’t want her to go buy them time; the Tevintar mercenary told Bull “I told you so, chief”.

He was pretty sure Sera was trying to poison him when she brought him a slice of cake. She explained that it was her way of thanking him for getting everyone out of Haven alive. This didn’t mean she would stop screwing with him, however. Cullen accepted that. What he didn’t accept was her teasing mention of being the Inquisitor’s “Cully-Wully”. What was with rogues and nicknames?!

Cole… Cole seemed to be content that Helia was alright. Or at least, Cullen thinks he does. The boy tended to keep to himself, and if he wasn’t he was with either Solas or Varric. The man was pretty sure Varric had basically adopted Cole, while the apostate explained that Cole was a spirit who had somehow taken human form. Either way they seemed to understand him the best. Even Helia struggled to understand the boy at times, but she also seemed to provide comfort to him.

Varric was simply thankful Helia was alive. The dwarf however, refused to stop teasing him on what he saw as a crush. Which it clearly was not- Cullen and Helia were friends, and he admired how she was able to unite so many people the way she did and her talent at breaking down the walls built around a person. That was all. Oh and her eyes. The way she smiled, her laugh, the way her magic was so elegant yet free- Oh no. Oh no Cullen DID like her. 

“It was no problem, Helia. I’d do it again if I had to.” He spoke, not realizing his words until they reached his ears. The two stood there, furiously blushing before Helia stuttered an excuse and fled, covering her face to hide her blush. Cullen stood there, smirking at her fleeing form.

Chapter Text

Cullen’s head was throbbing. His lyrium withdrawal was getting worse by the day, but if he was correct it would begin to get better soon. Hopefully. Either that or he went mad or ended up dead. Josephine’s summary of support for their cause sounded like she was underwater. His grip on the table tightened as he pleaded to the Maker that the meeting would be over soon. He wanted to leave before his weakness became too noticeable. 

It was already too late for that however. Helia was looking at him worriedly, concern etched across her face. Ever since he explained his choice to stop taking lyrium, she had taken to checking on him at least twice a day to make sure he was alright and that he’d eaten. She had even taught him how to prepare an herbal tea her clan used for migraines as a way to hopefully combat the withdrawal symptoms. He wasn’t complaining that she visited him more often- having someone care for his health and wellbeing was something he had not experienced in a very long time. And well, it was a nice excuse to spend time with her.

“Maybe we should conclude this meeting. I promised Blackwall I’d help him review the Grey Warden notes we discovered on the Storm Coast.” Helia suggested, breaking Cullen’s trance. He hadn’t realized he had been staring at her, or that the three women had become silent and had turned to him in concern. Leliana nodded, concluding the meeting and collecting her mission details to pass on to her agents before leaving with Josephine. The moment they had left Helia was by his side. “Cullen, you should rest. It’s obvious you’re not feeling well.” She suggested, staring him down. He couldn’t. Not while Samson was still out there. There was still work to be done. 

“I’m fine, Inquisitor. It's nothing I can’t handle.” He forced out. His headache was getting worse, and he suddenly felt exhausted. She simply frowned at him. Normally he’d regret his words upon seeing that. He knew using her official title annoyed her, but right now all he cared about was getting back to his office. Cullen gathered up his documents and turned to leave. 

“Commander, I order you to take the rest of the day off and rest. Our forces would not benefit from its commander being sick.”

He whipped around in shock. Helia almost never used her position as Inquisitor to order anyone to do anything, ever. She crossed her arms and smirked at him. “I’ll have Captain Rylen take over your duties for the day. If I find out you haven’t relaxed at all, then you will be on bed rest tomorrow as well. I will come check on you in an hour.”

His mouth hung open in shock, protests stuck in his throat. She was serious?! He was fine! That was when he stumbled, catching the edge of the table to catch himself. His headache was throbbing now; maybe a nap wouldn’t hurt. “Fine. I’ll rest.” He managed out through gritted teeth. She simply gave him a grin of victory.

An hour later, Cullen was laying in his bed, sweat soaking his bedsheets. While some days only consisted of migraines and urges, today was one of the worse of his withdrawal. He was afraid to attempt to sleep- after all, the nightmares were always the worst on days like today. His head turned to look at the ladder as Helia climbed up, a small backpack appearing like it would burst on her back. He sat up and immediately regretted the action as his head throbbed and body screamed from exhaustion. “I told you I’m fine.”

“And Solas likes tea. I’m not stupid, Cullen.” She slipped the bag off her back and sat on the floor by his bed, pulling things out of it. A thermos, some herbs, a blanket, some paperwork. “You need rest, and I’m not about to leave you when you have a fever from lyrium withdrawal. Don’t even try to argue that you’re fine. I can do work here and keep an eye on you while I’m at it. Wait, are you still in your armor?!” He looked down to find that he indeed was still in his armor. In his haze he must have forgotten. 

“Sit up. Let’s get you outta this so you’re more comfortable. Although I have caught you asleep at your desk in all this.” She teased, undoing the straps on his chestplate. Cullen felt his cheeks heat up immediately. Or at least, he thought he was blushing? He was so hot. “H-Helia! I’ll do it myself-”

“What? I got it. Besides, your hands are shaking.” She gently removed the chestplate and instantly he felt cooler. As she removed the rest of his armour, he felt his body relax. He hadn’t realized he had been so tense. She proceeded to gently push him back into bed, using her magic to coat her hands with ice magic to help cool him down. Her hands were so soft and gentle. Her hair had begun to come loose from her braided bun and some curls framed her face, and the way she was standing in front of the window it looked like she was surrounded by a halo of light. If Cullen hadn’t known any better, he’d think Andraste herself was caring for him. 

“Get some sleep. Please Cullen.” Helia whispered, a hand on his forehead. She went to get up and he grabbed her hand without thinking. “Wait… stay… ” She simply smiled at him before replying she wasn’t leaving, just sitting down on the floor next to his bed to get some work done. His headache was fading faintly, but he could feel sleep take him as he closed his eyes.

For the first time in a long time, he didn’t dream of the horrors he encountered. Instead, a certain Dalish mage was all he dreamed of. 

Chapter Text

Helia wasn’t one to speak much of her life prior to the Inquisition. Cullen assumed it was from the secretive nature of her people- after all, the Dalish often refused to share their knowledge with even city elves. So when she started to open up during their game of chess, he was rather surprised.

It started when he asked if she had any siblings. She was rather curious about his own siblings and seemed shocked that he even had any. He quickly learned that she didn’t have any siblings at all. Helia didn’t seem to be very close to anyone in her clan at all save her Keeper.

“I was always a rather solitary child. I was always interested in life outside my clan and often asked shemlen in the villages we traded with so many questions. While we weren’t as against knowing what humans were up to, many still frowned upon my curiosity. Especially after I became my clan’s First.”

Her normal cheerfulness had been dampened by the discussion and she didn’t object when he changed the subject. He asked about the stories of her people, about their halla, and finally, about her vallaslin . Her tattoos interested him. They were a light blue depiction of halla antlers. Helia explained that her vallaslin was of Ghilan'nain, the Halla Mother. “She was the youngest of our gods, and she gave us the halla. I think I spent more time with them than anyone else. Especially the babies!” She had a smile on her face as she spoke, and Cullen could only smile back. “She is also the goddess of navigation. Every time we send out scouts, I pray to her to guide them safely.” Helia continued. “What about your other gods?” Cullen inquired, and her smile grew as she went into detail about each of the Elven gods. By the time she finished, they had also finished their game.

“And this match is yours. I think this is the longest we’ve gone without speaking about Inquisition matters.”

“Yeah. We should do this more often.”

Cullen nodded with a smile. “I…. I’d like that.” 

“Me too.”

Part of him was surprised by her response while another part was overjoyed. He hadn’t imagined this then? This wasn’t a dream of his that he’d wake up from, this entire conversation a figment of his mind? 

“You said that…” He mumbled with a smile. She simply curiously looked at him  before nodding in response.

It wasn’t a dream.

Chapter Text

When Helia came to his office and asked if she could speak to him alone, Cullen had agreed without a second thought. Now however, as they walked on the battlements together, he couldn’t think of anything to say. “It’s uh… it’s a nice day.”

Smooth, Rutherford. Real smooth.

“What?” She stopped and looked at him in confusion.

“I… Look, you wanted to talk?” He asked, rubbing the back of his neck. How was it that whenever he was around her he acted like a complete fool?!

Helia was silent for a moment before meeting his eyes. “Cullen I feel for you but- I- Cullen could you ever feel for a mage?” She quietly asked, fidgeting with her hands. The question threw him off guard. He had never truly thought of this question. He did have feelings for Helia, that much he knew- but then again, he didn’t see her as a mage. Just as Helia. Her being able to use magic was simply part of her.  Realizing he had his answer, he nodded. “I could- I mean I do! I…. ugh I’m messing this up aren’t I… I do think of you. And what I’d say in this situation…”

“What’s stopping you?” She asked. He sighed, looking away for a moment before returning his gaze to her. 

“We’re at war, and you’re the Inquisitor. And…. I didn’t think this was possible for...” The two were close now, lips almost touching-

“Commander! I got that report you requested!”

The two flinched, quickly pulling away from one another. Cullen turned and glared at the scout standing in front of him, seemingly oblivious to what he interrupted. “What.” He hissed, very close to tossing the poor scout off the battlements. The scout, a young man named Jim, repeated himself, still looking at the papers in his hand. “The report from Lady Leliana? You said to get it to you as soon as possible-” Jim finally looked up from the report, the color draining from his face immediately. The Commander was giving him a death glare, and it was only now that he noticed the Inquisitor behind Cullen, blushing furiously. Realizing he was witness to a private moment between the two Inquisition leaders, he started backing away. “Or on your desk! I’ll g-go do that right now, ser!” The scout stuttered before fleeing back into Cullen’s office. 

“If you’re busy I-” Helia was cut off as Cullen kissed her, pulling her body against his. She leaned into the kiss, and the two only pulled away when they needed to breathe. “I’m sorry… That… that was very nice…” Cullen mumbled, his face reminiscent of a tomato. Helia smiled, her face matching his. “That… was perfect...” She replied softly.

“Well then. Let's try and repeat it then.” He smirked before leaning in for another kiss.

It wasn’t long before word spread throughout Skyhold that the two were together. Varric made quite the winnings that night, Sera grumbling that she was sure Helia would have kissed him first. The only person not celebrating was Solas. Standing outside on the battlements, he felt sadness wash over him. Why hadn’t he told her before now? Yes he had plans, but she could have been part of them. Why Cullen, of all people? Why not him?

Cole slipped back inside, unnerved by what he sensed coming from Solas. Jealousy and frustration were extremely rare emotions to come from the normally calm elf. He did not understand what jealousy meant other than he did not like it. Cole was going to have to ask Varric what it was later.

Chapter Text

Cullen would never understand Orlesians. And he wasn’t sure he’d ever want to. Entering the Winter Palace he could already feel a headache coming on. Several nobles had already noticed him, and he knew he wasn’t going to have a moment to himself already. The one person he wanted to see hadn’t entered yet, and she likely wouldn’t have a moment to herself either.

Vivienne, Leliana, and Josie had kept him from seeing Helia all day, stating they were helping her get ready. Knowing Helia, she probably never asked and wanted nothing more than to be anywhere else. He knew she didn’t understand Orlesian culture, and he was afraid of the idea of her having to play the Game. While he didn’t know much about the Empire, Cullen had some knowledge on deadly Orlesian politics that hid underneath the facade of the Game. Most nobles already looked down upon elves or saw them as exotic objects to be gawked at. It didn’t help that Inquisition scouts had discovered rumors that several nobles- including Gaspard himself- wished to have Helia’s hand in marriage in order to gain favor and power over the Inquisition. Already, Orlais was trying to get their hands on them and their “exotic yet civilized Dalish mage” (he was going to punch the man who said that).

“Well, you clean up well Commander! Not that you aren’t always handsome, but today you look like the princes from Tevinter storybooks.” Dorian teased as he walked over. Wearing a mask that was designed to look like a skull, the necromancer seemed at home. “You are rather tense however. Nervous?”

Cullen nodded. Dorian’s smile fell and he sighed, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Cullen, She’ll be fine. Helia has a way with words. Plus if anyone tries anything, Sera has a barrel of bees she can release into the ballroom.” Cullen smirked; knowing Sera she probably did have bees with her. Josephine has a lot of work tonight then. “You know, your mask is rather intricate for you. Not to be offensive, of course.” Dorian gestured towards the golden mask Cullen wore. “I know. But Helia apparently picked it out, so- quit that.” He grumbled as he began to blush, Dorian smirking at him. “Oh~ So you’re only wearing it because our beloved Inquisitor picked it out for you?” The Tevinter noble asked teasingly. “That is most likely. After all, the Commander does have a soft spot for her.” Solas answered as he approached. 

The elven apostate wasn’t wearing his mask; instead the wolf mask hung from his belt. He leaned on the banister next to the two humans, a faint smile on his face. Solas was even more relaxed than Dorian, seeming at home amongst the partygoers. “Debauchery, deceit, assassinations- oh how I enjoy such balls. They are all the same across my adventures in the Fade and this one is no different.” He shook his head, “All that changes are the players.”

Cullen sighed, not understanding how anyone could enjoy this. Then again, Solas and Dorian weren’t exactly normal- one was a Fade wandering apostate and the other literally grew up attending such balls. He opened his mouth to reply when Josephine, Gaspard, and Helia approached and any words he had disappeared.

Helia was dressed in a forest green strapless ball gown. Golden leaves and vines were embroidered into the skirt and matching gold gloves reached up to her elbows. She wore a mask based off the Dalish heraldry , and her hair was loose, curls tumbling down her back. To finish it off, she wore a choker made of green ribbon around her neck that a small emblem of the Inquisition hung from. She was blushing faintly and looking around in amazement while Gaspard rambled on as they walked up the staircase together. 

“Commander Rutherford, I presume? It is a pleasure to meet the leader of the Inquisition’s forces.” The Grand Duke said after the two approached him. Solas had lost his carefree demeanor in an instant, giving the noble an icy glare. “Yes, ser. It is an honor to meet you.” Cullen replied, bowing like Josie had taught him to. His eyes, however, remained on his beloved Inquisitor, whose blush had deepened. She gave him a small smile before Gaspard asked if she was ready to enter the grand ballroom. As the two walked away, Solas leaned over towards Cullen. “The Grand Duke has a tendency to hunt…. Rabbits , Commander.” He hissed quietly, pointing at his ears briefly before following Helia inside. It took Cullen a minute to understand what Solas had meant. Rabbits? Why should he care that Gaspard hunts rabbits? And why point at his ears? That was when it dawned on him- Elves were often called rabbits as an insult. Gaspard hunted elves . 

He restrained himself from rushing into the ballroom and whisking Helia away from this place. They had to stop the assassination on the Empress! They could deal with Gaspard later. Plus, stabbing the Grand Duke would likely start a war led by his supporters against the Inquisition. Cullen sighed and entered the ballroom. 

Next thing he knew he was swarmed with admirers. He was uncomfortable under their hungry gazes, their attempts to flirt with him failing horribly. He’d rejected countless invitations to dance, and his migraine was a much more sympathetic companion at this point. He could see Leliana from where he stood, grinning as she watched the nobles around him. Of course she’d enjoy this.

“Having fun with your admirers?” He jumped and turned to see Helia standing next to him, eyeing the crowd around them. “Not really. Your attention-” He cleared his throat and lowered his voice- “Yours is the only attention worth anything.” He smirked as she blushed in response. Andraste preserve him, she was so beautiful and cute.

“Save me a dance?”

“No, thank you.”

“Oh. Okay.” 

Cullen quickly realized it was Helia who had asked him. She seemed disappointed in his response and had already started to turn away. He grabbed her hand and she looked at him. “I mean- Ugh I’ve started to just reply to that question on autopilot. Templars aren’t taught how to dance, so I’m probably not the best partner.” He said, but still giving her a reassuring smile. She immediately cheered up and nodded, smiling as she walked away. He dreamily smiled after her, wishing it could just be them in this ballroom.

A hand touched his butt, and he was sadly dragged back into reality. 

“Did… Did you touch my bottom?!”

Cullen didn’t get to speak with Helia alone until after Duchess Florianne’s plot was revealed. Helia had not only gotten Celene and Briala to reconcile but had also managed to get the trio to work together, with Celene as diplomat, Gaspard as military commander, and Briala as the empire’s spymaster. It very much mirrored the Inquisition’s own leadership, and Cullen wondering if she based the solution off it. Spotting Morrigan reentering the ballroom from a balcony, he decided to check there. Finding Helia alone out on the balcony, he approached her and placed a hand on her shoulder. “Are you alright, love?” 

She smiled and looked up at him before replying, “Just tired. It’s been a long night, and it’s not even over yet. Everyone here suddenly wants to speak with the elf who saved the Empire despite a mere hour ago thinking Gaspard brought me as a joke.” He nodded, the two standing in silence before he heard the music start back up. “I may never get another chance like this, so I must ask… May I have this dance, my lady?” Cullen asked, bowing slightly and offering his hand. Helia was surprised for a moment before grinning and taking his hand. “I thought Templars don’t dance?”

“For you, I’ll try.”

Unknown to the pair dancing out on the balcony, two people watched them from the shadows. One, a grand duke who saw the Inquisition as his way to true and complete power over Orlais. The other, a jealous elven mage who wished to keep the Inquisitor for himself.

Later, when Josephine revealed she had letters asking about him at the war table, Heia had asked to take them. Maker help him; he was going to have to keep her from getting stabby on his behalf.

Chapter Text

Helia had left not long after they arrived back at Skyhold, heading off to Crestwood to meet Hawke’s ally. She promised to return as soon as possible, but with reports of Crestwood’s dead walking out of the lake, she couldn’t be sure. 

This meant Cullen hadn’t gotten much sleep. When Helia wasn’t in Skyhold, he worried about her. He knew she could handle herself- he saw first hand when they were defending Haven- but he couldn’t help himself. It didn’t help when his nightmares started to involve her. In one, she was at Kinloch Hold, killed by a blood mage to summon a demon. In another, she was in Kirkwall, having been forced to become Tranquil and he had been forced to wield the brand. The worst was the ones involving Corepheus and Samson- the darkspawn magister tearing her tiny body apart, the Templar gutting her, all while Cullen was helpless to do anything to save her. And now, his newest dreams involved Helia being hunted by Gaspard, his dogs biting and dragging her to the ground as she screamed.

Each time he woke up and was unable to fall back asleep. When this happened, he took to visiting Helia’s quarters. Despite the Inquisitor not being there, he felt like she was with him. Souvenirs of her adventures were sat on shelves or hung from the walls, each with a story behind them. A dragon scale, a Grey Warden’s badge, a smooth stone from the coast.  Often, Cassandra would be looking for him and discover him asleep at Helia’s desk, the Commander having fallen back asleep doing work in his beloved’s quarters. She would leave him there unless it was urgent. He appreciated that. 

Cullen currently sat reading a report regarding lyrium smugglers discovered in the Emerald Graves. He was so close to discovering Samson’s lyrium source which hopefully would lead straight to him. At the very least, it could point them to the Red Templars’ lyrium source. The only information they had was that it was located somewhere in the Dales. Red lyrium deposits could be found all over Thedas, so what made this area so special that Corypheus would order the stuff to be mined there? Why would Samson personally meet with these smugglers?

Cullen still didn’t know what to think of Samson. The other Templar had seen the destructive power of red lyrium in Kirkwall and yet now willing infected his fellow knights with it. The man Cullen had once known, the man who was kicked out of the Templars for helping a mage send letters to his lover, was gone. All he could assume is that Samson’s addiction had corrupted him and destroyed any good in him. He was now a man who would likely do anything to destroy the Inquisition. No, a man who would do anything to destroy them. A man he could have become if he had taken a different path. Cullen didn’t hate Samson simply because of what he had done; he hated him because he was evidence of what Cullen could have become.

Corypheus was no longer a man, but was equally or even more willing to do anything to destroy everything they’ve worked hard to achieve. The magister already despised Helia and would likely relish any opportunity to make her suffer at this point. According to her, he had been about to end her life quickly back in Haven. Apparently after realizing the Anchor was unremovable, he decided to get rid of any competition and had been moments from striking her down when she triggered the avalanche. Now, after foiling his plans yet again, chances were that he would make her suffer if given the chance. 

Yet another reason Cullen wished he could be with her. He wanted to fight alongside her, to protect her from harm. But the best way to help her was by commanding the troops. He was grateful for their allies who did travel alongside her for doing what he so desperately wished and keeping her safe on the battlefield and on her adventures. Varric and Dorian often gave him the details Helia often neglected to tell him. Like the time they fought a dragon in the Hinterlands and she had been inches from being eaten because she had been sidetracked by one of its young. When they had returned she had been bandaged up and bruised, but was grinning from atop Bull’s shoulders.

“Cullen! We fought a dragon! And won! It was awesome!!!”

Hearing that had nearly given him a heart attack. Sometimes he wondered if there was an ongoing bet to see who can give him a heart attack first. If there was, currently the Inquisitor was winning. Sera was a close second. He still had to get back at her for her last prank.

Varric said anything he didn’t tell him would be in the book he was going to write when this was all over. Cullen had a feeling that the book version would be even worse than what truly happened. After all, Varric was a storyteller, and he had a habit of exaggerating the truth. Something that Cullen was familiar with after learning what he had told Cassandra in Kirkwall.

Chapter Text

Solas had been surprised when Cullen had come to him and asked to talk with him. He had been about to refuse when the man looked at him and said, “It’s about Gaspard.” Immediately, the mage’s demeanor shifted from mild frustration to complete seriousness. He explained all that he knew to Cullen on the grand duke’s ‘hobby’. “The chevaliers unofficial graduation ceremony is to take their new blade and test it on city elves. Gaspard, however, takes it a step further. He and several friends of his go on hunting trips. These trips often correspond with when Dalish clans are passing through the Dales or,” Solas scowled, “they release city elves abducted from their homes. They make sure the bodies are never found and as many city guards often ignore crimes in the alienages, there’s no record of missing elves. It does not help that they take from multiple places to avoid raising suspicion.”

“That makes no sense! How is it no one has noticed this?” Cullen asked, already knowing the answer. Solas turned his head to look at an unfinished mural and sighed. “Elves have. But most chevaliers turn a blind eye to it or take part in the hunt. Some shemlen assume they ran away or it was slavers if they’re close to the border. And the Dalish don’t have anyone to tell about the murder. If anything some clans think it is a nearby village and retaliate, resulting in more hostility towards elves.” He shook his head and sighed. “While I dislike the Dalish, they do not deserve this, and city elves have done nothing to incite such violence.” Cullen nodded in agreement. Violence against elves wasn’t new, but normally people kept to themselves regarding the Dalish. “We need to move fast, Commander. Especially now that Gaspard has his eyes on Helia.”

Cullen stood up and headed to the stairs. “I’ll have Leliana look for any indications of evidence or possibly the next hunt. This has to stop.” He winced as yet another migraine began to form, stumbling and causing Solas to get up from his chair in alarm. He waved off the mage, claiming he simply tripped over himself. He seemed skeptical but allowed Cullen to leave without further questioning.

The urges were getting worse. They tempted him by telling him he could do more for the Inquisition, for her, if he just took lyrium. Not even a lot, just a sip… no! Cullen shook his head in an attempt to clear his mind. He’d have to talk to Cassandra soon. He couldn’t do this. So much was riding on him! 

Taking a deep breath, he returned to climbing the stairs to Leliana’s rookery. He had to at least ask the Spymaster to search for more information on Gaspard and then, he was stepping down.

“I already said no! That is my decision.” Cassandra stated, glaring at Cullen. He paced in the armory, the Seeker standing in front of the furnace with her arms crossed. He had come here to tell her to pick a replacement, and she refused! Why couldn’t she see he was a liability?!

“You asked my opinion, and I gave it. You are still fit as Commander.” She said firmly. “Cassandra why won’t you-” He was cut off at the sound of a door opening. The two turned to see Helia in the doorway, newly returned from her adventure in the Emerald Graves. Her face was flushed as though she had ran all the way here. Cullen looked away in shame before mumbling an apology and pushing past her. He couldn’t face her. Not now. She had been so proud of him with his choice and here he was, considering giving up. He didn’t deserve her. Despite everything he’d been through and done, she still stood by him. If she knew what he saw, what he experienced, would she still think the same?

He found himself standing before his lyrium box, the contents seeming mocking him. Frustration welled up inside him before he grabbed it and threw it against the wall, letting out a cry of anger. It smashed into pieces against the wall just as the door next to it opened. Helia had to jump back to avoid getting hit.

Cullen’s face fell upon realizing he’d nearly hit her. “Maker’s breath! I didn’t… I… I’m sorry.” He whispered, looking away from her. He could have hurt her! If he could he’d run and jump off Skyhold right now, but knowing the Inquisitor she’d catch him before he made it. He could hear her footsteps as she approached him and gently took his hand. “Are… are you alright, ma vhenan ?” She asked softly. Her blue eyes met his amber eyes and he immediately knew that at the very least she was owed the whole story. 

“When I was part of the Fereldan Circle, blood mages attacked and took control. The Templars- my friends - were slaughtered. I was… I was tortured for days until Alistar and the Hero of Fereldan defeated the blood mages. I wasn’t the same after that. How could anyone be the same? I still can’t understand why I survived instead of one of the other Templars! But I still wanted to serve.” Cullen pulled away and walked over to the window, leaning against the wall. “So they sent me to Kirkwall. I trusted my commanding officer, and for what? She turned out insane! She used my anger for her advantage. And then, Kirkwall's Circle fell. Innocent people died in the streets. Can't you see why I want nothing to do with that life?"

Helia took a step towards him, hand reaching out for him. “I do. I can’t say I know how it feels, but I understand-”

He shook his head and began to pace. “You shouldn’t forgive me. For a long time I wanted all mages Tranquil or dead. I supported Meridith despite obvious signs she was going insane.” His head began to throb and he held it as his pace sped up. “I refuse to give less to the Inquisition than I gave the Chantry! I should be taking it! I… I should be taking it.”

Helia jumped as his fist met the bookcase. He scared her. He wouldn’t blame her if she ran. But as she always did, she surprised him by staying. Feeling a hand on his arm, he looked up. “This doesn’t have to be about the Inquisition. What do you want, Cullen? Do you want that?” She asked softly. Shaking his head, he sighed. “No. I don’t. But these memories that haunt me… if they become worse, I may not be able to endure this-”

“You can.” She cut him off, cupping his cheek with her hand. “I know you can. You are much stronger than you think. If you can’t believe in that, then believe in me. I know you can do this.” She wiped a tear away he didn’t realize escaped his eye. He gave her a weak smile and nodded. “Alright.” Helia gave him a kiss on the forehead before leaving, saying she would have Rylen take over overseeing training for the rest of the day and for him to relax.

It wasn’t until the next day that they spoke again. Cullen stood on the battlements looking out at the mountains, feeling much more relaxed than he had in a very long time. Helia had come to check on him, happy to see he was feeling better. “You’re the first person I’ve ever told what truly happened to me at the Fereldan Circle. I wasn’t myself for a very long time afterwards. My anger blinded me. I… I’m not proud of the man I used to be. The way I used to view mages, I likely would not have cared for you.” He took her hand and gently squeezed it. “The thought… it sickens me.” 

The two stood in silence for a bit before the mage responded. “I like the way you are now. That hasn’t changed.” He looked at her in surprise as she continued. “I don’t care about how you used to be. The man I care about, the man I love, is the man you are now.” She smiled and leaned her head against his chest. “Nothing will ever change that.” Cullen smiled back at her and kissed the top of her head. “...thank you, my love.”

Chapter Text

Alistair had arrived in Skyhold after learning of the possibility the Wardens were being used by Corypheus. Normally Cullen would have objected, but having a former Warden was useful. Plus he needed to talk with him.

“So, you and the Inquisitor~” Alistair teased, leaning back on a bar stool. The two sat in the tavern at the bar to talk and relax after several hours of discussion on what the next move should be. Helia had left to go investigate the Emprise de Lion after rumors of supposed Red Templars were in the region. He wished she could stay longer, but at the same time the concept of getting another step closer to Samson was exciting. She promised to be back soon and they had been sharing a kiss when Alistair had entered his office. Maker, he would never live that down. It was bad enough after Hawke found out they were dating.

“What?! Cullen?! A girlfriend?! Is the world ending?!”

“Hawke I swear to all that is good and holy-”

“I should tell her how much of a dork you are. Do you still trip over yourself with girls? Tell me! Or not. Varric will tell me.”

“I am going to kill you, Hawke. Don’t push me.”

Yup, Hawke hadn’t changed. Still enjoyed busting his balls. 

“What about us? We are in a relationship.” Cullen smiled as he spoke. He never thought he’d have this. Love was something he was certain he’d never encounter considering his luck. He was convinced his luck had run out after he survived Haven. And yet, here he was in a relationship with a woman who not only saw him at his worst but still loved him. Alistair rolled his eyes at his response. “How is it that you are even able to speak with her. Back at the Circle you could barely talk to girls! Especially elven mage girls.”

“Like you should talk. According to Leliana you had a tendency to do the same around Suranna.” Cullen replied. Neither man used the Hero of Fereldan’s first name in discussion despite knowing it. Despite it being ten years since her passing, Cullen knew that the pain of losing her was still fresh for Alistair. The two had been inseparable, and the former Warden was still haunted by her death. “I did, didn’t I?” He gave a sad smile. “But! We have a chance to make sure you two have a different fate! That’s something I know she’d want. Heck, she’d be proud to know you’re friends with a mage. I sure know I am.” Alistair looked at him hopefully. Cullen smiled at his old friend. “We will make sure of that. But before that, I need to ask for your help.”

He explained the dilemma with Gaspard. Leliana had returned with information on the next hunt- it was in the Emerald Graves, at an abandoned mansion deep in the forest three months from now. Alistair immediately agreed to help him, asking what the plan was. “We need to find a way to get in there and rescue the elves, or somehow reveal the hunt to the rest of Orlais. Problem is, many involved are chevaliers, so straight out accusing Gaspard of such acts would not only cause Celene to arrest him, but the entire treaty would collapse and start up another civil war.”

“So we rescue several elves and have them testify which chevaliers participated. Or defeat the chevaliers there in battle. The question right now is how do we get in?”

“Without the Inquisitor knowing.” Like hell Cullen was taking Helia with them. Gaspard already had his eyes on her, and he wanted to keep him as far away as possible from her. 

“And how do you plan on doing that? Just walking up and telling her she can’t come?” Alistair asked sarcastically.

Cullen sighed. If only it was that easy…

Chapter Text

As soon as Helia returned, she had headed to Cullen’s office. She had managed to not only gathered more information on Samson’s whereabouts, but also had learned that her beloved’s birthday was coming up (Josephine had told her after Helia overheard her discussions with Cullen’s messenger shortly before her departure). She wasn’t sure what exactly one did for a birthday. The Dalish never celebrated such a thing- likely something due to their ancestors’ immortality making age something unnecessary to record- and was unsure what to do. Dorian explained that usually one gets a gift, and after begging Solas for help, she finally finished one a day or so before they returned. On the road back to Skyhold, she came across an additional gift for him. 

Knocking on Cullen’s door, she heard a “come in” and opened the door with a grin. Cullen was looking down at several papers on his desk and had yet to notice her. “Ma vhenan, I missed you.” She greeted, giggling as his head flew up to see her. “Helia! You’re back!” Closing the door she met him in the middle of the room, a hand still hidden behind her back. “Josie told me your birthday was approaching. The Dalish don’t celebrate those and she said you probably didn’t but I still wanted to get you something.” He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “It's fine. Damn, I told her I don’t want attention on me. I barely talked her out of throwing a party. Still, I should have told you.” He replied. “No, it’s okay! I was going to get you a gift anyways-”

A tiny bark came from behind her. Cullen looked at her quizzically as she pulled a basket of four Mabari puppies from behind her back. “I came across these babies on my way back. Their mother had been killed by a bear, and I wasn’t about to let it hurt them and I couldn’t leave them-” Helia was cut off by the hug she received and stood dumbfounded as her boyfriend, the Commander of Inquisition forces, started to babytalk puppies. “ You’re so cute! Yes you are! No chewing on your brother’s tail, you adorable ball of fluff!” 

It was honestly one of the cutest things she had ever seen. Cullen was on the floor covered in puppies licking him now. She started to laugh at the sight, kneeling down next to him and lifting a puppy off his face. “I take it you like dogs?” She teased, placing the squirming animal on her lap while its siblings began to take interest in her. He smiled and sat up after being freed from his furry capturers. “Yes. Growing up we never had the chance to own one and after joining the Templars I thought I never would.” His smile grew as he realized that he not only had a Mabari, but four . “This is one of the best things to ever happen to me! Other than meeting you of course.” 

She leaned in and kissed his cheek. “I have another gift for you.” Pulling a box from her pocket, she handed it to him. Cullen looked at the wooden box in curiosity before opening it to find a small pendant in the shape of a halla. It was carved from Paragon’s Luster and was attached to a leather string, the pendant giving off a faint glow. “I had to beg Solas for the right kind of enchantment. It’s so you always find your way to your destination safely. That way when we go into battle you find your way home to Skyhold safely. It’s alright if you don’t like it-” She was cut off by a kiss from her beloved, an arm wrapped around her waist pulling her close to him.

 “It’s perfect. Just like you.” He whispered, their foreheads leaning against each other. “I’m not perfect.” She quietly replied as he shook his head. “You are to me.”

Chapter Text

Cullen rarely left Skyhold. So when business in Fereldan required him to deal with in person, he jumped at the opportunity. He realized how close he would be to his old home and decided to see if Helia was able to come with him. There was a place he wanted to show her. The hard part was finding her.

Seeing as Helia had no real office, she had taken to doing her work wherever she wanted. Normally this meant she was either with one of her companions or in her room. Or she was in the stables. She once explained that the mounts were less judging of her and how she portrayed herself than the people of Skyhold. Master Dennet also tended to not judge her or see her as this untouchable figure- for him, all that mattered was she was good to her mounts. 

Cullen sighed, thinking of her collection of strange creatures in the stables. There were the normal horses, yes, but she had an assortment of other mounts. The dracolisks had a tendency to try and bite anyone but her and Cole. The Hunter Shade, named Theneras , had a tendency to appear shy but can get very nasty with people it didn’t like. Meaning everyone but Helia, Cole, and Dennet.  Cullen made sure to walk on the other side of the stables when passing its stall.

She had a soft spot for the harts. She once mentioned they were similar to the halla, and always carried treats for them in her pockets. Her favorite hart, a Royal Sixteen named Hellathen, had been a gift sent by her clan after they received word she was alright. It always seemed to understand people, and would respond in earnest if they seemed upset or happy. Hellathen seemed to like Cullen and had a tendency to nudge him when he pet it.

The nuggalopes were… well, weird. Nugs were already weird. Sir Snugglebutt, the Avvar war nug, was peacefully asleep in his stall. Cullen hurried past, not in the mood for the creature to lick his head. Maker why are its feet so human like?!

The Bog Unicorn, lovingly dubbed Oogie, was enjoying a brush from Helia, eyes closed while she hummed. One of the Mabari puppies, a male named Chester, was asleep in a pile of hay nearby. Chester and Oogie were inseparable and it wasn’t unusual to find the dog in the horse’s stall with it. Cullen smiled and leaned against the stall door, listening to her. She noticed him after a few moments and gave him a smile, giving Oogie a kiss on the nose before walking over. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly. He hugged her back, kissing the top of her head. Moments like this were rare and he wanted nothing more than to treasure it. A few moments passed before she looked up at him, resting her chin on his chest.

“Well this is a pleasant surprise. You almost never leave your office.” He chuckled at her statement. It wasn’t a lie. Helia often had to bring him food on some days when he was overwhelmed by reports and hadn’t left his tower at all. And that’s only when she’s in Skyhold. Other days it was Cassandra, Varric, or Cole depending on who’s there. But it always tasted better when she brought it herself. She would refuse to leave until he took a break and ate, often rambling on about something she encountered on her travels (“Cullen it was a literal ocean of lyrium! And the veins of lyrium reminded me of the veins of a person but at the same time they were like trees! And it was so blue! I’ve only seen it red!”) or about her friends’ discussions (“You know Iron Bull wants a weapon made of dawnstone? Blackwall said it was brittle but Bull says it's pretty so who cares!”). Helia’s mere presence let him relax instantly, but her voice was louder than the whispers begging him for lyrium and made him laugh or gasp in shock. 

“It is. I was hoping to speak with you.” 

“Aren’t we speaking right now?”

“Haha very funny.” She let out a laugh. He smiled and continued, “I have business in Fereldan and I was hoping you could come with me. There’s a place I was hoping to show you.” Cullen couldn’t keep from grinning as her eyes grew wide and she nodded. “Yes! I would love to come! When are we leaving? Where are we going? Is it to see Alistar? He promised to tell me more stories about you when you were a trainee. Or is it to see your siblings? Tell me tell me-”

Cullen laughed. Her excitement was yet another reason he loved her. Helia asked a lot of questions, but her curiosity was similar to his own as a child. She saw new things and places with excitement and awe. Despite all she had seen, she somehow managed to keep some sort of innocence that normally is destroyed by war and corruption. Honestly he was a bit jealous.

“We leave in a day. It’s a surprise, and we won’t be seeing the king. But he did say he will join us at Adamant if you will have him.” Cullen explained. She nodded in understanding. “Alright. Is it safe for him? I know he was a Warden, but should he be leaving his people for long periods?”

“Trust me, Alistair does not want to be king. He only did so because he felt he had to. If he had it his way he’d be in Skyhold helping us all the time.” 

“Oh. More rulers should be like him. He actually relates to people.” Helia stated. Cullen nodded in agreement, finally releasing her. She smiled and headed off, likely to get ready for their trip. He smiled, and in his bliss didn’t hear Blackwall come up behind him.

“Taking ‘er on a trip?”

“Ahh! Blackwall! Yes, I am.” Cullen replied, a bit surprised by the Warden’s sudden appearance. The older man nodded in approval, a rare smile on his face. Normally only Helia or Sera could get a smile out of him. Meaning either he was about to kill him or was pleased with him. As though he could read Cullen’s thoughts, Blackwall chuckled. “Relax. I’m not going to kill you. I’m just happy you’re treating ‘er right.” He patted the commander on the shoulder before leaving. He hadn't threatened to kill him yet, so maybe he had warmed up to the idea of Helia and Cullen being together-

“You better keep doing so or I’ll feed you to the first darkspawn I see.”

And there it is.

Riding through the forests of Fereldan was always relaxing. The quiet peace that existed there always put him at easy. Being able to do so with Helia only made it better. They were heading to Frostback Basin to meet with a professor wishing for aid in his research regarding the last Inquisitor’s resting place and the possibility of setting up a camp there before sending Scout Harding to set up and fortify a possible campsite. Normally, Cullen would have sent a letter in return but the search intrigued him. Very little was known about Inquisitor Ameridan. Helia had noted his name sounding Elven in origin, but for all she knew humans could have also been using the name. 

She seemed slightly on edge. The mention of Ameridan reminded her of her role as the Inquisitor, of her duty to save Thedas. She did her best to keep her fears and anxieties to herself, instead acting like she was unbothered by how people would kneel before her or place her on a pedestal. But Cullen knew she was terrified of failing and of not living up to everyone’s expectations.

“I can’t do this. Everyone expects me to fix everything but I barely know how I even survived the Conclave! If we fail… if I fail… the whole world will suffer and it will be my fault!”

He remembered the day she said that to him. She was having an anxiety attack after several people in Skyhold came to her to thank her for sealing the Breach and why other rifts hadn’t closed on their own. After mapping out where these rifts were and seeing the vast number of them, and then learning that villages had been destroyed by rifts before she even realized they existed, she broke down. Cullen had spent the day with her and Dorian, who had come to try and calm his friend down. The two men ended up spending the night in her quarters, Dorian asleep on the sofa while Helia and Cullen cuddled in her bed. 

It was unfair to place so much on her shoulders. Hopefully learning about her predecessor would give her a chance to see she wasn’t the first Inquisitor to feel like that and that she wasn’t alone. 

Cullen turned to talk to her when something flew past his head and embedded itself into a tree. The two immediately got off their mounts and dove for cover as more arrows flew past. A flash of red and a sword racing towards them gave him a chance to identify their attackers- Red Templars. “Dammit… An ambush…” He muttered, blocking a sword swing with his shield. A warm, protective feeling surrounded him as a barrier surrounded him courtesy of Helia. She was busy dealing with the archer, lightning flying out of her staff in long tendrils. Cullen cut the Templar down and moved on to the next one. 

They quickly finished them off. While searching them for orders, Helia discovered a note with instructions to find and capture Cullen as he was to be traveling alone. Seeing as it came directly from Samson, this meant that he wanted him alive personally. “But how did they know we were in the area?” Helia asked, worriedly looking at him. “I don’t know, Helia. I really don’t know.” This meant they had a spy in their ranks who knew he was supposed to be traveling through here, but as the note made no mention of the Inquisitor chances are they were taken by surprise by her presence. “Good thing I was here then. Not that you couldn’t take them all down, but those archers are dangerous. And annoying.” Helia mumbled the last part. 

Cullen nodded in agreement. “It was. Let’s keep moving in case there are more in the area. Plus, we are close to where I wanted to show you.” The air of seriousness and worry surrounding her almost completely disappeared as she grinned and called for Hellathen. 

It wasn’t much longer before they arrived at a lake close to Frostback Basin. The remains of a village lay close by, a place Cullen did not yet want to approach. Maybe someday, but not today. Helia looked out at the lake before turning to him, “Where are we?”

“You walk into danger every day. I wanted to take you far away from that, even for just a moment.” Cullen let out a sigh. That hadn’t worked very well seeing as danger seemed to follow him everywhere. 

“The village I grew up in was nearby. I used to come here as a child to escape my siblings. I love them, but they could be too much at times. This place… this place was always quiet.” He turned to look out at the lake, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. Memories of his childhood ran through his mind- swimming with his siblings, fishing trips with his father and brothers, him sitting and relaxing on the dock. 

“You’re alone with a mage. That… that doesn’t concern you?” Helia whispered, taking one of his hands. Shaking his head, he explained that while Templars had rules on relationships with mages, he no longer was bound by such rules. Still, she seemed to worry about him. “I know, but… you’ve seen the worst mages can offer. How… how don’t you see it in me? Especially after earlier- you saw me using magic for the first time in battle.” Helia seemed almost ashamed as though she had done something wrong. He sighed, pulling her close to him and resting his chin on her head. 

“I don’t. If I’ve given you any reason to doubt that…” Cullen sighed before continuing. “Of course I have. But whatever I fear in magic, I don’t see in you. Whenever I look at you, I see the woman I love. That will never, ever change.” 

They stood in silence for several minutes, simply taking in the sounds of the lake and enjoying the moment of peace. It wasn’t until he remembered why he brought her here did Cullen speak again. “The last time I was here was the day before I left for training. My brother gave me this coin for good luck.” Helia watched as he pulled out a small coin from his pocket, tilting her head slightly in curiosity. “Templars were not allowed to have such things. Our faith should carry us through everything, yet I never got rid of it.” Taking her hand, he placed the coin in her palm before covering it with his own hand. “Humor me. We don’t know what you’ll face before this is finally over. This can’t hurt. Plus, I’m quite sure this will continue to bring me luck.” He pulled out the pendant she gave him from under his shirt with his free hand. Helia smiled and nodded, her hand wrapping around the coin. “I’ll keep it safe. I promise.”

“Good.. it’s silly but… I’m glad.” There, on a dock by an abandoned village, a couple shared a kiss and a promise to return when this all was over.

Chapter Text

Everything was set. The attack on Adamant would take place in a few hours; Inquisition forces waiting until nightfall at an oasis by the fortress. As much as they wanted to charge in, the heat of the desert forced them to wait until nightfall when it would be much cooler. This left Cullen several hours to confirm the battle plans and run any last minute changes over with his troops. With two hours left, he had finally finished and was resting. They would need all their strength for the attack. A familiar face plopped down next to his spot sitting on the edge of the oasis.

“So, Varric tells me you and the Inquisitor are a thing.” Hawke said after several minutes of uncomfortable silence. The two had never really gotten along in Kirkwall. Carver, Hawke’s brother, got along better with him but only slightly, mainly because he had remained in the city to help with the rescue efforts before heading out after his brother. “Yes, we are together.” He did his best to ignore the exaggerated gasp coming from the mage next to him. “What? Knight Captain Cullen has a girlfriend?! It must truly be the end of the world!” 

“Hawke I swear to all that is holy-”

“I never saw this coming. And with a mage! Considering what happened in Kirkwall I wouldn’t have blamed you for avoiding them altogether.” The Champion seemed apologetic. “Yes well, Helia is different. I… I see her magic differently.” Cullen replied softly, “Her magic is almost soothing to me. Normally, seeing magic in use puts me on guard, but with her… I can relax.” Hawke nodded and looked out towards the fortress. The two fell into silence again before Cullen finally asked about Anders. “I know that cat loving mage is still alive. Is he well?” 

Hawke whipped around to look at him in shock. “Of all the people- Why would I know-”

“You wouldn’t leave him in his state. While I greatly disapprove of his actions, he was still your friend. Same with Fenris.” 

The mage was silent, staring the commander down. Cullen honestly thought he wasn’t going to reply when Hawke whispered “They’re fine. I sent them and Carver to the south while all this Red Templar shit goes down. Thank you for asking.”

The Wardens were not giving up without a fight. Helia struck yet another demon down and dodged an attack by a mage. While the warriors had stopped fighting them, there was no hope of reasoning with the mages. They were completely under Corypheus’ control and had even resorted to attacking their own allies. Blackwall blocked an attack from behind her while Solas and Varric cleared the way forward. Stroud, Hawke’s contact, struck down the demon that Blackwall had stopped. 

Helia let out a small prayer to the Maker that they would get to Clarel in time. She was starting to believe in this shem god alongside her own and figured that if she was supposedly Andraste’s chosen that maybe, just maybe, the Maker was at least open to listening to her. Igniting a foe on fire she rushed forward to the courtyard, finally finding Clarel mere moments from summoning a demon. An unopened rift sat in the center of the courtyard. Wardens turned to face the group while Erimond did his best to claim she was the enemy. “What? Saving the world? Stopping the Blight? That’s all I wish to help with! If it requires blood magic, so be it!”

“And makes Warden mages slaves of Corypheus?!” Alistair shot back. Whispers erupted from the crowd. Not only was the King of Fereldan- a former Warden himself- here, but he claims they were being controlled by Corypheus?! 

“Wardens! I have no qualms with you! I have spared as many of you as I could! Please, stand down as our fight is not with you!” Helia pleaded. Several Wardens looked at one another before nodding. Clarel was still silent, staring at Erimond. When she finally spoke, it was almost a whisper. “You… You lied to us? You used us to serve the Blight?!” The magister was backing away, trying to calm the enraged woman down. “N-Now Clarel-” He was cut off as she struck him with her staff, sending him tumbling down the stairs. In moments he was swarmed by Wardens and restrained. Clarel, however, decided her life was forfeited the moment she decided to even consider her insane plan and that she did not have the right to live while she had sentenced so many to their deaths, and had used her magic to incinerate herself.  

Helia and Solas were unable to reach her in time to extinguish the flames. Solas seemed disappointed in the act. “I had hoped she would at least stand trial for her actions.” He quietly said, looking at the Inquisitor. Helia shook her head. “She couldn’t live with the guilt after realizing everything she had done, all the blood spilled, had been to aid the very thing she sought to destroy. I would have done the same in her position.” She turned away to face a courtyard filled with men and women looking to her for what they should do. Stroud was the most senior in their ranks and had already agreed to go to Weisshaupt and relay what had occurred, but the question lay with what the Warden should do next. Looking at Alistair and Hawke, the duo shrugged, leaving the decision up to her. “... You stay and aid the Inquisition in its fight against Corypheus. I cannot in good conscious exile the very group needed to defeat the Blight, and should it return to Orlais or Fereldan we will need you.”

Solas sighed and shook his head, while Blackwall and Varric grinned and cheered. Alistair appeared to be overjoyed by her decision, while Hawke… Hawke appeared conflicted. Helia herself was certain of  her decision- while the Grey Wardens were complicit in their actions regarding blood magic, they were being tricked and lied to that what they were doing was for the good of the world. She also did not think she could judge them. Only a Grey Warden could judge them.

Seeing a familiar face rushing towards her, she smiled. Cullen was likely sending word that they had dealt with any remaining demons or possessed Wardens. She couldn’t wait to see him safe and sound. Her blood went cold however upon seeing Jim’s face. It was one of pure fear.

“Inquisitor! The Commander! H-He’s collapsed!! A mage attacked him b-but there’s no wound!”

A laugh from behind her nearly stopped her heart. Erimond was almost cackling from where he knelt on the ground. “You really think we didn’t see this possibility?! Lord Corypheus had a failsafe just in case you decided to show up!” 

Helia whipped around and stalked towards him. Erimond’s laugh trailed off as he was faced with the pure fury of the Dalish mage. She grabbed his collar and yanked him to his feet, her face inches from his. “ What did you do?!” She hissed, and in that moment the Tevintar mage felt a fear he had never felt before. “I d-did nothing but connect that rift to my master’s ally! Your precious commander is likely the Nightmare Demon’s now!”

He was thrown to the ground, a loud crack and cry of pain indicating he had broken something. Helia ignored it, facing the rift and looking to the mark. Solas approached her, a hand on her shoulder. He had a feeling what she was about to do and feared for her safety. “The Nightmare Demon is a demon that feeds off fear. If possible, I shall accompany you-”

“Solas, I know you would love to walk physically in the Fade. But… you’re the only person I trust to take care of Cullen right now. You have experience in dreaming in the Fade. If he’s trapped there via a nightmare… If I can’t be at his side until we save him, I’ll be comforted that you can.” She looked at him with tears in her eyes. Solas realized that she was terrified and that if she could, she’d stay behind and send him. But as she is the only person known to survive the Fade physically, she had to go. Closing his eyes, he took her hands. “I will do all I can to keep spirits from his body. Return safely, Helia.”

She simply nodded, gesturing to Cassandra to join her. Alistair tried to join in but was turned down- “If something were to happen to you, all of Fereldan would have my head. So would Cullen. I need you to stay with him too”- while Hawke and Stroud made it clear they were coming regardless. Lifting her hand to the rift, she felt the Anchor come to life and a surge of energy surge out of it. As the rift opened, Helia looked over her shoulder to Solas and Alistair before facing the rift and taking a step inside.

It was so cold.

Cullen huddled in a magical cell back in Kinloch Hold, demons lurking right outside of it. He refused to check if they had left, however. If he kept his eyes shut, then this wasn’t happening. This wasn’t real. It couldn’t be real! He was in Adamant, he probably got hit on the head or something, and when he opens his eyes Helia will be next to him making sure he was alright-

“Oh, Commander Rutherford. It is always a pleasure to see you. Normally I’m too far away to have a hand in your nightmares, but they still feed me. This time however, I can personally tailor them.”

This wasn’t real. He forced his eyes open to see a creature appear before him that looked so similar to a Fear Demon, yet he knew it wasn’t who was speaking to him. Simply an aspect. How he knew, Cullen couldn’t tell you. It leaned down to stare him down, grinning and licking its lips. Blood mages stood at its sides, salivating at the possibility to make a Templar their victim. A face he wished to forget stepped forward, grinning with teeth that resembled a bear’s. Cullen felt his breathing quicken, could hear the blood roaring in his ears. He couldn’t move. No. Not him. Please no. 

Uldred’s grin widened as the commander did his best to shrink back further. “Oh, the one that got away. This shall be fun.”

It felt like days but could have only been a few hours  when the demon returned, the blood mages having left the room for the time being. Cullen’s body ached from the deep, infected cuts littering his body inflicted to obtain his blood. He was so tired, if he could only sleep yet his captors prevented him from doing so. Weakly staring at the Nightmare, he managed a “What” out. It simply chuckled, circling his position on the ground. It hurt too much to move, so he did his best to ignore it. He wouldn’t break. He survived the first time, he would do so again.

“Your beloved Inquisitor has entered the Fade in search of you, only to discover I hold her memories of the Conclave. If it weren’t for them, she would have rushed forward.”

Cullen’s eyes flew open and he looked at the demon. What?! No. This had to be a lie. Helia couldn’t be here. She had to be safe and sound in Adamant-

“You should have heard the threat she spit at me demanding to know where you were. While I despise Love, and Desire is a demon I’d rather ignore, this time I found it endearing. A Dalish mage wanting to save the sad, broken Templar. But that would require giving up one of the people who has kept me well fed for over a decade.”

No. She couldn’t be here. Not to save him. She couldn’t see him like this. He put her in danger. 

“It will be fun to see the hope fade from her eyes as I crush her beneath my feet.” 

“NO!” Cullen leapt to his feet and lunged at the demon. It simply slipped through the barrier and watched as he pounded against the magical wall. Grinning, it turned to leave as the blood mages returned. “I’ll make sure you see it, Commander. Or should I call you Cullen now that we’re so well acquainted?”

“DON’T YOU LAY A FINGER ON HER! GET BACK HERE!”

The Nightmare turned to the apparition of Uldred and nodded. Uldred simply smirked and closed the door behind it, drawing a dagger from his sleeve.

Solas sat next to the sleeping Cullen, gazing up at the opened Rift. Wardens and Inquisition forces were holding off the demons that streamed through it, but it was obvious they wouldn’t last for much longer. Iron Bull had been forced to retreat after a rather nasty attack from a Pride Demon. Dorian was currently at his side, the two whispering to each other. From the looks on their faces, Solas can assume they are comforting each other. A quick peck on the cheek from Dorian confirms his suspicions that they were together. He had been suspecting so ever since he was awoken to moans of pleasure coming from the library above him that certainly sounded like Dorian and later when a horned shadow slipped out of the study.

At least someone was finding love. Solas, however, was stuck watching over the shem lover of the Inquisitor. A woman who he saw as the only good to come out of the Dalish. Why couldn’t he have admitted his feelings to her that time in the Fade? Why did it have to be Cullen, the former Templar who distrusted magic, that captured her heart? What did he have that Solas didn’t?

He stared down at the man. Solas could easily lower his guard and let spirits take the man’s body, but doing so would break Helia’s heart and trust in him. She trusted him to watch over her beloved. Letting out a sigh, Solas strengthened the barrier protecting the commander. Her happiness was worth more than his own. He would win her heart some other way.

Helia ignored the jabs and taunts the Nightmare threw at her. She was focused on saving Cullen. The horrors that he had faced in his past, his nightmares, this thing was likely forcing him to relive them over and over and over again. She couldn’t let him be tortured again. She refused to let him suffer more, especially because of her. If she hadn’t gotten so close to him, maybe he would still be safe. 

Almost like he could read her thoughts, Hawke placed a hand on her shoulder. “Cullen is a lot stronger than you think. But you’re the first good thing to happen to him since I met him. The way he looks at you is something special. We’ll save him.”

Fighting their way to the Nightmare with the aid of Divine Justinia, or at least a spirit that took her appearance, Helia stood outside its lair. She could hear his screams. She was afraid to go in there. What if when this was all over he blamed her for this? A hand on the arm from Varric shook her from her thoughts and led her to open the door.

She wished this was a dream. Cullen was trapped inside a magical prison, curled in a tight ball while Fearlings surrounded him. She saw red as the sound of the demon’s laughter reached her ears, and she let out a roar as she charged forward. Her friends were almost frozen to the spot as she used her staff like a club. Knocking the demon down, she stood above it slamming the top of her staff down on it’s skull over and over again. Cassandra had to rip it from her hands while Blackwall wrapped his arms around her waist and held her back as she let out a sob. Varric was frozen to the spot. Helia had never done something like that. It was like she had been possessed, but if she was Cassandra would have noticed. Hawke looked at him in shock while Stroud dealt with the fearlings. Varric lifted Bianca and moved to aid the Warden. 

Blackwall released her by the cell, standing back to give her space. Helia was trembling as she reached out and dispelled the barrier, falling to her knees in front of Cullen and holding him against her. The commander glowed as his body disappeared, returning to his physical body. Blackwall helped the mage up and hugged her when she clung to him and started to cry. Looking at the rest of the group, he gestured in the direction of the exit. He led her out, shielding her from the prying eyes of their forces as they exited the Fade. She quickly closed the Rift before sprinting off to Cullen’s side.

The Commander was sitting up and hugging his sides, only responding to her voice. Cullen looked up to see her almost falling face first onto the ground in her rush to see him. He let out a sob and clung to her, burying his face in her neck. She rubbed his back and whispered reassurances to him, tears streaming down her face. He had seen her die there at the hands of the blood mages. Watched them force her to become an abomination. And the worst part was he couldn’t stop them. 

To see her safe, to be freed from that living nightmare, he couldn’t hold back his emotions anymore. She kissed his head and promised that he was safe now, that she was so sorry he had been dragged into this, that she wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. Despite struggling to stay awake, his eyelids felt heavy. He didn’t want to sleep, yet his body was exhausted and despite being unconscious moments prior Cullen felt like he hadn’t slept in weeks. The last thing he heard was Helia quietly singing to him in Elven.

He had a dreamless sleep and when he woke up, Helia’s sleeping form was curled up next to him hugging her tightly. He simply pulled her closer to him, the mere fact she was with him dispelling his fears. 

It would take time to get past this, but they would endure.

Chapter Text

After Adamant, Cullen had been unable to sleep at all. He could barely be in the same room as a mage other than Helia without having a panic attack. His nightmares intensified in number and terror. Scars from where he had been injured in the Fade started to show up on his body to the confusion of Skyhold’s surgeon. All his progress getting past Kinloch had seemingly reset, and it hurt.

It hurt not being able to talk and play chess with Dorian. It hurt having to take the long way to the War Room in order to avoid seeing Solas and asking for information on the Dalish to surprise Helia. 

It didn’t help that everyone was walking on eggshells around him. Everyone could be laughing and talking in a room and the moment he entered, they would go silent. Whispers swirled about what had happened to him. No one was certain exactly what he had been through in the Fade, but what was certain was his sudden fear of mages. Even the Templars who had joined the Inquisition were worried about this sudden shift of opinion. 

Cassandra, Varric, and Blackwall refused to speak about how they found him in the Fade. They at least weren’t acting like he was made of glass- that was reserved for Helia. The brutality she had exhibited was concerning to say the least. When Solas had been told about it- the only person Cassandra was willing to speak with about her behavior- he wondered if she had channeled the spirits of her ancestors’ rage in that moment. But that was only a theory.

Helia had been much more withdrawn since their return. She had refused to leave Skyhold for the time being and those outside her inner circle only saw her going to and from her room and Cullen’s. When they had first returned, she tried to stay away from him, stating it was because of her he was even put through that. It took convincing from the Commander that he refused to blame her for what happened and that if anything he needed her now more than ever. 

“Cullen, you need to rest. Please.” Helia had begged him at one point. He refused, stating if he fell asleep, the blood mages would have a chance to get him. It got to the point she had to slip sleeping herbs into his food to get him to fall into a dreamless sleep. When he would finally fall asleep, Helia cried. She cried for the torture he had been through both in the past and recently. She couldn’t simply heal him wounds; these wounds would only heal with time.

It took close to three months before he had recovered enough to tolerate mages again. And only mages he had trusted before. All other mages could potentially set him off into a panic and possibly set his progress back again.  In those three months, they had discovered Samson’s hideout and formulated a plan to attack. Helia was still apprehensive of Cullen going into battle again. 

“Please Cullen, I need to know this isn’t because you want revenge on him. And what if-”

“Helia, you didn’t cause me to get hurt last time. And… I’d feel better coming with you mainly because it’s Samson. I’d sleep better knowing I was with you.” Cullen said, taking her into his arms. She closed her eyes and leaned into him, and he started to worry he had said something wrong. 

“What… what if when you see me use magic, you’ll hate me? The last time I held a staff, I…” A quiet sniff came from her. Cullen pulled her over to his chair and sat her down in it. “I know you’re scared, love. But you weren’t possessed. I will never let that happen to you. And I could never hate you. I don’t see a mage, or the Inquisitor, or the Herald when I look at you.” He lifted her chin so they were looking at each other in the eye. Hers were red and wet with tears, his tired yet full of love. “I see Helia, the woman I fell in love with the moment I first saw her. The woman who refused to let my past define her opinion of me. A woman whose smile lights up any room she enters and whose curiosity has no bounds.” She blushed and nodded, wiping some of her tears away.

He smiled at her. “We can leave as soon as you want, Helia. I won’t rush you.”

“I should be telling you that.”

The two laughed. “We keep going in circles with that don’t we?” She asked, kissing him. Her lips tasted faintly of elfroot and chamomile. “Yes, yes we do.” He replied, touching his forehead against hers. “Let’s leave today. I’ll get Varric, Cassandra, and…. Dorian. If that’s alright!” She looked to him for approval. It was clear she wasn't sure if he was ready to be in constant contact with another mage yet. 

Cullen felt his body tense slightly but nodded. It was Dorian. He wouldn’t hurt him. No mage would. Not with his beloved there by his side. She had promised him not long after they returned to Skyhold that nothing like that would ever happen again.

“I will never, ever let that happen to you ever again. As long as I’m alive and at your side, no mage will harm you ever. If I could, I’d go back in time and kill that monster Uldred myself.”

Helia nodded back before pulling away to go gather her party. He wished she would stay longer with him. He had only recently come to understand what Dorian told him his dark future self meant by his words. Helia truly was a ray of light for him. She led him out of the darkness of lyrium addiction, of thinking all magic was the same, and then- quite literally- out of his nightmares. 

The Shrine of Dumat was eerily quiet as they approached. Cullen felt himself tense up as they approached the shrine, already hearing the song of red lyrium call for him. Helia must have sensed his discomfort as he felt her hand slip into his. Glancing at her, he saw she was giving him a faint smile as she squeezed his hand. The song faded out as he felt his body relax slightly. 

Cassandra helped him to push open the doors inside. A courtyard lay between them and the inner sanctum of the shrine. Several Red Templars spotted them and immediately attacked. While Varric and Dorian kept their distance while attacking, Helia rushed forward. A blade of magic formed as she sliced through one of the monstrous creatures aiming for Cassandra. Ducking as a spear of red lyrium nearly impaled his head, Cullen returned his focus to the battle at hand.

Fighting their way inside, the group found the shrine on fire. Varric commented on the amount of the corrupted mineral inside. A tattered Templar banner hung from the ceiling, once a symbol of pride and now something to be ashamed of. Cullen thought back to when he was a child and the sight of such a banner excited him. Now it simply brought him disappointment and sadness.

Further inside was Samson’s quarters. No sign of the corrupted general but sitting at the foot of his bed was Maddox. Cullen rushed to the Tranquil’s side. The man simply looked at him and nodded his head in greeting.

“Knight Commander Cullen. And Lady Inquisitor. Samson left some time ago.” Maddox’s emotionless greeting caused clear discomfort to both mages in the party. Neither were fans of the Rite of Tranquility, and ever since discovering the possibility of reversing it they had been assisting Cassandra in her research. Still, Cullen knew Helia had met maybe two Tranquils in her entire life. Helsmia would often have conversations with the elf, recording her accounts with the creatures Helia had come across in her travels. The other was an alchemist she met in Redcliff, and while she was polite with him it was clear she wasn’t sure how to act around him. 

“Yes, but Maddox, are you hurt? I’ll call for a healer-'' Cullen was cut off as the man simply shook his head. “It’s too late. I drank my entire supply of blightcap essence before you entered. Samson left after we decided it would be best to torch the shrine. We could not allow anything to fall into your hands.” Helia looked at Cullen in confusion before returning her gaze to the dying man. “Why would you do anything for him?!” She asked. Maddox simply blinked at her before replying Samson saved him and gave him a purpose. It was only fair he did the same. 

The two watched as his eyes slipped closed and he slumped over, the poison finally taking what little life he had left. Cullen moved the body to lay on its back before standing up. Helia remained kneeling, closing Maddox’s eyes and whispering a Dalish prayer before standing up. “He was so loyal to Samson. And what did he mean regarding Samson saving him?” She asked, looking to Cullen and Varric. They were the only two here who knew Samson prior to Corypheus, afterall.

Varric shrugged. “Don’t look at me. Samson seemed to only be out for himself back in Kirkwall.”

“I think I know why.” Cullen said, turning away from Maddox’s body. “We should call for someone to give him a proper burial after we leave. It's the least we can do.”

“And why do you think you know what he was referring to?” Dorian inquired. Cullen was hoping to discuss that later, but now was as good of a time. “I knew Maddox. He was once a mage in Kirkwall’s Circle who Samson helped deliver messages to and from his lover. When they were discovered, Maddox was punished for ‘damaging the integrity of a Templar’ and was made Tranquil. Such a life in Kirkwall isn’t kind, so I assumed he had either perished in the Circle or had passed away eeking out a life on the streets. Samson must have found him and taken him in.”

“So Samson still has a shred of humanity?” Helia asked, her hope almost immediately being crushed as he shook his head. “I doubt it. Samson knew Maddox would be useful. But regardless of how well he treated Maddox, he still willingly infected Templars with red lyrium. Any good he does is greatly negated by the amount of evil he’s committed.” Cullen started to walk away when his foot kicked something. Looking down, he discovered an abundance of empty lyrium bottles. Cassandra picked one up and noted how it was licked clean. The sheer number of bottles meant that Samson’s resistance to lyrium was inhuman. For the normal Templar, that many bottles meant certain death. 

Approaching a desk, Cullen noticed a letter addressed to him. Picking it up, he began to read it over and frowned. “What is it?” Helia asked, on her tiptoes to try and read it over his shoulder. Looking at her, he sighed. “It’s mostly nonsense, but I’ll try to make sense of it.”

Taking a deep breath, he began to read the letter aloud:

Cullen,

How ironic that we both become leaders of opposing forces? Honestly, you may be my enemy but I know you could do more on our side than for that knife eared Inquisitor of yours. 

Drink the red lyrium and its song will reveal the truth. It is not the horrible thing we saw in Kirkwall. Meredith simply was too weak to wield such power. I don’t want to fight you. After all, we were once friends! So I offer you an opportunity to make history: join me. The two of us could help bring forth a new world, one where the Elder One is a benevolent and attentive god. Your “Herald”, after all, is nothing more than a false prophet who stole something rightfully his. 

Oh wait, she’s your partner isn’t she? What happened to the Cullen who just barely tolerated Hawke? The one who simply looked away while Maddox was unjustly punished for simply having a lover? She’s the one trying to steal the Maker’s throne. She’s only using you. We both know it.

Should you choose to take up my offer, I have a feeling you’ll find me.

Samson

Cullen nearly ripped the note to shreds. How dare he even consider the possibility of him joining Corypheus?! Or that Helia was using him?! She loved Cullen for who he was. The mage didn’t have a cruel bone in her body, and refused to allow for captured enemy troops to suffer. Samson truly was insane if he thought insulting her would get on his good side. 

Varric called out from the other room that he’d found something, and they all rushed to meet him. Dorian recognized the strange objects as enchanted smithing equipment, and carefully collected them for Dagda to investigate. As they started to leave, Helia stopped and turned to look back. 

“This place… Corypheus worshipped here once. So many of my people’s blood…” She trailed off, looking to the ground.  They all knew she was likely imagining the rivers of blood that once ran through these halls. Blood that belonged to her people who likely couldn’t even fight back against their killers. Taking her hand, the Commander gently led her out of the shrine. 

As they rode back to Skyhold, he sent a prayer to the Maker that the souls of those sacrificed there would find peace.

Chapter Text

Helia seemed to have a gift in making Cullen a flustered mess. He didn’t understand how she did it, but almost everything she did was either adorable or confusing (or in some cases, shocking), at least while she was in Skyhold. What was clear was how oblivious she was when doing so.

For example, he was catching up on paperwork that had built up while he was recovering from his imprisonment in the Fade. Helia had come in, walked over, and sat in his lap, her back against his chest. Cullen immediately started blushing, stumbling over his words as he tried to ask what she was doing. She simply looked up at him and said “Sitting. It’s cold out and you’re warm.” She proceeded to stay there through all his meetings that day in his office, Rylen the only soldier not fazed by the sight (“Cullen, after Haven nothing the Inquisitor does fazes me.”). After it happened a couple more times, the soldiers were used to walking into the Commander’s office to find the Inquisitor snuggled up in his lap while her lover was trying to stop blushing and get work done. 

Another time was when she asked him what Bull meant when he said that Blackwall must have perfected his grip on his “sword” after years of isolation. Apparently when she asked them to elaborate, Blackwall refused to and Bull told her to ask Cullen. He nearly had a heart attack hearing that come out in such an innocent way. Helia was rather concerned with him after he knocked over his inkwell in reaction to her question. It led to a very, very awkward explanation involving a lot of blushing and no eye contact. Leliana noted their lack of eye contact at the next few war meetings.

When she heard mention of the pile of proposals and love letters Cullen received following their trip to the Winter Palace, she got defensive. “He said he’s not bait!” She snapped at the other two advisors, resulting in an awkward silence. She also requested to see the letters after the meeting, but it was agreed she seemed too calm when she asked that maybe giving her those was a very bad idea. (Cullen later heard one admirer was murdered by Red Jenny. Sera told him that ‘The bitchy noble had it coming, flirting with Heli’s boyfriend. Plus she tormented her servants. She deserved it.’). When another Orlesian noble attempted to flirt with the mage in Skyhold, she was blissfully unaware of the man’s statements and gestures. After a ‘conversation’ with Cullen, the noble had swiftly left to Helia’s confusion and relief. 

Whenever she discovered Templar artifacts- weapons, shields, armor, books- she would give them to him. Despite not approving of the current actions of the Templars, Cullen still wished to preserve them in some way. While Helia wasn’t sure how to do so, she somewhat agreed. She did say that the best way to at least preserve the order’s history was to collect relics from its past. Cassandra did mention that Helia once said “Templars and Mages can coexist. They need to interact positively though. What if we combined Tevintar’s model of circles with the good parts of the circles here? Universities where magic can be studied but mages are not trapped inside. They can have jobs and lives outside of it.”

Cullen was surprised when she returned with flower crowns from the Exalted Plains. Apparently, the children of the Dalish clan there gave them to Helia as gifts after she dealt with grave robbers close by, making the area safer for them. He was more surprised when she placed one on his head. Her smile was worth leaving it on during his meeting with an Orlesian general.

He was getting better with not becoming a flustered mess after sharing a kiss with her. Not so good with her random kisses on the cheek. Or when she made comments that while flirtatious in nature, are really innocent as she has no clue that she's flirting. Or when she hugged him when he least suspected it. 

“Cullen, why do shemlen men give girls they like rings? It makes no sense!” She once asked him, leading to an explanation on human courting. She decided that it sounded similar to Dalish courtship, giving each other gifts. It wasn’t until she left he realized she had been wearing the lucky coin he gave her as a pendant. And that he essentially discussed marriage with her. 

Many a time he held meetings in his office with his cape missing. Helia would be curled up in his bed wrapped in it. Seeing as they had stretches of time without seeing each other, she missed being wrapped in his arms and his smell. So when he couldn’t spend time with her, she’d take his cape, scurry up the ladder to his room, and lay in his bed listening to his voice. 

He was wrapped around her finger and she didn’t seem to realize it. If she did, she sure as hell wasn’t telling him.

Can't draw for shit, so have screenshots of Helia and Cullen lol.

Chapter Text

Once Helia returned to her duties as Inquisitor, the first thing on her list of issues was dealing with Erimond. Tevintar had revoked all his claims as a magister and gave the Inquisition complete control over his sentence. The Grey Wardens had made mention that they would willingly deal with him themselves. Standing next to her throne, Cullen remained amazed at how she was able to shift from cheerful and loving to stern and unmoving. The Inquisitor was essentially a separate person from Helia. She commanded order and peace, but was not without mercy. The only punishment she never gave out was execution. It was possible, however, that fact would change today. 

Erimond was trying to appear defiant, but Cullen could see the fear in the mage’s eyes at the sight of the Inquisitor. He didn’t know what exactly had occurred in Adamant’s courtyard, but whatever happened put the fear of the Maker into the other man. 

“The charges laid against you, Livius Erimond, are rather grave. Blood magic, allying with Corypheus, corruption and attempted corruption of Grey Wardens, the attempted summoning of a demon army, and casting the mind of the Inquisition’s Commander into the hands of Corypheus’ ally, the Nightmare Demon.” She leaned back into her throne and touched her fingertips together. “Such grievous crimes against the entirety of Thedas, not to mention myself and my Commander. What is your defense?” She coldly asked. Cullen stared Erimond down, daring him to even try and say something stupid. On the other side of the throne stood Dorian, glaring at his countryman. He held no love for the Venatori, and had even suggested making Erimond Tranquil despite his opinion on the Rite. 

It was rare for a mage to even think about using the Rite as punishment for another mage. The mere idea that Helia had even taken it into consideration was shocking to just about everyone in Skyhold. Then again, Cassandra and Leliana had to ban the elf from the dungeons until Erimond’s trial.

The only time she had gone down to speak with the Venatori had not ended well. Erimond still had handprints around his neck from the incident. While Cullen wasn’t there, Cassandra had reccounted the event to him recently.

Standing in front of Erimond’s cell, the Inquisitor glared at the man who had caused so much pain and suffering. At least with Alexius, she could understand why he did what he did. He simply wished to save his son’s life from the Blight slowly eating away at him. She refused to execute him or make him Tranquil; instead, she sentenced him to aid the Inquisition- specifically the mages he once indentured- in magical research. Alexius had accepted this punishment, figuring that he deserved it. 

Erimond, however, had no such motivations. He simply did what he did because he saw Corypheus as a god. There was no reason behind tricking the Wardens except to further the darkspawn’s plans. Had he shown even the slightest bit of remorse, maybe she would have felt pity,

“You. The knife eared thief. If you’ve come to taunt me, you won’t succeed.” He spat, returning her glare. Helia opened the door and walked inside. He tensed up. The man’s arm hadn’t healed from their last encounter and he really didn’t want to break anything else. “Why him. How and why did you choose to hand him over to that demon.” 

Erimond blinked before chuckling. “Oh, you mean your precious Commander? Oh don’t look so surprised. You think we wouldn’t learn about your relationship with him? Ever since you foiled our plans at the Winter Palace, we’ve been keeping even more tabs on you. After the failed ambush to capture him, we realized just how important he was to you.” He was smirking at her, pride evident in his voice. He was proud of what he’d done.

“The Venatori had been developing that spell to use on you, but after that we decided what better way to cripple the Inquisition and get revenge on the thief than to sentence Cullen Rutherford to an endless sleep filled with nightmares. I didn’t expect you to run headfirst into the Fade to save him, however.” Erimond was so into his gloating he didn’t realize the rage building in Helia.

“I wonder, why didn’t he use his Templar abilities to silence our mages? Or is he truly a failure that he even ceased lyrium use and lost that-” Slender fingers wrapped around his windpipe as he was knocked to the ground. Pure hatred crossed the Inquisitor’s face as she tightened her hands around his throat. The dungeon guards had to drag her off him and out of the cell. The entire time she was struggling to get away and kill him herself. The former magister scrambled backwards in his cell to get as far away as possible from the murderous woman, screaming threats at her as she was kicked out of the dungeon.

   “I don’t recognize your authority! The Inquisition has no power over my actions! And killing me would simply free me to aid my master in another form.” Erimond spat in response. “On the contrary. Orlais, Fereldan, and Tevintar have agreed to support the Inquisition’s judgement. So yes, We do have power over you.” Helia replied, smirking down at him. Cullen shivered slightly. She could be rather intimidating when she wanted. Good thing he was on her side.

“So I led them astray! Who’s to say that Corypheus wouldn’t allow the Wardens to storm the Deep Roads after he fulfilled his goals?! They heard the Calling and would’ve done something like that without my help!”

Blue eyes narrowed as Helia coldly replied that she had been in that future and Corypheus had certainly never allowed them. The hall fell into silence after that, and Cullen swore you could’ve heard a pin drop. Erimond was stunned. It was obvious he hadn’t known the extent of her future knowledge. He was searching the room for something or someone to maybe get an edge over her and his eyes landed on Cullen. The former Templar stiffened under the other man’s gaze, doing his best to remain calm.

“And your Templar there could have silenced that mage who cursed him. So it’s not my fault he was sent into the Fade.” Erimond grinned as he continued, clearly enjoying the discomfort the two displayed, “I merely helped develop it and taught the Grey Warden mage the spell. I didn’t force you to go after him.”

Cullen could feel his panic build as Erimond went on about how Helia could have simply left him in the Fade. She wouldn't, right? That wasn’t ever considered, right?! And maybe it was his fault. If he was still taking lyrium, he could have silenced any mage near him-

Helia stood up suddenly, spooking everyone. Surprisingly, she didn’t seem angry with Erimond- instead she was oddly calm. Dorian stepped forward to stop her but was stopped as she raised her hand. “Magister Livius Erimond. Before he left, Warden Stroud suggested a rather fitting punishment for you. Seeing as you are so intent on assisting them, you are hereby sentenced to join several Grey Wardens on their way to the Deep Roads. There are areas that darkspawn are reluctant to show themselves in, and having live bait that isn’t tainted by the Blight is rather useful.” 

The blood in the mage’s face drained as the gravity of his sentence set in. “What?! You’d sentence someone to be darkspawn bait?! Just kill me if that’s what you want!” He cried, clearly starting to panic. 

“You said you’d welcome death. Therefore, it’s not a good punishment. And the Grey Wardens should get a say in your punishment. This way everyone is happy. I could easily toss you into a Fade Rift if you would prefer that.” The Inquisitor replied almost… cheerfully. It was rather disturbing, watching her smile as Erimond was taken away kicking and screaming. “Had you sent me into the Fade, I would be fine. But seeing as you dragged Commander Rutherford into it, any chances of pity from me is gone. And had you simply admitted your guilt, maybe you’d simply be imprisoned. But you refused.” With that she turned and left the room through the door leading to her quarters. Cullen quickly followed her in hopes to understand what had upset her. She never left like that nor gave out such punishments.

He found her hyperventilating inside a small storage alcove in her room. “He deserves it he deserves it oh Mythal what have I done?!” She started to scratch at her arms. Cullen had discovered early on that when she became extremely stressed or panicked, Helia would start to scratch at herself. She was good at hiding it too; Cullen had only discovered it while treating her wounds after a rather brutal battle to take a keep. She had refused to let anyone look at her arm and he had to basically hold her down to simply roll her sleeve up to clean the wound.

She was afraid he wouldn’t love her anymore if he saw them. That fear dissipated after Cullen gently took her arm and kissed each scar and cleaned up any healing marks before bandaging them up. He smiled at her and reassured her that he loved everything about her and nothing would change that.

Seeing her in the throws of a panic attack, he headed to her quickly and gently took her hands, keeping her from scratching. Helia struggled to get her hands free but he refused to let go, sinking to the floor with her. He waited until she started to calm down before he said anything. “Helia-”

“I sentenced that man to death! And w-w-was happy about it!! Cullen I’ve never felt like that and I hate it!” She started to cry again. He pulled her into his lap, rocking her and rubbing her back until she finally calmed down. “Helia, the fact you feel guilty about sentencing him means you are a good person. No one should ever be pleased about executing anyone. And seeing how upset you get around him, I think nobody will blame you for your choice.”

They sat there together in silence for a while until Cullen decided to carry her to bed. He ended up sleeping there with her after he realized she was hugging his arm.

Chapter Text

Corypheus’ next move was still unknown to the Inquisition, and frankly Cullen was tired. Tired of not knowing where to look next, he instead turned to the letter his sister Mia had written him. She was relieved to finally receive a reply from him, and the moment she learned about Helia, she demanded to know everything about her. 

He knew if he didn’t respond his sister would show up in Skyhold and tear him a new one. When they were children, she always knew about his crushes and despite not knowing the extent of his trauma after Kinloch had become extremely protective of him. Then there was the fact that most Fereldans weren’t big fans of elves. The Hero of Fereldan had helped to raise public opinion of elves due to her allies being elves, but there was still intense prejudice towards them. He wasn’t sure how they would react to Helia or the fact that she and the Inquisitor were one and the same.

Regardless of her growing fame, there were still those who didn’t realize who Helia was at first. She very much wanted it to stay that way- she hated being seen as the Herald or as the Inquisitor. She had taken to wearing disguises when going to certain cities to avoid being noticed as Inquisitor. When recognized, people would fall to their feet in front of her or beg her to bless them. At least in places like Crestwood, the citizens were more interested in her as the Inquisitor as that meant she came to help them- seal the Rifts, deal with bandits, make the area overall safe again. 

But when she was with her Inner Circle, she was happier. Her friends looked beyond her status as Inquisitor and Herald and saw Helia Lavellan. The Dalish mage whose curiosity about the Fade and her people’s past made Solas smile. Who enjoyed hearing Varric’s tall tales. The girl who played pranks with Sera and gossiped with Dorian. The mage who shared drinks with Bull, learned about magic (and makeup) from Vivian,  and made toys with Blackwall. The elf who assisted Cole in helping people and exchanged history with Cassandra.

The woman who helped Josephine reestablish her family in Orlais and comforted Leliana after Adamant. The woman who, despite seeing all his flaws and knowing his past, still smiled the second she saw him and continued to love him. 

That was the Helia Cullen wished Thedas could see. But she had to put up the facade of being the Inquisitor. Of being the one leading order back into the world.  It drove her crazy, but she had to do it. The only comfort was that Ameridan was possibly the same. She said something about him spoke to her, like she had met him once. She didn’t understand herself, but it was comforting to at least think he was guiding her in spirit. 

Cullen preferred not to think about it. Being around Cole was enough regarding spirits for him. 

Looking back at the letter, he grabbed a blank sheet of paper and began to write. 

Dear Mia,

Yes, I’m fine. No, you are not coming to Skyhold to yell at the Inquisitor for my injuries at Adamant. I’m fine.

You asked about Helia. Specifically, how she and the Inquisitor share a name. You have probably figured it out already. They are the same person. Helia is Inquisitor Helia Lavellan. You are not to go telling everyone this. She gets very uncomfortable being referred to as Inquisitor or Herald. And yes, you can meet her after this business with Corypheus is dealt with.

Helia… Helia is so different from most people I’ve met. She has this gift to put you at ease but at the same time has this commanding presence. I want to protect her but I know she can handle herself. I’ll tell you more when you come visit.

Love, your brother,

Cullen

Finishing that letter, he moved on to the next letter on his desk. Alistair had written to him to make sure he was alright after Adamant. Cullen figured that while neither was good at keeping up with writing, he might as well write letters to his old friend.

Alistair,

Do I refer to you as King Alistair or just Alistair? Then again it’s hard picturing you as king. Remember when we were still in training and you snuck a Mabari pack into the Chantry? And somehow roped me into helping you. I thought that Sister was going to kill us!

I miss that. We were so innocent back then of just what horrors the world held. I wish we could go back there at times. But we can’t, so we must look forward.

Life in Skyhold has been slowly returning to normal. I have been recovering from that ordeal three months ago with Helia’s help. If not for her, I do not know what I’d do sometimes. She is the one good thing life has thrown at me in a very, very long time. Actually, she’s the one who said I should keep in touch with you. I’m not very good at that but I’ll try my best.

Hawke is still here. He said that as Corypheus is his fault, he’s not leaving until this is all dealt with. I… I’m still conflicted about that. He and I have a rocky history with one another and honestly, it means he gets to tease me. Apparently the whole “Cullen Rutherford can’t talk to girls” thing will never go away. And I thought Varric and Sera were bad enough.

Hopefully there are no repercussions regarding your absence to help Inquisition forces at Adamant Fortress. We should meet up after we defeat Corypheus.

From,

Cullen

Sealing the envelopes up, he handed them to the scout standing by his desk. He stretched before leaving his office himself. There was a game of Wicked Grace he didn’t plan on missing tonight.

Chapter Text

It wasn’t unusual for Helia to pass through Cullen’s office on her way to say hello to Blackwall or restock on supplies. What wasn’t normal was for her to return almost instantly, bursting through the door and nearly falling flat on her face. Her intrusion disturbed Grima, the Mabari that normally slept under Cullen’s feet. He lifted his head groggily, staring at Helia. He whined in discontent when Cullen stood up and the dog was forced to move off his feet before getting comfy and falling back to sleep. 

“Helia? What’s wrong? Are you alright-”

“Blackwall’s gone!”

Her words hit him like a ton of bricks. Blackwall? Gone? The older man rarely strayed far from the barn and when he did, it was to go to the tavern. To hear that he left Skyhold with no intentions to return was strange. The Warden preferred his solitude, yes, but several members of the Inquisition had started to grow on him, that much was clear. Sera would share dirty jokes with him while Bull would spar and exchange weapon ideas and tactics. 

Helia had gotten the closest to him, and it was obvious he took her in like a father figure. Blackwall shared more with her than anyone else and wasn’t afraid to threaten Cullen on occasion (not that the Commander minded. He was happy that he wasn’t the only person ready to hurt someone should they hurt Helia). It was obvious the group looked to him for advice when out on their adventures. 

The fact Blackwall had vanished without saying where he was going and a note stating he wasn’t returning was disturbing. “According to Leliana he was keeping up with some man’s trial in Val Royeaux but it had nothing to do with him!” Helia was pacing in front of his desk, rubbing her arms. Cullen took her hands into his, knowing where she was heading. Tracing circles on the back of her hands with his thumbs, he looked at her in concern. “Helia. Breathe. He was following a trial?” He asked. She nodded in response, taking deep breaths to calm down. “Alright. You go to Val Royeaux. I’ll speak with Leliana and see if she knows anything about this Mornay and if he has any connections to Blackwall.” She nodded again and Cullen kissed the top of her head before they parted ways.

Walking up the stairs to the rookery, he saw the Spymaster writing up a report. He cleared his throat to get her attention, knowing that there was no time to waste. “Cullen. I assume you’re here about Warden Blackwall?” She asked, looking up at him. He nodded. “I was hoping you know if he has any connections to Mornay?” 

“Yes. I do.” She handed him the report she had just finished and waited for him to read it over before continuing. “The Warden Blackwall we know is really Thom Rainer, a former Orlesian army captain who led his men to assassinate an Orlesian nobleman who supported Celene. They massacred him, his wife, and their children, When it came out what he’d done, Rainer fled. Mornay was one of his men.”

Cullen frowned, and almost immediately wanted to vomit. The man who he respected, had shared drinks with, who he looked up to , was responsible for such a crime?! And yet, he fought, as a Warden, for the Inquisition. He risked his life for innocent people, and had apparently been on his way to become a Warden. Letting out a sigh, he turned to leave. “Cullen?” Leliana asked, and he looked over his shoulder.

“If he ends up arrested, we have the resources to bring him here to Skyhold for judgement. After everything he’s done for us, it’s the least we can do.” 

He simply nodded in response before leaving. 

Entering Val Royeaux’s prison, Cullen could hear Helia and Blackwall talking from the top of the stairs. Leaning against a wall nearby, he listened to the end of their conversation.

“Regardless of what you’ve done in the past, it's clear that you are trying to do better, You are a good person, Thom. You made bad decisions in the past, but that doesn’t define the man you are now.” Helia’s voice floated up the stairs. Ever the optimist. 

“... Please, just leave me. Please Helia, just go.” Blackwall- no, Rainer sounded so defeated and ashamed of himself. Likely because he never wanted her to see him like this. Cullen felt some pity for him, after all he knew the feeling. Helia had seen both men at their worst, and yet she didn’t seem to care. She saw past all of that. 

“Okay… but I’m gonna fix this!” The sound of footsteps got louder as she approached the top of the stairs. She didn’t seem to notice Cullen as she hurried by to the door. 

“Helia.”

She stopped, turning to see him. He noted how she visibly relaxed and gave a weak smile. “Please tell me you have good news.” He sighed and shook his head, hating how her face fell. “This is from Leliana. It’s a detailed report on Thom Rainer.”

She took it from him and stared at it. It was clear she was afraid to read it, to learn this wasn’t a mistake. 

“Summarize it. Please.”

“Warden-Constable Blackwall has been dead for some time. Thom Rainer is the man down in that cell. He led a massacre with his men and ran when the truth came to light. We could bring him to Skyhold for judgement, if you wish.”

“Cullen… um… if you were in my position, what would you do?”

He bit his lip and met her gaze. “Any respect I had for him is gone. What he did to the men who trusted him is despicable. And yet… he fought as a Warden. He willingly joined us and fought alongside the Inquisition, and then when he could have remained in hiding and let his past die with him he instead gives himself up to save one of the very men he betrayed? It’s…. It’s confusing.”

“You still have respect for him.”

He nodded. “To do what he did today… that takes courage. Not many would do that knowing they would hang.”

Helia was silent for several minutes. He was about to ask if she was alright when she finally spoke. “Find a way to get him to Skyhold. And hurry.” 

Cullen nodded again and led her out. She was lost on thought, her brow furrowed and eyes narrowed. “Why wouldn’t he just tell me…” She whispered before heading off into the city. She likely was on her out of the city and off to the Emerald Graves to think. The place helped her to clear her head and think, and sometimes study the place her ancestors made their last stand. Helia had asked to take him there someday as she wanted to show him all the places she went to that he couldn’t see. He promised that when this was all over, they would go adventuring together.

   Watching Helia pass judgement on Thom Rainer was heartbreaking, to say the least. Despite trying to appear as Inquisitor, she almost immediately broke down when her ally was brought before her. Deciding to pardon Rainer in order for him to atone and become the man Blackwall saw he could be, she finally discarded her duty as Inquisitor as rushed to hug the older man the second his shackles were removed. She was scolding him for not coming to her with the truth and instead vanishing like that, crying in relief that he decided to stay with the Inquisition. Rainer had simply hugged her, eyes closed and doing his best to soothe her. 

Cullen may not be a fan of the older warrior anymore, but seeing as Rainer treated Helia like a daughter, he would try and learn to trust him again.

Chapter Text

Solas stormed back into his study. He had just witnessed- yet again- the Inquisitor and Commander stealing a kiss on the battlements. Jealousy boiled inside him seeing Helia in the arms of another- especially a Templar’s. How could she not understand the dangers and horrors that were the Templar Order? It was one thing for her to be alright with shelems- they were starting to grow on Solas- but one who at one point held so much power over the life of magic users? Granted, Cullen wasn’t a Templar anymore, and he had ceased his lyrium use, but he still either committed atrocities or enabled them. 

And yet, Helia would run to see him whenever they returned to Skyhold. She ran willingly into the Fade to save him. She refused to perform her duties as Inquisitor for three months, stating she needed time to recover when everyone knew the real reason was because she wanted to help Cullen recover after Adamant. In that time alone several Rifts had opened, Red Templar numbers had spiked, and who knows what progress Corypheus has made. Solas had attempted to speak with her during that time despite Dorian’s warning that it wasn’t a good idea. 

He really wished he took Dorian’s advice.

The moment he entered the couple’s sight, Cullen had a panic attack. He was begging the elf to leave him alone, to not hurt him, to just kill him and stop torturing him . Helia had glared daggers at Solas and mouthed for him to get out. He had obeyed, and as he fled back down the stairs he saw the human man clinging to the tiny woman while she rubbed his back, whispering comforting words into his ear as she did. Later, she cornered him in his study and tore him a new one.

“Solas what the fuck! I gave explicit instructions for mages not to come anywhere near both my and Cullen’s quarters! I had just barely gotten him to realize that he was safe here and no one would harm him and your appearance sent him into another panic attack!”

“Helia I-”

“No! I don’t want to hear your excuse! You are lucky he didn’t completely revert to how he was a month ago or we wouldn’t be having this conversation! I am still doing my duties, I’m just not leaving Skyhold unless there is an emergency like the Breach reopening or Corypheus being found.”

It wasn’t until Solas decided to check on Cullen while in the Fade did he see the Desire, Terror, and Despair demons hovering over his sleeping form. When asked, Despair had been polite enough to explain they hadn’t been able to get this close in sometime and due to his torture by the Nightmare, the barriers he had erected to keep them at bay had fallen. Solas questioned what they meant, and Terror had replied stating “Oh, you know the story of Kinloch Hold and how its Circle fell? And that only one Templar survived? That man is the sole Templar.” That was the moment Solas realized the extent of what the other man had endured. Not only was he traumatized by Adamant, but Cullen was dealing with previous trauma and the possibility of possession by demons he had been holding back since the Fifth Blight. 

The Inquisitor was still refusing to talk to him. He was lucky if she even looked in his general direction. It had been 3 months since then, 4 since Adamant. Helia never struck him at holding a grudge, yet here they were. 

Solas missed her smile, her openness, the way her eyes sparkled in awe as he told her about his adventures in the Fade. She was likely one of the few good things that came out of the Dalish. She still worshipped the Elven gods, which he wasn’t a fan of, but she also was showing signs of believing in the Maker at the same time.  It was a strange concept- combining the old, Elven beliefs with that of the Chantry. But then again, Helia was seen as the Herald of Andraste, so if anyone could try and change the Chantry, she could. Helia also wasn’t afraid to go against Dalish beliefs and customs- she shared her knowledge with everyone and questioned their teachings. She was everything he wished the Dalish could be and then some. He never meant to fall in love, and yet as time went on her realized he had legitimate feelings for her. Feelings that went beyond respect and friendship into love. He had a chance once to be the one with her heart but he was too scared to make that move. But he was going to change that. Solas knew she deserved more than him but at the same time he couldn’t see her with anyone but him. 

A few days after he witnessed the couple kiss, during a late night walk to clear his head, he spotted the two heading into a hidden area of the courtyard. The spot was a secluded garden that Dorian and Helia had discovered and decided to share only with members of the inner circle. They all worked to clean it up and cut back some of the overgrowth but much of the garden was still wild. Some flower beds were cleaned up and each member of the group had their own place to grow what they wished. Her bed consisted of some star flowers, magnolias, snowdrops, and forget-me-nots, along with several berry bushes. Cullen, with help from Helia, had planted black-eyed susans, gladiolus, several herbs, and- to everyone’s surprise- dandelions. Helia explained when Bull pointed out that they were a weed that dandelions symbolized healing and perseverance.  Solas’ own flower bed had amaryllis, purple irises, yellow roses, and white poppies. 

Solas followed them and observed from behind a tree. Helia and Cullen stood towards the back of the garden where a mosaic of the sun and moon was detailed on a wall behind them. Cullen took Helia’s hand and the two started to dance. It was something Solas immediately felt like he was viewing something he was never meant to see (which, well, he was) but couldn’t look away. The elven woman was in a nightgown and her hair was free from the braided bun it normally was up in. Cullen was out of his armor and was in a simple tunic and trousers, and to the mage’s surprise his hair was curly. The way the two looked at each other only fueled Solas’ jealousy. He wished he was the one to hold her like that! And yet, the way Cullen looked at her was one of love. The elf had been secretly hoping maybe this relationship was a fling, that they would move on from each other, but it was clear Helia was serious about it and now he knew Cullen was as well.

She was Solas’ angel, the elf who other than himself still had a strong connection with the Fade- but was happy in the arms of a human knight.

Slipping away from the garden he quietly made his way back to his study. He would figure out how to win her heart. 

The Lion and the Wolf had only begun to fight for the Halla.

Chapter Text

When Hawke and Alistair burst into her chambers, Cullen in a headlock and Solas trailing behind them, Helia was very confused. She was sitting at her desk reading a book on her predecessor in hopes to learn something about him when they had come running up the stairs.

“Uh, hi? Alistair I thought you were in Ferelden!? Wait, Hawke why is Cullen in a headlock?!” The mage simply grinned at her. “Helia, is it alright if we borrow your Commander and elf? We’re taking them camping! Plus they deserve a break!” Hawke asked, clearly ignoring the former Templar squirming in his grip. “I came with Fereldan forces to aid the Inquisition. And we can search for Corypheus while we’re out!” Alistair added, also ignoring his friend trying to get free. “Hawke! Let go of me!” Cullen snapped, freezing and blushing when he heard Helia’s giggling.

“Camping? Well, he could use some time away from Skyhold. And Solas, I take its to somewhere you haven’t visited in the Fade before?” 

The other elf nodded, clearly irritated by the other three men but happy she was talking to him again. Alistair at least seemed somewhat apologetic for dragging Cullen up to her room, the Champion on the other hand didn’t seem to care. “Well… my Commander would benefit from some time with friends… and Solas could help if you come across Elven ruins... ”

Cullen looked at her in shock. “Helia you can’t seriously be considering this!” 

“Why not? It would be good for you! Plus they are your friends!”

Letting out a sigh, he relented and nodded. She had a point. He just wished they weren’t lying to her. 

In reality, the four of them were going to scout out the area Gaspard’s hunt would take place in. When Hawke learned just what was going on, he decided he wanted in on the plan to stop it and dragged the three up to her quarters despite the Commander’s objections. Cullen wished he could tell her, but he was afraid to place her in danger. It was bad enough Solas would be in danger; they had no idea if anyone related to the hunt would be there. 

“I’ll be heading out to the Western Approach anyways. I promised a professor out there to help with his dragon studies!” Helia said, smiling. This meant she would be returning with some sort of injury. Dragon hunting almost always meant the team would come back to Skyhold with an assortment of injuries. It also meant Cullen would be in a minor panic despite knowing she could handle herself. Apparently unlike most mages, Helia had a tendency to get up close and personal when necessary. She wasn’t afraid to use her staff as a melee weapon, something Cullen couldn’t remember ever seeing or hearing yet knew it as a fact. She was a strange mage, but she was his strange mage.

And that is how he found himself traveling to the Emerald Graves alongside a very grumpy elf, a king, and a very annoying bastard. Because Hawke was a very annoying bastard. Like right now.

“So, the world really is ending. Cullen is actually dating someone!” Hawke teased from his horse. Alistair snickered, earning a glare from Cullen. “Don’t start. It's not a big deal.”

“But it is! In Kirkwall you would become a flustered mess when a lady spoke to you!”

“He was the same while we were training and at the Circle. All the female Mages and Templars thought you were adorable, especially after they flirted with you.” Alistair smiled as he recalled the past. Solas raised an eyebrow but remained silent. Cullen didn’t know why he was acting so cold towards him lately. Ever since Adamant, Solas had suddenly refused to even look at him. He was always distant, but he seemed to at least grow semi-friendly with the Commander. Now, it was either he ignored him or glared at him. 

“The Commander has not outgrown those traits. The Inquisitor seems to make him a permanent shade of red.”

Speaking of the elf, he finally spoke. Hawke’s eyes widened and he rode up to Cullen’s horse so he was at his side. “Oh really? So Varric is right!” He was grinning, which meant he was up to something. “That rogue had mentioned you two but I wasn’t sure he was telling the truth til I saw it myself.”

“I didn’t either. Then again, the first time I met her they weren’t together yet. Might as well have been though. The way he spoke about her the way to Redcliffe-”

“Okay okay, let’s change the subject!” Cullen said, his cheeks turning pink. His old friends laughed while Solas gave a faint smile in his direction. Of course these three enjoyed teasing him. Why did he agree to come with them?

The sun had begun to set by the time they found a good place to camp. Putting up his tent, Cullen looked around at his surroundings. They had discovered some Elven ruins close to the mansion that was used for the hunt to rest in and use as a base for the next few days. The ruins were surprisingly intact for the most part; the only evidence that it hadn’t seen use in ages was the amount of overgrowth. Nature had retaken the structure and yet, it was like it was meant to be that way. A statue of a halla stood at the center with some offerings likely left by elves passing by. Solas had said the structure may have been a shrine to Ghilan'nain based on the statue, and was likely created as a rest stop and a place to pray for safe travels. 

Cullen wished Helia could see the place. There was something beautiful about the elven gods and the way they were worshiped. Helia said that Mythal may have guided Andraste in her quest to serve the Maker, as the goddess of justice would certainly want to give those sacrificed or forced into slavery justice. He told her that perhaps both Andraste and Mythal had chosen her to lead the Inquisition. She had only responded with pink cheeks and a smile. 

“Hey Curly, you got that look on your face again!”

He really wished he was with her. 

Hawke grabbed his shoulder and Cullen sighed, turning to face the other man. “We’re discussing our next move. Thought you’d want to join.” He waited for a response, getting one in the form of a nod. “Alright. Meet you over at the campfire then.”

Cullen nodded again, his finger rubbing the small halla pendant around his neck. It was comforting having something from Helia with him. Raising it to his lips, he kissed it and sent a silent prayer to the Maker to protect her before joining the others.

Solas was glaring daggers at him, something clearly bothering him. Cullen chose to ignore it for the time being, sitting on a log by the fire. Alistair was stirring some stew while Hawke looked over a map of the area. “Finally came to join us, Cullen?” Alistair asked, smiling at his friend. “Yes. Any ideas on how we do this?” 

Hawke shrugged, not looking up. “This is supposedly a supply road for the mansion. Chances are they are going to be traveling using this road. If we watch it, we possibly can catch any suppliers and question them. One has to know when the hunt occurs.” He said, closing up the map and looking up. “I was able to hear several would be dropping things off this week. If my contacts are to be trusted, the first comes tomorrow.”

“What contacts would that be?” The king asked. “Lelianna. Who else?” 

Alistair chuckled, shaking his head. “Should’ve known. She does know how to get information without saying where it came from.”

Cullen nodded with a smile. Solas was staring at the three before finally speaking. 

“How exactly do you three know each other?”

The three men looked at each other. 

“Where to even start…”

“Don’t look at me, I only knew him for a couple of years in Kirkwall.”

“I guess I’ll start.”

Alistair leaned back on his log with a grin. “Cullen and I met as children. We had only just started our Templar training, and we quickly became best friends. We were inseparable until shortly before we were supposed to take our vows. I ended up leaving to join the Wardens while Cullen stayed. We didn’t see each other until… until we dealt with Uldred. Not long after I became king, I inquired where he was and they told me he was sent to Kirkwall. We only started talking again recently.”

Hawke sighed knowing it was his turn. “Cullen was Knight Captain in Kirkwall. While we had opposing views, we managed to work together and eventually became friends. I wouldn’t be here if he didn’t stand up to Meridith. After the Conclave exploded, I was relieved to hear from Varric that not only was he alright, but that he had run into Cullen. Been getting letters from him since.” 

The man in question shook his head. “So Varric has been your spy then?”

“Not really a spy, more like a friend keeping an eye on another friend.” Hawke replied with a grin. “Varric was worried about you. You’re his friend, no matter what you think.”

“He managed to trick me into a game of Wicked Grace where I lost all my clothes.” Cullen deadpanned, earning laughter from Alistair. Solas remained quiet, observing the trio. They were laughing and swapping stories with each other, and if Solas didn’t know any better they had been best friends forever and not rivals at any point. 

That night, Cullen found he had a very strange dream. Maybe it was due to sleeping in elven ruins or maybe it was because he missed his beloved, but regardless it was a strange dream.

Donned in his armor, he entered an intact version of the shrine. Praying in front of the statue was an elven woman, dressed in pure white and a crown that resembled the antlers of a halla. As he approached, the woman turned and he realized it was Helia. Or at least, she looked like her. Except for her eyes. Her eyes were glowing gold, and the magic coming off her was different than what Helia’s felt like. Helia’s magic was warm and protective; this woman’s magic felt dangerous and feral yet protective as well. She smiled at him and cupped his cheeks with her hands, gazing lovingly at him. “Fereldan Lion, Child of the Avvar, I am Ghilan'nain, the Halla Mother. Or what little of me I can send through the Veil. You have chosen to love one of my children, one who chose me as her patron deity. As your love for her is just as strong as her love for you, I grant you some of my power.” Taking his pendant in one hand, she closed her eyes and kissed it. When she let it go, it felt warmer and glowed even brighter than before. “Not only will your path always lead you to your destination safely, you will always find each other regardless of the distance. I must ask you, Lion, that you protect her from those who wish her harm, and from the Dread Wolf who seeks nothing more than to steal her away from all.” 

Cullen was confused by her request. He had pledged to keep Helia safe, but from his understanding Fen’Harel had disappeared at the same time the Elven pantheon had been sealed away. Why would he target Helia? Ghilan'nain seemed to sense his questions, as she smiled at him. “Your questions are understandable, my child. But my time here is ending as I can feel myself being drawn back across the Veil. I was only able to speak to you here due to my shrine. Protect her, Lion, protect her and be at her side always. She will face challenges going forward and I cannot aid her myself. Goodbye, my child.” 

With that, he woke up. Poking his head out of his tent, he looked around. It was the middle of the night and his friends were asleep in their tents. Ducking backing inside, Cullen laid back down and tried to get comfortable. Was that truly Ghilan'nain? What did she mean by challenges? And just who was Fen’Harel?

Unknown to Cullen, dreaming of a world without the Veil and Helia at his side, was who he was looking for, in the tent across from his.

Chapter Text

Alistair stretched and let out a yawn. He only saw Solas sitting by the campfire making breakfast, so Hawke and Cullen were likely still asleep. Joining the elf by the fire, the two sat in silence for a bit. He closed his eyes and relaxed, taking in the sounds around him. The forest always felt more like home than the castle or barracks. It was calming being free of his responsibilities for the time being. He was in no rush to return to them, but he knew he would have to eventually.

Solas was staring at him, thinking hard about something. “Do I have something on my face?” Alistair asked, uncomfortable with the staring. You’d think after a decade of being king, he would have gotten used to people staring. Nope. 

“It is amazing to see a half elf in a place of power. I’m impressed.”

“WHAT?!”

Solas seemed surprised by his reaction. “I assumed you knew. While it’s difficult to normally tell, your eyes give you away.”

Hawke poked his head out of his tent and told them to shut up. “The sun’s not even up yet! Shut the damn hell up!” He snapped before ducking back into his tent. The two looked at the tent before continuing their discussion. “I’m not a half elf.”

“Yes, yes you are. No need to deny it.”

“How-But-”

“Children born to a human and an elf appear human. Most never reveal they have elven blood to others.” Solas explained like he was listing off what he ate for dinner. Alistair finally understood why Lelianna wanted so badly to punch him. This elf was so infuriating sometimes!

“I know that! I… I have so many questions for my uncle when I get back.”

“Understandable.”

It was soon discovered these men should never drink large quantities of alcohol.

They had stopped a merchant on his way to the mansion to ask about the hunt, but the man was shocked to learn what occurred there. He promised to try and gather intel for the Inquisition regarding Gaspard and left the shipment of alcohol with them. That evening, Hawke suggested they try some alcohol.

This is how Solas found himself sitting, tipsy, with three idiots. Apparently none of them could hold their liquor. At all.

Cullen was apparently a flirty drunk. A very clingy, flirty drunk. He currently was hanging off Alistair, clearly trying to flirt but clearly couldn’t flirt. “H-Hey baby, you knows what you looksh like? Royalty, that’sh who!”

Alistair was laughing and swaying from side to side. He was a happy drunk, giggling nonstop. Everything was funny to him, even after he fell off the log he sat on. “You- hic - look like the king of Fer- hic -eldan! It’s the truth! Hic ”

Hawke was laying on the ground staring up at the sky. He was a philosophical drunk apparently. “Yo… have you guysh ever wondered why we’re here? Like are we elvesh? Humansh? What if dragonsh… are really talking to ush when they breath fire?” He wondered aloud, eyes glassy as he looked over at them. Cullen grinned and winked at him. “Any-thingsh possible with me, cutie~”

“Cul- hic -len! You have a gir- hic -lfriend!” Alistair scolded, only resulting in the other man leaning over his shoulder. “Jealoush?” The king became flustered and argued that he wasn’t. Looking at Solas, he pointed and said “He’s hic jealous!”

“I certainly am not.”

“Are too!!”

Solas chuckled and shook his head. He had a high tolerance for alcohol, and had thought three Fereldan men would as well. And all this? Totally blackmail material. Maybe he’d share it with Varric at least. The dwarf would love it.

“What if Helia really ish Andra-sh-te? Like, we don’t know what sshhe looked like, maybe shhe wash an elf.” Hawke suggested,causing the other two to stop and consider his words. “I highly doubt that. Isn’t she meant to be at your Maker’s side?” Solas replied, rolling his eyes. “Yeah but… Helia ish pretty smoking.” Cullen added, resulting in Alistair erupting into laughter.

“Smoking! I get hic it! Because she was burned hic at the stake!”

“Oh my Maker Cullen… you can’t ju-sht say that!!” Hawke gasped, sitting up. Cullen was giggling at his comment, pointing at Hawke. “You shhouldn’t talk! You have a bir-dsh name!”

“Do not!”

“Do to!”

The two started arguing over if Hawke’s father was secretly a bird or not. Alistair was crying from laughter at this point, rolling around in the grass and mentioning how it tickled. 

The following morning, Solas exited his tent to find the trio passed out around the remains of their fire. He had went to bed shortly after Hawke suggested they climb a tree to grab the moon. It appeared they weren’t hurt, but the Champion was naked and Cullen was halfway into a pond. Alistair was in the same spot he was when Solas left him- on the ground behind his log. 

The elf got to work making tea. As much as he hated it, the kind he was making was a hangover cure. They would certainly need it.

Cullen regretted his life decisions as they returned to Skyhold. They had managed to get intel into possible leads that he hoped would help Lelianna in finding out the date of the hunt, but at the cost of hangovers and several embarrassing stories being shared. Mostly about him.

(“He really has curly hair.”

“Alistair I do not-”

“It’s true. In Kirkwall it was all curls. Why do you think his name is Curly?”)

He had to admit, it was fun. Solas had even warmed up to him again by the end of it, and he had enjoyed spending time with his old friends. They should do this again. 

Maybe with the rest of the group next time. And he certainly had to bring Helia to that shrine again. If his strange dream was real, maybe she would get to speak with the Halla Mother herself. His smile grew as he thought of how excited she would be. Maker, he missed her. Hopefully she was back from the Approach already.

Riding through the gates of Skyhold, he was surprised to see Dorian waiting for him. The man was a mess- covered in bandages and a nasty black eye. He seemed worried about something, and the moment they made eye contact Cullen knew something was wrong.

Dismounting from his mount he hurried over to his friend. “Dorian? What happened?! Weren’t you with Helia in the Approach?!” He asked, starting to panic. Helia would never let anyone return in this state alone- she would have accompanied them back to Skyhold herself. The way Dorian looked away only raised more concern. 

"Dorian what happened?!”

“Cullen I… I’m sorry. The Red Templars… they took her. They took Helia.”

Chapter Text

Cullen regretted his life decisions as they returned to Skyhold. They had managed to get intel into possible leads that he hoped would help Lelianna in finding out the date of the hunt, but at the cost of hangovers and several embarrassing stories being shared. Mostly about him.

(“He really has curly hair.”

“Alistair I do not-”

“It’s true. In Kirkwall it was all curls. Why do you think his name is Curly?”)

He had to admit, it was fun. Solas had even warmed up to him again by the end of it, and he had enjoyed spending time with his old friends. They should do this again. 

Maybe with the rest of the group next time. And he certainly had to bring Helia to that shrine again. If his strange dream was real, maybe she would get to speak with the Halla Mother herself. His smile grew as he thought of how excited she would be. Maker, he missed her. Hopefully she was back from the Approach already.

Riding through the gates of Skyhold, he was surprised to see Dorian waiting for him. The man was a mess- covered in bandages and a nasty black eye. He seemed worried about something, and the moment they made eye contact Cullen knew something was wrong.

Dismounting from his mount he hurried over to his friend. “Dorian? What happened?! Weren’t you with Helia in the Approach?!” He asked, starting to panic. Helia would never let anyone return in this state alone- she would have accompanied them back to Skyhold herself. The way Dorian looked away only raised more concern. 

“Dorian what happened?!”

“Cullen I… I’m sorry. The Red Templars… they took her. They took Helia.”

He remembered rushing to the War Room in hopes this was a cruel joke. Upon slamming the doors open, he was faced with Leliana, Cassandra, and Josephine turning to face him. The looks on their faces was all he needed to confirm this wasn’t a joke or a dream. 

“Cullen…”

“Maker help us…”

“Cullen, we’re looking everywhere for her but-”

He felt anger well up in him as he punched the wall. Hot tears ran down his face as he stood there silently before finally looking up at them. 

“How long has she been missing.”

Cassandra stepped forward, moving to place a hand on his shoulder. He slapped it away, repeating the question. 

“How. LONG?!”

“... Two days. We sent scouts to find you, but they also went missing.” Leliana replied quietly. Cassandra had begun to say something to him, but the only thing Cullen could hear was the sound of rushing blood in his ears. She was gone.

According to Dorian, Bull, and Sera, their trip to the Western Approach had been going well up until they entered the Still Ruins. Venatori were searching for something inside and the group had decided to deal with them and seal a Rift frozen in time. When they exited, Red Templars were waiting for them and ambushed the group. They were already worn out and low on healing potions from fighting inside, so what was a hard fight was even harder. 

“She had been right next to me and Sera when a Behemoth hit us. I woke up to find Bull carrying me, a letter addressed to you, and Helia gone.” Dorian told him, ashamed that he let this happen. Cullen assured the mage it wasn’t his fault. He was tired, already injured, and was hit by a monster. Cullen would’ve been in the same situation.

The letter came from Samson, filled with more taunts and offers to join. If it wasn’t the only lead they had, he would’ve torn it to shreds. 

Cullen!

You never returned my last letter! Then again you never were very good at that, were you? I swear when that letter your sister- Mia, was it?-  sent got to you in Kirkwall, you were ready to jump out the highest window in the Gallows! 

You never bought into the Chantry’s lies, did you? If you had, you’d still be taking lyrium. Before you wonder how I know, I have my ways. You did buy into Meredith’s views on Mages, but at least you had a reason. But then you left the Order to join the Inquisition while Kirkwall was still in shambles. 

My offer still stands. You can stand with us and rebuild the Templars into something great. Something that doesn’t need the Chantry holding us back. I know you want to do just that, Cullen. Drink the red lyrium and let the song tell you the truth. Corypheus wants nothing more than to become a caring, attentive god. Why is that such a bad thing?

Or do you truly believe your Inquisitor is Andraste’s herald? I can’t wait to meet her. I apologize for my words about her last time. She isn’t a knife ear, just an elf. She’s still a thief who stole the Anchor from my Master. I wonder what her screams will sound like. Don’t worry, we won’t make her Tranquil- I abhor the Rite. After what it did to Maddox, I refuse to allow any mage to suffer it. Plus, what fun would it be to torture her if she felt no emotions?

I have a feeling we’ll see each other again soon, old friend.

Samson

They were going to torture her. Cause her so much pain, all because she happened to obtain the Anchor. That stupid, stupid mark! She never asked for it; all she did was pick up the orb Corypheus dropped. If anything it causes her pain the closer she is to a Rift and has admitted to wanting to give all those people who wanted to kill her the hand with it. 

“If they want the stupid thing, they can take it! No need to kill me for it.”

He had to talk her out of chopping her own hand off. Helia’s reaction was due to Adamant, and she told him that she hated the Anchor due to what having it has caused. Cullen assured her none of that was her fault, and if not for the mark they would have never met. She had smiled and kissed him, stating that maybe Corypheus was good for something.

Cullen thought about his dream a bit more. Was that a warning she had been taken? Samson clearly wasn’t Fen’Harel- if anything they were an elf. Or at least, that’s what Helia had told him. Who knows what form he really takes. But something told him Samson wasn’t the Dread Wolf. 

Solas had been silent since their return. Apparently he was trying to find her through dreaming in the Fade, but had no luck yet. Chances were her connection to the Fade was being blocked by a Red Templar’s silence ability. Unknown to Cullen, but Solas had decided to put his feelings towards the other man aside to focus on finding her. He could go back to hating him afterwards. Bringing Helia back safely was the priority right now. 

He couldn’t help but feel responsible for this. Had he stayed focused on his plans, maybe this wouldn’t have happened. The Breach wouldn’t have been an issue if the Veil was destroyed, afterall. But then Corypheus would get what he wanted and Helia likely would’ve been dragged into this anyways. Solas had a feeling that Ghilan'nain had reached through and spoken to Cullen back at her shrine, so she likely had some part in the woman’s involvement. Helia would have joined the Inquisition somehow, and after what she’d seen in the dark future, likely would’ve died trying to stop Corypheus. 

She brought light and color into this dull world. Solas would do anything to keep her in his life, to keep that light with him. And so he again tried to find her in the Fade.

Helia Lavellan was freezing. Sitting in a cage pulled by a Behemoth, she was unable to find shelter from the cold rain drenching her clothes and skin. Her head was throbbing, and when she touched her forehead she felt dried blood. 

Wonderful. They decided to keep her as a trophy instead of just killing her.

She couldn’t even summon a small flame for warmth. One of the Red Templars walking alongside the cart was silencing her magic. They had been for two days now. From what she had heard, they were to meet with some Venatori who would use magic to teleport them to Therinfal Redoubt, where Samson awaited them. She was just relieved her friends had hopefully gotten away and were getting help. The elf wasn’t exactly popular amongst the Templars, and the sooner she got out of this, the better. 

Actually meeting Samson was something she wasn't sure about. Part of her was certain some of the old Samson- the one who cared about others and had risked being kicked to the streets for helping a Mage- was still there, just buried. The rational part of her pointed out no sane person would willingly infect someone with red lyrium. Cullen’s voice echoed in her mind, reminding her that whatever good Samson has done is vastly outweighed by the bad. 

Cullen… he was likely in a panic. She promised him she would be alright and made him go on that trip. He was likely blaming himself for this. Yet another thing to add to the list of horrible things he had to go through because of her. Let’s see: there was seeing his former friends and Templars having turned into red lyrium infected monsters when they attacked Haven, attempted kidnapping, nightmares while trapped in the Fade, being retraumatized by mages, and now this. If anything, Helia wouldn’t blame him if he distanced himself from her. And yet, he stayed at her side. He put up with her stealing his cape, sitting on his lap, asking millions of questions, and everything else. Cullen seemed to find her antics endearing. It was one of the things she loved about him. He never seemed to mind her oddities and instead embraced them.

Right now she wouldn’t mind being embraced by him. For him to hold her in his arms, to tell her she was safe now, to pick her up and carry her to safety. 

“Stop the cart! The mage should be up ahead. I’ll go get him.”

But it seemed like she wouldn’t be that lucky. And that her suffering had only just begun.

Chapter Text

Samson was quite pleased with himself. Not only had his men disrupted Inquisition movements, but they managed to catch the Inquisitor herself! By now his rival had read the letter he left and was likely in a frenzy. It was clear without its leader, the Inquisition had started to panic. After all, without her they couldn’t close any Rifts, and if they couldn’t close Rifts the Veil would continue to tear. Which gives Corypheus more time to work.

Kneeling in front of him in the middle of Therinfal Redoubt was Helia Lavellan, Inquisitor and Herald of Andraste. She was glaring at him defiantly, blue eyes burning in anger. Her blonde hair had turned a brownish color from dried blood, and a nasty cut was scabbing over on her forehead. He had to admit, he could see why Cullen was attracted to her. Underneath all the dirt and grime she was rather pretty. 

“Inquisitor Lavellan! What an honor to have you here in our humble fortress!” Samson grinned and gave a fake bow. She remained silent, but her frown deepened. “We rarely have guests of such high status. I hope my men made sure your trip here was comfortable.”

“Oh yes. The blow to the head and the prodding from Venatori Mages were just wonderful.” Helia replied sarcastically. He chuckled and circled her, studying her. He remembered Dalish clans occasionally stopping outside Kirkwall to get supplies. They kept to themselves and avoided Templars like the plague. Not this one, though. All his reports made it clear that Helia was eager to interact with everyone, Templars included. 

“There’ll be more experiments with them. Those Venatori are enamored with the Anchor. Don’t worry, I’ll be there every time to make sure they don’t go too far. Can’t have you dying on us, now can I?”

“Maddox really trusted you. We… We buried him at Skyhold. I thought you should know.”

Those words made Samson freeze. Maddox was dead? He told him to abandon the shrine! He couldn’t be gone… He promised the Tranquil that he’d be safe, that Corypheus may know how to mend his connection with the Fade. Maddox was innocent in all this. He should have dragged him with him.

“Take her to the Venatori. Tell them I will join them next session.” He ordered, turning away as the Inquisitor was dragged to her feet and taken away. When he was finally alone, he left the tears stream down his face. Maddox, his friend, is gone.

Cullen ran his hands through his hair. They were on day four now following Helia’s abduction, and they had nothing. The only possible idea of where they took her was Therinfal Redoubt, but there was no way to mount an attack without being spotted as they approached. The fortress was heavily fortified so unless they had people on the inside, getting in would be close to impossible. 

“There is one way.” Solas had suggested at one meeting. “Samson wishes to speak with the Commander, correct? What if we were to use that as a distraction like we used Helia at Redcliffe? No doubt there are other, less guarded ways in.”

Cassandra nodded, taking what he said into consideration. “There is a drainage entrance used for runoff water and to prevent the moat from overflowing into the fortress… but sending Cullen in alone is a bad idea. It’s what he wants.”

“Not exactly. There is another person he would want.”

Helia was tired . 

Apparently Corypheus had taught a majority of his Mages how to disrupt the Anchor and as a result cause her immense pain. Plus they had clearly enjoyed draining some of her blood to use in blood magic. Now she sat in a tiny locked room, a Templar stationed outside the door silencing her magic. She couldn’t even try and dream in the Fade in hopes to escape this place even temporarily. Her wrists chained to the wall, she wasn’t able to move too far from her spot and at least explore her prison. 

She shivered from the cold. She wished she had Cullen’s cape. No. She wished Cullen was here, wrapping them both in his cape and keeping them both warm. He was always warm. He never objected to her crawling into his lap and snuggling into his chest. He always pulled his cape closer around them as he tried to do work. Somehow, Cullen managed to always become flustered by it but after she suggested he read the reports to her, he had gotten better at doing his work with her around. She often would fall asleep to the sound of his voice and would wake up in his bed, tucked in and Cullen at his desk, asleep on reports. 

He had no idea just how precious he was to her. If she could, she would go back and protect him from everything he had been through, even if it meant never meeting him as a result. His happiness, his well being, all that meant more to her than her own happiness. Cullen was the first person to make her comfortable to open up to in the Inquisition. She remembered the many late night talks they had in Haven about everything going on, about Fereldan, their allies- everything and anything they could think of. 

“There was something beautiful about the Storm Coast.” Helia said, handing the bottle of wine to Cullen. The two sat on the roof of her hut, staring up at the stars. “Oh? According to Harding it’s nothing but rain, more rain, and even more rain.” He replied, taking a swig from the bottle.

“Yes, but it was serene almost. The Blades of Hessarian and some Red Templars are the only humans wandering around. There are Darkspawn, but they surprisingly are few and far between. Other than that, only wildlife. It’s a beautiful place.” She smiled, lying down on the roof. “I’d like to see it someday, then.” Cullen said, looking at her and smiling. “Tell me more, if you don’t mind.”

“Sure! Gimme that bottle though. It’s so sweet! I love it!”

He laughed and passed her the bottle, looking at the sky.

She treasured those moments. As the Inquisition went forward and they moved to Skyhold, their talks migrated to the hidden garden. One time after they decided to start courting each other, she came to see he had prepared a picnic to her delight. The pair ended up falling asleep there, Cassandra finding them cuddling in their slumber in the middle of the garden. 

Solas had his own opinions on their relationship, but hadn’t objected. If anything he had tried to come check on her and Cullen shortly after Adamant, only for her to yell at him and give him the silent treatment. She regretted it and had apologized recently. He told her she had nothing to apologize for. He had ignored her request, after all. Regardless, she brought him a bag of coffee beans as an apology gift. She never understood the infatuation with the stuff- it tasted disgusting- but it did smell good, and she was delighted when Solas told her chocolate and coffee come from the same bean. He had chuckled and told her next time they go to Val Royeaux, he’d take her to a cafe that served drinking chocolate so she could try it.

Seeing her current situation, that wouldn’t be happening for a long time. She was pulled from her thoughts as the door opened and Samson entered, closing the door behind him.

“Yes?” She asked, trying to remain as neutral as possible. She refused to let him relish in her pain or anger. “Tell me- how did you convince Cullen to get off lyrium?”

“Excuse me? He did it himself. I simply supported his decision.” Helia replied. The former Templar’s eyes narrowed and he strode up to her. She was confused by his question and was going to ask what he meant when he backhanded her. “You LIAR! You can’t just quit lyrium! Why did he leave the Templars?!”

“He was disillusioned by what they’d become. Doesn’t mean he thinks they should end. He says reforming them, giving them safer alternatives to lyrium-” 

He hit her again. “The only way to save the Templars is to separate from the Chantry! Corypheus will lead us into a new age for the Templars! And Cullen could be part of that.”

“Cullen is more of a Templar than you could ever hope to be. And a better man. He understands that the Chantry isn’t the only one at fault! And I know you do as well!”

“You don’t know me! You know nothing about me!” He roared, strikning her once more before storming out. Her head wound had started bleeding again, and she had a feeling he gave her a black eye. She waited until she knew he was out of earshot to let out a quiet sob. She was going to die here. Whether it be by blood mages, Samson, or Corypheus, she was going to die. 

Helia curled up in a ball, hugging her sides as she sobbed. She wished her knight could save her, but that was what Samson wanted. Cullen couldn’t come here without risk of capture. And she knew what they’d do to him. They’d force feed him red lyrium and force him to fight for them. He’d become the very thing he hated, and she couldn’t allow that. 

Part of her knew Cullen would do anything to save her. But another part hoped he wouldn’t.

Cullen, Solas, Hawke, and Varric stood and watched as soldiers exhumed Maddox’s grave. Word had been sent to Samson with the offer to hand over the Tranquil’s body in exchange for safe passage to and from the fortress. He had accepted, and now came the hard part- sneaking in through the drainage entrance to find Helia and get her out. Solas, Cullen, and Varric were going in while Hawke would stay behind and keep Skyhold up and running. 

“I still don’t like this. It’ll take several days to travel there. Plus he no doubt has spies who are looking for Cullen.” Hawke grumbled, ignoring the glare Cullen gave in response. “And I feel uncomfortable digging up this boy’s grave. Who knows if Samson will even take the offer?”

“He will. Samson is many things, but he always cared for Maddox. While helping to keep order in Kirkwall, I spotted him helping Maddox to a shelter. No doubt he personally searched him out.” Cullen replied, eyes glued to the coffin.

This plan had to work. It had to.

“Helia, I’m coming for you. Please hang in there.” He whispered, unconsciously squeezing his pendant.

“I’m coming to save you. I promise.”

Chapter Text

Solas waited until he heard the gates rise to signal they should move. Varric led the way so he could open any locked doors. Cullen took the rear of the group, hand gripping the pommel of his sword repeatedly. He focused on the back of Solas’ head to avoid his thoughts. What if she was dead? Or what if they… what if she was an abomination?

He recalled their discussion on what he’d do if such a thing happened. 

“If I was possessed by a demon, would you..”

“Please Helia, don’t ask me this.”

“I think I know the answer.” She quietly said. Cullen sighed and took her hands. 

“I don’t think you do. It's not that simple and I… I would rather not think of it.” He pulled her into a hug, burying his face in her hair. “Once, I would have without question. Now… now I wouldn’t know what to do.”

Back then, he was able to assume it would never happen. Now, now he had to face the very real possibility his lover was possessed by a demon and he’d be forced to make a choice. And Cullen didn’t think he could take her life. He couldn’t even imagine hurting her on accident! 

Varric stopped and was picking a lock to an exit. Solas was giving him light with a small flame in his hand, staff in the other. “We’re in.” Varric whispered as the door opened. They appeared to be in a storage room. Looking around, the only sound was their own footsteps and the occasional rat scurrying by. Once they entered the hallway, it was clear most of the Red Templars had fallen for their plan. Solas pulled out the map Cassandra had made them from what she remembered of the fortress. “The dungeons are this way.” He pointed into the darkness ahead before heading off in that direction. 

Corix grinned as his experiment began. The concept of using magic to control others wasn’t a new concept, but for the longest time it was just that- a concept. His studies had brought him to the conclusion that if you could use blood in rituals or spells, why couldn’t you use the blood while it was still in someone? His experiments on animals had succeeded, and now with the Elder One’s blessing he would get to test it on a person sized test subject. Not that an elf was even close to being a human- after all, they were beneath even slaves. 

The Dalish Mage known as Helia was screaming in agony as the spell began to force her limbs to twist and her blood likely boiled slightly. It was a side effect of the spell- one that if the spell wasn’t correctly done would kill the test subject. But Corix had developed this spell himself and practiced it until it was perfect. The other Venatori would need much practice, but they had enough slaves and prisoners for that. 

Her struggling ceased, the woman’s head hanging and heavy panting coming from her. Corix lifted his hand and grinned as her arm did the same to her horror. “W..What have… Why can’t I control my  body?!” She cried, pleasing the other mages. “It worked. It worked! To use blood magic on blood still inside someone!” One exclaimed. Another congratulated Corix, stating the Elder One most certainly favored him. “To think, we can use it to open Rifts ourselves!” Yet another added.

A Shadow appeared behind Corix and whispered something to him. A wicked grin spread across his face as he realized they could see just how much control it gave him. “It seems we have the perfect opportunity to see this control in action.”

Solas wasn’t a fan of the silence. There was no way all the Templars had gone up to the courtyard. Some had to be guarding the prison cells. 

His question was answered as a fireball just barely missed his head. “Venatori!” He yelled back to Varric and Cullen, summoning a barrier to block a bolt of lightning. Cullen rushed past him, only to stop and let out a panicked gasp as their attacker came into view. 

“H-Helia?! What are you doing?!”

She was silent, but one look at her eyes showed the pure terror she was feeling. Her staff came swinging towards Cullen, only for him to block it with his shield. Solas was trying to comprehend just what was going on when laughter echoed around them. “Oh well this is a surprise! I only just sent word to Samson that we have intruders and who do I find but the Commander of Inquisition forces himself! Bringing with him two more test subjects! This day keeps getting better!” A man’s voice said, excitement evident in his words. “The Inquisitor, striking down her own allies, what a lovely tragedy!”

Solas watched as Helia was once again able to control her mouth as tears streamed down her cheeks. Her vallaslin, normally a bluish color, had turned red, and once again he wished to erase it from her, this time to prevent yet another part of her body from being corrupted by blood magic. 

“Please… run!” She screamed, sending out a bolt of Chain Lightning. The trio cried out in pain as their muscles contracted from the sudden surge of electricity.

Cullen almost wished she was possessed. At least with possession, the host was unable to witness what was happening. Helia, however, was trapped inside her mind while her body acted on someone else’s command. She again swung at him, only missing his skull because he ducked. “Helia I don’t want to fight you. I know you can fight this!” He begged, trying his best to keep calm as panic started to rise in him. 

“Cullen… my blood… it feels like it’s on fire…” Helia managed out, her voice laced with agony. The Venatori controlling her laughed as she suddenly fled into the darkness once more. “It appears we’ve been requested in the courtyard. Samson is no doubt waiting for you, so please, allow us to escort you there.”

A Red Templar Shadow appeared in front of them, waiting for them to follow. “Uh, is it just me or are we screwed?” Varric asked as they followed the monster before them. Solas shrugged in response. Cullen remained silent, praying to the Maker that they would get Helia out safely. 

Standing in the center of the courtyard was Samson, Corix and Helia at his side. Cullen immediately made eye contact with her, wanting nothing more than to take her away from here. Bring her far away from here, from Corypheus, the Inquisition, Orlais, all of it- a place they could both be happy and be free of the burdens they carried. 

“Cullen! It’s so good to finally see you!” Samson grinned. Inquisition forces and Red Templars stood at opposite sides of the courtyard, waiting to see what their generals would do. Cullen glared at his former friend. “Samson. I will be leaving here with the Inquisitor and my men.”

“Oh? Making demands in my home? That’s bold of you. But seeing as you are an old friend, and you did give Maddox a proper burial and were willing to allow me to bury him where he would have wished, I’m open to making a deal.”

“What is it.” Cullen demanded. Solas grabbed his arm, stunned he would even attempt to negotiate. He shook the elf off, staring straight ahead.

“Simple. A duel. If you win, I’ll let you and your precious Inquisitor return home. I win, you have to join us. Your men will be released regardless of the outcome, but you and the Herald will be staying if you lose.”

“What?! Samson my experiment isn’t up for trade!” Corix snapped. Helia simply stood there, her eyes begging Cullen to just go. He couldn’t. He had to at least try.

“Deal.”

The two men stopped arguing and looked at him in surprise. Apparently neither had expected him to agree. “On one condition- the Inquisitor is released of that spell and Solas may check her over to make sure she is alright.” Cullen requested. Samson hummed in consideration before agreeing. Corix grumbled and flicked his wrist at the woman and suddenly, she fell to the ground like a ragdoll. Solas rushed forward to her side, checking her pulse while cradling her head in his lap. He looked up at Cullen and nodded. She was alive. 

“Let the duel commence!” The addicted Templar declared, drawing his sword. Cullen was surprised to see it was Certainty, Meredith’s blade. He could have sworn the sword had disintegrated in Kirkwall. Yet, here it was, the red lyrium greatsword completely intact. 

Samson charged at Cullen, their swords meeting with a clang. The battle had begun.

It was strange. Helia was floating in nothingness, the only light coming from in front of her. She squinted and moved her arms so she could move closer to it. The light began to take the form of a pure white halla, staring at her like it was waiting for her. Her body ached and she wanted to close her eyes and let darkness take her, but the halla started to walk towards her. It nudged her gently and stared at her with soft golden eyes. 

Gold eyes… Cullen has gold eyes. She couldn’t leave him yet. Not like this. She finally was able to put her legs down and walk, leaning against the halla as they approached the light, approached reality.

Cullen panted as he stood above Samson, the tip of his sword pressing against his throat. “I win. Now let us go. Next time, I won’t be so merciful.” He growled, pressing down slightly. Samson grunted, waving his hand. Several Templars moved away from the exit. Cullen lifted his sword and sheathed it before running to Helia’s side. She was unconscious, and as he took in her injuries it was a miracle he didn’t kill anyone. Solas was healing a gash on her forehead, but the cuts, bruises, and black eye were fresher.  He removed his cape and wrapped it around her before picking her up gently. He knew she always felt safer when it was around her. As she put it, it was like he was holding her in his arms. Her head lolled and he moved her position in his arms so it was against his chest. 

“Let’s go home.” He whispered to her, only looking up to glare at the Venatori who had done this to her. Corix stumbled back before fleeing into the fortress. He was lucky this time. If Cullen ever met the bastard again, nothing would stop him from tearing him limb from limb. 

Varric observed Cullen and Helia from his horse. The woman was still asleep in the Commander’s arms, while Cullen was riding in a wagon in hopes maybe he’d sleep. The dwarf knew such a hope was foolish; Curly didn’t understand the concept of rest. 

He thought of the fairytales where the knight would rescue the princess and chuckled. These two had managed to subvert that trope and also confirm it. The knight had needed his True Love to save him, and vice versa. He wondered when True Love’s First Kiss would occur. Sometimes, he felt like Dorian was right and they were right out of fairytales. He wondered when the wizard would come and fight the knight and shook his head. Now he was being ridiculous. 

How ironic that the wizard in this tale was riding next to him, having decided this incident was all Cullen’s fault.

Chapter Text

It had been days since they had returned to Skyhold and Helia still hadn’t regained complete consciousness. She drifted in and out, often delirious from the fever she had. Solas was worried for her, everyone was. The fever hadn’t once broken and from what Dorian had been able to gather, the spell was never meant to break until the victim died. Her body was trying to regain control of itself. 

Solas had stayed by her side, trying to help cool her body with frost magic. He refused to leave when Cullen came to see her. Despite the man wanting to stay with her, there wasn’t much he could do to help. He couldn’t cool her body or reach through to her in the Fade. Personally, Solas blamed him for this. Had he stayed away from Helia, she wouldn’t have been targeted by Samson. Granted, the Venatori likely would have still attacked, but chances were low that Samson would have gotten personally involved.

Stroking her cheek, he let out a sigh. He knew his decision had been made back at the fortress. When this was all over, he was leaving. But he would come back for her when he gained more strength. He knew he was opening himself up to Desire demons, but Solas was stronger than them. The Dread Wolf would rise and at his side, his chosen champion. After all, the orb should have killed the person who held it. Instead, Helia not only walked through the Fade physically, but survived . He wasn’t strong enough to protect her yet. When he was, he would be taking her far away from all of this.

Solas would make sure he was strong enough to protect her when he did. Protect her from everything. Templars, Venatori, Darkspawn, Demons- they wouldn’t be able to harm her. The Evanuris, the Inquisition, Cullen- none would take her away from him. 

Viv was reading a book when Helia finally woke up. She had replaced Solas after he nearly passed out from exhaustion. She hadn’t expected her friend to wake up under her watch, but immediately felt motherly instincts kick in as the small woman attempted to get up. 

“My dear, you’ve been in and out of consciousness for almost a week. If you think you’re standing up, you must be out of your mind.”

“But… I… Cullen..”

“I’ll get the Commander. You, however, will be staying in bed.” Vivienne ordered, fixing the blanket and standing. Helia nodded weakly, her eyes following the woman as she descended the stairs. A few minutes later Cullen was rushing up the stairs, stopping at the top. Helia weakly smiled and waved at him, her arms bandaged up to her hands. Cullen hurried to her side, relief washing over him at the same time as guilt. 

“Helia I… I’m just happy you’re alright. This will never happen again.”

“Cullen… I can tell you’re afraid of me. I don’t blame you.” She whispered, looking at his shaking hands. He shook his head, sitting down in Viv’s abandoned seat. “I’m afraid of what was done to you, not you. That the spell they used on you would kill you. I was scared I lost you.” He took her hands and looked at her. “I was terrified that I’d lost the first good thing I’d come across in more than a decade.”

She was silent. Cullen leaned close and kissed her forehead, smiling as her blue eyes met his gold. “I wish you hadn’t been forced to endure blood magic. I know how that affects a person.” He whispered. She scooted over and he sat down on the bed next to her. 

“C-Can we change the subject? Please Cullen…” 

“Of course.” She leaned against his shoulder, and he couldn’t help but feel like she had somehow gotten smaller. More fragile. 

Samson better hope he doesn’t encounter Cullen again. And that mage-

“How was your trip?” Helia asked, drawing him from his thoughts. “It went well. Hawke tried to climb a tree to get to the moon and ended up falling onto Alistair.” 

She let out a laugh as she imagined the sight. “We stopped at an Elven ruin for the night. Solas says it must have been to Ghilan'nain.” He started to describe the ruins, Helia’s eyes wide in wonder. 

“It was almost completely intact?! I thought after the Exalted March most shrines had been destroyed!” 

“This one was rather hidden, so chances are that’s how it survived. Either that or because it seemed to serve as a waypoint and rest stop it was left alone..” He replied, thinking about the dream he had there. Should he tell her? 

No. Not right now. She already had a lot on her plate and had just gone through so much trauma that hearing Fen’Harel had returned would break her. He wasn’t even sure if the dream was real or not, but then again his pendant had a different feel to it. An aura very similar to the woman he met and warned him of the coming dangers. 

And she called him a Child of the Avvar. No one knew about his heritage, that his grandfather had left his people to be with his grandmother. There was no need to share it. Maker, he hadn’t thought of such a thing in a while. Just what was that woman? Was it truly Ghilan'nain? 

“Cullen? I’m sleepy… Will you stay with me?” 

He chuckled and nodded. “Of course.” He laid down on top of the covers next to her, holding her close to him as she drifted off to sleep. “My knight in shining armor…” She mumbled. Cullen blushed and smiled, kissing the top of her head.

She had been his knight at Adamant. Now, it was his turn to be hers.

The group had taken to staying with Helia on shifts. She refused to be alone after her imprisonment, and when possible had taken to following Cullen like a baby bird following its mother. It was adorable in Cullen’s opinion. Cassandra and Hawke did as well, much to his dismay.

“She reminds me of a baby duck. I had no idea you were her mother.”

“Only you would somehow end up with a mage as your shadow!”

Why were these people his friends? He really had to reconsider why he tolerated Hawke. Cassandra, Cassandra rarely joked around like this so he didn’t mind. If it got her to relax, so be it.

Now, as they planned their attack on the Arbor Wilds, Cullen was finishing up a meeting with his men. “Now, I need reports on-...on supply lines… you’re dismissed.” He finished, hesitating when he realized Helia had entered his office. She had been spending the day with Varric, so her presence surprised him. Closing the door behind the last soldier, he let out a sigh. 

“Tired?” She asked, and he looked up at her with a tired smile. “I shouldn’t complain.” He headed back to his desk, Helia right behind him. “This war… it won’t last forever. When it started, I hadn’t thought much of the future. I only focused on our survival. But… it's different now.”

“What do you mean?”

“I find myself wondering what will happen after. When this is over, I… I won’t want to move on. From you. But I don’t know what you- that is, if you, uh, um…”

She smiled and placed a hand on his cheek. “Cullen. Is that even a question?”

He smiled as they two leaned in for a kiss. “I suppose not. I-”

A crash interrupted him. A bottle had tumbled from his desk, and Helia looked guilty and apologetic. He smiled and shook his head, shoving everything off his desk as they climbed onto it.

Darkness. He was surrounded by darkness. Cullen could hear screaming all around him, and he started to panic. No. Nononono this can’t be happening. No, no-

“NO!” He cried out, startling Helia who was sitting on the edge of his bed. She was getting dressed, but stopped to see if he was alright. “I didn’t mean to worry you.” He said, moving some hair from her face. Cullen recalled just how they ended up in his bed in the first place. Her skin was marred by battle scars, and he had discovered her vallaslin stretched to her back, graceful vines that made up a halla. She had seen his scars, and had traced each one with her fingers before kissing each one, like he had for her once. 

“You know, you can let me worry about you a little bit.” She whispered, smiling at him. “You’re right. Like you always are.”

“I’m not always right!”

“You are in my mind… I’ve never had anything like this before.” He whispered back, their foreheads meeting. “I love you so much, Cullen. More than there are stars in the sky.”

“I love you too, my sun.” 

Their lips met and when she left, all Cullen could do was lay there and smile with pure love.

Chapter Text

The attack on the Arbor Wilds was a chaotic mess. The inclusion of mysterious elven warriors had complicated things, but Cullen didn’t have time to think about it. He was more focused on clearing a path to the temple. Helia was right behind him, summoning barriers around their forces and throwing fireballs at attackers.

As they approached the entrance, Inquisition soldiers attacked them. The jerky, forced movements paired with the terror on their faces made it clear that the strange blood magic was at play here. Dorian moved closer to Helia as protection, nodding to Cullen that he got her. She was trembling, knuckles white as she gripped her staff to her chest. The moment she saw their men suffer what she did, Inquisitor Lavellan was gone and Helia was in her place, her confidence replaced with fear. 

Fear that she would lose control of her body, fear she would strike her friends and allies down, fear that she would fail everyone. 

Dorian shielded her from the sight of Cullen and Cassandra having no choice but to cut their allies down. With no idea where the Venatori were hiding, the only option was to kill the attacking soldiers in order to free them from their torment. Sera was even hesitating to attack them. They were scared and forced to attack their allies against their will. 

The group made it inside the temple just to see Samson and Corix jump down a large crack in the floor. Morrigan said they should go through the trials instead of following them, much to Cullen’s dismay.

“This place deserves respect!” Morrigan argued.

“We don’t have time for that!”

Solas shot him a dirty look. “We already are trespassing. The least we can do is respect the trials to get to the Well of Sorrows.” He snapped.

Helia was silent, taking everyone’s opinions into consideration. “...We do the trials. I think those elves are attacking because we are trespassing, so maybe if we respect this place they’ll ally with us.” She said, heading further inside. Cullen sighed and followed her despite his wish to follow Samson, but he respected her choice.  

Watching her perform the trials, learning about the Elven Sentinels, meeting Abelas- he couldn’t help but feel amazed by the ancient elves. He understood how Helia must feel wanting to know everything about human culture- it was so foreign but so beautiful, so old yet so new. With every step he took he felt like he was violating this place. He had no right to be here- no one but Helia and Solas did. They were the only ones who worshiped- or in Solas’ case, respected- the Evanuris. 

As they entered the sanctum where the Well of Sorrows lay, Cullen grabbed his sword. Standing before them was Samson and Corix, who turned to look at the group. 

“Inquisitor! You finally caught up with us! We were just dealing with these annoying pests so I can perform my duty as the Vessel.” Samson said, grinning. Corix seemed pleased to see her, as he was practically vibrating from excitement. “She’s alive! This means my spell can be used and revoked without the victim dying! I wonder if it will work again!”

Cullen moved in front of Helia, shielding her from his gaze. He refused to allow her to go through that again. “Last I checked, she can fight her own battles, Rutherford. But I’m open for round two of our duel.” Samson said.

Cullen rolled his eyes. “So I can beat you again? Like I told you, next time we fight there will be no mercy.”

“Not this time. I have a duty to fulfill and I don’t plan on disappointing Corypheus.”

Solas stepped forward. “What exactly do you mean? That you are the Vessel?”

As Samson started to explain, he saw Cullen glare down the mage standing at Samson’s side. Solas wanted nothing more but to destroy Corix, but he didn’t mind if Cullen killed him. As long as he didn’t leave here alive, Solas didn’t care who killed him or how. As the two former Templars lunged at one another, as Helia used the rune Dagna developed to disable Samson’s armor, Solas remained focused on Corix. He watched as the bastard began to mouth something and raise his hand towards the group. 

Solas decided he would deal with the man personally. Using his own magic, he twisted the Veil so any spell cast towards them bounced back. He hoped no one saw his smile as Corix started to scream and his limbs twisted unnaturally. He knew that as Corix had cast the spell for him to control someone, the only one able to stop it was him. He was going to enjoy the Venatori’s slow, painful death. 

Cullen, meanwhile, was pushing Samson back, sensing he was getting weaker and weaker. When he finally knocked him to the ground and kicked his sword away, he was prepared to end him. End all the pain and suffering he had put them through. Cullen was only stopped when Helia gently grabbed his arm. 

“Don’t. He wants you to do this. We can take him back to Skyhold and try him.” She said, looking at him. 

“He deserves this!”

“He deserves a trial.”

He looked at her, his gaze softening. She was right. Part of him still saw Samson as his old friend and roommate. Regardless of how much he tried to hate him, he knew the path he took easily could have been Cullen’s. And from the reports he’d read, Samson did care for his men even though he willingly infected them with red lyrium. Allowing Templars to be given as much pain relief as they needed while going through the process of becoming a Red Templar, making sure Maddox was alright and safe, refusing to go back on a deal despite having an advantage- all things that pointed to Samson still harboring some good in him. 

Corix was on the ground,  a twitching, moaning mess. Helia personally put him out of his misery. “No one deserves to suffer like that. Not even him.” Sh whispered, turning to look at Abelas and Morrigan. “Abelas, please don’t destroy the Well. If anything, the knowledge it contains deserves to be shared with Our People. If possible we will return its power to this place.”

The older elf stared at her in consideration. “Do you understand the price of drinking from the Well is that you will be at the will of Mythal?” He asked. Morrigan scoffed, shaking her head. “The will of a long gone goddess? It’s a price that will never come to be-”

“Murdered.”

She stopped and looked at him. Helia stepped forward, confused by his statement. “What?”

“Mythal was murdered. She was not sealed away with the other Evanuris. We do not know who killed her, but she was dead before Fen’Harel sealed them away.” He explained. Solas didn’t appear shocked to Cullen’s surprise. While he never seemed to like the other Elven gods, he did seem to like Mythal and respected her the most. Why wasn’t he shocked that the goddess was murdered?

“I will allow you to drink from the Well. On the condition you preserve this place.” Abelas said. Helia nodded, then turned to the group. “I’ll drink it. I have no qualms with paying the price and I can use it the best.” Morrigan said. Cullen didn’t like her or necessarily trust her with the well’s knowledge, but it was better her than Helia or Solas. Well, better than Helia needing to pay the price. Solas straight out refused when asked. 

The Inquisitor frowned and shook her head. “No. I will. This is the knowledge of my People, and this knowledge is also our history. We’ve already lost so much of it that I cannot let the chance to help preserve and share this knowledge go to someone who would keep it to herself.” She replied, her gaze hardening as Morrigan went to protest. 

“Morrigan. I respect you. But you already disrespected Mythal by brushing off her price as silly. I cannot and will not allow you to disrespect her more.” She coldly stated, causing the other Mage to stand down. As she approached the Well, Solas appeared ready to stop her. His disapproval again confused Cullen- shouldn’t he be happy their history was going to a fellow elf? Or maybe he was worried about the consequences- he knew he was. What if Helia lost herself?

The next moments were a blur. Helia drinking from the Well, Abelas leaving, a geyser of water shooting into the sky, Corypheus entering and seeing once again Helia had thwarted him. The group rushed through the eluvian, Helia coming through last just as the darkspawn touched the mirror and shattered it. Landing on the floor of the room, Cullen groaned and sat up. Helia was leaning against a crate holding her head. “Amazing… please, one at a time…” She whispered, smiling. He stood and went to her side, worried about what had happened. She looked up at him and grinned. “So many voices and so much knowledge… It’s beautiful, if not a little strange to have my ancestors speak to me. But they’ve quieted down for now.”

He nodded, still unsure but simply happy she was alright.

Chapter Text

After the battle in the Arbor Wilds, Cullen wasn’t sure what to think. Helia had gone on a small trip to the Wilds in order to receive knowledge from her ancestors in a spot sacred to Mythal. Knowing how she was, she would get sidetracked and end up on yet another adventure. 

He chuckled at the thought. It seemed that every time she left Skyhold for something, her attention would end up somewhere else, and the next thing they knew she was away for nearly two months. She’d return with gifts for her friends, often things she found or purchased. 

This included toys for their four Mabari. Speaking of them, currently Riki, the eldest of the puppies, was chewing on an old boot a scout gave him. Cullen swore that the puppies were spoiled between Helia and his men. And Master Dennet, seeing as Chester practically lived in the stables. 

It wasn’t unusual for her to bring him gifts. Actually, she almost always did. He wasn’t used to it, but he didn’t complain. Her gifts were usually useful, like a new whetstone or a set of quills. When she traveled to Fereldan, she would return with things from his homeland- often, baked goods. 

“Cullen I got you a book on Fereldan history I think you’d like! I also brought you a fruit pie!”

The fact she put so much thought into what she brought him was touching. While a Templar, the idea of receiving a gift had become foreign to him, and for someone to go out of their way to give him something- it was surprising and delightful. He often wished he was able to give her something in return. But according to Helia, seeing him smile and relax was all she needed.

“The only gift I want in return is for you to relax with me! And if that’s not enough, read to me. Please? I want to know about your people.”

So, Cullen gave her gifts in the form of actions. He set up picnics and would train with her, read with or to her, Maker he even would dance with her despite his inability to dance. All to see her smile. 

He thought of their moonlight waltzes. They reminded him of their first dance at the Winter Palace, and every time he danced with her she was just as beautiful as she was then, if not more. Sometimes they didn’t even dance. They would simply lay on the ground and stargaze, Helia teaching him about Dalish constellations and Cullen teaching her about constellations he knew of.  

 They did try to keep these moments secret- they hoped to announce their relationship after Corypheus was dealt with- but the inhabitants of Skyhold all knew of the two. It was a known secret of the castle- everyone was in silent agreement to not spread it outside or to those outside the Inquisition visiting Skyhold. 

Which meant that both Cullan and Helia received marriage proposals. Mainly from Orlais. Gaspard was at the top of that list, sending Helia letters in an attempt to woo her or at least to unite in a political marriage. Cullen wanted nothing more than to confront the Grand Duke and make it clear he knew that man was a cruel bastard and he would never have her. It was clear to him that Gaspard simply wanted to use Helia and the Inquisition to overthrow his cousin, and by marrying the Inquisitor he would keep them on a short leash. 

Cullen himself had received several proposals. They came from all over- Olrais, Fereldan, The Free Marches- one even came from Tevintar. He burned all of them. He had no plans on marrying anyone but Helia, and that was only if she wished to marry. If not, he’d stay by her side until the end of their lives. She was the only person he would ever love, and he wasn’t sure he even deserved her. She didn’t deserve him.

Helia deserved someone better. She had the possibility of anyone she desired, and yet she picked him. Why, he would never know, but she did. She wanted nothing more than to stand by his side, even if it went against her people’s traditions. She was willing to leave everything she knew behind to stay with him, to continue to bring light and joy into his life. Her presence chased away all of his nightmares and allowed him to relax. Her voice always soothed him and her bubbly, curious personality never ceased to make him smile. 

Meanwhile, Cullen noticed Solas had become even more cold towards him. He still had no clue what he did to upset the elf, but he had suspicions it had to do with Samson.

He was half right.

When Solas stormed into his office and locked the door behind him, Cullen half expected he was going to stab him. “What were you thinking, coming with us to save Helia?!” Solas snapped, rage radiating off him.

“Excuse me? Why wouldn’t I go?! She was abducted because of me! I refused to let her suffer because of Samson’s obsession with me!” Cullen shot back. The Mage slammed his hands down on the desk separating the two. 

“Do you realize that is what Samson wanted?! He wanted you to come! Have you considered if we failed what they would do to you?! You’d become a Red Templar! They’d likely force you to kill Helia!”

Cullen fell silent. She had told him about such nightmares before. She was less concerned with dying but was upset that she failed him. That he had been infected with red lyrium and forced to kill her. That was what she was really scared of- that he would be forced to become the very thing he hated and forced to take the very thing he had fought so hard to become sober from. 

“She was terrified of losing you! Why she thinks so highly of a fool I will never know.” Solas sneered, turning to leave.

“I don’t know myself. All I know is I love her more than life itself.” The man whispered. Solas stopped, considering his words before leaving.

Cullen would protect his sun from those who wish her harm and would stand by her side for as long as she’d let him. He knew she could handle herself, so he’d ask to join her on her adventures once this was all over so he could fight by her side.

Chapter Text

To say Solas was upset with Helia’s decision to drink from the Well of Sorrows was an understatement. He was pissed.

“Do you realize you are at the whim of a god now?! Do you know just how dangerous that is?!” He growled, pacing around his study. Helia was standing by his desk, avoiding his gaze. She looked like a child being scolded for stealing a cookie from the cookie jar instead of the leader of an Inquisition. “I know, but now we know how to defeat Corypheus-”

“Yes, but the fact Mythal is still alive and you are now in debt to her is a problem! Such beings don’t care about us!”

“They do too! Or at least they did when we could hear them!” Helia snapped back. It was moments like this that Solas wished he could tell her the truth. That the Evanuris were not caring, helpful beings but selfish, power hungry, and insane. Once again he was reminded of her innocence towards the world. If the Dalish weren’t so full of themselves and refused to learn much about the rest of the world, this wouldn’t have happened. She naively drank from the Well, and yet with all that knowledge still didn’t see the truth. 

He was convinced that she was either so naive she refused to believe the truth, or she truly didn’t know. Perhaps the Well sensed that revealing the truth would destroy her. Her innocence was the only reason he hadn’t told her everything.

He wished that he could proceed with his plans while preserving her innocence. But he knew she’d try to stop him if she knew the truth. He couldn’t have her do that. What he was going to do was for the good of everyone. It would redeem him for his past mistakes and would free Helia from this Tranquil-like state all Mages lived in since the Veil was created. 

Granted, the removal of the Veil would impact those who had worked to move away from the Fade- specifically, Templars and Seekers. Those who gained abilities by going in the exact opposite of the Fade or whose abilities are meant to disrupt the connection to the Fade would likely die from the sudden influx of magical energy surging through them more than those who simply couldn’t use magic. The thought of losing Cassandra saddened him, but she was simply a life lost for the greater good. Cullen, having been off lyrium and therefore losing his abilities granted by it, might survive. But Solas would make certain that Helia wouldn’t know- the human would likely be dead or taken by the demons that circled him in his sleep. It would be a quick end if he simply died from magical overload. 

It was a death Solas honestly hoped for. While he despised Cullen, after learning that he was holding off demons and suffered from so much trauma because of the Fade he didn’t wish for him to suffer from a lack of a barrier between this world and the Fade. He still respected him that much. If it came down to it, Solas would give him a quick and merciful end. 

If he tried to come between him and his plans or Helia, then he’d make sure the Templar would suffer. Solas would need to focus on other matters once the Veil falls, and if Cullen tries to stop him he won’t hesitate to strike him down.

“Solas? I… I’m sorry. I should’ve thought about it more. But I want to be able to preserve and share that place with everyone. To know what the truth of Our People’s history is. I don’t want it to… to die. We’ve already lost so much and I want to help reestablish our homeland. This time, in a way that elves, dwarves, and humans can live together in peace.” She apologized. His gaze softened and he sighed.

“It’s alright. I shouldn’t have taken my frustration out on you.” He gave her a weak smile. “I am simply worried about you. Mythal can control you to do anything she wishes. The Elven Gods are not to be trusted so completely. They have their own desires and vices. You are now her pawn.” In a rare act on his part, he hugged her. 

Helia hesitated for a moment before hugging back. She was a bit shocked he was showing affection of any kind- normally, the only thing he would do was smile at someone to show he cared. Solas often avoided physical contact and never initiated contact.

“Solas? A-Are you okay?” She squeaked.

“Yes. I apologize. I… like I said, I’m worried about you.” He let go and took a step back. Part of him wanted to hold her longer. Her skin was so soft, and she smelled of strawberries and elfroot. “Uh, this may be impolite, but why do you smell like elfroot?”

She blinked before smiling and shaking her head. “That, my Fade-traveling friend, is a secret! But I’ll let you know as long as you don’t share it. And pay for the drinking chocolate when we go to Val Royeaux.” She offered. He nodded, and she leaned in close to him. 

“It’s a skin lotion I made. The elfroot helps when I have aches and pains. It also makes my skin super duper soft!”

She grinned and pulled away, heading upstairs to Dorian. Solas simply stood there, yet again amazed by her strangeness. Why did she not want to share that? It was completely normal for elfroot to be used like that. Then again, knowing Helia and her odd obsession with the plant, it was probably her own recipe.

Dorian and Bull were enjoying some time together when Cole had interrupted them. Luckily they weren’t naked yet and the rope wasn’t out yet, but it was still surprising for the boy to barge in like he did. “Cole? What’s wrong?” Dorian asked, somewhat irritated. Didn’t Varric teach him to knock?

“Solas. Love and lust, protect her and her innocence. The man, not right and will die. Either by my hand or not.” Cole said, pacing back and forth. Iron Bull and Dorian looked at each other in confusion. Was he… was he saying this was from Solas?

“Kid, you talking about Solas? Who is he talking about?” Bull questioned. Cole simply nodded in response. “These thoughts and feelings have been like this for a while. I don’t like it.” He stated, finally stopping to look at them. 

“Cole, are you saying he’s… jealous? Of Helia and Cullen?” Dorian asked, having a feeling that was it. He had noticed how Solas looked at the two- affection and care for Helia, pure jealousy and distaste for Cullen. The boy nodded again, confirming his suspicions. 

“He looks at Helia, purity, bright, good, must protect. He looks at Cullen, Templar, bad, controlling, doesn’t deserve her. I don’t like it! I came to you because you two feel like Helia and Cullen!”

“Uh, what?” Bull was still confused. 

“You look at each other and compassion, love, protection. So do they.”

The Mage let out a sigh of relief. Good. He didn’t pick up on-

“Lust, a strong body. Horns, not two but-” 

“COLE!!!!”

Chapter Text

Cullen stood by Helia’s side as Samson was brought before the Inquisitor for judgement. His former friend was dragged before them, and Cullen’s heart fell. His rival seemed smaller, gaunt, his eyes sunken in their sockets. His eyes were bloodshot, and it was honestly a surprise he was even alive. It was clear that the red lyrium had taken its toll. As he read out the charges, he tried to squash the feeling of pity rising in his throat.

“Knight-Templar Raleigh Samson, general to Corypheus and traitor to the Order. His hands can barely contain the blood split because of him.” He stated, glaring at Samson.

“I simply gave my men something to live for after the Chantry tossed us aside.” Samson spat. Helia was silent as Cullen continued. “Kirkwall, Orlais, Ferelden- so many want his head, but he’s too valuable to simply kill.” 

“And they all decided to allow us to judge him?” The Inquisitor asked, glancing at her Commander. He gave a nod in response. “I see. Samson. Your men were extremely loyal to you. Maddox… Maddox ended his own life for you. Despite giving the order for them to consume red lyrium, you gave permission for them to receive as much pain relief as possible. That shows you still have empathy and do care for others.” Helia stated, leaning forward in her throne. 

“My men were simply following my orders. It's all any of us have ever known. At least this gave them purpose after the Chantry threw us away! Your Commander knows that fact very well- once you are all used up, you get kicked to the streets with no way to access the very thing they made you addicted to. I gave them hope that they could die in order to make things better!”

“You gave them a death sentence by feeding them red lyrium!” Cullen shot back. Anger was threatening to boil over in him. Make things better?! By destroying the world?! “At least we were freed from the Chantry’s leash! And besides, your prophet here isn’t a looker, so there isn’t even that going for it. And now, she’s essentially possessed by spirits!”

Helia raised her hand to stop Cullen from rushing forward. This man, who had tormented them, killed hundreds, caused the suffering of even more, deserved death. And yet, Lavellan was holding him from strangling him. 

“Samson. I can tell your time is short.” She said softly, standing up. “Yeah, well I’ll tell you what I know. He’d kill me if I went back now.” Samson grumbled, eyeing her as she approached him. “Then you will work for the Inquisition until the end of your days. You will tell us what you know, and in exchange we will give you the care you need to at least pass on comfortably. Cullen will be your handler.” 

She was in front of him now, hands clasped behind her back. “We will bring Maddox back to Skyhold so he is buried close by. It is clear you two were friends, and he doesn’t deserve to rest in a place far away from the only person one could consider his family.” She proposed. Samson actually looked like he was surprised by her decision. After all, he didn’t deserve mercy; he’d caused so much pain to so many. He’d kidnapped and tortured her, and yet… she was granting him mercy? 

“Are you stupid or something? After everything I put you through-”

“Oh trust me, I wouldn’t mind shoving my hand right through you and tossing you into a Fade Rift. But, there is still good in you, Samson. I cannot put someone to death or torture who can do something positive. So don’t screw this up or I will let Cullen do what he wants your punishment to be.” She coldly replied. 

As soon as Samson was taken away, she had taken Cullen’s hand and led him to her quarters. The mask fell and she was back to being Helia once more, worry crossing her face. “Was this the right decision? Should I have given him to Kirkwall? Or just killed him? Creators I feel like I made a mistake-”

“Helia.” He gently grabbed her shoulders, looking at her. “This punishment is fine. He won’t live much longer anyways, so imprisonment is useless and he wants to die, so execution wouldn’t feel like we’re getting any justice. And… I don’t know if he should die by execution. Letting him live while red lyrium eats away at him is torture in itself. But killing him seems too easy. Don’t let this eat away at you.” 

She sniffled and nodded. In that moment, Cullen was again amazed by how Helia Lavellan and Inquisitor Lavellan were the same person. The Inquisitor was confident, cold yet merciful, yet warm and protective at the same time. Helia was curious, emotional, and just as warm and protective. At times he wondered if she was Andraste reborn; other times he thought she was the Elven goddess of justice Mythal having taken mortal form. She was a beacon of justice and love, and she attracted so many looking for someone to help them. Care for them. Give them and their loved ones justice.

What all those people seemed to forget was that Helia was mortal. They didn’t see her when she was badly injured, or when she scratched her arms raw from the anxiety of knowing she was the only person who could heal the tears in the Veil. The sleepless nights when she kept reliving being controlled by blood magic, the haunting look in her eyes when she returned from some missions. 

That was how Cullen found himself in the chapel, praying before a statue of Andraste. Praying for the souls of the lost, and for those he didn’t wish to lose.

“Though all before me is shadow,

Yet shall the Maker be my guide.

I shall not be left to wander the drifting roads of the Beyond.

For there is no darkness in the Maker's Light

And nothing that He has wrought shall be lost.” 

“A prayer for the lost?”

He opened his eyes and stood, turning to see Helia enter. “And for those I’m afraid to lose.” He replied, letting out a sigh. She walked over and placed a hand on his shoulder. “We are so close to the end. Corypheus will throw everything at you.” Pulling Helia into a hug, he drew a shaky breath. “When the time comes, you will be thrown into his path again… Andraste preserve me, I must send you to him.” He whispered, holding her tightly. She buried her face in his furs, and he continued to hold her in his arms. He wished they could stay like this forever.

“Whatever happens, you will come back.”

“I will. I promise you.” She whispered in response.

“The thought of losing you… I can’t…”

“Cullen, I’m coming back after defeating Corypheus. We still have to go on adventures together, remember?” She looked up at him and gave a small smile. He chuckled and nodded. Of course she’d stay optimistic. 

“I remember. Do you mind if… if we stay like this for a little longer?” He asked, not wanting to let her go. Right now, if he closed his eyes, he could pretend they were somewhere else and she wasn’t about to head into danger against a darkspawn magister. She simply kissed him and nodded.

The moment he dreaded finally came the next day. During a War Meeting, the ground shook and both the sky and the Anchor glowed. Helia had cried out in pain as the sky reopened once more.

“He’s trying to open the Breach…” She managed out. Her advisors shared a look of panic. Their forces hadn’t yet returned from the Arbor Wilds. They had no way to support her in this battle. 

“Our forces haven’t returned yet. We have no way… We have no way to give you backup.” Cullen whispered in horror. This couldn’t be happening. Not now. Not today.

She gave him a reassuring smile before running out of the room, calling for Cassandra and Varric. No doubt Solas was already with Varric as his study was right next to where the dwarf worked on his next book. The four who had set out to seal the Breach would defeat the one who opened it. 

He found himself on the balcony of Helia’s room, staring out at the Breach. He sent a prayer to Andraste to protect her, then gripped his pendant. “ Ghilan'nain, bring her home safely.” He whispered, hoping the Elven goddess who spoke to him once in a dream would accept his plea and guide her back to him.

Chapter Text

Solas stood at Helia’s side as they finally caught up with Corypheus. The magister seemed distraught that he had failed, that his dragon was dead and he wouldn’t be coming back this time. 

The elf smiled slightly as she grabbed Corypheus and opened a Rift inside him, both fulfilling his wish to enter the Fade and killing him at the same time. The orb, his precious orb, was sent up into the Breach by the Inquisitor. Once it returned to earth, a scar remained in the sky while his orb lay in pieces. 

“Solas… I’m so sorry. I know you wanted to save it.” Helia quietly said, picking up the pieces and gently placing them in her bag. “Maybe we can repair it?”

“...No. But it is alright. It is better this way.” He gave her a smile. It could be repaired, but there were other foci he could use. The Veil was weak enough now anyways. He could proceed with his plan soon it appeared.

He didn’t follow her back to the others, knowing it would be too hard to leave. Seeing the friends he made would keep him from carrying out his plans. So, once Helia was distracted, he ran.

The moment Cullen saw Helia enter the gates of Skyhold to a crowd cheering for her, his heart swelled with joy. She honestly seemed surprised by everyone’s reaction to seeing her. People were cheering and thanking her, some falling to their knees and praising her with claims that perhaps Andraste had managed to get the Maker to look down on them through the use of Helia. 

Her eyes met his and she smiled, rushing up the steps before launching herself into his arms. They normally would avoid such displays in public- but in this case, they could make an exception. Her lips met his and he only pulled away when the two ran out of air. Foreheads touching, he stared at her lovingly. She was grinning and whispered, “I came back.”

“I know.”

Helia pulled away to address the crowd, much to his dismay. If he had it his way he’d still be holding her in his arms. “Inquisition! Corypheus has been defeated and the Breach sealed! Know this was all because of you and your efforts, and take some time to celebrate!” She proclaimed, earning more cheering from the crowd. With that, the Inquisitor and her advisors withdrew to the War Room.

Josie was practically vibrating in excitement. “I’ll get to planning the victory party immediately! We’ll need food and music and we need to go over the guest list- Helia you’ll need a dress!”

“Um, Josie, I’m fine without one-”

“Nonsense! Helia, this won’t be the only party. Chances are royalty and nobility across Thedas will be having celebrations and you will be the guest of honor! Of course, we’ll be receiving more requests for aid or alliance-”

“Josephine. Give Helia some time to relax!” Leliana interrupted, smiling as she watched the scene unfold. She would soon be on her way to become Divine and wanted nothing more than to savor every moment with her friends. “Have the party in a week from now. She needs time to relax.” 

Cullen nodded in agreement. Their Ambassador sighed and relented, agreeing to wait until Helia was ready to discuss how to proceed. Helia was happy with this, leaning on Cullen. She clearly was exhausted from the battle and he was surprised she had made it this long. The elf let out a yawn and ended the meeting, promising to meet once she recovered her strength. 

“Dealing with Corypheus and sealing the Breach one last time took a lot out of me. I think the mark drained some of my strength to seal it for good.” 

Cullen had led her to her quarters. Well, their quarters. Helia had asked him prior to the Arbor Wilds if he wanted to move into her room. She slept better when in his arms, and he did as well. And it was nice to wake up to her. 

She removed her armor and changed into pajamas after a quick bath. Currently, Cullen was combing through her hair with his fingers while she sat on the floor by the fireplace, reading the most recent letter from Alistar.

“ ‘Seeing as Corypheus will be dealt with soon, we should meet up and go camping again. This time with Helia- Cullen, you are a lucky man.’ Well, he’s not wrong.”

“I have you in my life. How could I not be?” He said, smiling at her. He truly was lucky. She hummed in response, looking up at him. “Cully Wully? Can we go camping? Pleaseeee?” She asked, giving him puppy dog eyes. He cursed internally at Sera for giving him that nickname. And that when Helia used it, it was adorable. “Of course. But I have a feeling Josie won’t be letting us do so for a month or two. You did just save the world.”

“I just did what anyone would have done. If I didn’t have the Mark, the person who did would seal the Breach.” She replied. “Not necessarily. There are those who would sit back and watch the world be destroyed. Not only did you choose to seal the Breach, you took on the role of Inquisitor. You helped uncover the true murderer of the Divine of a religion that’s not even yours.”

“Sorta not mine? I’m still unsure how I feel about the Maker or the Chantry. Andraste however… She believed that elves were equals. That they deserved at least the same respect as humans. Regardless, I’m just happy becoming the Inquisitor meant meeting you.”  She smiled, before continuing.

“What now? Where do we go from here?”

“I don’t know. All I know is wherever we go, it’s together.” He kissed the top of her head and chuckled as she let out a yawn. Cullen scooped her up in his arms and carried her to their bed, laying down next to her. She snuggled into him, closing her eyes with a smile. He watched her as she fell asleep, the only noises their breathing. He wanted to remember tonight forever. 

From now on, they would adventure together.

Chapter Text

“Ow!” 

The Commander of the Inquisition yelped as the tailor pricked him with a pin. Josephine had decided that he should have a suit to wear to the party Empress Celene was hosting the coming month, much to his dismay. Orelsian parties were not his idea of fun. But it also gave them an opportunity to expose Gaspard and his hunt to the Empress, something he wanted to personally tell her. Lelianna’s spies had alerted Briala and her people of the secret sport chevaliers participated in and already a good chunk of the chevaliers were taken out. It was Gaspard’s turn.

“Alright, Commander. I’ll be back in two weeks for the next fitting! Please, get changed.” 

A moment later Cullen was back into his clothes and free to wander around Skyhold. He had time before his next meeting, and found himself in Solas’ study. He was surprised to find that before his departure the elf had finished his murals. The wall depicted a man wearing the skin of a wolf rising into the air, and to his shock he realized it was a depiction of Fen’Harel. Seeing as the other murals chronicled the Inquisition’s many triumphs, the addition of an event that had yet to occur was unnerving.

He again thought back to the warning Ghilan'nain had given him. She asked him to protect Helia from the Dread Wolf as he wanted to take her away from everyone and everything. Was the mural confirmation that Fen’Harel had returned and was targeting her? But why?

The fact Solas somehow knew about this wasn’t completely surprising- he likely heard about it from spirits while traveling the Fade. What was strange was that he hadn’t mentioned it to anyone. Cullen considered that maybe he hoped to gather more information first? Or was it possible… no. Solas wouldn’t have helped them if he was Fen’Harel. If he truly was a trickster, then why aid those wishing to bring order? 

Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, the former Templar turned away from the wall mural and bumped into a small table. He noticed a notebook fall to the ground and knelt down to pick it up. The book had fallen open to a sketch of Helia, and instantly Cullen felt like he was viewing something private. Solas had likely sketched this and as the notebook appeared to be a journal of some sort, had likely never intended for anyone to see it. He quickly closed the journal and put it back, not wanting to pry into the elf’s personal thoughts. Part of him reasoned it may explain why he hated Cullen so much, but he knew better than to read it. It wasn’t right for him to intrude on the private thoughts and views of someone else. 

Walking up the steps to the library, Cullen found Dorian and Helia chatting. They were discussing the other possible uses of the Anchor. “I could maybe use it as a way to travel in secret! But opening it back up would give me away…” She frowned, clearly deep in thought. Dorian nodded in agreement. “Perhaps we could use it to create mini eluvians. You may be able to access the pockets between our world and the Fade, especially now that you have knowledge from the Well of Sorrows. You said Morrigan calls this pocket dimension the Crossroads?” 

“Yes. It’s beautiful there… so many colors and eluvians!” She replied, swaying back and forth on her heels. “But when I mentioned it to Morrigan, she said she didn’t see many colors. I wonder why.” 

“Perhaps it has to do with your connection to the Fade?” 

Cullen could tell if he didn’t interrupt them, they’d never realize he was there. Clearing his throat, the two Mages jumped and turned to see him. “Ah! Cullen! Sorry about that. Didn’t see you there.” Dorian apologized. Cullen shook his head. 

“It’s fine. I know how you two get when discussing magic. I’m surprised I was even able to get your attention.” He replied. “Anything new regarding that professor in the Basin?” 

“Oh! Yes! He said he thinks he may have a lead on Ameridan! As soon as all the celebrations are done I plan on heading there! Cullen, would you like to come?” Helia asked excitedly. The Commander smiled and nodded, resulting in the tiny elf hugging him and excitedly rambling about how much fun this would be. Her excitement was contagious and personally, he was also excited to travel with her. “I better be included in this trip. I want to learn about this Ameridan fellow.” Dorian added, smiling at the couple. “Of course Dorian! How could I survive without my best friend and local genius!”

“Oh you flatter me! You’re not wrong, but you flatter me.”

She giggled at the Mage’s response, causing Dorian to smirk. As much as they flirted with each other, it was clear they only had platonic feelings for one another. It would be interesting to see them in the field together, but Cullen had a suspicion that he would be teased by his friend. Dorian may love the two of them, but had mentioned how easy it was to tease Cullen. Then again, he could tease the Mage right back seeing as how flustered he got about the Iron Bull. Varric had commented that they were so in love but also were so easily embarrassed. 

No doubt he had added that to his book. 

Tugging on Cullen’s hand, Helia led him away and out of the tower to the secret garden. When they arrived, she let go and fell backwards into the grass. 

“Cullen I don’t want to deal with politics again! Last time I just barely avoided getting murdered, and Florianne was at least obvious! Plus this time there will be leaders from all across Thedas attending! The Archon, the king of Nevarra- people I haven’t even considered meeting! Plus it means more proposals- think we could skip? Wait, then Alistair would have to face them all alone…”

“Josephine would kill us if we tried to miss it. And it is a good excuse to see you shame all those Orlesians with your beauty and wit.” He replied, sitting down next to her. “I’m quite certain even Celene was jealous of your beauty at the peace talks.”

“I’m not that pretty… but it does give me a chance to ask you to dance while dressed as a prince~” She teased. “Give yourself more credit. You are the most beautiful person I’ve ever met, inside and out.” He brushed a strand of hair from her face and smiled down at her. “And if you ask me to, I’ll dance with you there. I believe this time I’m a worthy partner.” She giggled at his words, causing him to pout. “What? It’s the truth!”

“I know. I just wish that instead of all this partying…”

“That your reward would be giving the Dales back to the elves.” Cullen finished. She nodded and let out a sigh. He knew how much regaining the Dales meant for the Dalish- the elves had lost both homelands now, and the second one still existed yet humans controlled it. Helia had mentioned that she envied everyone else in the group as they had somewhere they belonged and came from- she wasn’t even sure where in the Free Marches she was born. Now that Briala was Marquise of the Dales, Helia hoped that progress could be made in returning the region to her people. 

“Mmm. But, an elf ruling over the Dales is a start at least.” She said, sitting up. “Well, I’m off to go suffer the pain of dress fittings. Unless…” She looked at him hopefully. “Oh no. I’m not getting on Josie’s bad side.” He replied, resulting in a groan from the Inquisitor. He watched as she stood up and stole a quick kiss from him before heading off to their quarters. As much as he wanted to rescue her from being pin pricked and standing still for hours  he feared their ambassador more. 

That Antivan was scary when angry.

Chapter Text

“Inquisitor Lavellan! What a pleasure to finally meet you in person!” Archon Radonis smiled and broke off from the group of leaders. The Inquisition had finally arrived at the Winter Palace for the celebrations held to celebrate Corypheus’ defeat. The ball would be held the following night, but festivals and tournaments would occur throughout the week.

Right now, Celene had gathered leaders from across Thedas to meet the Herald and her advisors. They had only just arrived when servants whisked them off to the Grand Library. Cullen didn’t understand why they had to do this right away, but figured it was a good excuse to see Alistair and possibly stab Gaspard, so why not.

Helia smiled and bowed when she reached the Archon. Radonis had requested Inquisition aid in order to deal with Venatori forces on the border between Tevintar and Nevarra at the same time as King Markus, and she had decided to act on behalf of the Imperium. Partly due to how hard it was to gain the respect of Tevintar as an elf, and partly because Radonis had a soft spot for cats. 

Markus Pentaghast was the next to approach. The Nevarran king looked her up and down before speaking. “So. You’re the Herald my niece put her life on the line for. I hear you’ve killed many a dragon. I’d like to hear of your battles with them later.” 

Alistair was happy to see them. The Fereldan king simply grinned and bowed, giving Cullen a look that they’d catch up later. Cullen smiled and nodded back at him. He may be his king, but Alistair would always be his friend first.

Celene, Briala, and Gaspard approached after the other rulers had introduced themselves. “Inquisitor. It’s always a pleasure to see you.” Celene said warmly. “The same to you, Empress Celene. You are as radiant as ever.” Helia replied. 

“You flatter me! Lady Inquisitor, I welcome you to Halamshiral. If you don’t mind, we’d be honored if you’d join us for breakfast tomorrow. I assume you wish to spend the rest of the evening resting after your travels.”

“Of course, thank you. I would be honored to join you. If you’d excuse us, my friends and I are exhausted after our travels.” 

Cullen noticed the way Gaspard was eyeing her as they exited the room. He was not getting anywhere near her regardless of what he thought. He moved closer to the Inquisitor, wrapping his arm around her waist. As much as they wanted to keep their relationship away from the prying eyes of Orlais, right now his urge to protect her was stronger. 

“Well, that went better than expected!” Helia cheerfully said as the group approached their quarters. Dorian, Cassandra, and Viv headed off to their rooms after exchanging good nights while Josie went to go speak with some old friends of hers. 

Cullen opened the door to her room and held it open for her. “After you, Lady Helia.” He teased, causing her to giggle and give a fake curtsey. “Why thank you, Commander Cullen.” She replied as she entered the room, her beloved commander right behind her. “We have a long week ahead of us. No doubt we will be hounded by everyone.” He said, letting out a sigh. He really wished that they were going into battle with Red Templars instead of having to play the Game. 

“I’m excited to see what human festivals are like! Or at least, Orlesian festivals. No doubt Fereldan festivals are different.” She grinned and took his hands. “Oh yes. For starters no silly masks.”

She laughed, nodding in agreement. “That is true. But you were rather attractive and mysterious in yours back at the ball.” She kissed him, and the next thing they knew they were tangled in the sheets of the bed. Cullen’s hands traced her tiny frame as she laid against him, exhausted after their travels and their recent love making. He let out a happy sigh, kissing her head. 

“Last time we did this… was before Corypheus…” Helia mumbled, half asleep. He hummed in response as he traced circles on her arms. “Ma vhenan, I love you.” 

“I love you too, my dear.” He whispered, his eyes starting to close as he felt himself start drifting to sleep. He felt the Mage snuggle closer to him before he finally let sleep take him.

Cullen opened his eyes to find he was once again at the shrine in the forest. ‘I must be dreaming…’ He thought as he moved further inside to the statue. Once again, praying before it was Ghilan'nain. She seemed to sense his approach as she stood and turned to meet him. “Lion. It is good to see you once more.” She spoke calmly with a smile. “Yes, it’s good to see you as well. But… I thought you were unable to pass through the Veil.” He replied, noticing her smile fade.

“Yes. That is because the Veil is weakening. The Breach caused it to weaken considerably, and when your Inquisitor sealed it with Fen’Harel’s orb, it sealed the hole but at the expense of much power. It appears his plans are proceeding as he wished.”

“What? Are you saying he wishes to destroy the Veil?!”

“Yes. Lion of Fereldan, I do not have long as I am still recovering power from aiding in sealing the Breach, so let me tell you this. Do not trust the one known as Solas. He does not have yours or Helia’s best interests at heart.” The goddess warned, her expression turning grim. “And before you ask- yes, I aided her in sealing the torn Veil. Unlike many of my fellow Evanuris, I do not wish to see the world of the living and the world of dreams merged once more. It would result in death and destruction, akin to what Helia saw in the dark future. The Dread Wolf cares not for this, and instead wishes to restore the world to how it was prior to the Veil’s creation. And some of his power now resides in the Inquisitor.”

Cullen stepped back as he tried to take in everything he had been told. The Dread Wolf had a hand in Corypheus’ plans? And Helia… She was likely targeted by him because of the Anchor. “Wait. What does this have to do with Solas?” He asked, receiving a smile in response. Some in him twisted as he realized just what she was implying.

“ Solas is the Dread Wolf?!”

He didn’t get a response as he woke up. Helia was still asleep next to him, but he could see light sneak under the curtains as the sun rose. This time, he knew it wasn’t just a dream. He couldn’t chalk it up to being drunk in a Dalish shrine. This time there was nothing that could have influenced such a dream. 

That wasn’t what bothered him the most. It was the implications of the dream. That Fen’Harel had a hand in everything that had happened- the Conclave explosion, the Templars, the destruction of Haven- he either directly or indirectly caused everything the Inquisition had to deal with. And that he had been influencing them from the inside as Solas. This whole time the elf had been lying to them about everything! He had to tell Helia. But when he looked at her sleeping form, something in him couldn’t wake her up. She rarely got a chance to sleep so soundly, and he decided to let her sleep a bit longer. Cullen would explain everything when she woke up.

Chapter Text

To say Cullen didn’t get a chance to talk to Helia in private that day was an understatement. After breakfast she was whisked off to meetings and to prepare for tonight. Currently, he was dealing with Dorian and Alistair while they finished getting ready.

“So, when are you gonna propose?” Dorian asked with a smirk. Cullen’s face heated up at the question. “W-When I’m ready to! Maker, you are just as bad as Hawke!” He sputtered in response. Alistair was chuckling at his answer, before mischievously grinning. 

“Well if you don’t, I will.”

“Alistair you may be my king but I will still kill you.”

Dorian snickered at the former Warden’s faux anger. “What- how dare you threaten me! You owe me!” “Owe you what? My dessert?” “Why yes! That will appease your ruler.”

“You Fereldans are so strange. But I’m starting to see why women are so attracted to you. Other than your looks, that is.”

The king looked at the Mage in confusion. “What?”

“Ignore it, Alistair.” Cullen gave Dorian a look that clearly said “quit teasing!” while he adjusted the other Fereldan’s crown. “There. Now you don’t look like a mess.” He stated, stepping back to look his friend over. “Thank the Maker we don’t need any masks this time around. You realize how frustrating that was?” 

“I always thought it was silly. Especially during negotiations.” The king agreed, opening the door. “Shall we, gentlemen?”

Cole was waiting outside the door, fidgeting with his suit. The boy had been waiting for them after finishing getting dressed. He seemed nervous and had wanted some air, and still seemed anxious about attending the party. “Ready Cole?” Dorian asked, and Cullen watched as he visibly relaxed and nodded in response. “You should go meet up with Helia. We’ll be right behind you.” The Mage said in a clear attempt to give the boy more time to calm down. The two Fereldans nodded and headed towards the vestibule where Helia, Cassandra, and Josephine were waiting. 

The three women were waiting for them at the entryway. Cassandra was grumbling about having to leave her sword behind while Josephine was arguing that she let her “bring a dagger that might as well be a sword” and that they’d do everything possible to avoid any conversations between her and her uncle. The ambassador received a thankful look in response. 

When he finally saw Helia, Cullen’s heart nearly stopped. For a moment he thought the Halla Mother had escaped the Fade and stood before him. Her gown was so similar to that of Ghilan'nain’s that he wondered if she had subtly influenced its design. A sheer shawl was draped over her shoulders to hide her scars, which she was only comfortable letting Cullen or one of their friends see. She wore a circlet with the Inquisition’s symbol on her forehead, and apparently Josie had managed to get her to wear some makeup as her cheeks and lips were redder than usual. She was currently staring at the Mark like she was hoping something would happen.

“Ladies.” Alistair greeted, bowing awkwardly. “Alistair. It is good to see you.” Cassandra smiled at the two and elbowed Helia, bringing her from her daze. “Huh- Oh. Hello Alistair.” She said, giving a small smile. Her smile grew and she began to blush upon seeing Cullen. He simply smiled back and approached her, offering her his arm. “May I escort you, Lady Inquisitor?”

“Of course, Ser Rutherford.” She replied, taking his arm. By now Dorian and Cole had caught up with the group and Alistair had entered the ballroom ahead of them. But for these two, time seemed to slow and they were the only people that existed. Stepping through the doors, they stood at the top of the staircase as they were announced.

“Lady Helia Lavellan, the Herald of Andraste and the Inquisitor, and Ser Cullen Stanton Rutherford, Commander of Inquisition forces and former Knight-Commander of the Templar Order in Kirkwall!”

No doubt many eyebrows were raised and bets lost at the sight. The rumors that the Inquisitor and her Commander were courting one another had just been confirmed, not by the announcement but by the way they looked at one another. It was clear to many in the room that the couple only had eyes for one another, and how they gazed at each other with eyes full of love. 

As they approached Empress Celene, they separated and bowed. “Empress Celene. It is an honor to be here in Halamshiral once again. Please, accept my thanks for the invitation.” Helia said, and once again Cullen was amazed at how well she was able to play the Game.

“My Dear Inquisitor, you are the guest of honor. We could not celebrate the defeat of Corypheus without you.” The Empress gave them a smile. Briala stood next to her, holding hands with Celene. They clearly didn’t care what Orlais said about their relationship anymore; afterall if the Inquisitor, the Hero of Thedas, was an elf in a relationship with a human, then why couldn’t the Empress and the Marquis of the Dales? 

Gaspard, however, was studying them from where he stood. The Grand Duke seemed irritated by the reveal they were together. Cullen was happy with that. Gaspard was going to have other things to worry about by the end of the night. He was drawn from his thoughts when Celene smiled and offered them the first dance.

The Fereldan and the Elf knew they couldn’t refuse without offending her, and so they made their way to the center of the dance floor. Pulling Helia close to his chest, they began to dance. A dance previously only the moon and stars were privy to. Somehow, despite all the eyes on them, Cullen felt like he was back in their secret garden. Helia had locked eyes with him and clearly was ignoring everyone else. It was only when the music stopped and the clapping began did either of them snap out of their trance. Celene declared the ball to begin and partygoers flooded the dance floor. 

Leading her off the dance floor, he gave her hand a quick squeeze of encouragement. “Have I ever told you that dancing with you feels like a magical spell? I always seem to forget anyone else is around.” He whispered to her, smirking as a blush spread across her face. “And here I thought you only danced with me because I asked.” She replied with a smile. “Well, there’s that too.” 

“Excuse me, may I ask the Inquisitor for a dance?” 

The two turned to see Alistair, smiling and offering his hand. Helia giggled and nodded, taking his hand. “Don’t worry Cullen, I’m not going to steal her forever!” The king grinned before they headed back to the dance floor. The Commander chuckled and headed off to find something to drink (before he found a good spot to hide from his admirers). Or, at least, that was the plan when Briala stopped him. 

“Commander. The Empress and I wish to speak with you in private.” She quietly said before leading the way to Celene’s study in the library. The Empress stood at her desk, reading over a report. “Commander Cullen. I understand that your letter says my cousin and several chevaliers are committing murders behind my back. Explain. I do not take such claims lightly.” She ordered. Her voice was like ice. It was clear that despite the clear distrust and, to put it lightly, dislike she had for Gaspard, Celene was not pleased with the possibility of her cousin being slandered. 

“Of course, Empress. Our former Spymaster discovered that missing elves from all across Orlais were kidnapped and taken to a mansion deep in the Emerald Graves. A scouting party led by myself discovered supply lines and according to merchants there is an event held at the mansion each year.” He began, explaining just what occurred at these hunts and that Gaspard himself owned the mansion in secret. 

“That bastard!” Briala growled when he finished. She looked ready to rip the Grand Duke’s face off. “... I had heard rumors about the graduation tradition, but I was always assured they were simply rumors. To know they were true, and that my cousin slaughters innocent elves for sport… Briala. Ready the guards.” Celene turned to Cullen. “It is only fair you get to confront him with the news he will be arrested. That is, if you wish to.”

“I would be honored and pleased to do so.”

Cassandra was leaning against a wall observing the party. She wished she could have been anywhere but here. Seeing her uncle, even from a distance, brought up memories she had tried to forget. Taking a glass of wine from a servant walking by, she let out a sigh.

“Something bothering you?”

The Seeker looked up to see Dorian joining her with a drink in hand. “It’s nothing. I take it you’re enjoying yourself?” She asked. He smiled and shrugged. “Once again, I feel homesick. Especially with the Archon here. Reminds me of some of the best parties I attended in Tevinter.”

“How anyone enjoys these things is a mystery.” She grumbled. The Mage chuckled and leaned on the wall next to her. “Well, at least Helia is having fun.” He remarked, gesturing towards their friend. The Inquisitor was currently sharing a dance with a noble, smiling and laughing. She hadn’t left the dance floor since Alistair asked her to dance; each time she finished a dance with someone, another would ask her to dance. She looked around for Cullen every so often, and upon not seeing him would agree to the next invitation.

“Yes. It is good to see her relax after everything. But she never sits still for long.” Cassandra replied, shaking her head. “She wants to investigate Frostback Basin as soon as possible. Apparently she feels drawn there due to it being Ameridan’s possible resting place.” She said. Dorian nodded and gestured towards Celene, Briala, and Cullen’s return. “Ah, and they’re back!”

“He’s going to expose Gaspard…” Cole whispered, causing the two to jump. “Cole! When did you- oh nevermind.” Dorian muttered, moving his focus back to Cullen.

Currently, Helia was dancing with the Grand Duke in question. She wasn’t exactly pleased to do so, but declining would be considered offensive. It was what he was proposing, however, that she found offensive. “Uniting the Inquisition with Orlais through marriage benefits both sides. I am next in line to be Emperor, and seeing as my cousin clearly has no plans for marriage any time soon, chances are the nobles will force her to abdicate. With you at my side-”

“The only place you will be is in prison.” Cullen interrupted, stepping between them. “Excuse me?!” Gaspard spat while Helia looked at her partner in confusion. “Grand Duke Gaspard. You’d be willing to look past the Inquisitor being an elf? Seems hypocritical of you. After all, you hunt elves with several chevalier friends of yours.” Cullen continued, nudging the Inquisitor behind him. A hand rested on the pommel of his sword, ready to draw it in case the Orlesian put up a fight. 

“Commander, what you are saying is insane! How dare you make such claims!”

“Cullen… what do you mean?” Helia whispered. He glanced at her before returning his focus on Gaspard. “We found your mansion in the Graves. And evidence that you are connected with several missing elves across Orlais. It’s already obvious you see them as beneath you with how you refer to them as ‘rabbits’ and refuse to show them any common decency.”

Gaspard was silent as Orlesian guards approached him. “You… how dare you!” He roared, practically foaming at the mouth. He ripped something silver from his side and lunged at the Fereldan, and suddenly, Helia was between them with a dagger in her shoulder. Guards grabbed the disgraced duke and dragged him away while Cullen remained standing in shock. Helia went to pull out the blade when he stopped her, leading her to an alcove for some privacy. “Careful. We don’t know if it was poisoned.” He gently warned before pulling it out. No evidence of poison appeared on the dagger, and Helia had already removed her shawl to use as a bandage. Once it had been tightly tied around the wound, she gave him a look of frustration and disappointment. “How long have you known he has been doing that to my people?!”

“Since… Since the first time we came here. Solas had mentioned it to me and I looked into it. Speaking of Solas-”

“Later. But I’m still mad you hid this from me.” She said, seeing one of Celene’s handmaidens approaching. “I should go tell her I’m fine. But you have a lot of explaining to do.” With that she left to go inform everyone that she was fine.

Cullen was so dead later.

Chapter Text

“I can’t believe you hid this from me! Not only have you been investigating Gaspard, but on your camping trip- which turns out was really a scouting mission- you spoke with the Halla Mother?! And you never thought it would be a good idea to let me know?!”

Cullen flinched as Helia continued to rant about his actions. She was beyond pissed. “In my defense, the first time I spoke to Ghilan'nain, I thought it was simply a dream- nothing more than that. And I hadn’t had a chance to speak with you about last night.” He attempted to hopefully calm her down. But it seemed to upset her even more. 

“Alright. I’ll give you that. But the whole Hunt thing?! Don’t you think that as Inquisitor I should know just what he was up to? Keeping secrets was part of Lelianna’s job so I get her not telling me what her scouts discovered about him, but you?! I thought you trusted me enough to tell me these things!”

“I was only trying to protect you! It was bad enough Solas was in danger because of it! I couldn’t… I couldn’t put you in Gaspard’s sights more than you already were. If he thought you knew anything…” Cullen looked away from her. He knew how dangerous investigating Gaspard was. He was prepared for the worst to happen to him should they be discovered. But the Orlesian already had eyes on Helia. If he had suspicions she was involved, he’d likely figure out a way to blackmail her or worse. 

Her gaze softened and she placed a hand on his cheek. “Cullen I…. I should’ve realized that. I’m just upset that even Solas knew… I thought he shared everything with me…” She quietly said. Cullen sighed before telling her about Solas.

“About him… According to Ghilan'nain, he’s Fen’Harel.”

“What.” 

After several minutes of explaining later, Cullen now had a very panicked, very blubbery Inquisitor. She was crying over how she thought Solas had trusted her and while she had a feeling his name wasn’t truly Solas, that he had told the truth about everything else. To discover that not only was his name likely the only truth he ever shared but that he was the agent of chaos and rebellion, the Dread Wolf himself, was heartbreaking. Cullen held her as she cried, rubbing her back and waited until her sobs had died down to hiccups before saying anything else. 

“Helia… I’m truly sorry. I feared this would upset you but I had to tell you.” He said, holding her close to his chest. She nodded, looking up and resting her chin on his chest. “I know… Let’s get out of here.” She said, and he nodded.

The next day, the group set off to Skyhold while Helia and Cullen accompanied Alistair home. It also meant they could stop at one of the festivals in a Fereldan village. The plan was that he’d take Helia to see his family and then they’d meet up with Dorian, Sera, and Bull in the Basin. The former Warden had shared what Solas had told him about his heritage, setting off questions from Helia from where she rode on Hellathen. 

“Why did he say your eyes give you away? Do you think if you went to the Crossroads you’d see all the colors like I did or would it be all dull like Morrigan saw? We think it had to do with me being an elf. Oh! If you had a child with an elf, do you think they’d present more as an elf or a human? Is that why you were somehow able to reverse the Blight in you? Want me to teach you some Elivish? The only other elf I talk to really is Sera and while I love her she doesn’t like talking about Elvish stuff-” 

“Love, breathe. You’re overwhelming him.” Cullen said with a chuckle. Alistair seemed a bit overwhelmed by her questions and was struggling to pick which question to answer first. She took a deep breath but before she could exhale and shoot off more questions, Cullen reached over from his horse and covered her mouth. “I mean it. Give him a minute.”

Alistair gave him an appreciative smile, while Helia proceeded to lick his hand. “Ugh! Helia!” Cullen yanked his hand back and wiped it on his cape. “What’s wrong, Cully Wully?” She asked innocently. Alistair burst out laughing at the nickname. “Cully Wully? Oh Maker, I am so using that next time!”

“Use that name and you’ll wish Anora had become queen.”

Helia was about to laugh when her face contorted in pain and she cried out, falling from her hart. Hellathen stopped and looked at the elf in what Cullen could only interpret as confusion. He had practically jumped from his horse and scrambled to her side. She was laying on the ground, clutching her hand while the Anchor flared and released green tendrils of magic. “Helia?! What’s going on?! Are you injured?!” He asked, looking her over for any possible injuries from falling from her mount. The man didn’t want to consider what it meant for the Mark to be acting up. Alistair had since joined them, standing behind Cullen and holding the reins to their mounts. 

“It feels like… its like the Veil is trying to tear apart…” She let out another cry of pain as magic pulsed through her again and she curled into a ball. He went to try and at least move her from the middle of the road and try to lessen her pain, but the oddest thing happened. The moment he touched her, the Anchor stopped acting up. Her cries of pain died down to whimpers and eventually confusion. 

“What in the world just happened?” Alistair whispered. Both Helia and Cullen looked at each other in confusion. “I… I have no idea.” Cullen said as he helped Helia to her feet. “Maybe we should make camp for today. Let you rest.” 

She simply nodded in response, holding her hand close to her chest like she was afraid it would react again.

Solas frowned and pulled his hand away from the eluvian. He had begun to try and tear down the Veil, yet he kept hesitating as he knew it would cause Helia immense pain. This time, he had finally managed to attempt to reach across the Veil from the Crossroads only to be stopped by something. And as he stared into the mirror he could see the exact moment the Anchor had been cut off from him yet again. The second that Templar laid his hand on her, Solas’ connection to Helia and the Anchor had been severed. If the man no longer had his Silence ability, then how did he stop an influx of magic?! 

As much as it pained him, Solas had managed to come to terms with having to cause the Inquisitor pain in order to destroy the Veil. After all, she was essentially one of several possible keys across the Veil into the Fade. She was a living contradiction- a being that could live in both worlds without consequence. She could open doorways in the Veil through Rifts and close these doorways as well. But he knew the longer he wasn’t around to control the Anchor, the more unstable it would become and the more it would eat away at her. That was why he had to remove the Veil as soon as possible. Once it was gone, the Anchor would simply fade away and no longer be a threat to her. 

And if it still was, he would be around to control it and keep it in check. She was linked to him, and he to her through that mark. Despite being one of Ghilan'nain’s children (as his former ally referred to her followers as), once she touched that orb she was unable to communicate with the Halla Mother despite existing both in the Fade and here. Something that he had made sure of- if her innocence was corrupted by the Evanuris, she would never want anything to do with him even as he was trying to help with Corypheus. And yet, that damned woman had instead reached out to the Templar for aid. She found someone who had a strong bond with Helia and who had no connection to Solas that he could influence. 

Ghilan'nain had always been like that. She always found ways around the others to proceed with her own plans. She was so young compared to the rest of the group and had moments where she became almost feral- once, he and Andruil had discovered her wounded after she had gone out on a walk and never returned. Ghilan'nain had lashed out at them like a cornered animal, and only after Andruil had tossed her bow away from them did she start to calm down. The look in her eyes was that of a cornered animal that refused to go down without a fight. Later, Sylaise concluded that seeing as she is the embodiment of the halla, she had moments of losing herself in times of intense stress or injury. 

She was normally the least likely to get involved with most matters. So why insert herself now? 

Shaking his head, Solas returned his attention to the eluvian. He didn’t have time to wonder about such things. He had work to do.

Alistair sat at the campfire keeping watch. They had set up camp shortly after Helia had collapsed from the Anchor flaring up. Currently, Cullen and Helia were asleep in their tent, no doubt clinging to one another in their sleep. He honestly found it cute, if not nostalgic. It was only a decade ago that he was the former Templar asleep with an Elven Mage sleeping next to him. He had been willing to stand against his own people and make her their queen, regardless of being an elf or a mage. But she had given her life to hopefully give the people of Fereldan a reason to view Elves in a new light. 

And her act of selflessness had worked. Fereldans had started to trust Elves more and treat them better. Alistair had been working to abolish the alienages and letting elves live alongside humans. And now, another Elven Mage had risen to the challenge and defeated evil. 

He found it somewhat ironic that the Templar afraid of magic fell in love with a hero who’s a Mage. Ironic but rather cute. And seeing how opposite their personalities were at times was even better. Helia was bubbly and welcoming while Cullen was reserved and at times intimidating (fair). She was sheltered from much of the world by her clan- including the majority of the Blight- while Cullen had seen the worst the world could offer. 

The man smiled and looked up at the stars. “You’re making sure everything turns out alright even now,  Ma vhenan. I love you.” He whispered. A gentle breeze blew by and for a moment, Alistair could believe she had heard him and was by his side.

Chapter Text

It was worth the trip to see Helia’s face at the sight of the festival in Denerim. The entire city was celebrating the defeat of Corypheus and their king’s safe return. To hopefully prevent them from being recognized, Cullen and Helia wore cloaks to appear as normal people. Helia had to keep her hood up slightly to hide her ears and vallaslin just in case, but for the most part they were able to slip through the crowd unnoticed. 

The elf was looking around at everything from the stalls to the decorations to the people. She was awestruck by the sights and smells around them, and was holding onto Cullen’s hand tightly to avoid getting separated. Every so often she’d stop to look at something and would excitedly ask about it. He’d answer the best he could with a smile on his face.

Currently, they were sharing some fried dough with jelly inside. Helia had been amazed by it, convinced it had to be magic to get the jelly in it. Cullen assured her that as much as he was sure baking was a school of magic, he was certain they had simply piped it inside. 

“My mother used to make these for festivals when I was a child. She used some kind of tube to get the jelly inside the dough before she fried them. My younger brother was born close to a festival day so on his birthday, she’d make him his own batch with his favorite jelly.” He smiled as he remembered his childhood. His mother was the best chef he ever knew, and always knew the best thing to make for when he or his siblings were upset or sick. 

“I’m jealous. We didn’t have treats like this in my clan. We did, however, have this sweet made from tree sap.” She said. Upon seeing his face she explained. “The sap could be made into syrup and sugar when boiled, and before it cools you can make candy out of it! You could only make it at a certain point of the year so it was a yearly treat. I always looked forward to it.”

“Sounds delicious. We should try and make some one day.” He replied as they came across several game stalls. Toys hung from the sides of the stands as prizes. Cullen noticed one game where a large stuffed halla hung as the grand prize. Helia had also noticed it and was staring at it. “I thought stuffed animals were tiny!” She exclaimed, eyes glued to the toy. In that moment he resolved to win her the stuffed toy. He led the way to the stall, a dart game in which you tried to pop balloons tied to a board. Helia stood back a bit and watched as he paid the man running the stall and received darts to use. It wasn’t long until the halla was placed in her arms by her boyfriend after several attempts. The money spent on the game was worth the enormous smile that stretched across her face upon receiving the toy. She hugged it tightly and dubbed it Enansal. When he asked what it meant she replied with “It means a gift or blessing. Seeing as it’s a gift from a blessing in my life, it’s fitting. Right?” 

By the end of the night the two were laughing and stumbling into their inn room, tipsy from the drinks they shared. Cullen, in all his flirty drunk glory, was kissing her neck and shoulder the moment the door was locked. Clothes were ripped off and Enansal was placed by their bags before they climbed into bed together. She let out a moan as he started making his way down to her chest and then further down.

It wasn’t until the sun was rising did they wake. Cullen smiled and kissed Helia’s forehead as she woke up, smiling up at him. “Good morning, love.” He whispered. “Good morning.” She replied, snuggling closer. “C’mon, we have to get up.” 

She let out a noise of complaint as he got up. He shivered from the cold and part of him wanted to crawl back under the covers. But they had work to do.

“Come on love, we have to head to Frostback Basin. We promised to meet them there.” He said while pulling his shirt on. Helia sat up in bed, pulling the covers around her. “I know… but could we stay a bit longer?” She asked and he shook his head. “No. And if you want breakfast, we need to get up before everyone else eats it all.” Her ears perked up at the mention of food and she dragged herself out of bed and started to get dressed. “Can we get some baked goods to take on the road? I wanna share some with everyone! Dorian and I were discussing types of food in Thedas and I wanna let him try some Fereldan foods!”

Cullen chuckled and nodded. “Of course. Anything to prove we have better food than Tevintar.”

“Hey we haven’t had their cuisine so you can’t say that!”

“It’s true. We simply have the best food.”

“Cullen!”

He laughed as she hit his chest and pouted. “Alright alright, Dalish food does sound good. And the Free Marches also has good food. But I’ll always say my homeland’s food is the best.” He said as they left the room, each carrying a small travel pack. As Inquisition forces had come to enjoy the festivities, they sent back any gifts and bags they didn’t need with them when they left for Skyhold. This included Enansal, and Helia had made sure the toy was to be delivered to her quarters safely and with respect. She was treating it like a real halla, which made sense when she pointed out it was made with halla pelts and therefore deserved the respect one gives a living halla. 

Climbing on their mounts, Cullen looked back to the city and smiled. He promised Alistair they’d visit when it calmed down a bit. The king had many things to do following the defeat of Corypheus from helping hunt down the remaining Red Templars in Fereldan to focusing on areas affected by the Templar-Mage War. Hopefully the next time they meet, things will be better. 

With that, the couple set off towards the Basin.

Chapter Text

Frostback Basin, despite its name, felt more like a tropical paradise than a cold river basin.  Brightly colored birds squawked at people from the trees, huge roots from trees acted like bridges, and the platforms in the trees felt like something out of fairytales. The river lazily cut through the valley from the mountains while old ruins blended into the landscape. If the rumors were true and this was the last place Ameridan was seen, Cullen wouldn’t blame him. The place was beautiful.

Part of him immediately felt at home in the wild and untamed basin. His grandfather had told stories of his homeland,at the foot of the Frostbacks and how the gods would know and welcome his family back. ‘Gods’ referring to the spirits the people here worshiped; Cullen had nothing against other religions but asking spirits for help made him uncomfortable for obvious reasons. He tolerated Cole before he became more human because he was their ally and it wasn’t until recently that he felt comfortable being around him and talking with the boy. Trusting spirits that were more or less tied to the Fade wasn’t in his comfort zone. 

He finished setting up his and Helia’s tent in the Inquisition camp while Helia spoke with Scout Harding. As he approached to join them he caught the tail end of their conversation.

“A group of hostile Avvar called the Jaws of Hakkon have been attacking our men and preventing us from setting up camps along the river and setting up a foothold. If possible, think you could help them out a bit? It should be on your way to see the Avvar chief.” Harding remarked. Cullen felt a chill run down his spine at the mention of the Avvar god of winter and war.

“Remember, never cross Hakkon Wintersbreath unless you wish to have no luck in battle or winter. He is not a forgiving god.” Cullen’s grandfather said as he finished telling the children gathered around him a story about Hakkon. “Cullen, you claim to wish to join those Templars? Then you best impress him. He’ll give you aid in battle should he favor you.”

“Grandfather! Templars only believe in the Maker!”

“Watch your tongue! Hakkon is more real than you think, more real than the Maker! How else do you resist the cold so well, or have such a gift for tactics?”

Hakkon was who one prayed to for skill in battle. Considering how many Avvar raided the lowlands, it made sense for a cult to form around him. But the fact they were attacking Inquisition forces simply trying to scout out the area was concerning. 

“Oh! The professor wanted to talk to you. He’s further in camp.” Harding said before pointing to a treehouse further inside. The group began to make their way to the treehouse. Scattered around camp were books and archaeological supplies. Inquisition soldiers and historians shared stories and drinks by campfires while scouts discussed any ruins they discovered. Helia seemed interested in joining in on the conversations but was steered away by Bull in the direction of Professor Kenric. The man was looking over what appeared to be a dagger and several buckles on a table. Papers were scattered around him and Cullen felt his OCD kicking in. How could anyone work in such disorder?! The least he could do was pick his notes up off the floor!

“Professor Kenric? I’m Helia Lavellan. I understand you’re studying my predecessor?” Helia introduced herself, giving the historian a smile. She had all but read all the history books they had in Skyhold at least twice, and was doing her best to hold back her excitement. “Ah! Inquisitor! It’s a pleasure to meet you! Yes, I’m studying Inquisitor Ameridan. While my colleagues were content with assuming everything about him was settled, I had questions. Why did he simply vanish during the Second Blight? He was thought to have been close friends with Emperor Drakon I, so why would he leave him to fight alone?

“And then there are the rumors he had a mage lover! Is this true? If it is, was it erased by the Chantry? There are so many possibilities!”

The professor and Inquisitor launched into a discussion of theories and recent discoveries. Cullen didn’t understand what they were talking about exactly- something about buckles?- but seeing Helia so excited made him happy. When she would talk to him about her discoveries or simply something she found interesting that he didn’t necessarily understand, he would try his best to understand or would simply listen to her. She knew he didn’t always get what she was talking about but the fact he was willing to listen and ask questions made her happy.

“Ready Cullen? We’re off to the Lady’s Rest!”

Helia was smiling at him, waiting for an answer. He hesitated and looked at Kenric. “The Lady’s Rest? Referring to the Lady of the Skies? We may have trouble going there.” He said, frowning. “The Lady is the goddess of the dead in Avvar society. We might need permission to go to an island seen as sacred to her.” He explained. The rest of the group stared at him in surprise. “What?”

“Uh, nothing Commander. I just didn’t expect ya to know that kinda stuff.” Bull replied before leading the way outside. Helia looked at him quizzically and he gave her a look that said he’d explain later.

Chapter Text

Discussing his Avvar heritage was always strange for Cullen. Most Fereldans saw the Avvar as simple barbaric heathens. They pillaged, they refused the Chant of Light, and despite many holds lying within Fereldan’s borders they refused to call themselves Fereldan. The two cultures rarely interacted in Fereldan unless it was a raid by the Avvar. 

His grandfather, Amund FireWatcher, had once been one of the barbarians raiding Honnleath many years ago. It was there he met Leandra Stanton, a weaver and member of the town guard. According to the stories his grandparents told, she had bested Amund in combat, only to nurse him back to health when his clan members left him after assuming the worst. It was then he decided to marry her.  Seeing as Leandra made it clear that she was happy in her village and wasn’t willing to simply marry a man she just met, the Avvar chose to remain in Honnleath with her. He was a skilled hunter and quickly established himself as the supplier for the town butcher. After one attempted bridenapping and a marriage ceremony, the two settled into married life. 

While his grandfather agreed to raise their children in the Chantry, he did teach them about his people. And when Cullen and his siblings were old enough, they learned the stories and customs of their ancestors. As a result, Cullen had knowledge of Avvar traditions and customs. Something he rarely shared. 

“Your grandfather was an Avvar warrior? That honestly doesn’t surprise me. You got some of their features.” Bull said after Cullen explained his family tree. Dorian currently had his hand over Helia’s mouth to hold back a barrage of questions about just about everything he knew about the Avvar. Sera was still freaked out. “So you’re tellin’ me your grandpa worshiped demons an’ shit? An’ you didn’t think to tell us?! He does sound badass but the whole demons thing is bad!” She snapped. Helia got herself free of Dorian and stepped between the two. “Sera. Cullen had no reason to share this with us before now. And the Avvar do not worship demons. They worship spirits. Spirits simply become demons depending on the situation they are in.” She explained to the rogue as calmly as she could. Seeing as the other elf looked ready to stab someone, Cullen was prepared to pull her out of harm’s way. Luckily Sera relaxed slightly and backed off, grumbling  about how ‘Only Helia could make demons sound so not evil.’ 

It wasn’t until later by the campfire did he and Helia get to discuss this revelation privately. Cullen chuckled as he was hit by a barrage of questions about his knowledge on the Avvar. Somehow, he was always surprised by just how sheltered and curious Helia was about the world. “So the Avvar gods are really powerful spirits?” She asked after he explained the interactions between man and spirit. “In the most basic way, yes. But Korth, The Lady, and Hakkon are considered to be the most powerful and sacred. All holds worship them. Spirits are more like patrons than gods- think of them similarly to your Elven gods. You pray to different ones for certain reasons; the Avvar simply have more gods.”

“Is that why there seems to be a specific cult to Hakkon?”

“Maybe. My grandfather never mentioned any cults, but that may have been because we were children.” He said. The elf nodded and cuddled closer to him, closing her eyes. “... I can feel him. Ameridan, I mean. He’s here somewhere. I know it.” She whispered. “His spirit must still linger then. It’s possible he is calling out to you in hopes to finally be laid to rest.” Cullen replied quietly, staring into the flames of the campfire. “Maybe…” She let out a yawn and leaned her head on his shoulder. Cullen chuckled and picked her up in his arms and carried her to their tent, only returning briefly to the fire to put it out before going to bed.

Helia shivered as a bone chilling cold enveloped the area she stood. Before her were two figures frozen in time. The first was an enormous dragon, lunging forwards at a pedestal in the middle of the room. It looked to be mere moments from snapping its jaws around the figure kneeling on the tall rock. 

The second figure was harder to make out. She could tell they were either human or elf based on their general size and that they were a mage from the staff they held, but other than that, she couldn’t identify the person. And yet, she felt like she somehow knew them. Something about the figure called to her, a welcoming and protective aura radiating from them. Was this Ameridan? Frozen in time like the Tevintar Ruins she once came across?

The moment she thought of the ruins frozen in time her dream changed. The dragon and person disappeared and the cold biting at her bones was replaced with the heat from her blood boiling. She let out a silent scream as her limbs contorted painfully and she was back in that cell being experimented on. Venatori stood around her watching in joy as she lost control of her body and was trapped in her own mind. This time when she first encountered Cullen and Solas and Varric she made sure there would be no rescue. 

Varric’s motionless body lay in a doorway, Bianca shattered at his feet.

Solas pinned to a wall by his own staff, blood trickling from his lips.

And Cullen, begging her to come back to him just as she raised her staff and brought it down-

“ NO! ” 

“Helia what’s wrong?!”

Strong arms wrapped around her as she struggled to get out and get away. She was dangerous, she had to get away before she hurt them-

A warm and familiar weight was wrapped around her shoulders as a voice repeatedly comforted her with assurances that she was safe and they would never let that happen to her again. She forced herself to look up and saw the worried honey colored eyes and curly blond hair that belonged to her beloved. “ Ma vhenan , Are you alright?” He asked. She gave a small smile at his attempt to speak Elven and nodded. “It… It was just a bad dream. But it started off with me seeing a dragon and a person frozen in time.” She explained the dream, tearing up as she began to tell him when the nightmare had begun. 

Cullen stopped her there, pulling her closer to him and rubbing her back. “You don’t have to explain if it makes you upset. You’re safe now and that’s all that matters.” He said as he gave her a smile. “Yeah… after all I have my strong Avvar Templar to protect me.” She smiled back at him. He rolled his eyes. “I’m never going to escape that now, am I?”

“Nope!”

The following day, the group set off towards the Avvar hold. Along the way, they came across more of the Jaws of Hakkon who attacked them the moment they saw them. The sight of magically summoned weapons the Jaws of Hakkon wielded worried Cullen. They were mentioned in tales of those who gained favor with the god of winter- magical weapons gifted by Hakkon or forged with metal he blessed. For the Jaws of Hakkon to possess such items meant that they indeed had his favor in some way. 

By the time they reached the hold, the group was tired and out of healing potions. The sight of two men climbing a cliff greeted them as they moved further inside the village. “What are they doing…?” Helia asked, confusion crossing her face. “Likely settling a dispute.” He answered, again to the surprise of the group. Upon completion of the climb, two Avvar turned to face them. The first was Svarah Sun-Hair, the thane of Stone-Bear Hold whose permission they needed to reach The Lady’s Rest. The second was Gurd Harofsen, the leader of the Jaws of Hakkon. The man was studying them as they approached the two. “Inquisitor. I understand you’ve met my warriors already. I’m impressed that a low-lander could defeat them in combat. Perhaps you are a worthy opponent. Seeing as you are my fellow thane’s guests, we will have to answer that question another time.” Gurd turned towards Cullen, looking him over. “Hmm. You look like an old friend of my father’s. Apparently his brother married a lowlander. Such a traitor.”

“My family’s past is none of your concern.” Cullen growled back. The man chuckled and walked away, shaking his head. “I apologize for that. Gurd is a stubborn, stupid fool.” Svarah sighed before giving them a smile. “Please, let us speak in private.”

After Helia explained why they were there and that they required assistance with reaching The Lady’s Rest, Svarah was all for aiding them. She agreed that Ameridan deserved to be laid to rest and that should they need her help with anything else, to just ask. When asked about the Jaws of Hakkon, she requested they first find the hold beast.

“You want us to find a… bear?” Helia asked, eyebrows raised. “Not just any bear. Storvacker is the hold-beast.” the thane replied. “A hold-beast is a bit like a mascot that also is the tie between a clan and the gods. When it's strong and happy, everything is great. When they become ill or die, it’s never a good omen.” Cullen explained after seeing the barrage of questions about to erupt. “That is correct, lowlander. I take it from your knowledge and Gurd’s comment you are Avvar?”

“My grandfather was. He came from Red Lion Hold before meeting my grandmother.” He replied. “Red Lion… That is where the Jaws of Hakkon hail from. Or, hailed from. After the Fifth Blight nearly all from that clan were wiped out. Gurd only survived because he joined a mercenary group.”

His grandfather’s clan… gone? Gurd had mentioned his grandfather having a brother, meaning he likely had family living there. Meaning even more family had been killed in the Blight. Any hopes of fulfilling his grandfather’s wish of his grandchildren visiting his clan was dashed with that revelation. 

Chapter Text

“So this is The Lady’s Rest…” Helia whispered. The group quietly climbed onto the dock of the small island. It was covered in fog, and visible spirits roamed around, occasionally passing through them. “I really don’t like this place, Boss…” Bull whispered, likely hoping to speed this up. Part of Cullen agreed, but another part of him felt like they were trespassing on sacred ground. This island belonged to The Lady, so it was the spirits’ home. They were still living and should not be here.

Helia seemed to know exactly where to go. She made a beeline for a ruined shack up on a hill. A tiny barrier emitted from inside it, and flashes of someone’s memories would appear inside. “Amazing… we can see remnants of a person’s life…” Dorian whispered. She reached forward and touched the barrier, and closed her eyes as a feeling of calm came over her.

Ameridan? Is that you? 

A voice echoed in her mind. The spirit residing here seemed to think she was the previous Inquisitor and possibly knew him.

No, I’m sorry. I’m Helia Lavellan, his successor. I’m looking for his remains so he may finally rest. Did you know him?

I did- no, she did. Telana. We-They loved each other. She was wounded and came here to sleep and find him in dreams.

Telana was a mage? And… I’m guessing she passed away..

Yes. I promised to stay here and wait in her place. Please, find him and let him know that she is waiting for him…

I will. You can rest now.

She opened her eyes just as a surge of energy hit her. The Anchor flared, causing her to stumble, and like that the spirit was gone. Images of spires and a fortress flashed in her mind briefly, giving her the location of Ameridan’s last whereabouts.

 Cullen steadied her with a panicked look on his face, likely afraid of possible possession. “That was… that was a spirit who took on Telana’s role of waiting for Ameridan. Apparently they were lovers.” She explained. “Kinda like how Cole more or less became the human Cole- except this time, the spirit simply remained behind while Telana passed on. I also know where we should start searching.” 

Sera, who had stayed back to keep watch, began shouting that “those cock sucking Hakkonites followed us!”, sending the group into battle mode. It would not be until much later, after they had returned to Kenric and explained what they had discovered (including an official letter from Drakon himself), that Helia would again see Ameridan in her dreams.

Still knelt down in front of the dragon, he was like a statue. Helia couldn’t get close enough to get a good look at him, but somehow she felt like he was breathing. This time she could feel anger radiate from the dragon held in stasis, but she still couldn’t understand what had happened. Maybe this was just her mind trying to put the facts together? 

When she heard the statue speak, that idea went out the window.

“Who’s there? I can sense you. How and why are you in my mind?” 

“AHH! DON’T DO THAT!!!” 

The man recoiled slightly in pain. “Calm down. I should be the one screaming. You’re in my mind.”

“Well it’s my dream.”

He chuckled. “You have a point. I am Ameridan.”

“Wait really?! I’m your successor! Helia Lavellan,  and it’s an honor to meet you.”

Despite the distance, she could tell he was surprised but was still smiling. She was unable to get closer to him. Ameridan seemed to be in the same situation. Neither could get closer or get a good look at the other.

“Well then, Inquisitor. It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m surprised they chose a new Inquisitor so fast.”

“Ser-”

“Please, Ameridan is fine. Never liked all the titles and everything. I honestly never even wanted the job.”

A wave of relief came over her. She wasn’t alone in wishing someone else could have been picked? “Good to know I’m not the only one. I was only asked to do so because of this.” She held up the Anchor so he could see. 

“I doubt that is the only reason. A magic hand is useful, but I have a feeling you were picked for more than that.” He replied as their connection began to waver. “It seems you’re waking. I look forward to our next conversation, Helia.” He gave her a reassuring smile.

Before she could respond, she woke up. Frustration welled inside her. She had been so close! If she had a little longer she could have asked him where he was! At least he seemed to be just as uncomfortable with their role as she was. She barely liked leadership, and she was supposed to have been her clan’s next Keeper! 

If anything, the job made her more exhausted than when she was out adventuring. She enjoyed meeting new people and seeing new places, but when doing so for official Inquisition business she put on the mask of Inquisitor Lavellan. Part of her was afraid that if Thedas knew that the Herald was really a naive Dalish Mage, they wouldn’t take the group so seriously. The only leader in the world who knew her true nature was Alistair, who also didn’t want his job.

And so she created the persona of Inquisitor Lavellan. A person who while merciful and understanding, was in no way a pushover or scared of her foes. Lavellan let her be free in a way- those who had never met her would see Helia and not once think she was the famous Mage. She was free to explore and talk to people without possible bias as Inquisitor. And seeing as she already was an oddity- a Dalish Mage traveling around with shems and dwarves was a strange sight for many- the opportunity to seem ordinary was a blessing.

“If you fall I’m the one who will have to explain to Cullen what happened! And we both know that will not go over well!” Dorian yelled from the ground. Helia, meanwhile, clung to the giant tree root she had walked out on. Cullen and Bull were busy back at camp while Sera was flirting with Harding. The two Mages had decided to go looking for herbs and metals nearby, and Helia had walked across the root bridge after spotting some rare plants. Her friend had warned her to not look down or even think about falling, which led to her looking down and realizing just how high up she was. In a panic, she nearly fell off, leading to their current predicament. She was on her stomach hugging the root for dear life and wasn’t about to stand. Her legs still felt like jelly and she knew if she stood up, she would fall.

“J-Just help me! Or else that will be the case!” She shouted back, face buried in the bark. She wasn’t even going to try looking up. That meant acknowledging she was stuck in the middle of the bridge. And that Dorian was right. “As much as I care about you, I do treasure not being a stain on the forest floor. Plus, I don’t do heights. I’ll go get Cullen-”

“ NO DON’T YOU DARE.”

He sighed and shook his head. The sound of crunching leaves caused him to turn and see a very worried, very angry Templar. “What did you two do?! Why aren’t you helping her?!”

“Cullen, this was entirely her idea and I did try to stop her. She insisted.” Dorian explained as the man began to carefully make his way across the bridge. The Ferelden carefully pried her from the tree and carried her to safety, scolding her gently for even doing something like that. “You could have gotten yourself killed. You realize that?”

Helia had her face buried in his chest from embarrassment and relief. She mumbled a reply, her ears red from embarrassment. “I love you too, dear.” He replied.

Chapter Text

To explain the confusion the group had upon discovering an ancient Tevintar structure so far south was impossible. Apparently they had expanded much further south than anyone had expected. Regardless, the Jaws of Hakkon had set up a small base inside and, after dealing with them, it was time to investigate.

Which, as per usual, caused even more confusion.

Before them stood a shrine to Andraste, but also Ghilan'nain. To see a shrine combining both the human religion of the Chant and the Elven pantheon was a first for everyone. Kenric was practically vibrating with excitement, while Helia appeared curious but relieved. Her belief in both Andraste and the Evanuris was shared by her predecessor. Or maybe his lover? She couldn’t be sure, but something in her said it was both of them. 

Cullen watched as she placed a hand on the shrine, gazing up at it. Andraste stood with arms outstretched, halla standing in her palms as she quietly prayed. His grip on the pommel of his sword loosened as the mage fell to her knees, whispering in Dalish. Rushing to her side, it was Sera who stopped him.

“Give ‘er a minute, yeah? I may not like all this Elfie shite, but I’ve been with Helia an’ that arsehole Solas long enough to pick up on some Dalish. She’s praying.” 

Seeing as Sera normally would have questioned what the fuck was going on and if Helia was possessed, everyone looked at her with a bit of shock and worry. “What? Can’t I respect my friend an’ her beliefs sometimes?!” The thief snapped, her cheeks red. Iron Bull chuckled and told her it was fine before herding the group outside, leaving Cullen and Helia alone. The Commander could still faintly hear the professor ramble on about the enormity of this discovery and that they must be on the right trail. Kneeling down next to his beloved, he only just caught the tail end of her prayer.

“ As you were raised up from mortal men to stand with our Creators, our Makers, so raise me up now to defend this world.”  

Silence.

“That was his prayer here, you know? I don’t understand how I know it, but I do. Just who he was referring to, Andraste or the Halla Mother, I’m not sure. But… Ameridan’s last prayer, the last time he reached out to the gods… it was here.” She whispered, eyes still locked on the statue. “Was he scared? Calm? We know he came here with three others- his lover, his best friend, and a dwarven alchemist-but were they here with him? Or, was he all alone at this point?” She finally looked at him, tears in her eyes. “Was this where he first became lonely in his quest? Where he knew he would never return home, to his people and his friend Drakkon? We know Telana had been injured and died in her sleep, so she likely didn’t join him in his final battle. And she didn’t mention the others, so… he was alone.” 

Cullen was silent, reaching over and wiping away a stray tear on her cheek. There was nothing he could say to comfort her or say she was incorrect. Telana had passed away on the island from a broken leg if the remains they discovered were correct. The notes and monument they found indicated that two others- one of the first Templars, a man named Haron (who had only recently become addicted to lyrium, a feeling Cullen knew oh to well), and a dwarven alchemist named Orinna- had joined them and likely perished as well. Drakkon was busy fighting off a Blight hundreds of miles away. No help was coming, and Ameridan was likely the only one left. 

Something Helia knew all too well.

She had shared with him her experience right after Haven was destroyed. Her fears that everyone assumed her dead and hadn’t stalled to look for her. That she had failed and they hadn’t escaped in time. That she would die all alone. Fears that resurfaced after she was kidnapped by Samson and Corix.  

Fears that Cullen knew all too well himself. 

“I need to find him, Cullen. I need to give him peace.”

“I know. We will.” Holding her close to him, he sent a silent prayer to Andraste that he kept his promise. Ameridan deserved to rest in peace, and if they failed to do that for him, Helia would never forgive herself.

Ameridan was waiting for her once again in her dreams. She had started to look forward to their nightly discussions in the dreamlike realm. The older Inquisitor was happy to talk with her, and being able to share her thoughts with him was relieving for her. Some things she kept bottled up even from Cullen in fear that no one would understand her.

Turns out Ameridan was the same way.

“When Drakkon asked me to lead the Inquisition, I accepted because we were friends.  I was hungry for adventure and glory then. But I do not regret my decision.”

“I agreed because… Because I felt like someone had to bring peace back. And to see the world. Sometimes I wonder if it was the right choice, but I ultimately wouldn’t change anything.”

He smiled and nodded. “Peace and truth are what the Inquisition strives for. That is what our predecessors fought for, and what we have fought to find.” He said before the frozen dragon groaned. Helia rubbed her arms as the room’s temperature dropped and Ameridan returned his focus on the beast. “Someone is trying to break down the barrier I created!”

“Foolish Inquisitor. Once my soul is freed from this unmoving body, I will make sure you and your successor never leave this place. The lowlands will know my fury.”

Helia stepped towards the dragon in defiance, causing it to chuckle . “You do carry the heart of a true warrior. I look forward to meeting you in combat, Mage. And your warrior. You know he prays to me every time he goes to battle? Regardless of what that foolish Avvar Gurd  says about him, he is a true warrior despite being born in the lowlands.”

Despite this being her enemy, she felt thankful for Hakkon’s words. A bit curious about the prayer part, but thankful. If the Avvar god of war was impressed with Cullen and saw him above the arrogant Jaws of Hakkon leader, then he certainly was living up to his ancestors. He was always so humble about his combat prowess, even when beating her in practice fights. “I look forward to facing you in battle as well, Hakkon Wintersbreath.” She replied before turning her focus to Ameridan. He was completely focused on the dragon, eyes closed as he muttered something under his breath.

“Ameridan I’ll save you. Just hold on a little longer!”

Chapter Text

Upon discovering Storvacker trapped, Cullen felt rage well up inside him. How dare the Jaws of Hakkon do this to a sacred animal?! Hold beasts were meant to be treated with the utmost respect! To capture one and torment it was disrespectful not only to the beast but to the spirits.

“Now, our Hold Beast was a mighty mountain lion. Once, it was injured in one of our hunters’ traps, and that hunter had to beg forgiveness from the lion not just for him, but for the entire hold.” Cullen’s grandfather spoke to the children gathered before him. “To injure a hold beast- even on accident- is an action worse than injuring someone in your hold. Doesn’t even need to be from your hold- all hold beasts are sacred.”

Mia hugged her toy nuggalope closer while Branson listened in awe. Personally, Cullen didn’t get his grandfather’s stories but enjoyed listening to them. Grandfather Amund had so many tales of his people, and frankly the only thing odd about the Avvar was that they didn’t believe in the Maker. But it was their gods Andraste prayed to first, so he was willing to give them some thought.

But the wellbeing of a hold resting on an animal? Now, that was ridiculous.

It no longer seemed ridiculous. Seeing as Red Lion Hold fell to the Blight shortly after their hold beast was rumored to have been found dead, Cullen was starting to believe his grandfather was right. Luckily Storvacker was fine other than a few cuts and was weak from lack of food. She wandered off once the fighting was finished, nuzzling Cullen briefly on her way. Bull laughed and commented that the bear seemed to like him, and Cullen didn’t try to correct him. 

She had given him her approval and recognized him as a true Avvar.

Now as the group set up a small camp in the swamp for the night, he reflected on that. The sun had set before they could find an Inquisition camp and Helia had wanted to explore the ruins more in the morning, so they had taken shelter in the ruins Storvacker had been kept in. Dorian pointed out that they appeared to be Ancient Imperium torture chambers, but Sera yelled at him for even mentioning that.

“The Imperium? Yes, there are a couple of ruins left by those northerners in the Basin, if I remember correctly. Course, I was only a boy when I last was there, so I could be wrong. There are rumors that Hakkon himself is sealed away somewhere in Stone-Bear Hold. Or a dragon gifted his powers over winter itself. Your grandmother thinks the rumors were referencing an Archdemon, but Hakkon is above that.”

“Why else would they seal a dragon away? Amund, unless you’ve seen it and know for a fact it's just an everyday dragon, I’m sticking with my theory.” His grandmother smacked the older man’s arm as she approached. “Ah, of course my beloved Lady. I’m still certain you are the Lady of the Sky incarnate.”

“Oh trust me, keep scaring our grandchildren and she will be coming to get your soul, you old fool.” While her words were harsh, a smile was on his grandmother’s face. They always teased each other like that.

“Cullen?”

A hand waved in front of his face, drawing him back to the present. His companions looked at him as though they were expecting something. “Uh, Sorry. What is it?” He asked, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“We were discussing battle plans. Stone-Bear Hold has agreed to join us against the Jaws of Hakkon, all that’s left is for Svarah Sun-Hair to give us her formal agreement.” Dorian explained in a tired tone. None of them had gotten much rest since they set off to find Storvaker, and the battle to free the bear had sapped the last of their strength. With the battle into the Jaws’ stronghold on the horizon, it was unlikely anyone would be getting much rest any time soon. Especially considering they only had a small window of time before the hostile Avvar restored the magical ice barrier preventing the Inquisition and its allies from entering. 

He shivered as he recalled the moment the barrier had been melted by the spires on the way to the stronghold. Something gripped at his heart with unrelenting cold for the briefest moment. His companions had suffered from this cold for longer, only now finally recovering. Sera had complained about how he was barely affected, only for Bull to point out that Cullen was a descendant of the Avvar and as such likely has a natural resistance to the cold.

“Cullen! Are you s-s-seriously not cold?!” Alistair managed out between chattering teeth. The two had gotten into trouble with one of the Chantry Sisters and as punishment were assigned night guard duty. Something that wouldn’t have been an issue if not for the snowfall that night.

Cullen shrugged in response to his friend’s question. “It’s not too cold out, Alistair.” He replied. He didn’t get why everyone acted like the cold was such a big deal. Sure, it was annoying, but Cullen and his siblings never seemed bothered much by the cold. They seemed to be in the minority.

“T-T-There are icicles forming under m-my nose!” The other boy squeaked, rubbing his nose in a futile attempt to keep warm. “Not to be m-mean, but you’re immune to t-t-the cold, Cullen.”

He opened his mouth to respond only for the door to open and a Templar ordering the two boys inside. Alistair rushed inside, but Cullen hesitated briefly before joining the other boy by the warm fire.

  There was something in that fortress that meant harm to everything they cared about should it escape. What scared him most was how familiar the feeling felt to him. How he knew what caused it despite not stepping a foot inside.

Hakkon Wintersbreath. 

Part of him wanted to just seal the fortress back up and forget about all this. Yet at the same time, they needed to find Ameridan. He had been missing for far too long. The man deserved to finally be laid to rest.

“Best bet is to overwhelm them in a battle outside the fortress. Draw them out so a smaller force could slip inside and stop whatever they are doing deep inside. Helia would be the leader of this smaller group, of course.” He looked at the elf as he finished his suggestion. Her eyes were closed and her nose scrunched up as she thought on his plan. “Only if you come with us.” She finally said, opening her eyes. She suddenly seemed exhausted, as though she had used up all of her energy. And to his surprise, her ears and nose were tinged with blue like when he found her in the snow all those months ago.

He hated remembering that night. When Haven was destroyed, he was certain his heart nearly shattered and at the time, he had no idea why. He had barely known this woman, and yet she had risked her life to help them. Helia had been willing to help out a group that she knew nothing about, a religion that had persecuted her people in the past, for nothing in exchange. He wouldn’t admit it at the time, but the Commander had not gone back to search for her only because she made him promise to protect everyone. 

Seeing her walk out of that blizzard, cold and injured but alive , Cullen’s heart had almost stopped. She had managed to surprise him once again, and when he held her in his arms and saw her frostbitten ears, for the first time he understood just how bad it could be.

How had she gotten frostbite out of nowhere?

Ever since figuring out how to contact Ameridan while she was awake, Helia had taken to reaching out just so he knew she didn’t give up. It was getting harder and harder to speak with him or even get through to where he was, however. Lately, it felt like she was underwater and didn’t seem to ever get closer to him in the chamber. She could see Hakkon slowly start moving- his eyes blinking, his chest moving with each breath, his tail twitching. The icy cold had once again begun to seep into her bones, and the most recent attempt had actually affected her physically. 

Helia had just barely convinced her friends that it was a trick of the light. Now in her tent, she was rubbing her ears in order to warm them up. No doubt Cullen had noticed the frostbitten ears and nose, but she couldn’t tell him the truth. She couldn’t tell any of them the truth.

The truth that Hakkon’s power was strengthening and was so close to being unleashed.

Chapter Text

The gate to the old Tevinter ruin was heavily guarded by members of the Jaws of Hakkon. As Avvar warriors (and Storvacker) took down any attackers, the small Inquisition group cut a path to the doorway leading further inside the fortress. Iron Bull and Sera opted to stay behind and help once they reached the entryway, and thus were replaced with Cassandra and Varric. The air, heavy with the cold, failed to hide just what was beyond the very doors before them. Already, everyone in the group minus Cullen was shivering and they hadn’t even opened the door!

As they pushed open the heavy doors, a blast of cold air hit them. Cullen simply shrugged it off and offered his cape to Helia. She gratefully accepted it, wrapping it around her shoulders before leading the way inside. He took up the rear, glancing around at the ice covered walls. Chanting could be heard further inside, indicating the ritual had begun. Veilfire braziers were spaced out down the hallway, providing spots of respite from the chilling cold around them. Dorian muttered something about bringing him to a very cold place while Cassandra wondered just what they were up against.

Helia, surprisingly, was silent. Marching herself through the crumbling ruins like she had been here many times before. This didn’t mean she was resistant against the cold, however. The group had stopped at one of the braziers to warm up before they continued onwards, and despite doing her best to hide it, the Inquisitor was practically freezing. Pulling her aside, Cullen urged her to go back.

“Please, my love, go back and join the others.”

“You and I both know that won’t be happening. I promised Ameridan I would save him, and that’s what I plan on doing.”

“Freezing to death before you can won’t do anyone any good! Every time I see you shivering or trying to warm your hands, I can’t help but recall the night we lost Haven.”

“I know, ma vhenan , I know. I just don’t want to fail and for Hakkon to get free.”

Sighing, he shook his head. He couldn’t change her mind. Taking her hands in his, he raised them to his lips and blew warm air into them. “Then let us help you. Please dear, I hate seeing you like this.”

She gave him a weak smile and nodded. “Alright Cullen. Let's hurry and do this so we can get warm.”

By the time the group reached the inner chamber, the ritual was almost complete. The frozen dragon was glowing as Harofsen continued to chant, transferring the god into him. As Cullen and Helia approached him, the man turned to face them, grinning as he transformed into a Revenant. 

“INQUISITOR! IT IS FINALLY TIME FOR ME TO SEE IF YOU ARE EVEN WORTHY TO STAND BEFORE ME!”

Gripping her staff, she charged towards him. Cullen tried to keep an eye on the battle, but was distracted by enemies Gunderson had summoned. Icy winds kept putting out the braziers where they fought by and needed to keep warm. He quickly found himself the only one fighting away from a brazier, his allies restricted to the fires as the room froze over. The Revenant laughed, stalking towards him.

“SO, THE HALF-BREED LOWLANDER IS THE ONLY ONE ABLE TO RESIST THE COLD. HOPEFULLY YOU PUT UP A GOOD FIGHT!”

Readying his blade, the former Templar stared defiantly at the possessed man before charging into battle. Swords clashed as the duo fought, the remaining descendants of the Red Lion Hold. Gurd managed to cut his arm when he dodged a swing to his head, and for the first time in Cullen’s life, he was cold. The feeling started at the cut but quickly spread up his arm. He had to end this quickly before it consumed him.

If it hadn’t been for Helia, the ice likely would have. 

Gurd was distracted by a fireball to the back, finally allowing Cullen a chance to attack. With a solid swing, he took the Avvar’s head clean off.

When the battle finished, stone steps appeared around the center pillar, almost as though they beckoned them to the figure atop it. 

It was finally time to meet Ameridan.

Chapter Text

By the time the group reached the inner chamber, the ritual was almost complete. The frozen dragon was glowing as Harofsen continued to chant, transferring the god into him. As Cullen and Helia approached him, the man turned to face them, grinning as he transformed into a Revenant. 

“INQUISITOR! IT IS FINALLY TIME FOR ME TO SEE IF YOU ARE EVEN WORTHY TO STAND BEFORE ME!”

Gripping her staff, she charged towards him. Cullen tried to keep an eye on the battle, but was distracted by enemies Gunderson had summoned. Icy winds kept putting out the braziers where they fought by and needed to keep warm. He quickly found himself the only one fighting away from a brazier, his allies restricted to the fires as the room froze over. The Revenant laughed, stalking towards him.

“SO, THE HALF-BREED LOWLANDER IS THE ONLY ONE ABLE TO RESIST THE COLD. HOPEFULLY YOU PUT UP A GOOD FIGHT!”

Readying his blade, the former Templar stared defiantly at the possessed man before charging into battle. Swords clashed as the duo fought, the remaining descendants of the Red Lion Hold. Gurd managed to cut his arm when he dodged a swing to his head, and for the first time in Cullen’s life, he was cold. The feeling started at the cut but quickly spread up his arm. He had to end this quickly before it consumed him.

If it hadn’t been for Helia, the ice likely would have. 

Gurd was distracted by a fireball to the back, finally allowing Cullen a chance to attack. With a solid swing, he took the Avvar’s head clean off.

When the battle finished, stone steps appeared around the center pillar, almost as though they beckoned them to the figure atop it. 

It was finally time to meet Ameridan.

When she had last spoken with her predecessor, Helia had been warned that the seal was close to breaking. Even without the Jaws interfering with the ancient magic, Hakkon was close to breaking free. Now, rushing up the stone steps, she could only hope she wasn’t too late. 

Kneeling atop the pedestal was Ameridan, still gripping his staff so tightly his knuckles were white. Pointed ears were beginning to turn blue much to the group’s surprise. While they had known the older Inquisitor was a mage due to Helia’s dream meetings (“He has a staff! And was casting a spell- Ameridan’s a mage! Like me!”) there were no clues pointing to him being an Elf. The symbol of the Elven God Dirthamen was delicately tattooed on his face while his dark grey hair was pulled back off his face. Piercing greyish-green eyes opened and he turned his head, giving a faint smile upon seeing Helia.

“Ah, it’s good to finally meet you in person.”

The two Inquisitors stared at each other silently for a moment before the younger mage ran and hugged him, tears already streaming down her face. Cullen simply watched as the duo held one another, clearing his throat after a minute or two. Ameridan glanced up at him, giving a faint smile. “Ah, please forgive me. I am Ameridan, leader of the Seekers and the Inquisition.”

“W-We know.” Cassandra squeaked, truly in awe of her order’s founder. No one had assumed they’d actually find him alive and well. A spirit maybe, but a living, breathing person? Not in their wildest dreams. Cullen was a bit nervous as to just how he had survived for so long- was he possessed? Was this an illusion?

“Then I take it you are the members of the current Inquisition and the companions of my successor. She mentioned a variety of allies, but I did not expect they would mirror my own so much.”

Helia smiled and nodded. “Hey, don’t fix what’s not broken, right?” Ameridan chuckled, nodding in agreement. “You are correct. But breaking things is part of the job description.” She laughed and nodded, turning to Cullen. “Right! Ameridan, this is Cullen Rutherford, Commander of Inquisition forces. And my lover. In more than one way” 

Cullen quickly became flustered, and Ameridan enjoyed watching the couple discuss her rather blunt delivery. He was happy for his successor, but had a few questions. Particularly, about how despite being told the Fereldan was a former Templar, he could sense no lyrium-enhanced abilities coming from him. And how an Avaar had ended up in the Chantry. They had been polite when he had encountered them, but Stone-Bear’s thane had made it clear that Drakon and the Chantry held no power over them. At least the thane had been pleased to hear that due to Andraste’s connections to the Avaar they would be spared from the influence of the empire or Chantry. Then there was the making sure this man felt the same towards Helia as she felt for him- he had seen too many broken hearted elves whose human lovers ended up leaving them for another human. Helia didn’t deserve that fate. 

“Ser Cullen, may I ask how an Avaar became a Templar? Most do not even go to the lowlands unless necessary.”

“Oh, my grandfather was an Avaar. I am from Fereldan.”

Fereldan? That made much more sense. The man reminded him so much of Haron it hurt. His best friend, who refused to let Ameridan go to the basin alone, only to quickly start suffering from lyrium withdrawal. This Templar was without lyrium and thriving according to Helia. Such a feat was impressive.

“Ser Ameridan-”

“Just Ameridan, please.”

“Ameridan, I want you to know that Helia has told us much about you. She hasn’t stopped until we found you.”

The way Cullen looked at Helia as he spoke quelled the older elf’s fears. The love and affection in his gaze was proof enough that he loved Helia more than anything. He wasn’t going to leave her side. 

The room shaking drew Ameridan from his thoughts and back to the issue at hand. Right. Hakkon was still a threat. They had to focus. “We can talk later. Let’s deal with the issue at hand first.” He said, receiving nods from the group. As the dragon broke free from the spell, it no longer had one Inquisitor to deal with- but two. Letting out a roar, it ignored them and instead took off, tearing a hole in the ceiling as it escaped.

“After it!”

The group made to charge out after it, but froze when Ameridan fell to his knees. “Ameridan! Are you alright?!” Helia questioned, feeling tears begin to roll down her face as he looked up with a sad smile. 

No.

This couldn’t be happening. They were doing this together, like they promised!

“I fear time… time is catching up to me. My body is failing me.” 

She wrapped her arms around him and held him tightly, hoping that maybe if she held on, he wouldn’t go. “I’m sorry, my dear Helia, but it is my time. Telana is waiting for me, and I’ve kept her waiting long enough. Know I will always be with you, Inquisitor.”

His body faded into nothingness, leaving behind a set of armor similar to his own. The remaining Inquisitor let out a sorrowful wail as sobs racked her tiny form. The others stood in silence, mourning the death of the person they searched so long to find. Cullen didn’t want to disturb his beloved, but knew they needed to go before the cold overtook all of them, even him. They had to stop Hakkon before he made it out of the Basin and into Southern Thedas. 

Gently, he helped her to her feet, pulling her close to him before guiding her and the others to the exit. By the time they left the ruins, Helia’s sobs had become sorrowful sniffles and hiccups, her eyes red from tears. But regardless of how much she wanted to curl up and cry even more, she instead turned her gaze to the sky and the shadowy figure of a dragon fleeing the scene. Cullen watched as she marched into a nearby tent set up for the party and exited a few moments later donning the golden Dragon Hunter’s armor her predecessor had left as a gift. 

“We have a dragon to stop.”

Chapter Text

Sup guys!

I'm still working on The Lion and the Halla. In fact, I made some small edits and added to some of the earlier chapters!

I've been dealing with writer's block and life (job, normal chaos, etc). But! To hopefully combat it, I started a small fic based on the let's Go Camping! chapters! The basis is on what if instead of Helia being attacked by Red Templars, it's Cullen and co. who get into deep shit? What would happen then? Especially when a feral mage, a former slave, and a Warden roll up to Skyhold to see if their resident Champion is alright?

I'm also working on mini headcanons over on my tumblr derpyfangirl, and am open to accepting prompts for mini drabbles based on our favorite Lion of Fereldan and Inquisitor, alongside disaster trio from Kirkwall and Fereldan Wardens who share a single braincell, and the relationships between the Inquisition's members! I'll probably compile those into a collection that will be part of this seires lol

And to hopefully tide everyone until I finish the next chapter, a little preview:

Finding the frost dragon wasn’t hard. They simply had to follow the trail of destruction it had left in its wake. What was hard was ignoring how Helia had forced her feelings down. She instead had reverted to her Inquisitor persona, but a much more emotionless version- it was like she was simply going through the motions of her duties. Her eyes were still red from crying and despite her attempts the occasional sniffle came from her. Regardless, she was set on her goal and even the stray Jaw of Hakkon warrior was not standing in her way. Cullen almost felt sorry for them. Almost.

He was concerned about his arm however. Ever since the possessed Gunderson had managed to cut him during their battle, the icy cold feeling had spread up his arm. A feeling he had never felt before, he was a little intrigued by it, but the biting cold and burning from the cut told him this was very, very bad. If they didn’t stop Hakkon fast, he wouldn’t survive to see tomorrow. Dorian had noticed this, and had offered to do whatever he could to hopefully delay his friend freezing to death, but there wasn’t much they could do. The chill was magical in nature, and only by defeating the source could he be healed.

Do I enjoy torturing our resident former Templar? Yes. Do I also love said former Templar and writing fluffy fluff for him? Also yes.

Till next chapter, bye!

Chapter Text

Finding the frost dragon wasn’t hard. They simply had to follow the trail of destruction it had left in its wake. What was hard was ignoring how Helia had forced her feelings down. She instead had reverted to her Inquisitor persona, but a much more emotionless version- it was like she was simply going through the motions of her duties. Her eyes were still red from crying and despite her attempts the occasional sniffle came from her. Regardless, she was set on her goal and even the stray Jaw of Hakkon warrior was not standing in her way. Cullen almost felt sorry for them. Almost.

He was concerned about his arm however. Ever since the possessed Gunderson had managed to cut him during their battle, the icy cold feeling had spread up his arm. A feeling he had never felt before, he was a little intrigued by it, but the biting cold and burning from the cut told him this was very, very bad. If they didn’t stop Hakkon fast, he wouldn’t survive to see tomorrow. Dorian had noticed this, and had offered to do whatever he could to hopefully delay his friend freezing to death, but there wasn’t much they could do. The chill was magical in nature, and only by defeating the source could he be healed.

Of course, the source of this magic just had to be a giant dragon possessed by an Avaar god.

Helia somehow hadn’t yet noticed, or if she had, wasn't mentioning it. Her mind was still on Ameridan and their task at hand. Cullen couldn’t give her another reason to worry-

He screamed as the icy cold surged further into his body. It felt like he was burning alive. The rest of the group stopped and moved to help him as he fell to his knees, clutching his arm. Helia was by his side in an instant, tearing off the armor on his arm to look at the wound only to bite back a scream herself. Despite only being cut an hour ago, the slash appeared infected already. But what caught everyone’s attention was how pale his arm had become. His veins stood out against his skin like blueish branches, and his skin was freezing to the touch. A thin layer of frost was forming around the edges of the cut, slowly inching further up and down his arm. Each time he gasped for air, his breath came out in puffs of cold clouds, and his cheeks were reddened from his low body temperature. 

Cullen was struggling to rip off his armor and clothes. He was so hot! Why were they stopping him?! “He’s suffering from hypothermia! Don’t let him undress!” Cassandra ordered, fear lacing her voice. “How is it so severe already?!” Varric asked before the Inquisitor ordered him to go get Iron Bull.

“He should be at the closest camp with Sera! Bring him and a healer back here immediately!” Helia barked as she quickly put together a campfire. Rubbing his hands, she helped him to the fire, using magic to warm him up the best she could. 

It could have only been a few minutes when Storvaker came barreling towards them, heading straight to Cullen’s side. She growled at the Inquisitor in a way that came off as ‘What happened to my cub?!’

Seeing as she had encountered stranger things, Helia proceeded to answer the bear. “He was cut by a man possessed by Hakkon. He seemed fine up until a few minutes ago.”

‘He is freezing to death. My cub is freezing from the inside!’

“What?! Wait, how am I talking to a bear?!” 

The bear simply stared back. ‘My dear Helia, the Veil is thin here. This bear and I both favor the Lion of Fereldan.’

She nearly fainted. Cullen had mentioned his strange dreams where he was referred to as such. But, that meant…

“Ghilan'nain?!” She squeaked, immediately bowing before Storvaker. “I apologize for not honoring you properly! Lady Ghilan'nain, it is an honor to speak with you!” She managed out. The bear made a noise of contentment as it rubbed against Cullen. ‘Indeed. The Veil is very thin here in the Basin. My little one, there is no need for formalities. I came here to help one of my children and my chosen Champion.’ Storvaker nuzzled her hand before continuing.

‘To save my cub- my Champion- your beloved- you must slay Hakkon. The ice is freezing him from the inside. Unless Hakkon is freed from his mortal vessel or takes the Lion as his vessel, he will die. I shall do what I can to delay the cold, but you must hurry, Little One.’ She looked over at the approaching Iron Bull and nudged her towards him. 

‘Go. I will keep him safe.’ The bear watched as the Inquisitor nodded and gave Cullen a kiss on his forehead before rushing off.

"Hakkon Wintersbreath! For your plans of attacking the lowlands and causing death and destruction to both Orlais and Fereldan, I have come to release your spirit from this earthly vessel you possess! I am Inquisitor Helia Lavellan, and I come to finish what Inquisitor Ameridan began!" Helia declared, standing before the dragon. The Avvar god let out a laugh, circling the woman. “SO, YOU COME TO FIGHT ME AS HE ONCE DID? YOU WILL FAIL JUST AS HE DID! AND WHAT OF YOUR AVVAR LOWLANDER? WHY HAS HE NOT COME TO FIGHT ME HIMSELF?” 

“You know exactly why! One of your weapons cut him!” She shot back, the Anchor sparking with energy. “AH, SO A NEW VESSEL MORE SUITABLE THAN THAT FOOLISH THANE. BUT BEFORE THAT, I WILL END YOU JUST LIKE I DID AMERIDAN!”

“If you think I’ll let either of those things happen, you are mistaken!”

Raising her staff, Helia charged into battle, knowing Ameridan was by her side.

Storvaker looked up as a gust of cold wind buffeted her and a spirit crossed back over the Veil. Knowing Hakkon had been defeated, she turned back to her cub. Cullen had begun to warm up again, color starting to return to his cheeks. She licked his face and hair, trying to warm him up faster. She let out a happy grunt as he began to stir, opening his eyes only to be face to face with a bear. Crying out in surprise, he scrambled back, wincing as he put pressure on his arm. Looking at the bandages, he noticed that he no longer felt piercing, icy pain radiating from the cut underneath. “What…” He whispered, touching his arm and feeling warmth under his skin. He no longer felt any cold, so it seemed he was back to normal. 

Shouting alerted both the man and the bear to the return of the Inquisitor and her party. Using Storvaker as support, he got to his feet and made his way towards the crowd, Inquisition soldiers and Avvar moving to make a path. Helia had her back to him, giving Thane Sun-hair a run down of what had happened. Catching the tail end of the conversation, he chose to remain silent. “... and Hakkon was freed from a mortal vessel. You shouldn’t have any more trouble with him directly.” She concluded, noticing Svarah smiling at something behind her and turning around. Finally seeing Cullen, she grinned and ran over to hug him, resting her head against his chest. “You’re alive…” She whispered, more to reassure herself than anything. He kissed the top of her head, smiling down at her. “Because of you, I am.” He whispered back, his smile growing as she looked up at him. Her eyes still held some sadness in them and her smile turned bittersweet. “I finished his mission, Cullen. I just wish he was here to see it.” 

He wiped away tears forming in her eye. “He was. I didn’t get to know him like you did, but I know he was by your side. Ameridan is no doubt proud of you.” The elf was silent and he feared he had said the wrong thing. That was until she kissed him, giving him a thankful grin. “Thank you, my knight. Thank you.”