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“River.”
His name was a whisper on her lips, a salve she applied to herself, a verbal reminder of the one piece of support she still had in this city. Thinking of him gave her strength; she pictured the glint of the chrome where an eye used to be, the musty smell of the fur lining of his trench coat, the way he never wavered or hesitated when he touched her. She thought of him and found the willpower to get up off the ground, where the overheat attack had landed her, and to finish this fucking netrunner once and for all.
V huddled behind some crates and peered into the shadowy corners of the store room, taking stock of the surroundings, then ducked back. There’s a bunch of computers, monitors, and other equipment in the corner. The netrunner wouldn’t have strayed far. V pulled up her sniper rifle and quietly reloaded it.
She sat.
She breathed.
Then she heard it, the rustling of a body trying to be stealthy and failing terribly. V listened for a moment and estimated the netrunner’s location. Readied her sniper rifle. She peeped around the corner and saw it, a quick flash of white suit moving behind a partition. Eye to scope, she trained her weapon on the side of the partition she expected the enemy to emerge from.
She didn’t have to wait long. The netrunner was going for the computers. There’s a flurry of movement and a loud BANG from V’s own gun that echoed in her ear, and then silence.
V found the netrunner in a puddle of her own blood. Part of her head was just gone, missing. V looked at the corpse with clinical curiosity. The blood pooled around the body, staining the white jumpsuit. V stepped over it to rifle through the shelves and cases by the computers, until she found it. A shard, important to somebody, for some reason. V stopped listening when Regina was explaining. She pocketed it and turned to leave.
The netrunner’s body lay prone. The blood has stopped flowing. V tried to remember how she felt the first time she killed someone and couldn’t. Was it normal to feel this empty? It had to be, to be a merc, right?
V thought again of River. His half-smile that lits up his whole face. She unconsciously mirrored it while looking at the dead body in front of her.
Her mobile ringing brought her to attention. V looked at it - Regina. She rolled her eyes - how impatient this woman could be. V answered it.
“Well? Is the job done?”
“Regina, didn’t anyone ever tell you patience is a virtue?”
“You’re the quickest merc I have on my payroll, V,” she snorted. “And I’ll take that as a yes.”
V shook her head as she walked past the dead netrunner, introspection forgotten, and headed for the door. “Yes, I’ll bring it your way.”
“Just use a drop point,” Regina shrugged. “I’ll send your payment through.”
Regina clicked off unceremoniously.
“Always a pleasure,” V said to the dead air in Regina’s wake.
She registered the money hitting her account as she left the store room, not bothering to look back at the mess she left behind.
Another job well done.
***
V was splayed out on her couch, eating buck-a-slice, mindlessly watching the news. Arasaka this, Arasaka that. It seemed like ever since Mikoshi, the company was constantly in the headlines. Yorinobu - the sad, lone heir to the Arasaka family name after the dual tragedies of losing his father and sister - was doing a lot of restructuring to the company. Despite everything that had happened, and despite the ticking clock above her own head, V just couldn’t bring herself to care anymore.
Bzzt.
V checked her mobile - a text from River.
[You’ve been quiet lately.]
V’s bite of pizza turned to flavorless mush in her mouth. She swallowed it hastily. She knew she’d eventually have to come clean with River. But she’d been putting it off, just wanting to enjoy the time she had left without a dark cloud hanging over things. But River was perceptive, of course. A cop turned PI.
[Yeah..] V sent back, a whopper of a response. She waited to see what he would say next.
[Can I come over?]
Fuck. He wants to talk.
[Of course. Any time, River. You know that.] V sent back.
Beat.
Beat.
[There soon.]
V sighed and closed her eyes. She knew exactly how long it took him to get to her door. 6 minutes and 37 seconds. She’d timed it, and although she’d never traveled the trip exactly with him, she could picture it in her mind: River’s saunter down the driveway, to the road, and up to the dataterm. The several seconds he would take to orient himself on the map, and to remember which megabuilding she lived in. The click, the transfer,the short walk to her unit. The moment standing outside her door to roll his shoulders and clear his throat.
River was the most predictable person that V had ever met, and he unintentionally gave her the stability she didn’t know she’d craved. She thought she loved merc life: becoming a legend, bullets flying and making eddies. And then River deposited himself right in her path, a weathered, heavy, unrelenting boulder, and somehow it was the best thing that had ever happened to her.
There was a knock. V checked her watch - 7 minutes, 3 seconds. Extra time spent at the door preparing himself, then. Running his mind over what he wanted to say.
V went to the door and opened it. Reflexively, she smiled at him. Tall and wide, filling the door frame in a larger than life way. She needed to introduce him to Misty; V didn’t know shit about auras but she was sure River’s was solid, unblemished, dark and cool, just like him.
“Come in,” she said, stepping back to allow him entry.
River gave her a peck on the cheek. “How you doing?”
V shrugged and flopped onto the couch. “Can’t complain,” she said. “And yourself? Everything okay?”
River carefully removed his trench coat and draped it over the end of the couch before settling down himself, close to V, but not close enough to touch.
“Got my third PI client last week,” River grinned. “Still working the case, pretty straight forward corpo espionage stuff. Nothing fancy.”
“Not fancy? Get out of here, a corpo client is fancy as fuck,” V grinned.
River shrugged and rubbed a hand across the back of his neck. “Maybe you’re right, I dunno. Not my ideal kind of case. But I gotta build up a reputation, you know?”
“Yeah, it takes time. But you’ll be the most in-demand PI in all of Night City before you know it.”
River ducked his head at that. Praise always made him feel slightly uneasy, but V knew he deserved it, so she tried to lay it on him whenever she could.
“How’s Panam?” River asked, changing the subject.
“She’s good. She’s in Tucson now, her and the Aldecaldos.” V looked out the window at the sea of buildings and grey sky that stretched beyond. “Once in a while I think maybe I shoulda taken her up on the offer to get outta here, but…”
“But you couldn’t leave the city.”
V inclined her head in agreement. “Or you,” she added.
River shook his head a little. “You’d think if you were here for me you’d come around more often,” he said plainly, locking eyes with her.
V winced. It sounded like a mean statement on the face of it, but River was never mean. He was just honest. Unflinchingly, lovingly honest.
“I’m sorry River, I know,” V said. She opened her mouth and closed it again. She had to tell him. Had to. But she knew as soon as she did, things would fundamentally change, and that’s why she’d started to push him away.
“What is it V?”
She looked into his brown, unchromed eye. “I have something to tell you. Somethin’ big.”
River nodded slowly and straightened up, preparing for the blow, obviously having expected something like this. V imagined he thought she was just gonna break up with him, or something equally inane.
“I’m dyin’, River. I’ve only got a few months left to live.”
River’s face changed from stolid to confused in a heartbeat. “Dying? But - you said Johnny was gone. That the AI had separated his construct from you.”
“She did.” V swallowed. “But- the damage, from the nanites. It was too much, I’m too far gone. My body is attacking itself.”
“I don’t believe it. Have you seen Vik?”
“Yeah, of course,” V said. “He gave me some meds. They’re helping with side effects, maybe slowing the process a little. But it’s inevitable.”
She could see River clenching his jaw, working out what he was going to say. V wanted to reach out and hold his hand, but she thought he would shake her off. So instead she sat and waited for him to gather his thoughts.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” was the eventual question he constructed.
“Cause, River - I didn’t want to ruin this. I wanted my last months on this plane of existence to be good, you know?” For the first time, V felt close to tears. She hadn’t cried over dying this entire screwed up time, but now, having to confront River with it, she felt a lump forming in her throat.
“I deserved to know.”
“I know,” V whispered, unable to summon more of her voice.
River got up and walked to the window. He leaned against it, staring outside as the sun slipped below the horizon of buildings, casting the sky in an orange-pink hue. Eventually, he spoke.
“I knew there was something wrong,” he said quietly. “I just wish you let me in sometimes, V.”
“I don’t know how to do that very well,” V replied, wiping away the dampness at her eyes. “Letting people in has always backfired on me.”
River turned and leaned against the window. V couldn’t make out his features well against the light coming in the window. She looked down at her hands instead.
“A few months?” The pain in his voice made V cringe.
“Yeah, best guess,” she replied quietly.
“Then I guess we better make the most of it.”
V looked up in surprise. “Huh?”
“If a few months is all I get, then I’m going to get all I can.” River crossed the room and sat next to V, his leg astride hers. “I can see what you’re doing. Pushing me away to protect me. Or yourself. Or - both of us.”
V raised an eyebrow slightly. The man wasn’t exactly wrong.
“I won’t let you die alone, V.” River grabbed her hands with his and squeezed. “Promise me.”
“Promise you what?”
“That you’ll let me be there with you. That I won’t find out you’re gone from the screamsheets.”
V felt a punch of emotion to the gut like she’d never felt before. Someone wanted to be with her when she died? In all her musings of the future - granted, one far in the future, where she had grey hair - she died alone in a bed, her only company the Pacific Dreams radio station.
“Is that really what you want?” she asked.
“The fact that you have to ask tells me I haven’t done a very good job of showing you how I feel about you,” River said. The pain in his voice was still there, but he smiled. V knew she didn’t deserve him.
“Then yeah, of course you can,” V said. “I don’t - I don’t want to be alone…”
River dropped her hands in order to cup her face, his thumbs lightly stroking her cheeks, absentmindedly following the lines of her chrome. He pulled her close, met her lips with his. They kissed and it quickly turned insistent and wild, a desperation from both parties to communicate their innermost feelings without having to use more words. V knew that River loved her, he’d said as much. V wasn’t sure if what she felt was love; didn’t even know if she was capable of that emotion. But what she knew was that she’d never felt that way about anyone before River; not even Johnny.
But V’s thoughts faded away into background noise as the two of them started to shed layers of clothing and the kissing progressed to more.
***
V stared at herself in the bathroom mirror. She watched in detached fascination as a drop of blood slowly slid its way down her upper lip, catching in the creases, fanning out to her lower lip. Most of her life had been awash in blood: others’, mostly.. her own sometimes. Before it had just been a fact - blood comes out of people, and if too much comes out, they die. Nothing else to it.
But looking at herself, feeling her moments left on Earth ticking down and away, she could feel it deeper than that. Blood was life itself, the force that let her function, move, jump, shoot, kill. It was what gave her stomach the fuel to grumble loudly when she walked past a noodle place and the scent of dashi hit her nose. Blood was what boiled under the surface of her skin when River was close to her, a fire that burned wherever he touched her, that telegraphed her feelings from the inside out.
V turned on the faucet and washed her face. The blood droplets swirled in the water and down the drain. She looked up again at her reflection, at her clean face, and it was as if nothing had happened.
“You’re okay,” she told her reflection. She pulled out a bottle of pills from Vik and popped one. Slipped the bottle back into one of her many pockets.
“You’re o-kay.” V repeated.
The reflection seemed unconvinced.
***
They were lounging on the bed together, V having wrapped herself around River as he lay sprawled out. She flicked at his dangly earring while he read through his messages. He’d finished a case yesterday and the requests for his services had piled up in the meantime.
“You’re in demand these days,” V said quietly. Proudly.
“It’s partially thanks to you,” River said, turning his attention to her. V flicked his earring one last time then laid her hand on his chest.
“I think you’re overestimating my influence in Night City.”
“Nah,” River said. “You’re infamous, V. And word’s gotten around that we’ve worked together.”
V considered that. “If my legacy in this city is that I’ve given a leg up to the best damn PI I’ve ever known, then I can live with that.”
River’s expression clouded over. “We’ll see about that legacy.”
“Huh?” V asked.
“Nothing,” River said, and he rolled over, covering V’s body with his own. He looked down at her, and they locked gazes. V felt the weight of his body on her own and it was warm and comforting. She found herself living for the moments like this. She gave him a kiss, and he returned the affection eagerly, and V more or less forgot about his statement. Being with River always drove everything from her mind, as all she could think about was the man in front of her.
After a few minutes, River pulled back, sighed happily and buried his face in V’s hair. “I love you,” he mumbled.
V said nothing, but she smiled. She never returned the sentiment, but it didn’t matter to River. He said it because he felt it, not because he expected her to say anything back. She closed her eyes and nuzzled her face against his neck, content.
“I think I’m gonna carve out a niche for my PI biz,” River said, changing the subject. He rolled over and sat up, stretching his arms. V laid back and admired the rippling of the muscles in his back as he did so.
“What niche?” V asked. She pulled the blankets around herself to fight against the absence of warmth that he left behind.
River paused for a second. “Kidnapping.”
V nodded. “That’s the case you just closed, yeah? The corpo’s kid.”
“Yeah,” River said, talking as he got dressed. “I don’t mind the cases I’ve been doing, pays the bills. But I felt - energized, I guess. I felt accomplished afterwards, in a way I hadn’t realized I was missing.”
“Ever since Randy,” V surmised.
River pulled down his shirt and turned back to face her. “Yeah, I guess so. I mean, anybody can investigate a cheating spouse or find stolen property. But…”
“But not everyone knows what it’s like to have a missing loved one,” V finished for him.
River smiled. “You get me.”
“Always,” V said.
River sat on the edge of the bed. He picked up her hand and entangled his fingers with hers. “Hey, how’ve the headaches been lately? The nosebleeds?”
V raised her eyebrows at the change of topic. She considered lying, but she’d promised herself she wasn’t going to do that anymore. Not to River, anyway. “Gotten a bit worse, actually. Just more frequent.”
River nodded and turned her hand over, examining it. V suddenly felt like she was at Misty’s place, and River was trying to find her lifeline or something.
“Okay. You just stick to the meds Vik gave you.” River put her hand back down.
“You got it, hefe,” V grinned.
“I got some work to do, okay? I’m gonna go to my office and get out of your hair for a bit.”
V snuggled deeper into the bed as River readied himself to leave. “Think I might nap for a bit,” she said.
“You do that. Don’t get takeout tonight. I’ll make dinner.”
“I can’t wait,” V said, and she meant it.
***
River had been acting kind of.. off, lately. V couldn’t put her finger on it. But he was terrible at lying and hiding things, and she could tell he was doing one or the other. Hell, maybe both.
They continued their routine and the moments they shared felt as genuine as ever. But sometimes she would walk into cut-off conversations or he would have a reason for rushing out the door that sounded made up.
V knew he wasn’t cheating, no way. River would sooner jump off the top of Arasaka tower than betray anyone he cared about that way. Which sucked, because that meant something was going on that was far more serious. V could handle River having some side affair, or visits with a joytoy. But whatever he was into, could be worse than that. His life could be in trouble. Or his family’s.
V decided to get to the bottom of it. She waited outside the small building his rented office space was in. She could occasionally see his shadow in the window, up on the third floor, as he moved around. Hunkered behind a dumpster, she watched his window patiently for hours, until he finally clicked off the light and left. She observed him as he stepped out of the front door, looked back and forth down the street, before walking around the corner to his truck and hopping inside. V stayed hunkered down, waiting for his truck to drive down the street and out of sight. She gave it another 5 minutes, then left her hiding spot. She quickly sprinted across the street and into the alcove for the door. A quick hack job and she was in past the front door.
It wasn’t a very populated building, just a collection of offices and meeting rooms for rent on a weekly or monthly basis. V decided to skip the elevator and took the stairs two at a time. She came to River’s office, a familiar sight. Bare metal door with “RIVER WARD, PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR” emblazoned on the front in gold-colored paint. V didn’t need to hack into his office, she knew his code. He had willingly given it to her - he trusted her.
V winced inwardly slightly at that thought. But she needed to figure out what was going on. She suspected River needed her help, and either was being coerced not to involve her, or was afraid of her getting hurt. She had her money on the latter.
V slipped inside, the door softly whooshing to a close behind her. It was dark, only a small amount of light filtering in through the security mesh-covered window. She dared not turn on the lights. Instead she sat at the computer and turned it on. Password protected, of course. Instead, she jacked in, and after a short series of coding hacks, had unlocked the desktop.
She would need to talk to River about beefing up his security measures.
His messages were innocuous; communications with clients, contacts, and so on. She hit the files tab and found more to see there. Again, mostly to do with River’s cases. But there was one file simply labelled ‘V’. A tickle went along the back of her neck. She opened it up.
Inside were copies of communications between River and Arasaka. Dozens of emails, photos and text files, going back weeks.
V’s mouth went dry. What? What on Earth did River have to talk about with those murdering, thieving, corpo scumbags?
Before she could open the first file, she was startled by the door opening.
“Find anything interesting?”
River.
V stood up. Caught red-handed. “Wha-?”
“V, you’re the best fucking merc in this city, but that doesn’t translate to detective skills. Or stealth. I knew you were out there all morning. I thought about just texting you, but I wanted to see what you were up to instead. Imagine my surprise to find my girlfriend breaking into my office.”
For a split second V was embarrassed at being so easily caught surveilling him and snooping through his stuff when she was just sitting here mentally chiding him over his lackluster security, but that thought was quickly taken over by anger. “Arasaka? Really? What the fuck, River?”
He sighed and fully entered the office, allowing the door to close behind him. He turned on the lights and flopped on a moth-eaten couch in the corner. “Did you read any of what was in there?”
“I didn’t get that far,” she bit out. “Why don’t you sum it up for me?”
“I’m trying to save your life.”
V blinked. “Huh?”
River laughed, a deep belly laugh. “Not often I get one over on the great V.”
“Arasaka can’t save my life, River. I already tried that route.”
“Yeah, you tried that route with Hanako, who had her own motives, and she wasn’t particularly interested in helping you.”
V moved around River’s desk and stood in front of him. “This is what you’ve been doing sneaking around the past couple weeks? Trying to - to save my stupid life?”
“Hey,” River said sharply. He stood up and grabbed V by the arms. “Your life isn’t stupid. You don’t even realize what you’ve done, do you?”
“What did I do?” V asked, her voice barely above a whisper, suddenly completely lost in this conversation.
“You’ve changed my life, and the lives of so many others. You’re a force for good in this city.” River released her arms, but stayed standing in front of her, causing V to crane her neck up to meet his gaze.
“It doesn’t feel that way,” V said. Me? A force for good? Hah..
“I know. But that’s why I’m here, to look out for you. Even if you don’t realize it, this city is better off with you in it, than without you. And I’m gonna help you.”
“Okay but… what changed? With Arasaka?” V asked, taking a deep breath. River stepped back again, giving her space to process what he was telling her.
“I’ve spoken with Yorinobu’s people. They have some ideas they can try. Nothing’s for sure, but.. There’s hope. Hanako was not interested in helping you before. Yorinobu is.”
“But… why?” V asked. “Why would he want to help me, after everything?”
“Because Yorinobu is a practical man. And there’d be some hefty trade offs in return for a cure.”
V shook her head. “No, River, you don’t want to enter into deals with Arasaka. It always ends badly.”
“If it ends with you alive, I can take whatever bad comes with it,” River replied.
“What did you agree to, River?” V furrowed her brow.
“Well, two things. First, you, uh, would have to leave Arasaka alone. Forge a peace. Forever.” River shrugged a little.
V rolled her eyes. “Right. Leave Arasaka to do their shady shit in peace. No surprise there. What’s the second thing?”
River rubbed his hand over his face and looked away from V. “The second is that I work for them. On a contract basis,” he added hastily. “Investigate stuff for them from time to time, gather intelligence or whatever else they might be needing.”
“No!” V sputtered. “River, you - no, they - they would own you, make you do whatever they want!”
“Honestly V, I don’t think they really care about me so much, or what I might have to offer,” River said.
Comprehension dawned on V. “That’s even worse,” she whispered.
River moved over and gestured at the couch. “Sit down, V.”
She numbly crossed the small office space and fell to the couch next to him. “I guess that’d be the only way to keep me in line. Lyin’ to Arasaka ain’t exactly a new thing for me. I’d never keep that promise.”
“You go back on your word to leave them alone…” River trailed off, but he didn’t need to finish the sentence.
“I can’t believe you’d put yourself on the line for me like that. Tie your life to mine.” V laughed.
“Happily,” he replied, not a trace of humor in his voice. “Not even a question. Hell, I’d even make it official. Get rings involved and all that. But we gotta get past this road block first.”
V looked up at him. It never ceased to amaze her how he could see a future with her when she could barely see past 4 hours in the future. Course, she had an expiration date, so that accounted for it a little bit.
“I mean all this depends on them actually finding a cure,” V said.
“Yeah. Which is why I didn’t bring it up to you yet. I wanted to wait until I knew for sure. I’m waiting to hear on this idea. The Arasaka tech guys are working on it right now.”
“What is it?”
“Well, they’ve been working on cloning the past few decades. They were already close.”
“Clones? How does that help me?”
“Simple. Clone your body, move your engram from your current body to the new one, one that hasn’t been ravaged by the relic.”
“It can’t be that simple,” V shook her head.
“A lot of things can be when you’re the most powerful corp on the planet. Please, V,” River’s voice took a desperate note. “Can we try?”
V’s eyes moved across River’s face as she considered. They landed on River’s ever-present earring - a sideways peace sign. A good metaphor for this deal he wanted her to enter into with Arasaka. Sideways peace.
She looked back up at him.
“How can I say no to that face?”
***
River took her to Arasaka the next day. They didn’t meet with Yorinobu, but V was taken into different labs for various tests, had blood and cell samples taken, and brain and body scans done. Every way of medically recording a person’s existence was done to her. It was 18 grueling hours. There wasn’t a pore unprobed on her body by the time they were done.
Afterwards, they were ushered out with promises of receiving a phone call when they were ready to commence the transfer.
River dragged V to a diner and bought her dinner. Despite that she hadn’t eaten in a day, she wasn’t hungry. She poked at the food in front of her and tried really hard not to think about the fact her entire genetic code was in the hands of Arasaka, and they were attempting to make a full blown copy of her.
“It’s really weird,” V said.
River looked at her from across the table. “I know.”
“Will I still be me?” V asked, sounding far more vulnerable than she liked.
“Your body is just a shell,” River said after a moment of contemplation. “Your mind is what makes you who you are. That part will always be you.”
V nodded. She grabbed her sandwich and took a bite. The second the food hit her tongue, her stomach sprang to life, grumbling loudly.
“Fuck, I’m hungry.”
***
They sat side by side on top of the water tower, legs and arms brushing against each other. River had suggested it and V had found she didn’t hate the idea. A quiet night looking out over the city, just her and River - one last night, before the last day of the rest of her life. A goodbye.
“This city’s changed ‘cause of you,” River murmured.
V half-smiled. “I never woulda thought that would be my legacy. Hell, never thought I’d have had a legacy.”
River brushed the top of her hand with his fingers, then entwined his fingers with hers. “I’ve also changed ‘cause of you.”
“Nah,” V disagreed immediately. “You are who you are, River. A good man. I just brought a little excitement into your life.”
River chuckled. “That’s for sure.”
They lapsed into silence, feeling each other’s heartbeats through their joined hands, gripped together tightly.
V didn’t want to do this, but it was her last chance at actually living the rest of her life. If she didn’t, she’d definitely be dead soon. Weeks, Vik thought. But really, she could have a fatal stroke at any moment.
“If I don’t survive this -” V started, but stumbled over her words. “If I…” She trailed off, unsure of what she was even trying to say.
“You don’t have to talk, V,” River’s warm voice washed over her.
“I just gotta say one thing,” V turned towards River. She observed his profile, his features barely visible in the darkness, but his eye reflecting the glow Night City below them. He felt her gaze and turned to meet it. “I love you, River.”
River broke out into a smile. “Yeah?”
“The normal thing is to say it back,” V returned the smile and reached up to place her hands on either side of his face.
“I’ve already said it to you before,” River chuckled. He let V pull his head towards hers for a kiss.
“A girl still likes to hear it,” she whispered against his lips.
River kissed her again, then gripped her tightly in a hug. V felt surrounded by his warmth, and she relished it, even though it was not a cold night.
River brushed his lips against her ear. “I love you too.”
***
The Arasaka techs were quiet, doing their tasks with crisp certainty, no unsurety or hesitation. It made V feel slightly more comfortable, like maybe this wasn’t all doomed to end in her death.
She was sitting in a chair, like one you’d find at a ripperdoc’s, but more advanced and with several more attachments coming off it than usual. V turned to her right - she could see River on the other side of a large observation window. He gave her a tight smile and a nod. Clearly meant to be encouraging, but she could see River’s nervousness from top to bottom. But he could only feel a fraction as nervous as V did. She looked down at her hands as the techs placed devices on her fingertips, meant to monitor biosigns. Her hands were shaking slightly, and definitely damp with sweat. The techs said nothing.
“You fellas done this before?” V asks, attempting for humor. They mostly ignore her except the one closest to her, who simply levels a look at her before resuming her task of tapping things on the monitor in front of her.
V looked to a far corner of the room, which was cloaked in darkness thanks to the series of spotlights pointed directly at her. She took a breath and imagined Johnny there. Leaning against the wall, one foot propped up. Smoking, maybe. The glint of his arm reflecting the spotlights as he took a drag. He’d say something cutting yet poignant about her inability to accept death. She hated to admit it but fuck, she missed him sometimes.
“Put your head back,” said one of the techs.
V turned back to face the ceiling as a headset was placed and tightened to the top of her head.
“You’ll feel some pinches,” another said and there were suddenly a dozen sharp pokes around her scalp.
“We’re ready to begin,” said the first tech, but not to V. He was looking up into the shadows, where V couldn’t see. He was clearly waiting for some kind of response, and he got it a moment later. He turned back to his monitor. “In 5…”
V closed her eyes.
“4.”
She took a deep breath.
“3.”
She thought she could smell the leather of Johnny’s jacket.
“2.”
She imagined she could feel River’s skin against hers.
“1.”
And then.. nothing.
Nothing for what felt like a split second, and eternity all at the same time.
Gradually, sound penetrated the nothing. Buzzing.. Beeping. Talking. Screaming. Someone was screaming. It sounded familiar…
“Wake up!”
V’s eyes snapped open. She was staring at the ceiling again. Surrounded by the lights, and the Arasaka techs. The headset was being pulled off her.
“What happened?” V muttered, though she don’t think anyone heard her. There was a flurry of activity around her. Her mouth felt dry, but otherwise, she felt the same. “Did it fail?”
The techs were excitedly looking through readouts on the various monitors.
“Am I alive?” V whispered, confused. Would someone tell her what the hell was going on?
She heard a frenetic rapping on the glass window. V turned to the right, to look at River - but there was just a wall there. “Where’s the window?” she asked aloud.
The rapping again - this time she could triangulate it, to her left. V turned to her left instead, and there was the window, and River. But he was on my right…
River had his hands up against the glass, smiling wide, and V felt her heart rate skyrocket. Which alarmed the techs momentarily until they realized she was stable.
V shot up in her seat and looked around at the beaming faces.
“It was a success.” Yorinobu’s voice floated from above somewhere. A speaker - he was watching the whole time.
V felt all over her body - it all felt the same. Her skin, her hair, scars and moles - every last detail was faithfully recreated.
River’s words reverberated in her head. Your mind is what makes you who you are.
“I’m me,” V said loudly, and the techs all laughed, but she didn’t care.
V locked eyes with River on the other side of the glass and they smiled at each other.
“I’m alive.”