Chapter Text
Madara did not consider himself, in any way, a stan of anybody or anything. He had his own handful, or hands-full of fans, and while he appreciated them he could not personally understand the culture. This is what he told himself over and over as he scrolled through the twitter feed on the account none of his fans, stans or friends knew of.
Senjuice. The account that he dedicated to the popular streamer Senju Hashirama. There is no problem with this as a standalone statement, but Madara and Hashirama were co-workers. Acquaintances, friendly acquaintances, and occasional collaborators. Had any word of this gotten out. Madara with absolutely no hesitation would delete his entire online presence, even at the cost of his livelihood and source of income.
He exhaled through his nose, turning over in bed as his cold fingers continued to slide against the screen of his phone, Twitter was truly addicting. It was already 3 in the morning, he was thankful his job was so flexible and allowed him to do something as pointless as this. Managing a fan account was quite hard, he had come to realise.
Madara often got into arguments with fellow fans, not just of Hashirama but of himself as well. It was nice to stay anonymous and still be able to say what you truly mean. This built his fanaccount, Senjuice, quite the reputation among the other fans. He sometimes just wanted to strangle the people he interacted with.
One of said people suddenly appeared in his feed. A good session of telling people how moronic they are always put him in a better mood, and seeing as he was about to sleep he figured it was the best time. (It most certainly was not the contents of this post making him irritated enough to fight with a fan.)
— “Can we collectively agree yet that Madara makes better content than Hashirama?”
Madara stared at this simple post for an abnormal amount of time. He feels as his eyebrows furrow in disagreement, then he directs himself to the comment section to start his usual spat of disapproval. It was not even anything worth arguing over, but he couldn't stop his fingers from writing now.
He thinks for a moment but settles on a simple Are you stupid? sending it without another thought. He taps on the users profile, seeing a screenshot of his face as the icon and sighs. Madara really doesn’t know why people start such tiresome arguments, there was absolutely no point in comparing the two.
( Uchiwhore replied to your comment. )
Even the username was… Certainly a bold choice. He was embarrassed for this person. He cracked his knuckles in preparation for the future trash talking he’s about to partake in, settling further into his blankets as he taps the notification.
— “I am not implying that Hashirama’s content is bad, it is just that Madara’s is better. If this makes me stupid then I suppose I am an idiot.” (+1 photo attached).
Madara was staring at the photo that was sent with his tired eyes, the expression he was making was intense. It was another unsuspecting screenshot of himself playing a game, the stranger talked more properly than the other’s he’s argued with. He suddenly didn’t know how to reply. The Uchiha Madara was almost speechless… Almost.
Your comparison is completely pointless and the two would not be happy that you’re comparing them, they are friends, I would say to keep your thoughts to yourself but im not too sure youre able to think in the first place. Else, you wouldn’t have posted this.
He bit his lip for a moment, deciding to add a Hashirama supremacy at the end. This reply was weak but his eyes were starting to sting, he had to stream tomorrow so he decided to put the spat on hold.
Madara dropped his phone somewhere, he hoped it was the bedside table, and thought again about Hashirama before he closed his eyes and dozed off quickly in the pitch blackness of his room.
Madara clicked on the small Start Stream button, blinking at his webcam as he waited for people to flood into his unscheduled stream. His phone was forgotten in his room, but the post was not. He gnawed on his lip once again, it was a nervous habit, but he knew he should bring up the oddities his fans were spreading sometime soon. This was his crowd to control, after all.
“Hello, hello. What are we doing today?” Madara read from the chat, tired eyes following the endless chatter as best as he can. “I’m in the mood to crush some people today, so that’s what we’re going to do.”
He opened his game client up, drinking from the cup of coffee he had brewed himself after he woke up. It was completely black, the bitterness barely bothered him either way. The game he opened was a first person shooter that he played most often, you get placed in a team of five that are a similar rank to you. You choose between four classes, the goal is to destroy all the resurrection stones on the opposing team's side of the map.
Madara clicked a few times, warming up as he queued for a ranked game. His high level and rank was fun until the queue time was so long. He put his cup down on his desk, looking at his second monitor to check the chat again.
“Play with you guys? So that my rank can drop? No thanks. Maybe later.. Play with a friend? I’m a streamer, I don’t have any of those.”
He glanced again at the timer, he was impatient but the thought of crushing his soon to be opponents was too tempting to exit the game and try another. Now was a good time, he supposed, to tell those certain fans off. He clicked a few more times on nothing, rolling his shoulders twice and looking into the camera again.
“While we’re waiting, I just wanted to-”
( Ping! Game found, loading. . . )
Madara’s posture deflated, of course he would get put into a game so fast the one time he had a topic to discuss. This was ranked so he had to focus, it wasn’t as if he was too talkative during his streams anyhow. He had no idea why people liked to watch him.
He rarely cared about his teammates, playing an offensive class that didn’t necessarily require cooperation, though it was always easier to win when the entire squad was working as one. Madara’s teammates, though high level, were always idiots. He watched his team spawn in, waiting for the count down at the top to reach 0 so they could start moving out and towards the other team.
As he watched his team spawn in, he was sure he felt his expression change, the familiar username Sage. Hashirama’s character was just to the left of his own, it looked a little like Hashirama’s real self. Long straight hair, tan skin, gentle but strong features, only this figure was adorned in armour.
Ghost was his own username, a little edgy but he didn’t care. He designed his character in a similar way, close to himself but of course it’s only pixels. Madara realises he’s a little too quiet for the waiting period, which he usually talks during. His stream’s chat is all pointing out his friend’s appearance.
“Oh, Has- Sage is here? I didn’t notice.” Madara lies to his stream, opening the game chat and wondering if he should greet his friendly acquaintance. The other 3 players appear to be fans of them. He loudly sighed, knowing this game would probably be annoying.
Hashirama was a rare dual class player, he switched between offensive and healer classes a lot. Today he was the second offensive class, the teams are usually composed of one healer, two attackers, one sniper and one tank. Madara himself was almost always an attacker or a sniper. He closed the game chat, deciding against the greeting, and watched the timer hit 0. His fingers pressed into the keyboard in front of him, a clicky noise following right after.
“Okay guys. No more fanboy, girl or.. whatever else, ing. He’s probably grinding, it’s a shame we’re paired up with three idiots. No, no I’m not entering team voice chat. Good try,” he still talked with his chat as he left the team to start his usual routine of absolutely obliterating the others by himself from the left side.
The opposing team was lacking, not a single person was by the tall resurrection stone Madara approached. Although the stone was called a resurrection stone, it was more of a boundary and healing spot for the team it belonged too. It kept the other team from going past it and once one was destroyed, the overall health cap of the players would drop. The closer you got to the actual resurrection stone, the more the cap would drop.
Madara destroyed it without a sweat, the certain map they were playing on was an easy one for him. The paths were surrounded by woods, his personal favourite map included a small village. Given the title of the game, Konohagakure, often shortened to Konoha, most of the maps were in the woods or surrounded by greenery and trees. Soon after Madara got their first stone, a noise along with an alert notified him that the first right side stone of the opposite team was destroyed by Hashirama. He wasn’t really surprised.
“Must be playing grindy today, or, the other team really is just that bad…” Madara was a bit of a toxic player, he didn’t care. He kept going up the left side, not meeting a single enemy, he frowned deeper in disappointment. They were apparently holding the middle lane, repeatedly killing the fans on his team. Soon after, the team managed to get one of their own resurrection stones. Madara watched his health drop in annoyance and couldn’t help but open the team chat to send a few passive aggressive comments.
[6:53PM GHOST] Youre in the top 100 and really dont know how to not die at the same time?
Madara left his lane and went through the woods to the middle, using his gun for the first time while he was hiding in the shrubbery to eliminate one of the unsuspecting enemies as they continued down the path to the next stone. There was 3 per path, unless you played on an easier difficulty. You must destroy all of them to tear the barrier down. Once the barrier is down, all that’s left is to fully kill the other team once and the win is yours.
He was not the only one with this idea, as another one fell immediately after. He watched Hashirama’s character dart out of the opposite side of the shrubbery, Madara decided to follow his lead and together they ambushed the remaining characters. Both he and Madara easily cleared the resurrection stones on their respective paths, as this team was completely idiotic and didn’t know how to split the members up.
His teammates joined the two soon after and all five of them cleared the 3 stones in the middle, watching the barrier around the opposing team’s base fall down. It was, of course, a very quick victory. Madara still felt a little disappointed that it was too easy, as well as disappointed that Hashirama had not addressed him.
Until he received an in game message from the man himself.
[7:03PM SAGE] Are you available? Let’s play together, call me
[7:04PM GHOST] Streaming.
[7:04PM SAGE] I don’t mind if you don’t
Madara knows his chat has already seen the entire conversation so he can’t straight up decline it, although he would very much enjoy playing with Hashirama, he tries to word his declination as vaguely as possible. He thinks of what his chat said before that game.
[7:06PM GHOST] Actually, I might be playing a few unranked rounds with some fans. You were grinding. Do not let me stop you.
Madara really hopes that’s the end of it, but of course, Hashirama is too nice and just so damn oblivious, and this just makes Madara grip his mouse tightly.
[7:07PM SAGE] Let’s do it together, I have a lot of time. I wasn’t grinding btw :)
He really can’t deny the man now, he gives in, closes the chat box in game and opens the program he uses to talk with his friends. He calls Hashirama and the man answers immediately.
“Madara! Hello, and hello to your stream as well.” Madara hears Hashirama’s keyboard and mouse vaguely and he swallows, suddenly wanting to turn his webcam off.
“Hello Sage.”
“You’re too formal on air, Ghost.”
“Hello Hashirama,” Madara corrects himself in the most monotone voice he can summon in the moment. His heart is beating and the thought of his fan account appears in the back of his mind.
The stream chat is going fast, the duo is quite popular and fans of Hashirama are now joining to see them play.
“We’re playing against some people from your stream, unranked?” Hashirama asks and Madara can barely focus on his game anymore. He watches the chat scroll by too fast and makes a noise to agree. Hashirama continues, “2v2?”
“Yeah. That’s fine, unless you would like to do a 5v5,” Madara offers, figuring it would be better.
“5v5 is fun, dearest Ghost please start the party.” Hashirama is always enthusiastic, he can’t understand how an unranked 5v5 full of fans who are bound to be terrible is fun to any degree. He supposes he did this to himself though, his temples were already throbbing. At least it was unranked so nothing would happen to his account’s top 10 ranking. Not to show off or anything.
Madara clicks on the option provided to set up a custom match. He selects Hashirama’s name from his friend’s list and invites him to a party, watching as the game’s screen changes and shows their avatars together, along with 3 blank slots he must fill. There’s also 5 slots on the other team that are empty.
“Alright kids, let’s try to randomly select. Send your users, and yes, I am unfriending you right after the match.”
Hashirama laughs deeply, but Madara doesn’t know what’s funny.
“I’ll help too,” Hashirama supplies but Madara hears no clicking, he must already have the stream opened.
Madara scrolls through the endless spam and begins selecting them at random, quickly the teams are filled out with the help of Hashirama and he starts the match. The class selection screen appears and, as usual, Madara selects the attacker and locks in. After all select their class, the team spawns in.
“Oh-” Madara says, catching sight of the ever so familiar avatar of Sage’s. “Why did you go with healer? There’s no point in trying to heal anybody here.” His words are, as usual, monotone but somehow Hashirama finds them funny so he laughs again.
“I’ll be your personal healer this game, Madara,” he sings mischievously. If Madara’s face warms up slightly, he doesn’t address it.
“You are an idiot.”
“Actually, that’s not the first time I’ve heard that today.” He laughs again and Madara’s lips quirk up for a moment.
“Glad people are honest with you.”
The timer reaches 0 quickly, and his teammates (all of which are under level 50) unsurprisingly begin to follow Madara and Hashirama around.
“Can all of you- just…” Madara groans, this game would be too long like this. “Play correctly? I don’t have all day, and if I lose to a bunch of morons- no, if we make Hashirama lose to a bunch of level 30 losers, how can I face anybody again?”
He begins to shoot at the first resurrection stone on the left, all of the enemy team soon appears as they know Madara’s strategy and are most certainly still attending the stream. His team is shortly wiped out after, besides himself and Hashirama.
The resurrection stone is destroyed despite the opposing team's best efforts and Madara easily kills them all by himself. He moves on, hoping his team has learned, and he listens to the clicking of Hashirama’s keys over call.
“Hashirama?” Madara calls out slowly, not really knowing what it was that he wanted to say. He just wanted to talk with the man.
“Hmm?”
“I’m…” he trails off as they reach the stone and Madara once again begins shooting it down. This time, nobody shows up on either side and it’s destroyed within moments. “Why’d you want to join? Don’t you compete legitimately? Surely you have better things to do than sit around my livestream and play unranked.”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Hashirama asks, the two of their characters move towards the only stone left in their lane.
“No.”
“We’re friends, of course.”
“We a—?” He’s cut off by a bullet going through his avatar’s head, killing him instantly. Madara stares at his screen for a moment, only realising what’s happened when Hashirama breaks into laughter. “What the FUCK ??” he yells in anger.
The words 'We are?' remain unspoken.
“And before I go, I will give my daily fuck you’s. Fuck you to that sniper who got my head earlier, and an extra fuck you to our very own Sage who laughed the entire time afterwards. I hope you all have a horrible day, you too Hashirama, and I will see you whenever I decide I need to afford to eat again. Goodbye!” Madara smiles mockingly at the camera, and Hashirama who is still on call with him laughs, streaming cutting off midway. His chat floods with goodbyes, he closes the tab shortly after and sits back in his chair which lets out a horrible squeak.
“Madara you really gotta bring me along more.” He sounds like he’s probably wiping the tears from his eyes, Madara can envision it. He allows it this one time.
“So you can torment me the entire time? I think not. Anyways, I think it’s time for me to get off. My back hurts from this damn chair.”
“You’re no fun. We should hang out sometime, you’re in the same city as me right?” Hashirama continues the conversation despite Madara’s attempt at leaving.
“Maybe,” Madara says, truthfully he doesn’t want to meet Hashirama. He wasn’t sure he could handle it, if the other thought weirdly of him after meeting in person. In fact, they weren’t even close now, and Madara had a fan account of him for crying out loud. He was weird, and meeting felt a little too much. He frowned deeply.
“Well, I’ll drop everything for you. Just let me know.”
“That would be stupid of you, Hashirama. I’ll see you around.” And with that, Madara ended the call and stared at his monitor. His heart was throbbing, his face felt hot. What kind of words were those? I’ll drop everything for you? “Ridiculous,” he mumbles to himself and then drags his body out of the squeaky chair. He turns his computer off and goes to search for his phone that he left by his bed… somewhere.
It was laying under his bed, half dead, Madara brushes it off a bit and makes his way through his small apartment towards the area he calls his living room. He lays lazzily on the couch and turns his phone on, seeing a twitter notification. He suddenly recalls he left a good argument behind and his mood lifts a bit as he unlocks his phone and goes to his twitter notifications.
— “I think Sage himself would be very understanding of this superior opinion. You should think so too, seeing as you appear to know him so well Senjuice. His content is, again, not bad, but it’s overrated.”
Madara began to bite his fingernails as he thought for a reply. It really wasn’t dumb enough to have a full on argument about, but he just couldn’t stand it when his own fans did things like this. He would defend Hashirama until he died, but the man didn’t have to know that. In fact, he didn’t have to know a thing.
Overrated? Check your tastes, peasant, it’s Madara who’s overrated. He barely even talks during his streams, while Hashirama is great at talking as he works. He’s also nice to everybody, including your Madara, who would be very unhappy with your words. Clearly you don’t know a thing about the two.
Madara rants absentmindedly, just barely reaching the limit of words he could type. He really feels dumb for this argument but he started it, it would be against his… fan image to not have the last word. He sends the reply, stops biting his poor fingernail and goes to the person’s account once again. There were several new posts, most of which talking about his stream.
— “When he talks to Hashirama” (+4 images)
All of the photos were his reactions to certain things the other would say, when he would look away suspiciously and lowkey blush at the dumb words Hashirama would say. Madara really just couldn’t help it, he wanted to beat this person’s ass. He comments again, not caring if the other would realise he was stalking his posts. Madara was not a blushy person, he was not publically shy or whatever people want him to be.
...You really, truly are an idiot… What the fuck?
Immediately after, he gets the notification. ( Uchiwhore replied to your comment. )
— “Are you broken? That’s the only word you know how to say? It makes sense, you favour Hashirama afterall… Disappointing…”
The fuck? Madara was actually getting angry at his own fan. He sat up on his couch, aggressively tapping his phone’s keyboard.
Are you mentally well? What are you even implying with this post?
His phone buzzed, again an immediate reply. ( Uchiwhore replied to your comment. )
— “Are you losing your temper already?”
Fuck you. Fight me.
— “Okay, if you insist. Time and place.”
Do you play Konoha? I’ll kick your ass
— “I do, and I’m not too sure about that. DM me your user”
Madara realises what he’s gone and done a little too late. His notifications were filled with mutuals hyping them both up, he hadn’t realised Uchiwhore was one of the most popular fanaccounts of himself when he began the fight. Mutuals of the two began to argue who was going to win this spat. A few even @-ing Madara’s main account, as well as Hashirama’s.
He only had one spare Konoha account, he would have to pay 10 dollars to change the username but despite it all, he wanted to shame Uchiwhore into never returning again. Just the thought made it all worth it. He opened Konoha’s website on his phone, logged into the correct account and changed his username to Senjuice. He had no friends on the account, he only used it to play casual games when he felt up for it.
Switching back to twitter, he opened a DM with Uchiwhore.
[@ SENJUICE] senjuice.
read ✓
Madara unwillingly got back onto his computer, launched his game and logged into his alternate account. He already had the friend request, the account’s name was not Uchiwhore, but a series of numbers. He accepted it and created the private match before the other could. He set up the 1v1 and invited the account, who’s rank was very low. He scoffed, knowing this would be easy.
He started the round, picked the sniper class and opened the game chat to taunt the other a bit while the countdown went by.
[10:04PM SENJUICE] Ready to lose?
He even decided to add a smiley emoticon at the end, smirking to himself as he loaded his sniper rifle. He had perfect accuracy, but he prefered the fast aggressiveness of the attacker class. He had chosen the most basic map for this round, as he knew all the best spots for a sniper to hide at.
The countdown hit 0 and he immediately left his base, habitually heading to the left side. He hid in the trees, zooming in with his scope and hitting a few shots on the first stone he saw. He destroyed it, not knowing where the other was hiding at. He was probably wandering around the map lost. The notification of Madara destroying the first left side resurrection stone gave him away and he moved on to the next.
As he stalked through the wilderness, he thought of all the posts he’ll make rubbing it into Uchiwhore’s face. He had no idea that he was playing against his beloved idol, Madara himself, one who could be an esports champion if he was interested in joining a team. There was absolutely no way he could lose this round, he even had warm ups earlier.
Madara began confidently destroying the next stone, still a little suspicious nothing had happened. The idiot hasn’t come to fight him, nor’ has he begun destroying any of Madara’s stones. He couldn’t tell if this was a scheme or just an idiot pretending to know what to do. He approached the last left lane stone, as it was a 1v1 there was conveniently only two lanes. He shot it twice, before a bullet shot past his head and nearly scared Madara to death. He turned quickly, trying to find where the other was hidden but it was too late. Madara’s avatar was nailed directly in the forehead, dying instantly.
A headshot would kill a character immediately, and the further away from your base you were, the longer you would take to respawn. Madara watched as two of his stones were destroyed, he made it as the third one was broken to pieces in front of him. Snipers were not meant for close combat, but he was confident, headshotting the other and checking his health cap which had fallen over halfway.
It was a difficult choice, to get the other’s last left stone or go to the right where Uchiwhore would definitely begin destroying his last three stones. He gritted his teeth, and went left to grab the last stone. The opposing could at least have less health at that point, he didn’t meet the annoyance in the left lane and that was relieving but also excruciating at the same time.
The last left lane stone was destroyed, he began running through the woods to the right side to begin destroying the stones before the other could get them. He was a professional, for crying out loud, a top 10 player. Somebody that low of a rank… If it ever came out, it would be more than embarrassing. He would have to retire.
The first right lane stone, Madara destroyed it easily. The rush of adrenaline he felt as he neared the second one was great. Unfortunately, he began to feel paranoid, taking a few easy shots at the weak spot in the stone, it burst into pieces. As soon as he watched the rocks fall, he heard another gunshot and suddenly he was dead again.
Madara banged on his desk in anger, one of his stones gone soon after… Then another…. Madara respawned and ran out, meeting Uchiwhore’s avatar standing idly outside the barrier of his main base. There was only stone left on both sides, but Madara’s was only one shot away until his barrier fell. He watched Uchiwhore, the dirty bastard, taunt him as he missed a few shots around the stone on purpose.
Madara could do nothing as he once again watched his last right lane stone break and the barrier drop. He raised his scope, knuckles turning white from gripping the mouse so hard, and shot at the man. They shot and hit at the same time, only Madara couldn’t respawn.
He sat in shock as the LOST screen appeared in front of him. His mouth agape, even more so when he realised why the strategy felt so familiar… The bastard...
Copied Hashirama’s playstyle to taunt him!
Madara immediately closed his game, and at the same time he heard his phone begin buzzing. He bit down on nothing very hard, opening twitter only to see himself being mocked. Uchiwhore posted a screenshot of his winning screen.
— ""ready to lose" huh...? But why does it say WON on my screen? Maybe it's a bug."
He couldn't believe it, he had never been this mad in his entire life. He really felt like he was about to start shaking in rage. He, a top 10 worldwide player, lost to... to.... He wouldn't admit it. Madara decides that the only reasonable thing to do is to train his ass off and make sure it never. Happens. Again. He opens the comment section on the post.
Bitch boy . He presses backspace. At least I don't ... Presses backspace again. Instead, he takes it to private messages.
[@ senjuice ] Are you really not a top ranked player? Good play, fuck you 10000000x again but good play
[ @ Uchiwhore ] What're you talking about? Are YOU sure you aren't a ranked player? Good play as well. Let's play again sometime.
( Uchiwhore began following you. )