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You weren’t suppose to be here. You were supposed to be back on The Chimaera where you belonged, the only place you belonged if you were honest. Instead you were here, on Coruscant, dressed in fine silks that felt foreign on your skin. Why couldn’t you have at least had your dress uniform?
Alright, you knew why. This wasn’t a military affair. Ascension week had began, and even a man like Thrawn couldn’t avoid the political spot light forever. He was expected to make an appearance. How could you refuse when he asked you to accompany him?
You tugged at the sleeve. The clothes themselves were of fine quality, but a part of you felt like they fit more like a costume than anything else.
“You look perfect,” Thrawn said, answering your thoughts.
You turned, surprised you hadn’t noticed him in the mirror. Clearly you were further in your own mind than you thought.
“I’ll have to take your word for it,” you said, smoothing down the fabric just to give your hands something to do.
“You should.”
You had to smile. The words were spoken with the clear confidence only he could muster. Still, you couldn’t shake the awkwardness you felt.
He watched your carefully, his eyes narrowing slightly with the effort.
“You do not have to join me, if you do not wish to.”
You shook your head. “I can hardly refuse an order.”
“It was never an order,” he said, sounding oddly…worried, for lack of a better word.
“I know it wasn’t,” you assured, not bothering to hide your smile. “If I could rephrase; I can hardly refuse you.”
His lip quirked upward in a small smile as some of the tension left his shoulders. However, a question remained.
“Then why do you hesitate?”
For a moment, you couldn’t say anything. Your hands fiddled with the fabric as you tried to find the right words. You had done your best to overcome most of your insecurities. On ship they were essentially non-existent. Under Thrawn’s leadership, all one was was their rank and their abilities. Coruscant was another matter.
“I know your position as Grand Admiral is secure, politicians be damned,” you started, slowly. “However, they also have a tendency to talk. And talk can effect how other Commanders view you. I am…unsure about what exactly they will say, if they see you with me in an…unofficial capacity.”
“You worry you might cause me embarrassment,” Thrawn said, bluntly.
You held back a wince. Count on Thrawn to distill a delicately constructed paragraph to its sharp points. “Yes.”
His brow furrowed, as if the idea had never occurred to him. “That would be impossible.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I know you,” he said, firmly. “You are incapable bringing humiliation to anyone, least of all me.”
There it was again, that unwavering confidence you found so captivating. It was hard not to believe him. Still, you managed.
Thrawn didn’t say a word. Slowly, he crossed the room, closing the gap between you until there was only a hair left.
Carefully, he placed his finger under your chin, turning it up until your gaze had to meet his own.
“Do you trust me?” he asked, softly.
You let out a sigh, accepting you had already lost. “You know I do.”
“Then there is nothing more to discuss.”
And with that, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours, sealing his trust in a kiss. How could you not believe him, when he kissed you like this?