Archive of Our Own ^beta

People think I’m dumb. But I ain’t. I know what’s up. But I just can’t think on how to say it so great. And ain’t no way I can write that shit down. Words and letters always go all squiggly, like little worms on the sidewalk after it rains. And sometimes I can be like a bird and grab a few, but mostly they just curl up and die without meaning anything.

Boss says that’s a simile. He says a lot of stuff. But I like that word. It makes me think the words are smilin’ cause of how they make a picture. He’s got a fancy term for that too. Like my teacher the last year I went to school. She was always on about figurative language. First time I knew figure could be somethin’ other than a chick’s measurements. Like tits and ass and such. Or that Olympics stuff Kong likes but don’t want nobody knowin’ about. I get it though. It's sparkly. And the music is usually pretty excitin’. And the way those guys jump up in the air, it looks like they can fly.  Boss says Eiji can fly, but I don’t think he means skating.

I got Boss to take us all ice skating one time. Cause it was Kong’s birthday, but he was too embarrassed. Guppy said as how I was gonna get my ass shot asking somthin’ so stupid. But I ain’t stupid. I know when to ask Boss shit. Plus Skipper wanted to go. And Boss liked dotin’ on Skipper. He always said people should look out for little kids.

I offered to watch the secret. So’s Skip could skate, but Boss said as how he made other arrangements, so we all got to go that wanted to. Most of the gang don’t even know about Griff. But he’s dead now. And deep down, underneath the sad, I think Boss is relieved. And I hope he don’t feel guilty, but he probably does..

Eiji cried about it. I caught him at it. He said don’t tell Boss, like there’s anything ever happens around here that Boss don’t know about. But I get it. Weird little dude, but I get it. He don’t belong here with us criminals and derelicts. He says he got a nice family that’s got money to send him on a plane half way across the world. And he’s got that photographer dude too. He don’t need the gang like the rest of us. He ain’t here for money or safety or cause he ain’t got nowhere else to go. 

He’s here for Boss. He’s smitten all right, but I don’t think he knows it yet. Or maybe he thinks we’ll kick his ass if he’s a pansy or some shit. But I don’t care about that. None of us do. But me most ‘specially. See I know some shit. And what I know, it changes things. It made me watch Eiji real close when he first came. Cause Boss’s got a soft spot for kids that seem like they can’t look after themselves. And even though he seems like he ain’t got a heart most of the time, I know he does. And I know he can’t stand for innocent folks to get hurt.

I get why. Nobody never looked after him, none ‘cept maybe Nadia. Shorter’s just a kid too, so he don’t count. And Dino, I guess. But don’t nobody need that kinda lookin’ after. Boss said one time that part of him’s grateful ‘cause he was starvin’ ‘fore he went to Golzine. And I get that, man, I do. But even though Boss can fight like a fuckin’ super hero now, and knows three languages, and can like smell how old wine is or some shit, I don’t think it was worth it. ‘Cause I been here since the beginning, or near enough to it. Longer’n Alex. Hell, longer’n Shorter.

I remember Boss way back, when he was just a snot-nosed kid with a temper and a sense of justice. He saved my ass. Got the shit kicked outa him for his trouble too. I was thirteen which made him like twelve, I think. ‘Cause it was winter. And I finally couldn’t take bein’ Andy Laughlin no more. Andy was just some dumb idiot that failed all his classes ‘cause he couldn’t read. And nobody gave a shit. 

Well, ‘cept Miss Holburn. She was my teacher in second grade at PS239. I remember her. Her hair was always frizzy and comin’ outta her ponytail like a baby chimpanzee at the Bronx Zoo. And she was soft when she gave kids hugs. And she had stickers that smelled like grape. And she always gave us snacks and read us stories. And there was usually yellow cat hair on her sweater. She smelled like coffee. I never knew a grown up like her. I used to wish she was my Ma. But she wasn’t. She’s the only person ‘sides Boss and Kong I ever remember sayin’ I was pretty smart.

I remember she called my mom in to talk about some special test ‘cause she said she thought I had dyslexia or somethin’. Boss said she was most likely right, too. So maybe if Ma hadn’t been so strung out, she couldn’t keep track of which one of her brats I was, my life mighta been different. ‘Cept of the six of us, only me and Evie are even still alive. So there’s that. Anyway, it don’t matter. Cause expectin Ma to not be strung out wasn’t gonna do nothin’ ‘cept make you angry. 

But yeah, anyway, that night-- it wasnt’ that I didn’t know the streets. Just cause I decided to be somebody other than stupid, illiterate Andy don’t mean I didn’t know what’s what. I been going out pickin’ up for Ma and whatever boyfriend since I was like seven or eight. Cops don’t think little kids carry, but a suprisin’ number do. You only gotta worry if they got dogs if you’re a little kid.

Anyway, like I said, I been buyin’ drugs since forever. So I figured I knew how it worked well enough to survive sellin’. Runnin’s safer, but you gotta have a gang for that, and I didn’t. Some asshole didn’t like it, and pulled a gun on me. And then there was Boss. He was tiny back then. But he fought like some kinda beast, all claws and teeth. Like a lion, but little. Maybe that’s why he got the name Lynx.  I know Griffin gave him Ash, back before he went off to war and got turned into what he was.

I wanted to thank him, for saving my ass, but he just said no and to stay outta that alley ‘cause bad shit happened in there. 

I saw him around after that. His clothes were always too clean, too nice. But he moved like one of us. And he looked out for the kids on the street best he could. I saw him take a hit more’n once that wasn’t aimed at him. He’d disappear on the regular, but he always came back out. 

Next time I really talked to him was a couplea months later. Big, fatass Marvin grabbed me. He had nasty teeth man, and a grip like iron. And he laughed with this other fucker that was with him. I remember what he said. I’ll never forget it, ‘cause I asked Boss what he meant after, and it made my blood run cold, man. He said This one isn’t pretty, but he’s feisty. Papa said he has a client at the club that liked to tame his toys. What do you think? This hyperactive little shit seem like he fits the order? The other fatass started to nod, and then suddenly Boss just appeared like outa nowhere. But he didn’t come out swingin’ like before.

Instead he said “Marvin,” he said. “Can I play with him first?” And I didn’t know what he meant but I didn’t like the way he touched my hair with slithery fingers and a look on his face I ain’t seen outsidea porno. “I’ll let you watch.” He leaned in then and bit my fuckin’ ear! “You won’t mind, will you honey?” And then he grabbed my package and I jumped but he had a hold on me and all the time his hands movin’ just a little. And I was scared as shit and kinda disgusted and kinda turned on, cause only my hand had ever done that shit before, right? “I know you like to watch, Marvin. And I won’t tell. I promise I won’t tell.” He licked me again, and I could see Marvin’s pants bulgin’ “Come on Marvin. It will be so much fun.” And then Marvin sent the other guy to keep watch and he just whipped it out as Boss dragged me away and pushed me up against the wall. I thought about fightin’ but I couldn’t beat three of them. And I owed this scary blond kid with his hand on my ass, ok? Then he leaned in and put his mouth right up against my ear and said “The other end of the alley looks like a dead end but there’s a hole in the wall behind the dumpster. Run. And don’t look back.” Then he let out this loud, fake moan and shoved me toward the back of the alley.

I ain’t proud of how fast I ran or how I didn’t look back even when I heard Boss cry out in pain. But there it is. So now I owe him twice over, maybe more. And I just… Look I get why Boss don’t let folks touch him. Cause I knew what Marvin did to him. And I knew it wasn’t the only time.

Shorter knew. I think maybe Alex. He said he would owe Boss forever for getting him outta the club. And I don’t know what club, but I got ideas, ok? And he ain’t as vicious as Boss, but Alex don’t like bein’ touched either. And only time I ever saw him really lose his cool was when the guys tried to give him a handle and he flipped the fuck out and said he wasn’t never gonna let nobody call him anything but his own name again. Only time I ever saw Boss touch somebody who wasn’t Eiji or Shorter willingly ‘cept to punch them. He just pulled Alex into a hug and let him shake till he was done.

Those of us that was there? We don’t talk about it. But I think Alex knows more’n he lets on, ‘cause he used ta get real cagy around Marvin too. And he’d been to that huge fuckin’ mansion with Boss. And Boss wouldn’t let anybody else go. Alex says it’s cause he don’t want us to see. He won’t say see what, but I know.

So yeah. Boss’s gotta thing about protecting kids. He don’t let it be known, much. Cause it’s stupid to let your rivals know you got any soft bits to ya at all. And you wouldn’t know Boss wasn’t made a marble or fuckin’ iron just to look. He don’t smile much. And when he does, it usually means to run for cover. ‘Cause that smile? It means the Green-Eyed Devil is comin’ out to play. And you don’t wanna be in the way.

He ever smiles at me like that, I’m just gonna pull my piece and hope he shoots me. We got history, so I know he’ll drop me where I stand. Boss ain’t like some others. He don’t hold with torture and shit.

He smiles at Eiji though. 

Boss says Eiji’s one of us now. He don’t got a gun. I guess Boss gave him one, but Shorter took it. Back before they went to California to look for Banana Fish, which I don’t know a goddamned thing about, so don’t ask. I may see more than most folks think, but I also know when to whistle in the dark and not see what’ll get my ass killed. So I won’t be sayin’ nothin’ about no drug and no crazy-ass plot to take over the government or some shit. As far as I know, Boss just needed a vacation after Griffin died. 

Sing knows. And his eyes don’t look right no more. Like he’s seen shit he can’t unsee.

Eiji don’t look like that though. He’s so different. He ain’t no spy though. I thought he was, for a while. Cause why else would he stick here when he’s got people? I mean Boss said he stays, so I wasn’t never gonna argue. I need all the teeth I got left. 

I know Boss says he’ll fix up my mouth. He was real sorry after. But I know not to startle a wild animal. Hell, a raccoon in a dumpster can fuck you up. A sleepy Lynx’ll kill your ass. ‘Sides, them teeth weren’t great before he punched me. My Ma’s boyfriend knocked ‘em loose when I was a kid ‘cause I spilled his beer, and they weren’t never right after that. Least this way, they don’t hurt no more. So he don’t need to fix it. 

And I learned my lesson. 

I remember when I tried to warn Eiji. He was new then. He didn’t know how things worked. Boss said wake him up. But he needs to sleep. He don’t sleep enough. And Skip used to tell me some of the shit he used to yell in his sleep. Not all the guys. Skip was good at keepin’ private things private. But I sat with Griffin sometimes while Boss was sleepin’, so he thought I should know so’s I didn’t get my ass shot or something. I never saw him yell, but I don’t doubt Skip’s words.  I don’t guess I’m all that surprised. But Eiji didn’t know any of that. He didn’t know that Boss would wake up later and bang some heads together, but that was safer than touching him without him knowing. Same if you make a funny noise or get too loud or too close.

We all know to keep it quiet and keep our distance.

The guys think it’s temper, but it ain’t. It’s fear. He’s been caught sleeping a couple too many times maybe, or had to sleep too many places that wasn’t safe. He wakes up ready to kill. 

But Eiji just shakes him awake. Full on slaps his shoulder. Little dude ain’t quiet when he moves. He’s light on his feet, but you can tell he ain’t had to sneak past worse than a sleeping parent or a nosey neighbor. I figure that’s what saved his life, or at least his nose. Cause Boss didn’t punch him. Didn’t even pull his gun. Just got up and went to shower. 

And then Eiji just waltzes into the bathroom to take him the soap like just anyone is allowed to see him. I think that’s when the gang realized there was something different about him. Different like special instead of just weird. Cause Boss didn’t even throw nothin’ at him when he went in. And I think I heard him say thanks.

I don’t know if Eiji saw. I ain’t dumb enough to get close enough to get noticed. Look. We all got knife scars. It’s just how it is, fightin’ for position. And most of us got a bullet hole or two. Even Eiji’s got one of those now. Well, sorta, but we’ll count it, cause if he gets shot for real, Boss is gonna burn this city to the fuckin’ ground. But he don’t like people knowing ‘bout the burn scars. Not even Alex or Shorter or Me. Golzine useta put out his cigars on Boss’s back. Made a design like the letter D. Each time one would heal, he’d make a new one so’s Boss’s back always hurt. Boss said once when he was drunk that it was maybe better than the club, but Alex said he don’t think so. 

Shorter had to leave when he saw. I don’t know if he went to cry or to puke. Either woulda made sense. They’re old now and pretty faded. You can’t see the letter no more. But Boss knows they’re there. And he don’t like people seein’. That’s when I decided that I’d keep an eye on Eiji. Cause Boss let his guard down around him. 

I ain’t his second. I don’t mind. I ain’t suited. Too squirrelly. I get it. Plus Alex can read real good and can do some shit I never learned. But Boss is my boss and I didn’t intend to see him get shanked by some sweet lookin’ Japanese kid.

Look, everybody’s wrong sometimes. And I was wrong. But that’s why I started keepin’ an eye out. Cause Boss always said if you feel a suspicion in your gut, you gotta assume there’s a reason. And look. He went with Boss and Shorter and they came back without Shorter, and Boss punched fuckin’ Sing for even tryin’ to talk about it. And they didn’t even tell Alex the sorta shit that went down. 

But somethin’ sure happened. Cause all of a sudden we’re babysitting Eiji and treatin’ him like he’s one of us. At first we all thought he was soft. Like maybe Boss just needed somebody to take care of after Skip bit it. And those of us that knew about Griffin knew he lost two people to care about. And with Shorter dead too. It woulda made sense. Boss pretends like he don’t, but he likes taking care of people. It’s why every single one of us would face bullets for him, risk ourselves to save him when we could just follow Alex as the next boss instead. He takes care of us. And he don’t waste lives. 

Not all of us can say that feeling with words. Kong says it’s family, but I got a family and it ain’t like this. Still, even without the words for it, we know it. It’s how he got such a big gang with all different colors and races and shit. ‘Cept no Chinese cause he wouldn’t take any guys from Shorter. But we got Koreans and Vietnamese. And hell, Sing’s practically Boss’s guy at this point. If Lao would shut the fuck up, we’d probably join or somethin’. Though come to think of it, I doubt the Lees would like that. And Boss won’t bow to the Lees. 

He gets pissed if we let Golzine push us around too. But we ain’t him, and Golzine is a fucking Mafia Don, not a bunch of street punks with nowhere else to go. 

So I been watchin’. And I noticed some things. I noticed how Eiji wasn’t afraid of Boss. Not even a little. And he don’t call him Boss. He calls him Ash. And once Aslan--like the fuckin’ lion from those movies. Boss didn’t like Aslan. But he smiles sometimes when Eiji says Ash. I thought about tryin’ it. Shorter useta do it. But I can’t make my mouth say the word. He ain’t Ash. He’s Boss. And he ain’t my friend like he was Shorter’s. I know who is in charge. And I’m fine with it. 

Ok, so the thing is, Boss isn’t soft. But ‘Ash’ is, when Eiji’s around. He stands close to Eiji, touches his arm when he talks to him. He takes mornings off sometimes to walk in Central Park with Eiji or take him to see the Statue of Liberty. And once he had an extra beer and laid his head on Eiji’s shoulder, right there in the bar where all the guys could see. Zephyr started to whistle, but I shut that shit down right quick. Boss looked sleepy, but I think Eiji’s eyes held more danger. 

I heard him later, with his funny accent and his strange way of picking his words. “He is a human person, not a block of ice. And he is tired. Let him rest. Or I won’t make you any more cookies.” And fuckin’ Zeph backed down. And Eiji just did shit like that. All the time. He made us dinner and washed the blood outa our clothes. He could bandage a sprain better than Boss. He kept waking Boss up without worryin’ about it. Hell, he useta tease us about being big, scary gang members afraid of a sleepin’ kitten.

I shit you not. Eiji called fuckin’ Ash Lynx a kitten and lived to tell the tale. Cause he mighta thought Boss was sleepin’, but I heard him chuckle. Boss don’t laugh often. But he laughed then. By then, I knew Eiji wasn’t no spy, but he was fascinatin’, so I kept watchin’. I think Kong’s feelin’s were hurt for a little bit, on account of him bein’ my best friend since forever. But look, I wasn’t in the market for a new best friend. And I don’t swing that way, so’s I wasn’t lookin’ to court nobody either. Plus, it was subtle, but it was clear. Eiji belonged to Boss. Weren’t nobody gonna tempt him away. And I don’t wanna face Boss when he’s feelin’ betrayed and angry even if Eiji had eyes for anybody else. Which he don’t.

So I took Kong out for a beer, and I told him alls I seen. And he said he noticed somethin’ too. And I felt like I really was dumb when he said it, cause it was fuckin’ huge man. Eiji can come up behind Boss. Like from his blind spots. And Boss can tell his step, which isn’t the huge part, cause he can do that with all of us. The huge part was that Boss didn’t even turn to check. He just let Eiji come all up close behind him, and touch his back or arms or hair. And he didn’t flinch or draw or even bitch about sneakin’. Sometimes, if it was only inner circle there, he’d even smile, or close his eyes for a second.

And so when he bought that crazy ass apartment on the ritzy side of town, I didn’t surprise me none, that he kept Eiji close. I was a little surprised that he let him sleep in the same bedroom. Not that they shared a room, but that so many guys knew. Not the whole gang, but more than inner circle. Of course there was two beds. And Boss would share sometimes when there weren’t no real choice. But that was their room. Plural. 

And. Well.

There was rumors. And all kinds a speculation about what was goin’ on. Folks didn’t seem mad, just surprised. Boss had a girl-friend once, but mostly he don’t do that shit. Ain’t none of my business. But I remember about Marvin, and Golzine didn’t fuckin’ brand him for no reason. And maybe he just didn’t like it no more. Alex don’t really date much, neither. Though he’s got a girl now. So maybe I’m just talkin’ outa my ass. 

Kong and Alex shut down most of the talk. Said it weren’t none of our business. Alex said it was so the second room could be a place for us guys to crash. Which makes sense. Boss don’t like Eiji sleepin’ rough with the gang. And we got some dangerous dudes here, so maybe that’s just common sense.

But I think Eiji could hold his own. And Kong thought the rumors are right, at least a little. Cause sleepin’ in the same room meant somethin’. And touchin’ like that meant somethin’ too. 

I guess Boss knew what was up, cause the guys that didn’t care about them sharin’ got put on Eiji duty. We wasn’t to ever let him leave the apartment alone. And we was to get him whatever he needed. And we was to keep him company if he wanted it but to leave him alone if he didn’t. Boss was fussin’. And Boss don’t fuss.

And there we were, just noddin’ and tryin’ ta keep our mouths from floppin’ open in shock, and sayin Yes Boss over and over. And Eiji interrupts him. “It will be fine, Ash,” he said like it was normal for him to just talk instead of waiting. “I’m sure they will be perfect gentlemen.”

And Boss turns to him, and I’m like “here goes.” 

But he don’t yell or glare or nothin’.  Instead he just says, with a little pink in his cheeks, mind you. “I don’t like leaving you alone. I’d stay if I could, but there are things only I can do. I--if you’re ready, I can get ahold of Ibe. I can send you somewhere safe.” Like he was askin’. Not tellin.’ Askin.’

And Eiji said no he would stay. And that was that. Eiji went to cook dinner, and Boss gave us our assignments. And then Boss says that all of us in the highrise all the time would arouse suspicion. And then he threw everyone out and told me and Kong to come back at sunset, and that was that. 

After that, Boss mostly guarded Eiji himself in the mornings till he had to leave. And then me and Kong took over. Not always us. Alex came some. And Guppy and Stinger and Blackjack. But mostly Kong and me. And when Boss got home late, we crashed in the extra room sometimes.

Now Kong sleeps like the dead, but me? I’m hyper even in my dreams and I hear shit and it wakes me up. So I hear this yellin’ in the middle of the night and I figure Boss will shoot somethin’ important if Eiji gets hurt, so I go to check. And I hear crying. And that don’t seem right. So I go a little closer, and I expect like I’ll hear it’s Eiji cryin’ right? Only it’s not. Boss is laying flat out on Eiji’s lap and cryin’ like a little kid. And Eiji’s sayin’ stuff about bein’ hurt and bein’ safe here with him. And I know when things ain’t for my ears, so I backed the hell outa that one. 

But when I went back, they was sleepin’ like little kids at a slumber party, all curled up with each other. I remember thinkin’ Oh-so it’s like that.

But then it wasn’t. Not for a while anyway. And I wondered. Cause sometimes Kong hugs me when I’m hurtin’. And it don’t mean I wanna screw him. So I figured I was just jumpin’ to conclusions cause by then it was pretty obvious Eiji was in love with Boss, even if he hadn’t figured it out yet.

I knew he was sheltered, but damn. He don’t even watch porn.

I was careful for a while to make sure I didn’t catch ‘em in the act. Like some things are just things you don’t wanna overhear. And Boss gettin’ laid is one of them. Only I never heard nothin like that. Not for so long I stopped thinkin’ I would.

I mean I heard all kindsa shit, but not that. Ya know? 

I heard Eiji laugh one time when I was grabbin’ a snack. And then Boss asked what he said and Eiji laughed harder and said “You just asked if you were a fish.” It made me smile hearin’ Boss say to tell him again how it went.

And another time I swear I heard Boss say to tell him more about the god of toilets. 

I heard some serious stuff too. Like one time, I heard Boss say “Don’t call me your best friend. I shot the last person who called me that straight through the heart.” And then Eiji said “Oh Ash.” And Boss said “I mean it.” And Eiji said “What should I call you then?” And Boss said “What do you want to call me?” And I could like hear the smile in his voice, right? But then Eiji laughed a laugh that had me scurryin’ away.

And another time I heard Eiji say he wished he coulda heard Griff tell stories like that.

It wasn’t that I was tryin’ to listen. I just notice stuff sometimes is all. 

It took a bit of time for me to realize that Boss wasn’t guardin’ Eiji in there. Like longer than it shoulda taken me. Cause Boss don’t make mistakes much less laugh about ‘em. And he don’t talk about Shorter or Griff. ‘Cept with Eiji. Cause once the door closed, and Eiji turned the lock, Boss wasn’t Boss no more. He was just Ash. Cause he got to be a person with Eiji like he wasn’t with us. And I don’t think I ever thought of bein’ jealous. I was just glad, ya know? Cause you can’t follow Boss and not love him just a little bit.

I never told no one but Kong the stuff I heard. Not even tell Alex, cause like, nobody had the right to hear that shit. And the guys would talk. And I was afraid if it got out, either Boss wouldn’t let himself do it no more, or he’d shoot the guy that ruined it. 

And that guy woulda been me. 

‘Sides, I was pretty sure nothin’ was happenin’ in there that wasn’t PG13 teasing and shit.

All the rumors died out, and the amount of fightin’ ramped up, and none of us had time to wonder what they got up to when they were all alone, anyway. So I wasn’t thinkin’ when I went to Eiji duty early. Kong was gonna go get Twinkies on the way, cause Eiji’d never tried them and that, my friend, is a crime against humanity. And I got a key, so I’m supposed to just let myself in. 

It wasn’t my fault is what I’m sayin’. But I open the door and instead of being not-quite cuddled on the couch or sittin’ at the table readin’ like always,  they’re up against a wall kissin’ like they ain’t gonna get another chance. And Boss has got one hand pushin’ up Eiji’s shirt and strokin’ his back. And Eiji’s got his arms up around Boss’s neck, and I think he’s even got a few fingers in his hair, and I’m just standin’ in the doorway gapin’ like one of them Halloween ghosts with their mouths open in a big silent scream.

And then Boss looked up at me and when he made eye contact I was sure I was gonna die. He’s usually cold, but he don’t look at his own guys with that kinda fury. But then Eiji put his lips on Boss’s neck and he turned back to what he’d been doing, and I bolted. I met Kong and dragged him to the park until I got a text from Boss that said it was time for my shift.

I didn’t say nothin’ to nobody. But I think Kong told Alex, cause he slapped me on the back a few days later and told me “Sorry dude. I’m glad you made it out alive though.” And I wasn’t in the firefight, so I figure that’s what he meant.  

It’s been funny, since then. Cause I’m pretty sure Eiji just doesn’t give a fuck who knows, but Ash remembers Cassie from way back and how some goons killed her for liking him. And he’s like crazy protective. But I still overhear stuff, like EIji sayin’ as how Boss needs to relax, like his own guys won’t hurt nothin’. And Boss pulls him in close, like him touchin’ people is just somethin’ he does, and he kisses the side of Eiji’s mouth and says all soft, “I can’t lose you, Eiji. I just can’t.”

And Eiji is all like “Oh, Ash. I will stay by your side forever.” Just like a fuckin’ romance movie. And Boss ain’t tried to send him away for a long time now, and I kinda wonder what’s gonna happen. 

I thought sure all hell would break loose when Sing figured it out. He caught Boss in the hall and just flat out said he was happy for him and Eiji, just like it was something normal to say and not putting his life on the line. And THEN, like a munchkin with a death wish, he kept talking. “Shorter would have been happy for you too.” He said. Just like that. 

And it was true, too. But that ain’t the point. Cause Shorter ain’t a topic you just bring up with Boss neither. ‘Specially when he’s stressed. Like trying to take out something way bigger than him can make ya stressed… Bus Sing’s been kinda cocky since the whole thing with Arthur, and the kid’s gettin’ mouthy. And I can’t say much, ‘cause he’s a boss and I’m not. But Boss just smiled and said thanks. And I think the world might be comin’ to an end or some shit, but then nothin’ happened at all. 

Boss is filin’ down his edges a little. He ain’t so sharp no more. And that’s all EIji. I ain’t never seen anything like it.

But it’s good. It’s good. 

I ain’t got Sing’s guts. I ain’t gonna say nothin'. But I’m happy for him too.