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"Perhaps I should buy this... it's 7 cents less and the design isn't an eyesore... But the other kind tastes nice. Almost as if it was professionally made- actually no that's an overstatement. Let's not boost their ego any."
Midoriya-fucking-Izuku. The now 28-year-old man who is now grocery shopping.
"Oh, but looky here... this one is on sale..."
'Don't get tricked Izuku; salesmen know how to take advantage of the weak! You shouldn't fall for their foolish tricks!' The logical side of his mind tells him. "But why should I care now? I already picked it up and spent precious seconds examining it... I don't want to just put it back, it's rude." He retaliates.
'Stop being cheap! You do this every time!'
"You say that every time."
The voice sighs, this is getting nowhere. "Anything more to say, eh brain?"
Silence...
"Ok good. Since we agreed on 'Sloppy Tom's Yogurt Variety Pack' we saved 14 cents if I don't eat this all-in-one day and have to come again tomorrow due to my lack of resistance to cravings. We can finally check-out." He says this all to himself. It's the same conversation with his mind every weekend. No one even questions the 28-year-old anymore in fact, many of the workers and/or weekly customers like Izuku can recite the whole conversation with ease.
Finally, after a long hour of debating and getting lost in thought, he walks out of the store.
---
Izuku is invisible to some and visible to others.
Invisible, walking down the street, eating in a restaurant (which he rarely does), going to the laundry-mat and/0r, going through crowds. He's visible when he trips over his feet, drops things, and yawn for an unusual amount of time in public.
Other than that, not many know of Midoriya Izuku. And that's how he would like it to continue. Keyword on 'Would' because shit never goes his way.
---
Twas a bright and shiny day and Izuku found himself wanting to stay in bed. It's the usual really. Sleep, eat and repeat. A simple process the man wishes for. But oh no no, it's like his name is Murphy and he is bounded by Murphy's Law. (Just like that kid from that old Disney Cartoon when he was younger... Poor Milo, he needs a break)
Truly, it's as if the universe is out to get him; it puts him in these situations.
He had forced himself out of bed to go get more toilet paper because asking his neighbor for some every day wasn't cutting it. He uses the cheaper brand called 'Fluffy Times' which is so contradicting. The toiletry is the complete opposite of fluffy! It's so thin! So thin to where he could practically feel that stinky poop on his fingers!
It's so so so so so so gross it sends chills down his spine just thinking about it. (He started walking faster after this feeling)
So now, he's walking back to his humble and cozy apartment but stops after he sees fire and a small crowd watching it spread. The air smells like smoke and (weirdly) distress.
Now Izuku was planning on just walking away, with the thought, 'the heroes got this' but that all stops when a Notebook out of all things appears in his hands.
'This CURSED quirk! I haven't had to deal with you in YEARS and this is what I get?!?!'
What'll happen? Some might wonder... well you'll see in a few minutes.
'Ok ok ok... so with this current situation, what and the hell would I need a notebook for?! To take notes? No, I finished school years ago... To donate it? No, there's no hospital or church around for me to be giving it to anyone! They always take school supplies in for the ones who needs it. So, fucking where?!'
He squints his eyes, trying to view the situation a bit better when he hears, "My quirk isn't useful here!"
"Neither is mine! Fire and wood don't mix!"
"Oh no! A one-way street! My weakness!"
He sighs and begins to walk forward to assess the situation. He sees a slimly, nasty, grimy thing with one eyeball and its yelling goes incoherent after he sees a spikey blonde clawing at its slimy, nasty, grimy body.
A woman who looks somewhat similar to that person flashes in his head, 'Yeah! The brat wants to go U.A for to be a hero! I'm so proud of 'em!'
He remembers the kid he used to babysit on occasion when his mother and her friend, Bakugou Mitsuki, would hang out when he was younger. He looks at the notebook in his hand, the monster, back to the notebook, the monster then to the blonde.
They make eye contact as a spark of recognition is shown in those crimson red eyes but they soon show him internally screaming 'Help me!'.
Izuku sighs, 'Being a hero is the one thing I never wish to be, ever again.'
He deadpans as he examines this weird creature, 'Maybe I should stop calling it weird... wouldn't that be like Quirk Discrimination?' He sighs again, 'Ok I get what I need to do now but why did I get a notebook? Out of all the things on this earth you gave me a notebook.'
Izuku drops his bag of the best brand of toilet paper called 'Fun for ya Bum!' (with a little hesitancy, {those four rolls were 50 cents more than 'Fluffy Times'... let's hope no one steals it.})
And runs forward.
"Kid what are you doing?!"
'Kid? How rude.'
"Just wait until All Might gets here! He's can handle this!"
'Wait until that hunk of meat gets here?! How stupid!'
"Get back here it's not safe!"
He shakes his head, 'Although if I stop now, I won't have to visit the police station later and give my statement on this event... No, I can't do that. It'd be weird if I stopped running now... plus Mitsuki would probably kill me... Not if she doesn't know of course but that's wishful thinking... They are probably putting this on the news... Damnit! Why did I have to go out today?! Out of all days it had to be when I just needed to buy that damned toilet paper!'
At this point, Izuku is at closer to the slimy, grim- uh the Villain and throws the notebook, getting a direct shot to its eye.
"AHHHHHH!!" it yells, 'Perfect, you're distracted.' Izuku thinks as he yanks the blonde forward, yanking him out of the villain's hold. He gasps as he receives that needed fresh breath of air.
Another Item appears; a wind turbine.
'What and the actual fuc-'
He doesn't even have time to process what his body is doing as he quickly sets up the item and presses the black button as its blades spin rapidly. He closes his eyes as the winds become strong with his hair blowing in his face.
He opens his eyes a few seconds later and the slime is gone.
'Oh... I guess this makes sense.'
---
A few minutes later Izuku finds himself sitting in an ambulance with a shock blanket on.
'Does it seriously look like I'm shaking in my boots? Pissing myself? Dissociating? No? Then why am I wrapped around in this thing?!' Izuku thinks.
Seriously though, he's wearing the same bored expression as always. He's a bit pissed at his damn quirk (not really) but other than that he's fine. He's not traumatized and plus he's an adult! Why and the everlasting fuck is he here right no-
"That was stupid for you to do! You put yourself at risk which was unnecessary!"
'How many s's are in that word again?'
"Plus, All Might was just arriving! You didn't need to engage! It was stupid of you to-"
"Gentlemen, please settle... I'm quite familiar with this person. I'll do the scolding if you all are fine with it?"
'Oh, a familiar voice' Izuku thinks, 'Now just who are you again... I know I've seen you somewhere...' Izuku must've put on a thoughtful expression because the man chuckled and said, "You must not remember me." Izuku nods, "Well then, let's go back to the station and refresh your memory."
---
"Oh." 'Oh, the chances of this happening are just almost impossible.'
Currently, events from Izuku's past are resurfacing his mind. With that, he knows that seeing this guy, Tsukauchi Naomasa always brings trouble.
He wants to run
"Midoriya, it's been a while correct? 7 years since I last saw you." The detective says as he sits across from Izuku. He's wearing handcuffs at the moment but Izuku honestly doesn't mind. Tsukauchi wanted to do otherwise but he claimed that he couldn't do that but he offered privacy in the interrogation room.
Which is a stupid claim because there is a one-way mirror behind him.
Izuku just nods lazily, a bit tired because in the back of that cop car he still had that shock blanket on and surprisingly, it was comfortable enough to almost put him to sleep. "What have you been doing?"
Izuku gets to thinking, 'What have I've been doing...?'
"Working, I presume?"
'Lol, he thinks I'm productive... I said this aloud, didn't I?
He laughs, "Still mumbling huh? A habit you couldn't break." Izuku suddenly has the urge to roll his eyes. "You know, I'm surprised." He speaks. Izuku raises an eyebrow, "You still have your Heroes License."
'Huh?'
"That's not possible. I quit being a hero 7 years ago and you know that." Tsukauchi nods as his lips press into a straight line, "It didn't say that when I background checked you. Yes, I know who you are but-"
"But it's mandatory. Ok yeah, I get it. But how am I still...?"
'Oh, that sleazy rat bastard.'
"I'm not sure, Midoriya. Anyways enough reminiscing. Let's get that statement of yours and get you ho-" He stops talking after the door opens, revealing the one person Izuku just didn't need to see right now.
"Eraserhead. I'm busy is there something you need?" The detective asks. He's not even sure if he registered his question as his eyes bore into Izuku's. 'Of course. Of course. Of course.'
"If things can go wrong, they will go wrong, a wise man once said. Honestly, I must be cursed." Izuku mumbles as he just wants to get home and rewatch the Sherlock series for the 10th time. Of course, he knows how each murder case ends but it's nice to play dumb every now and then.
They don't know how happy he is when a key appears in his hand.
"Midoriya...Izuku."
"Caterpillar. How's it been?"