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Another slap. Your cheek was livid, it burned. Your skin was purple and swollen. One more, and for now you knew they had been kind: as a drop of blood fell from your nose and rained on your shirt, you knew they would soon be much nastier than that. Soon they would have grabbed you by the hair as they drowned you in a bucket of water, with the vain hope of getting any kind of information. The man in front of you kept screaming.
"Fucking mothefucker! Do ya wanna tell us where he is? Look, I'll be happy to know just where my money is, and then I'll let you go."
Someone else, equally disgusting, laughed. "Yes, leave that one to my cock and let's see how I get that bitch to sing!"
Everyone laughed along with that pig. Another slap. Another drop of blood. You started laughing too. The damn bastard in front of you didn't take your laugh well: he grabbed your hair and lifted your face again. "Why the fuck are you laughing now, you fucking psycho?!"
You licked the blood on your lip, you showed him all your teeth, like a dog ready to bite. "He will find you, he will cut you into tiny little pieces and then we'll feed you to the lions at the zoo."
The man, pissed off and exasperated, let you go. Your coarse laughter echoed throughout the small, filthy room where they had locked you up; another one of them came up, raised the handle of his gun over your face, then hit you and everything went dark.
When you woke up right there the previous day, on that uncomfortable chair, bound and gagged, you already knew why they had got you. You were his gem, his favorite, and the only one who came out alive from every single interaction with him. The only one who had a relationship with him. The only one who had been there for him until the very end: it was you who made him escape when Batman believed he had finally captured him, no one had yet understood that nothing definitive could ever concern the Joker.
You and J had staged a big theft at Gotham's ACE Chemical Industry - he had the brilliant idea of synthesizing a powerful new nerve-gas for his next attack on the city. Chemical weapons would have been easier to use, faster and more immediate to overthrow the army and bring Batman to his knees, in the face of his depressing defeat, the real problem was that this was roughly the sixth robbery, in just one month.
"J, fuck, you want to get me caught, right? You're trying to frame me..." you complained, laughing, but you didn't give up on that job.
He had lent you a gun, put it in your hands and patted you on the cheek. "And if something happens" he had added, "I'll come back for you, I promise you. I'm a man of my word, you know. Besides... I haven't met dear, old Gordon in a while. He's missing me!" You both laughed, you both expected that if they caught you they would lock you in the police station before moving you to a federal prison that you would never reach. You couldn't imagine it would end like this... The chemical industry magnates didn't appreciate the thefts, they thought the only good solution was to get straight to the source of their problems. They weren't expecting to find you, but they had decided to make the most of the situation, trying to squeeze any information out of your filthy mouth, as if you were ever willing to speak. So they had begun to use the hard way. And it had started to hurt.
Where are you J?
You didn't fully realize what was happening. A great noise, dust and gunshots. A cloud of light that dazzled your eyes, now accustomed to the dark and faint white light of the depressing, wavy bulb above your head. Your mind was confused, the blow they had given you on the forehead had been violent. J often said it, never start with the head. The victim gets all fuzzy and can't notice the next...
"J?! Is that you?" you weren't sure: someone had entered the room with a large tracked vehicle, but was it really possible? Were you dreaming? Those men around you had completely stopped moving and screaming. That Glasgow smile came up to you and it looked just like Joker's blood-red one. You didn't have the energy to stay awake any longer.
"Don't worry, bunny. Your knight has arrived." When he lifted you in his arms as if you were light as air, you fainted.
- * - * - * -
You had slept so well, for so long, when you opened your eyes again Joker was sitting on the bed next to you and looking at you. He looked like he hadn't taken his eyes off you for a whole night. You smiled.
"I had the strangest dream of all. Last night they kidnapped me at ACE Industry and you came to save me. You had destroyed a wall with a bulldozer to get me out of that room and you shot everyone you didn't run over, and then..." - and then he had saved you, as he had promised. But now J was looking at you with a deadly seriousness. Reading him was difficult, his emotions were always deep and far away from reality, but if you had to bet you would have said that there was a primal anger in him and a fear he hadn't felt in a long time.
J grabbed the sheet that covered you and slowly slipped it from your body. Then you became aware of the reality: your body was bruised, your ankles were deeply scratched, as were your wrists. Suddenly your face too began to remember the pain, your still-purple cheek was a clear sign of what they had done to you.
You looked up at him again. Those dark eyes of him seemed to want to say all the words he would never be able to say: I'm sorry, it's my fault, I did everything I could to make up for it. And you knew that was the truth.
"Don't worry, bunny" he said and his grave, gloomy voice was a sign of how seriously he meant those words "I took care of them. You should have seen it... They blew up like balloons, they burst one by one, by one."
The tears that ran down your cheeks almost seemed like you didn't perceive them, but they were tears of joy and relief: he had really come back for you, at the end of it all. You two against the world and that was the promise he had kept. J wasn't the kind of man who casually held you in his arms or who let himself be carried away by sudden displays of affection, but that evening, at that precise moment, he let you have the freedom to take what you want: you turned on your side and let your arms slide around him, resting your face on his thigh as he ran a hand through your hair. He was delicate, delicate as he had never been. That would have been your secret.
"I want you, J" you whispered, before the words could escape you. His hands stopped on you and you knew he was using all of his self-control to not rip the clothes off your body. You could hear his feverish breath on you. Oh you wanted him, you wanted him and you didn't understand why he was hesitating.
"Do you" he said and it didn't sound like a question; his voice was frustrated, as if it took all the effort in the world to be able to answer you without sinking his mouth on your naked body, between your legs, without asking permission.
"I promise you J, I really want you. You can have me."
And then he slipped his hands over you: his fingertips permeated your sensitive skin and when they stopped on a bruise still invisible you hissed in pain. He knew it. His hand continued to move on you, showing you every mark: the cuts on your wrists still burned, the marks of the ropes they had used to tie you up crossed your skin like brushstrokes of dark paint on an untouched canvas. Only at the end his hand reached your face and barely caressed your cheek. There, where they beat you. If he had pressed a little harder you would have felt pain.
"Naughty bunny. I want you too and I'll have lots of fun on you, but tonight... tonight..." he never finished the sentence, he lay down on the mattress next to you and let you close your eyes on his warm chest. The shadow of his lips brushed your forehead. You knew he wouldn't talk, but you understood what he meant. I'm not going to hurt you tonight. You're safe with me tonight. And with this last, sweet thought your eyes closed again.
A moment before falling asleep a funny thought flashed in your head. "J... but, where the heck did you find a bulldozer?"