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Somehow, they did it.
They found the answers they needed, saved the people that needed saving, and left their world in safe hands. The fighting, the running, the killing; it was all over now. Now all Erwin had to worry about was bringing home enough ingredients for dinner. And all Levi had to worry about was not burning said ingredients beyond recognition. It was a quiet life, one that both men had dreamed of for years, but never quite expected to see it with their own eyes.
Money was no longer an issue either. Levi could afford to buy his tea, Erwin his old books, and they still had a substantial amount left over at the end of every month. It seemed the military was more than willing to let the two soldiers have a comfortable life at their expense. Their monthly pensions would be able to sufficiently feed, clothe, and entertain them for the rest of their lives.
They chose a small cottage in an even smaller town, known only for its excellent cheese and for the small Survey Corps garrison that it housed. Even though they were officially retired, it was still pleasant to stroll over to the unpretentious row of long, red bricked buildings, and have lunch with the new Commander and her soldiers. But most days, they tended to their small home, (bringing it up to the standards of cleanliness demanded by Levi) and enjoyed the hours where they could just rest.
But it became quickly apparent to Erwin that Levi was growing uncomfortable with the wealth they were accumulating as time went on. Erwin was pleased to have a small nest egg for the future, pleased that whatever life may throw at them at least they would be financially prepared. But Levi’s underground roots were still firmly entrenched into his being, and he could hardly stand the fact that nobody was benefitting from this wealth. Why had he fought so hard for everyone’s freedom when only certain individuals were reaping the profits? His people were most likely still living in squalor, in poverty, and far from any help whatsoever.
Going into town became Levi’s least favorite chore, and Erwin soon picked up on the reason behind his reluctance. It was the eyes of the children that followed them wherever they went that bothered Levi the most. Erwin had first assumed that some nuance of their high military status had trickled its way down to this town, and the children just wanted a glimpse of retired military men. But after seeing the way Levi would stiffen at the stares, and they way he would discreetly hide their purchases under a folded jacket, Erwin gathered a vague idea of what was happening. He promised himself that he would bring it up that very night, to see if there was anything that could be done to ease Levi’s mind.
After a dinner of mildly scorched beef and vegetables, Erwin found himself seated in his armchair with a book in his lap and Levi on the floor leaning up against his legs. Now or never, he supposed.
“Levi, can we talk about something? I think it’s been bothering you and its been on my mind ever since this afternoon when I finally realized what it was.”
Levi turned to look up at him, a small frown furrowing his brow,
“What is it, Erwin?”
“It’s about our situation. More specifically, our money. I feel as though you’re uncomfortable with our accumulation of wealth. Am I being too ostentatious for your taste? Because every time we go into town, you look as though we’re shopping for caskets…” Erwin wanted to go on, but he knew he was treading on very thin ice, so instead he put his book aside and slid onto the floor, legs spreading to encircle the smaller body, while his arms snaked their way around Levi’s shoulders. He could feel Levi relax against his body; his back leaning comfortably against Erwin’s chest, and soon Levi spoke:
“It’s not the money Erwin, it’s what we’re doing with it that bothers me. Rather, it’s what we’re not doing with it. We save and save, month after month, but all it does is gather dust in this cottage. Its not helping anybody, and there’s so many people that we could help.”
“So many people? Or children? I’ve seen the way you look at them. And I’ve seen the way they stare at us. It’s because we’re buying food isn’t it?”
Levi turned in Erwin’s arms, his dark eyes searching for understanding. He knew that Erwin had lived a relatively well off life, so it was surprising that he could easily realize what made Levi so uncomfortable. Then again, he had been promoted to Commander for a reason, and Levi was grateful for his partner’s perceptiveness.
“You’ve never been there Erwin. Not knowing how long it’s going to be between meals. If you can count leftover table scraps, rotten food, and rainwater as a meal. It’s hell seeing other people walking past you with a warm loaf of bread. Your mouth watering as they purchase a ham hock and a round of cheese. It drives you to do crazy things Erwin. You steal, you mug people, all to get a few pennies for something warm to eat. And once you’re branded as a criminal, nobody trusts you, so you have to keep stealing and mugging and some even kill, just to eat something.” Levi stopped himself, letting his head fall back against Erwin’s shoulder, eyes bright with unshed tears. Never had he thought he would have to explain this feeling, this moment of his past, and least of all to Erwin of all people. He closed his eyes, feeling the bitter tears slide down his cheeks, and roughly wiping them away before they could stain his shirt.
Erwin pressed a soft kiss to Levi’s temple, and held him even tighter against his chest, feeling the slow hiccups and labored breathing that Levi was trying so hard to hide. He knew how much it took for Levi to even mention his past, so hearing him speak so openly, Erwin knew it meant this was an important topic to him.
“Levi, do you want to help the children of this town? We can make sure they have enough to eat, maybe even get them clothes and shoes. It won’t be much, but I’m sure we can help them. And perhaps that means they won’t end up as criminals either. Levi, listen to me. You’re absolutely right, we have more than enough money to help them. To help as many of them as we can.” Erwin looked down at the still sniffling bundle in his arms, wondering why he was still crying when Erwin had offered what he thought was a splendid solution.
“Levi, did you hear me? We can help them, I promise.” He carefully turned Levi around, trying to gauge his reaction. When he turned, Erwin would have gladly fed and clothed all the street children of the world if it meant he would see that smile.
Pure, unadulterated joy radiated from Levi’s smile, his red-rimmed eyes and dried tear tracks at odds with the happiness that effused from his body. He mouthed the words, but no sounds escaped,
“We can help them…”
Levi turned and fully faced Erwin and planted a chaste kiss to Erwin’s lips then gently pressed his forehead against the other’s. His whispered words warm against Erwin’s lips,
“We can help them.”