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The love of the lotus. That was what the name Ren meant, but Ryuji would never tell you that he researched it online in an attempt to find a good conversation starter. Ren was a girl in his class, extremely smart, gentle and shy, had long, light brown hair and dark eyes; she really was a tiny lotus flower compared to Ryuji Goda, whose intimidating stature terrified her at the beginning of the year, but Ren was nice enough to greet him every morning by their lockers. Ryuji liked her voice. It sounded sweet, not too imposing, just the slightest bit nervous, still. Of course, all the boys in their sixth grade class were crushing on her, but Ryuji had never been one to back down from a challenge.
Tomorrow was Valentine’s Day, and today their teacher had brought special cupcakes for everyone, which Ren and another girl were handing out. Ryuji stayed still at his desk, content to watch and be silent while everyone else blabbed and talked about how excited they were to receive Valentines.
“I wonder what Lee-kun will give me tomorrow!”
“I hope I get lots of chocolate—last year I didn’t get any.”
“Do you think Yuna will give me something special?”
Ryuji snapped out of his funk when he realized Ren was heading to his desk next, straightening up like a nun as she approached holding a chocolate cupcake with pink frosting and white heart sprinkles on top.
“Here you go, Ryuji-kun,” Ren said softly.
“Thanks…”
Ren turned to the next aisle, but a large hand reached out and touched her arm; looking back, she saw that it was Ryuji’s, though he quickly pulled it away when he had her attention. The boy reached into his pocket and pulled out a small pink note, slyly holding the object in her direction without making direct eye-contact. He didn’t want her to notice how his cheeks had gone slightly pink. Ren seemed confused at first, but eventually reached out and accepted the paper—Ryuji looked back just in time to catch her own cheeks ignite into dark bloom when their fingertips accidentally touched, trying not to be so happy at the sight as he hurriedly turned his attention to the cupcake sitting on his desk.
“E-Enjoy!” Ren added.
Despite feigning ignorance, Ryuji was still watching from the corner of his eyes, even as he devoured the delicious cupcake. Bet she’d look cute in red, the middle-schooler thought innocently, imagining Ren’s school skirt in a different shade. She handed out the last of the cupcakes, smiling when everyone thanked her repeatedly. Maybe she’ll wear a cute bow in her hair tomorrow—I heard the other girls talking about it. Ren would definitely look the cutest…
“Alright everyone, I hope you enjoyed the cupcakes!” Their teacher said just as the bell went off. “Make sure to eat them before your next class, and don’t forget your Valentines tomorrow!”
“Thank you, Mrs. Yamaguchi!”
In no hurry to give an explanation for his secret note, Ryuji grabbed his things quickly, ducking out of the classroom before Ren could read its content. No one got in the tall boy’s way, avoiding him completely as he hurried through the hallway to his next class—normally Ryuji didn’t run away from anything, but this was an entirely different situation he wasn’t used to. This had to do with a girl, a really cute girl Ryuji liked a lot. Girls were much harder to deal with than boys. What would Ren’s reaction be, when she opened the note and read it? Would she think it was a joke? Would she even read it at all?
Do you like me?
YES or NO
-Ryuji
Shit. Maybe I shouldn’t have done that, Ryuji cringed as he remembered what the note said. Stupid! What are we, five-years-old? I should’ve just waited until tomorrow to give her something special! Why did I give her that dumb note?!
The longer the school day went on without Ryuji finding a reply to the note in his locker, the worse his mood became. He couldn’t stop thinking about what Ren’s reaction would be, if he was going to have to spend the rest of the year ignoring her cute cheeks and blocking-out her charming voice. By the time final period arrived, he was ready to skip school tomorrow all together, just to avoid the humiliation of being rejected by the sweetest girl in their class. Men, Ryuji would never run away from—but girls? They were something else. The idea of Ren showing her friends the special note the frightening and cold Ryuji Goda gave to her was too embarrassing to handle.
Don’t be ridiculous, Ryuji, he told himself with a shake of the head, slamming his locker door shut a little too harshly. You can’t run away like some chump! Besides, you can’t skip tomorrow and miss out on all the candy. Man-up and deal with whatever her response is.
Ryuji might have given himself a tough-love pep talk, but his spirit was still dejected as he made his way outside into the fresh spring air, head down, expression sour as can be. He was so inside his head that Ryuji ended-up bumping shoulders with someone else, body jolting in panic when he looked up (or down, rather) and saw none other than Ren Takashima standing there on the sidewalk. She looked as pretty as ever, black jacket buttoned together, blue hairpin holding her bangs back, big brown eyes trying their best to maintain eye contact.
“Oh—sorry, Ren-kun,” Ryuji apologized immediately, bowing his head and nearly smashing into hers in the process. “Didn’t see ya there.”
“It’s okay…I just—I-I wanted to give you this back.”
Ren’s small hands were tightly clutching the pink paper, now folded-up all fancy and girly-like. Ryuji’s brain stalled for a long moment, finally telling him to accept the note, which was exactly when Ren’s social battery wore-out.
“Okay, bye!” She squeaked, jogging in the other direction to catch-up with one of her friends. Ryuji Goda stood on the sidewalk watching her moving figure for a minute, still surprised at what just happened. Half of him wasn’t expecting to ever get an answer, much less, get an answer in person. Shaking off his nerves, Ryuji glanced around the property before slowly unfolding the note from its origami fold—he reread what he had written for the hundredth time, grin breaking-out on his lips when he saw the word YES circled many times in dark blue pen.
***
Ryuji may have spent most of the day in angsty spirits, but he was considerably happy by the time he made it home, steps more energetic as he kicked off his shoes in the entryway. Delicious smells momentarily distracted the boy from his euphoria, leading Ryuji to the dining room, where he was surprised to see his father waiting, table filled with food, plates already set out for them.
“Just in time, Ryuji,” His father said, motioning for him to sit down. “How was school today?”
“It was alright,” He shrugged. “How’re you?”
“Fine, fine…I figured you’d be hungry, so I had the cooks make up your favorites.”
Ryuji wasn’t good at talking with his father, much less, showing his gratitude, giving a simple nod as he sat down at the table. A few things tipped Jin Goda off about his son’s behavior—Ryuji had placed his backpack down instead of throwing it aside, he didn’t immediately dig into his food like a starving middle-schooler, and his expression was strangely content, eyebrows not scrunched or narrowed like usual. For a few minutes, Jin simply observed him as they ate their meal in silence, but after a while his curiosity got the best of him.
“Something on your mind?” Jin asked cautiously.
“Haw?” Ryuji mumbled over his food.
“You seem…different today. Did something happen at school?”
I really hate when he does that, Ryuji frowned, taken aback by this accusation. Stupid old people…why do they always have to be in my business?
“No,” The blonde student lied casually. “Just a regular day.”
“You’re good at lying to others, Ryuji, but not to your father,” Jin almost smiled, grabbing his teacup. “Tell me, what’s got you so distracted?”
Talking girls with his dad—that didn’t sound like fun at all. Ryuji didn’t really have a choice, now, staring at his plate and wondering how he could talk about Ren without giving away too much information. It’s not that he cared if his father teased him; Ryuji just didn’t want a lecture. Most conversations with Jin Goda turned into one, and the middle schooler wasn’t too eager to trigger that reaction.
“…There’s this girl in my class I like,” Ryuji offered lowly. “I’m going to give her a Valentine tomorrow.”
“Ah—I see. What are you going to give her?”
“A flower. And some chocolate, probably. She likes truffles and stuff.”
Jin nodded and returned to his supper, but he had this stupid expression on that Ryuji hated. It was a knowing look, like he wanted a chance at rebuttal. Silence ensued for the next several minutes before Ryuji couldn’t take it anymore.
“What?” His son grumbled.
“Just thinking,” Jin waved-off. “Women are a delicate subject—there are some who will use your status to their advantage as you get older. I just want you to be careful, Ryuji, so your feelings aren’t unnecessarily injured in the process of impressing a young girl. Women can make fools of us all.”
Ryuji knew his father was speaking out of bitterness, most likely having Ryuji’s mother in his thoughts. He knew she left Jin for another man when her son was still young—of course the yakuza boss was still bitter about it. Ryuji wanted to speak-up for Ren, defend her innocent intentions and make it clear to his father that she wasn’t like “women” Jin was involved with, but found himself remaining completely silent for the remainder of their dinner.
***
It was Valentine’s Day, and all the students were cheerfully snacking on goodies they had received and sharing their favorite cards with anyone who wanted to see. While his classmates goofed around, Ryuji was sitting in the corner, being quiet and thoughtful. He too, had a stack of candy on his desk, but there was only one card he read so far, it being from Ren herself; there was a cute puppy chewing on a box of chocolates printed on the front, with the phrase “love at first bite” written above. It was cute. Did Ren know how much he liked dogs? Maybe. Ryuji should have been making himself sick with chocolates by now, but he couldn’t stop thinking about what his father said the night before.
Ren-kun wouldn’t try to make a fool of me, Ryuji tried to convince his doubts, finger running over the card edge repeatedly. She’s too nice. I mean, I guess the other kids could’ve convinced her to trick me…but what could she gain from that? They know I’m not to be made an enemy of, right?
Ren wouldn’t do that. She likes me. That’s why she circled ‘yes’ in the note. Right?
Ryuji’s self-control lasted another ten-minutes before he hesitantly looked across the classroom, where Ren sat by the open windows surrounded by her friends. They were chewing on chocolates and exchanging cards, Ren being her usual quiet self, just observing and smiling along with them—Ryuji noticed the empty wrappers of the truffles he gave her sitting on the desk and silently wondered if she had enjoyed them. His father’s voice echoed in his head as well, forcing Ryuji to ask himself if all Ren wanted from him was some expensive chocolates. He meant to look away after only a few seconds, but Ren’s hold on Ryuji was tighter than he knew.
Her hair did have a red and pink bow in it today, at the end of a beautiful braid swept over her right shoulder; she also had a pair of heart-shaped earrings in, cheap and plastic, but still elegant and fashionable. Ren wasn’t the type to wear a lot of makeup, adding just a thin layer of pink eyeshadow to compliment her deep brown eyes, as well as some light blush brushed over her rounded cheeks. There were no clouds out today, allowing the sun to burst in through the windows at just the right angle, cascading warmly over Ren’s shimmering hair and perfectly ironed uniform. It was at that moment, Ryuji stuck on her angelic image like a devout worshiper that Ren looked in his direction and sent him a smile. It was a timid smile, like she wasn’t sure if Ryuji was focused on her or someone else, but her slightly crooked teeth were exposed, her dimples bright and cheerful.
Ryuji wasn’t sure how long he stared at her, but eventually the final bell interrupted their moment.
“Happy Valentine’s Day!”
“Thanks for the chocolate!”
“Look how many cards I got, Haru!”
“Dude, you’ll never guess who gave me a Valentine.”
Ryuji gathered his things in record time, taking something carefully out of his backpack before shoving the candies and cards inside. He raced out of the room and waited by the school’s front staircase, ignoring the strange looks he got from other students; after some time, Ren finally exited with a few of her friends. Ryuji tried to appear even taller than he already was, staring intently at the girl so she would notice him—he watched Ren say something to her friends before they went on without her, courtyard nearly empty by the time Ren shyly approached the blonde boy.
“H-Hi, Ryuji!” She stammered, fidgeting with her hair, as if it could look anything less than perfect. “Um—did you get many Valentines today?”
“A few,” He coughed, voice switching to a lower octave. “How ‘bout you?”
“I got some chocolates, candies, and Saeko-chan even gave me some perfume.”
“Cool.”
Ren wanted to say something else, maybe thank Ryuji for the truffles he gave her, but couldn’t find the strength to look up at him again. He wasn’t as scary as everyone else thought—Ren just clammed-up whenever they spoke because she thought he was handsome. Her mind was reeling, trying to find anything relevant to comment on when a flower with light pink petals and yellow disk suddenly appeared in her line of vision.
“It’s a lotus flower,” Ryuji explained before Ren could ask, pressing it against her hands. She accepted the gift gently, careful not to drop it. “Just like your name, right?”
“Oh…it’s—it’s beautiful, Ryuji-kun!” Ren said in awe, bringing the flower up to smell the velvety petals. “T-Thank you. And—thank you for the chocolates, too.”
Ryuji was focused entirely on his crush, and despite all this attention, Ren managed to send an embarrassed but ever-so-thankful smile his way. It was just like before, at the window in the classroom, but being this close made her smile even prettier to Ryuji. He didn’t care if she was using him for money or popularity or protection like his father warned—when Ren smiled at him like that, holding the flower he gave her, Ryuji decided women were the only people that were worth being fools for.
“You wanna go get ice cream or something?” He asked, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. All traces of his embarrassment faded when Ren nodded happily, cradling the lotus against her chest as they turned to walk down the staircase together.
“I’d like that, Ryuji-chan.”