Chapter Text
Scribbling lines in yet another set of paper, the boy at his desk sighed in exasperation. Confessing to the person he had a crush on for years was not the easiest task in the world, but that was what Midoriya Izuku had set out to do! Headstrong, brash, confident, spitfire- yes, he had fallen in love with the one, the only: Bakugou Katsuki, his childhood friend.
For years, Bakugou was just an untouchable figure, a beam of light that Midoriya aspired to be like. They had gone through rocky patches in their lives where Bakugou would push him around or mock him for his dreams- which definitely sounded harsh, but Midoriya didn’t hold it against him. Maybe that was just his own bias, but it was ultimately what led to their relationship getting better in high school.
While Bakugou still had a lot to apologize for- like the time he dunked one of Midoriya’s favorite
journals into the toilet and told him that “Becoming a mangaka is impossible when you can’t even draw. The only thing you’re good at is scribbling down your daydreams, and, even then, your writing is shit. Face it loser, the real world would tear you to shreds.”- he was doing a lot to help Midoriya better his writing. “Begrudgingly” he would proofread some of Midoriya’s short stories, since the freckled boy didn’t have the capacity to go through and edit his pieces; occasionally, he would even draw Midoriya’s characters to help inspire him to write more!
They had come a long way from just being two middle school kids strained by their shared dream- which was why Midoriya had hope for his confession letter, hope for them to be better and to get closer as partners and to connect in a way that friends didn’t. Of course, he was fully prepared for Bakugou to reject him, hoping that they could at least stay friends rather than strangers, but who could blame him for being hopeful?
Regardless, he couldn’t keep holding in how he felt. All he had to do was put a note in Bakugou’s locker asking him to come to the courtyard after school, and confess! Since he needed the confession to go smoothly, he planned on writing down a note that he could memorize, so that he didn’t fumble and screw up after finally getting his chance to confess his feelings. He already had a drawn up, ‘meet me,’ note, but he wanted to come up with a personal plan!
Letting out a sigh and severely doubting his writing capabilities, Midoriya pushed the letters aside, neatly packing up all of his writing materials. With his paper and pen packed up, the nerd flopped onto his bed. Years of fighting himself and his affection finally led to this! He couldn’t quite tell if it was a dream or a nightmare… So many times in the past he had thought of one day confessing the feelings he had harbored for Bakugou, but, every time, they went badly.
This time, though, he could fall sleeping knowing he had friends who supported him!
“I’m sorry, you’re going to what?” The response was a bit more harsh than he had expected, but Midoriya knew that his friends were just a little shocked! Really, who wouldn’t be, when he could barely shut up about how smitten he was for his childhood friend.
“I’m going to confess to Kacchan!” emerald eyes fluttered shut as he beamed, proud of his bravery.
“Are you sure this is a good idea, Dekukun?” Uraraka Ochako, one of Midoriya’s first friends since joining UA High School Of The Arts, spoke up first. She was a painting extraordinaire! Known for her paintings of clouds and space, she got into UA hoping to sell her paintings in the future to make money for her and her parents. She was one of the nicest and most romantic people Midoriya knew. There was a rumor that she had a huge crush on someone who made her want to be a better person, so she and Midoriya were the same! He had faith that at least she would understand.
“Of course! I mean, well, I am a bit worried, since I’m not quite sure how Kacchan feels about me, but, I mean,” he paused to fumble with his thumbs, “We’ve come so far now… You guys have seen it! He even helps me study and revises some of my writing! He’s been a huge help, and I really don’t know what I would do without him… I don’t want to risk losing that, but I feel like if I keep this in my chest much longer, I’ll burst…”
“Well, yeah, we’ve all been to your library study sessions now and again, kero. If you ask me, it just looks like he’s bullying you again… I don’t see how he’s all that helpful,” Asui Tsuyu was Uraraka’s friend first. They had met in a watercolor course, where Asui beautifully depicted ponds and other nature scenes to show her younger siblings. She was incredibly kind and empathetic; she was like a big sister to everyone around her! While she wasn’t known for having any crushes, she was known for how caring she was towards others.
“That’s just how Kacchan is, you know! He’s always so enthusiastic, but it’s so nice to feel it in person after he was so distant in middle school. I feel like I’ve been improving a lot with his help!”
“I fail to see how someone so rowdy is anywhere near a positive influence on you, Midoriya! I, for one, think you would be better off not associating with hooligans like that!” Iida Tenya, much like Uraraka, became friends with Midoriya when they met during the entrance exams. At first, he was scary, and there was one time where he ended up hunting a man infamous for injuring prestigious writers and artists- one of which happened to be Iida’s older brother, who was a law novelist. However, Iida had grown as a person from that experience. Thankfully, the police were willing to overlook the incident, or they could have gotten kicked out of UA. Regardless, Iida was a studious person and an amazing researcher! He had plans to go into the field of research, writing up reports and drawing out the details of history. Other than that one slip up, he was a very level headed person, who enforced the rules and helped round everyone up.
Thanks to him, they became closer to Todoroki Shouto, even if that was because his father was a police chief and played a big role in getting them out of being in trouble. Todoroki, himself, was dually enrolled in both writing and art classes. He was in Midoriya’s Intro to Painting class, saying how his father wanted him to be a successful writer like he was, but Todoroki detested his caustic influence on the family and decided to become an artist like his mother had always dreamed of.
Midoriya had told him to chase his own dream, because his talents were his own. If he wanted to become a writer, an artist, a mix of both- it was up to him, and, if he didn’t put his heart into it, his pieces would lack life.
Not that any of that had much to do with the conversation at hand.
“Kacchan isn’t a hooligan! He’s actually really studious, you know? I’ve never seen him miss a single piece of homework, and he still makes time to do such amazing artwork? I really admire that part about him,” Midoriya defended, yet again, starting to feel a little dejected about bringing up the topic.
“I’m proud of you, Midoriya,” to the untrained ear Todoroki spoke in his normal deadpan voice, but Midoriya was able to hear the honesty in his voice. His inability to read the room was both a curse and a blessing as he continued, “Do you have a plan for doing so?”
The other three at the table seemed to sour a bit when he asked that, but Midoriya was so excited to talk about his plan that he didn’t notice, “I do! I’m going to put a note in his shoe locker when we get to school, asking him to meet me after school today, and, when he shows up, I’ll confess in person!”
“Oh? You’re not just going to write him a note with your feelings and put it in his locker? Why confess in person?” Todoroki inquired, tilting his head slightly at the declaration. Of course, it made sense to just confess via letter, but Midoriya just nodded.
“I have a better chance if I confess in person! Kacchan is always telling me that I need more courage, and you know how straightforward he is-” it was Todoroki’s turn to nod at that, “At the very least, he’ll appreciate me taking the time to say my feelings out loud. Who knows? He might even be moved!”
The dual toned boy snorted, although it was barely audible, “Are you prepared for if he makes one of those ‘cute faces’ you’re always talking about?”
Midoriya immediately flushed at the thought, imagining Bakugou flustered by his actions. It was enough to make him flop down and hide his face between his arms, grumbling, “Please don’t tease me like that…”
“Don’t get your hopes up too high, Dekukun!” Uraraka sympathetically patted her friend on the back, “I’m sure Bakugou isn’t the type to do that. I can’t really see him taking your letter seriously to begin with,” she went on unhelpfully.
“Thank you for that, Uraraka. Crush my dreams, why don’t you?” Midoriya moved himself back up into a sitting position and rubbed his face.
“I’m just trying to be honest with you. We’ve all seen the damage Bakugou has done to you… I don’t want to see you get hurt,” the brunette pouted slightly, “What if he just uses that to bully you more?”
Midoriya looked fondly at his hands, smiling as he spoke, “Kacchan’s changed a lot since we were kids, but, even if that is the case, I’d still like for him to hear me out. That’s enough for me.”
“I don’t think Bakugou would bully Midoriya for his sexuality. A lot of his friends are gay, too,” Todoroki popped in. He and Midoriya were very clearly the closest to Bakugou. They started working together for a web comic competition that required a group effort. Midoriya brought it up first, convincing Bakugou and Todoroki to work with him.
Bakugou did the art, Midoriya did the dialogue, and Todoroki helped with the special effects and coloring. Unfortunately, they weren’t able to submit their work, since the project got out of hand. It just kept building and building until it was no longer a “short story,” but they had continued to work on it nonetheless.
“Still, be careful, Kero,” Asui warned, “I’ve seen what it’s like to get rejected. It’s not pretty, kero. I agree with Ochako: I don’t want you to get hurt, Midoriya.”
Breathing in deeply and smiling to his friends, Midoriya waved his hand, “You don’t have to worry about me! I know that Kacchan might not love me back, and this could mess up our friendship, but I have to do this…” His gaze softened as he looked down at the old All Might pencil in his hand, “I can’t keep hiding this from him.”
Iida was the first one to change the topic after that, discussing some of UA’s upcoming projects, and they were all able to talk about the pieces they were creating for the upcoming UA Arts Festival. Thankfully, the conversation flowed much easier after that, even if Midoriya felt awkwardly put down. He didn’t tell anyone that he planned on dedicating his piece to Bakugou or that he was hoping to ask the blond to accompany him to look around the Festival- assuming things went well after the confession.
After their daily breakfast at the local cafe, the squad crossed the street to go into the school. Midoriya looked around hesitantly before hurrying over to Bakugou’s shoe locker and opening the door. Thankfully, he wasn’t ridiculously early today, so his indoor shoes were still sitting nicely in the locker, meaning that he would definitely see the letter.
Once he did that, he figured all of his friends were off to their own classes already. Uraraka and Asui both started out their day with their watercolor class. Todoroki and Iida usually walked together since their nonfiction classes were next to each other; although Todoroki’s was Nonfiction As A Medium, and Iida’s was The Structure Of Research, they both had classes in the same part of the campus.
Changing his own shoes, Midoriya set out to class. He usually walked to class alone, anyway, since it was a class on Fictitious World Building and, obviously, in the fiction department, meaning that it wasn’t near his friend’s classes. He didn’t mind, though! Occasionally, he ran into Bakugou on the way over, since the blond was signed up for a Character Building class around the same time. Sometimes, they even ran into each other on the way to class! It was easy enough to avoid each other… assuming everything went wrong, but it was nice when they happened to meet!
Suddenly, a hand pushed Midoriya’s head so that he was looking at the ground. The forest haired boy almost took it as a threat until he heard a familiar laugh as the hand moved to ruffle and mess up his hair.
“What did I say about walking in front of me, Deku?” Bakugou Katsuki: the object of Midoriya’s affection and his long time childhood friend. He still spoke harshly, but, over the years, it had less and less malice. Now, it was just a convenient way to tease Midoriya.
“Good morning, Kacchan!” the forest haired boy beamed, raising his head to meet sparkling scarlet eyes that rolled uselessly in their sockets.
“Yeah, yeah, good morning to you, too, shitty nerd,” Bakugou dropped his hand, grinning down at his friend while they walked side by side, “Did you remember to do your fucking homework today?”
“I did!” Midoriya beamed as if he were a child bragging to a parent or a teacher, and not a high schooler showing off to his friend, “We were supposed to think about how little details often play a bigger part in the writing process, and we had to write up short paragraphs that gave little details about the characters or scenes we chose to portray!” Midoriya happily rambled.
“Yeah?” Bakugou goaded, grinning even wider as Midoriya’s body froze for a moment.
He completely deflated. The arms that were wildly gesturing to get his point across stopped moving as Midoriya was suddenly reminded who he was talking to, “But you already knew that, Kacchan… since you have the class, too…”
The blond laughed heartily, “Did you seriously forget that I take that class, too? Just because we don’t have them during the same time frame, stuupid,” he teased.
“Oh, come on, Kacchan! Give me a break!” Midoriya flushed with embarrassment, “It’s still too early in the morning for thinking…” He huffed, crossing his arms over his chest and avoiding Bakugou’s face. It was also too early to be reminded of just how gay he was.
Some people might mistake Bakugou as being rude- well, he was being rude, but being rude maliciously- when really that was just how he interacted with people. He still teased Midoriya, but it wasn’t like it used to be. It was lighthearted; it was fun banter between friends, and he wouldn’t give it up for the world.
“Psh. As if that matters, nerd,” Bakugou rolled his eyes, “I was going to say bring them with you after school. I’ll read them an’ see if they’re worth a shit. How’s that sound?” Midoriya felt his eyes light up at the thought. He loved sharing his work with Bakugou. It was like an unspoken love language- to share his personal thoughts and writings, and to listen as the blond gave him personalized tips that a decently large classroom just wasn’t able to offer. When it was just them in their little bubble, life seemed to be so much brighter.
“Really? You’d do that for me?”
“No, I’m just fucking with you. Cause I’m the type of guy who says shit he doesn’t fucking mean,” the blond deadpanned as well as one could when they had such a deep, almost raspy voice. Raspy didn’t quite cover it, no. His voice was solid, not like one that had been through strain, but it did have an alluring edge to it that made Midoriya want to listen to it all day.
“Bro, that’s not exactly the kind of thing you should say to someone you were an ass to for years.”
“Shut it, Shitty Hair! I’m not a fucking middle schooler any more. Deku knows that shit’s different!” It was still really nice to hear it out loud, but Bakugou wasn’t wrong. “Besides, I don’t joke about shit like that.”
Ruby eyes rolled over as the newest person fought back a smile, “Don’t I know that!” he laughed back, “I keep worrying that one day you’ll ditch our study sessions!” Red eyes, red hair, and a fiery passion that put both of those to shame: he was Kirishima Eijirou. Most of his classes were for advertising, and, boy, did he have the charisma needed. He and Midoriya shared a few classes, but Kirishima was close friends with Bakugou- one of his closest, actually.
It was a blessing and a curse some times. Kirishima was one of the nicest and friendliest people Midoriya knew! He had the drive and the tenacity to do anything he set his mind to, and his presence was super helpful in Bakugou’s life. The blond had explosive tendencies that led to friendship being difficult. Most of his popularity in middle school and before was solely due to his social standing. He was smart, athletic, talented, attractive- even as kids he was always the most confident person on the playground, but that also led to people befriending him just for his appearance and popularity.
For the longest time, he had nothing but fake, shallow friends, who only stuck around when he had something to offer or to look good standing next to him. People pushed their expectations onto him until he had the highest standards for himself, without thinking about how he felt. They accepted nothing less than the best- not his best, but the best- and it grew to the point where he wouldn’t accept anything less either. Then, when he held himself to such high standards, pushed aside people to focus on his goals, thought highly of himself, and accepted nothing less than the best from everyone around him to the point where he belittled people for not (working as hard) as him, people got mad at him for doing the things they had always told him to. When he got defensive, he was shamed. When he didn’t defend himself, he was mocked. When he was strong, people wanted him to be weak. When he was weak, people wanted him to be strong. If he wasn’t the best, he was the worst- just like they had told him. It was only natural that he developed a cutthroat relationship with other people and himself. He expected the people who stuck around him wanted something from him, that people who pointed out his flaws were planning to use them against him, and, when Midoriya didn’t have a clear advantage to being Bakugou’s friend, when he started to point out Bakugou’s flaws (by assuming that he needed help): Bakugou took that as a sign of aggression, since no one else had ever done that.
“I will if you don’t shut the fuck up,” the blond threatened, pointing at Kirishima. The two studied together, even. Back in middle school, Bakugou would just tell his lackeys that they were shit out of luck and needed to work harder- if they even had the drive to study at all.
Kirishima was one of the first friends that Bakugou had made since coming to UA. He helped the blond open up a lot and was honestly and genuinely impressed by the things that he did. He reminded Bakugou of how nice it felt to feel appreciated. He wasn’t afraid of Bakugou, and he stuck through even when shit got tough. It really helped the explosive artist to realize that not everyone was out to get him or only stayed with him for personal gain.
The redhead sighed exaggeratedly, “If you do that, I’m screwed!” He waved his arms, pouting before he looked over to Midoriya, “You’d help me, wouldn’t you, bro? If Bakugou abandoned me?”
On the other hand to all of the progress, Kirishima was arguably one of Midoriya’s biggest love rivals. Being so close to each other, he clearly meant a lot to Bakugou, and it didn’t help that Kirishima was open about the fact that he was gay.
“Good morning, Kirishima, and, yes, I’d help you study if Kacchan didn’t show up,” Midoriya still thought of the redhead as a friend, and he would even if the two had feelings for each other, “But I think Kacchan is just messing with you.” He couldn’t deny that they did have chemistry, and it would still make Bakugou happy. However, that didn’t deter the forest haired boy from his resolve to confess.
“Hah? The fuck are you to say anything, Shitty Deku! You probably talk to fucking fast for this idiot to understand a word you say. He’d be better off trying to read the shitty books the teacher gives him,” Bakugou rolled his eyes, unfazed. While he wasn’t right, he had a bit of a point. Midoriya had a bad habit of mumbling whenever he got too focused on a topic, and, really, the only person who could keep up with him at that point was Bakugou.
“I would not!” he still defended himself, though, even if Kirishima had laughed at that comment.
Being honest, it was a bit odd that Bakugou hadn’t brought up the note, especially since he was so terribly familiar with Midoriya’s handwriting. It didn’t seem to be in his pockets either- not that Midoriya made a habit of staring at the blond below the belt. That was just something that had dawned upon him after they went their separate ways. He was thankful that the blond wasn’t acting any different, despite probably having a suspicion of what was to come, though.
It was comforting to not fear losing his friendship with Bakugou, despite his troublesome feelings for the blond. Although, Bakugou was never one to worry about how others saw him. Either way, that gave Midoriya the confidence he needed to finish his note- even if he was only going to memorize it and fuck it up at the end of the day.
Regardless of that, Midoriya was shaking with nervousness as the day ended. He could feel dread seeping into his bones as he packed up after the last class. He was scared, he was excited, he was honestly feeling a little dizzy as the weight of realization sank into him: Midoriya Izuku was going to confess his love to Bakugou Katsuki after being in love with him for just about his entire life.
He made it to the courtyard as quickly as possible, watching the rest of the kids leave campus with their friends or getting picked up by their family members. Some of the clubs stayed behind, but, as far as he knew, Bakugou wasn’t in a club.
Just like that, he waited.
And waited.
And waited…
Then the club members went home, but Midoriya still waited.
And waited.
And waited…
But Bakugou was nowhere to be found. There weren’t any spikey blond locks anywhere. Midoriya even walked around the school, but there was no one else still waiting. He couldn’t believe it: Bakugou stood him up.