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Aether didn’t remember much of what happened after he and Paimon left the ruins, since his senses seemed to be messy and his brain a bit muddled with what happened. He only remembered saying to Paimon that they’d be careful when going to Inazuma, then being back at Liyue Harbor and seeing Paimon reporting to Lan and Ganyu about the mission.
He felt like he was an outsider of his own self, watching everything and everyone else without acknowledging much of what was being said and done.
The only things he was able to feel at the moment were a throbbing headache and pain on his arms and legs from fighting with the Abyss Herald. Maybe he should take care of it when he gets a chance...
“...er! Aether!” A voice exclaimed near him and it made Aether turn around, a bit surprised.
“Paimon…?” Aether looked at his companion, seeing that she had a frown on her face.
“Are you okay? I had been calling your name for a while, but you weren’t listening to me…” Paimon explained in a soft voice.
Aether then noticed that they were already near the bridge closest to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, having already walked away from the Guild. Had they really walked this far without him paying attention to it?
“I’m fine,” he tried to let out a small smile to his friend. “I think I want to go ho—” he stopped talking suddenly.
Home is wherever we are together.
He discovered that he couldn’t bring himself to call the place he stayed in Liyue home, and that he also couldn’t utter this word again, not so soon after everything that happened today.
“I want to go to the inn we’re staying in... I don’t feel like going back to the house in Mondstadt right now… I feel tired.”
Paimon nodded at him, with an understanding expression.
“Paimon agrees with your idea! You should totally take a rest after everything to get strong for tomorrow’s commissions! We should also eat something before going home, since we’ve spent the whole day walking around Liyue and Mondstadt…” She suggested after a while.
Truth be told, Aether didn’t feel like eating anything at that moment, and he told Paimon as much.
“I think I’ll go back first to get cleaned up and everything. You can have dinner at the Wanmin Restaurant if you want… I’m sure Xiangling would prepare something for you and put it on my tab, if you ask her,” he said.
“Oh, okay…” Paimon replied, her tone of voice one of worry still. “You should definitely eat something, though… Are you sure you’re feeling well? We can find a doctor or go to Bubu Pharmacy if you’re feeling some kind of pain.”
“I’m good,” Aether reassured her. “I just want to take a bath and lay down a bit, so this is why I won’t have dinner today. We can eat together again tomorrow, don’t worry...”
“All right! Then Paimon will have dinner at Wanmin and will be back before you know it!” She let out a laugh. “Have a nice rest, Aether!” Paimon smiled happily and waved at him.
Alone again, Aether walked around mindlessly, still feeling a bit out of it while he watched the people in the streets of the Harbor. Luckily, the inn he stayed with Paimon was very close to the Feiyun Slope, so it didn’t take him too long to get there.
Taking care to not worsen his injuries, he took a somewhat relaxing bath in his room, trying to breathe deeply and camly for what seemed the first time that day. It worked, if only for the duration of his bath, since he felt a bit more peaceful while soaked in the water and after it.
However, after putting some clothes back on and even laying down on his bed, the restlessness made itself present again. He couldn’t shake off the feeling that he should be doing something instead of trying to sleep, so he decided to take another walk to clear his mind again. At least, he could tire himself out before coming back and maybe he would be able to close his eyes for a bit and take a rest.
Aether left after writing a note for Paimon and leaving it in their room, the note saying that he’d be walking in Liyue for some time and that she should not worry about him.
He walked and walked through the streets of Liyue, until his feet brought him to the small area of grass and rocks near Bubu Pharmacy, in the Yujing Terrace. The place brought back some memories of the Lantern Rite, of an easier time (although very busy) and of having Xiao with him when seeing the Mingxiao Lantern go up.
Xiao… It had been some days since Aether had seen him and, he could confess, it would be nice to see him again soon. Maybe he could… He could go to the Wangshu Inn just to see Xiao, right? He wasn’t an expert in romantic relationships, but he knew that it was good to see your significant other whenever you had an opportunity and wanted to see them.
Without waiting for his brain to offer him excuses as to why he shouldn’t go after the yaksha, Aether simply went to the nearest waypoint and activated it.
Getting to the top floor of the inn wasn’t difficult, especially because the waypoint was already located on one of the highest floors, so he only waved a greeting for Verr Goldet from the stairs before reaching his destination.
Now that he was there, he felt like maybe he shouldn’t have gone after Xiao on a whim, especially because he didn’t know if Xiao would even be there that night. He also was wearing very simple clothes that were mostly used to sleep. It was not a good sight for an adventurer, probably. The moon was already very high in the sky, it was probably very late, and he didn’t know why he was outside at such an hour when not on a mission, but well, what’s done is done.
“Aether.” A familiar voice called from behind him, and, not to be dramatic or anything but Aether felt like maybe being outside that time of the night would be worth it, after all.
Because Xiao was here.
Aether turned around to see the other man, letting out a small smile again when he saw him dressed in his usual set of clothes.
“Xiao! Hi!” He greeted as soon as he could. His voice lacked the usual enthusiasm, he was sure, but it still held the affection he felt for the other whenever he said his name.
“Are you well? Do you need anything? I did not expect you to be here this time of the night…” Xiao said, approaching Aether in careful steps.
“I’m fine,” Aether replied, using the same words he kept repeating to himself and to Paimon during the whole day. “I just wanted to see you, and this is why I’m here.”
If Xiao’s furrowed brows were anything to go by, he didn’t seem to believe his words that much.
“Come with me,” he held Aether’s hand, taking him towards one of the rooms of the inn, and Aether followed him silently. “I am glad to see you, as well.” Xiao ended up confessing, and Aether could see the redness of his ears.
Honestly, it was cute that an Adeptus could blush and it was all because of something Aether did.
Said Adeptus didn’t need to sleep as much as a human being, but he still had a room reserved to him by Verr Goldet and Huai’an. It was a simple room, with a bed and a few pieces of furniture, but Xiao mostly occupied it when he wanted to have some privacy when talking to Aether, Zhongli or even Venti when he visited Liyue.
After they got into the room and closed the door, Xiao directed Aether to sit on the bed, while he got him a cup of water from the jar on the bedside table.
Aether thanked Xiao but didn’t say much more as he took the cup of water to drink.
“You are injured,” Xiao commented some time later, watching Aether from where he was standing up in front of him.
“I had to investigate some ruins today,” Aether explained, still holding the object, “there was… a difficult enemy to deal with. I didn’t know their attack patterns so they caught me by surprise.”
“I see,” Xiao nodded at him. “I have some bandages here that the inn boss brought to me last time. Would you… let me treat your wounds?"
Aether felt a bit surprised by the offer, but accepted it soon after.
“Of course… And thank you.”
It wasn’t always that Xiao felt comfortable with touching him a lot when it came to healing – he confessed to being still afraid of his Adepti powers and his karma sometimes – so Aether always appreciated it when Xiao took the initiative anyway.
They were both silent during the process, but it wasn’t a bad thing, since the two enjoyed the moments of silence in their relationship too.
“Something happened…” Xiao said it like a statement, not asking Aether if it was true. He probably concluded that from the way Aether was acting ever since he got there, and well, it was the truth. “And you don’t need to tell me what it was, especially if you are having problems with expressing it, but just know that I am here for you, regardless of what it is.”
“Thank you,” Aether replied in a heartfelt tone, feeling thankful for Xiao’s company and his care.
After dressing Aether’s wounds, Xiao put away the medicine box, went to wash his hands, and sat down on the bed beside Aether. Xiao wasn’t wearing his gloves when he applied the salve on his injuries, and he also didn’t wear them again.
He put his hands over Aether’s cheeks, and all he could feel was the not so warm touch of the palms of his calloused hands.
“You look different, today,” Xiao observed, caressing one side of his face with his thumb. “There is something in your eyes that I have not seen before… Not to this extent, at least.”
Aether stared at him wide-eyed, not expecting the other to be able to read him that way so soon. He knew he was acting differently from usual, but he didn’t think it was so obvious to the man in front of him. He couldn’t even explain to himself whatever he had been feeling ever since he came back to Liyue in the afternoon.
“What do you mean?” He asked, already afraid of the answer the other would offer him.
“Aether, you look sad," Xiao said with a frown.
“I’m… I’m not—” sad, he thought of answering the same way he did with Paimon. But somehow the last word didn’t want to leave his mouth, and he just kept staring at Xiao while thinking about what to say instead.
Was he sad? What was he feeling at that moment, other than the pain of his injuries and the headache that seemed to make his brain hurt? Now that he thought about it, the pain on his chest seemed to have worsened too, like he felt it from inside out, as if something was squeezing his heart.
Paimon had asked if he had been saying the truth, but maybe in that moment he hadn’t known what the truth of his feelings were.
He… he was sad. He saw Lumine… She… She…
“I’m…” Aether started talking, but he couldn’t finish his sentence. He looked helplessly at Xiao, really looked at him and his worried face, and felt something snap within him, tears falling freely from his eyes in front of the other. “I am sad, Xiao,” he finally cried out, holding his hands out to reach for Xiao’s shirt, “it hurts so much…”
Xiao seemed surprised by his emotional outburst for only a few instants, before he brought Aether closer to his body in a hug. Aether choked on a sob when he felt Xiao’s arms wrap around him, and he heard the other’s comforting sounds.
Lumine was alive. He saw his sister and she was well. She survived all the years they spent away from each other and he finally met her again.
But she didn’t want to stay with him… She didn’t want to go home again.
Why did she simply leave after they saw each other again? And why was she siding with the Abyss?
How could he not be sad? How could he understand what she meant by saying they would meet when it was the right time?
Who could he trust now after everything his sister and Dainsleif said? What would he do in Inazuma, if searching for his sister was not his main worry anymore? Who was telling the truth?
“Aether, please breathe,” Xiao said very close to his ear.
Aether didn’t know if this was the first time the other had spoken, but since he heard it, he tried to focus on what was happening right here and right now instead of the many conflicting questions on his head.
Xiao held Aether away from the hug for a while so that he could get more air than when he was stuck to Xiao’s neck when trying to recover. Aether tried to follow Xiao’s voice and breathe in and out in a slow rhythm to calm himself again. Xiao kept watching him, wiping away his tears.
“Do you feel better now?” Xiao asked some minutes later, when Aether’s breathing seemed to be almost back to normal.
Aether nodded, feeling like the pain was still there but it didn’t press too much heavily into his lungs now. He leaned forward tiredly against Xiao’s body, and hugged him tight. His tears kept falling down, but this time he also tried to focus on his breathing to not feel that desperate lack of air from before again.
They separated for a bit so that Xiao could get rid of his clothes’ accessories and wear something more comfortable for lying down in the bed. Whenever Aether spent the night here, Xiao always had a set of clothes for sleeping, and it always made him curious to know where Xiao got them from.
Moreover, Aether would confess that of all things he didn’t expect when dating an Adeptus, none of them was that said being would enjoy cuddling so much. Especially considering the way their first meeting went, with Xiao telling him that he shouldn’t be so close to an Adeptus, or how they didn’t touch a lot at the beginning of their friendship. Not that Aether didn’t like this development, since he enjoyed hugging Xiao whenever he could get away with the skinship, but it was a surprising discovery nonetheless.
The two then laid down on the bed, Aether on top of Xiao, and hugged each other once more. Aether put his head on Xiao’s chest, listening to the other’s heartbeat and thinking to himself how human he seemed whenever they were just like this.
Aether’s heart was still hurting, his thoughts were confused and the tears wouldn’t stop trying to fill his eyes, but the feeling of being in Xiao’s embrace warmed him for the first time that day.
“Do you want to talk about the events from today?” Xiao asked when the silence prevailed between them again, with his fingers running through Aether’s hair and a gentleness to his voice that made Aether feel comforted.
“No.” Aether mumbled, “not yet… I don’t think I can even put it into words right now…”
“It is okay, then, I understand…” Xiao agreed, and Aether felt a small touch of something on his forehead. He smiled thinking that it was probably a kiss, and had the feeling of being safe right here in Xiao’s arms. At least, his safety was granted during this night here at the Wangshu Inn.
Aether really didn’t want to talk about his day, as he still didn’t even know exactly what it was that he was feeling. There was so much to reflect on: everything that Lumine and Dainsleif said about Khaenri’ah, his own memories of arriving in Teyvat in the past, the things Dainsleif said about the Archons, Lumine being the Princess of the Abyss…
He was sad, and hurt, but most of all he was lost, for everything he believed until now about his sister missing was simply her not wanting to be found...
Aether shook his head against the cloth on Xiao’s chest and tried to stop thinking, at least for a few moments. He couldn’t do anything right now, and his head was already hurting enough. Maybe… Maybe tomorrow he would be able to think straight about his priorities from now on, and maybe… he could also go to the Bubu Pharmacy to get some medicine for his head, too.
Perhaps, he could even tell Xiao something about it, about Lumine, before he thought about his next steps of his journey across Teyvat.
(How could he even begin to tell Xiao about Khaenri’ah, though, asking him about Venti and Zhongli’s roles in its destruction, since the two were really important to Xiao? Had Xiao been there too? What does he know about the war from five hundred years ago?)
Aether grunted. So much for not thinking about it right now… He wanted to close his eyes and rest, if not his mind at least his body should get the recovery it deserved.
“Close your eyes,” Xiao chided jokingly, proceeding to close Aether’s eyes with his fingers. “You need to rest.”
“Okay, okay,” Aether chuckled a bit, closing his eyes once again. He indeed wanted to take a rest before the tomorrow of his plans would arrive (and when his choices about the decisions of the future start).
“You can sleep now. I will still be here when you wake up.” Xiao promised, touching Aether’s arm reassuringly, before cuddling up to him again.
“I know,” Aether murmured against Xiao’s chest, knowing that he would hear the answer anyway, since they were close to each other.
Before the unconsciousness pulled him under, Aether remembered hearing Xiao’s humming, like a lullaby filled with affection and protection, and thinking to himself that tomorrow didn’t seem that scary anymore while he was in Xiao’s care.