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Toya watches in shock as Rei walks out of the house, looking at his siblings. They also seemed to be in various stages of shock, no one being able to say anything. Toya grabs his coat and follows Rei, pulling it on and slams the backyard door shut.
“What the fuck was that?” Toya asks and looks at his mother, “You fucking forgave him?”
“He wanted to leave you kids something!” Rei argues and looks at Toya, gripping her arms, “He wanted to leave something.”
“More trauma?” Toya asks, hearing his siblings walk out, “Is that it?”
“You don’t know your father,” Rei says in a quiet tone, “You don’t know him, Toya!”
“He was never here!” Toya raises his voice, clenching his hand into a fist.
“He’s a loving, beautiful, crazy man! But he loves you!”
“He deserted us.”
“He loved us! He still does!”
“That was love?” Toya looks at her with wide eyes, “The beatings? The shouting? The burns? That was his version of showing love?”
“I-maybe! No! Yes! I don’t know!”
“Okay, then why did he leave?” Toya asks and walks closer to her, anger and frustration lacing his voice, “Why did he abandon us for another family?!”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Rei waves him off and steps away from him, back turned to him.
Toya looks at his three siblings, seeing them huddled close. He shakes his head and looks at Rei, grabbing her shoulder and turns her around. She was going to listen to everything he had to say.
“If he loved us so much, then why did he leave?” Toya raises an eyebrow and shrugs, “Why?!”
“He always tried! He always did!”
“He was never here!”
“He tried his hardest!”
“He was never here! He was never fucking here!” Toya screams at her, his scream making her shut up, “He left! He left us!”
Toya pants and takes a step back, biting down on his thumb to ground himself. He scoffs and shakes his head, ignoring the tears from his own mother. She was truly oblivious and wondered why her kids didn’t want her in their life. Toya looks down at the ground and inhales and exhales deep breaths.
“I was ten,” Toya says as calmly as possible, “Ten, and taking care of your ass. I was ten when I became the responsible one. I was in fifth grade, Rei,” He says her name as if it burned his tongue, “I was dragging your ass to eat, shower, do basic shit so you wouldn’t die. I stayed up all night when Natsuo got a cold. I washed Shoto’s shitty diapers. I was there for Fuyumi’s first period! I took them to doctors, school events, shopping, to everything! I did! Me! Not you! Or Enji!”
Toya wipes away the painful tears sliding down his cheeks. It hurt to relive those memories and more. He sacrificed his education to care for his siblings and mother. He can’t remember how many meals he skipped, how many sleepless nights he had, how many people he pickpocketed from because Rei wouldn’t give him the combination to a safe for food money. He picked lice from Natsuo, helped Fuyumi with her homework, held Shoto when he couldn’t sleep. He did everything for this family, only for Rei to forgive her ex-husband and bring him back into their lives.
“He’s an abuser,” Toya speaks up, his voice cracking, “A drunk. A good for nothing,” His tone slowly shifting into a monotone one.
“Enough,” Rei whimpers and sits down on the bench, head in her hands.
“He didn’t and doesn’t love me,” Toya shrugs and takes a step closer, “Any of us really. We’re all a disappointment after all. Good for nothing in his success,” Toya kneels down to eye level with Rei, a tear slowly sliding his cheek, “He doesn’t love you. He doesn’t give a shit about you. He only cares about himself,” Toya spits out harshly, gritting his teeth.
Rei whimpers and looks at Toya, her own tears falling down rapidly. “Please,” Was all she could whimper out.
Toya stands up slowly and starts to walk away but stops. He slowly turns so his side faces her, “I’m taking the kids with me. I don’t know where, but I’ve got enough money,” He soon fully faces her, hands in his pockets, “At least he won’t be able to fuck us over anymore. Goodbye, Rei.”
Toya walks away and steps inside the home, walking to the room he shared with with his two brothers. He sees them packing their emergency backpack and sees Fuyumi walk in and start helping. Toya grabs his luggage from the closet, having it ready since weeks ago in case. He had everything he needed so they could start a new life. He has Shoto stay with Natsuo, Fuyumi by his side as they leave.
He’s been through hell, actual fire walking hell, and he would not let the same happen again. Not to him or his siblings. They walk past the smashed in safe box, walking down the quiet streets to a hotel that he knew about. He’s not sure what life he’ll give them, but anything would be better than the one they would have had.