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He sat in his living room anxiously waiting as he had been for the last half hour. Louis was supposed to arrive 30 minutes ago. He had cooked his favorite meal and an elaborate dessert. Tonight was gonna be the night he was going to tell Louis he loved him. They had been dating for almost 2 months and he wasn't sure if it might be too soon but he didn’t care, he needed to tell him. He was sitting waiting nervously on edge, what if Louis had left without telling him, what if Louis didn’t want him anymore. He was broke out of these thoughts with the ring of his phone. It was Louis. He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding in. He was probably just running late, he was calling to apologize and say he would be there in a few. He answered the phone after 2 rings. “Hey Love, you okay?”
The line was silent until it wasn’t “Hello is this Mr.Styles'' an unknown female voice questioned.
He confusingly answered, “yes this he, Harry Styles why do you have my boyfriend’s phone?”
“Mr.Styles you were the emergency contact for Mr.Tomlinson''.
Harry internally laughed remembering when a few weeks ago someone referred to Louis as Mr.Tomlinson. He later ranted to Harry about how he felt so old when people called him that. He then realized the woman was still talking and refocused on her words
“Mr.Styles I am incredibly sorry but Mr.Tomlinson was in an accident…”
The woman continued to talk, telling Harry about Louis’s condition but he couldn’t hear a word of what she was saying. He was gonna tell him he loved him and now what if he doesn’t get the chance god he was so stupid he should have told him weeks ago. He was gonna tell him weeks ago but when he told Niall, Niall told him to wait, it was too soon.
He was brought out his spiraling thoughts by the woman “Mr. Styles… Harry, I know this is a lot to take in but he should be okay. He will be going into surgery within the hour barring any complications he should be okay.”
Harry stayed silent for a few seconds, then realizing he needed one more piece of information “Um… uh… okay where is he? I-i-i need to be there. He can’t be alone. Can I be there? Please.”
“Of course Mr.Styles he is at The Royal London Hospital. He will probably be in surgery by the time you arrive but you can see him when he is out. When you get here, ask for Dr.Drum and I will come out and update you.”
“Okay um I will be there soon I don’t think I should drive so I have to call a friend but I will be there soon um thank you bye.” And with that, he hung up and immediately called the group chat with Niall and louis’ 2 friends Zayn and Liam.
They all answered fairly quickly, Niall was the first to talk “Hey Haz why are you calling. I thought you were having dinner with Lou. Is everything okay?” Harry sat not ready to say what happened out loud.
Zayn was the next to speak up “Harry what happened is everything okay? You usually aren’t this quiet”.
Harry knew he needed to tell them. He let out a sniffle now realizing he has been crying not sure when it started. “Um, I just got off the phone with The Royal London Hospital. Um, Lou was in an accident. I'm not quite sure what happened but he needs surgery and I need to go to the hospital but I don't think I should drive. So um could one of you come to get me.” There was a long period of silence trying to process what was said.
Liam was the first to break the silence “Okay Harry since Niall is closest to yours he will pick you up and me and Zayn will meet you there okay.” Niall and Zayn both agreed.
Harry hung up immediately after, not responding to Liam knowing that Niall was probably already out the door headed to him. Harry sat on the couch in the same place he started when waiting for Lou before he knew what happened, but this time instead of being nervous he felt sick to his stomach, tears staining his cheeks, eyes red-rimmed and puffy, not knowing what to do, at that moment or if Louis didn’t... Right at that moment, his front door opened wide and Niall ran to his side. Immediately pulling him into a tight hug not caring that his shirt was now probably stained with tears and snot. They stood like that for seconds, minutes, hours, he had no clue, time was no longer relevant to him. The love of his life was probably being cut open. And with that thought, he rushed into the bathroom and threw up. Niall ran after him face full of worry but stayed silent knowing that talking wouldn't help.
Harry got up and walked to his room stripping out of his skinny jeans and silk button-up shirt throwing on the sweats Louis had left and one of Louis' favorite sweatshirts to steal, both still smelling of that beautifully overwhelming smell of the boy he loves. After changing his clothes he walked to the living room grabbing his phone and walking out his front door. Too stuck in his thoughts to acknowledge Niall. They both walked to the car and got in in silence. The entire drive to the hospital was filled with silence and occasional sniffles.
Liam and Zayn pulled into the parking lot only seconds After Harry and Niall. After parking, Liam and Zayn rushed to Harry's car door enveloping him in a tight hug as soon as he got out. They stood in the hug for a few minutes before walking into the hospital.
Harry immediately walked to the front desk asking if he could talk to Dr.Drum hoping that she would have good news for him. The older woman at the desk told him to take a seat in the waiting room and that Dr.Drum would be out as soon as possible. The three boys lead him to a corner of the waiting room to wait for the doctor.
After waiting for about 5 minutes a tall woman in dark blue scrubs, hair up in a messy bun walked through the double doors and called for Harry. Harry immediately stood up and walked over to her. His eyes still puffy and red but tears were no longer streaming from his eyes. He no longer had the energy to cry, he was no longer sad, just numb.
As soon as he stood in front of the woman he barely knew she enveloped him in a hug, after a few seconds she pulled away. “Sorry if I overstepped you look like you need a hug”
“No it’s fine I did” he responded, numb feelings apparent in his tone. Dr.Drum then asked them to take a seat and she would talk them through what has happened and what will happen. Harry was too numb to focus on her words. He still had no clue what had happened. He knew that Louis broke his left leg, a few ribs and he was having surgery cause they found blood in his belly. Beyond that, he had no clue what was happening.
Seconds after she finished explaining everything her pager started going off. She looked at it, then looked at Harry with concern in her eyes and immediately stood up and walked away without another word. This sent Harry into a panic; he knew she was being paged away because of Louis and from the look on her face it wasn’t good. His mind started spiraling. “I love him. He's the love of my life. I’ve never loved a boy this way before. Before him I knew I liked boys and girls, I had dated a few boys before but never long and I never felt like this towards them. I haven't told him yet. I-i was gonna tell him tonight after dessert. I was gonna tell him. Tell him I love Him. But I didn’t. He never came. I thought he left me. But he didn't. And now. What if i don't get the chance. I was gonna tell him weeks ago. I was gonna tell him. But it was too soon. I didn't tell him. And now I might not get the chance.” He mumbled no longer feeling numb he was feeling everything, so much pain. He didn’t know what to do other than cry, he sat there with his head in his hands sobbing not caring who heard or saw.
The boys weren’t sure if Harry meant for them to hear his words of panic but they did. They looked at each other than curled in on Harry hoping this would help not knowing what else to do. They sat like that surrounding Harry for hours until Harry fell asleep on Niall's shoulder.
Once they realized that Harry had fallen asleep, Zayn and Liam backed away sitting back in their chairs. Liam rested his head on Zayn's shoulder and fell asleep.
After about half an hour the double doors opened and it was the doctor, Dr.Drum. Niall immediately shook Harry awake and Zayn did the same with Liam. Harry was slow to wake up he had forgotten about reality but as soon as he saw the doctor he was wide awake unsure of whether this was gonna turn into more of a nightmare.
Dr.Drum stood in front of him and finally said “The surgery is over, we stopped the bleeding in his belly”. He could breathe again and everything was gonna be okay. But it wasn’t over she had more “in surgery his heart stopped”. his heart dropped. “We were able to start his heart again but we are worried his brain was oxygen deprived for too long.” Harry's head started to spin he had so many questions.
But before he could speak Zayn spoke up “what does this mean?”
“It means there is a possibility he won’t wake up”
This time harry responded “You mean a coma? Is he stuck in a coma?”
“It is a possibility, yes. Tomorrow we will get new MRI and CT scans of his brain and have a better idea of whether or not he's in a coma.”
Harry stood there silently taking in what he was told. His boyfriend may never wake up. At this moment in time, he was so grateful to have the friends he does. He didn’t think he could say anything without crumbling to the floor. Thankfully he didn't have to worry about that because Niall spoke “Can we see him? I know he's not awake but can Haz at least see him?”
“Yes of course, does he have any other family that should be called?” Harry broke. He forgot about Louis’ mum and sisters, he should have called them, he felt so selfish for not thinking about them.
As Harry was crouched on the floor with Niall rubbing his back he heard Liam speak up “I already called his mother and she said she would be here in the morning.” Oh, thank god for Liam. Harry knew he wouldn't have been able to let a nurse or doctor call Jay. He would have had to do it, and no one wants to be the one to tell your boyfriend's mother that he may not wake up. Knowing that no one needed to be called the doctor led Harry and his friends to Louis’ room.
Once they were just outside of Louis’ room Dr.Drum stopped to prepare the boys for what they would see. “I need you to prepare yourselves. He is going to have lots of cords and tubes and machines around him but you can hold his hand and whatnot.” and with that, she opened the door revealing the boy with blue eyes to the other four boys.
Harry immediately rushed to his bedside grabbing hold of the small frail-looking boy, new tears running down his cheeks as he whispered the 3 words he was going to tell him hours ago, over and over again, praying to whatever gods are listening that his boy will wake up.
Niall, Liam, and Zayn stood in the door watching the green-eyed boy for a few seconds until the doctor turned towards the other 3 “If any of you need anything please let me or one of the nurses know”.
The three boys then thanked Dr.Drum and walked to stand by their 2 friends. The 4 boys sat in the room in silence, none brave enough to say a word. Zayn and Liam had curled up on the couch together, Niall on the reclining chair, and Harry snug against Louis’s side.
Liam, Niall, and Zayn dozed off after several minutes but Harry could not seem to fall asleep. He laid there by Louis’ side awake worried that if he fell asleep Louis would either wake up alone or that Louis would no longer just be in a coma. But dead. So he laid there by his side awake all night.
When the clock hit 6 am a nurse walked in to check on Louis’ vitals and informed Harry that in three hours he would be taken for new scans. With that Harry decided it was time he should call Jay knowing that she was probably already on the road. He grabbed his phone from the bedside table and stood up out of the bed to step out into the hallway. Once he was out of the room he opened his phone and pressed on Jay's number. His phone rang for a few seconds before the sweet sound of Jay's voice flowed through the speaker “Hi Harry I was waiting for your call. I'm so sorry I'm not there but I'm about an hour out how are you holding up?”
“Hi, Jay I’m so sorry I wasn't the one to call you yesterday. I don't know how much you know but um yesterday Louis was in an accident and he broke a leg, a few ribs and had bleeding in his belly. He went into surgery yesterday and um d-d-during surgery his um h-heart stopped. They think his brain might have been deprived of oxygen for too long and they think he might be s-stuck in a coma. But they are gonna take him for new scans in a few hours so we will know more.”
“Harry thank you for taking such good care of my son but how are you? Louis has doctors and nurses looking after him but who is looking after you.”
“Jay I will be fine once I know he is fine.”
“I know Harry, please take care of yourself, maybe call Anne and have her come too. I will be there soon okay.”
“Yeah okay see you soon.”
“Bye Harry.'' and with that, he hung up the phone and decided to take Jay’s advice and call his mum.
Anne didn’t answer quite as quickly as Jay but she did. “Mum can you come to London'' he asked in a shaky voice before she could say hi.
“Of course baby is everything okay” as soon as he heard his mum’s voice he broke, sobbing.
“H-h-he might not w-w-wake up”
“who baby?”
“Lou h-h-his heart stopped in s-s-sur-surgery yesterday and I-i-i never told him I l-l-love him?”
“Oh baby I'm on my way and I promise you he knows. What hospital are you at?”
“Um, I think the Royal London hospital.”
“Okay baby I will be there in 45 minutes and Baby”
“Hmm”
“He knows” and with that, his mum ended the call.
Harry walked back into the room finding Liam and Zayn awake but Niall still snoring away. Of course, because he could sleep through a hurricane. After 15 minutes of listening to Niall snoring and the beep of the machines, Liam decided to break the nervous silence. “How about I run out and pick up some breakfast from the pancake place around the corner.” And of course, at the first mention of food Niall is wide awake. He can sleep through a hurricane but once food is mentioned he's awake.
Niall and Zayn agree that pancakes would be infinitely better than hospital food. Harry though wasn’t hungry, too nervous for what the scans would say. Niall and Zayn pull up an online menu to order not bothering to ask Harry knowing that he would say he's not hungry.
Ten minutes later Liam is gone to get food. Before Liam returns Anne walks through the door and engulfs Harry in a tight hug from behind. Harry not moving from Louis’ bedside even to hug his own mother.
Roughly 5 minutes after Anne arrived Liam returned with an arm full of food. Even though Harry didn't ask for anything Liam placed a cup of fresh fruit and a few pieces of bacon in front of him. As Zayn, Liam, and Niall ate their food Harry just stared at the food in front of him wondering if he would be able to keep down any substance. He hadn’t eaten anything since he got the call almost 12hrs ago. Eventually, Anne convinced Harry to eat something by threatening to shove it down his throat in a very loving tone.
Soon after Jay walked through the door giving everyone hugs before going to her son or Harry. After hugging everyone in the room. She walked up next to Harry and forced him to stand, engulfing him in yet another hug but this one said a thousand words the others didn't. It's okay, he's going to be okay, it's not your fault, he will be okay. Even though Louis and Harry had only been together a few months and known each other's families for less. Jay almost immediately felt like another mother to harry. Harry didn’t want that hug to end. He wanted to stay there forever, but eventually, Jay let go of Harry so she could check on her son.
As soon as he was out of the hug Harry started feeling the hunger, deciding to eat some of the fruit and bacon. Jay walked to the other side of the bed and whispered to her son words no one could hear. They then fell into another silence but this time it wasn’t as nervous and more comfortable.
After about an hour a nurse came in saying it was time to take Louis for his scans. Anne basically had to pry Harry from Louis’s side.
Once Louis was out of the room Harry got overwhelmed with the thought of what this scan would decide. If he would ever be able to look into those blue eyes that changed his life again. He couldn’t breathe, he let these thoughts overpower him and he collapsed in the middle of the room that the blue-eyed boy just left. He laid on the floor not moving a limb.
The others had left the room to follow Louis as far as they were allowed. Once they reached the room they panicked Harry was laying on the floor where he was standing only minutes ago. They rushed to his side while Jay called for help from a nurse. He was placed in a bed and given an I.V. of fluids. He had a mild concussion from falling to the floor but other than that he was fine, just dehydrated and sleep-deprived. He needed time to rest.
By the time he regained consciousness, Louis was back in the room and he was laying in a bed next to him, hand resting on Louis’ stomach, unsure whether he put it there or someone else.
As soon as the others heard a pained groan from Harry they sprang up from where they were sitting bombarding him with questions of concern but all he could think about was the boy next to him.
He sat for a few seconds not answering their questions before speaking with a sleep rough voice “Is he gonna come back? Is he gone?” The 5 surrounding him stopped talking and looked at him with sorrow tears immediately spilling out of his eyes.
Then Jay spoke, “They think he will be awake by the end of the day but-”. Harry let out a breath of relief before she continued speaking “Haz… Honey… If he wakes up he might not be the same. They are worried that his motor functions and speech might have been affected by the lack of oxygen.”
“But he's going to wake up he's gonna be okay.”
Anne then spoke “hopefully but they aren’t sure and he may not be able to speak or he might be paralyzed. It's going to be a lot.”
“I don’t care I can handle it as long as I can tell him, as long as he knows, I will never leave him if he allows me to stay.” By now everyone was in tears praying to whoever or whatever has the power that they allow blue to meet green once again.
At that very moment, a hand moved to sit over Harry's hand laying on Louis’ stomach but it wasn’t the hand of his mom or Jay or Niall or Liam or Zayn, no it was the hand of the boy who had been laying in the bed next to him, the hand of the boy with the blue eyes. Harry turned his head and was met with sleepy blue eyes staring back at him with tears in his eyes. The boy opens his mouth releasing a raw rough sound and winced. Jay immediately got up and grabbed a cup of water for her son, helping him take a sip and then engulfing him in a hug for several minutes.
Once Jay let go of her son he tried to talk again this time succeeding “I will never let you go, you are stuck with me forever.” he giggled. Harry was crying but for the first time in the last 16 hrs, they were happy tears.
He could talk, his boy could still talk. “I love you.” was the first thing he said he couldn’t wait any longer he needed to say it. “I have loved you since the day I met you and I haven’t stopped.”
Louis was now in tears. The boy with green eyes loved him. He was going to tell Harry he loved him after dinner but he kind of ended up in the hospital unconscious so he couldn’t but now the boy he loved said it. He loved him. They loved each other. “Harry that sounds awfully similar to the start of a proposal speech.'' He couldn’t help it, he's Louis after all he has to be sassy.
Harry hadn’t thought of it like that but if he was being honest he would if they weren’t currently sitting in hospital beds. “Hospital beds aren’t the ideal place for that but hey just wait.”
Louis laughed his boy just admitted that he would marry him basically right then and there “I love you too so much.” Louis said with a goofy grin. Then he went to sit up so he could kiss the boy next to him but he couldn’t move his legs. He could move his arms but he couldn’t move his legs, he panicked.
“Lou what’s wrong '' Harry saw the concern in the boy's face unsure what was going on in his head.
“I-i-i can’t move my legs, I-i-i can't move.” they had completely forgotten in the joy of Louis waking up and talking they forgot about his motor functions. He was paralyzed.
Zayn walked to Louis’ side “Lou when you were in surgery your heart stopped. The doctors feared you wouldn’t wake up. This morning they got new scans and well obviously you're awake but they worried you could be paralyzed.”
“s-so I won’t be able to walk again...”
At that moment the doctor walked in. “Hi Louis good to see you're awake, and yes you are correct we will run some more tests now that you are awake but it is possible that you are now a paraplegic.” Louis now had so many questions but his thoughts were interrupted by the doctor “Louis I know this is a lot to take in but let's take this one step at a time okay.”
“yeah yeah, you're right okay”.
At this the doctor looked over to harry “Hi Harry good to see you're with us too. How are you feeling? Any pain?” with this Louis looked over at Harry confused, what happened.
“Yeah I’m fine slight headache but I’m fine.”
“okay good well I will give you some time, some nurses will be in in an hour or so to take both of you for some more scans.” and with that, she left the room. Harry now looking over at Louis seeing his face full of confusion and concern.
Niall jumped in knowing that Harry wasn’t entirely sure of what happened to him either “Haz kinda passed out. He was sleep-deprived and slightly dehydrated and combined with the stress he well passed out. Nothing major they think he might have a minor concussion but that's it.” Louis was now more worried. He had been so focused on everything else he hadn’t even realized that Harry had an I.V. and was in a hospital bed.
“Lou im fine yeah nothing major okay I’m fine.”
“But you passed out because of me. You were so worried about me that you weren’t taking care of yourself. I didn’t even notice till the doctor asked.”
“Lou you have every reason to not notice. you were injured. you just found out you may never walk again. it's okay.” Harry then leaned over for the first time since his boyfriend had woken up and gave him a sweet short kiss. They were both going to be okay as long as they had each other. The seven of them sat in the room for the next hour talking about random things because they could.
Until several nurses filed into the room to take both Louis and Harry for their new scans. Once they were both returned to the room Dr.Drum walked in. “Harry, your condition is as expected a minor concussion. We are just going to keep you in a bed for a few more hours just to make sure and continue with the I.V hydration for a bit longer. And Louis, your scans did show that the part of your spine that affects leg function was oxygen-deprived for long enough that you will probably never walk again but everything else looks fine. we hope to discharge you by tomorrow.”
“Okay thank you for everything” Harry responded before the doctor turned and left the room.
“Lou you should probably stay with someone for a while till you get on your feet again.”
Before he could even process his words Harry blurted out “Move in with me. I mean if you want to. Come live with me. Not just till you get on your feet but like move in with me.”
“Haz I don't want you to have to take care of me or feel obligated to do this.”
“Lou we’ve been together for months. You have almost a full dresser at my house. We rarely spend more than 2 days apart just move in with me. I want to take care of you”
“I mean it's not a purpose but I suppose” Louis responded with a wide grin. This time when Harry leaned over to kiss Louis, Louis did his best to meet Harry halfway pulling him into a more heated kiss but still sweet.
“There are still other people in this room if you would please stay clothed” Niall joked at the scene in front of them. Harry and Louis broke away from their kiss in laughter, the room was filled with laughter.
After an hour Zayn and Liam left followed by Niall after a few minutes and then Anne and Jay to give the boys some privacy, promising to come back in the morning to help them home.
Now it was just Harry and Louis alone in the room for the first time since they both woke up. Harry had long left his bed and was cuddled up into Louis’ side, neither of them asleep nor talking, just enjoying the warmth of the person that they thought they may never see again.
Eventually, Louis broke the silence “Are you sure you want to do this. I mean I have no clue what I'm doing and I'm almost certain you don't either. it's going to be a lot and I understand if you want out I won't hate you I promise but I don't want you to resent me either.”
“Lou I have absolutely no clue what I’m doing but I know I want to find out with you. I could never resent you. if I walked away right now I would hate myself for the rest of my life. You are the love of my life. I want to take care of you till the day we are old and smelly and senile in an old person’s home. you are stuck with me I promise.” Louis didn't say anything, just planted his lips on those of the curly-headed boy that just said he was the love of his life hoping that the kiss conveyed the same words he couldn’t word. They sat in each other’s arms for the rest of the day till a nurse came in to take out Harry's I.V. and also to take the other bed knowing that it was going to be of no use to them.
Shortly after that, they both fell asleep to the beat of each other’s hearts, finally at peace. They didn’t wake up until another nurse came in to give them their dinner and check Louis’ vitals. confirming that he was doing good and should be good to leave by tomorrow afternoon. They ate in a comfortable silence occasionally laughing or shoving food in the other’s face. Once they finished eating they fell back to sleep in each other’s arms.
They didn’t wake up till the 3 idiots and their mothers returned around 10 am. They woke to the fond stares of their mothers and a bag of their favorite bagels and tea. They decided that Anne would drive both Harry and Louis back to Harry’s house once they were discharged. Niall, Zayn, and Liam would go to Louis’ to grab whatever he needed for the next few weeks. Jay was going to meet them all back at Harry's house after she picked her 4 daughters up at the train station. Louis was happy that he was going to see his sisters but also scared. He was now paralyzed what if people don’t look at him the same. Harry must have sensed Louis was worrying because he leaned over to kiss him on the forehead.
As the clock hit 2:45 a nurse walked in to check on Louis one last time. collecting the discharge papers they were given half an hour ago. A few minutes later a nurse walked into the room with a wheelchair helping Louis out of the bed and into the chair. On the way out of the hospital, they said their goodbyes and thank yous to Dr.Drum.
Once they were finally out of the hospital Louis smiled so big, he had missed the cool fresh air of spring. The nurse helped Louis get settled in the back seat of Anne’s car and showed them how to fold the chair to fit in the back of the car. Harry then sat in the back of the car next to Louis and Anne in the driver’s seat obviously. They had already said their goodbyes to Jay and the boys so all they had to do was get home. The drive home was nice. They talked about the nice weather and dinner plans.
Once they pulled into the driveway, Harry got out and unfolded the chair making his way over to Louis’ door. Once the door was open Harry tried his best to help Louis but he insisted he needed to learn to do it himself and he did but it took 10 minutes.
By the time Louis was out of the car and into his wheelchair Niall, Liam and Zayn had pulled up. Harry took Louis inside and helped him settle on the couch. while Anne and the boys grabbed Louis’s stuff from their cars.
Once everyone was inside Anne headed to the kitchen to assess what could be made for a late lunch and dinner. making note that she should go to the shops after dinner but for now, she made grilled cheese sandwiches for all the boys, Jay, and the girls knowing they would be there in 10-15 minutes.
While Anne was making lunch Louis was laying on the couch with his head in Harry's lap while Niall was sprawled on the floor and Liam and Zayn sharing the armchair. Louis had taken control of the TV which no one argued with and put on a football game. Once Anne had finished lunch she brought them out to the living room allowing them to claim their sandwiches.
A few seconds after they had grabbed their sandwiches the front door was opened and Louis braced himself for the 4 girls that were going to tackle him. As he had predicted the 4 girls immediately ran to Louis hugging him and kissing him, asking if he was okay. Until Jay told them to give him some space. Louis was now sitting upright on the couch with Harry on one side and his 4 sisters on the other as they ate their sandwiches and watched the game. Louis was surrounded by his best friends, the love of his life, his mom, Anne who felt just as much like his mom, and his four sisters. He had everything he needed. At this moment he no longer doubted whether he would be able to do this. He knew as long as he had his family he would be okay. everything would be okay.